The Commercial Break - Handy Me Down

Episode Date: January 11, 2024

Questionable hand me downs, phantom sperm pain, and a trip to Tucky has Bryan & Krissy squealing wih laughter this episode. Bryan loves a British comedy But he doesn’t get the jokes The thousand pound sisters Bryan’s household is worse than he thinks He's having a come to jesus Astrid makes homemade pinatas?!?! Incredible The hypocrisy of it all Bryan’s phantom sperm syndrome Recommended EPMs POISON JIZZ Cum courier Bryan bought a pocket pussy And that's on being non returnable The world’s most horrifying hand me down  Mountain Monsters! We’re goin’ to Tucky The closet in the cornfield? Heavy sighs from Huck We gotta roll out, boys LINKS: Send us show ideas, comments, questions or concerns by texting us   626.ASK.TCB3 text or leave us a voicemail Watch TCB on YouTube Creator: Bryan Green Co-Host: Bryan Green Co-Host: Krissy Hoadley Producer: Christina A.  Producer: Gustavo B.  

No more sin! Cause we're at skies! It's inappropriate and violent! On this episode of the commercial break... Okay, this isn't rent the runway. You can't stand back, you're fucking pussy. You can't really hand me down. It does someone get there.

No, it's not like I'm gonna give it to my kid at 13. It'd be like, son, my father and my and my father's father used to fuck this small truck. Now you're gonna fucking two This is a hand me down hand me down you know what I'm saying son The next episode of the commercial break starts now. Yeah, boy! Oh, yeah, guess again. Welcome back to the commercial break. I'm Brian Green.

This is my beautiful co-host, Kristen Joy. Only best to you, Chris. And, does he, Brian? And best you out there in the podcast universe. Okay, we were talking last episode about this poop transplant. Oh, shit. We were talking about it. I know, I'm gonna bring it back up just for a second,

because I just learned that here in our own town, there are companies, facilities that are willing to pay $500 per specimen for research on this fecal matter transplant FMT Okay, so get a pooping Chrissy. I know that's Get a pooping make up up smacks for money. Yeah, that's true. Who needs sponsors when I I got $500 coming out of my butt every morning Save that morning press conference. I'm sorry, sir. There's too much There's too much fentanyl in your poop

I can't thank you Well, of course you hear leans clean life So take her food. I've been juicy you have How's that going good? Good adding it in just put it into the mix I keep the willing to pay $500. Yeah, that's a lie. I bet you have to go through like a laundry of tests. Probably.

You have to be super clean to do that kind of thing. But it might be worth the drama, especially since I poop once a day at least, so if I poop once a day, look, hey, that's $500 a day. Maybe you can just recruit some of the people from your gym and split it with it. Oh yeah, I'm gonna recor-

Fah, fah, fah, fah, fah, fah, fah, fah, fah, fah, fah, fah, he looks like he's clean living. Or maybe my friend is taking all that testosterone. Yeah. Get that shit in your gut. You'll be feeling really good. When that one lady said she had the transplant and then she felt so good afterwards.

Yeah. It's because of all the, that's all the testosterone in her, her food. Oh, I am, I just have to say this. And I know it's gonna make me look like an idiot, but why not? This entire podcast is dedicated to me looking like an idiot. So why not? Let's just keep it going. You know, I love those British comedy shows.

And so I hopped on one that's on the BBC or whatever, the Brit box or whatever. And it's called the trip. And the trip is Alan Partridge, who's like a famous comedic actor, comedian, that's a number of television programs for the BBC. Right, okay. And he and his friend, it's like a mockumentary, right? They go on trips, weekend trips around the country, around UK, to go to different restaurants

and hotels and historic places, and then they have fun, right, the entire time. This is the highest brow of high brow British comedy I have ever watched, and I've watched a lot of British comedy. And when I say high brows, and then certainly the jokes are like huge intellectual, you know, riddles that you have to figure out. It's just that there's so much of it that goes over my head that I'm finding myself watching this show just like I read a book. You've read a book and you're like so tired or kind of uninterested or whatever you read

to page and then you have to go read it again because you're like, what was I just reading about? You're like thinking about a million things. Right. And I find sometimes, especially as I get older, this happens to me a lot where I'm like, I'm reading something and then I'm going, wait, what just happened in the last page? I gotta go back and read it again.

Yeah. Because my poor brain is leaking out with, you know, Disney Jr. song. It's overblown. It's overblown. Yeah, there's too much going on in that head of mine. And I am trying so hard to be an intellectual British man. I feel like I was born in the wrong country. You do love your British. I am trying so hard to be an intellectual British man.

I feel like I was born in the wrong country. You do love your British. I do love my British shows. I feel so comforted by them. I don't know what it is. Is it the politeness? Is it the dry wit? Is it the kind of loony? The accents?

I don't know what it is, but it feels like a warm blanket every time I turn on the British comedy. But this one has me actually thinking. Most of the time, I don't have to think, I get it, right? This one has me thinking, and I feel like such a fucking moron watching this show because they're telling all these jokes and giggling about them. And I'm like, wait, was that a joke?

Was I supposed to get that one? Let me rewind it. Just check and make sure that I didn't miss anything. And it'll be like, you know, it's 17 fold to fold. The Queen's Hunchets on the Ratchet, the Fox on the Hound. And I'm like, you know, in 1744, the Queen's Hunchets and the Ratchet, the Noth, the Fox and the Hone. Woohoo! And I'm like, what? Huh? Queen's Ratchet and the Hatchet and the Fox and the Hound,

the fuck is this guy talking about? What's the stuff that may mean, you know, specific things to people in Britain? I know, but I want to know. I want to look it up. I want to be that guy. I want to be the guy who understands the highbrow British comedy.

There's like six seasons of this. I even even got through episode number two. I've been watching it for four months. I swear to God. I'm like, oh, fuck, why do I do this? And they'll read poetry, like when they're driving down the road, one of the guys likes to read poetry to the other guy, right? And they'll laugh about it.

He's like, you know, and miss crumpet with her noodle in the suikin' and the poodle and then down on the ground when you have to run round. And he was like, I better miss his crotch and run around with the ground on the ground. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. And he was like, I better miss his crotch and run around with the ground and the bound. And I'm like, what? Huh?

Why was that funny? I mean, it's funny, sounding, but I don't know why it was funny. And then they'll do all these voices, like Sean Connery, saying intellectual things, like, you know, so British Russian, personal, personal, personal. And I'm like, what?

What? I want to know. I'm so bad. Oh, you might what? What, I wanna know. I'm so badly. You might just need to stick to TLC. No, I gotta expand my horizons a little bit. I can't be 600 pound life guy forever. I can't be my 1000 pound sisters forever. I can't, I just can't.

My kids are gonna think I'm a total fucking moron. I mean, they already think I'm a total fucking moron, but when they get old enough to realize exactly what my pop culture intake is, they're gonna be like, I have the uncoolest dad in the world. He watches my thousand pound sisters, the seven little Johnston and Britbox. And Britbox.

Britbox. Which by the way, Britbox is a Britbox, because they don't show any shows that are younger than 2008. They're all like old shows. So I'm watching these shows from 2007, 2006, whatever. No, they've got that new carry grant one that I want to watch. Carry grant. Yeah, it's all about carry grant. Well, that seems to be a high brow for me too.

I don't know. I think of carry grant. I think of like a high brow guy. I don't know. So we played a lot of high brow guys. We'll swobb, devonet, devonet air guys. Was he in, uh, was he in that famous scene, Casa Blanca? Was Karen Grant in Casa Blanca? Mm, I don't think so. He is. He is not gonna do you a character. No, that was,

and then he goes, Marlon Brando. No, no, no. Tom, crazy. Al Pacino, Spencer Tracy. Dick Tracy? That was Dick Tracy? No, shit.

Harris, not gonna do a cat. Never got that. Never understood it. Never understood when it was a great seat in the movie, but it cost a bore. Well, it was the times. You know, again, maybe you're watching stuff from old times. Old times. Maybe I'm just watching stuff that's age appropriate for me.

You know what I'm saying? Maybe I should start watching age appropriate stuff. Like, you know, the NRIE channel, or something like that. One Fox News, or what, one America, whatever that shit is. I walk into my mom's place in that retirement home. Yeah. My mom's in the hospital right now.

Everything's okay. She's, I mean, this is okay. It's gonna be when you're in a hospital. But she's not gonna make multiple trips to her house because every time she needs something, I gotta go to her apartment, get it, and then, you know, back. And every time I go in there,

I'm like, I am a good son. Yeah, I'm a good son, because now I realize that if I don't show my kids how to treat their parents, then that's the way I'm gonna get treated. Right. You know what I'm saying? So if I didn't have kids,

I'd probably just ignore her, but since I have kids, I just can't ignore it. Now I'm kidding. She wants to come on the show, and I'm like, mom, I don't want you on the show when you have kids, I just can't ignore it. Now I'm kidding. She wants to come on the show, and I'm like, mom, I don't want you on the show when you have that fight when you're in a fucking hospital, that beeping and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah,

blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah,

blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah There you go. It's Chrissy's therapy. Yeah. So every time I walk into that apartment complex, they got that, whatever the news channel is, we're all, you know, it's a little weird. They have the super conservative news channels, which is fine. People watch, whatever, points of view, I get it. We all have our own shit. But it's just a little, it feels a little off to me. And then they have all the books, that's like the magazines,

and everything is geared toward, I feel like scaring old people into being more scared about the world around them. And I can understand it. Like when you get older and you get frail, the world becomes a little bit of a scary place. Yeah, there's lots changing and going on. You're not like me,

spray and young and ready to take on any hooligans to come your way, you know what I'm saying? That's not my mom. a little bit of a scary place. Yeah, there's lots changing and going on. You're not like me, Spray and Young, and ready to take on any hooligans that come your way. You know what I'm saying? That's not my mom. She's like, you just got to walk her. She walks around like that. So things get scary and then you go to the place that's feeding you that information

and telling you all the things that you can do to, by mainly voting for someone, that you can do to change the world around you. When, you know, you can get just a scared watching CNN. I think you could just get scared watching NBC. Yeah. So, I go into that place. And then, when I go into my mom's apartment,

she's got the fucking TV on, Chrissy. I swear to God, it is so loud. The loud. I can hear it the second I walk into the retirement home and she lives at the very back of the building and you can hear this. Oh, oh mom takes she has it on a hundred. When I go to change the volume like turn it down it was on a hundred and she sometimes she complains I can't hear my TV and I'm like you can't hear anything then mom because you have it on

a hundred who uses a hundred on their volume. I've never made it past 40 I don't think. And then Astrid complains that I'm listening to it too loud. Here just like your mom, no, I'm not. I'm 60 to 60 points away from my mom. I only go to 40, she goes to 100. Give me a break. I'm not that seat out. Am I yet?

I don't know. She's got that thing cranked up so loud, Chrissy. Yeah, mom, all those people do that. Bucking unbelievable. And speaking of television shows that we were watching, we were talking about seven minutes ago, before we started this whole tyrant, tyrate on my mom's volume.

You don't watch this on TLC, but there's this, thousand pound sisters. Have you seen this one? I've seen about it. Tammy and Slammy or whatever their names are. Tammy and I have watched it, but I've seen snippets about it. Yeah, so it's two sisters who, I think the show initially was because they had some popularity

on YouTube doing this YouTube show and combined, they weighed over a thousand pounds. They're big, big, big girls. And the first episode of this show, I shit you not. They're sitting there and they got bottles of diet soda in front, two liter bottles of diet soda in front of them. And they're just guzzling it out of the two liter bottle. And they say that they believe part of their weight problem is because their mom told them that every time you eat a sugary fatty snack, you could reduce your calorie intake. In other words, you could get negative calories

by drinking diet, come by drinking diet. So, I mean, it's just so like, it's wild, right? It's insane. That's sad. It's sad. Bad misinformation. Terrible. Terrible. So the whole show is about their, their journey and their sisterhood and their, you know, they both now have gotten this weight loss surgery from a doctor that's actually here, I think he's here in Atlanta, I found out mistaken. So, there's our season number, whatever, six or seven. This is one of those shows that I don't really pay attention to, but like sometimes I put it on in the background

just to kind of catch up on whatever's going on. It, this show is simply insane. This show is a picture of two girls who live in Kentucky who are, I feel like this show is just a little snapshot of what's going on in many, many, many households across America. Many households across America. And that is terrible diet.

Family that's a little bit off. Misinformation to the Hilt. They barely have command of the English language, you know what I'm saying? And every time I watch it, I think to myself, this is not about the Slate and Sisters, which is their names. This is not about the Slate and Sisters. This is about what's happening in so many homes across America. Yeah, that's tough to think about. I know. And I think to myself, thank God, I live in a normal household where nothing fucked up goes on.

I am so glad that this household will not produce shitty children that drink negative diet coke calories. You know what I'm saying? Yeah. That is also wrong. Because when I look at my children, all they want 24 fucking hours a day is candy and cookies. No matter how hard I try.

Candy. Candy. Candy. Candy. Candy. Candy. No. No. Candy. Get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, get me, relationship to get to the candy. I caught them when I walk into the thing and the one's got a step ladder and the other's one's got a stick

and they're trying to swipe it off there and this shit all over the ground. They're in the pantry, just knocking stuff over left and right. A little bit to the right, a little bit to the left. These kids are incredibly intelligent because they're trying to get to their candy. And I think to myself, the Slate and Sisters are a snapshot of what's going on

and every household in America. I mean, I, you know, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I like to think to myself I'm different than the Slate and Sisters, but I'm not different than the Slate and Sisters. My kids also think that Diet Coke is negative. I've never let my kids drink a soda ever, ever. They've never had any soda whatsoever. Yeah, that's right, good.

No, it's not, but it doesn't matter because in the United States of America, it is so accessible. All this fatty sugary food is so accessible. And so convenient. And so convenient. And I, you know, sometimes I think we watch stuff or we look at stuff like Instagram,

you know, we like hate watch posts and you know, we're following these people because they're ridiculous or fat or ugly or whatever this stuff is. It only takes one second of critical thinking to realize you are no fucking different. You know, the other day I was making fun of this person on Instagram who's the anti-influencer,

who just, you know, I don't show my tits, but my breakfast, and that's all she's doing is showing her tits and showing you her breakfast. And all the breakfast club and how many parties she went to and all this other shit. I think to myself, thank God I'm not that guy.

But then I come on this stupid program and I talk about every fucking thing that I'm doing as if someone's gonna be impressed about it. Like as if someone really gives a shit about what Brian shout out for breakfast this morning. I mean, it just doesn't, I'm no better than any of them. No better than any other human being on this earth. And we are all doing the exact same things,

maybe not to the degree of the Sladen sisters, maybe we're not a thousand pounds, but who's to say we won't get there? If my kids can formulate a plan and write it on a chalkboard and tell you they're drawn up a football plate. Okay, you go to the left, I'm gonna go to the right. You distract that, follow down the stairs and distract that for a few seconds.

Well, I go up with the stick and nothing's all over. That's my nephews are the same way they love the candy. Giddy, giddy. Once you get them a taste, they, that sugar. Oh, Halloween was just that. The worst, the worst. Two things I gotta say about this. Number one, I think to myself, well,

I'm gonna whip these kids into shit. There, they're gonna have candy and fatty foods and all those other stuff. I'm sitting there at the midnight, the other night, eating a bowl of cereal with fucking half and half. Fucking lucky charms with half and half. One of my kids comes in, Danny, I wanna sleep with you.

And I'm like, okay, as soon as I finish my cream and lucky charms, and I'm telling you not to eat candy, so they're fucking hypocrite. That's such a fucking hypocrite. And the second thing I got to say is that, yeah, we got one of the kids birthday's coming up, and Astrid's buying little gifts, you know, she's so good at all this.

I'm buying gifts, setting stuff up, and you know, making sure that everything looks good. If it was left up to me to plan my kids anythings, I would literally go to Kroger the night before and buy some streamers and be like, I'll be Christmas. In a card, you'll get your present when you turn 18. But she does it up right, you know,

cakes and cookies, all this other stuff. She was about to make and homemade pinyadas. She makes home made pinyadas for every birthday. Every birthday she does that, and I just think it's wonderful. And she doesn't like go buy them. No, she makes, she was making it. Yes, she puts this, every little detail on there,

a buy hand by herself. She's really good at it too. Yeah. So she comes in today and she's got all these party favors. She doesn't, listen, instead of the kids getting candy as a little takeaway, we're,, we're gonna give them little toys. That's a good idea. Yeah, and a little art set

where they can pay them some stuff like that. Good job, Astor. Piece of canvas, and all of a sudden I thought, oh, that's such a good idea. Because nothing pisses me off more than going to a birthday party. And then kids,

they play for five seconds. And then the next thing they're eating pizza and then they have potato chips and then they're giving them fucking fruit juice that has no fruit in it. And then the next thing, they're eating pizza. And then they have potato chips. And then they're giving them fucking fruit juice that has no fruit in it. And then they're having cake. And then there's cupcakes. And then they give you candy.

And then they want to give them a bag full of candy, walking away. And Astrid and I always say to each other, and by the way, we talked to other parents about this who have done this. Like, we have. And they say, yes, that's just stupid idea. Then why do we do it?

I don't know, because it's what you do. I guess, I'm not really sure. So, for this kid's birthday, it's, it came to me last night, she goes, listen, tell your family and anyone's coming to the party. Don't get any more fucking toys for the kids. Don't get any more candy for the kids. Tell them to make a donation somewhere, right?

St. Jude's or whatever you gotta do or to the college fund or whatever you wanna do. Do that, because if we have one more fucking thing in here, you can have three million toys in your playroom and the kids want a chew on a broken wire. That's what they want to do. They don't want to play with their toys. They want to stick needles in their eye. That's what they want to do.

They don't care about the toys. They care about anything they can't have. Like the candy that's up on the 15th shelf in my fucking pantry and the kids are, you know, acting like Tom Cruise in Mission Impossible, flying down from the attic. Like, I got it. It's so crazy. It's insane. How are these children so smart? I know they usually just want, they end up going to just a couple of toys and then you lose interest in that. So yeah, I started doing like just small gifts for my nephews and then doing money to savings.

We talked about this. Just so I can give them something. Yeah, you want, like, I get it. Okay, a little gift. All right, a little something that they can open up and make some feel good. Yeah. They feel happy that they got something, you know?

They really like these books that I've been getting. And they're the like about animals that are going extinct. Is this photographer Joel sort sort day? This is name and yeah. And they love looking at other pictures. These will be around when you're older, not to understand what they are. Well, it kind of tells the view about,

teaches them about conserving the earth. Well, it kind of tells them about, do you just them about conserving the earth? Oh, okay. That's got a good message to it. Scaring the kids in. No, I guess. Yeah, like some of my kids like books too, but you know, some of them don't, and then you get this whole thing. It's getting this whole situation. Where, and plus, you can get the kids a million toys also. But what happens is one of the children ends up finding a toy that they have some interesting game with and then all the other kids want to play with that one toy.

I find myself being judged Judy around my house every fucking 15 minutes or so. Right, he's got it. I know, he's got it, she's got, okay, who had it first? I'm just not really sure. Okay, if we don't share them in a take it away is I'm saying all the same things my dad, I'm a god damn dad, I'm a god damn dad.

I'm a god damn dad. Never wanted to be my dad and now I'm my dad. My dad was right about everything. Fucker, fucker. He was, he was right about every fucking thing and I find myself being my dad. That's what I am. And I wish that I wasn't.

You know, my dad did, he never had any candy in the house. That was it, that was the rule. We just didn't have candy in the house. Until we got old enough to buy it for ourselves or you know, get a did, he never had any candy in the house. That was it. That was the rule. We didn't have candy in the house. Yeah. Until we got old enough to buy it for ourselves or get a dollar and go into the quick way. Yeah, we didn't have a lot of candy either. I mean, we weren't not allowed to have it.

I think that's a thing, you know, because if you tell somebody, no, they cannot have it. That's what's happening. You want it more. Yeah. But yeah, we didn't really have candy or a lot around in that.

That's when the kids start devising plans to get up on the 15th shelf You know what I'm saying we definitely didn't have a big bowl of candy You definitely did not know no no bowls of candy. We had a lot of like snack things my mom will buy snacks Yeah, like the hostess stuff and nutter butters and all other crap I don't think they have nutter butters around anymore. I hope they've changed that name. Seems offensive. I don't know. I feel like somebody in 2023 would take offense to the word nutter butter. I don't know if they're still around or not. Not her but her. Do you know that the twinkies are. Oh twinkies are still around. Yeah because you can't throw those things away.

Swiss cake rolls. Oh yeah, this was cake rolls. What about ding-dongs? Ding-dongs. Yeah, they got to be around, right? Ding-dongs, ho-hoes. The Christmas tree cakes, cinnamon. All the classic favorites from the 80s and 90s that were, have you well on your way to being the slate and sister? I know.

Okay, let's take a quick break and that will be a fact with more of this usual. Alright. Are you mindlessly scrolling Instagram right now? How about throwing us a follow at the commercial break and also at TCB Podcast on TikTok? Check out our website, tcbpodcast.com to find absolutely everything you could ever want to know about us, and if you simply can't stay away, call us and leave us a voice now at 626-ask-tcb3, or you can text us at 8x5-tcb-8383. While you're contemplating divulging your life dramas to us, have a listen to our sponsors. You know you love me, exo-exo-gossip

girl. Have a listen to our sponsors. You know you love me. Exo, Exo, Gossip Girl. Hey everybody, I want to let you know that this episode is sponsored in part by Factor. Okay, do you want to know what the single biggest challenge for me as a single person was? Shopping for, prepping, and cooking nutritious meals. Do you want to know what the biggest challenge for me as a human with 25 to 60 family members living in my house, shopping for, prepping, and cooking a nutritious meal. Breakfast, lunch, and dinner, it's a big stress point around here. And since I don't really know how to cook, that stress often falls on other family members. But this holiday season, we're going to try

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We also want to thank factor for being a sponsor of the commercial break. break. Alright, I promise I tell this story. I have a follow up on the story and I'm going to follow it up. This is definitely not safe for work, so if you have your children listening, you're an idiot. But here we go. So I got my vasectomy a couple months ago at this point, a good month ago. And when I got my vasectomy, I had some post vasectomy, pain syndrome is what they call it.

So I don't know what it's called, PVPS, PVPS, or whatever it's called. I got PVPS and I ended up going on the internet to look and see, you know, they conveniently don't tell you this ahead of time, but apparently it happens in like upwards of like 30% of patients. What I was gonna say, I think it's more common

than people realize that going to get these. Yeah, and they don't tell you this stuff at a time. The doctor doesn't give you a dissertation on what you could experience afterwards. And so a couple of weeks into the recovery, I felt like maybe I was one of these guys. Now that I'm in some big Reddit hole about post-visectomy pain syndrome,

which was remarkably mature conversation, by the way, for Reddit, I just have to say that, congratulations post vasectomy pain syndrome, Reddit posts. They were remarkably mature, and a lot of guys were sharing that they experienced this for six, sometimes 12 months, sometimes longer. Wow.

And what it is is basically it's referred, it's invisible pain. It's like the, like someone gets a leg, has to get a leg amputated, and then they feel this, like residual pain. That's what's going on in your testicles. They're feeling their residual spur? You're feeling the, they have nerve endings down there,

and it's like trying to, you know, it's like, dude, dude, you know Dude dude your balls are on fire We disconnected somewhere among them. Yeah, they do try and reconnect Some's going wrong down here Pay attention no no no no don't whack it go to the doctor you dumb dumb Well, I can't go to the doctor because the doctor says it's just part of the recovery process. I don't care what the doctor says. Some loose down here. Shit's going wrong. Can't you see the size of your testicle? It's a softball, bro. I'll put some ice on it. Stop listening to Jeff. He's

no scrumble Sherpa. Get on it. Go to the doctor. I did call the doctor. And the doctor says, hey, listen, part of the deal. It's part of the deal. You'll be fine. Everything's okay, right? Don't worry about it. But as it get deeper into this, there is a certain amount of, let's call it homework that you have to do

after you get done with the specific. You do have homework. The pipes are not cleaned out just because they've been snipped. You have to clean them. And it's more than our other recommended, what do you want. Yes, it's very often. You have to do it very often,

which with 35 people in the house is really hard to try and get your homework done. You got to, you got to like, set an alarm for four in the morning. Yeah, there's a recommended EPM. Yeah, you have to set an alarm, I have to set an alarm for four o'clock in the morning and tiptoe around the house to whack off.

That's like how it. 50 shades of gray. Yeah, it's turned out 50 shades of gray. Get myself, you know, do a little self love. Mine and I go in the mirror and I light some candles. I put on some soft music and then I tickle my nipples with a little horse crop. Horse crop.

I go to my own red room. I'm making up my own red room in front of the mirror. So I'm like, okay, I guess I should do this homework, or there's no point to the vasectomy, but I'll do my homework. I'm just gonna- I gotta get it out. Yeah, I gotta get it out,

because I do not need any more children that I run myself. For God's sake, that's what's been pregnant for like 10 years in a row, and I've been changing diapers for 30, so I gotta be done, I'm done. And she's done. It didn't take us, there was no conversation about this.

It was like, I don't like birth control, and I was like, I'm getting a sect of me. She was like, done. Let's do it. Okay. We said too in our household. Yeah. Although I didn't see a little twinkle of sadness with Astro yesterday. Yeah.

Oh, you did? Yeah. As we said, the, oh, the baby's, you know, she's growing up. Yeah. And she's like, I know. I think it's exciting, but also to have. I just ignore. I just ignore that little sad. I ignore that little sad. It's kind of like when you're, I know, but trust me, you're going to have your hands really full.

Yeah, yeah. Oh, you'll be fine. Don't worry. you'll be playing the occupant. You'll be glad. I feel like it's a little bit of a war going. I'm in war with Astrid, not against her, but with her. Like, you know, she just saw her, it saw her best friend get shot, right? And I'm like, we just got to get the mission done. So ignore your sadness for right now. Yeah, yeah.

You got to get the mission. Mission critical. This is the most important thing going on in my life right now. Not this podcast, not those kids. Most important thing is that I don't have another one coming, right? Right. And then I get all the poison out. That's what I got. Yes. So they actually do call it poison on like your little test box. Yes, it's like poison. Poison. Chef, what's sure it's like, it says it's poison on here. We have a ginger sample in the beach. Well treat it like poison Well, there's two things about that one. It's got all these signs on the box like

Poison jizz It literally says cum dumpster on the box And you got to carry this thing around in office complex for an hour trying to find a doctor. But here's the other thing is not only that, but I have to call the doctor's office in hour before I intend to come to tell him I'm coming. I have to tell him I'm coming before I'm coming so that he can be in the office to take a look at the sperm. Okay. Because you can't I guess count sperm when they're dead. I don't know. I guess that's what's going on. You have to be alive. Because you can't, I guess, count sperm when they're dead. I don't know.

I think that's what's going on. You have to be alive. That's what I've been told, right? I don't know. We didn't do that. Our, our's were mailed off. He mailed it off? Yeah, that's what I say.

There was a little, there was a special box. Did he have like some special like, come career, come? Yeah. Come careers, I don't know. No, you came to the mail man. The come career. Yeah.

Ha, ha, ha. Got sent off. I know you came to the mail man the come courier Got sent off I'm the man mail man. I'll be right here waiting for you to gizmo that cup to Shuttle it off to Colorado for testing So no, I have to do a come courier thing like I actually got to put it into a box and then bring it to the Bring it to the office. Okay, and they tell me I have to call ahead of time to let them know I'm coming within two hours, right? So that you're attending the office. Yes.

That's first of all, the most embarrassing thing in the world is to have to call the doctor's office and tell me you're about to jizz. I got, how quickly or slowly do I have to make that phone call? No, I don't know. I'm assuming that phone call you know i have to be i don't know i'm assuming that i you know and then you make the call and spread

uh... listen uh... i go get close i think that there's a doctor it i'm sorry he's not Doctor it. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, It's insane. So, okay, so you have to do this homework. You gotta shoot off about once a day, really, for like 60 days, something like that, right? To get it all out, because there's still sperm left in the tube. So you have to get that stuff out of the tube,

even though the tube is clipped and colorized, you have to still, you know, do your thing. Clean it out. Clean it out, clean out the poison. So, I, but there is no way that I feel like I can accomplish my homework in the state of pain that I am feeling. Like there is no yanking going to go on. Now I can't even, like my boxers rubbing against it was feeling bad.

So at this moment in time, back then, I was like, okay, well, I don't even know how I'm going to accomplish this. Luckily a Reddit reader, a Reddit writer had a whole post on this and many other men chimed in. And here's what they said about the Post-Poseectomy Pain Center. You can get toys that do the work for you without any yanking, right? Get a robotic or an electronic thing that vibrates and twists around and does all this stuff, a fake vagina, right?

A basically a pocket pussy. And I'm thinking to myself, well, I have come to new lows now. Literally, I have come to new lows. I have got to get a pocket pussy to do my homework. But I also know that- Well, you didn't have a deer homework right away. No, not right away, but I'm getting to the point that they say 10 days, right?

Yeah, 10 days and then you got to start doing your homework. So, 70's and days. I'm getting nervous, because I'm on to the point that they say 10 days, right? 10 days and then you got to start doing your homework. So, seven to 10 days. I'm getting nervous, because I'm on like day number nine, and I'm still not, I'm getting nervous, and I'm not gonna be able to jizz all over the place, appropriately enough. So I'm like, okay, all right.

So I told, I told Tina this, sorry, the listeners probably have heard or maybe they tuned out the second they heard. That I go, I go onto the very famous sex toy shop that everyone knows about. And I look at the ratings basically. I'm looking for electronic vagina with high ratings, right? That's what I'm looking for. Yeah, you want to go high quality. I want to go high quality. I want to know that

lots of other guys have had experience with this. You don't wanna get a one star rated pocket vagina. You know what I'm saying? You wanna get the highest one. You wanna know that all the other perverts out there feel great about it. And people write these long fucking reviews. That's like Jesus. It's felt just like coming into a fucking hot chitchat.

And you're like, okay. So I stopped reading the reviews, I just look for the star rating, right? Let's think I like 5,000 star ratings. So I'm like, okay, so I stopped reading the reviews. I just look for the star rating, right? Let's think of like 5,000 star ratings. So I'm like, oh, okay. I didn't pay much attention to the actual machinery. I just said, okay, this one, right? I'll order this one.

So I order it. You didn't like look at what it does in the description and then that. It said vibrating electronic vagina. I thought that's good. I'll see that one, sure. I don't know. I've never bought a pocket pussy before,

so I don't know. So I order it, and then of course all the Christmas packages are coming, fast and furious. And now I'm running around the house, like whispering to Astrid. The pocket pussy is coming. The pocket pussy is coming. Hi ho, hi ho, the pocket pussy I know.

He's coming to a date and the kids will go away. Oh ho, hi ho, the pocket pussy I know. He's coming to a date and the kids will go away ho ho, hi ho, hi ho, hi ho. I'm checking, I'm monitoring the front door. Don't wrap that, President. I know as soon as the Amazon comes, the guy comes, I open the door and I'm like, is it a pocket pussy? So, I don't know if I'm from Amazon.

But anyway, so finally the thing comes and then I'm like, okay, now I gotta come. Like, okay, now we gotta get to like okay now we get to get to work right Chrissy I swear to God This thing the box is so big and it is so heavy But I'm like what did I get myself into before I even open the the cardboard box that it came in right Non-descript to Brian Green from pervert services, right? that it came in, right, non-descript, two Brian Green from Pervert Services, right?

Right, right. I'm sure my name is on a mailing list somewhere. Now I'm gonna start getting to, you know, Pocket Pussy discount, mailers. Yes, I'm shit. It's for sure, eh? So it comes, I open up this box, Chrissy. What showed up was not a Pocket Pussy.

It was a small Volkswagen with vagina lips on it. It was a machine. It was a car that I had to now fuck its tailpipe. It was the biggest thing I've ever seen in my entire life. It's like this big. It's like this big, it weighs like five, four, five pounds. I don't know, it's so heavy.

I don't know what to do with it. What happened to it like parts of it like clang into the floor? It's got like a tripod. It's got a tripod and then you got a measuring tool and a compass on top. Balance. Yeah, you got a run at it and attack it like, yeah! I'm in! I'm in!

Press the button quick. It's got a remote control. like, I'm in, I'm in, press the button quick. It's got a remote control. It's got this thing, this supposed to tickle your balls. I don't know, it's a whole thing. So I'm like, oh my god, this is so embarrassing. I don't wanna fuck this thing. I don't wanna fuck anything except my wife.

I really don't. Like, I don't wanna have sex with this thing. I just don't. I've never used one, and now, I mean don't. Like, I don't want to have sex with this thing. I just don't. Right. I've never used one, and now I mean, listen, I talk like a, like a prudish fuck on the show, but I am definitely not. Like, I am all about it, whatever it's about, but I've never owned one of these things,

so I have no idea. Oh my God. So now I've got this contraption that I've hold with two hands. Right? And so I was telling Tina, I'm like, there's no way I'm gonna have sex with this Volkswagen. Like, I just can't do it. So after we open it, I'm showing you to acid.

I'm in the shower and then acid is like on the way out the door and I'm like, there's no way I'm fucking this. I'm sending it back. This is crazy. It's ridiculous. I don't need this thing. And she's like, listen, you don't have to be embarrassed. Go ahead and do your thing.

Yeah, yeah, do it. And I was like, it's not embarrassed, man.'t need this thing. And she's like, listen, you don't have to be embarrassed. Go ahead and do your thing. Yeah, yeah, do your thing. And I was like, it's not embarrassed, man. Or maybe it is, but I just don't wanna have sex with this car-shaped vagina. Well, I just don't. And she's like, okay, okay, good night, right? So. Well, if you're in the shower,

then I know you've got your phone. Oh, definitely. Yeah, the shower is the place where we got everyone. I'm sorry, that's where you think. where you look at other material. I couldn't think about the I could. I got out my sears robot catalog. My JC Fenni. 90 Victorist. Yes. I don't even like to go that graphic. I'm talking like JC penny bra catalog from 1984.

That's what I'm into. That's where my four minute of years were. Right. I steal the JC Penny catalog from my mom. And I'd be whack it off underneath the bin. So I'm like, okay, all right. So a couple days go by. I find myself like each night like taking it out, looking at it, putting it back in the box,

throwing it away, like putting it in a secret place. So the kids don't find it. I can't masturbate in the shower Yeah, because I have 30 children and it doesn't matter what time of day or night it is They just pop in whenever they you know I can't control when they sleep or don't sleep and the last thing I want to do is ruin my children By them walking in a log on the door right? I do but if I lock it then they're gonna wake up their mom because the And daddy's the deaddies the shower Well let me in you know and then now with the whole household is up my mother-in-law's in there my But I in blues barking at me everybody walks in and I've got a small car in the shower that I'm fucking

Hey Oh Man Gustavo's like brother You balls are black and blue bro And my kids are like Why is daddy's penis stuck in that car? More importantly my sense penis look like two soft falls. I can't everybody settle down. I'll just try to do my homework. So I found myself like taking it out,

like I press the button is like vibrating, but it's not vibrating a little bit. It's like, do do do, I couldn't use this thing because the whole house would wake up. Everyone would know. It's like, you can hear this. Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! So, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, it's vibe, you know, try to figure out what it likes. It's got this weird vagina face on it.

It's like, oh, that doesn't really look like a vagina. So, finally, I'm like, okay, Brian, stop being a fucking pussy, and fuck the pussy. Can I just stop doing this? Stop being an idiot, just go for it. You gotta do it. Chrissy, I swear to God, I promise you, this is the truth. I am not in any way well endowed.

I am an Irish boy from Chicago. I'm the shortest of all my brothers. I've never been particularly big in any department. And but I could not for the life of me have sex with this thing. I couldn't get in it. And I, but part of me was like really not happy about having to do it in the first place. And then the other part of me was like,

I was kind of like giving it like the half try, right? I was like, okay, but I could not for the life of me. No. No. I know, we're like, it's like I'm in a weird relationship with this thing. I'm like, okay, just the tip I'll just put the tip in let me see what happens. No, it's not adjustable. It's like a sleeve that goes down I can explain it right but it's but there's no adjustment

It's it's a tube that goes into a larger piece of machinery that causes the vibration and the sucking, I guess. And then it comes with cleaning juice. And I'm like, I'm like, this is fucking gross. I just don't wanna do this. There's just nothing about me that wants to do this. So, but I'm trying, but I'm giving it the old try, but I cannot get in it.

Like it won't go in. It's like I've never experienced this before. No vagina in my life has been too small for me. And this is the one that I get the extra small version. What is the extra large version look like? It was three minutes of comedic embarrassment is what it was. I was like, this is God just sending me a sign that I shouldn't be doing sex toys.

Because even I bought the most expensive convoluted contraption, most highly rated thing in the world, where 5,974 guys had no problems with it, and they sent me a malfunctioning one, not vagina that doesn't open. Where are you using the microphone? I feel like there's got a piece of mistake. There probably is. I've probably actually had to have a boner to get it in there. I don't know. Because I wasn't excited about it.

It didn't excite me. I wasn't like, you know. Tell you're saying this is not going in your red room. This is not going in the red room. And luckily, a couple of... Serpese. Yes. You walk in.

Woooow! Woooow! Luckily, a couple of... Serpies. Yes. You walk in. Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Welcome to my bedroom. That's my Volkswagen pussy. I just gave up at some point I just gave up. I said, okay, not for me. All right, whatever. Luckily, I was able to do my homework a couple of days later with minimal pain.

Like it hurt, but I figured it out. We got there. And just the way I always have since I was 11 years old. I figured it out. Me and my 10 friends figured it out all by ourselves. You can't send it back. No, you can't. As soon as you're open it, you can't send it back.

And that's probably a pretty good policy. I'm on board with that one. I agree. Yeah, this isn't rent the runway. You can't spend back your pocket pussy. You can't really hand me down it to someone either. No, it's not like I'm gonna give it to my kid at 13 and be like son. My father and my father's father. You're still fuck this small truck. Now you're gonna fuck it too. That's it, it's out from generation. This is a hand me down.

Hand me down. You know what I'm saying, son? I don't want you to grow up like I did. I want you to experience new things. Here's some cleaning juice. You might want to take a stab at that. And I don't mean that literally Oh my god

Oh my kids are gonna hate me when they get a hold of this podcast All right, we've got to take a break this way too long But that's the update. There's the update. I tried, it didn't necessarily work for me, but. You tried. Listen, I know a lot of people use them and God bless you. Maybe I just, somebody you sent me as an advice or something, I don't know if I ever wanted. Maybe you need to get back on that thread.

Yeah, let them know. Yeah, I'm gonna go leave a comment. Yeah. How do you get into this thing? Yeah. How does this work? Question mark. I'm going to contact support.

Do they have support for some? I bet they do. You know it. Let's think of breaking. We'll come back with Mountain Monster, some of your favorite. We'll be back. Oh, finally. I feel like I was waiting forever for my turn to talk.

Now that I have you, go to tcbpodcast.com to find all of our audio and video content, and follow us on Instagram at the commercial break and on TikTok at tcbpodcast. Wanted to be your turn to talk? Call us and spill the tea at 626-ask-tcb3, and you may hear your voice on the show. You can also text us your tea at 855-TCB-8383 and boy do we love to hear it. Anyway, take a listen to our sponsors and let's get back to the show.

Okay, let's get into it quickly. We got a little bit of time left. I wanted to start the season off right. We've already done a Frankie B. We're gonna cover a couple of our old favorite topics and then we'll get into new material. I love we would have the poop thing too. It was a great way to kick off the new year.

Trim Brian's pocket pussy and poop shake. I think we've all told a rousing start. Yep. Our new network's gonna be jazzed with us or jazzed with us. That's one of the two. All right, uh, mountain monsters. I had to take a look at this mountain monster because the title of the video is

we caught a creature on camera. Oh, and that is something they have never done. Yeah, I got it. I finally got it. I finally got it. It at first it looked like bigfoot, but it turns out. It was just brine pocket pussy and left in the woods. It was vibrating, running scamper it across the woods. It was running from Brian. You know what I mean? Alright, okay, one second. Alright, I was throwing on the internet.

As I do like to do, here you go. Here's your mountain monsters, kick off season number five. Alright then, I actually probably have to press play, huh? I guess. I lost it on this bucket. I must have done this bugger here, take a shit. Called a Kentucky crapper. Fit it away for a sample. That's right. It's the turkey crapper.

The turkey. I'm just not calling Kentucky, turkey. Oh, yeah, maybe he's doing the FMT,T. Yeah, he might. He might need it. It's going to dump this out. I bet you are going to dump that out. Something out now. Get the bell out. Right. Oh, there it is. Nails and a bell. This is the bell. That boy was forced to come out here. That's a bicycle bell. What? You guys have gone to New Lowers. You put out a bicycle bell for monsters. What the good fuck is going on here what bet what monster Response to a bicycle bell

You'll find my bell The folklore is come out in this cornfield with no lights you ring the bell and something's supposed to happen Something's supposed to happen. Something's supposed to happen. Sounds like a great plan, Hawk. Let's go out in the scary woods, with no backup, and make sure we ring the bell. Turn off all the lights. Yeah, turn off all the lights. Ring the bell.

Sounds great. I'm in. I can't. It's kind of like the my experience with the, with the vibrator. Yeah. Something's supposed to happen. It had to be tough as males. At being said, I'm not trying to lie out. Here we go.

When I have one of the cameras in infrared light that cannot be seen by humans, that cannot be seen by animals. Part of me hopes nothing happens. Well this sounds like a well thought out strategy here. Let's turn off all the lights, ring the bell, and have the death bell monster come and eat you up. And the camera, so I think he just might have set that up. The camera, you can't, animals can't see. And humans can't see the infrared.

But it doesn't really look like infrared to me it looks like he's got a light on because he had a headlamp on that he turned off it made no difference in the amount of light that was shown none there's only one way to find out listen to that music. Rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr Let your death cat come over! Run, Rover! Run, Rover! Let your blood thirsty monster is fan-eating human creature come over! Put this belt on.

And now I guess I just wait and see if everything happens. What the fuck is going on here? Guess so. Jeff has entered the upstairs closet. He wants to experience the folklore himself. I didn't notice a closet in the woods. I don't know which cornfield has a closet. That's cool. A closet's in cornfield.

So it's just Jeff, one of the members of the cast who's sitting in a, I don't know, building somewhere with his head in his hand. He wants to experience the folklore himself. Can you just read a book about it? Isn't there a plaque like they have on the side of the road? How is it experience they didn't do with his head in his hands? They didn't let it get so walled. Yeah, he's been over dramatic.

That's what they get paid to do. Chef. Oh, I'm so sick of laugh. Is that Jeff or Huck? I think that sick of laughs. Is that Jeff or Huck? That was Huck. Huckleberry. Is that an Huckleberry?

I thought it was Huckleberry. It's Huckleberry number four. Because the old Huckleberry wasn't fat. Now he's fat. What happened? They are switching Huckleberry's on. I'm sure of it. And the tattoos, I think that's new. I think that's new. I think that's new. I think that's new. I think that's new.

I think that's new. I think that's new. I think that's new. I think that's new. I think that's new. I think that's new. I think that's new. I think that's new.

I think that's new. I think that's new. I think that's new. I think that's new. I think that's new. I think that's new. I think that's new. I think that's new.

I think that's new. I think that's new. I think that's new. I think that's new. I think that's new. I think that's new. I think that's up. It's an average shadow. Like a camera man. Oh, shadow, another sub-micro-fudge shadow. You mean when you stand in front of the ladder cause of those shadows? I got it all wrong guys, I'm so sorry. Can we start from scratch?

No, Jeff's in a psychodic coma. Okay, I leave him be. I shouldn't have given him that crystal meth. I'm sorry guys, I really ain't. BEEP Oh, there was a voice that said run. Did you hear that? I know I'm scared. Now they come running out of a closet. I don't pick. No idea. I got him. I got him. 15 seasons of this and I found the Got him. Oh, no, it's just the paper tomorrow night's roast. I'm sorry, guys.

I was the one we were watching. We're the chicken. The chicken. That chicken got to find a car. They were driving a four wheeler around a farm at night. And a rooster just came running out in front of him and he hit the rooster. They didn't mention it. Not one major. The guy's the ghost of that rooster. Yeah, that's right. Go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go,

go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go You know, listen, we got a baby to your Chrissy. You gotta show it off. That's all I got to say Me and brother will he's working in this course or something we hear streamer come my bitch That's the guy that's the yell every time he speaks every time We need to get over and see what the hell's going on. Wow, Tommy's a lamb!

No, bro! Come on, Bill. She came at me. I'm telling you, she came right there at me. My wife. She's trying to have sex after 36 years. I didn't know what to do. I don't know what to do with that money.

She came right there at me. I don't know what to do with that money. VW pocket pussy. You know what I'm saying? Hmm. They're mother. She had blood all over her mouth. It was the most great test thing I've ever seen.

It's just- It's just mother. Well. What did I know? I know Huckleberry's like, well, I've seen this a lot in my creature hunting experience. When your mother's got blood on her mouth, it means she's been eating some bad chicken wings from that chicken wing place in the gas station.

You know what I'm talking about. Anytime you get chicken wings from a gas station, things are bound to end up bad. That's not blood. That's wing sauce. From the wing factory inside of the shipron. Like a huge flash of light when she entered the room. Mark comforting words from Huckleberry. He just saw his dead mother with blood on her mouth. Huckleberry has to say it. Well, the LSD is really kicking in now. We get trails, I'm getting trails. It's starting to feel it me too. Oh

It's my favorite episode this season I know what that closet is but when you go in there you can't unsee it. What's going on? Can't unsee it. Why this is you can't unsee the hangers? Jeff Bro, hey! Yeah, we're all right, guys. Top! Just tangtied for a minute. We just got over to house and looked up.

We could tell they're all shook. Trapper Builder. I can't say name. Whatever his name is, but I'll have some official title. It is his Trapper Builder. Trapper Builder. Trapper Builder. Cool down our Jeff Broke. We need to get them down here.

One more to the bottom. And figure out what the hell happened. Why aren't they always telling us what they have to do? Like, we got to move them three feet to the right. So we can get to the bottom of them. We got to run through that cornfield naked. Make sure we understand what's going on. We gotta put that ladder up there so we can get up.

We gotta put gasoline in the car so it can drive. We gotta cook that chicken before we eat it. What the hell was all that? We need to get the hell out of this building. You're just gonna have to take our word on it. All right. All right. So, it's got Jeff and Hunchuk.

Move out. Roll out. Like the fucking seals. Roll out. I mean, Huck literally rolls out. He's like, dude, dude, dude. He's like one of those. What was her name? For Rooka Salt. I think I just rolled across that walk of factory. As a blueberry. Yes Go Jepro I've never seen them boys in this kind of shape Willie won't you and Bill go get side-by-side back pick us up. We'll be back in two skips right now

We need to go find that side beside we need to go get five They've seen something and we need to get the hell out of here But we are gonna tell you why Because that's information the privilege Yep, I'm high as fuck I'm tripping balls now boys Hey, can you put on that scarlet bagonius into the fire on the mountain back into scarlet bagonius from the 77 Wilkerson Amphitheater? I didn't appreciate it. It makes me feel better. I found something in that closet. What'd you find it was an old smash mouth record

And he's dead I don't want to show you or tell you right now. Let's wait 12 buckets together. Yeah You don't hold around the camera boy. He and he see agrees to it It's like I just saw the most scary thing in my life. It's sure to kill us all I know the dates of our exactness But let's wait If you don't mind. Yeah, yeah, that makes sense. We got to wait on that one I understand we got to think that one through I get it. I like to know what the hell J.I.T. I'm hooked singing that house. That's good Dan, we gotta think that one through, I get it. I like to know what the hell, J.F.A.H.C.A.

I'm hooked singing that house, man. That's good. Don't play any of your followers, let's get the hell out of here. You know, the folklore was that he came out here. No lights, you ring a bell. You know, maybe it was just kids talking. I Know it doesn't matter or anything happens. So what happened was they went back to original Yeah, the original spot where it was so okay listen reading of the bell happened. Yeah, I know all right

So listen, we're like way over time right now. Sorry, okay, we'll get back to this. I promise, very next episode. Very interesting. This is very interesting. I do want to see if they actually catch something on camera, which of course they don't, but. But yeah, thank you. It's fun to think about.

That's right. I'm gonna catch Brian in the shower. But there's both of my good fog of those. That's a very scary. Ah! Ah! Ah! Soul Cove Doaster!

Alright kids, don't go whack it off without reading the comments first. That's all I got to say. You never know. I'll probably read some more of those comments. They'll probably share though. It's not for well endowed men, which I'm not. So I'll probably share that it's not for well-indoubt men, which I'm not. So I don't know who it's for. This makes me feel better. In some weird way, it makes me feel better. Maybe I'm just a little bit above average. Or maybe I'm using it wrong.

Maybe you're supposed to loosen it up, take it to dinner or something. I don't table for two. Maybe and a Volkswagen over here. table for two, me and a Volkswagen over here. Could you imagine I'm having dinner with that thing on the table, trying to spoon feed the vagina. You want some dessert, honey? Go slow, go slow, go slow, I don't want you to choke. Jeez, waiter. Can we have some more lube over here? Thank you. She gets a little parched. Oh, that's sucky.

All right, TCB. Most ridiculous episode of the commercial right yet. And that's saying something, tcmpodcast.com. That's where you go for more information about the show. You can watch all the videos, listen to all the audio right there from tcmpodcast.com. That's where you go for more information about the show. You can watch all the videos Listen to all the audio right there from tcmpodcast.com and you can get your free piggy-fronting sticker It's free to you. It costs me money. So go ahead Twist in the knife

By going to the website hit the contact us button drop down menu says I want my free sticker and there you go Give us your address and we'll send it off to you. At the commercial break on Instagram, tcbpodcast.com TikTok and youtube.com slash the commercial break. I would also like to let you know that you can leave us a message or text us at 626stcb the number 3 that's 1 626stcb the number 3 questions, comments, concerns, content ideas, we take them all. We'd love to hear from you.

Okay Chrissy, a great day in the books my friend. That's right. I love you. Best to you. Best to you. Best to you out there in the podcast. Pocket pussy universe. Until next time Chrissy and I always say we do say and we must say.

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