The Commercial Break - Gotta Hand It To Tekoki Karaoke!

Episode Date: March 3, 2023

Believe it or not, being able to sing karaoke while receiving a hand job is a talent! They know all about it in Japan, and Bryan gives Krissy the scoop on Tekoki Karaoke. Later, TCB breaks out one of Bryan's old McDonald's training videos. 21 EPMs Everything’s phallic here at TCB! Where in the world is Chopper Johnson? What exactly is Tekoki Karaoke? Bryan wishes we could bring this to the US #ProstateHealth The sanitization standards for a show like this are very confusing If you can’t ask people about their jobs, what is there to talk about? Bryan doesn’t know how to talk about TCB out in the world The Commercial Break or The Crappy Book Club? Bryan was a paranoid stoner! The only hospital to be high at is one with a 24hr McDonalds What makes fast food in the US so bad? The training? The money? The vibes? Bryan shows Krissy one of his old McDonald’s training videos, featuring Michael Jordan ‘The Miseducation of Bryan Green,’ Bryan's upcoming memoir. Nothing like comparing the NBA to working at McDonald's Why not break the fourth wall while we’re at it? Barb…she’s got ideas Just be normal, it's a McDonald's training video! LINKS: Send us show ideas, comments, questions or concerns by texting us or leaving a voicemail at: 1.855.TCB.8383 Speak to TCB LIVE by calling 775.TCB.LIVE (1.775.822.5483) Tuesday-Thursday 12pm-5pm EST Watch TCB on YouTube Creator: Bryan Green Co-Host: Bryan Green Co-Host: Krissy Hoadley Written By: Bryan Green Exec Producers: Bryan Green & Krissy Hoadley Content Production & Research: Tina Khano YouTube Producer & Editor: Morgan Please Audio Editing: Christina A. Executive Director: Astrid B. Associate Producer: Gustavo Episodic Contribution: Marianne, Diane, Natalie, Will The Champ, Will D** Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Welcome to McDonald's, how may I hurt you? How may I hurt you today? Did you say McFlurry? Pfft! Ha ha ha ha! This bitch thinks she's getting ice cream! Holy shit! I'm sorry, our ice cream machines broke in.

On this episode of the commercial break... If you go on a show where you're standing behind a curtain from the waist down the commercial break. What are the girls? I don't a mask. They all don't mask. Well yeah, COVID. The next episode of the commercial break starts now. Ah yeah, Captain kittens, welcome back to the commercial break. I am Brian Green. This is my dear friend and beautiful co-host, Kristen Joy, only best of you, Chris. And that's Steve Ryan. Best of you out there in the podcast universe.

The 21 EPM stickers. Are we? It's all the rage. It's like wildfire, like hotcakes. At least two sightings out in the wild. That's you. It's one of the pictures. I love it.

It's insane. It's insane. So for those of you that don't know, might be new to the show just tuning in or just have no clue what we're talking about. You would be like tuning in or just have no clue what we're talking about. You would be like us. We also have no clue what we're talking about. 21 EPM, 21 ejaculations per month,

was a number noted by a scientific review of prostate cancer and possible preventions for prostate cancer. And one of the things that came out of this huge study that was done for like 10 years was that men that ejaculate more than 21 times per month are decreasing their chances of prostate cancer. That's right. Not by a little, but by a lot. So Chrissy and I are doing, that's right. We're doing our part as good citizens, as good global citizens and just lovers of Seaman in general.

I don't wanna speak for both of us, but I'll speak for both of us here. You're a lover of Jizz, aren't you, Chrissy? I'll let it that for you. And so Chrissy and I had this, we were just out talking about this story. And one of the things that came to my mind during the story is that we should have the. Well, we thought of the marathon. The marathon stickers

that say 26.2 or whatever. I don't even know if that's actually. That is. I have run a half marathon. I've seen those a back and we were like, wait a minute. What if we could get the word out? With the best possible marketing known to man, which is billboards on the side of the road in Iowa, but the second best marketing ploy ever devised. It's a bias. Correct. Are these bumper stickers that we created 21 EPM. Now, the original idea was to put 21 EPM and then have a stick figure with a little bone

to hang it out. Yeah, like the stick family.. But like the stick family. Yeah, like the stick family. One with a bowter. Yeah, no. A stick figure with an extra stick. I think is exactly how it was put. But we went to our attorney and he said probably not.

Don't do that. No. But we did put these 20 when EPM stickers together because we thought it was a good idea. And we started giving them away for free. Well, recently, our first batch went out a couple weeks ago and we write a note back to you. We write a note back. We put the 21 EPM sticker. We sent a bunch of them out. Our first batch went out about a month ago. And then over the last couple of weeks, we started to receive photographs of people that are actually putting these on the back of their It's crazy. It's crazy our good friend in Canada and then someone else wrote in

and then there's a third person who it's just it's lovely if you'd like your 21 EPM sticker you know how to get it's 855 Tcb 8383 855 Tcb 8383 text us with your address and we'll send you a 21 EPM sticker. Here's great. So remember that little band that I was in not not 33 P. That was a different. It's actually called 33 Willie what we call 33 penis around here because everything must revolve around it here at the commercial break. I've got a 13 year old boy. I have to accept it. Thank you, Chrissy. I appreciate it. Good letting that devil on my shoulder at the best of the commercial rig.

When we were starting the band Chopper Johnson. Right another fantastic name. Another fantastic name with clearly a phallic reference, which I didn't even think about when I came up with the name and I didn't even think about it. Let me tell you how excited the guys in the band were when I came up with this name, Chopper Johnson. It was the name of a song that I wrote on the back of a piece of paper. When I was auditioning for them, I was like, er,

chopper, don't end. It a burst of creativity. I had a burst of creativity. What came out of my mouth, Chopper Johnson, a one-armed guitarist. It was a song about a one-armed guitarist who got in fights. That's a bar. Nice. As a producer, one said to me, that's pretty deep, man. Not really. That's a far. Nice. As a producer one said to me,

that's pretty deep, man. Not really. That's what he said. It's pretty deep, not really. He said not really. I didn't. So anyway, so. Is this the same producer that said y'all, no.

No, this isn't work. That wasn't a producer. That was like a manager type. Like now a guy from Rush. Yeah, the guy from Rush. Not the actual guy from Rush, but a guy who worked with Rush. No.

A guy who knew someone in Rush. Yeah, get him, get him, lead him, walk in and go, wow, chopper Johnson, great name, bad song. A style about a dick. So our great idea, once we got chopper Johnson, the name, once we all rallied around that name, in the studio that we had, we were in the top of an office building that one of the guys in the band worked with.

And so the office building had an extra room that they allowed us to turn it to a practice studio. Well, like the supply closet. Kind of. Cool, cool, bigger than the supply closet. We had this 47 channel mixer on this big, like, stand that we, it was just, it was typical garage band bullshit only it was an office building so but at night in order to you know make some marketing materials we would use

the coffee or in the coley or just a case we had these stickers you would put in the printer you know like a sticker piece of paper like a blank piece of paper, like a blank piece of paper. So we started making stickers that said, where in the world is Chopper Johnson? Do you remember where in the world is David? This is Wall-O. No. Who's that guy? Where in the world is? Carmen San Diego?

No, remember the atlas. Oh, where in the world is like the Atlas shrugged? No. You don't remember? Okay. Anyway. So we put these stickers together, where in the world is Chopper Johnson? And they were like this big, they were like an inch tall

and seven inches across. You couldn't see these things. If you had a telescope and you were standing four feet from it, you couldn't read the writing. It was that small, but we thought it was the coolest thing. So we'd go to Taco Bell and we'd like put the sticker on the drive through window. On the drive through window?

I thought you were gonna sing other people's cars. No, we would never put them on people's cars But we were putting them everywhere else. We were putting them on salt lamp posts, and no one fucked First of all we didn't have a website because there weren't even websites back then I don't think what second of all how are you gonna figure out who chaper Johnson is by putting a sticker up that says Where in the world is shopper Johnson? I think you were good creating buzz. I thought it was crazy. I thought it was crazy buzz. Yes. I certainly was creating buzz. It's the old talko bell, but just stone people like, chopper Johnson, is that about

a dick? So, so this is our grand strategy right now. Our grand marketing plan is to give you the stickers you can put on the back of your car. And if someone has trifocals on, they'll be able to read that it's from the commercial. Yeah, it's pretty large. Well, yeah, 21 EPM is pretty large, but the commercial break, not so much.

No. No, it's a design flaw in that sticker. That's okay. It does say best to you at the top. It does say best to you. So if you want your 21 EPM sticker, you know where to get them. Speaking of 21 EPMs a month, Chrissy,

I recently, do you know what the word Tikoki stands for? I do not. Tikoki is a Japanese word, and I'm probably butchering it. It's Tikoki or Tikoki. Tikoki or Tikoki in Japanese means, of course. Hand job. Of course. Of course, because that's the first Japanese word you want.

It's Tikoki. I saw on Instagram the other day, I'm flipping through, and I look, and it's one of those Japanese game shows. And the guy is singing a song, like a Celine Dion song, you know. Nia, for whatever you are, he's singing it in broken English. Okay. He's singing this, but he's making all these weird faces. He's like, oh, no, ah, ah, ah!

It looks like he's like getting electrocuted or getting whacked off. Oh, good. One of the two. The reveal 20 seconds later is he's getting whacked off. That is why he's doing karaoke. That is crazy. It's called Takoki karaoke. And it's a program on Japanese television is fucking wild. And I love it.

I wish instead of TLC we had Tukoki karaoke because I would be so happy about this. It is a game show where literally girls, ladies, who apparently are professional Tukoki artists, whatever that is, like you're a sexual healer of whatever you want to say sex work and their job in this particular game show situation is to make the man climax to the climax of the song and if you can do that then you get points and everybody wins and i don't know what you win a handful of fast lane i'm not even sure how that works.

But this is fucking wild. Wild. That's crazy. And why do we not have this kind of programming in the United States? How is it that Mori fucking povich is still on air, but we don't have kakioki. Why don't we have tekioki kakioki?

We need it. We absolutely need it. And I thought about for like two seconds that we should do this here at the commercial break, but then if they're not gonna let us have a stick figure on the lawyers, say no to the stick figure on the bumper sticker, I'm sure Kakioki is way. Yeah, no it's out.

But wouldn't that be awesome? Right. Yeah. There was a television show here that did the exact same thing. One of the other things that they were showing. So it looks like... Like the sanitaryness of this whole organization needs to get the extra mile. Let me...

That's me. Probably just works something out here and our heads together. I'm going to think for the both of us. If you go on a show where you're standing behind a curtain from the waist down and someone on the other side of the curtain is whacking you off while you sing a Celine Dion song to 750,000 people on the other side of a live broadcast, sanitation is probably the least of your concerns. But I thought, if you were showing me one of the girls had on a mask

They don't match well. Yeah, COVID Okay, all right, I'm just gonna roll it on That's crazy. Oh hold on before we get started All right, definitely want everyone around me to wear a mask I definitely want everyone around me to wear a mask. She whackered you off with her toes. What are you doing? I can't believe I have this. How do you ever get a, now I understand like the culture there is different.

And I think these game shows have a long history of being wild and insane. Wacky. Yeah, wild and wacky. And I think in a lot of ways, it's considered family entertainment. How I don't know, but they also sell panties on streets, and vending machines. That's true. So.

But. Maybe it's kind of like, you know, that's more part of the culture, just like, you know, having wine with dinner and. Having wine with dinner, a stranger wacky off like, seeing your favorite Disney song. Yeah, you know, that's not an hour culture but no I don't see a lot of hand jobs going on am I local karaoke you gotta get your your monthly number you do so they're doing their part as well take you okay karaoke that's all I gotta say frost a hashtag prostate if you go on one of these shows, yeah, I'm gonna hashtag Frosty.

I'll show you that's the reason for going on the show. If you're a guy and you're thinking about doing this, like you're a Japanese man, you're a work and guy, you got a family, you got friends, what? How do you get treated after you go on takey-o-key karaoke? Is it like, oh my God, you are on takey-o-key karaoke? Or is it like, holy shit dude, you are on take karaoke karaoke or is it like holy shit dude? You want to take

karaoke karaoke? Well, I think it depends on if you win or not. If you win, everybody's like, yeah, but if you lost, then you think the embarrassment largely depends on how many points you get, whether or not you actually, at that point, I mean, if you're there, you might as well go to win. If I'm there, I'm jizzin' right at, you know, wherever you are. Let it go. Let it go. What was your 33-willy song? Eggs about eggs are what's this sunny side of? It's not exciting. Sunny side! Ah! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha I work it on superpose that bastard. Oh, Astrid. Lucky Astrid's still in the same house with me.

This stupid show. Commercial being on the commercial break is a lot like being on an episode of Take Yokey Carrying. You know what I'm saying? It's just depends on who's looking at you. I mean, I went to the I'm not going to mention where I went. But I went somewhere and it's couples.

I introduced myself, Guy asks, what do you do? I'd say I'm in the podcast industry. What podcast? Oh, yeah, you can go. What do you do in the podcast industry? I'm still trying to figure out exactly crafting my elevator. How do you, yeah, what is this? What is the follow up to that?

It is so very difficult, so very difficult. Depending on who it is, I will say stranger. Yeah, I mean, depending on if I think they're cool. I guess that's true, but if I don't think they're cool or they're, it's not because it is not for everyone. It's not for everyone. If I see, I think I'm going to maybe start saying it's, and just it's the comedy genre I I'll work in the whole thing. Yeah, I do all of it.

I'm just, I'm just, I can't figure it out. I can't figure it out. I can't figure it out. I can't figure it out. I can't figure it out. I can't figure it out. So he goes,

what do you do? Podcast industry. Oh, what are you doing? The podcast industry. I had the way I was reading, I'm not to interrupt you, sorry, but I was reading the other day in an etiquette little article that I read. It's actually rude, consider rude not to ask somebody

what they do, like at a party or something. Consider rude not to ask. No, to ask. To ask them what they do. Yeah. Why? Because you're making an assumption that they have a job. Whatever. Yeah. It's just so fractured down. So what the fuck? Whatever the place. Really? what is left to ask? I can cut. I don't know. I can cut.

Oh, did you hear the dicks of grown 30? How much is your dick grown in the last decade? I mean, what are you supposed to ask? Well, it would prevent these types of situations. So what did happen? Go back to your podcast industry. Oh, what are you doing the podcast industry? I sell advertisements.

Oh, okay. For, for which podcast? Right. Comedy. I'm stuck right there. Yeah. Comedy. It's a network of comedies. Yeah. It's, um, you know, we have over 200 people watching every single episode. I'm a standup comedian that does standup comedy podcasts. According to some, I don't know this, but then Astrid goes,

oh, he has a podcast that's called The Commercial Break. And I'm like, Astrid's so proud. Oh, she's like, why, why do you do this? Why do you not just say you have a podcast that's called The Commercial Break? I don't know how people are gonna react to that.

She goes, if they've never heard it, they're not gonna react like anything. They don't even know what it is. No, most people have not heard it. No, no one I've ever done. No one's ever, I've never met me. I're not going to react like anything. They don't even know what it is. Most people have not heard no, no, no one I've ever done. I've never met me. I've met three people, strangers that have heard it. If they go listen to it later, then yeah, that's my concern is I really don't want them listening. I'm embarrassed of my own show. That's the truth. I'm not, I'm not embarrassed of it at all. Not in the least. Not in the least. We certainly

have an audience and love the audience. And we're all in on the joke together, right? Yeah. With the people in the know. That's right. Everyone who's listening is in on the joke. But like my mother-in-law is not in it. I don't want her to be a part of it.

You're near. She tells it all. A-P-M-S-A-P-M-S-D-O-K. You don't want your mom. You don't want us to send your mother-in-law to 21 EPM sticker just for Chits and Giggles. Does she even know the name of the podcast? I don't know. Does Jeff ever mention it?

I don't know. Would Jeff be embarrassed to mention it? No. Would he be like, hey, Chrissy's got this great podcast. He does. He does. He does, he tells everybody. Okay.

Yeah, why are our spouses more proud of the show than we are? That's what it's up. I swear to God. Okay, yeah, why are our spouses more proud of the show than we are? I swear to God, I have this little bit of imposter syndrome when it comes to the commercial break and not not like I shouldn't be on the commercial break. Of course, I should be on the commercial break. It's just bad enough for me to be out, right? But maybe just some of our subjects can be a little... Yeah, when you're talking about ghost fuckers and, you know,

budget. We think it's funny. Harry red necks running around chasing fictitious monsters. We think it's funny. It's our brand of humor, but it's not everybody's brand of humor. It's not forever. And I think that's, I think I get two things, right?

One, I can't believe that anybody listens to the show. So when I look at numbers or someone gives us an accolade or I'm like, oh my God, I have, it doesn't register at all, doesn't register. It's like bounces right off. I'm still that guy sitting in front of a computer, watching Chrissy on the bad Zoom phone call with my shitty or microphone, right?

I'm still doing this to just one person, and that's Chrissy Hode. Number one. I feel the same way. Number two, I just don't know how to tell people about the commercial break, what it is, without a great deal of embarrassment. Like, I'm just like, I don't know what else to say. So I eventually, so Astrid goes, ah, the commercial break, blah, blah, blah. Well, because it would be different if you met somebody at a party and they, and you said,

you were able to say we analyze, you know, the classic, the classic books of the class of three. We take a great literature from the sixteenth century, and we dissected the page by a page. We take all the classics, take Yoki, carry Yoki. See, that sounds really boring to me, and I probably would never go to listen to that podcast that we need to find something that's super boring. Yeah. The people are like, oh, cool. You're right. But they're not going to go listen to it. Because it's going to be boring. You You know Oprah's book club without Oprah, just like that, just like that.

It's super soul Sunday, only not on Sundays and without the soul. T.C. book club. GC book club, yep. The crappy book club. GCB, that's what it stands for. The crappy book club. I think this is it, We've hit upon it.

I think we've got it because the other thing to say is, you know, hey, I'm on the commercial break and we talk a lot about Giz. Yeah. Yes. Have you had your fill of Giz talk this month? No. It's not. Yeah.

Or like one of the reviews said, you need to talk about cocaine and jizz just turn into the commercial break. And then by the way, every time I've re-listened to a show, we're talking about jizz or cocaine. Exactly. That's just like we started this episode. I think that's it. You know, so, but I look at other guys and girls. I was over at a whatever and I'm talking to a gentleman

and really nice guy and he says, what do you do? And I said, oh, I got a podcast. Oh, great, what is it? The commercial break. I felt comfortable. He's young, exactly in a hip cool, whatever. I felt like it was, I was in a place. That's what I'm saying.

It depends on who you talk to. Yeah, I felt like I was in the tree of trust, the safe space and all that. And so what do you do? And he goes, oh, I got a, or the guy next to him says, oh, he's got a very popular YouTube channel. He gets like 650,000 views per episode.

He says that about you? No, he said that to the about this other guy. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, I wish. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. Unfortunately, anybody who introduces me gets it wrong on the bad side. They're not like, oh, Brian gets 250 million downloads per episode.

It's like, if this is Brian, he's the co-host of the commercial breaks. It's a podcast on YouTube. Did you can find on Spotify and stream it right through Amazon books? They have over 20 downloads per episode. They're doing great. On your Kindle. It's on your Kindle. What are you, my mom? You can't.

You're at a podcast conference. You can't even know you don't even know what a podcast is. So anyway, so guys says, oh, he's got 250,000 per feed per, you know, and this is the guy that you were just talking to. Yes, there's like three of us in the room. We're like great. Yeah, I was like, great. My dick did not grow by 30% just sharing that with you. So I was like, wow, dude, that's really good.

He's like, yeah, yeah, yeah, you know, it's good. And I'm like, so what exactly, what's the topic? What are you doing? He's like, oh, I talked to porn stars about how they like to be fucked. And I's like, yeah, yeah, yeah, you know, it's good. And I'm like, so what exactly, what's the topic? What are you doing? He's like, oh, I talked to porn stars about how they like to be fucked. And I was like, why can't I have that kind of gusto when I talk about the commercial break? Well, in there we should not.

I know. We should never be in betterest again, because just remember, but then again, when you have 650,000 views, it's like a legitimate business. You can't quantify the commercial break. We have three million downloads per month. Yeah? Is that like a legitimate business. You can't quantify the commercial rate. No. We have three million downloads per month. Yeah? Is that like a play?

Is that like a, how do you tune that in? Yeah. Ever change of our audience is 72. I see a lot of AOL addresses and MSN addresses coming through guys. It's all I got to say, okay? All right. I can't believe it was so wrong. We're all in the same place.

Yeah. You know, way back, way back, when I had the baby, when we were just starting, ending season three, starting season number four, when I had the baby, one of the things that I wanted to share with you, which leads into a larger discussion,

is that you know that hospital here in Atlanta, that north side hospital Yes, you know that they still have a fucking 24 hour McDonald's Wow in that north side hospital Isn't that insane? Yeah, doesn't that seem insane to you? That was a Chick-fil-A you know the hospital down near me. There was a Chick-fil-A in the hospital Yeah, I don't know 24 hours though. Well, yeah,'t know. I don't know. I don't know. I think 24 hours on certain days and I, it also is the busiest birthing hospital in the world.

Right. You gotta get your fix. Yeah, you gotta get your fix. But one of the things, and I've been going to Northside Hospital since I was a child. We all, if you live in a land zone. That's a good one. Since I was born. I was born in Chicago.

Okay. But pretty close after that. Since the first time that I showed up at my dad's house, high as fuck on weed that had been laced, and I was having a full-blown panic attack. And here's, I get high, I smoke a little weed, right? In like 15 minutes later, I am way out of it. Like not the regular kind of out it, way out of it.

Wow, okay. And I'm sitting on a couch, there's a bunch of other people at a house that I'm familiar with and some people that I'm familiar with. And a guy that I know looks over, I mean, he goes, you okay, man? And I was like, I don't know, I'm feeling kind of fucked up.

And he says to me, you don't look good. Yeah. Maybe you need to stand up and take a walk. Like go outside and get some fresh air. And I had never heard this before when I was high. Never heard someone concerned for how I look after I'd gotten high. Right.

Which, telling somebody, Which baits you have to work in so? Telling somebody that you look fucked up and weird does not help your anxiety when you're fucked up and weird. No. So I'm like all of a sudden now I'm really twisted because now, not only do I feel like I've never felt before but this guy just told me I look like I've never heard before.

I can confirm that. I can confirm that. My internal paranoia has now gone ex- Right, because usually you can kind of talk to yourself and be like, it's just me, it's just me, that's fine. You're always like this Brian. He said, yeah, you're always like this Brian. You're always weird this Brian. He said yeah, you're always like this Brian. You're always weird like this when you get high. Don't worry. It's cool Brian. You're always weird when

you're high. No one likes you when you're high. Hey bro, you're looking a little weird man You're dying you're dying are you still breathing? Of course I am I'm about to shut up in a voice of course. I'm still breathing. Hey, dude. Are you still breathing? You're not breathing You know that voice. Yeah So I convinced one of the people there that they need to take me home to my house. Where are my parents? Look, at the time, my mom was gone, my dad's there, house is dark. It's like one 30 in the morning.

And I am so fucked up that I cannot seem to get the key out of my pocket, my house key, which by the way was on a chain. It was on a chain. That's attached to your face. It's on the chain. You're losing it. You don't even know how to move your arms anymore.

Shut up, I know how to move my arms. Hey dude, are you able to move your arms? I told you, you can't move your arms. So I can't get the key in, so I ring the doorbell. And I lay on the front porch I just lay down because I'm lay down dude. You're so fucked up You're gonna fall off the porch lay down shut up. I'm just fine Sun why are you laying on the ground? I told you you're laying on the ground

You're poor dad. I know I'm sorry This is my dad Opens the door, you know in in his sleeping briefs or whatever, sleeping briefs. The good old baggy box. That's right, the baggy ball boxers, which by the way, sleeping briefs and awake briefs are the same, I think. But anyway, what are I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I And I'm like, dad, I think I'm dying. He's like, you're not dying, you're high.

All right. I'm taking you to the hospital. I'm dropping you off. He literally drove me to the hospital and dropped me off to the hospital. Were they determined quickly that all I needed was a shot of Xanax? It's sleeping off, right?

And my dad made me sign my own paperwork on that one. He was like, no, you're paying for this. I'm not paying for it. My very first lesson in how hospital billing works. Yes, sure. They will come after you forever. Right. Signed someone else's name, man. They're going to come after you forever. But I just remember that as soon as I woke up out of that, I didn't, I don't have a cell phone. I probably have a beeper, some phager or something,

but I don't have a cell phone. In the hospital. Yeah, and I am hungo-read, and I'm happy that I'm at Northside Hospital because I know that there is a McDonald's, a couple steps down the way. Which surprises me. Nutritionist good food right up here,

body meat, fried after. Nothing's, yeah, nothing screams hospital hospital food like a double bubble bacon burger I think of milkshakes a large X large fry They are just keeping that customer conveyor belt rolling right that go in ones that one end they come out the other No green juice here. No, no forget about that So we go to the McDonald's there has got to be the best McDonald's that still exists. Okay. And I think part of the reason why is because it's at a hospital, it's very, you know, there's a lot of people that go in and on to their the franchisee, whoever that is, that owns that McDonald's probably makes

hand over fist bank because nothing. McDonald's owners are very wealthy. A lot of them. Of course they are. McDonald's, anybody who owns those kind of franchises, unless you have a really bad location for some reason, you're a millionaire. But McDonald's does all the work for you on that location. Thank you, remember Mr. Franchise?

Yeah, Mr. Franchise. Frankie, franchise. Yeah, Mr. Franchise. Frankie, it's me, Mr. Franchise. This one's better. Don't worry about those other. I can't even do it without laughing. Don't worry about that. All those marketing dollars and all those millions of Billions of dollars and revenue go with Frankie B. You'll lose 350,000 right off the bat Yeah, Frankie wanted to have our good friend Frankie is into the franchise

He's into the franchise mouth. Yeah, but it's I say franchise loosely Yeah, he's he's at the head. He's at the franchise mall business. Yeah, but it's I say franchise loosely Yeah, he's he's at the head. He's at the top of it He's at the top of it and there's no one below him. Yeah, he's trying to recruit people however his so long sweet That he was proposing in one video was out in the middle of nowhere Right, Chrissy Why bother with a company that has millions of locations and experience when you can get Frankie with his one location inside the coat closet and hook brick Illinois. He's got years of experience he created the franchise model.

He's Frankie B. You'll get all the support in the world as long as Frankie answers the phone. But he won't. Why? Because you just gave him $350,000. He's running down to my orca. What you'll be here standing, waiting for your franchise to be built. Oh, yeah, those, the, anyway, they do all the work.

They do all the work. And then you know what I heard too, is that I think this is correct, is the Burger King or other fast-who places come in and go right next to McDonald's. Of course they do. McDonald's in all the work. Yeah. And the big rock set on that.

High traffic areas. High traffic is right. That traffic is all high. Ha ha ha. Ta ta ta ta ta ta ta ta ta ta ta ta ta ta ta ta ta ta. You know that Burger King song? There's a whole article written about how it's what's called an ear wig. It gets in your ear and you can't get rid of it.

Ear worm. Ear worm, ear wig, whatever it's called. BK, have it your way. Sent $500 to the commercial break. Thanks, Burger King. So this is like a really well-run McDonald's. But even the best run McDonald's in my opinion now is crap. Like I remember when I worked there many many many years ago and I don't mean to sound like that old

grandpa that I worked there. I had to walk to work. I walked to work. Mainly because I didn't have a car. But even if I did I still want to walk to work. When I worked in McDonald's, you could have sex in the break room. The quality of food, in my opinion, in my personal opinion, fast food in this country, and I bend to a lot of fast food outlets around this country, like everybody has is just atrocious. And the service is even worse.

Have you met any I mean and I'm saying this like not as a generalization. I'm saying this because I think there's a lot of reasons why fast food has gotten so bad. I think one of the reasons is the pay when you pay, and they have to work seven other jobs to make a living when they can't feed their family when they're living in their cars. You know, there are Disney world employees that are living in their cars

because they can't afford to live in Orlando right now. How do you live in Atlanta on $7.95 an hour? You cannot do that. And so when you go to the drive-through window and you ask for your fucking quarter pounder with cheese without pickles and it comes with extra pickles on it You know what those people don't give a shit because they don't get paid enough to give a shit And I almost don't blame them. It's almost like well. I mean, that's what I get for

supporting the corporation that's paying these people Pentons to serve my fucking food something I'm gonna put down my throat when I Worked at McDonald's, there was like a whole different standard, right? Working at McDonald's wasn't a source of pride, right? It wasn't like, yeah, I work at McDonald's, it's kinda like the commercial break. I didn't go and announce that I worked at McDonald's.

But at the same time, there were people there in the middle-aged people who were either managers or girl people or whatever that lived off of the money that they made at the McDonald's. They worked five days, six days a week, and they did what they did, and they got paid enough to live. And they had families and they supported those families. It was a living wage at that point.

Now there's not a living wage. So we are asking people to give a shit when it's obvious, not that we don't give a shit, but that no one else gives a shit about them, because all they care about is the almighty dollar, and making sure that your burger gets microwaved fast enough. It's all so shit, and I wish that it wasn't like that. You know, the only restaurant that makes a difference,

that the only restaurant that you can ever go to anymore, and get somebody that cares, Chick-fil-A. Chick-fil-A, and know. Chick-fil-A. And I hate their politics, but their fucking chicken is good, man. It is. Fucking chicken is good. And a waffle fries. So I thought to myself, I wonder if they're being trained the same way that I was trained,

because when I was trained at the McDonald's, it was like you really did take pride. Take pride, right? Even, and I didn't take pride in cleaning the fucking diarrhea off the back of a wall. Like I didn't take pride in that. I wasn't like I was happy about it. It was part of the job. But at the same time, like if someone walked in,

I greeted them. I said hello, I, you know, welcome them. My son, my kids and I, my twin brother went to Chuckie Cheese two days ago. Oh God. You? Oh my God, I haven't been there forever. Chrissy, I don't even know what a Chuckie Cheese is anymore. Oh God. You? Oh my God. I haven't been there for ever. Chrissy. I don't even know what a Chuck E. Cheese is anymore.

That all. No. Dancing animated machines. No, they don't. They have a fucking large TV that shows Chuck E. Cheese singing a song. That's not the same. And every hour on the hour, Chuck E. Cheese comes out and it's obviously the manager because he's wearing the same clothes from the head down and he goes like this and the kids run up and listen, my daughter loved it. She loved to have, you know, oh, Chucky Cheese, my son is terrified. But there are 50 video games in there, all of which are broken, none of which work. They charge you $30 and then no one and I mean, you know, the pizza is delicious.

Oh, it's delicious. Oh, the pizza is fucking delicious. There are fan clubs around Jackie cheese pizza It is but as microwave pizza they just put in the microphone. What do they do? My point is is that these kids that work there They don't give a show. No, they don't we want it does look you know we get the little tokens in the tickets when you do the little ski ball in that shit. I said my son just he wants a little racer Hey, whatever of course. That's what you go there for you want to get that present that prize at the tickets when you do the little ski ball in that shit. I said, my son just, he wants a little racer head. Whatever. That's that. Of course, that's what you go there for.

You want to get that present, that prize at the end, because you know, you've been like, play good games. I just paid $30 for this stupid card that doesn't work in a half the games. I want at least get my son a pencil eraser or something. Yes. It took 15 minutes for anybody to care. I look over and the manager is making TikTok videos sitting and drinking a soda. And they're making a TikTok video with me.

They're like pointing at me. And so I start going like this. I'm like, hey dude, good. I hate to interrupt your TikTok live. But, you know, and he's probably going, uh oh, white guy about to go crazy. Exactly. We got a shooter in the building.

You know, I know I'm very well aware that I would like to say something to this kid, but I can't because he's probably got me on TikTok live. And they're going to connect the fact that I wear it on the commercial break and the whole world's going to hate me. So my point is, is it the training or is it the money or is it the attitude generally that everyone in the world has these days? I think that all has to come together. All comes together.

Training money and the attitude. Do you want to look and see what kind of training I got at McDonald's? Do you want to watch one of the videos that I had to watch as a trainee at McDonald's? Yes, I like it. Let's do that. I was throwing on the internet. As you do. As I do like to do. T-C-B

Hey everybody out there in the podcast universe, it's time for the dreaded commercial break inside the commercial break. It's season number four. You've heard it all before, so let's get to it quickly. You can text us or leave us a voicemail at 1-855-TCB-8383. Questions, comments, concerns, or content ideas send them to 855-TCB-8383 toll free from anywhere in the world. Visit our website tcbpodcast.com to listen to any of the audio, watch any of the video, or send us a message, hit the contact us button.

Instagram and TikTok at the commercial break. And now YouTube videos the same day they air on the audio feed, they'll air youtube.com slash the commercial break. Chrissy and I are very grateful every time you choose to listen to the commercial break. If you're ever in the market for our sponsors, products or services, all we ask is that you use the specialized URLs or codes. Thanks again for being part of the TCB family. Now let's hear from those sponsors and we'll be back to this episode of the commercial break.

TCB We're going to take a little reminisce about Brian's first job as a proud, fried cook and shit cleaner. And that's what I did. I stood at the fried basket. From the ship to the fryer. Yeah, my first job was, my first job was like cleaning up the lobby on Saturdays and Sundays, because it was a part-time job.

I was 14 years old. My dad had to sign and he had to get a work permit. And so my first job was cleaning up ash trays, trash, making sure that the, take out the bags, put them on the bag. And someone needs an extra box of frauds. Yeah do whatever. I was so scared of it. I mean I was just like scared of people scared of everything But you know these videos gave me out of the nest and into the world it sure did I was working full time with McDonalds within six months. I

Loved it so much because the McDonalds gave me inroads into the very adult world of drugs, alcohol, and sex. The miseducation of Brian Green. It should be a book where I'm like half naked on the front cover with a little loin cloth. The miseducation. The misspent youth of Brian Green, ashing into a tin ash tray.

Everyone McDonald's used to have like those, I don't know, like styrofoam cups that they used to put the coax in. They come in sleeves, you call them a sleeve. And go get it. Go get it. Go get six sleeves of medium cups. You know, maybe I should just put one of those sleeves down near my balls with an ash tray. Couple of lines of coke on the plastic tray.

That's, that's right. That's right. Super size, that shit. You better super size that. Oh, I like that. Mm-hmm. I was working in McDonald's in the age of super size me. Oh yeah. Yeah, super size it.

You had to ask that question every time somebody orders something. You want a super size hat? You want to get extra fat? You want to die quicker? You look pretty miserable with those children in tow. You want to die a little quicker? Yes. All right.

Here's a training video from the years, from around the time when I worked at McDonald's. It's going to start off with just to let you know this is the voice of Michael Jordan. Hi, I've got something very new and special that I really like for you to see. It's called Takeoki Kakioki. This was definitely part of some kind of endorsement deal that he had. Oh yeah. Yeah, I was like, you have to be a part of the trading videos for my titles. Hey, hey, it's like you see this agent calling them right now.

Hey, I'm gonna need you in town. I'm gonna need you in Chicago for like two days. Well, why? You're gonna do some training videos for McDonald's. Training videos for McDonald's. It's part of your $100 million endorsement deal. I'll actually go work at McDonald's if you want me to. Exactly.

A video about satisfying the customer called doing whatever it takes. Now you're probably wondering what does Michael Jordan know about satisfying the customer. Well let me tell you, when I step on to the basketball court, those 18,000 screaming people aren't just fans. They are my customers. They want to see more than just the basketball game. They expect to see a show. No matter what kind of day I've had, when I put on that uniform, my customers, they want to see more than just a basketball game. They expect to see a show.

No matter what kind of day I've had, when I put on that uniform, my customers expect behind the backpasses, long three-porners or great slam dunkes. It's my job to deliver it, and I love it. When you put on that. So similar to McDonald's. Yes, it's very, the parallels are.

As a guy, as a kid from Chicago, that really idolized the bulls and Michael Jordan and the Cubs and all that other stuff. This probably would have meant something to my 14 year old brain. I would have been like, this is just a stepping stone. On your way to Fame, Brian,

you soon you'll be in a band and everyone will love you. It'll be called 33 Penis. Don't worry about the job. I just the other thing about my job in McDonald's is I felt like I was giving up my dreams to be a rock star out in LA when I got my job in McDonald's because I felt like all this extra time I could be practicing guitar. Your McDonald's uniform, your customers want more than just quick service with their smile.

They expect to be treated as a guest in your home and if you hadn't had the greatest of days, accept the you to put on a show and do whatever it takes to satisfy your customer. Including a little taekyoki. Do whatever it takes. The video you're about to see will show you the difference between good service and great personalized service. We all must give our customers. And it will take you behind scenes to show you how your video is actually made. So let's see what it means to satisfy your conscience. Behind the scenes of how the training videos are actually made.

One of the things that you go on Netflix and it says number one in the United States today behind the scenes McDonald's training videos. Alright, do whatever it takes. Thanks Michael. This is when it gets really meta. So let me explain, I'm gonna tee this up a little bit because I've seen a little bit. Okay.

This is so hard to explain, but what's going on is we're not gonna be taken into a world where they are creating a training video for McDonald's, but they're gonna break the fourth wall. It's essentially, just listen, you'll get it. Okay. I hope. I'm gonna be a explanation. Thanks, Chrissy. You get it. I hope. I'm gonna explain. Thanks, Chrissy.

You're like, hold on, I'm gonna explain. Hold on, I'm gonna explain. Tell me like me trying to explain it. I can't explain it. I'm trying to tell people what I do for a living. Well, you're gonna see that I break the fourth wall with a lot of jizz and cocaine. Just listen. Drawling, Everybody set? Slate, please. Dali.

And action. Okay, so they're out of they're out of McDonald's. They're at the front counter. There's a very nicely dressed Just a guy buying the counter with a tie on That hat. Thank you come again with the tie on the hat. Thank you come again. Hi how can I help you? Whoa cut hold it. Whoa that's not the line. The line is hello may I help you let's do it again let's take it from the top Excuse me Gem come on. That's a wrong line help me out here. You're supposed to say help me out here I know we're up doing bumps all night long We've had a little bit too much of the chush chush you know, I'm talking about it. Help me out here, bro The quicker you read the line right the quicker we can get back then

prostitutes of cocaine Here you read the line right, the quicker we can get back then. Brostitudes and co-kay. This guy is like, the actor playing the director. It's such a cliche of a director. Hello, welcome to McDonald's. May I take your order, please? That's the way you always say it. Dave, sorry, but that's my fault. Dave, that's my fault. Dave, that's my fault. You're an asshole and I decided to rewrite all of this. I love this. Well, I was talking to Gem a little bit

earlier and he said that he was feeling really stiff having to say welcome to McDonald's, welcome to McDonald's over and over again. So I gave him a little tiki-o-ki-a. Get him loose and down. So I told him what we tell our people all the time. Say what feels natural, but say it with a warm, sincere smile. I thought it was great. Well, you're the real manager here, Barb, you should know. I'm just not used to letting the actors change the lines.

Oh, I am. I mean, they're playing me all this money. It's a regular. I did direct ghost boobs part two. I don't know if you saw that. It's great to video. Maramax. All right, Barb, it's up to you. You are a woman. And I am used to getting my way. So whatever you say, stand. Believe me. I used to be the same way when it came to letting the crew people think for themselves. Say everybody, take a quick break, okay? What do you mean? We need to have a side conversation about this bar.

Everybody, take 30. Did you notice that when they're having this conversation, which is completely inconsequential, there's like a hundred people behind them all listening intently. Wow, Barb had a really good idea. She literally changed the sentence from, hi, may I take your order to, hi, may I help you? It's brilliant. That Barb, she's going places.

Look out for that Barb. She's a shooting star. She's a master. What if Michael Jordan just like came fly and knocked everybody over like with a mask of all that yeah scooped up bar you got front row tickets to tonight's game bar you know we have our operations and training manual yeah well it's kind of like a script it sure it tells us how to do things the right way at McDonald's well I used to insist that

all of my team do everything strictly by the book. I mean, everything from the way they greeted the customer to how they took the order and so on. But then a lot of people started not showing up to works. So I let them do what they want to do. Started to notice that everybody seemed a little stiff. I mean, really inflexible in the way they were serving the customers

and the customers weren't particularly responsive either. So, I know I have robots taking our own, literally. Yeah, that's right. Look at the director, he's so concerned. Are you talking to me, Barb? Wow. There are ideas. Yeah, I'm dreaming about Jason over here.

We were out there last night, giving each other take yogis. They're acting like they're at a board room. Yeah, they're having a board room conversation about changing the training manuals. Bob just wants to do the commercial and go on. Yeah, I needed to talk about this. Right Lisa, you were part of a team. Well, yeah, yeah, we kicked it around and everybody agreed.

We just didn't feel natural constantly repeating the same thing to me. You're right, I did it to me. He kicked it around. We kicked it around. Hey, Barb. Hey, Tammy, what's going on? I've just been, I don't know. It's been a long night, I haven't been able to get much sleep.

I'm just thinking about how we're greeting our customers and how responsive they are to it. It just doesn't seem like it feels good. I want to loosen it up, you know? Can we have a team meeting and kick it around? Of course we can. I'm sorry I called you so late. Never feel bad about calling me at 3.30 in the morning to talk over your concerns about

our customer's responsiveness. Thanks Barb, you sure are a great manager. You too. Click. Who is that, honey? I want to know what the fucking dipshit that works for. I hate this job. We decided to lighten up a little, like ad lib a bit, when we were serving people. And it worked. It really did. People's personalities started to show through. I mean, they really started to have fun.

And the customers, they really enjoy being treated like individuals too. You know, that really makes sense. It's like, well, I know that actors sometimes need to ad lib a line or two. It makes their performances more natural. But I just don't want to violate any McDonald's operating procedures. I had this one scene in Stripper Killers Part 4, where the guy just wasn't getting into the love-making scene. So I said, let loose, whack him off for real. And I'll tell you what, it made all the difference in the world. Sold an extra three DVD copies. Well, no, don't worry about that.

Our procedures are mostly in the areas of work routines and methods, and those have been developed throughout the years to make us work more efficiently. But when it comes to how we treat our customers, what we want to impress them with our friendliness, our service, and we can't do that if we come on like robots. Well, sure. Okay, let's try that scene again. our service and we can't do that if we come on like robots. Okay, let's try that scene again. She's talking about the smiles, which I'm always impressed with the people that can do that.

They can just say, Hey, what we really want to do is yeah. Maybe that's how I'll start responding about the commercial break question. I'll just do it with a smile. The commercial break is a great comedy podcast. You're gonna love it. What's it about comedy?

So what do you guys do? Not really sure, actually. We're weighing it. We don't know either. Time everybody loosen up a little bit. Okay, places everyone. Take two. Okay, everybody, the entire scene now.

Dolly? And that- Dolly, take your shirt off! Oh, sorry! I got lots of movies I'm working on. Thank you, come again. Hi, how you doing? May I take your order? Yes.

How about aare of fish? Uh, hmm. French fries and uh, small coke, please. Will that be a large fry, sir? Yes, please. Sorry. Small coke machine is not working. Flare of fish, round of. What can I help you with?

Yeah. For here? Yes, for here. All right. Your total comes to 319. I'll be right back with your order. Thank you. And cut. All right, look good to me. Wow. Wow. That's better. Don't even name it. Don't even. Yeah. You can lay last night, bro. That was awesome.

That was hot, hot, hot. Love it. Love it. Ont it onto the next see what are we doing next? Let's go come on I got all day here kids cook dealers right now side. Let's go Sorry, no, I'd like the opening and then it starts to get a little formal hmm Now maybe could your customer be a little more Normal normal, yeah, maybe a little less be a little more normal? Normal? Yeah, maybe a little less, probably. Yeah, could you like, you know?

What was done, normal, about his order? Could you take out a gun and start shooting people? Or like we see. Could you call 911 because your fries aren't hot? Yeah, it's more normal. You know? Yeah, it's too tick-tock. Yeah, could you tick-tock us?

Oh, okay, okay. Mr. customer,ed off. Yeah. Can't keep you ticked off us. Oh, okay. Okay. Mr. Customer, this time, take three and action. Thank you. Come again. Take 23. It takes 23. This act is breaking down every little thing. I work in McDonald's guys.

I, I, I sign up for 23 takes. Take a long time to get through those. One tiny line. One tiny little thing. I work in McDonald's guys. I sign up for 23 takes. I take a long time to get through this. One tiny lot. One tiny little part. Yeah, but you know, Barb's on it. She's making everybody more loose. Make it a name for herself. For you today, yeah, I want to flay a fish,

french fries, and a small coke, and nothing else, okay? What's that supposed to mean? No. And nothing else. You're hamming, you rat person. Nothing. Not a goddamn thing else. You try and slip me an extra french fry I swear to God.

That's so much. Last time I came here, I asked for a Coke, a small Coke, a small french fry, a cheeseburger, and someone gave me an apple pie. I don't want the apple pie. Is that normal enough for you guys? How did that, how was that take? Love it Gary, could you do me a favor?

Punch him, just him punch him. Well, will that be for here to go? Oh no. Oh my goodness. And then he got it out of two. Well, bye. Well, here to go. Oh, no Oh, he got it too well You're gonna go welcome to McDonald's to 2023 Well, it's time for comes on strong like that

We've really got to handle him with with kid gloves People like that are almost always looking for Like true like they say turn the other cheek now the next time this guy comes in he give me your ass to yeah I'm now on take number 37. Yeah, give me your ass cheeks. I want you to moon him I want you to spit in his coffee and put extra ketchup on his no ketchup burger. You do that That's normal. We got to treat him normal kids That's normal. We got to treat them normal kids Nurse if you treat them right today make sense get that Jim Let's try it again. You got that Jim. No, I'm a fucking dipshit

Come on man. I got one line. You don't think I got it. Let's take number 26 Hi, may I help you? Yeah, I got it Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Line! Hi, may I help you? Hi, I hope you may I? Take number 57. And action! Thank you. Come again. Oh, I will. Hi, what can I do for you today? Yeah, I'd like a filet fish, a small coke, and a fry, and nothing else.

Okay, is that a large fry? I said a small fry. There. This is exactly what I'm talking about. I come in here trying to get a small french fry and you try and sell me a large french fry. I said small! This is insane. We would watch these videos go on for days.

Sorry sir, I didn't hear you. Is that for here? Yeah, for here. Alright, your total comes to 278. I'll be right back if you order. I'm good old 270. I didn't hear you, I don't like you. I wanted to bother you. Yes.

And cut. Great. Well what did you think? That was a lot better. You know sometimes it takes that little bit extra to avoid confrontation. I least a... Oh boy, does it ever, but it's worth it. Okay, let's set up for the next scene. But it's worth it. The last person who got beat up in our store, it was disappointed. Alright, I got more of that. We'll get back to it. Ah, that's funny. We'd watch hours of that. I'd get when you were actually trained.

Oh yeah. Yeah. It was like 70 tapes, you know, they had like a break room. And then the break room, they had one of those small TVs with a VHS on the bottom. And it already integrated into it. And they'd have a big handbook, and you'd have to, the quest, you'd have to answer questions.

Anytime you have a quiz on a training material, it sucks. It does. But you just keep on putting those tapes in. So I think I spent the first five days of my working career at McDonald's just watching those videos over and over again. And I couldn't have been more excited.

I know. Couldn't have been more excited when I got to work the grill. Yeah, I was 18 years old. Grill. The grill. That's where all the cool guys work. Oh yeah, that's where all the cool guys were. Oh yeah, but. That's where all the 30 somethings.

Did you have like a, did you rag on? Of course I did. Actually, back then it wasn't allowed. Yeah, so you wore a hat. You wear a hat. Yeah, you wear a hat. But you'd be constantly sweating inside as somebody else's burger.

Yes, there's no two ways to avoid it. Now they just microwave everything. I actually think they're all machines now. I think literally, the guys just preload the meat and the machine throws it down and it cooks it. Yeah. It's awful. I used to love a good McDonald's hamburger,

cheeseburger every once in a while, just not anymore. And half of it is the food. Most of it is because the food just doesn't taste the same, doesn't taste good. I only got the fries. Most of it's, I mean, I only eat fast food when I go on the road.

That's it. Like a trip. Yeah, a road trip. Or a hospital. Or a ride off a trip. Yeah, no, to the natural places you would eat fast food. Yeah, road trip and a hospital. Thanks, Norse.

I keep that tradition going because, you know, I hope my kids get to go to the same McDonald's. All right, 21 EPM stickers are here. Therefore, you TCBpodcast.com hit the contact us button, send us your mailing address and your name, and we shoot those out about once every week or two. We put a whole number of them together and we throw them in the mail. So you'll see yours in a couple of weeks. If you have any questions, comments, concerns or content ideas you'd like to share with us or you want to ask tcb 855 tcb 8383 1855 tcB 8383 from anywhere in the world toll free and if you'd like to join us here live on the commercial break T-C-B live, 775 T-C-B live, dial

it in. Okay, at the commercial break on Instagram and youtube.com slash the commercial break, episodes the same day that they are now Chrissy. No delay. So, and we'll be on Smart List next week. Yeah. Toon end on the 6th of March. All right, Chrissy, I guess that's all I can do for today.

I think so. Until next time, I love you. I love you. Best to you. I best to you. Until next time. We always say we do say, and we must say, goodbye. Goodbye. We do say and we must say goodbye.I'm a starI'm a starI'm a star

I'm a star I'm a star I'm a star I'm a star you