The Commercial Break - Hotel! Motel! Harry Denton's!
Episode Date: August 23, 2024Episode #588: The Looooooove Connection is back, and they brought yogurt? Bennifer is no more Green Day Wedge salads Matthew Perry Love Connection! A little misogyny to start the day Get him gi...rl Harry Denton's A little ask TCB action Who is eating yogurt on a date No lunch date kisses Skydiving on the first date Pre skydiving drinks Come To Our Shows: Dania Beach Improv (Tuesday, Sept. 24th) The Funny Bone Orlando (Wednesday, Sept. 25th) Text us or leave us a voicemail: +1 (212) 433-3TCB FOLLOW US: INSTAGRAM:  https://www.instagram.com/thecommercialbreak/ https://www.instagram.com/bryanwgreen/ https://www.instagram.com/tcbkrissy/ YOUTUBE: https://www.youtube.com/thecommercialbreak TIKTOK https://www.tiktok.com/@tcbpodcast Visit our website: https://tcbpodcast.com/ CREDITS: Executive Producer: Bryan Green Hosts: Bryan Green & Krissy Hoadley Producer: Astrid B. Green Producer & Audio Editor: Christina Archer Christina’s Podcast: Apple Podcasts & Spotify To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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This is where the aliens is at. They think the aliens is up, them motherf**kers is down.
The aliens are in the sea.
Look at a crab in the face the next time you eating it
on this episode of the commercial break we're gonna come on down to harry dinsons the classiest
there will be no dropping of the beat young. Here we play smooth jazz and smooth jazz only.
Got cocaine?
Use our cocaine room.
Glass straws available, spritzed and desanitized for your liking.
The next episode of the Commercial break starts now. Oh yeah, cats and kittens, welcome back to the commercial break. I'm Brian Green. This
is a dear friend of mine and the co-host of this silly show, Kristin Joy Hoadley. Best
to you, Kristin.
Best to you, Brian.
Best to you out there in the podcast universe. How are you? Thanks for joining us.
Breaking news, not at all breaking. Ben Affleck and Benifer, Benifer is no longer Chrissy.
And I know you're very sad about this.
I know this is, this rips the life from your cold dead heart.
I would normally not even mention Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez.
But I read a very interesting
article where people said, people, they, they said, the people that, uh, they, the people,
the people around them said that Jen and Ben almost immediately started having problems.
Like as soon as they got married, they all started falling apart and they stopped talking
to each other and stopped hanging around and all this other stuff because Ben was surprised at
all of the paparazzi attention that they were getting and he was looking to live
more of a quiet life. Why did you marry Jennifer fucking Lopez? She's never not
gonna be famous till the day that she dies she will have paparazzi following
her around and probably you too Ben it's just the way that it is. And I like Ben.
I think he's a very nice guy.
At least he seems like it.
Actually, he doesn't seem like a nice guy.
He seems like a guy, like just a normal dude, right?
Trying to make his way through life, you know,
getting sober, dealing with his demons, like all of us.
And I like, Jen seems perfectly pleasant.
I don't think she's Jenny from the block,
don't think she has been for a while,
but I do believe that it's kind of foolish to think that you're not going
to have paparazzi all around.
Yeah, I can't believe that would have been a major point that he was thinking was going
to happen. No, no.
So silliness, silliness abound. Jen and Ben, what will we do?
Chrissy, what will we do?
I don't know.
I really am, I've been, you know,
I've been crying in my pillow.
I know you have.
Chrissy called me last night.
She said, Benifer, I can't take it.
Benifer's no longer.
And I said, it's okay, Chrissy.
We still have the Green Day concert to look forward to.
And then I perked right up. And then Chrissy was like, thank God we have Green Day to look forward to. And then I perked right up. And then Kristi was like,
thank God we have green day to look forward to. Love green day. Think they're great. I really do.
I think a lot of their songs have just been transformative and great and that kind of like
post-Grunn. I mean, they were really came along along with grunge, but they were like, you know,
punk rockers when punk rock wasn't all that popular at that moment.
But I noticed that they're having some trouble selling concert tickets.
Oh, they are? I think so. Because, you know, you get those ticket master things on your
Instagram and your TikToks and all that, you know, buy tickets now, buy tickets
now, buy tickets now. And I always go to check and see how many tickets are
actually being sold. I do. I'm so fascinated by it. Yeah. Yeah.
Mainly because I'm afraid of how few
tickets we're going to sell on our own show. So I'm like, is the live event, you know, industry
doing well or not doing well? Because there's mixed conversations going on right now. Some people
saying that it's just a matter of how expensive everything is because everybody's out there trying
to do live events post pandemic. And then there's a lot of people who are saying, no, the industry is seeing
a slump because things are so expensive and because everyone has shaken out all
that need to go see concerts and spend money on this type of stuff.
So they're being very particular about who they go see.
And I just don't imagine that the commercial break is going to be
at the top of anybody's list.
I hope so.
But hopefully we're in that price point where it's not to do cost prohibitive. imagine that the commercial break is going to be at the top of anybody's list. I hope so.
But hopefully we're in that price point where it's not too cost prohibitive.
Yeah, there are some Frappuccinos at Starbucks that cost more money than it's going to cost
to see us live. That's no joke.
Yeah, unless you get the dinner and the tickets package.
Yeah, the dinner and the tickets.
And that is they're offering that.
Well, then it's two Frappuccinos. There you go.
But it's like endless fish sticks or something.
I don't know what it is.
It's something, you'll enjoy it.
It was a half a wedge.
Yeah, it'll be good.
And a handheld something.
A handheld drink, like a free Styrofoam cup.
I don't know.
I was asking Jeff, I'm like,
what does the handheld mean?
He's like, yeah, you know,
I think it's things you can pick up easily.
Oh, like a little handheld appetizer? Yeah, yeah, you know, I think it's things you can pick up easily. Wings. Like a little handheld appetizer?
Yeah. Wings.
Ah, okay.
Mozz-realistics, I don't know.
Chicken tenders.
Yeah, chicken tenders.
Chicky tenders, as I call it for the kids.
You want some Chicky tenders?
I like the fact that you get a half a wedge.
At first I thought, well, half.
Why half?
But then I thought to myself,
Chrissy, have you ever eaten a whole wedge?
No. And no, I have not.
I would like a half.
There is no human that's actually taken down a whole wedge salad. A half sounds good. Well, if you give me enough bacon
and dressing to get through the entire wedge, but it never works that way. There's enough to get
through the very top leaf and then you're done. And it's like, well, I don't want to eat just
set lettuce. That's kind of boring. It's so true. It is true. I'm waiting for the chef that says, just gobb it on there. Like 17, you know,
strips of bacon, lots of blue cheese dressing, lots of rope for crumbles, and then we'll give
them enough to get through the whole salad.
I'm going to test this out. I think I'm going to start asking for half a wedge extra dressing.
Yes, that's a good idea. There's a restaurant that I love here in town.
I love a Good Wedge.
I do too. I just love a Good Wedge salad. But even at the restaurants where I worked,
where we served wedge salads, I always, there was no one ever finished them.
No.
Because that last quarter of a half a head of lettuce, the core is there's no more dressing left.
What are you going to do? There's nothing to do. So, if a chef was smart, actually, if a chef was smart,
you just chop up the lettuce,
make it like a regular salad,
and then throw enough dressing in there
to spread the whole thing.
Well, I think that is a thing,
but there's something satisfying
about cutting through the wedge.
Yeah.
And you know it's all juicy and watery?
It's just basically water.
That's all it is.
Exciting about it.
Yeah, I'm gonna have a glass of water with some blue cheese and bacon. It's basically water. That's all it is. I'm gonna have a glass of water
with some blue cheese and bacon. It's basically how I feel about it. But it is crisp and refreshing.
And you go, wow. You know, nothing like a summer afternoon when you're all schvitzing out there
with your sweaty, nasty self and you walk into a restaurant, nice air conditioning, and they have a
wedge salad and you go, oh, that sounds refreshing. That's fatty bacon with a creamy blue cheese dressing on it.
Nothing says, nothing says.
Summer like a-
And a glass of Chianti Classico.
That's a perfect lunch.
Yes, or the buttery taste of a Chardonnay,
if you will, a Chardonnay.
Oh.
Was that, there's a Chardonnay out there
with the name butter in it.
Yeah, there is.
And I can't remember the name of it.
I think it's just butter.
It's just butter, butter Chardonnay?
Okay, all right.
I think it might be just butter.
It's something butter Chardonnay.
And I'll tell you what,
when I worked at that steak restaurant,
we sold so many bottles of that,
especially during the summer.
Oh yeah.
Because I think there's something about the word butter in a Chardonnay that makes it sound like...
And again, this is counterintuitive.
You don't think of butter and summer, like light and refreshing goes together.
Just like wedge with creamy blue cheese, extra Roquefort and bacon doesn doesn't sound refreshing, but it is for some reason.
It really is.
And so there's a lot of butter,
not Chardonnay being sold, butter, but,
butter, but Chardonnay.
Ah yes, straight from the assholes
of the grapes in California.
So anyway, I was looking and I, I, I,
it looks like there are a lot of tickets available to our
show for the Green Day tickets.
And I would have thought Atlanta would have been a stronghold for Green Day, but none.
But then again, every third day, there is some kind of 90s revival band tour going on.
The Smashing Pumpkins, Alive.
I mean-
They're all banding together and doing their circuit.
Yeah, they're doing their circuit.
Yeah, they're doing their circuit.
And I think there's only so much that someone can regale us
with the early 90s music that we're,
I mean, I don't have tens of thousands of dollars
to spend on these.
And there's some of those bands
that I just don't care if they got back together.
You know what I'm saying?
Yeah.
Like Live, great album throwing copper.
For you young people, check it out. It's a band back from the, live. Great album throwing copper. For you young people,
check it out. It's a band back from the 90s. Great album throwing copper. But I don't remember a
single song that came after that. And I don't want to sit through all their new stuff to
occasionally get a song from throwing copper. I just don't want to pay $100 to go do that.
And then I forget who's touring with them. But then you got Blink 182 and then, you know, the people who were growing up in the eighties, you got Motley
Crew, you got Guns N' Roses, you got Poison, you got Rat. I mean, Rat. Who was asking for
the Rat reunion? Honestly, it just goes on and on and on. It's deep and deep and deep.
There's so many fucking concerts. And especially when you live in a town like Atlanta, every
day there's another big name, you know, either Revival
Act or Current Act, and it's too much. I remember-
There's a lot to choose from.
Yeah, like when I was growing up, when I was a teenager, it was like, there would be months
with no big concerts. That way, when you had the big concert, you had to go to it. You knew who it
was, you were waiting for it, you were anticipating it.
Yeah, it was a whole other game back then anyways.
There wasn't music on demand.
Yeah, that's true.
There wasn't all of that.
Yeah, I'm waiting for that chapelle Rhone to come in town
and then I'm going to go, yeah, I'll get crazy.
I'll go get front seats, front row tickets,
and the meet and greet.
I'm going to get the extra Rhone package.
I'm going to get the Rhone Dome package.
I love her.
She's really good actually.
She is.
Finding myself liking her shit.
Yeah, me too.
I really am.
You know what one of my kids is getting into?
Michael Jackson.
Oh, okay.
And so this is a real dilemma for me
because Michael does have some really good music.
I mean, the guy was a very talented musician.
No matter what you think of his personal life,
take him just as a musician, as a creative force. He was a very talented musician. No matter what you think of his personal life, take him just as
a musician, as a creative force, he was a creative force.
Separating the art from the person.
Separating the art from the person.
Which is hard to do.
Yeah, sometimes you get, it gets, the things that people say about them as a person gets
so intense that it's hard to separate the music from the person, the creation from the person.
And in this case, it is hard for me to do that. So my kids, for some reason, it was on some cartoon,
there's some movie out there with a Michael Jackson song, and now my kids, one of them in
particular, but a couple of them, they're really into Michael Jackson. And they're asking a lot
of questions about Michael, mainly, is it a boy or a girl? And I'm like, I don't, you know, it's kind of, I don't know. Who's to say? I think it's a boy, right? And that's
the question they keep asking repeatedly, is it a boy or a girl? Because the album covers,
I don't think they know. But they're so young that, you know, there's just like, they just
have these stereotypes in their mind about what someone looks like. But you know, what
do I say, Chrissy? What do I say? Chrissy Larkin About is he a boy or a girl?
Chris Snell No, I mean about him as a, you know.
Chrissy Larkin Oh, him as a person. I don't think you have
to go too deep into it. But they're, I mean, if they're not asking the question, did he molest
children, then you don't have to go there. Chris Snell
Yeah. Yeah. Or I could say he's a fiddle diddler and,
never proven in court.
Never proven in court.
But-
I can see your dilemma.
My dilemma is, you know, I don't know.
I just feel-
Well, they're just too young to like delve into everything.
As they get older, they can find out more about him and make their own.
Well, shame on this movie.
Yeah.
Shame on this movie for putting you in the hot seat.
Yeah, for putting me in the hot seat and having to make a determination
about whether I want my children
listening to Michael Jackson or not.
I'm like, how about some Huey Lewis in the news?
I think it's kind of right.
The thing is with Michael Jackson songs,
I mean, they're so ingrained.
Oh yeah.
So ingrained in the fabric of everybody.
And listen, when you hear a song from Michael Jackson,
if you're at a party or
a wedding or something like that, it's not like I stop and like protest the song, you
know what I'm saying?
I'm like, oh, that's a good one.
You know, if Billie Jean comes on, I don't go, well, he was tickling that kid's anus
one night while they were in pajamajams up in his room.
I don't do that.
But at the same time, I don't know, it just feels, there's a little
weirdness that goes on with there. You know what else is weird? Speaking of famous people who kind
of had their personal life, may have sometimes overshadowed their creativity, was that Matthew
Perry? Have you been reading about this? That is-
Danielle Pletka I mean, I've read up so far as to the Ketamine
Queen being caught and all of that. Yeah.
Jared Svelter That's fucking insane. That is fucking insane. Danielle Pletka It's really crazy. I've read up so far as to the ketamine queen being caught and all of that.
That's fucking insane.
That is fucking insane.
It's really crazy.
It is really insane.
And now they're saying he was on quite the bender.
Like he, this assistant has now,
I guess some of this stuff is coming out
of the police interview.
This assistant is saying that he was on quite the bender.
This has been going on.
The bender of ketamine?
The bender of ketamine and potentially other stuff.
There were- I guess I didn bender of ketamine? The bender of ketamine and potentially other stuff, there were…
I guess I didn't realize that ketamine was addictive.
I think when you're an addict, anything that makes you feel different, anything that
gets you out of your current anxiety or headspace can be addictive.
And if it feels physically good, anything can be addictive, right?
I mean, it feels good to eat and a lot of people are addicted to eat, and it gives you endorphins or whatever.
But Matthew Perry was in a really bad way,
and it makes me very sad to think
that even the people who were around them
were just like this kind of scuzzy shitheads.
Yeah, I saw that one was like just like a drug dealer
from the streets or something.
It's a drug dealer from the streets,
there's like a paramedic who was like,
they were charging him $2,000 a vial.
The E, the, um, what are the places that you go to when you're sick and you're like-
Urgent care.
Urgent care.
It was an urgent care doctor.
Oh, he's fucked.
He's going to jail for a long time.
You can't be doing that, like selling shit out the back.
And then he called another one of his doctor friends because he realized he was prescribing
way too much ketamine.
People were going to catch on.
So he called another doctor and started
You know having him write prescriptions and then fill in the vials and all this other. It's just like you know I
Don't know. I'm not saying that drug dealing is the worst thing in the world people have to make a living
There's lots of people that we know
Famous and otherwise that have at some point in their life been a trafficker of something that is legal illegal Right, right? Like you're a weed dealer. I don't think you should go to, you're not going to go to
hell. But when you're selling ketamine to someone who's not a trained medical professional, and you
understand that there could be very dangerous consequences to that, do you stop for one fucking
second and think this guy just bought a hundred vials of ketamine from me last week.
Do I need to give him another hundred vials?
Well, I think if you're already selling on the black market, you're not thinking that.
As a doctor?
I think as you cross, I mean, if you first cross the threshold of going into something
that's technically illegal, then yeah, you're probably just in it for the money, right?
No, I'm asking a question as like, as a human being.
So if you are a dog-
Oh, you mean just-
Like just a human being, not like-
It's doing something wrong.
It's doing something wrong.
Like, do you have no scruples?
Do you have no morals?
Do you question nothing at all?
You just say, oh yeah, no problem,
I'll give you another 100 vials.
Knowing that you just went through 100 vials in a week? In a week? Dude, slow down. You're going to kill yourself.
Like, I don't know. I understand what you're saying.
Didn't Dee just keep delivering to you?
Dee delivered to me all the time, but I never asked him for 10 pounds of cocaine and then asked
him for another 10 pounds of cocaine. Do you know what I'm saying? Well, maybe I did a couple of times, but listen.
Very few people die of cocaine.
Right.
I don't know, I just think to myself for a second,
he's a doctor, he took a-
Yeah, the doctor part of it makes it worse.
That's crazy.
It really is just to me, insane.
You know who you're selling to because you've met him in person, you know you're selling to, you know he's in a bad way.
Three weeks before his death, the assistant had seen him go into some kind of like convulsions
or something and just froze up.
He was like, yeah, like a seizure that was really scary. And the doctor saw him, like had to see him
or whatever. And the doctor was like, you have to slow down, but here's another 10 vials
of ketamine. Like, it's just insane to me. Don't, don't fuck up while you're fucking
up. Okay. Matthew wants to buy some ketamine. Okay. Have him come into the office, check
him out, take his blood pressure or something like that. You know what I'm saying? Do something. It's just crazy. And
it's not that I have some super affinity to Matthew Perry. I don't. I saw Friends Like
Everybody Else. Congratulations. Great show. But when you know someone is in a terrible,
terrible way, like is the 2000 extra dollars really going to change your life? You're already
an urgent care doctor. You probably make a pretty good living for yourself. Just- Yeah. I don't think so. I mean-
Oh man, Chrissy. It really drives me crazy.
Somebody who would just know conscience.
No, none whatsoever. Well, we know that because he texted the whoever, he texted the ketamine
queen or whatever. How much will this moron pay? How much will this moron pay? I hope that doctor
goes to jail for a long time. I really do.
I do too.
Because usually I'm not like, I'm not one for the war on drugs. I think it's just a silly, dumb,
stupid thing. But this is a clear cut case of no conscience and just willing to do anything for
the next buck despite how anybody, how anybody may be affected. And that part to me, I guess,
is the part that feels sad. And I just, I don't know, I wish that some, I wish he had just
thought about it for a second, because then maybe, maybe Matthew would have been sad.
The problem, the, the, even the sad, the other sad part of that is that if he didn't do it,
somebody else probably would have. Yeah, that's true.
He would have found somebody else. Yeah, that's true. Yeah, I mean, I do know that too,
but what am I talking about? Who fucking cares? At the end of the day. I mean, I like Matthew
Perry, but I guess you're right. He was going to kill himself regardless. You know what I'm saying?
You can't stop somebody from themselves at the end of the day. Speaking of love and joy and happiness,
it's Friday and it's been a while since we have done a Love Connection video.
Oh, I'm so excited. I really am. I love Love Connections.
I love the Love Connection too. And, you know, I just, we shook it out for a while.
We had like, you know, five, six episodes on Love Connection in season number three, I think it was,
a couple in season number four.
What season are we in now?
I think we're in 20? Season 32? I don't know. I don't know. Matthew Perry's doctor keeps
on giving me ketamine. I'm not really sure. He says, no problem. We're on season five.
That's what I thought.
So we're on season number five. We're in year number five of this shit. No, year number
four of this shit.
Year number four.
We're in year number four of this. Season number, year number four of this shit. We're in year number four of this, season number five.
And so we kind of overdid it in season three,
even though I thought it was very funny
every time we did it.
Season four, I sprinkled them in.
And then we had, I don't think we've done one
in season number five.
Could be wrong, but I don't believe we've done
one of these in a long time.
It's been a while.
Love Connection, the old dating show
from the 80s and 90s.
Chuck Wollery, what the fuck, Chuck.
We've met so many great personalities on the love, watching these old Love Connection videos.
Like so many people that look way older than they actually are.
Oh yeah. That's where we, Chrissy and I determined that people aged really quickly back then,
or we're aging really slowly. One of the two. We met Brad Grundle Skundle. Remember?
We did. really slowly. One of the two. We met Brad Grundel skundel. Remember Brad Gunderson?
That fucking douchebag. So I felt like it came up on my algorithm the other day and I said,
we got to do at least one. We got to do at least one in season five.
Yeah, we got to throw one in there.
Yeah. So let's do this. Let's take a break and when we come back, we'll review a couple. I got
two of them for you. A couple of-
Two and two.
Two and two. We're going to do two and two today.
Let's review a couple of Love Connection videos.
We'll be back.
Okay, you guys, I have an idea.
Why don't we take a break?
Gotcha.
This is the break.
And you already know when you hear my sexy voice, it's time to whip your phone out and
follow us on Instagram or skip the ads at the commercial break
and on TikTok at TCB Podcast.
And of course, you know, if you want to get involved,
you can always give us a call or text us at 212-433-3TCB.
That is 212-433-3822.
And guess what?
I finally have information on TCB Live. So the links are in the show notes, but let me tell you right now.
You can come see us at Daniel Beach Improv on Tuesday, September 24th or at the Funny Bone Orlando on Wednesday, September 25th.
It's gonna be fab. So go buy your tickets and we'll see you in Florida.
tickets and we'll see you in Florida! on the regular studio, exclusively on FanDuel Casino, where winning is undefeated. 19 plus and physically located in Ontario.
Gambling problem?
Call 1-866-531-2600, or visit connectsontario.ca.
Please play responsibly.
Hey, I'm Rhett.
And I'm Link.
Maybe you know us from our daily YouTube show,
Good Mythical Morning.
But this is a little trailer for our podcast Ear Biscuits,
where two lifelong friends talk about life for a long time.
And nothing is off limits.
We talk about our sex lives, our mental health journeys,
but we try to never take ourselves too seriously.
So we invite you to not do the same, or to do the same.
We invite you to listen.
Follow and listen to Ear Biscuits.
Now for free on the Odyssey app
and everywhere you get your podcasts.
All right, you know it, you love it, the love connection, and there may be some people listening to this show,
I imagine a chunk of the audience listening to the show who has no idea what the love connection is.
Back before uh, Flinder and Tinder and lonely fans and all this other shit that you're probably having a hard time finding love on.
There were actual games on TV, like dating games on TV, where people would get connected.
Now, here's the most amazing thing about this. We've said this a lot, so I'll be short about this.
This love connection, Chuck Woolery, who's the host, would bring a man or a woman out on stage.
Then they would have three choices to pick from.
They'd have a little couple of videos that they would watch and they'd choose who they
wanted to go on a blind date with.
Then they would give them their physical address and they would go pick them up from that physical
address.
Can you imagine doing this in 2024?
It would be liability central.
So I'm just letting you know that this is so dated.
I mean, it's so dated.
And so is a lot of the language they use and all this other stuff, but we find it
so funny.
What the fuck, Chuck, was the very first video, still have connection video that
we did and we're super excited now to bring you more love connection here on the
commercial break.
Let's start with, I don't know.
We should start with your Chrissy.
I got two of them.
Oh, let's start with this guy.
Yeah.
Let's start with this guy and there may like, I also want to let you know, there are often times in the Love Connection, which are 30 minute episodes, they would do
one full dating cycle. Like a guy, a girl would come out, they would choose, then they would
bring them on stage, they would talk about the date that they went through, and then they would
decide whether or not they wanted to go on a second date. And then they would bring them on stage, they would talk about the date that they went through, and then they would decide whether or not they wanted to go on a second date. And then they would
introduce you to the next person, but you'd have to wait until the following episode to hear about
the date. So sometimes you kind of, it's like a little, you'll see the person and then they come
back the next episode. This is, I think, is one of those. Oh, I should actually turn the volume on
so we can hear it.
Why not?
Started out by me giving her a phone call and I guess I realized pretty quickly we weren't
going to have anything in common.
Oh.
Well, I mean, I like women who are deep and she just didn't seem like a deep kind of person.
She seemed more like the kind of, you know, woman who probably knows all the colors of
lipstick but couldn't tell you who the vice president of the United States was. Whoa!
Oh, damn.
Okay, we're getting right into it here.
I think it's the next video. He's coming out strong.
He is coming out strong.
So what we're seeing is a guy who is wearing a brown blazer
with a Hawaiian shirt on under it.
He's wearing what I'm sure is lipstick.
And he's- I think you've got makeup on.
He's got makeup on.
And his hair starts halfway back on his head and it's curly.
Well, what's your side of this phone conversation, Robin?
Well, I thought he had a monotone voice.
Yeah, I mean, what is she supposed to say? Like, I mean, she's not going to be like, but
I loved him.
Yeah, he was so cute. I just thought he was the sweetest thing from the moment.
Here she comes, guns blazing.
By the way, Chuck asked him, what's your first impression of her?
And he says, well, I like women that are deep. Is that your first impression?
Did you have to wait a couple of dates to get that? I mean, honestly.
Yeah.
It sounded very boring and that's how he turned out to be.
Get him, girl. Okay. She's kind of half living in San Francisco, half living in San
Diego right now and I'm in San Diego so you'll have to ask her about that but she suggested
I come up to San Francisco for the weekend. San Francisco for the weekend, you know, at least San Francisco for the weekend. Chrissy, can you imagine?
You want to come up here for the weekend?
Yeah. Hey, I don't know.
Stay at my place.
I don't like you.
You're not very interesting. I find you boring.
Would you like to come up for the weekend?
Stay at my house.
The triple B.
So you arrive at the airport and she's there to meet you?
She's there to pick me up.
What was your first impression of her?
I can't imagine.
I cannot imagine.
I cannot imagine. Picking up somebody from the airport I just spoke with on the phone.
Imagine meeting someone on Bumble and then saying, come on down for the weekend.
Stay the weekend.
Of course I have done this, but I can't imagine.
Little disappointed.
In her video, she looked cute, but she looked a little bit older in person than her real
age. She did have a good body though. I will give her credit for that. Oh do give her credit for the good body
What a chauvinistic pig she looked a little older you all look a little bit older
I just gotta let you know what are you 22 you look like you're 47 though
I really do have to say you know it's a shame
She doesn't work out a little less on her body and a little more on her mind
What a dick yeah I have to say, it's a shame she doesn't work out a little less in her body and a little more in her mind. Oh!
What a dick. Yeah.
You don't deserve to know my mind.
You, uh, uh, I just.
Oh!
You're stuck now for a grand weekend.
Yeah, I love the women in.
In San Francisco.
I love the women in the audience, they're going crazy.
Ah, get off girl! Well, Robin. I love the women in the audience. They're going crazy. WAAA! GENNIF GAL!
Well Robin, what did you think?
When I saw him? Oh, I thought he was so fine and he was just gorgeous, the man of my dreams. Not!
Oh, snap. That was a bad burn back in early 1990. Yeah, that biting sarcasm.
She said that video was ugly!
Yeah!
So here you are in the airport and you're deciding to do what?
Well, she had already kind of planned out the whole date.
She has.
Oh, that was nice of her.
And step number one was-
So were you appreciative of that or were you still kind of thinking, oh I wish I was out with this?
Tell him who paid for your hotel, too.
What did you say?
I said tell him who paid for your hotel.
Robin paid for the hotel. I will give her credit for that.
What do you mean?
Well, you're giving her credit for her body and for her credit card.
And for her, yeah, for paying.
What in the fuck, dude? If you're gonna come up there, you gotta pay for your own hotel.
Can you imagine?
I don't understand.
At least there was a hotel involved, though.
I have to say, I'm bad.
You're right about that, yeah.
By the hour.
She paid for your hotel?
Yeah.
Excuse me just a minute, why?
Oh, I just thought, I wanted him to stay next to,
we went to a nightclub called Harry Denton's,
which is one of the classiest nightcl in San Francisco and there's a hook-
Oh, good old Harry Denton's.
We're gonna come on down to Harry Denton's, the classiest night club in all of San Francisco.
There will be no dropping of the beat, young lady.
Here we play smooth jazz and smooth jazz only got
cocaine. Use our cocaine room glass straws available spritz and desanitized for your
liking.
Tell attached to it.
Wait, Harry Denton's has a hotel attached to it. I wanna go to Harry Denton's. Why don't we have Harry Denton's here?
Is this kind of like in Panama City
where Club La Vela was connected to the Holiday Inn?
Yeah.
To it, I thought it would be a really nice experience.
And so.
I can't believe that you weren't more than
just giving her credit,
that you weren't really impressed and appreciative of that.
No, I was appreciative, and I thought that was very nice.
You never said thank you.
Oooh!
Where are the manners?
Is everybody else out there who has kids teaching their children manners?
I just want to know this, because I beat it into my kids' heads.
Please and thank you, please and thank you. Open the door, hold the door, do the things, you know, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, Add some champagne and a Latin gay lover. I also billed that to your credit card.
In the room, I did not ask to bill it to the credit card.
From the room?
Yeah, your calling card.
Don't you have one?
You told me to call you from the room the next morning.
Did I say to bill it to me?
Okay, now I think we're splitting heads a little bit. You put the credit card down for the hotel
room. It's going to get billed to the credit
card.
Yeah.
Can you imagine going down?
Calling card.
Yes, the calling card.
Calling card.
You've got a calling card, don't you?
What am I, selling marijuana on my pager?
The calling card.
I just used the phone that was in the room.
I'd be glad to pay you back for the phone call.
We're getting hostile now. But what do glad to pay you back for the phone call
But what do you expect when you come out with
Guns blazing. Yeah, you come out and you call someone not deep I mean, you know the way they could work on their mind and they're not their body
And I mean when you do that you're setting yourself up for confrontation
I mean
I also understand this a television show and the reason probably why it was so popular is because people got to see the train wreck, like all the drama and all that stuff.
But let's assume for a second that Chuck Wollary is gone,
that what the fuck Chuck is somewhere else.
And if this is like real life,
and you're having this conversation with a friend of yours,
you're trying to be somewhat considerate.
Yeah, she's not my style, she's not my type.
She's very nice, she paid for the hotel room.
We had an okay time.
Probably not a second date.
Just be a little bit congenial.
I know.
You left and went straight to the hotel
and then to the club?
No, we actually went out to dinner
and she had picked the restaurant.
She seems fascinated by the fact that this restaurant
had light fixtures that looked like breasts.
That was why you wanted to go there.
No, no, no. You suggested the rest.
No, no, no, no. You suggested, girlie. You suggested.
Don't you try to get this on me. You suggested the tits in the lamps.
I wanted to see phallus, big penises. That's what I was interested in.
I told you from the beginning, I wear lipstick. Give good blowjob.
You told me it had light fixtures that looked like breasts. I can't believe you. Soldier from the beginning, I wear lipstick, give good blowjob.
The bottom line was the French onion soup was delicious. Sorry, what happened after the restaurant very good food? Did you enjoy the food in the restaurant? Oh the food was good
You know conversation went nowhere. We had nothing in common, but the food was good. I don't have anything in common with you
People are going to church
Because she's standing up for herself and you got to remember this is like 1988 or 1999 and attitudes were completely different back then. I love it. I love this.
So what happened after dinner? For some reason she decided to take me to a wedding reception.
I don't know. Maybe she felt like you asked me't going to go. You asked me if I wanted to go and I was trying to be polite by saying yes.
If you wanted to see Treasure Island, we could stop by.
There's nothing on Treasure Island to see.
It's a military base.
Why are you going to a wedding on a military base?
Do you know the people?
Yeah.
And by the way, Brad Grundenberg also took his date to a wedding too.
That's right.
Yeah.
You asked me to go to the wedding reception and I tried to be polite by agreeing, but
then you showed me off like an animal in a zoo, introducing me at each table as, hi,
this is Kurt, my love connection date.
Hi, this is Kurt, my love connection date.
What did you want her to say?
What were you expecting?
Hi, this is Kurt, my long lost cousin.
Hi, this is Kurt. We met on the, I don't know,
on a chat line, 1-800-CHAT? I don't know. It's true. Part of it's true. I was not showing him
off. I was making sure everyone knew that I didn't choose this guy.
I want audience shots. I know.
Sometimes they do show their audience.
Sometimes they do.
I gotta tell you something, Kurt.
As unsophisticated or unintelligent as you think this woman is, she seems to have a razor edge to her mind to be.
How does date end?
She chose not to use it on the date.
Well, we went to a bar.
Something must have been going right though,
at the same time for them to go to the club,
or to the dinner, then the club, then the reception?
I mean, here's the question.
I mean, if I'm her, I'm like, I'm not feeling well.
Yeah.
Well, it's 2024 when it's perfectly
acceptable to ghost people.
But here's the question.
If you go out on a date, we actually
had someone wrote in with this question.
What's it do on Ask TCB Soon?
Someone actually wrote in with this question.
If you go out on a date, like you're talking on the phone
and you're connecting via DMs or IMs or whatever,
I don't even know what they call it anymore, messaging, whatever it is. And you connect a
little bit, you've had a couple of interactions and you feel like it's now it's time to meet
somebody in person and you make a plan. Like, let's go to, I don't know, Six Flags and then
we're going to go out to dinner and then we're going to go to this bar that my friend owns.
Six Flags. Well, yeah, I'm pretending like we're 18. Okay. So you just, and then you pick somebody up
and right off the get, it's not, you're not connecting like you were offline in real life.
What do you do?
That's where I was trying to say. I'm not, I wasn't saying ghost them. I would say I'm not feeling well.
Yeah. Well, that's ghosting them.
You're just making an excuse for,
oh, it's not totally ghosting them,
it's not like going to the bathroom
and not showing back up and leaving Marlin with the bill.
Yeah, exactly.
Yeah, but that's a really tough position to be in.
I'm not feeling well, I'm so sorry,
like, you know, it's just the way it is.
Yeah, I say my vasectomy's acting up
and I've gotta go, that's what I say. I tell that to Astrid all the time say my vasectomy is acting up and I've got to go. That's what I say.
I tell that to Astrid all the time. My vasectomy is acting up. I'll see you at home. A very low cut dress. She did ask me if she should wear a sexy dress and I said yes,
but this was really low cut. I would say inappropriately so. All the other people
in the bar were very classily dressed. As she says, it was a classy bar. And so all the male eyes I noticed were on one place and it wasn't on, you know, her
face.
It was a very...
Well, what are you complaining about, dude?
She's wearing a low cut.
You asked her to wear a sexy dress and then she wears a sexy dress and then you're worried
about other people looking at her.
That is the highest compliment anyone can pay to your date.
That's right.
If they're looking them up or down, male or female, which I get a lot,
and Astrid gets irritated because I walk into a room,
I float on my silver-starred penis into a room.
Heads turn.
Heads do turn, Chrissy, for all the right reasons.
Let me tell you, is that that asshole
that does the commercial break?
I can't believe he's at another PTA meeting.
Ha ha ha!
He shouldn't show his face in public
very classy dress
it was not low-cut it was just... there was a lot hanging out there Robin
how does this date end?
uh... well you know it was going nowhere so uh...
you know the hotel was just... no kidding
the hotel was right next to the bar, so I went up,
went to bed, and she came and picked me up
and took me to the airport the next day,
and that's really all there was.
Well, it also sounds like you're Mr. Fantastically Exciting.
You're not excited about anything that's going on.
She takes you to the restaurant with tits,
you're not exciting.
She meets you at, you're talking to her on the phone,
she's not the deepest person in the world.
Arranges a hotel,icks up from the airport.
You use her credit card to call somebody.
There are some people on this earth, I think, that are not pleased with anything, no matter
what it is.
There's not one good thing that he said about her in this entire thing, except for, I will
give her credit, she paid for my hotel room.
That's not like an attribution of a human being.
That's someone just being kind and saying, let me pay for it. I'll get it. And by the way,
in 1988, that's particularly forward. I think this woman sounds perfectly lovely.
She does.
I would find, at least for me, and I think you're this way too, I find something interesting about
almost everything that I do, right? And mainly for entertainment on the show.
But I do.
It's just the way my mind works.
Everything's funny or there's something interesting or someone has something interesting about
them.
This guy sounds like a miserable prick who needs to find someone that lives up to his
terribly high standards.
Well, there was a little bit more. What's that, Robin?
Well, if I have to describe Kurt, the one word I could not use would be gentleman.
He was a thwob. He threw away a yogurt container in my car. He stuffed it in between the door and the seat and it got yogurt all over my car.
How did a yogurt container get mixed into this whole thing?
And why are you choosing to eat yogurt in someone's car on a date?
What are you doing?
Astor does this all the time, but we've been married for a decade.
What's going on here?
Plus you're like on the go with 30 children.
Yeah, that's true.
Of course.
I mean, this is how, I have no idea how, hopefully Chuck asks.
Does he ask?
Where did the yogurt come from? Where did the yogurt come from?
Where did the yogurt come from?
Because you don't just keep yogurt in your car.
No, you don't.
So it had to have been purchased.
Yeah, that's something you get at the Holiday Inn Express.
It's one of those go-gurts or something.
I got a go-gurt, mind if I eat it?
Well Robin, I spent more than $200 on that trip.
That's a lot more than you spent.
So I wouldn't complain about BBT.
I had to get myself down there too.
I gotta get out of this.
Yeah, get out.
Pull the ripcord.
Chuck always pulls the ripcord.
That's why we said, what the fuck, Chuck.
You don't ask any follow-up questions.
You're the worst, Chuck.
I mean, you're the best, but you're the worst.
And you were the best and now you're the worst.
I mean, there's a whole thing going on with you.
I don't understand
got you let's see the audience pick this was a disaster
oh pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pekka pe from San Francisco and spent more money. I certainly appreciate you coming on the show. You seem like a nice person to me. Thank you, I had a great time, I loved it.
Sorry we didn't make a love connection for you.
That's okay.
Sure like to see you under different circumstances.
Thanks, I'd like to be back.
Yeah, get Robin another date.
For God's sakes, Chuck, let's do something for Robin.
She had to deal with Mr. Stodgy ass over here.
All right, let's take a break
and then we'll do more Love Connection when we come back.
Hello, my fans. I mean, Brian and Chrissy's fans. Boy, have I got news for you.
We are officially coming to Florida for TCB Live. That's right, you can come see Brian's bald head shining under the stage lights at Danube Gym Prove, Tuesday, September 24th, and at the Funny Bone in Orlando on Wednesday, September 25th.
If you can't make it to see us in person, text us or call us at 212-433-3TCB and leave
us a little love note instead.
As always, please, please, please follow us on Instagram at the commercial break and on
TikTok at TCB podcast.
Our content is shockingly good, so get after it.
And you already know I put every single one of those links in the show notes.
You're welcome.
All right.
And we're back.
We're having fun with Chuck Woolery here on the love connection.
I've got another video for you.
Let's check it out.
And I'm going to skip through the video calibration here.
Oh, this guy's a total asshole.
Well you know it's like women drivers, now I don't think all women are bad drivers but
some are.
You'll be on the road and you'll look over and you'll look at a girl and her head's bopping
up and down like, you know, with the blinders on.
For no reason at all.
They're just enjoying themselves in the car.
Just having some fun.
You'd be riding down the road, you know what I'm saying, Chuck, and then someone will be
smiling, you know?
And you just want to grab them by the neck, smash their heads onto the steering wheel,
chop them up, put them in a freezer, and bury them in your backyard.
You know what I'm saying, Chuck?
Their car will be sticking out in the road.
Some guy will come on, hit the car.
I see this all the time.
I see this every day.
Some bimbo's got a back end of a car sticking out.
Some other dude hits it.
She's smiling.
He's bobbing.
The girl will walk away Scott clean, but if she had wasn't bobbing up and down.
And she'll walk away Scott clean.
Obviously this has happened.
When have you ever seen this?
Yeah, exactly.
Under what circumstances are you, what roads are you traveling?
That's what I want to know.
He just stopped and watched the whole thing happen.
Oh my god, this guy's a douche.
But in all fairness, don't you think some men are like that as well?
Absolutely.
Oh, okay.
They're usually gay, Chuck, gay!
Completely biased. I'm not completely biased. Well, absolutely. Oh, okay. So this is your not- They're usually gay, Chuck, gay!
Completely biased.
I'm not completely biased, but-
I'm mostly biased.
I'm about 99%, Chuck.
20.
Now you say a lot of women find you arrogant.
What exactly do you mean by that?
Well, I have a lot of-
I don't see why.
Yeah, I can't imagine.
Confidence in myself and my abilities,
and it's, you know, take it or leave it.
You are what you are. If they like it, then that's fine. If they walk away, then no, I you know take it take take it or leave it if they like it
then that's fine if they walk away then no I don't take it personally
well anyway he seems like he's gonna make some girl a happy woman
I want to see how many divorces he's had since 1990 forget you're gonna pick the
woman that you think's best for him here we go first Sue Ann she never kisses on
a first date she will kiss on a second date unless it's a lunch date now she does what that's a
very specific rule I'll kiss on the second date but not a lunch date it's
too early in the daytime. Find the pain when she goes out and she thinks that
some men talk too much here's an example of that I guess. They have to fill it up
with with unnecessary conversation.
Like, there can't be silence.
They're not comfortable with just not saying anything.
Okay, we're having a good time.
Sounds like an episode of the commercial break.
You can just be quiet for a few minutes.
And next, Tina.
Her favorite opening line is, hi, I'm Tina, how do you like me so far?
She says that she...
That's actually a good one.
I like that.
I'm going to use that.
The next time you're out.
At the next parent-teacher conference.
...meets a lot of men at the gym, and unlike Sue Ann, Tina refuses to ever pay for a date, and here's why.
Booo!
You monder!
Who is it?
Booo!
I monder!
I think it's important that a date pays for me. I mean, I could not imagine paying for a date simply because I think it's important that a date pays for me. I mean I could not imagine paying for a date
Simply because I think that shows that whether or not they're capable of providing for you ten years down the line when you have three kids
Okay, just goes to show you not all it's not all men that have backwards thinking
Okay, just goes to show you, it's not all men that have backwards thinking. Finally, Olinda.
Olinda moved here a month ago from Seattle.
She claims that she won't date a man with a mustache or bad teeth.
Now she recently spotted a great looking man at a club and here's how she got his attention.
As he was making his way through this narrow...
How old did it say she was?
27. Geez. Wow. As he was making his way through this narrow How old did it say she was? 27?
27?
Geez!
Wow!
She looks like Chelsea Handler!
How is this Chelsea Handler in her 50s?
I think she is 50.
Chelsea looks great.
She looks amazing.
He was making his way through this narrow aisle way that I was sitting on.
I just stuck my foot out and tripped him and he didn't fall the way down but he stood
up and or he straightened himself out and we all started talking and we decided that
was a really good way to meet guys so I've tried a few times.
And now that's led me to be on this dating show.
It worked out so well.
And now I cause every third guy I meet to go to the emergency room with a broken skull.
All the way down but he has a big knot on his shin.
Okay, those are the three women Bob had to choose from.
Time for you to vote.
Make your choice now.
By the way, have you ever seen the movie The Incredibles, the Pixar movie, The Incredibles?
Yes.
Yes.
Okay, this guy looks like the father from that.
He does.
He's got this huge chin.
It's sticking way out.
Who would you say?
Three!
Three!
I know what's best for everybody!
Here's where it shows the audience, and they're choosing, like, their pick. Who would you say? Three! Three! I know what's best for everybody!
Here's where it shows the audience and they're choosing, like they're picking the...
Yeah, the old pick-a-meter that they have in front of them.
We're going to take a break. When we come back, we'll meet the woman that Bob selected.
Hear everything that happened on their date. Two and two. Be right back.
Oh, two and two.
That's simply the best thing ever.
It really is. There's simply the best thing ever.
It really is.
Yeah, there's commercials in here, so I'm just going to speed forward.
Oh, a commercial for a Ouija board.
A Ouija board, because, you know, I guess, and then a turkey cake.
Oh, and then, have you been hurt?
Lawyers, medical arts training center, oh, Presto.
What's Presto?
Oh, I think this is just a commercial. Oh, Kmart. And then
you can go to Walmart, Kids R Us. There's so many good commercials in the 80s.
There are.
All right, we're back. Bob's going to tell us who he picked.
Well, I chose Olinda.
Haven't seen each other since her date. We always hear both sides say hello to Olinda
Brown. Oh, they had a good date. hello to Olinda Brown. Hi, Olinda.
Ooh, they had a good date.
He winkled at her.
Yeah, he did.
He tingled on her.
He gave the finger tingle.
He gave the twinkly fingers.
Who does that?
The twinkly fingers.
I do that to my children.
Hi, Chet.
Bob says hi.
Make yourself at home back there and Bob will start us off.
Well, I called Olinda up, spoke to her sister.
Her sister was a little short with me, but uh...
A little short, was she rude?
She was a little rude, but...
A little rude, but I punched her in the face when I got to the house,
so I felt much better about everything.
I didn't even leave a message. I called back and actually I left a message saying,
hey, this is our love connection.
I didn't even leave a message, but I called back and left a message.
Did your sister form an impression about Bob?
I mean, she'd tell you, I to this guy, and boy, was he.
Yes, she formed an impression.
She called me up at work and said,
Olinda, you have been chosen by the biggest jerk in history.
I feel so sorry for you.
Oh, nothing.
She felt really sorry for me, Chuck.
Oh, did you agree with that?
Well, the first time I spoke to him, I already had this in my mind and he got on the phone and he said,
Hey, hope you don't have any hang-ups, you know, get my drift.
Doing all this stuff and I thought I just thought oh my god.
Hope you don't have any hang-ups, get my drift.
God that sounds like the kids today. Get skimdalldibble.
God, so yes, I did have a really bad impression.
Terrible.
That was real depressed.
Well, phone is not your strong suit.
We found that out, Bob.
So now what happened?
Well, I went over, we decided to go skydiving.
Go skydiving?
Right, right.
Skydiving?
Yeah, first date.
On your first date.
Wow, pulling out the big balls there.
Skydiving.
That's skydiving.
I mean, it's an adventurous first date.
You want to get together?
Meet me at the airport.
Yeah.
You want to get together?
Meet me at the airport.
No, not that one.
The one in the field with the 30-year-old plane.
I'm going to jump out the back of it.
Now, have you ever done this before, Linda?
No, I never have at all.
So just a first date on a love connection.
Great.
Let's go scumming.
That's kind of an...
Yeah.
Chuck can't believe it.
I can't believe it either, too.
By the way, what do you talk about when you fear for your life?
How are you getting to know somebody?
I assume he came to your place, did he?
Did you form a different impression? Yes, I was walking down the stairs
and he had his back to me and then he turned around
and he described himself in the worst way possible
because he turned around and he looked great,
he had big blue eyes and he was smiling
like a nice, normal, happy guy.
So I thought, okay, maybe this can work.
I don't know what you're seeing.
I'm seeing like mass murderer vibes from this guy. I don't know. you're seeing. I'm seeing like a mass murderer vibes from this guy.
I don't know.
Looking forward to the skydiving.
So my spirits went up.
And what'd you think of her when you saw her?
Oh, she looked great.
Pretty eyes, pretty hair.
When have you seen her in a parachute?
Oh, absolutely.
Okay, so.
Exactly what I was thinking, Chuck.
Wait till I see her wrapped up in a parachute in my trunk.
You're going-
So we drove on out to the desert.
That's where they do the skydiving.
And she, you know, the whole way out.
You think they do it over the ocean.
They just give you a second chance.
Well, yeah, or over LA.
Yeah.
But I got out.
You get to the airport, I guess.
Right, and you know, you don't get there
and jump right on the plane and jump out.
There's a lot of time where you just sit and do nothing.
So for like three hours.
Lucky you had a date.
Right, yeah. We had, they had a date. Right. I'm having a hard time connecting on a human level with
you Chuck. So we actually sat around the pool. We sat around the pool and she took her shirt
off and uh. I didn't know. Oh hey now. Alright this is getting spicy. I like this. Well now you made it sound like she took her shirt off and there's nothing underneath come on.
She had like a little top on.
What Olinda?
I had a top on a tank top and I had a sweater a cardigan over it it was 110 degrees so I was wearing shorts and I had this little tank top on and I took my cardigan off.
It was little off. It was
Let me describe it nipples hanging out everywhere. Oh Chuck if you could have seen excuse me, Oh Linda We're talking for a second. The men are talking. Oh Chuck. I had a man Johnson the size of
the desert sky
But you're sitting around the pool and... And uh...
There's nothing personal. I heard you cough back there, Alinda.
He didn't mean you had a little top. He meant that the top was little.
Right, right.
There may be no good way out of this.
You know what I mean.
What?
Chot's hair looks like the wolf man.
I know. His hair is so done.
It's sticking up a foot above his head.
Head of the side.
I know, and it's got like this, I don't know,
like this porcupine look to it in the back.
Just sitting there and her back was to me
because I was wandering around,
trying to get into trouble.
Trying to see her top.
And so I saw her sitting there and I walked over to her
and I put my hands on her back
and I just felt her just melt.
Yeah, man. It was... Oh! It felt so good. walked over to and I put my hands on her back and I just felt her just melt.
It felt so good. It was the best thing since my last murder, Chuck.
You know what I'm saying? This is a bizarre day. Let's, let's break this down for a second. Okay.
First of all, I mean on the love connection, then, uh,
he has a bad impression with the sister then comes picks her up or they're going
skydiving. Um, they drive to the desert where there is a pool.
There's a pool at the airport.
Yeah, she takes off her shirt, then he's walking around trying to get into trouble. And then
he decides to come over and give her a massage.
Yeah, he's trying to see underneath her tank top is probably what's happening. And then
he goes and gives her a massage like this is weird I don't think I don't think this would fly in today's day and age but you never know I
mean you know if you're really into somebody I guess maybe this is a correct
assessment of what may have happened to Linda I think that's that arrogant thing
coming out it was really nice you came behind me gave me a little back massage
but I don't I think I was melting because it was 115 degrees. Maybe a little bit.
So now let me ask you something.
You guys are, you got a lot of time
before you jump in the airplane.
This is kind of like your father spanking you and saying,
oh, wait a few hours and think about it.
You know what I'm saying?
What?
Your father's spanking you?
Why are you talking about Chuck?
Ha ha ha.
The producers are probably going crazy right now. They're like, uh, Chuck. Chuck. Get out of...
Chuck! Chuck! Get out of this!
Chuck!
Is he getting a little nervous about it? Are you nervous?
Is it your first jump?
My first jump.
We were really nervous. He was so nervous. He was running all around the place because he couldn't sit still and
he was, you know, going into every building and trailer and jumping up and
down and... See, I would think that in order to suggest this as a first date, you have
done this. I would think that if you were even thinking about skydiving, it's
something you would do all on your big boy self. Or with somebody you love or trust or whatever, your best friend, not a first date.
No.
I mean, I can't even believe she said yes.
No.
If I had never been skydiving, not with someone I didn't know.
No, thanks.
I mean, I did do it with someone I didn't know.
I actually got on the back of someone I didn't know or they got on the back of me or however.
Well, right.
That was the tandem.
That was a tandem jump, but this is a little strange for a first date.
But it was a fun sort of nervous. So it was good.
So now you get on the airplane.
Well, you get on the airplane, you go up to 12,000 feet and you just jump out.
Just jump out.
Great description. Thanks. You want to drag that out a little bit more?
Give us a little bit more connoctante.
We get on a plane and get up there and just jump.
That's it.
Thanks, Chuck.
Bye, everybody.
Good night.
And it's awesome.
Seems like there should be more to it than that, doesn't it?
It's awesome.
You're on the ground before you know it.
You free fall for like 60 seconds and you're just, it's just over.
So you free fall for a whole minute.
Right.
It's incredible.
How much does this cost to do this?
About 150 a person. 150 a person. A little more than we gave you isn't it?
How much do they give them I don't know there's a date budget
It's not even 150. Yeah, not even 150. It seems like a not a lot of room for maneuvering there
There any romance going on here before or after the job right before we jumped I jumped I walked over to her and I kissed her and I wished her luck.
Well it may have been your last kiss in life so yeah.
Yeah that's what I'm thinking like what?
And he wished her luck. Good luck. I hope I see you alive later.
Good luck. I hope you have life insurance for your parents. Good night.
I trusted my uh...
I was going to murder you but I figured this is the better way to go.
Instructor then. Yeah well your instructor has nothing to do with a shoot open now. You're absolutely yeah, so after the jump
Everything's great, and you loved it right
But now is there any is it get any more romantic?
Well we get down and we decide to have a few drinks and just kind of kind of get the nerves out of us
You know we were hands were shaking was like you're on five all those nerves is you know strong drink
So we're in we're inside and you know, we're drinking
and it's still out at the jump site.
Right.
Look at the place at a bar.
What is this?
Where is this?
I wish I would have done my plane jump out of this place.
I got a bar and a pool and hot chicks hanging around.
Trailers you can jump in and out of.
I don't know what's going on here, it's awesome.
I give her a kiss, you know, and she kisses me back.
You know, no hesitation whatsoever.
She just leaned right into it.
He's telling the story and she's like giving looks,
like not exactly how all this happened, Chuck.
And uh.
So how did the date end?
Well, it was a long day so I drove her up to her place and she got out of the car and
we kissed goodnight and I said, see you on the show, you're a great gal and I hope to
see you again.
Good.
And that's about it.
It was a great date.
It was a great time.
I thought you were going to get shot down in flames, Bob.
I swear I did.
Yeah, I thought so too.
I could have swore also.
Surprise, I'm happy for you.
Let's take a look and see the audience.
Right over here. Oh, they chose Olinda.
53%.
You think it was Ascrow out in the second date? Of course he will.
So you want to ask her out, we'll help supplement your date, Olinda.
We're going to climb the face of Mount Everest!
We're our second Dane.
Mount Kilpinjaro.
We're going scuba diving to the Titanic.
Who would you like to go out again?
I'd love to.
Come on out, Olynda.
Oh, it was all up there.
Oh, Oswald and Enzo. Oh, she's very short.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I didn't expect that.
So now, would you do this again?
I would do it again. I had such a great time.
You would.
I would.
I recommend it.
Now let me ask you, after you did your skydive,
because I've never done this,
after you did your skydive, did you sit done this, after you did your skydive,
did you sit there and think,
well let's go up and do it again right now?
Oh absolutely, oh you did?
I did, but he got sick.
Oh, oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Yes.
He did?
Oh my Joe Bob, yeah.
Yeah.
He's not different in person.
I'm sure, thanks for coming on the show,
we enjoyed having you.
Oh, you two love birds.
I wonder if they're still together.
I love it. I wonder if they're still together.
I doubt it.
Bob seemed like a real asshole.
I don't think she's gonna stay with it.
I just don't. But who knows?
You never know. Sometimes I try and find
the follow up on these people. Like, what are they doing now?
There's people like Brad
Grundenberg, who wanted to be in entertainment
in the first place. So they're out there.
They've done stuff, you know, he's a podcast
He's got a podcast. He had a podcast or whatever and then there's people that are really hard to find
I will tell you that most of the people
Most of the love connection videos that you find are put up by the people themselves who went on
Like this was my time, you know, this is when I went on the love connection
But I guess that's how it works
Like, you know, I don't know that there the Love Connection. But I guess that's how it works.
Like, you know, I don't know that there's a lot of demand for the Love
Connection on YouTube.
Some of them have hundreds of thousands of views.
It just depends.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That one guy who sometimes we use the clip of who's like, I do it all day long.
You know what I'm talking about?
That guy, he's got, there's millions of views on that.
I like to think of ourselves as the reason why
That was a gem that was a gem that was our first
You never forget your first kids never forget your first
Alright, Chrissy and I are just a month short month away from being in Dania point to Dania Beach
Oh my god, Brian
from being in Dania Beach... oh my god Brian! I cannot get that right. I cannot. Dania Beach Improv on the 24th of September we
would love to see you there. Tickets available lots of different places on
the website of the Dania Beach Improv itself. There's a link in the show notes
down below. You can find it on our website. You can go to Instagram.
Link in bio.
Please go buy yourself some tickets.
We would love to see you.
If you do buy your tickets, let us know.
212-433-3822.
That's 212-433-3TCB.
We can't wait to see you there.
And we can't wait to see you the very next night
at the Orlando Funny Bone, at the Bone. We're gonna be there and we can't wait to see you the very next night at the Orlando Funny Bone at the Bone.
We're going to be there and you can also get your tickets in the same places I just mentioned.
Don't buy from any scalpers.
We're trying to charge thousands of dollars for the commercial break tickets.
You can get them pretty cheap.
At the commercial break on Instagram, TCB podcast on TikTok and youtube.com slash the commercial
break. Oh, tcbpodcast.com. I forgot to mention the website. Okay, Chrissy, that's all I can
do for today.
I think so.
But I'll tell you that I love you.
I love you.
Best to you.
Best to you.
Best to you out there in the podcast universe. Until next time, Chrissy and I always say,
we do say and we must say.
Goodbye.
Goodbye. We do say, and we must say, Goodbye! Thanks for watching!