The Commercial Break - Good Luck At O'Shagahans!

Episode Date: March 13, 2023

O'Shagahans...it might not be the best hotel in Vegas, but it sure is the most confusing! Bryan goes on a business trip to Vegas and wins big in an unexpected way. Bryan goes to Vegas! TCB is once again fighting on the front lines for airport ettiquette Bryan makes some interesting acquaintances on his flight... When in Vegas, take a trip to an empty weed store Bryan goes to the “Casino” restaurant! Best food ever, even with the italian gangsters lurking in the corner Vegas is the true 24 hour city! Bryan hangs some ball air in his hotel window Turns out...those windows are NOT mirrored Is Steve Wynn a dick? TCB has trouble with the word “bogglingly” Bryan has a wild LV airport story He might have made enemies of Bob & Tom from the plane, but he ended up winning big LINKS: Send us show ideas, comments, questions or concerns by texting us or leaving a voicemail at: 1.855.TCB.8383 Speak to TCB LIVE by calling 775.TCB.LIVE (1.775.822.5483) Tuesday-Thursday 12pm-5pm EST Watch TCB on YouTube Creator: Bryan Green Co-Host: Bryan Green Co-Host: Krissy Hoadley Written By: Bryan Green Exec Producers: Bryan Green & Krissy Hoadley Content Production & Research: Tina Khano YouTube Producer & Editor: Morgan Please Audio Editing: Christina A. Executive Director: Astrid B. Associate Producer: Gustavo Episodic Contribution: Marianne, Diane, Natalie, Will The Champ, Will D** Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

After the break, we're going to interview Eric Y. Hane-Mayer, who climbed the highest mountain in the world, Mount Everest. But he's gay. I mean, he's gay. Excuse me, he's blind. On this episode of the commercial break... But let me tell you something, Addo Shaggahans. There is a battalion of sex workers Okay Perusing around the casino and hotel You can just... That's old Vegas

It's old Vegas And it's old sex workers It's like they moved from the wind To a shaggy hands on a certain age Let's do it The next episode of the commercial break starts now Ah, yeah, cats again Welcome back to another episode of the commercial break on Brian Green. This is my dear friend and co-host, the wonderful Kristen Joy, totally convinced you, Chris.

And that's you Brian. The best you out there in the podcast universe. Are you a Vegas girl? You've been to Vegas. I haven't been to Vegas many times. I am not a Vegas girl. You're not a Vegas girl. No, why? No, it's... I would think of. I am not a Vegas girl. You're not a Vegas video. No, why?

No, it's... I would think of you as like a total Vegas girl. Ha ha. Like, I know you and your personal life, right? And I know that you can go hard. Like, you can go hard. You hang in there with the best of them. Mm-hmm.

So I would think that Vegas is just your speed. No. Like, let's get crazy. Let's go multiple places. Let's get shots everywhere. Let's keep on going I don't I don't think you're using gambling type of person But I think if you was like Vegas, so all the bright lights 20 on red you put 20 on red. It's so a lot of guys Like 20 on red. Yeah, 20 on red. I just got back from a good. Oh, no, I was just gonna say I

It's kind of sad. It's got a sad. It does you know it does. I totally agree with you Yes, there is a sad. There is no doubt in my mind. I've been to New York a lot, I've been to Vegas a lot. I think there's no comparison. I think Vegas is the true 24 hour city. Oh, it is, absolutely no. Anything goes 24 hours a day.

24 hours a day, but what I mean by that is in New York, there is a difference between the daytime and the nighttime. The party shifts to other places, like not everywhere in New York there is a difference between the daytime and the nighttime. There is. The party shifts to other places like not everywhere in New York City is 24 hours. Yes. There are certainly elements where you know you can go to get food to 24 hours or go to a club 20 but Vegas is the same no matter what hour day or night. Yeah. It's exactly the same.

I just got back from there's always that sad person sitting there. Oh, I got stuck next to him on the way to Vegas. And they have slot machines like in the airport. It's what I'm just about to talk about. Okay. So I go to Vegas to the podcast conference. Yes. On the way to the podcast.

Because you represent as well. I represented us very well. Thank you very much. Brian Green, comedian. That's right. And the commercials. I was like, the commercial breaks. I was on stage and I said, excuse me guys,

I got a fit in one of my 21 EPMs. I'll be back in a few minutes. I went to a very nice restaurant. I said, do you have a DD counter? No one left. You know why the DD counter? Can I stick my balls in the wine? Yeah. You know why no one left?. cancer? Can I stick my balls in the wine? Yeah.

You know why no one laughed? Because not a single person in the podcast in the street listens to this show. Okay, so let me type out my trip to Vegas because I think it's good. So I am slated to go there just for two days. I got a brand new baby and Astrid is already way sick of me.

I mean, if it wasn't for the commercial break making money, I think Astrid would have been gone a long time ago. But she says, okay, understood. She's actually been very understanding. She's like, no, you need to go. It's part of your job and just go and I'll deal with it. So I go to Vegas and I get 11 o'clock in the morning flight out to Vegas, which,

so I mean, I could have a story just tell later, but anyways, about my Vegas flight. Out there. Save it. Put it in the pocket, write it on the book. We want to tell it. I show up to that flight. I always get the window seat if I can, because that's what I like to do.

I like to squirrel away in the corner. I don't want to talk to anybody. I don't want anybody touching me. I just want to sit and watch out the window. I love the windows seat. The window seat is the only seat on the plane. As far as I'm concerned. Because you know what?

The aisle seat gives you the impression that you have more room. I'm going to have a room. I just want to sit and watch out the windows. I love the windows. The window seat is the only seat on the plane. As far as I'm concerned. Because you know what? The aisle seat gives you the impression that you have more room, like you like to kick that left or that right leg out. But the truth is, a couple of Yahoo's who's walked down the aisle,

Naki and the knees a couple of times, you are cured. Have that. Yeah, Naki and the shoulder. You're cured of that delusion because the truth is, the aisle seat is just as bad as the middle seat. It's like, you're always like this.

Ah, excuse me. I get on the plane in my seat. Never as bad as the middle seat. It's like you're always like this. Ah, excuse me. I get on the plane in my seat. Never in the history of Brian flying, have I ever, Olivia Mung has not sat next to me on the plane. Do you know what I'm saying? I think there's some kind of, I think there's some kind of program in the reservation system that marks you as a single guy

or a guy's flying by yourself and then says, let's put other single guys in this aisle so as not to cause any drama. I swear to God, I think so because I've never sat next to a female form. Never! Never! So, for the sake of plenty of guys on my trip.

Well, I wish you would sit next to me because I'm getting sick of these. Yahoo! I said next to. I get to the gate and I'm standing there. And of course, we have to do the gate shuffle. Didn't we put this on the treaty? This was what was else was on the treaty.

The airplane gate treaty of 2022. I am putting it down. Please for the love of all that's fucking holy. Stay seated until someone calls your zone. You know what the problem is. That's a ridiculous. Everyone gets it in their head. That they're missing out on something.

It's ridiculous. They stand there. They stay in the lock up the way. Yes. And then when your gate is called in, they're not there. They have to stand down and you just walk. There's always one lady who runs to the front of the line,

30 minutes before the gate opens, and she's already complaining, I need extra time to get down. What do you need extra time for? Both of you are standing there for 30 minutes. If you can stand for 30 minutes, you don't need extra time getting down the goddamn gate. Stop it.

Stop it with yourself. You're flying all the way in the back of the, but we know you, we've seen you before. So I'm sitting there, and across, where I'm sitting in the gate area, across from me is Bob and fucking Tom. Bob and fucking Tom, let me explain who Bob and Tom is. Not that it matters. But Bob is about 320, 6'1. Big boy, right? Let me explain one thing that should tell you everything you need to know about Bob. Bob is wearing jeans that are four sizes too big for him.

And he has missed three of the six belt loops on his pants. So his pants are right now. Yeah, but you can see like the belt is all caffuckta. He's got a shirt half tucked in. He's got a hat, kick sideways. The only thing that and Tom has a shirt on that says show me your pits With a picture of a mask car vehicle With the headlights on So here we go. I haven't even gotten on the fucking flame And I'm already miserable. I'm already in in my head I'm like, please for the love. I swear, I'll start going to church on Sundays.

If you just don't put Bob and Tom next to Brian, please don't make Bob the guy in the middle. Guess what? Bob the guy in the middle. The entirety of the flight, from the time they sit down to the time that they get off the plane, all they can talk about is the tits

they're gonna see in Vegas, the five they're gonna put down on Notre Dame. That off the plane. All they can talk about is the tits they're going to see in Vegas, the five they're going to put down on Notre Dame. Both tits and pits. The five they're going to put down on, you know, North Carolina, the beaten Duke or whatever, the craft stable that they're going to go to the Oshaga hands down at the end. Now everybody's super excited. He's like, they're all charged up. Mm-hmm. So they get on. Can't eat a lot as all around. Woohoo! I drink for free.

I smoke for free. They only took $6,000 of my dollars at the tables. It's the best place on earth. These are the kind of guys that try and out drink their losses. Do you know what I'm saying? Yeah. We'll just drink as much as we can because that'll absorb some of the losses So as soon as the plane takes off and those televisions come on Bob and Tom are both watching independent basketball games And they I have my headphones on I'm trying to watch a British comedy television show

So sophisticated Bob's entire body is on top of me He's on it's just on top of me. He's just on top of me. When he moves, he makes no effort whatsoever to keep himself around his own seat. He's hitting me with his arm. He's going like this. He's so animated when someone scores a basket. He's like, He's red-faced.

Tom is like, Tom's losing the game. So Tom's like, Goddamn it. Goddamn it. He's slapping his leg. Goddamn it, Goddamn it. And I'm like, Jesus, Jones, guys, just settle down for four fucking hours. It's 11 o'clock in the morning.

I silently watch your basketball game. Chrissy, as soon as we get off the plane, because I'm now in behind them, because they get out first, and now we're all walking in that line, as soon as we get off the plane, Bob and Tom stop right at the gate door and Bob looks at Tom and he goes, I say we do a hundred on this one right here, this one looks fantastic. The slot machine directly outside the gate door. Bob cannot, he is such a degenerate that he cannot wait for 15 fucking seconds. He's got to play the one he sees first.'s an intern. Vegas is filled with these guys. Filled with these guys, especially at the sports books.

You go to a sports book, look for a vagina. Good luck finding a vagina. Anyone that's working there, it's all guys. They're all sitting there. They're half of them miserable. The other half are yelling and screaming. It is kind of a sad place because you know that when I walk through that sports book,

I know that at least 10% of these human beings are in big fucking trouble. You know what I'm saying? They're trying to gamble their way out of losses. Absolutely. It's an addiction and I feel bad for those who are caught up in it. So we're going to have a little fun with it today, but I do think I do, you know, whatever call your gambling. I'm talking to your therapist.

What am I? I'm a doctor fucking fan. I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor.

I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor. I was not at circus circus circus circus the very first time I ever met me to meet as an adult when I went by myself. I stayed at circus circus to a York. Yeah. We're staying at some property off like a mile off the strip off the strip what they refer to as old Vegas. Oh, the old Vegas area.

Not like the one with the big the big canopy. This is literally out in the middle of the desert in a really not so great part of town. It's a resort that it's got one bar in the entire casino. What? Chrissy, they had like, you know, every big casino has the shopping mall. And they have what? Gucci and Louis Vuitton. I pull up to this hotel. I get out. Oscar's forgot. Oscar's forgot what about a step up. It's got a lady who's selling incense and crystals. Yeah, it's got Shandy Handys massage parlor. It's got an entire store dedicated to the Raiders.

And then it's got a gift shop that's still got silk screen t-shirts being printed. Oh, like the airbrush? Yeah, no, the kind where you like eating a steamer. Like that you make your own design and you steam them. It's class act over there. I went over to the window hotel and it's like, it's like the world's largest Louis Vuitton store.

I go back to my... Beautiful murals on the ceiling. Yeah, next. I go back to my hotel. It looks like a really big sit-co. You know what I'm talking about? It's got all that drink. It's a bullshit.

So I check in. They tell me it's at the North Tower. I don't know where the fuck is in the North Tower. Oh, it's easy. Take a left here. Go to the right when it splits. Go to the left. Then back over to the right.

Look for the elevators. You're going to go on the second tech of elevators. Okay. Sure. Whatever that means. Yes, simple. Hopefully there are signs to guide me. There are no signs to guide me. I'm just walking around aimlessly around this mall.

And I asked the lady who worked at one of the stores. I'm like, do you know where the North Tower elevators are? She goes, I'm sorry, I just work here. Yeah, that's why I'm asking you. To shit head. Why do you need this place? The elevators are three elevators for a hotel that has 1800 hotel rooms in it.

And the North Tower in and of itself has 900. So there are three elevators, one of which is broken. So now there's two elevators. This hotel was built back in the 60s. So the elevators are from 1960s. The Franks and I used to play there. Not Frank Sinach. I don't want to give it away because I don't want to bash the hotel specifically. Like there might be some people that like it. There's other versions of this hotel around the world that I'm sure are much nicer, but those elevators, Chrissy, I stood when I was looking to get to my room.

I stood near the elevators for at least 11 minutes, waiting for an elevator to come down. And at that time, now there's 300 people waiting for an elevator because there's 900 other rooms up there. No one has any regard for anyone else. They're smushing us in like sardines. I fucking hate that, drives me crazy. I get up to the lady says,

where are you wearing a mask? Wearing a mask. Kind of nonsense, are you talking about wearing a mask? No one wears masks anymore. It's free for all. There's always one lady who's wearing a mask. It always seems to be a lady. She's always wearing a mask. And then wears masks, because anymore, it's free for all. There's always one lady who's wearing a mask. It always seems to be a lady. She's always wearing a mask.

And then I like to give her a... And I'm kind of like, damn, I should be wearing one too. Me too, I always go shit. This lady came prepared. I didn't know what I was walking into. If I would have gone to the wind, I would have had a private elevator straight to my room. But here I am at Oshaga hands

or whatever the fuck wherever the fuck we are. I get in the room. There's a roach crawling. Oh, shag of hands. I get in the room. There's a roach crawling across the wall. I have a beautiful. They're a mirrored ceiling. Oh my God. Chrissy, I can't even explain how bad this hotel room was, but the worst part is that I do have a beautiful view of the strip a mile away. Right. I can't walk there. of the strip, a mile away. Right. I can't walk there. I'm not gonna get there. It was nice.

Yeah, that's a beautiful, I thought, what is that? The New York, New York? I think I see that. I heard that roller coaster on top. I have to, yeah. It was a waste of $25. Did you ever get to pay for it?

Yeah. But it was fun. Did you like it? At the time. Yeah, I didn't like it. I was like, hey, whatever, $25. So I get to this hotel room and then I'm just like, okay, I'm gonna be here for 48 hours. I'm literally here for 48 hours.

I'm flying in on Wednesday. I'm leaving on Friday. I can deal with this. It's fine. Placed to lay my head, you know, not a huge drinker. Don't do a lot of gambling. So I don't need extreme comfort. I just need a place to lay my head.

Yes, straight. That's right. I just need a place to lay my head. Yes, that's right I just need a place for the hooker to put her purse. That's all I need prostitute sex worker. Sorry sex work is work Not a hooker But let me tell you something at Oshaga hands. There is a battalion of sex workers Okay, perusing around the casino and hotel you can just let's old Vegas. It's old Vegas and it's old sex workers. It's like they moved from the wind. So, shaggy hands at a certain age. How do you go?

So... Like the Claremont. It is like the Claremont. So, what's the first thing that you got to do in Vegas? Put 20 on red. No, I'm going to go to the weed store. That's what I'm going to do. Oh, right.

It's like weed store. I'm forget that everything's legal now. I've never been to a weed store. Oh, you haven't? No, I've never go to the weed store. That's what I'm going to do. Oh, right. I forget that everything's legal now. I've never been to a weed store. Oh, you have this? No, I've never been to a weed store. I've never been inside of a weed store. Oh, it's fun. Yeah, so I thought to myself, there was a couple other people there and they were like,

they were going to go and what. Everybody, guys. Yeah. Colorado or California. Colorado, Vegas. Colorado, California. Yeah, yeah. You're going to the weed store.

You have to go to the weed store if the weed is legal in that in that state. And it's legal in Las Vegas. So, Chrissy, we go and we're like, okay, let's walk. It's only a mile away. We start walking. It's flat. There's no drama. I have the encounter of the people.

I have never. Never. Different all kinds. Yeah, we encounter demand with underwear on his head, but sand's underwear on his on the lower half of his body Where else did you wear? He was just walking with his dick out Crazy I never felt so unsafe in my life walking down this start of Vegas street We show up at this you you know, the weed pharmacy, they got three different locked doors you gotta get through.

Okay, you're asking if you're a whole security walk through. Yep. So we go there and, you know, I'm with some people and they're asking some questions, no, we're out of that. Nope, we're out of that. Nope, we don't have that. Nope, not that. And I'm like, we're gonna fucking weed stores.

We're gonna go to the largest weed store in the world, but we ended up at I can weed store this. I'm like, I'm not gonna like that. I'm like, I'm not gonna like that. I'm like, I'm not gonna like that. I'm like, I'm not gonna like that. I'm like, I'm not gonna like that. I'm like, I'm not gonna like that. I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, are flipping through and they're like, I'll take one of these and seven of these

and eight of these, no bank got none of that. Don't have any of that. You know what I do have? I have Dorito flavored weed chips. Do you want some of those? They're on sale. Well, buy one, get one free. And I'm like, if they're buy one, get one free.

If there's weed items that are buy one, get one free, it's because they suck. They're not selling. Yeah. First of all, say, how do you put weed in the Dorito? How do you do that? I mean, it's kind of genius. Can you like what you just cheat? Well, you get the munchies. The oil. Oh, yeah, that is. You get the munchies and then you get more munchies. You get the munchies and then you go to the hospital

because you have a panic attack. So we get back from the store and then there's going to be a big dinner. You know where we went to dinner? You ever seen that movie? Casino. No, Rose Chris. By the way, they have every fucking chain restaurant is on this street that this Bajama breeze. What's the last time you saw the Hama breeze?

Looking Puck has a hundred on. In Vegas. Yeah. He had 30 of them down in Florida. Ramsey Gordon Ramsey Gordon Ramsey. Yeah. He just, you know what he does? He just opens up a new one with one of those schmucks

from his show. Yeah, he says, you're gonna pay you $50,000 a year. Yeah. Go over my ass. Come make your shitty burgers over here. Actually, I have a friend who's been to one of the Gordon Ramsay restaurants.

They're good. No, it is good. I've been there. Yeah. So we are gonna go to the, you have to see the Venetian. You've see, oh, yeah. Thanks.

Venetian was, I could see it. I could see the Venetian was I could see it. I could see the Venetian Through my unclean windows this window's end been clean the 22 years I tried to take pictures, but all I could see was the dust my phone couldn't get faster I kept clicking for focus and all it was focusing on was the dirt on the window Chris yet swear to God Remind me to tell you about the windows too. Okay. So, get, you ever seen the movie Casina? Yeah, one of my favorite movies of all time.

Wonderful. You know that restaurant that they're always going to? Like the, the guy, the, the guy owns or he's part of or whatever, Joe Pesci's character. He vices that guy in the back. Vices is his head or whatever's going to. That's the restaurant we went to where it was filmed. is his head or whatever's going on. That's the restaurant we went to where it was filmed. Perionis, Perionis Italian restaurant, I think is how it's said. Chrissy, this place, the second. Legit. Legit.

There are people that were in this place, that were straight out of casting. It's as if they paid some Italian men to dress up like gangsters and just stand around. It says be there. It's so authentic. First of all, you're in that same restaurant. You're imagining yourself in the movie Casino.

Because if you've seen Casino, you've seen that scene a million times with their sitting in the booth. The booth is there. You can go take pictures, kneel before it, kiss its ring. I don't know what the fuck would you do. I'm like, I'm like,

I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like,

I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like,

I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, All the guys they just paid to stand there, right? So we're all sitting there having to drink waiting for the table and there's a TV in the corner and the TV in the corner is playing horse races Horse races and there's a guy standing under the TV Italian guy Gold chain You know big guy. It's got a foop. You know, I'm talking about he's standing there. He's drinking his drink He never moves from that location. He's standing

a glass of kian tea. Yeah, a gun. The guy's a kian te classic. Hey, Brian, send him a nigga, a glass of kian te classic. Before he breaks your legs. He's standing there. He never moves in the 30 minutes over there. You know what he's doing? He's a security for the play. I'm assuming he's security for the place. Like you know, the script security. He was watching the horse races. He was security for the place how would you not this script security watch the horse races he was not watching the horse races he was standing under the TV facing the room and just stood there for thirty and I thought I'm I said after a minute I was like clearly he's like security there's like old Italian men with their

gray hair all slick back there you know diminutive, they're five foot nine. Sucranos. Sucranos. Yeah. You got lucky two smokes, smoky bones, daddy gravy, Sunday dinner, you got the whole gangs all there. And then you get to the table and the food is like real Italian food. One of the dinners, one of the entrees is called Sunday gravy. That's what it's called, Sunday gravy. Amipala sauce, ja pasta. But the red sauce. Yes. is called Sunday gravy. That's what it's called Sunday gravy. I meet ball. Let's

toss it. Yeah. Pasta with the red sauce. Yes. I have never in my life felt so Italian and oddly at home. You know what I'm saying? Yeah. I felt like I was at home. It does. Thank you. Feel homey. It does totally. It makes you feel like I feel like a mine. Garlic, Guianti classical. Yeah. Red sauce. Joey break your bones standing under the horse races, horse races on. They got the fucking horse races on. In this place, we're going to pay $600 for a meal. It's incredible.

So we had dinner there and I'm telling you what, Chrissy, it was the best food ever. Yeah. Thank you, being hungry. I get back to the hotel room. I don't know where I am. I have had nothing to drink. Where's this, you're in the South Tower? I'm not even, I don't even know if I'm in the South Tower.

I'm not even sure I'm at the right hotel. I'm just, I just came with everybody else. I'm totally lost. I'm walking around this huge tower, trying to find my, the room numbers are really weird. It's like, one, one, dash, three, two, one, two, two, right? So, and I'm not really sure what all the numbers stand for, so I'm just trying to match them up to the doors,

but then they change and frequently, I have no idea what's, it was worst, it was the worst. It was the worst. I get in the room. I'm like, let me take a hot shower. I'm gonna take a hot shower. I'm gonna chill out. I'm gonna go to bed. I don't have the children. I'm like, let me take a hot shower. I'm gonna take a hot shower. I'm gonna chill out. I'm gonna go to bed.

I don't have the children. Eat some of the Doritos. I'll eat some of those Doritos that I got. I'll eat some of the weed they didn't have to sell us, right? I'll pretend that they had weed to sell us. I'll take a nap. Okay, I'll just eat my own weed though. Okay, I'll, yeah, that's right.

But I guess I have to dip into the stage I brought. So my thinking is, I'm gonna take a hot shower. By the way, the windows wide open, right? The curtains are wide open. Yeah. But I know for a fact that in Las Vegas, every window is a mirrored window. They're right.

You gotta keep the heat out, right? You gotta keep the heat out and everybody wants privacy. And so they're mirrored windows. I don't even think about it. I'm going to take a shower. I walk out, I got my balls flapping in the air. I'm just the ball air. Yeah, I got ball air flying everywhere.

Whee. Whee. Whee. I plug my phone in. I'm dancing around the room basically naked. No kids. No kids. No Chrissy. I plug my phone in, I'm dancing around the room, basically naked. No kids. No kids. No Chrissy. No commercial break audience, view in my balls. I just, I'm just out there. No fear that the paparazzi is gonna catch a nut pick

or something like that. I'm good. I'm great. So I take a shower, I go to bed. I wake up at like 4.45 because the time- Time change, yeah. And I'm used to getting up, like not as early as some people with kids, but I get up, you know, seven, seven, seven, thirty, something like that, seven, eight. Seven, eight.

So I pop up, and this is what makes me tell you that I think Valfegas is the true 24-hour town. G-Z-B. Hey everybody out there in the podcast universe, it's time for the dreaded commercial break inside the commercial break. It's season number four, you've heard it all before, so let's get to it quickly. You can text us or leave us a voicemail at 1-855-TCB-8383. Questions, comments, concerns or content ideas, send them to 855-TCB-8383 toll-free

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Now let's hear from those sponsors and we'll be back to this episode of the commercial break. Because it's 445 and I need a charger and I want a glass of coffee and I'm like, I'm like, I love a glass of wine. I think I'm like, I think I'm the classic. That wine that they're serving at that particular casino, not even sure what that is. Blacker. Yeah, it's grape juice with vinegar.

It's fermented match juice. Fermented match juice. And I've been fermented. So I think to myself, well, there's like, you know, 15 stores downstairs, there's gotta, you know, 15 stores downstairs. There's got to be a Starbucks somewhere close open. I mean, I had to walk over to the wind or whatever. I could probably state get a room. I also put it on the room tab. Yeah, put it on the room tab. You were there with a conference. I was there with a conference.

I thought to myself, I could go over to the wind. I had the whole thing of bacon and coffee. I call the room service. Oh, I call the room service. When I, like, you know, late at night, I thought, oh, let me get a little dessert, send up here a little sweet, right? I called and she was like, we close at 7.30 pm.

I'm like, you close at 7.30 pm. What time do you? I know. And then I'm like, what time do you guys open back up? And she's like 9.30. And I'm like, you're, you have room service from 9.30 to 7.30? After breakfast and before'm like, you're, you have room service from 930 to 730 after breakfast and before dinner is when you close. You're smunch, you have smunch available. And they don't even have

a menu. It's one of those kind of places where we're just calling a hope that they have something. But you can I get a cheeseburger? How about a grilled cheese? Sure. Can I get sourdough? How about, we don't have any bread, sir. I'm just gonna put some cheese on the plate, but I was like the weed store. So I get dressed and I think to myself, I can go find somebody's got a cup of coffee somewhere and maybe the front desk has a charger. I go downstairs and that could seem. You should just like, to feed yourself

up into like a conference that was really going on like, because I got those nice crafts, they got the silver, the silver crafts. That was part of the problem with this conference, which I like the conference. I'm not knocking the conference, but, and I think they have a deal with this particular hotel company that they do them all across the country.

Yeah, but they should have checked this one out beforehand. I mean, honestly, it was so bad that a lot of people didn't even stay there. They were like, we're gonna go stay at another hotel. It was so bad that on the flight there, somebody thought that they had misbooked my room, like for the different dates. And I was like, oh, well, that's okay. I'll just go online and I'll look and see if I can get a room, right? $33 is how much the room costs for the night. $33. I don't care where you are. $33 might sound good, but it's not good.

It's not. It can't be. It's impossible. It breaks the hundred. So I go downstairs. It takes me 42 minutes to go down the elevator. So I get down the elevator. I can't even find the stairs in this place.

I get down the elevator. I walk. The doors open and I walk through the little mall. Most things are closed, but they do have a little store that's open. I get my charger and then I walk, the door's open and I walk through the little mall, most things are closed, but they do have a little store that's open, I get my charger and then I go, oh, let me just like walk around the casino for a minute. The casino is as busy as it was when I walked in the door to go to sleep.

It's just insane to me. I mean, I've been to Vegas a million times and I know this to be true. There's no windows because they don't want you to know what time it is. There's no clocks because they don't want you to know what time it is. There's no clocks because they don't know what want you to know what time it is. Another pump in oxygen in there and booze. Oxygen booze and the weed that that weed store should have.

It's C-B-D. C-B-D. So I'm walking through and guess who I see at the sports boat. Elon Musk. Bob and Tom. Shhh, show me your fits. They're there? They're there wearing the same clothes, holding the same bags that they took off the plane.

They didn't even go to sleep. They went straight to the shittiest hotel in Las Vegas. I decided to start gambling. Chrissy, this blew my fucking mind. I couldn't believe that Bob and Tom were just sitting there gambling at 445 in the morning. And I can. You wouldn't think, you wouldn't want to go and take a shower.

No, I would. Would you? I wouldn't be Bob and Tom. I know, but would any, doesn't you think like any human being would say, let me get to the hotel room and freshen up a little bit? I'm going to get there quick to the gamble. And then 10 hours later, that's how they lose you. I mean, you're lost.

I don't even think Bob and Tom made their flight back. Probably not because they sold their airline tickets. Neither did I. That's right. Okay. I go outside right before the sun comes up. I go outside just, you were taking the red eye No, this is before I let this before I left it So this same night when I got the charger in the coffee I walk outside and I'm like oh, let me just like take a quick Brisk walk around get the legs get the blood flow and it's 4.45 in the morning 5 in the morning. I'm feeling I

Go around I walk outside the big plate, you know, valet station or whatever I walk in then I go around and I'm going toward The big sign that's sitting on the street and I look back to the hotel and I'm like, wow, so you know, I'm kind of a big hotel that has all the lights that are on. You can see directly in the windows. There are no mirrors. I have been butt-ass naked for this entire time so we can take it in front of the window and everything could have been seen. I'm nervous because you know how the paparazzi likes to follow us around. They do. It's problematic.

Yes. Specifically you. Specifically me. So, conference goes on and- You like to do the busy mobiles? But, some of the girls were given the strange looks. They're probably like, are you that guy from that show? They're the commercial break.

A bunch of assholes. A couple of breaks. Could the commercials break? So, conference day I go, we talk for a little bit or whatever, get on stage, do our little thing. We get off of stage and we all decide we've got to get out of this, so shag of hands.

We got to get to some casino that looks, that where we feel like we're actually in faith. We went to the win, which is so beautiful. It's not even funny. I wouldn't decorate my house like that in red and gold and lots of color, but it is gorgeous. They had a carousel, a full carousel.

You know what I'm talking about with the horses? You know, like, can you see it? They, a full carousel. You know what I'm talking about with the horses? You know, like, kind of you see it, it's new, they had a full carousel that was decorated with fresh flowers. The entire thing. The flies touch. Flowers everywhere. And the lady, some mother lady was talking

to a person who worked there. And the person who worked there said, this is here 365 days a year, they changed the flowers when they get rotten. They changed the flowers out. Of course, they're taking insane. It's the win. It's the win. they get rotten they change the flowers out. Of course they're fucking insane. It's the win. It's the win.

Steve win is the King of Las Vegas. I don't care who I don't care what you think but is he a dick? I think he is who told you that. Do you have friends on my personal Elizabeth Hurley? Elizabeth Hurley. Elizabeth Hurley. She can pregnant by him. She did.

Yeah. She did the whole thing a while back. Really? Elizabeth Hurley. She can pregnant by home. She does. Yeah, she did. There's a whole thing a while back. Really? Elizabeth Hurley is very beautiful. They have a child together? That child is the luckiest bastard I've ever met in my entire life. That whole empire is going to be his, is Steve acknowledges the child. That whole empire is going to be his.

Can you imagine owning a hotel like that? No, I would sell it immediately. You wouldn't like. Don't you think it'd be cool just to walk and I'd keep the penthouse. Yeah, I don't think it works like that. I don't think you're gonna like sell but can I keep the top floor. I mean, I guess you could buy it back. It'd be a little weird. Okay. I'm gonna say everything except for floors 3, 7, 12, and 19. It's part of the deal. You're only gonna get half the hotel.

I want everything from 12 up. If I could walk into one of those hotels, the penthouse was mine, and I owned it all, my balls would be dragging on the floor. They'd be so big, I'd be walking around like, King's shit, just like Steve Windos, sleeping with Elizabeth Hurley. Wow, I didn't know that.

Yeah, really? That's crazy. Who is that kid and how do we get him onto the commercial breaks? I don't know, we need to get him onto the commercial breaks. So we go to the wind. It's just like it's so staggeringly obvious what the difference is between this hotel

that we're staying at and that hotel that we want to be staying at that most other people are staying at because they decided day one I'm not staying here. And because the wind is probably only $133.00. You know, the hotel rooms away for free. They don't care about the hotel room. They don't care about those hotel rooms because that's not where they make the money. They make the money downstairs like casinos.

And by the way, you could get lost in a win casino. Those things are huge. And that's part of, we are amazing creatures humans are that we make these things that are so beautiful and mind bogglingly big. Did I even say that right? I'm boggling. Mind boggling, Mine, boggling. Boggling. Bogglingly. Big.

And you could get lost in just the casino of the win. Not to... Ding. Ding. Ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding. That's how you get lost. Welcome to the win, sir. Good luck.

Good luck. Yeah. Everybody says good luck to you. Good luck. Good luck. Yeah, everybody says good luck to you. Good luck. Good luck. So I, last minute, I'm like, okay, I'm supposed to leave early in the morning. Let me figure out how I get on the red eye because I want to get on the red eye.

I have a podcast guy. I mean, what did you, did you speak your mind? Yeah, I don't want to get into that. I guess I did. I don't want to get into that. You mean out of the podcast conference, girl? Yeah, we just... You were a speaker. Yeah, I did. I don't want to get into that. You mean out of the podcast conference, guys? Yeah, we just speaker.

Yeah, I did. Well, I did a panel. I moderated a panel. Okay. Are you moderated? I moderated the panel. I bet you did a better job than my guy. Sure, shit did.

You know what I did? I just said their names and that's it. That way, I don't get anything else wrong. Correctly. I said them correctly. I said, here's him. This is him and that's him. And you can figure out about him by Googling him.

I have a bunch of assholes. So while I'm at the wind, I'm like, let me see if I can get on the red eye, right? Astrid's got the port, she's with all the kids. You know, it might be nice if I can get home just a little bit earlier. That makes for you. Astrid's like the depression there. I know.

He's got a couple of things. He's got the fuck kill him. He's like attached to her legs. He's like that man. I'm like killing him. Attached to her legs. He's a dead man! I'm like daddy. I know. He's happy. Kapal.

But Diaz is FaceTiming me a 2 in the morning. Hi daddy. Matias, what's going on? I don't know, mommy lash. Here, she left a note. Dear Brian, fuck you. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, fun of me.

You deal with it. I'm on my way to Vegas. You deal with it. So I get to, I manage to get the red eye. I'm going, I'm leaving it like 11. Yeah. And then I'm going to get, I'll land it six. I'll be back in the,

The shaft's got a really funny story in the good graces The red eye coming out of it. Oh man the red eye coming out of Vegas. Oh yes they are And you know there's okay so I get there at 11 No one's fresh. Yeah coming out of it. Is it the red eye? Everyone like it's a It smells a little weird you know even the gate is a little weird, like everybody's a little itchy. But so was I, and I would think that anybody that looked at me, let me tell the story.

So I get there at 10.30, 11.19 flight, we're gonna start boarding at 11.50. No, our 10.50, no problem. I got plenty of time. I got through security, I got not checking any bags. I'm good. Your weed Doritos. I got my weed Doritos. I got a box full of gummies that have no THC because I didn't have THC

related products at the weed fucking store. The only fucking weed store that I've ever been to and they don't have weed related shit. No dippity dabs, no bliggity blocks, no Brian ass, no nothing. So I'm plenty of time so I go to that AMX lounge. Oh yeah. I check in. I go to the bathroom. I go to freshen up powder my nose. Do the whole nine yard powder my nose. Can you imagine being high at cocaine for a flight wouldn't that be the worst wouldn't oh okay never mind. Chrissy says imagine it. I did it last week. Sometimes I take flights when I'm high on cocaine for the fun.

Just have somebody to talk to. That's another story for another time. When I go to the bathroom, I think to myself, okay, Brian, you know, when you go in security, I often in the cab or right before I get into the cab or wherever I'm the car or whatever, I put all the stuff that I'm gonna need to take out

for security, I put it in the back. Like your license or hold that your phone. And now all I need is my phone though. That's all you need, your phone. They don't even check your license anymore. They already have a picture of you in 15,000 different places. So it's getting scary actually. So I think to myself, all I need is my phone,

but then when I get through to the AMX lounge after security, I'm like, okay, let me get my car keys out, my parking ticket, the stuff that I'll need once I get back to the airport and then I can just, yeah, I'm gonna put it in my pocket now. I'm a smart traveler. I don't like the bother anybody. I don't wanna make anybody upset to lay anything,

because there's nothing worse than the guy who's never been to a security line in front of you at the security line. When the ladies like, so take off your shoes, we need your shoes. I have shoes. You want me to take off shoes? Do you have TSA now? Who, me? Yeah. I've got clear. I've got, I'm going to get that TSA thing on Tuesday. We got the TSA thing and love it. Yeah. You know what the truth is is that I hope that the, you know, the commercial break in the first thing that comes up on the TSA security check So we're good though. I'm thinking to myself. I think I'm a keys

Let me get some other stuff and then I can't find my keys I'm like, where's the keys to my car? Where are the keys to my car? Do you have the air tag on your keys? No, I don't have the air tag on my keys. And I remember that as I was getting into the cab, I took all the stuff out of my pants. I opened the top of my roller suitcase. I put everything in there. And then I forgot to close the bag.

No, I forgot to close the bag. And somebody I knew came out of the hotel when I was getting in the car. I don't know how it happened. I don't know why it happened. Something happened, the key fell out. But at this moment, I don't know where it is because I'm pretty sure I put it in the bag

and I have no idea my flight boards in 10 minutes. No, no, no, no, no. I have in 10 minutes my flight boards. So instantaneously, I know I'm fucked. no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, ask you for proof you own the car. I don't know, proof I own the car. I just got back from, I don't know, drivers, I think I mean, proof I own the car is that no one else wants to drive this shitty car. Who else would claim this piece of shit?

So, I'm freaking out, right? I don't know what I'm gonna do. I mean, I'm not really freaking out, like everything's, you know, I'm not in, my life's not in danger, but I'm freaking out like, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I you know, I'm not in my life's not in danger, but I'm freaking out like I'm a bit of your stomach. Yeah, it's like a team. I just went through all this drama. I hate the airport in the first place and there's no two ways about I don't mind Vegas, but I hate that I hate it all. So I'm just I'm just irritated and bothered and there's no the guy

The weed store didn't have any weed so that I'm not relaxed in any way shape or, or form. I'm agitated. Also, I don't really know why. Vegas is very dry. And like, very dry. Like my lips are cracked. My hands are hurting. Yeah, I've only been there for 28 hours. But the thing that's driving me really crazy is it's so dry, but then you get to the airport

and I think they're running humidifiers. Oh, they have to. Yeah, because all the sudden my nose is running like a son of a bitch. I mean, it is just running and I keep going, but you don't want to do that because it's COVID. So I'm just letting it run. So I got this drippy nose

and everybody's kind of like looking at me a little bit weird and I'm like, just going like, I feel like I've been doing Google nine. Chrissy, I swear to God, how could he that anybody have looked at it any other way, except for this guy as high as fuck on cocaine? I'm agitated, I'm anxious because I left my keys

in my plane, my nose dripping, the guy at the Centurion Lounge is like, sir, do you need any help? And I wasn't even asking for anybody. I was like, sir, sir, before you get arrested, you wanna stay here and just have a cup of coffee and chill out? Yeah.

Come over here in the pod. I call Delta and I'm gonna tell you something. Delta will never be a direct advertiser on this show. But they are amazing. They are fucking, there is no other airline in the world except for Delta and Air France maybe Virgin I've flown once or twice they're great United whatever American forget about it. Anybody else I don't want to talk about spirits the worst. Oh, yeah

Spirit sucks, but Delta. I call this lady She's I'm like I tell her the situation and she's like, oh, that that's really awful Let me see if I can find a flight. I may help you, but she's like, oh, that's really awful. Let me see if I can find a flight. I may help you. But she's like, oh, there's no flights out tonight. Last one. And I'm like, this isn't really true. Like, there's so many flights out of Vegas.

So I'm like, oh, that really stinks. And she's like, but I'll get you there tomorrow morning. But you're already taking the red eye. I'm already taking the red eye. But she's like, I'll get you out tomorrow morning. And then she goes, wait, I'm looking for today. But after midnight is tomorrow Let me check again. She checks again. She goes I have one seat left on the last flight out at one o'clock in the morning

It's a first-class seat and I'm like I can't charge a first class seat in my like my company credit card That would never fly. Yeah, she goes. I'm gonna wave the upgrade fee. I'm gonna wave the change ticket fee I'm gonna wave the Miss flight fee. No way. I went to Vegas and I won the fucking lottery to get a first class seat. Oh my god back. Back. It was amazing.

It was so nice. I went to Vegas. I didn't win a thing because I didn't gamble a thing. I didn't get any weed because they didn't weed at the weed store. I stayed at the world shittiest cockroach motel called Oh, shagga hands. I didn't get any weed because they named me weed at the weed store. I stayed at the world's shittiest cockroach motel called Oh, Shagga hands. I didn't get any, I didn't have any secrets. What are your keys? How'd you get it?

The hotel, when I called the hotel, it took them 10 minutes to get back on the phone. I was begging them to drive them to me. I'm like, I'll pay somebody right now. Get your shuttle guy. I'll call a taxi. Throw the keys at the taxi driver as he drives by, and just tell him the head to the airport. He did, bing! So, but Oshaga hands, for all the shittiness,

did have really wonderful people that worked there, and the lady on the phone was like, I found your keys, I can have the shuttle driver come. But you're gonna miss your flight, because he's out right now, and he's not gonna be back. I just didn't have enough time. So, what I did, I left the airport, I went all the way back to Oshaga hands.

I had enough time to grab my keys, go upstairs, lay down for 30 minutes, drive back and on the first pass flight, and guess what, I slept almost the entire way. I bet. Which is weird, because this is the only flight. Were you on the window I was in the window. I was at the bulkhead. I was seat F in row one first one on first one off

It was wonderful The only thing that sucked about the flight is it was the strangest flight I've ever been on and I'll tell you what you think I you're up front. Oh, yeah, thank God. I didn't have to sit with the common people back there all the smells and Jen pop yeah in their discover cards and prepaid debit cards. I don't want anything to do with that. Prepaid phones. Prepaid phones. Pions. When the flight was about to board, the captain came out and the captain said, he goes like this. He said, I don't make this announcement often, but I'm going to make it today just like your parents used to say, if you have to go to the bathroom, if you think you have to go to the bathroom,

if you may in the future have to go to the bathroom, and even if you don't have to go to the bathroom, go to the bathroom now. Really? There's a chance I may have to lock down this flight from any movement. Chrissy, it was the craziest turbulence I've ever, the entire flight. That's the same thing he just came back from Memphis. It has to do with the crazy heating of the earth. Yeah, the weather pattern, the heating of the earth and the updrafts and the down drafts. Yeah, that was crazy. There was not a moment of stillness.

I slept on and off, but I slept a lot of the flight. And it was the most turbulent flight I've ever been. I was trying to. Are you waiting on the person next? No, I was. Luckily I was in first class. I didn't lean on anybody. I had plenty of room. And the guy next to me, he was one of those guys. He was on top. Now, he took a whole gallon of sanitizer and ported all over the seat. And he had the big mask on. I said, hi to him. He didn't even say hi back. He was doing this. I was a whole thing. But I was trying to change the channel. And I couldn't change the channel because my hand

was shaking so bad because of the turbulence. I could not change the channel on the TV in front of me because of the turbine. That's how bad it was. The entire flight locked down. No bathrooms. No flight attendants. No car service. But I was in first class. And you know what? From Oshaga hands. service class, but I was in first class. And you know what? From Oshaga hands to a first class, wasn't bad day with the office. Ain't bad. I didn't lose in Vegas. It's put it that way. I didn't lose any money. All I lost was my made it out. I made it out a lot. Yeah, no Bob and Tom on this flight. flight, probably still at that sports book. They probably still are. I also noticed just as a side note, and this has nothing to do with anything, but I just

noticed there were no rings on either of those fingers. No. No, probably not marriage material. At 56 years old, and can't even miss you miss three belt loops. And you're the sports book. You're not even not only are you at the sports book, you're at Oshaga hands. The bat specifically that one. If you would have been at the win, you go to the win, there's guys in 12 p suits, you

know, betting $10,000. You go to Oshaga hands, you put a dollar down on Duke. They run the gong. Yeah. Bang! We got one. Yeah, 150 cents Free dinner at Perionis Guiante classical for everybody

All right, tcbpodcast.com the brand new tcbpodcast.com go there all the audio all the video contact us Let us know if you have any comments questions concerns or content ideas We love to take them and we'll never spam you. We will never sell your email addresses until someone pays us enough money. And if you'd like to, 855, TCB8383, 1, 855, TCB8383 send us a text message. We respond directly to you because we love you. And we love you go to Instagram at the commercial break.

Tick Tok is a tcb live please go to youtube.com slash the commercial break full episodes the same day they air here on the audio feed air on the pod on the youtube feed we would love it if you would go there and subscribe to the channel like and comment on your favorite videos a lot of people tell me it's they much prefer to watch us then just to listen to it. I'm surprised they prefer to do anything with us but we'll take it. Yes.

If it gets us another listener, we'll take it. And we wanted to let you know from the bottom of our hearts, we love you. We love you. Even if you do stay out of a shag of hands, we still look. All right, Chrissy, I guess, you know, for today at least. That's all we can do. I took up the whole time blabbing about my Vegas trip. I think so. I loved it. I'm sorry. I needed to hear about it. I haven't heard about it.

Now you know. Now I... And knowing is half the battle. Alright, I love you. I love you. Best of you. Best of you. Best of you out there on the podcast universe. Until next time, Chrissy and I always say, we do say in hell we must say. Goodbye! Until next time, Chrissy and I always say, we do say in hell we must say. Good bye!I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human, I'm a human you