The Commercial Break - I'm Gonna Get You!

Episode Date: December 3, 2021

Bryan is still battling Salmonella many days later and his brain is suffering the effects. He struggles through show as Krissy reminds him she tuned out years ago! Bryan's children are speaking more Spanish than he is and he senses the threat is real. Bryan recalls his favorite Tele-novella and Astrid drops some obscure Spanish words in the studio for the team to discuss. Finally, Bryan reveals he has been watching Curling in preparation for the Olympics and the gang reviews some other professional "outsider" sports taking the world by storm. Tag Your It, Pro Marble Racing, Cornhole and Balloon Keepe Upee are all new but popular random pro-sports highlighted. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

And welcome back to WSHIT's continuing coverage of Crabapple Hike Schools drive to the Southwest regional soccer finals. How exciting is this moment and in an effort to make sure that every Crabappleian can hear and enjoy the excitement along with us we now offer the broadcast in a Spongebob on WSSHIT 2. We'll now tune into that coverage live in the last remaining minutes of this regional championship. تتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتتت We're gonna allow our reporter, Ungregated, take a breath and we'll be back after this On this episode of the commercial break, because now she can say things to them that I may or may not be able to respond to or may or may not understand.

Now, just to be clear on where I stand with my Spanish, I took two years of Spanish in high school. I then spent a lot of Spanish in high school. I then spent a lot of time in Spanish speaking countries. I have friends who speak a lot of Spanish, their family speaks Spanish. For almost all my adult life, I have been around Spanish. And I've watched television programs in Spanish.

So I understand quite a bit of Spanish. Unless they are speaking, someone speaking ultra fast, or they're speaking on top of each other, which is every Spanish situation ever They always are talking over each other Dulse show someone like I was watching the women the other day right the qualifying for the US team and she let that she'll let the rock oh What? What? What? What? What? What? And in the back she was ever to spare It's tag master boy in the brain Also known as tag back master

Here comes Brian to his signature sound I'm going to get you Oh, I'm going to get you Oh, I think it's ready I'm going to get you! I'm going to get you! Look how his computer grumbles in fear as he knows the pain is coming once he hears I'm going to get chew! Ha ha ha ha ha!

The next episode of the commercial break starts now. Ah! That's another episode of the commercial break! I'm Brian Green, this is Chrissy Holi, and best of you, Chrissy! Best of you, Brian! Best of you out there in the podcast universe. How the hell are you? The commercial break, the one and only. That's all you need. The commercial break.

So if you're leaving us a review on Apple Podcast, make sure you're leaving it under the commercial break. And it'll alternatively, if you want to leave a message for the other commercial breaks out there, go to their page. Don't leave it on ours. We got yet another comment that's clearly having nothing to do with our podcast. But that's okay. He was talking about how the stock market goes up or down or something like that.

And I'm like, how do we stop this shit? I guess we can. I think we've kind of nipted in the bud for the most part. Yeah. But it still remains. And so there you go. That's another good comment. Yeah, another good, yeah.

Listen, we got a good review. Yeah, we got five stars. Okay. Okay, we got less than five stars on Apple. We actually have a five star review. Yeah. And I think that's just wonderful. So thank you very much to everyone who takes the time

to do that. Remember that you can get your TCE stickers by leaving reviews and go to the website to figure that out. You'll find out more about that later on in the show. I no longer do the liners in the show, Chrissy, because I realize that we were wasting sometimes 20 to 25 minutes of the show. I know I was talking about it.

I know you were. I knew it. And I would just drone on about this and about that and about everything. Yeah. If there's something important that you need to know, go there. Whatever he said.

Yeah. You're like mostly other. Whatever he said. Yeah. You're like mostly other people in my life. Yeah, I'm with stupid. They're like mostly other people in my life. They just tune out at some point. And probably most of the listeners too. So thanks for joining us. We certainly appreciate it.

And if there's anything important that you need to know, you'll hear it right before the commercial break in the commercial break. Odd the enough, there you go. So if you listen to long enough, you know we have commercials and we have a commercial break for it. So Chris was just showing me that there was yet another spam phone call where it says potential spam, if you have an iPhone and Verizon and stuff like that.

It happens all fucking day and now at night. Like who are, who's the spam? One time I sometimes when I try to pick up, there's nobody there. Most of the time. Everyone's in a while, and I'm like, well, who is this? Let me just pick it up.

Hello. Hello. They're testing your phone number, right? And it is like, yeah, you know what I mean there. I think they test you. If you answer, then you get put into yet another. I didn't even realize. And it's just a big marketing funnel, right? And they go like this.

And they're usually trying to sell. Lots of them call me about my student loans. I don't have any student loans. Well, and yeah, the car repair, the car repair, the car repair or stuff. Your warranty is about your expire or my favorite. We will send the FBI to your door.

If you do not call us back by 3 p.m. today. FBI doesn't call. They don't knock. They just come in. Number one, no, yeah. Yeah, listen, I got, yeah, I'm not worried about answering my phone if I'm worried about the FBI coming in my door. Apparently there was a juror scam that was going on because you know, I think I told you this. I told the listeners, but I was called Summend for jury.

Yeah, yeah, we did talk about it a little bit. Right before Mimpo. Right before Mimpo. A day before Mimpo. The day before I was supposed to leave for Mimpo. Yeah. I was summoned and then selected. Yes. And I had to postpone to leave for Mimpo. I was summoned and then selected. Yes.

And I had to postpone the trip to Mimpo because I had to go into court every day. It wasn't even something that great. It was a property dispute. Yeah, that's it. It turned out to be a hung jury. We couldn't convince this one woman. Unbelievable. You know she was paid off.

I think so. Yeah, of course. But however Brian, listen to this. As of this past week I got another so you got another jury something that quick wow that quick on but you know you just say no I well you don't you you have to kind of go through it Yeah, you have to go the process now, but I went to the website and I saw that's where there was the potential jury scam

They were alerting people saying what's the jury scam? Well, I guess it was you you show up somewhere and they rob you. No Show up in the go-knot they take your money That's actually good. Yeah, that's what a bad one. Yeah, no, it was that people were being called Yeah, and they were saying hey, you've got to show up or we're gonna send people out after you pay us some money I guess to or some money. I don't pay us some money because you missed during the duty. Yeah, so that was a scam. However, I did get out of this next.

Okay, good. That means that we don't have to worry about our schedule here at TCB. The schedule never stops here at TCB. Hell or high water or selmanella food poisoning, jury duty, whatever. We keep on trucking here and I continue to be sick with Salmonella, which is just unbelievable on day number whatever, but But the good news is is that this has left me plenty of time to dig deep into the internet and get lots and lots of content for the show Yeah, so it's kind of been a blessing in disguise that I've had to slow down a little bit. You're still for lining Yeah, I like to think of it. Yeah, I also lost 20, oh, I'm going on 15 pounds now.

Thank you, guys. So it's just, I can't, a holiday diet. I told my, one of my business partners, I said, I lost all the weight I was going to gain. So now just be even by the time, I'll be back to fat kind of once it goes there. One of the things I have realized, thanks, I appreciate it. Yeah, okay. You've been great before too.

Yeah. I would have said it to you. I'm, I would have said it to you. I'm you would have said it to me before I think so you Or you would have said you could stand to lose five or ten I don't know if I would have I think you would we don't have that kind of relationship. We don't you know I know you're not you know You have that relationship my wife. I mean, you know, that's the only person you really should be asking Sometimes my brothers give unintended advice right? They're like like, hey man, you've gained some weight. They go fuck yourself. I mean, I definitely gained weight during the pandemic,

but it feels like I looked beautiful and he loved me. The way I was. I have learned in now my 29 years of life that you've weight is going to fluctuate. That is going to happen. You're going to have periods where you're changing bodies. Are changing bodies. And as you get older, it gets harder to lose weight and you put it on quicker. And when you have children, every life change comes with different circumstances.

And you have to give yourself a break sometimes and just say, well, okay, so you're not in fighting order. You're not in fighting shape. But you're alive and you have your health and, you know, and my kids have a beautiful life. I'm a lever, a lover now. I don't want to argue with my body. Yeah. I don't want to have all those arguments and disagreements with my body. I already have so many issues around food. You know, I've eaten so many weird things and I'd like to eat the odd times and sometimes I don't like people watching me eat.

I do so many odd things about food. I don't want to add like body dysmorphia into it because then I know I have a full blown eating disorder. Right now I just think it's hiding under the surface, but it'll explode someday. When I just, you know, sell manila. Yeah, you haven't eaten in 10 days, Brian. Listen, trust me. I'm not one of those guys who can go through

those water diets for 10 days. I have friends who do that. And Rafael does that. And he's this fucking unbelievable to me. Yeah, but he's a bear on day number eight, and he'll readily admit this. He's like in a full blown ass clown at day number days like It's like he did eat something. Yeah eat chew on something and then you'll feel better

Your body's not supposed to go 10 days without food But you know, he swears by it and that works for him. And so that's good One of the things that I am learning about my young Growing children I'm not gonna talk about in detail because I don't want to send them to therapy when they're older, but I'll say this. They're going there anyways. Yeah, they're heading there anyways. I'm their father, it's happening. One of the things that I have noticed recently, as I've spent a little more time in the house and on the toilet, is that those kids are starting to speak really good Spanish with my wife. And I see this as an existential threat a little bit, right? Because now she can say things to them that I may or may not be able to respond to or may or may not understand. Now, they're just to be clear on where I stand with my Spanish.

I took two years of Spanish in high school. I then spent a lot of time in Spanish speaking countries. I have friends who speak a lot of Spanish, their family, speak Spanish. For almost all my adult life, I have been around Spanish. And I've watched television programs in Spanish. So I understand quite a bit of Spanish unless they are speaking, unless someone speaking ultra fast, or they're speaking on top of each other, which is every Spanish situation ever. They always are talking over each other.

It's amazing. The Venezuelans will have 10 people around the table. And each person will be talking to two different people at the same time, and then multiple people will be having cross-conversations, and they are all understanding each other. It drives me fucking bananas, because as an American, I want you to stop talking when I'm talking

so that you can hear what I'm saying. What? What? Okay. Okay, don't say. So I have a hard time keeping up with the conversations in the house because there are so many people talking at one time and they're all talking over each other.

And that's just the way they talk. It's just the way they do it. On the television shows, they usually talk, you know, it's hard to do that. So they talk, you know people talking at one time and they're all talking over each other. And that's just the way they talk. It's just the way they do it. On the television shows, they usually talk, you know, it's hard to do that, so they talk, you know, one at a time. Do you watch the telenovelas? I have watched a number of telenovelas. Actually, after I watched one together in 2018,

that I really, really loved. I loved it. And it was on every fucking night. Oh yes. And it went on for a Spanish spout. Yeah. It went fun for a fucking ever, right? It was like, you know, 300 episodes. And we watched it and we watched every episode together

and I just loved it. Now, we haven't found one that we quite like that much together. But it was, I loved it. I thought it was. We did the same things like we're over in the, you know. Yeah. Cheating, dying. Yeah.

This one was about a ghost. It was too bad. Nico. Nico. I don't. Yeah, one was about a ghost. It was too bad. Nico. Nico. Nico. Nico. Yeah, it was about a person, like a famous CEO who died and he came back as a bodyguard, right?

Like a bodyguard for the family, for his family, the person who just died. So he came back in this different body, but it was the actual CEO. So he was like a ghost inhabiting somebody else's body. And then alternately, this also happened to some other people in the show, right? There was other people who also had this, and it's about how he refalls and loves with the wife that he has. Only now he's in a much sexier, younger body.

Oh, the security guard body. Yeah, it was crazy. There was, you know, hot girls and small bikinis, all nine yards. You get a lot, the sensuous love scene. Night after night, it was really the same storyline, night after night, but always you were interested because it was well-acted and everyone was having

a good time, right? And, and after night, we're having a good time. So we just continued to watch it night after night after night. I think she was also pregnant during that time or maybe we had just had the baby. So it was like, you know, we didn't have a lot to do, except for watching this thing that came out at nine o'clock.

So I was talking to Astrid, and I was saying, I see this as a threat. You're gonna be able to speak to our children. Much more conversationally. What are you saying? And my son will be like, no more about that. We said this is good cheese on the tamales, right?

Astrid said, you need to get, I also took two years of Spanish with a private tutor when Astrid came here to the United States because I wanted to be able to speak to her family. And I can get around, and the more Spanish that's around, like when her family comes and spends time with us, the more I speak, the more the better I get. Sure, yeah.

It's a muscle memory, right? Yeah. But Astrid said, I've got an idea. depends time with us, the more I speak, the more the better I get. Sure, yeah. It's a muscle memory, right? Yeah. But Astrid said, I've got an idea. Why don't I give you some practice for the commercial break? Oh, nice. Why don't I give you five to ten words on a piece of paper? Okay.

And you see if you and Chrissy can figure out what it means based on your limited knowledge of Spanish. Okay. Now remember, I have basic conversational Spanish abilities to speak, and I have probably, I would call it, let's call it, intermediate understanding skills. Working knowledge. I have a working knowledge.

Like if you had a conversation with... I had a Latin in school, so. Jesus, who the fuck takes Latin? Why would you need Latin ever? And any circumstance? Well, the teaser was very very interesting It was a hot is that what you're saying? Okay, and I would say I need to go to the bathroom and he would give me a pass to the bathroom

And I would be gone for the whole entire period and come back So lad and mr. Coleman Mr. Coleman Mr. Coleman. I get all Mr. Coleman. Yeah. Yeah. And then I know a little bit of Italian, a little bit of Spanish. So it's gonna be good. Okay, you ready? So let's see if we can understand some Spanish.

Okay. Okay, the first word is L, I'm gonna spell it and then we'll try and say it, right? L-A-M-P-I-N-O. With the squiggly. Yeah, with the accent all over the N, which is N-E, right? N-yay, so. Lampinho.

Lampinho. Lampinho, right? Mm-hmm, does that mean lamp? I'm assuming that this means either lamp or lighting, lit, right? Okay, okay. Or, uh, alternatively, it could mean something completely different. Yeah, it probably does. I don't know, lays with the turkey or something.

One of the Spanish, that's the native American, lays with turkey. Your name is Antonio. Lays with turkey. Let's figure out what lamppino means. Should we do this together? Yeah, let me see. It means, hairless.

Someone with no hair or both. Lamppino. Lamppino. Lamppino. In my days where I also learned a lot of Spanish, which was as a restaurant tour, right? Because we had a lot of guys in the back. All of them. Everyone, everyone that was cooking your fantastic food,

spoke Spanish or was from Mexico or a South American country. And in some restaurants, even the head chef, right? Yeah. And they used to call me Pellones, Pellones, which meant Baldi. I think it meant Baldi, but then other people have told me that it was much more offensive.

Yeah, Lempinho and Pellones, Pellones, do not sound anything alike. Okay, I'm gonna spell this and then we'll try and figure out how to say it together here on the commercial break. AP, AP, AC, HR. So, A-pa, A-pa-cha-d. A-pa-cha-d.

A-pa-cha-d. And I think that means one of those reclining chairs that the dad sits in. And Thanksgiving. The lady-me. A-pa-cha-d. A-pa-cha-d. Yeah.

A-pa-cha-d. Either that or that is Spanish for Papa Roach the Band. A-pa-cha-d. Or Blink 182. Blink 18 Uh, a papachad Or blink 182 Blink 182, a papachad I think it means blink If you think it means blink, a papachad A papachad

And what I know of Spanish, it's not gonna mean blink or sitting chair It means to cuddle Hug Embrace Or caress A papachad A papachad, baby I just popped a jar right now now you know what I'm saying

We did not even come close on that one okay I like this game let's go okay EMP A-L-A-G-O-S-O. Empala gozzo. Empala gozzo. Empala gozzo. To drive. I actually know with this me. No, money heart is to drive. Money heart.

Money heart. To drive. To go somewhere driving in a car, right? Is money heart. And the money handle. I think that a papa in palagos you got to say with the accent I'm a palagosso if you're gonna be Spanish I'm a palagosso.

A palagosso. You got to, yeah, they don't say the rest is, they say it. I could be that. Yeah, a pizza. A pizza. We're going to a pizza. Rachel this is for you. You watch it.

Pizza. Who is Rachel? Yeah, a pizza. She was just a coaster. I know. She's that Rachel. She's a wild one. I'll tell you what. Yeah. She, uh, who knows what's going on down there? Yeah. But our good friend Rachel McGrath was posting videos of her down in Costa Rica. Oh, yeah. They were amazing. They were wonderful. They were

highly entertaining. I'd love you, Rachel. She had a video. She wrote in like a helicopter workly thing. Like, uh, yeah, one of those two-seater helicopters. Yeah, she had a dinner that was made by what she was calling a Cut famous Costa Rican chef. Uh-huh. The Costa Rican chef was in short shorts like booty shorts a tank top to here was so mussely Had long hair and makeup on and it was a man Yeah, and he was like I'm going to make some food for you! Oh, Rachel! You know, I got salt and pepper and all the things.

Oh, I bet it was a good one. Oh my, it was a good video as well, it was. Yes, I have seen it. This is the most entertaining chef I've ever seen in my entire life. He was prancing around, just like throwing salt everywhere. I love it. It's perfect for Rachel.

It's exactly where I imagined Rachel would eat in Costa Rica. In Palagoso is the name of the chef that Rachel met down in Costa Rica. That's what it is. It's in Palagoso. In Palagoso means a hard-headed person, someone who is stubborn. I'm not saying, that's my guess. No, that's my guess. That's my guess. Stubborn person.

And palagoso, like you're an palagosto. It means when something is disgustingly sweet. Disgustingly sweet. Disgustingly sweet. Like, uh. Just two sweet. Like those cakes they make at publics when they put a ton of fucking frosting on it.

Yeah. Why do you put so much frosting on my cake? Or the margaritas that Chili's doing happy, yeah? Oh, so sweet. God, give you a heartburn. Impala gozo, that is impossibly sweet. Uh huh. Okay, ready?

CHI Embobio, C-I-A-B-O-C. Embob. Embob, cimba. Cimba, I haven't even know what cimba means. Well, okay. But you take a guess. I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say,

I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, like a man's life. Oh, a chimbo. Like a chimbo, like that fucking chimbo. You know, he's out there cheating. He's a chimbo, a chimbo. He sleeps with everybody.

A chimbo, what are we Italian? By the way, I always call my children bambinos in Spanish and my in laws make fun of me. I feel like that's not Spanish, bambino, where are you getting that? And I'm like, oh look at the long bambinos. Okay. That's a long explanation.

In Venezuela, lousy, cheap. In Venezuela, this means a lousy, cheap, or generally bad, covers all spectrums up to and including sad, but also boring. So you can use it with low quality stuff or friends that are too lazy or sometimes I'm thinking like that. So a chimbo is basically, oh, it means like a,

like I guess it means like it's it's not good like it's a For quality find like a theme here too because Erilis Cuttle and brace somebody who's disgustingly sweet and then a Chimbo This is knockoff. He's a like Man Bimbo. VA, I, and A, Avaña. Avaña is a vagina. Answer that one thing too. Yeah, it's a vagina, but it's a valaña.

And that's how they say it. I think that's how Venezuela is saying it in English. It's a Vahania. Look at it in Vahania. It's also made of a high-atleharnia. It's the most useful and versatile word across the entire Caribbean because Vanya can mean anything from objects to situations. It's equivalent to the word things in English.

Look at the Vanya. You see the Vanya over there? It's... The rabbits are Vanya. It's...it's... The rapids are behind us. It's in Palagosto! It's absolutely Chimba! Oh, Papa Chal! Okay!

Okay. Vahanya. Vahanya. Vahanya. Yes. Okay. You ready? Yes.

C-A-T-V-R-E and this I actually do Chevre Chevre Chevre That means idiot it means That's I news Chevre in Paragosto now where do I tell you an accent come from? It means amazing. It means great. It means everything's wonderful.

Jev, Jev, amazing. So you're like, you know, when you're in conversation, go, that's amazing, you know? You're saying Jev, but a Jev. I remember that one. We have no idea what we're talking about in Spanish. No, wait, no. No, so we,

Can I keep these? Yeah, of course. Yeah, I'll keep these. What are you gonna keep them for? Just to quiz myself. In flash hard. You're gonna, of course. Yeah, I'll keep these what are you gonna keep them for? Just a quiz myself You're gonna use a randomly yeah, well, Brian. That's Jeffrey You're gonna use those like I use my Spanish when people are here and I'm like Blano Dunday I have a pop-a-char

Okay, Dunday, I have a puppet jar. Come on stop. Come on stop. Yay! Oh, but you know. Wait a minute. I'll come out with, you know, for the sequestals, I'll say, of course, you know, for the sequestals. Like when people are talking, those talk to me, though, when I was in Spain and people

would say like, like they'd say a sentence to me, right? They'd be like, say something like, you know, oh, Brian, it's so nice to meet you. You know, how's everything going? It's so amazing that you're here for dinner. I'd be like, which means of course, which can be used at the end of any sentence and people would be like, oh boy.

Oh, it's a very good thing. Gracias. Achevres, I'm para por su. Yeah. Yeah, I just fake Spanish basically, but I can understand it. So when people do talk about me behind my back in Spanish and I don't like it. Hey everybody, it's the commercial break inside of the commercial break.

Go to tcbpodcast.com. If you'd like to find out more about Chrissy and I, you can read all the show notes, get our sponsors, special URLs and codes. You can listen to all the audio, you can watch all the video all from our website. And if you'd like to, you can drop us a line at 6612378296, that's 661, best the number two, yo! At the commercial break on Instagram, youtube.com slash the commercial break is the home of our brand new series, TCB in the studio. Content you cannot get through the audio version, so please go ahead and jump over there and subscribe. It'd be a great Christmas present to yourself.

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I was trolling on the internet. As you do. As I do. And I was the other day I was sitting in the bathroom, one of the many hours I've spent on the toilet for the last of the many hours I've spent on the toilet for the last however many days. And I came upon the first of the season, getting ready to go into the winter Olympics,

but the first of the season, and the winter Olympics is next year, right? Yeah, it is, 2020-22, yep. Because 2020, we're supposed to have the Olympics and we have the 2021 and now 22-22. It's also in China and 2022. I think also the Winter Olympics. We had the first of the season qualifying Winter Olympics matches, which was in one of my favorite sports to watch.

Like all the other stupid sports that we watch and the Winter Olympics curling. For those of you that don't know, curling is like golf. Yeah. What? Hot hot hot hot hot hot hot hot hot hot hot hot hot hot hot hot hot. don't know. Curling is like golf. Yeah. What? Like hot, hot, hot, hot, hot, hot, hot, hot, hot, hot, hot, hot, that's what you like to do. There, that's an actual job is to do that in front of your heart.

They rub this in. It's a, it's a stone. What's a stone? They're throwing a stone. For those of you that you have to have seen curling, I know you have, because it's that, becomes the fascination of every winter Olympics, because it is like watching fucking golf.

Yeah. Nothing happens quickly. Nothing really happens actually. Right. But people get points for doing something, right? And I love watching golf. So you know I'm into curling. Curling can be hours long matches.

What it is, is a flat sheet of ice. And on the end of the sheet of ice, there is a big bullseye on either side of the ice. And it's about, I'm gonna guess 25 yards from one end to the other, I don't know, I don't know, but don't say so 25 yards. And there are these big polished stones that have handles on top of them. They look like, yeah, they look like almost like tires, but they're not tires, they're stones. And they're about, like something you put on the stake, the grill. Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's, yeah, you take this handle, like something you would press I'm steak into, but it's now glued on top

of this very polished stone, it's granite, and it's shaped like a donut, right, or a tire. It's round. Yeah, and it weighs, I think it weighs like 25. It's like a donut or a tiger. Yeah. What? It's shaped like a rock.

Thanks for your saying it's round. A rock? What the? It's a thing, round. I think so, you're saying it's round. A round, what the? What the? It's a thing, you know, it goes to circular. Circular, sounds interesting. Say, can you fix my squads' hiles on the old horse and buggy? Brings down every time it flips. It's shaped like a dead at our time.

I have a master at describing things for the podcast. Round, around. Yes, it's a round. It's a round shaped object, but on the bottom, it's flat, right? But it's, yeah, it looks like a donut, right? It's on the bottom, it's flat. Okay, got you.

And then they stick this handle on top. It's like very heavy. It's 25 or something kilos. And they have these special shoes where they slide across the ice Yeah, for a few feet and then on as they kind of on their knees They slide the rock and they let it go ever so slowly trying to get the rock in a certain position on that bull's eye And then each team takes a turn and they can knock each other's you know rocks around or whatever It is the most ridiculous thing on it. It is honestly.

And what is the purpose of the person's coming, you know, and sweeping the ice as the stone comes down? That's a good question. It's smooth. So the one thing that you'll notice about curling that's probably most people will recognize right away is that there are as the rock is being let go, one person's throwing it or throwing the stone as the rock is being let go for that 75 feet, there are often two people that are in front of it with these brushes. And the brushes, they rub the brushes really quickly.

And by making the ice smooth, they can change the direction and the speed of the rock. So they can either make it smoother or they can make it rougher, depending on which kind of brush they have And so what the person who throws the stone will then direct the two people Running in front of the stone basically sliding in front of the stone with these special shoes that they have on Not ice gates. They're like shoes with like smooth surfaces

And what they do is they they will brush it in a certain direction Yeah, to try and get it to land exactly where they want it to land It's very weird and it's and it's like one of those sports that you just get entranced by. You kind of do. I love watching those. And this is what you'll hear. I was watching the women the other day, right? The qualifying for the US team and she let the, she'll let the rock go.

F, F, F, F, F. Oh, F, F, F, F, F. F, F, F, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, Six of 16 of these ice ice yeah courts or whatever you call and then people drink beer and they you know They so many people in the north are are really into this they it's a spectator sport. Yeah I thought to myself the other night Brian. This is the most ridiculous thing you have ever watched on TV And you love it so much, but then it got me thinking it's actually not the most ridiculous thing I've ever watched on sport, I've ever watched on TV. No, there's a lot more.

There are so many more stupid sports than curling in their professional sports. People making our professional leagues. I've noticed that people have now made anything a sport. Anything. Anything a sport. And there are whole channels dedicated to these weird sports ESPN now, ESPN, the actual channel, ESPN now has these going on at Saturday mornings and Sunday, you know, occasionally they used to throw in like

a bowling league on Sunday morning and you'd be like, oh, interesting, they got bowling on ESPN. Now they're doing like flip club and, you know, you know, I can go seek and like, all this crazy shit. I'm like, all of three, you're gonna have to go to fight each other. The winner gets $50,000. And she'll be the hide and seek champion. Oh yeah. So I started thinking, what are the dumbest sports that are currently can see, I have professional leagues,

like televised professional leagues. The qualification was, there has to be an actual sanctioning body, a league, right? That has rules and regulations and all that. It has to be televised or streaming, some things, some kind of live coverage. It has to have commentators, which I think then elevates it to an actual sport, right? It does. Because if you're just watching two idiots, you know, I don't know, throw darts at each

other's head, then that's not a sport. It's just two idiots throwing darts at each other's head. Yeah, the commentating is key. They have professional slapping. They have professional slapping. Professional slapping. This is a thing. Professional slapping.

You never seen this? No. Oh my God, we'll do a whole episode on this because this is crazy. Face slapping. Yes, these huge men slap each other, open-handed, slap each other, and oftentimes they just knock each other

right on the ground. They fucking knock out. But it's a thing and it's a sport and they do it for money. It's crazy, right? But I wanted to focus on, and there is commentators and money and sanctioning bodies in this slapping sport, too. There are rules and regulations. I don't know, fuck they get to the bottom of this shit.

But when I was a kid, like I'm sure you did with your siblings, we used to make up all kinds of sports. We were doing all kind of things. Yeah, you know me. And retain yourself. That's right. We would take the bike and you had to throw the ball in the garbage can while you were riding down.

Or if it was a rainy day, then we'd have some stupid thing we were playing with a soccer ball in the house. Like, if you kick the ball, if the ball, for building. Yeah, that's right. All kind of stupid shit. But these people took this shit and they made it into an actual sport

where money is exchanged. Okay. You ready? Yeah. Okay. First, I want to get to one that I thought was really interesting and probably the most boring of the, let's call these,

remember we were doing the music, friends, sports. We were doing Mark Ormley the other day. Yeah. And I couldn't remember with the name of the type of music that this guy would be classified as. It's called outside or music. Friends, sports. What were you doing Mark Gormley the other day? Yeah. And I couldn't remember with the name of the type of music that this guy would be classified as. It's called outside or music. Coming from the outside of the music industry.

And really from any kind of talent whatsoever. And just making up his own shit. Right. Sure. Let us call these outside or sports. Okay. These outside or sports. Outside of the MLB, you know, the ones that we all know. You have to be really weird to get in this category. And so I put four together for today

and I put a little commentary, a little clip of a commentary that goes on. So we might get a little taste of what's happening in these lakes. Okay. The oddest one that I found, the one that certainly is the most outsider, is marble racing.

Oh, marbles. Marbles? Marbles. Actual marbles. I know that when in 1930s or when you know Is the race marbles all time? It was like you know watching poem Marbles have been a thing for a long time. Oh, yeah, but never has anybody tried to make money off

I mean, you know, I had marbles But I didn't even know what to do with them when I was a kid. I did a little bag You just held them or you threw them around and thought they were pretty or whatever right But in the 30s and 40s and 50s, kids used to play games with them. Yes. So this is marble racing. This is an actual race.

Okay. There is a piece of board that is smoothed out in waves. Okay, so imagine like a table, but a wavy table has waves. The waves are numbered, one through 10. Each wave is numbered, one, two, three, four, five. The marbles are set up on a little plate up at the top, imagine it's coming down a little ramp

and then it's going over these waves, right? They set, strategically set their marbles on this board at the top and then the board is released and then the marbles roll down the ramp and onto the waves. They're trying to see how far, how many waves they can crest on this wood track without going to the very end, which is the pit. And then the marble will fall on the pit. It can't go on the pit. It can't go on the pit. It can't go on the

pit. It can't go on the pit. It can't go on the pit. It can't go on the pit. It can't go on the pit. It can't go on the pit. It can't go on the pit. It can't go on the pit. It can't go on the pit. It can't go on the pit. It can't go on the pit. It can't go on the pit. It can't go on the pit. It can't go on the pit. It can't go on the pit. It can't go on the pit. It can't go on the pit. It can't go on the pit. It can't go on the pit. It can't go on the pit. It can't go on the pit. It can't go on the pit. It can't go on the pit. It can't go on the pit. It can't go on the pit. It can't go on the pit. It can't go on the pit. It can't go on the pit. It can't go on the pit. It can't go on the pit. It can't go on the pit. It can't go on the pit. It can't go on the pit. It can't go on the pit. It can't go on the pit. It can't go on the pit. It can't go on the pit. It can't go on the pit. It can't go on the pit. It can't go on the pit. It can't go on the pit. It can't go on the pit. It can't go on the pit. It can't go on the pit. It can't go on the pit. It can't go This is a sport. People get paid to do this. And there are spectators and there are commentators in Marvel Racing. Do you want to hear a little bit of Marvel Racing? Yes, let's do it. And we get two in the catch basin, but it's one a piece. And this is actually a closer battle than what we thought. What exactly did you think about Marvel? That's my question. So let's hear the truth.

Well, the prognosticators had this one all wrong. The Red Marbles are clearly doing much better than the Blue Marbles. I thought the Red Marbles were really, really shaped for this competition. But as you can see, I don't know they had a long night out of the office last night. I think the Blue Marbles are steroids. They're on steroids. It's a fucking marble. How does it... They're all way the same. Yeah.

How does one do better than the other? I don't know, I don't understand this. Momo will move on No more rollers and the jungle jumpers The jungle jumpers have lost one in the back both teams lose one in the catch basin But look at those two rolling around for the rollers in the tennis box Come on really The he hasn't made it to Joe Buck level. I think this guy is like the

intern. He's also the president in CEO of the professional moral associations. My assumption. And with a name like jungle jumpers, we can imagine that the average age of the player here is probably 13 or 47. One of either way, these players are still living in their parents' houses. I'm just guaranteeing that. Yeah, that four really hurt the jungle jumpers. They lose by six in run, two of 12. Primary and balls of chaos up next. Balls of chaos.

Balls of chaos. I can just see some of that. Wasn't that your nickname in high school? It was, balls of chaos. It's my name in this current marriage. Balls of Chaos. Balls of Chaos. Balls of, I can see the guy, like, remember that guy from,

you know, the movie, you know. It never fuck with hit a Balls of Hases or whatever. What's that movie called? The Big Lebowski, you know. Don't fuck with the Hases, you know. But Jesus, and he's like rubbing his balls. I can see the guys got this, you know yeah. You know, don't fuck with the Hesos, you know, with Jesus, and he's like rubbing his balls. I can see the guy who's got this, you know. He's like, don't fuck with the balls of Fury or whatever your David.

What's that for my balls? These guys would take their marbles very seriously. As down they come the waves too strong for several. This is an interesting strategic event that some of the marbles they've kind of been scratching their heads on how to approach this. Do you want to sacrifice a back marble in order to give you the necessary push to get farther into the waves?

Oh, so like one marble could push another marble? It's all happened so fast, I just don't know. It's all so boring. The mountains, yeah. Like if you, there's a tray. That tray has four lines up, four lines across by four lines down. Yeah. And there's a whole, you know, a little marble holder.

They can place their marbles going back and forth one at a time. I guess determined by a coin toss. I have no fucking clue. And they can place them where they want to on that tray. Yeah. Then the tray is released and the marble Stark to roll. I guess the only strategy here is where do you place the marble on that tray in order to get the maximum potential roll?

And how does one ball fall after the other ball? The reality is, this is a complete game of chance. Like there is no rhyme or reason to how a mark, I mean, I guess there's physics involved. Yes. And you might understand physics, but you really have to take this a stretch to call this a sport. I mean, you really do. What exactly what physical exertion is being had here? I don't know.

But marble racing is the thing. And a thing that is watched by 20 to 30,000 people every event Chrissy. 20 or 30,000 people. We can't get 20 or 30,000 people, event Chrissy 20 or 30,000 people we can't get 20 or 30,000 people isn't this fucking podcast Some teams are opting for that others have seen what happens exactly here that pushed and sometimes we too strong And you end up dumping several for zero that the hazers If you're gonna have a sport like marbles here Here's my opinion. You should have an announcer like Joe Buck. Because that's the only way you're ever gonna make this fucking interest.

Look at the red one coming down. Look at the red one coming fast. Look at the red one coming fast. Oh my god. It's gonna be a big hit. He's getting to have some of this. He's got some controversial one, right? It's shy. I don't't know looks like an Indian to me

Like say just like crazy stupid ramparts I've shit or whatever Balls of fury my ass I had balls of fury in 21 coming out of now I was fucking everything that moved. There's a cream for balls of Harry. Yeah, there's a what? That's a cream I got a cream for balls of Harry. Yeah, there's a what? There's a cream for that. I got a cream for that. Boy, see me afterwards. You don't know how to play marbles.

I'll show you how to play marbles. Re-zero. They need to cut a finger off if you don't win or something like that. It needs to be like real stakes involved. You know what I'm saying? Yes. Other people just get to pelt the leaves or with the marbles.

There's a paintball gown modified for marbles. You have to take three in the nuts. That's what I would want. Balls of, sure, balls of bruising. There's not a good way to move along. Okay, so that's not a good way to move along. I had to start slow and I'm gonna work my way up here. Are you ready?

Now, here's one that I didn't even know existed until I started actually looking. When I thought about it, I started coming up with lots of examples of things that I've seen on TV that are considered, they call them sports or on sports channels, but clearly, you know, might, might be hard. This one might actually be considered a sport. Okay. Because of the simple fact that there's much pure Physicality of this skill. I don't say enough skill, but it's physicality Yeah, and that is professional tag you're it. Oh, this has been going on tag your it tag Professional tag now let me try and explain and I'll put it up on youtube.com slash the commercial break And we're now gonna insert some pictures and videos into our

Into our videos on youtube.com slash the commercial break. So if we're explaining something and you like to see the visual of it, just go and check out the clip and then you'll be able to see it. There is a, let's call it 40 by 40 ring. That is encased in plexiglass. This isn't in a park somewhere like where? It's in an actual stadium. Now a small stadium, but a stadium, right? And they have put all kinds of,

what I would call obstacles around inside of this ring. They, there are bars, there are ladders, there are platforms, there are overs, there are under, there are all kind of things in the middle. And the whole goal is to see how long there are overs, there are unders, there are all kind of things in the middle. And the whole goal is to see how long you can stay away from the other person. That's the classic. Classic.

That's classic. So you get placed in one place and then you say go and everybody in the guy, the one guy is being chased runs, right? He goes through the, through this and up that and down this. It's like pop is it two people? Two people. Yeah, yeah. One chasing, one getting chased.

One, you know, one has the tag and one's giving it to the other person just like the old days. That's right. When it was out of school. It's like I remember it. That's right. So the whole object is to try and evade your, the other person by jumping all around, right?

It's like parkour Professional parkour, but the whole objective is tack because these guys are really in good shape because they got to do a bunch of jumping around and all over the place You ready? Yeah, here we go The final of World Shaste Shack. And it is the French versus the Americans, the American Shacing and Shacing Well set Rougi, hunting down Clemont du Maix from Starrst. Yeah, see, you know, this guy knows how to do it.

Yeah, now there's clearly a big live audience back there, right? Gleevehers gonna do the USA, chasing him down. Oh, tag your in again. By the way, these matches last less than 10 seconds. I'm sure. Because it's a 40 by 40 ring. There's not many places to go. You can't actually hide under something

that's gonna get you, right? There's no hiding places. It's just platforms and stuff. I'm gonna get you. I'm gonna get you. So they tell my children, I'm gonna get you. What if I was a professional tagger? And in the back she was able to spare its tagmask her boy and brain

Also known as Tag Bagmaster It comes Brian to his signature sound I'm going to get to you Oh, I'm going to get you! I'm going to get you! I'm going to get you! Look how his computer grumbles in fear as he knows the pain is coming once he hears It's just a touch it's just a touch just hand only yeah, if it was a baton Breaking arms like

What if you had a police scepter, whatever they call those things? Like a black jacket, you would just smack people in the eye. Oh, he lost an eye, but I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you. Strags fear. Tag, you are the heart of men.

Brian coming, it's striking fear and everyone in the arena. They know it's coming. There is the signature. I'm going to get you. $50,000. $50,000 and stay here. $50,000 for tag your it. Wow. God, I never even liked this game when I was a kid. It was so boring because it was just like we were in a big field. I'd be like, tag your it.

You've got to wipe each other. Yeah, I was a bit more brainy. Yeah. I liked games like, which girl can I kiss today? Yes. Chase 2, G&F remaining. At least running. Tag.

You're right. I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you. We will have a new name on the trophy. It might well be G&F. Ben Adelafi bouncing off the tilt at Q. Chase in, Setsuru, G&F guys down, but he was tagged anyway Now these literally these matches last for three to five seconds

Yeah, I think like it. It's almost over. It's not the most interesting it's fun to watch them bounce around But it's not the most interesting sport in the world that it lasts They're last so little time and there doesn't seem to be a lot of strategy to it except just try and like get away Actually that is a strategy. He's going to get to run faster. Chase Scree United of Aiding Zero All. Aferis Rune. David Spask and Celis goes up to the ridge looking at descendant descend on Banana Waffee's. In the wrong time, a call.

There is no escape air venting. Land is straight on top of the map. There is no escape air anywhere. Literally, you're trapped in a glass case. I don't know if they've been touched. We just realized how stupid this really is. If they put the grid, there are a whole arena floor of places to hide and stuff like that.

Well, that's what I was thinking. That would be awesome. They believe forest. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, where you could kind of hide Absolutely, now you're getting a bush and through the and through the hall are you in here? I'm going to You Like hungry Yes Remember those guys made a movie about tag they made the movie here in Atlanta actually Don Ham was in it and it was called tag

John Ham Jason Stadham. I mean, I'm not Jason Stadham Jason Bateman okay a bunch of people were in it right and it was called tag and it was about a guy a group of guys It's a true story a group of guys who have a life long game of tag going on and They have done this tag in And they have done this tag in birthing rooms, like while they've been having children, like one guy's having a child. In birthing rooms. Yeah, literally while there's a part in the movie,

that's a true part of the story. I have not seen this. That one of the wives of the men, as they grow up, right? They've started it when they were 13, as they grow up, they have children, they're all these life situations. And one of them men is in the middle of watching his child to get born inside of the birthing room.

That's somebody tagged him. And somebody tagged him. Somebody came in and tagged him. It's like, just taking it too far. Burn. Now, let's go to one that I'm sure most, that a lot of Americans who of a certain flavor are going to understand what this is

and maybe some other people won't. Cornhole. Oh, yes, I love Cornhole. I love Cornhole to us. A backyard sport, I think it's really interesting. I think it's fun. The drunker I get, the better I get. It's like pool and darts. The more drunk I get, the better I get and bowling. Yeah, bowling, true. But Cornhole, I never really considered a sport. It was just a thing you did in some of the backyard where you're waiting for the steak to be cooked or the cocaine to show up, right? One of the two.

Correct. Wait, so Cornhole is an actual sport now and it is high stakes, big money, sponsors involved. This is what's on ESPN,ly and Fox Sports South and Fox Sports. Regularly has this Champions League of Cornhole. Who are usually white men, there are men and women's leagues and mixed leagues and stuff like that.

But let's say for this particular clip, white men from the ages of 20 to 50 years old in Berkstocks. Sure, they're wearing Beats' heads phones. They're normally this is played with a lot of alcohol involved. You gotta understand, right? Yeah, normally.

Yeah, you've seen the Google Cornhole, it's a little hard to explain, but there are two boards set up at each end. It's bean bags, you throw it into a hole. That's it, you can slide them up the board and throw it into a hole, directly put it in there. There is a huge league that's going on that's got big money involved and it's being televised right Big money big money big money big money. No, am is no am is no am is

Okay, you ready. Yeah, here we go. We're gonna listen to a little cornhole now, ladies and gentlemen. Okay. Professional cornhole. Car boss, such a beautiful bag. Just spins it in. Car boss got such a beautiful bag. That's a beautiful bag. I like the right one better than the left one.

It's hanging a little bit lower. He's giving it a spin. He's giving it a spin. Give it a spin and watch it pop. It's a lot of downtime. It's an interesting two-tray. When you look at the doubles, it's a change in strategy, too. How do they decide who's going to be a professional sport? I'm waiting for him to say that like how do they decide to send me here in the middle of Milwaukee on a Tuesday afternoon? I was gonna say like where to is the these being played like you know golf is usually around very sunny places So these seem like they're played in I wanted to raise a professional cornhole or where would I go?

like Warren Holer, where would I go? It's the birth. No, it's the birth of the star. Somewhere in Nashville, Tennessee seems like a great place to start, or any backyard in Atlanta, Georgia. I think it's a Southern thing, right? Maybe, I don't know, who knows? I haven't been anywhere. Cornholes everywhere, I'm sure.

But it seems like a tailgating thing. Like that's where it started. It's just a tailgate game, right? Yes. And these guys, they have terms for certain type of things that call one an airmail and a slider and a pit shot and they're very technical about all this. And that's when you know things are getting serious, like you're moving toward a sport, quote unquote, is because they come up with terminology that's all its own and people

start taking it way too seriously. When I was playing Cornhole, you just threw the bag. If you got it in, congratulations, you got a point. That was it. We didn't have terms for the way we were throwing. Side arm, side slide. That's an air mail. That's an air mail.

The Devon Harbaw, Tyler Cobb, decided they were gonna line up this way and put a Harbaw against Greg Geary, who's been so hot this weekend. So, when, before every game is a coin toss, however, when's the coin toss can choose one of two things. You can choose where you and your partner stand, exactly locations, or you can choose who each player is going to play against. And then your opponent goes and stands where they stand, and you follow them accordingly.

Okay, you've already lost me here, bro. I don't give a shit. Yeah, you know what we do? You don't take it right side. I'll take it left side. Thanks, thanks. Come on, man. You're taking this way too seriously.

There is a coin toss. According to rules 7.6.7. I see decide. That I literally made up on my own. That's what it goes first. Yes, you decide who goes first. On what side of the board they go. On which side of the board they go. Like the wind's going to affect it. It's like it's indoors. Yes, you decide who goes first on what's out of the board. They go on which side of the board they go.

Like the wind's going to affect it. It's like it's indoors. What are you talking about? There's no, I don't think there's a distinct advantage. It's a corn hole. So in most cases when you're playing in doubles, playing in corn, assuming you're not dealing with any type of outside air, but of course the air mail in itself

is a lower percentage shot just to hit it. Cool. Cool bro. Not sure what you fucking said man, but yeah, sweet. You mind if I dab? Can you get the pizza tonight? You mind if I, dad, you mind if I, dad, cool, you cool with that? Cause I mean, you know, I don't know if you notice, but watching those bean bags flies, not really all that interesting.

I first watched this bean bag tournament, listened to the bean bag tournament. I should say it was not watching, but listening to the bean, to the cornhole tournament, when I was driving back from Indiana on Adderall. Oh, thanks. I put the beanbag tournament, I noticed it on it, too, in the morning. Yeah. And so I put it on, I put the audio on,

and I was listening to it, and I'm telling you what, I was fascinated, but I'm sure it was the drug stalking. I think it was not riveting. Good to see you, Jamie. Jimmy McGuffin regarded pretty much as one of the top intermailers. Oh my god Jimmy McGuffin would call him Jimmy McLovin. Jimmy McGuffin we call him Jimmy McMuffin. By the way, his nickname should be Jimmy McMuffin. He looks like he had a few of those for breakfast.

He's been the roundly considered as the best airmailer that it's ever lived. That's right. Literally in the six months we've been bullshitting about this sport. He's the best. Yeah, there's nothing to compare him to, but he's the top of the top.

Right. Bored. In the history of the sport, really. What is the history of the sport? There is not. That's one of them keeping track of Cornhole. Yeah, there is not. There's Cornhole tournaments, and that's it.

Come on, guys, get it together. Cornhole is not a sport. I'm just saying, it's not a sport. It's not, it's a fun hobby pastime. I agree. And like a lot of other fun hobby past times, I'm sure that this will get some traction, but I don't think this will ever be at the level of like,

the MLB or anything like that. I don't know, maybe you never know, I don't know. Do they do professional bachi? They do do professional bachi. In Italy, it's a big deal. Oh yeah, big deal. Why was on a bachi league for a couple of years? I was with you.

You were with me, weren't you? Yeah, I was with you. Well, some nights I was on a botchy league for a couple of years. I was with you. You were with me. Were you? Yeah, I was with you Well, some nights I was with you Yeah, other nights I was too hungover or already drunk to show up But we were in that botchy league. Yes, we were in the bottom. I think it depended on whether or not the girl I was kind of dating at the time was in that rotation because if she was and I usually wasn't out there And if she was that there then I or wasn't there then I was there It was fun and I can see how that would be kind of a precursor to now this this this cornel this cornhole thing. Yeah, by think botchy's more.

No, yeah, it is. Yeah, I think so. It's a hard ball. It's a hard ball. I'm not sure what I else where it's interesting, but it's just more fun to watch. That's my opinion. Okay, you ready? Yeah. The crem de la crem of silly sports currently being played is one that started during just the during the pandemic. This is the first professional championship or professional games at all of this particular sport. Two brothers, I think they're in Seattle. Two brothers have been playing in games since they were a little kid that a lot of kids with siblings or friends played. When you have a balloon that you blew up, not a helium balloon, but a balloon. Or helium balloon as it starts to die or

whatever, you play a game of keep up. And that means basically is that I will hit it once, I will put a punch it in the air and then you're the next person, now you hit it. You go back and forth and the person who lets it drop loses, right? And then if you want to keep score, you keep score. Two brothers were doing this at a whole nother level. They were jumping over couches, they were diving under tables, they were jumping all around. And their videos, Tix-Hock and Instagram videos and YouTube videos became extremely popular

over the pandemic because people found a new game that they could play at home with their kids or the kids could play or whatever. Sure, it's cheap and easy. Cheap and easy, there's nothing to it. You get a fucking balloon and you have a living room. If you've got furniture and a balloon, you can get done. Or if your friends have furniture and you have a balloon, a balloon costs $0.7 exactly.

With some hot air. So, some people in Spain took this to a whole nother level. The brothers said this should be a professional sport. Somebody should make this into a professional sport. And they did in Spain. Leave it up to the Spaniards. I like these guys gumption, right? Leave it up to the Spaniards. Now, just like we were talking about early in Spanish, Chrissy and I have no idea how to speak in Spanish. And this is all in Spanish, but I'm going to do my best to translate as we go along. Okay, you ready?

Aspania. Turno de España. Oh yeah. Turn'em in of Spain. Oh, yeah, tournament of Spain. Spain Uruguay, Spain versus Uruguay. I cannot believe this is a... Is that a family? Nope, he said, I cannot believe this is a sport. I'm actually feeding my family,

talking about balloons, that's what he said. Now, of course, they got to play each other's national anthem. So he said it's very important to play the national anthem to pretend like this is an actual sport. He said he's very nervous that nobody's buying the pay-per-view. He said something about John Frankesa. Okay. Okay. He said next time we're not gonna play these songs at every time. Okay. He said in the front comes Uruguay.

Okay now I want you to understand a little bit about this sport. Four walls, some furniture in the middle, one balloon. It's a recreated living room. A recreated living room with glass walls, right? So you can see in the middle. I've heard about this. Yes, and there are three official referees, dress like referees.

Three. There are two people in the room wearing helmets, two younger people, and a bunch of furniture. All the furniture has a sponsor. It's like Mentos or Volkswagen or whatever, right? They all have sponsors, way sponsored out. And the guys who are doing the announcing, I'm assuming are the guys who invested in this particular thing. There's like a 25,000 euro prize.

It's sure to cost a lot of money to put this television production on. It's pretty well done, right? It's not a YouTube video. It's pretty well done. It's a live event in an actual stadium. It's a tiny little stadium, but it's a stadium indoors. And then they have referees and they have instant replay. Now, I want you to keep this in mind

as we move forward. I'm like picturing somebody. That's literally what they're doing. They're like diving across. Oh, and I forgot to tell you the rules. You have to hit upwards or sideways. Right. You cannot hit in any motion-dont downwards. So if at any time the referees think that you're trying to hit it even like at an angle downwards, you get a point taken away. The other person gets a point. He just said this is awful. We shouldn't playicia! ¡Esta es el Uruguay! ¡Qué barbaridad de partidos! ¡Estoy nervioso al fredo! Yo también, yo también, y lo acabo de ver ahí

acabo de ver el tinte de el Uruguayo ¡Ete! Y se la han hecho de feclaros a mi sepa ¡Era guayo! Hasta que viera, pues, la verdad... ¡Bien, bau! ¡Bien, bau! ¡Rubio platico!

¡I'm going to get you! ¡Pero, martina, suerte mundial de gruos! I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you.

I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you.

I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you. I'm so nervous. I spent all my family's money on it They're hitting the ball. I'll put this video on YouTube. There goes the blue That's all you do. We're speaking over each other. Okay.

Okay, now, now, now. The game has stopped because someone thinks, because the referee thinks that it was hidden a downward motion. It looked like it went to the side, but it actually went downwards. Now, the whole fucking television program explodes. And I'll explain why. Let's just listen to him in the background. He's saying, no, he hit it under. He hit it under.

He hit it under. Like he's, he went up. He went up. Right. There are six commentators in the booth. Six, right? Ranging from young to old. All of them speaking over each other.

So you can't understand a fucking word. Six commentators. Like I said, I think these guys are all investors in this particular sport with one main guy who is a rather rotund Spanish man. Now what you're hearing is you're hearing the referee all three referees have now gone to the instant replay booths to see exactly if it went up or down but they don't really think this is happening so on the fly that they don't understand exactly how they measure that yeah, so The angle of the hand correct or the angle of the balloon, right?

Like if like that or it's a good that did you cup your hand right? Yeah, if it's anything other than this that's right So this is so bad Chrissy up up. Yeah, I know, but you can go sideways too. So it's like, you know, yeah. But it has to be middle. It has to be middle or curting. That's right. That's right.

That's what they're saying. But this is such a fucking mess that at the end of the day, the referees decide that he tried, he hit it sideways, right? They say we think he hit it sideways, so we're taking no points away. But one of the announcers is called over to make the final decision. Oh!

Now, imagine if in the ninth inning of the World Champion, if three referees can't get it right, call in the announcer. And a replay guy. And a replay guy. So they called in an announcer, like calling in the Joe Buck to make the final call a slide at the plate during the world

series. It's absolutely unbelievable. This is got to be the most ridiculous thing I've ever seen on entire life. But it was so fucking fascinating to watch these kids, you're not playing this balloon ball or whatever you call it and having balloon balls.

He's got nice sex. Joe McEuffin. Joe McLeven. The best. He's regarded as one of the best sac handlers that ever was and I'll tell you what, I've seen a few sac handlers in my time. Oh my God. I can go on. I can go on forever.

Sports that aren't quite sports that should be sports that aren't sports that might be sports. There you go, there you have it. There's a general recap. We got four of the 30 that I could think of. There's Chrissy tuning out as I do all the showliners. I know it. I know how she goes. All right, well listen, now I think we're, I've got all we've done enough today. I'm still babbling, Salmonella.

I'm still not feeling 100%. So if I sound a little muddlemouth today, that's why it's because I don't have any fluids in my body. And I want to thank everybody who took the time to like and comment on our recent videos. Go to youtube.com slash.commercial commercial break please check us out and subscribe we now have actual imagery so when we're talking about some of these clips they're actually on the YouTube channel you can see them right here where I'm putting my

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I want to thank all my good friends at Kassbox, Squatty Patti, all the wonderful people at Fuego Chips who have sent us a lot of chips at moon cheese who have sent us moon cheese? We're keeping us fed or keeping you fed at least. I'm just over here losing weight by the minute And I think that's it. We're gonna be back soon with another wonderful edition of the commercial break Season three brand new studio Season three, brand new studio, brand new content, brand new attitude, less listeners. That's the goal. More commercials, less listeners, you know, I'll go, we're gonna pretty soon the whole second half of the commercial break is just gonna be commercials. Well, that might work, you never know. People might be into that.

It's a name. Yeah, there's only YouTube channels that are dedicated to commercials and they do well, you know? We're going to need to start opening presents too. Opening like... Like, opening presents to get viewers. Let's do some unboxing. You want to do unboxing? Okay, we'll do a couple episodes on unboxing. We'll get some boxes that we can unbox right here.

We'll open our Christmas presents to each other. That might be a good idea. Or let's order some stuff on the internet and let's unbox it here like they do online, and we'll make it fun. Let's unbox a deal dough or like some KY jelly or something. Okay, I like that. We just came up with some TCB content. It did.

Look at that. Look at us working 24 hours a day, seven days a week for your pleasure. That's it, that's all I can do today. I love you. I love you. Best of you. Best of you.

Best of you out there in the podcast universe. Until next time, we always say and we always mean! Bye! The commercial break! New episodes on Tuesdays and now Fridays! New YouTube clips drop daily at youtube.com. Slash the commercial break! Visit tcbpodcast.com for access to our entire media library. Follow us at the commercial break on Instagram. Each episode is written and produced by Brian Green,

co-hosted by Chrissy Holtler, with additional content provided by Tina Cano. I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say you