The Commercial Break - Keeping It 100!
Episode Date: September 3, 2021Bryan and Krissy celebrate the unthinkable..100 episodes of this mediocre comedy podcast! Join the gang as they take some questions from the listeners, reminisce about the old days and play a game of ..." Do you know your TCB?". It may not be good, but it's 100! LINKS: Watch this episode on Youtube TCBTV-minus Sponsor FUM (Use Code TCB) Magic Spoon (Use Code TCB) MEMPHO Music Fest (Oct 1st-3rd 2021) Subscribe to The Commercial Break Podcast Youtube Channel New Episodes on Tuesdays and now Fridays everywhere! Text or leave us a message: 1-(661)-BEST-2-YOU  | (1-661-237-8296) FOLLOW US: Instagram: @thecommercialbreak @bryangcomedy @tcbkrissy ClubHouse: @bryangreen @tcbkrissy ClubHouse: The Commercial Break Club on Clubhouse! (home of live recordings) Twitter: tcbbryan Facebook: The Commercial Break Podcast YouTube: Youtube.com/TheCommercialBreak Email: info@tcbpodcast.com A Chartable Top 100 Comedy Podcast #1 Trending Comedy Podcast Worldwide! (Chartable) #1 Trending Comedy Podcast U.S.(Chartable) An Apple Top 100 Comedy Podcast Top 1% Downloaded Podcasts, Worldwide (ListenNotes) A Hot 50 Podcast (Podcast Magazine) Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
Transcript
Discussion (0)
And welcome back to WSHIT's Focus on Your Health.
Of course tonight's focus is going to be Turkey measles, all over Krabapple Township.
One of the worst outbreaks this township has ever seen and we have seen some Turkey measles.
We invited WSHIT's special medical correspondent and the Pre-Eminent expert on Turkey Measles,
Dr. Alexander Equestrian.
Dr. Recently you've shared on Facebook some brand new breakthrough medication that you believe
make sure the Turkey Measles.
How exactly did you make this discovery tell us more?
Uh-huh.
Is that so? Interesting.
Do tell.
Yes, I know you're crazy at Lucinda.
Mixers or it didn't happen.
Doctor, one more question.
We know that Facebook and Twitter are some of the most reliable sources of medical information.
Why is Mark Zuckerberg not the current surgeon general?
Well, Doctor, I can tell you right now, you've been right on the money 100% of the time.
You heard it here first, straight from the horse's mouth.
Turkey measles.
Soon to be a thing of the past.
We'll be back after this commercial break.
[♪ INTRO MUSIC PLAYING [♪
Hey, TCB! What's up? It's Jeff DeWaskin from Live from Detroit.
The Jeff DeWaskin Show, your second favorite podcast.
Happy 100 episodes.
Oh my God, I'm so excited for you.
I'm so excited.
You know what else is 100 years this year?
Betty Crocker.
Hey, Creasy and Brian, congratulations on your 100 episodes.
Best of you guys.
And cheesets are 100 years old.
Happy 100 episodes to the TCB team, you guys. And cheesets are a hundred years old. Happy 100 episodes to the TCB team.
You guys rock.
Best to you.
The first polygraph was created in 1921.
I'm not lying.
Happy 100 episodes.
100 episodes.
Happy 100 to you.
And you. Hi Brian and Chrissy. It's not fun. Happy 100 to you, you!
Hi Brian and Chrissy, it's my fan!
I'm one of your big and stands, Happy 100 Episodes, and a big congratulations to you both.
Thank you for all the laughs along the way, for your horrible relationship of ice, and
for all the other youthless information you've shared that now feels my head.
Best to you, bye!
I'm in Jackson's side, best to you guys.
Happy 100, happy 100, happy 100, happy 100,
bye!
Hey, you guys are doing a great job man, happy 100!
Congratulations on one of your decisions.
Congratulations on 100!
The commercial break is the greatest thing since sliced bread.
Congratulations, you guys.
That's you.
On this episode of the commercial break,
I'm gonna be having like the Chinese green
body for my key up and Jeff's in the background like,
hey bro! Hey man, do this show over here. Good dude. Green body for my key and Jeff's in the background like hey
Hey man doing a show over here cool dude
Get you up to you later Okay, y'all's little project
Good Jeff and I gonna start a company at one time or something
Jim and I were gonna start 12 companies at one time
I think every time we get drunk we have a new company restart And then we set a meeting for it and it never happens.
It's like, okay, next Wednesday,
we're gonna get all the decision makers on the phone.
Oh.
Oh.
Since you always joke about making a few dollars,
how much does the show actually make?
Uh-huh.
Well, a lady never kisses and tells,
but I will say this, it's in the hundreds of dollars,
yearly.
This is a passion project.
This is a passion project.
Well, but what were we?
What were we for?
I like to think our new sponsor, Hello Fresh.
Okay. All right right last one last one here. We go
What does it mean to be a brony is it a man that loves brownies a man that is I
Will a man that is fan fan of my little pony a gay brother or someone who doesn't want to get a covid vaccine a gay brother
What's up, Brody?
The next episode of the commercial break starts now.
It's another episode of the commercial break! Woo!
Yeah, another episode of this commercial break.
Take two. Take two.
Thank you.
Welcome to the commercial break.
I'm Brian Green.
This is Kristen Oedley and Happy Holidays.
Best of you, Kristen.
Best of you, Brian.
Best of you out there in the podcast.
Universe thanks for joining us.
Happy 100th anniversary episode.
Oh my God, 100th anniversary.
Look at that.
Happy 100th.
Look at that.
They told us we wouldn't make it.
They told us we wouldn't reach super stardom.
They told us we wouldn't be the most popular show in
Podcasting history and they may have been right. Yeah, but we did do one thing that you didn't think we're gonna do
We weren't gonna make it to episode number 100. We're here. We're deal. Fuck you. Yeah, we made it to 100
Yes, which makes us better or makes us more prolific than 90% of the
podcasts that ever get started out there. So from that standpoint we're still
rather unsuccessful but at least we made it to 100. It's easy to start one.
I'm ready to continue it. Hi Brian, it's your move.
Oh wait, take a moment on the phone. Hi, Ms. Ben. Hi, Obley. Hi, Obley. Hi, Obley.
Hi, Obley.
Hi, Obley.
Hi, Obley.
Hi, Obley.
Hi, Obley.
Hi, Obley.
Hi, Obley.
Hi, Obley.
Hi, Obley.
Hi, Obley.
Hi, Obley.
Hi, Obley.
Hi, Obley.
Hi, Obley.
Hi, Obley.
Hi, Obley.
Hi, Obley.
Hi, Obley.
Hi, Obley.
Hi, Obley. Hi, Obley. Hi, Obley. Hi, Obley. Hi, Obley. Hi, Obley. Hi, Obley. Hi, Obley. Hi, Obley. Hi, Obley. Hi, Obley. Hi, Obley. Hi, Obley. Hi, Obley. Hi, Obley. Hi, Obley. Hi, Obley. Hi, Obley. Hi, Obley. Hi, Obley. Hi, Obley. Hi, Obley. Hi, Obley. Hi, Obley. Hi, Obley. Hi, Obley. Hi, Obley. Hi, O We can have done it without your support. Thank you. You guys are doing great.
I, like, I, when I told Brian I said,
when you start that television show,
I know you're going to be so successful.
Mm-hmm.
The vlog.
The vlog.
Ah.
Ah.
Ah.
Ah.
Chrissy.
It's me.
I'm his mom.
So I'm here.
I'll be right there.
I'm awake.
I'm asleep.
Thanks so much.
I'm looking for your show. I'm the television here guys, but I just can't find it. Oh, what do you channel?
Do you think?
Currently stuck on a channel that are only speaking Spanish. Oh, well, change it. But the guys are good looking.
I'm ready. I'm rested and ready. Go, mom. Go.
I'm ready. I'm rested and ready. Go mom go. We have an outbreak of syphilis at the retirement.
Oh.
It's a really bad situation.
Luckily, it's early doesn't happen. I had him tested.
Oh, that's good.
He doesn't really use his lower half of his body anymore.
If you know what I mean.
You guys are who's that guy that's helping you guys out, Frankie B.
Oh, Frankie B.
The Brian said,
Frankie B is helping him with it.
With it pumping him up.
Step, step, step.
Get him stiff.
I think that's what he said.
Okay, guys, congratulations on 100.
Gotta let you go now.
Bye.
Bye.
It's always nice, so mom stops by.
Mommy is in the hospital with coronavirus.
That is true, start.
She'll make it, though.
She's fine.
As she says, she's getting the colloquial antoboldals.
That's what she called it.
You know what they call it?
The coquals?
I said, oh yeah, they're giving you the coquals.
Yeah, they're giving me the coquals.
Everything's gonna be fine.
The coconut, the coconut thing, you know.
I'm like, I don't know what you're talking about.
Monocolonical, anacobautobies.
Was that, was that what they call it?
Regeneron?
I think it's a new official term for it.
Okay, so we're 100 episodes in, congratulations.
Would you have ever thunk that this would have happened?
Did you imagine we'd be 100 episodes in?
I mean, last week I did.
Go, this morning I woke up and I'm like,
we got a 50-50 shot of getting this done today.
I feel good. And you know what? I was right, we have a 50-50 shot of getting this done today. I feel good.
And you know what?
I was right.
We have a 50-50 shot of getting it done.
I take myself way back to episode number one or two
when we had just gotten started
and we were on shitty microphones
and looking in these bad cameras at each other
just trying to figure out exactly what
the commercial business was.
I'm proud to stow it in my bedroom.
It's trying to study myself.
I'm like the Chinese green body for my key.
And Jeff's in the background like,
Hey, bro!
Hey, man, do it a show over here.
Cool, dude.
Getcha up with you later.
Y'all's a little project.
Yeah.
Good.
Jeff and I are going to start a company at one time or something.
Jim and I were going to start 12 companies at one time, I think.
Every time we get drunk, we have a new company we're starting.
And then we set a meeting for it and it never happens.
It's like, okay, next Wednesday we're gonna get all the decision-makers on the phone.
We're gonna get all the key players involved.
Yeah.
Sounds like a good idea.
We still waiting for that phone call to happen on the first idea.
Anyway, when I look back on episode number one or two,
I remember thinking to myself,
I think if this becomes like a 10 episode thing,
and we get to share it with our friends and family,
I think that would be really cool.
Or if we made it to episode number 20,
I'd feel really proud of ourselves,
because I knew statistically that most podcasts don't make it pass episode number seven,
let alone 20, and here we are a hundred episodes in and I got to think.
So exciting.
I got to thank you first of all for for being my partner on this crazy crazy ride that's
been the commercial break.
I know.
It has been so it's actually served the purpose of breaking throughout the life.
You know, throughout the pandemic.
Yeah, I mean, you can get so in your head,
just now even, you know, with other stuff that's going on,
it's nice for us to come into our little bubble.
It is, the cycle, a little happy bubble,
where we get to be creative and we get to create.
And the crazy thing is, is that there are people,
the crazy thing to me, is there are people out there
that have been responding to whatever it is we're creating
in here.
And podcasting can be a lonely thing.
And I'm glad I have holdy with me, but even then it can still be a lonely thing, and I'm glad I have HODY with me, but even then it can
still be a lonely thing because you talk into this microphone and you don't get any
kind of instant feedback.
I mean, I've said this a million times to how many people have asked me, if it wasn't
for HODY, I wouldn't be doing this show anymore because it's HODY that gives me the feedback
that I need to keep the show kind of driving, right?
If I didn't have that in the room,
or if I had it in a different way,
a way that wasn't so comfortable,
I don't think that I would still be here doing this for sure.
I don't even think I would have done
episode number one to be honest with you.
If I'm being real honest with you.
I love it, I love you.
I love you too.
This has been great,
and we've been able to really keep in touch
with our friendship.
Yeah, that's true.
It's like another layer, another chapter of the friendship has been the and we've been able to really keep in touch with our friendship. Yeah, that's true. It's like another level, another layer, another chapter of the friendship
has been the commercial break chapter. And I gotta say it's probably one of the more exciting
chapters. Right. I mean, you know, they're getting drunk at the
braze game with the little chapter, too. Or the, or the my girlfriend just committed
to us. Oh, no, she didn't. That was a cool chapter also.
But what I do have to say, I just wanna thank a couple people and then we'll get to it
because I know you don't wanna hear a big long speech.
So I won't give a big one speech.
As you clear throat.
Yeah, as I, I just like to get on my note here for a second.
I like to thank the academy.
I'd like to give it up to the big man in the sky.
The one who makes it all possible. The one who makes it all possible.
The one who makes it all possible.
The one who makes it all possible.
My landlord.
My son, that gives us the time.
I wanna thank you.
I wanna thank the audience, every single person,
every single individual person out there
who has downloaded over the months, over the years, whatever it is, however long you've been listening, I want to really
appreciate the fact that you've listened. I appreciate even more of the people who talk to us and
reach out, they comment and they text message and they email and they support the show and whichever
way they've supported the show. You know who you are. I don't need to go through the list, but there
are some people that I would like to name names. You name names. I'm going to give you the list you are. I don't need to go through the list, but there are some people that I would like to name names.
You name names. I'm gonna give you the list of names.
I'd like to thank first and foremost, I want to thank my wife, who without her, this show would never have happened.
Period and descendants. She's the one who drove me to get on a microphone and do something creatively.
Do something.
To do something, anything.
Stop talking to me, get on a microphone.
I think she just wanted me out of her hair.
Yeah.
And she's like, is there anything else you can do
besides stare at me all day long?
I think she wanted some, she wanted some place
for the bad jokes to go.
She was like, okay, real funny.
Do that on a microphone and then put it out to people
and see if they like it.
I care.
I'm giving shit.
I want to thank my wife, her love and support
for both of us and for the show.
She's our biggest cheerleader always has been
and we love her for it.
So thank you very much, Astrid.
Jeff, who I know who is probably wanted to ring my neck at times over this fucking commercial
break.
Like really dude, really?
I can't do that with you.
I've got to go record the commercial break.
Did he just call you doing that?
Did he just call you doing that?
That's a show still on?
That show still on?
Wow. You guys. That show.
Wow. You guys are keep going. Huh?
In spite of all credible evidence to the contrary, you guys keep going.
And you probably like, did you, did Brian just call you in 1139 say he had to re record the episode again?
Is that like six weeks in a row?
Jeff has been ultra supportive in ways we can't
give you. I know happy anniversary to you.
And then I want to thank the the bit players who are not who are anything but bit players.
And that's Gustavo who has always been helping out functionally producing the show.
Cutting the clips, helping us out, giving us content ideas.
Tina Kano, who has been a good friend of the show cutting the clips helping us out giving us content ideas Tina Kano
Yeah, who has been a good friend of the show and has done the same
Our brothers our family everybody who is out there Rachel Rachel McGraft for sure Alice in hair
Has been a huge supporter of the fan of the show
So I want to thank them and there's so many more that I you know
You won't know and you probably don't care
But I just want you to know that it takes a village to make this idiot sound.
Like, I was gonna say good, but I'm not even sure that's true.
You know who you are.
We love you very much.
Thank you for all of your support and love throughout the year.
Okay, now that I'm done with the speech,
let's get to the show, okay?
www.tcbpodcast.com is where you can go
to find out more about Chrissy and I.
Read all the show notes.
Listen to all the audio, watch all the video,
and if you're so inclined, please follow us
on Instagram at the commercial break.
You can find content that you can't find anywhere else
on that Instagram.
I'm doing reels, we're having fun.
Yeah.
You know, and we only have real followers.
I just want you to know that.
We have never once bought a follower on Instagram,
which is the reason why we still stuck at seven to 800 followers.
I see other podcasts that have like 26,000 followers,
and then I realize they get two likes on each post.
And I'm like, holy fucking shit, man, that's pretty obvious.
But I guess, I don't know, maybe they just...
To each third of them. To each third of them. Maybe they like those big numbers. We like real shit man, that's pretty obvious. But I guess, I don't know, maybe they just, to each throw up, to each throw up.
Maybe they like those big numbers.
We like real.
Yeah, we like real numbers.
We like real low numbers.
Yeah.
We like real numbers, real low numbers.
So go to the website, go to Instagram,
youtube.com slash the commercial break.
If you would subscribe, you can watch all of the episodes
there and we do a lot of clips there too.
So please do that.
It helps the show in ways that I can't even explain.
I don't want to explain.
It doesn't really fucking matter.
You get it.
That's why everyone says, like and subscribe.
Like it.
Smash that subscribe button right over here.
That's not hold these tits.
That's there.
There you go.
I was pointing to.
Yeah.
I know.
We have a, you see in our YouTube channel,
we have a subscribe thing on the thing.
And hold these tits happen to be right there.
I sound like pointing to a tits.
Point on a tits.
Smash that subscribe tits.
That's it.
That's it.
Thank you, B. What a proof.
And I want to tell you that we're going to be
at Mempho Fest 2021, widespread panic.
The A.V.E. Brothers, Lucinda Williams.
Who else?
Wax the Hatch.
Wax the Hatch. You black, you black, you blue. You black, you blue. You black, you blue. You black, you blue. one widespread panic the A-Vet brothers lose into Williams who else wax the hats wax the hatching
Billy strings black puma yeah nothing no right love yeah that goes on on on and we're so excited
and we're partnering with cast box to be there live and doing recordings there we're going to be
recording episodes right there and we may even go live on fire sites of download fire side you know
the drill with fire side chat and so we want to thankpho very much who has so far treated us very well.
And you know, we're gonna go have a good time
and I'm sure we're all gonna get locked
back in the house again, right?
And that's it.
That's it.
Mempho, bail mom included.
You're too old to be camping.
That should be, Memphos. That should definitely be. Well, there's no camping at Mempho. You're too old to be camping. That should be Memphis.
That should definitely do.
Well, there's no camping at Mempho.
But I know, that's exactly right.
They said you're too old to be camping.
Mempho, you're too old for that shit.
And Mempho, doesn't your job drug test?
Mempho, why do your kids smell like the chewy?
Okay, so here's what I decided to do a couple of weeks ago. Now, I want you to understand one thing I'm going to say it once,
and then I don't want to bring down the whole show.
But Chrissy and I had huge intentions for episode number 100,
including bringing back some of your favorite characters
and some of your favorite guests.
But because of some family stuff that's been going on
between the both of us,
like my mom being in the hospital with coronavirus,
our production schedule shrunk this week,
and so we will continue to do things throughout episode
throughout the hundreds that we'll make up for.
But one of the things that we really wanted to do
and that I got a chance to put together was,
we had people write in some questions for us.
Oh, okay.
So there's two things that we're going to do.
The first one is we have some folks who,
I call them super fans, who wrote in some questions for us
and they like answers.
So I'm gonna get them fucking answers.
They're looking for answers.
They're looking at everyone's looking for answers
from the commercial break.
If there's one place you wanna get concise,
accurate information, it's the commercial break.
By the way, they're back.
The reviews are back. People are back reviewing our show. It's the commercial break. By the way, they're back. The reviews are back.
People are back reviewing our show.
It's not our show you're reviewing.
I saw.
Did you see that?
One person put five stars.
Thanks.
Yeah, I know.
Thanks.
What?
Are these people?
I love us, the thanks.
Some things suspicious is going on.
And then they're again with, you know,
the best political and best political
advice on the net. I'm like, what? I'm the net. You're looking for a rush along. He's
dead. I know. It's really weird. It's really weird. But, you know, at least I don't even
good reviews. I guess it could be worse. It could be bad reviews. You know what, do us a
favor. If you would, please subscribe to the podcast and on Apple.
Even if you don't use Apple to listen to it every time,
subscribe on Apple and leave us a review.
And let's drown out some of these other commercial break
reviews that we're getting.
Because it looks ridiculous.
You go to the commercial break
and you think it's a fucking political news show.
It's anything but, I mean, I realized
that this is where you get your information.
But it should't show.
About the, you know, the wolves wild
that have morphed into vampires.
Yeah.
Is that a show?
We reviewed.
No, we didn't do vampire.
We did some vampires.
We'll get there.
We'll vampire.
Yeah, we'll get there.
Hunting wolf vampires.
We're gonna do ASMR pretty quick.
And wait until we get to ASMR.
Oh my God, that's creepy.
That shit is creepy though.
I'm an ASMR shit.
Okay, here's some questions that have been sent in
by some TCB super fans.
Let's just say that.
I wanna, I'll thank the people who sent
into questions you know who you are.
Okay, are you ready?
Yes.
Okay.
Why, I think this is for me.
Why do you insist on calling Jeff Bezos?
Jeff Bezos.
Oh, wait, is it the other way around?
Do I say Jeff Bezos and it's actually Jeff Bezos?
I think it's Bezos.
I think it's Bezos.
Why do one insist on it?
That's a stupid fucking question.
I don't know.
What on it's just not doing it? Have you a stupid fucking question. I don't know. What I insist on doing it.
Have you heard me? Have you ever taken the time to listen to the commercial break? I'm all over the place.
Yes. All of half of my information isn't correct. I'm constantly missing and misspelling word. Don't even...
This is a stupid question. I'm an idiot. That's why.
Oh, here's one.
Okay, I think this is controversial.
Oh.
Why have you and Chrissy never hooked up?
I'll let you go first on that.
Yeah, you know, I mean, I think they're probably, well, you were married when we first met.
I was married.
And I never have dated married men.
That's right. And then we just kind of became too good of friends
Then because then once you got divorced then you were dating a lot of other girls
That's who he likes. Okay. Well, no, that's not gonna happen and and after a while
It just seemed like it would make things weird. We worked together. Yeah, I think I think that was probably the the prevailing
Sentiment at least in my mind is that the people that I worked with I did not want to revolve with in any way things weird, we worked together. Yeah, I think that was probably the prevailing sentiment.
At least in my mind is that the people that I worked with,
I did not want to revolve with in any way, shape of a word.
Because it was my first real office job at a company,
at a big company, I had only worked for startups before
and only worked for startups after if that does you anything.
But I believe that I didn't want to.
And then I was in relationship.
Yeah, you were in relationship.
And you were in relationship. I just never happened. And so thank God And then I was in relationship Yeah, you were in relationship I was in relationship
I just never happened
And so thank God
And I think God, honestly
Yeah, yeah
You know, we have other friends that are female
that I have not hooked up with
And then there are a lot of friends that I have hooked up with
I mean, as is the
And there were not friends anymore
There you go
Why?
Why did we never hook up?
I don't know the exact reason
Every single time
and I'm sure there were moments in the past where it was like,
huh, right?
But it just never was the thing.
No, we just always had like a love for each other.
Correct.
A love that did not include my penis.
Yes.
That's just it.
So there you go.
There's your answer.
Good question.
We get to that one all the time by the way.
We've actually had other podcasts talk about,
like we've had other podcasts on their podcast, talking about the commercial break and saying,
oh, they've hooked up, no, they're fucking, no,
down, you're wrong, we didn't, we haven't.
Since you always joke about making a few dollars,
how much does the show actually make?
Well, a lady never kisses and tells,
but I will say this, it's in the hundreds of dollars,
yearly.
This is a passion project.
This is a passion project.
But while we're at, while we're at,
while we're at, I like to think our new sponsor,
Hello Fresh. Well, but well, well, I like to think our new sponsor hello fresh
I'd like to thank our new sponsor for a bunch of cooler 3000 with right vibrating rabbit and extender
Yeah, how much have we made versus how much if we spent it's it's my Be part of the reason why yeah, this might be part of the reason why Chrissy never hooked up with me
She's like I can't make a dollar just say it was life
might be part of the reason why Chrissy never hooked up with me. Because she's like, I can't make a dollar to say it was live.
Spoken chill.
She's like, I'd like to date someone that actually makes money that can afford to take me out
places.
Yeah, it's not that much.
It's not that much, but it could be more if you would.
It could be more.
Yeah.
If you're fucking bought some. If it's your problem.
We just started taking on sponsorships
at the beginning of the year.
You have to have so many downloads
to be attractive to ad networks,
who are essentially outsourced sales teams.
We belong to advertised cast.
We love them very much.
There are great ad network that supports independent creators
like us, mostly independent creators like us. And we are exclusive with them them and the truth is it takes some time for that stuff to build up and part of the challenge
Of having a podcast like ours and you want to make money is there's only a few avenues that you can go
We don't sell books. We're not doing get rich quick schemes
Or not, you know, when I saw you of course, we're not telling you to come to the fucking Hilton for an hour long real estate seminar.
That we should do that. Maybe we could do that. I could do that. Hey, you do. You do can lose $1,000
every minute. Join Brian Green's How to Lose Money in Real Estate Seminar. And we'd like to be making
more. We would. But it takes time. These things take time to build up. And so that's when you hear those commercials.
We're enhancing, we're reaching toward it.
Yeah. When you hear those commercials,
it's important that you use the URLs
and the special codes to buy stuff
because that tells the sponsors
that we're actually doing the job.
I'm not saying that's not happening.
I'm saying that can support the show in waste.
But we're relatively new on the ad scene
and we understand that it takes time.
So we're not complaining. It's just the way that it is and in the future
One of the things that Chrissy and I have told each other we'd like to do and we believe there are a few cities
That will support this kind of
Yeah, Madison Square Garden. Yeah, Madison Square Garden
The the chat newga children science museum
the the chat new good children science museum.
Waffle House on full industry of all of our else for sure.
Welcome to the show. We love to we love to our shoes there.
Yes.
I'm in a wall.
We have your shoes.
Waffle House.
Your girlfriend broke up with you.
We're waiting for you.
Yeah, we're waiting for you.
Taken half in the car.
We'll see you back in here.
Waffle house.
You told your girlfriend to fuck off.
That's why she's still here with us.
We'll keep her warm for you.
What episode was that waffle house?
I don't know, but that was a good one.
Yeah, like funny. I think it's waffle house. I don't know, but that was a good one. Yeah, like funny
I think it's waffle house we have your shoes. I think is that's what it is. It must be it must be credit card
Yeah, I think it's we have your shoes
Mempho bail not included
Mempho you're too old for that shit
Mempho everybody buys VIP.
That's why you can't see the stage.
Yeah, we're getting there.
Support our sponsors.
You know, it goes.
If you had to eat one type of food for the rest of your life, what type of food would
you eat?
Well, this is a trick question,
because would you be able to maintain your weight
or would you just completely get a heart attack?
Cause mine wouldn't be bacon.
I actually threw that,
I'm actually threw the carrot out the road.
Bacon, but that's not a type of food.
I think he means like, he or she means like Mexican,
Chinese, what kind of food would you eat? Asian, I think. Asian? I love Asian food. I would eat the cheeseburger type of food. I think he means like he or she means like Mexican, Chinese, what kind of food would you? Asian, I think. Asian? I love
the cheeseburger type of food. Whatever that is. American. I think it would be Mexican or it would
be American food. Yeah. One of the two because I do I do greatly like it.
Uh, cheeseburger and I'm a huge fan of Mexican food. So one of those two. I love all Asian food.
What would you consider? Uh, when do you consider TCB a success?
What, by what measure would you consider the show a success?
I mean, we made it to 100, that's boom.
I think it's kind of like a bunch of small victories.
Yeah, we're climbing out.
I mean, who's, you know, who's listening to us?
I don't know, but we're making, keep on making your context.
Yes.
I think, you know, I have this vision in my head
that we do some live shows. Yeah. And I think that would be to me. I think, you know, I have this vision in my head that we do some live shows.
Yeah.
And I think that would be to me.
That would, if people actually came out to see them,
I can see us renting out a theater.
And like six people show up and it's the ushers.
Hey everybody!
Welcome!
Woo!
Hey everybody! Welcome! Woo!
And now straight from Atlanta Georgia!
That's to you! It's Chrissy and Brian from the Commission Big!
Woo!
Yes!
Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you very much
You can actually turn around and look at it. Oh, you're the usher. I'm sorry. I'm sorry
Best to you
I don't think they're playing tonight.
This meant
fucking ticket master application.
I thought you said widespread was going to be here.
Yeah, I think if we did some live shows, I think that'd be cool.
That would be.
I certainly think if we had a big production house, house that
assisted to this show on their behalf, right?
Maybe it's when we get our own studio,
like our out of studio.
Yeah, when we get out of my house.
Yeah, out of home studio.
So if we get out of my child's bedroom,
I think my daughter's also gonna consider
the show that's successful at that point too.
Maybe they'll finally be proud of me.
Someone's being a smart ass,
do you watch 90 day fiancee?
It should be a part of the show. Go fuck being a smart ass. Do you watch 90 day fiancee? Should be a part of the show.
Go fuck yourself.
Smart ass.
Okay, and when did you start calling Chrissy Houdley and why?
Oh, that's easy.
But from the gig.
From the gig go.
From the gig getting Chrissy.
We had our names on the outside of our cubes.
You had an actual office with a door because you were a big shop.
That was big rig.
That's right.
Yeah, you're a big shop.
That's right.
They said, if you lose payment, we're going to give you enough.
I had a cube.
I had a cube.
The sales team had a cube.
Had all had cubes.
And we had our names out there.
And it's a Chrissy Houdley.
And you just started calling me
I don't know why my what x-wife and I at the time were bringing stuff into my office like making it more homie like a fern
You know the shit
Between the two for her for her and I think I ever watered it
I actually think it's still in my house somewhere. I'm not sure. It's in a closet or any attic
but you know we were bringing stuff in on the Saturday afternoon.
And every time I had to walk by Chrissy Hodeley's little queue.
That was on the main road.
Yeah, you were on the main road.
She was like center street.
We're all the managers could scream and yell directly at her.
How did we?
1130 is not a time to come in the office.
I was at a meeting.
Which meeting?
Budweiser?
I was out seeing clients.
I was out seeing clients.
Which clients?
Let's see.
I went to the dry cleaner, to the bar, to I domino's pizza.
Brian was there. You know? We did we have, we went subbud like twice.
Jesus Christ. Danu Julio. I'm gonna go through what, Bobby. There's anybody have a toothbrush
I can use.
I have a meeting with the president.
What have you guys did?
I think I did.
I think I did.
You had toothbrush one time.
I went with my one of those little disposable ones.
You did.
Yeah, you were, you had them in your...
I had the pre-done toothpaste in it.
That's right.
I was like, you're frying.
You need this.
You need this.
Oh.
Yeah, that's how I started calling her HODI.
I walked by a million times.
I actually started a song.
HODELY DODLE. Thank you, please. Yeah, I said HODI DOD HODI. I walked by a million times. I actually started a song, HODELY DODELY.
I totally do.
Yeah, I said HODELY DODELY,
and then I referred to it,
and then everybody in the entire office started calling for me.
I had a brand new manager,
and she just automatically was like,
HODELY?
Yep, everyone called me.
I've never been called by my last name in my entire life
until I'm at Pride.
I started a trend,
and here it is still living today on the commercial.
So hundreds of thousands of people now think of you.
Yes.
Probably, as holey.
Okay, as holey, dolly.
Okay, here's the last one and then I want to get to a game that we're going to play.
The question is directed at me.
What made you go from a crazy mushroom taking father?
Who I didn't take that many mushrooms was mainly acid.
I got mushroom taking. She was mainly acid. I got a mushroom taking it off.
It was mainly acid cocaine.
And ayahuasca.
To a straight-laced father.
Well, you said it in the sentence, a father.
That's what made me...
Yeah, listen, I have nothing against any...
And I'm not sober, 100%, I don't go to AA meetings,
not that I probably shouldn't.
That is funny, but I have children.
I have children and it's too hard.
It's too hard.
It's too difficult.
Yeah, they don't know what's going on and they're still waking up at 6am.
That's right.
I have a friend who reads.
If you're just going to bed at 6am, it's kind of hard to panic.
Yeah, I mean, and like 6am, sometimes I wouldn't go to bed until like 6am, the following day.
Right. So I'd be like, you know,
our number 72, yeah, I'd play right through it.
That's right.
You cannot be a great parent when you're 12 Budwizers in.
I just don't think so, right?
And I know some parents who raised children
earlier on in their life, like they were in their early 20s
when they started to have children.
And they managed to accomplish it
with the help of an incredibly
understanding and supportive family and spouse.
That's the only way they got through it
because they were fuck up of the epic,
but the other person on the other end was incredibly supportive.
Not that Astrid wouldn't be,
I just think she may have married me.
She part of the reason why she may have married me
is go, oh, this guy can be a responsible father.
Okay, we'll get some more questions.
Let's have things right again.
You may get a big leap with that.
Oh yeah, she's still in between the ledges.
She's like, I don't know if I'm gonna make it all the way over.
Okay, thank you guys for writing in right more questions
at 661 Best to you.
Send that over to us. And in a future episode, we will answer more questions, 661 best to you send that over to us and in a future episode
We will answer more questions, but I wanted to make sure I got to a game. Okay, here's the production staff
Put together a game for us. They put together what they're calling do you know your TCB? Okay, okay?
Hundred episodes in do we know TCB? Okay, do we know our TCB?
There's 25 questions
In this little thing, after a hundred episodes
I don't remember what we talked about last episode to be honest with you. I really don't we air that episode
Probably not
Okay, yeah
How well do you know your commercial break?
T-C-
How well do you know it?
T-C-
We'll find out!
T-C- T-C- T-C- T-C- T-C- T-C- T-C- T-C- T-C- T-C- T-C- T-C- T-C- T-C- T-C- T-C- T-C- T-C- T-C- T-C- T-C- T-C- T-C- T-C- T-C- T-C- T-C- T-C- T-C- T-C- T-C- T-C- T-C- T-C- T-C- T-C- T-C- T-C- T-C- T-C- T-C- T-C- T-C- T-C- T-C- T-C- T-C- T-C- T-C- T-C- T-C- T-C- T-C- T-C- T-C- T-C- T-C- T-C- T-C- T-C- T-C- T-C- T-C- T-C- T-C- T-C- T-C- about these 100 episodes or about each other. I think it's how it goes. I actually don't know. I have an chance to read these questions.
I didn't cheat.
Not one bit.
They put them in the bowl.
Our production staff got it together.
Gustavo, Alley, Astrid with some help
from some additional people.
So here you go.
I'll take the first one.
The question is multiple choice.
And the answer is on the back.
Okay.
So I guess what we'll do is we'll ask the question
and maybe we can both together figure if we can figure out the answer. Okay. Some of these are harder than
others. I do know that. They went from easy medium and that hard. Okay. Until when is it
appropriate to say happy new year? Is it C the end of January or is it D Valentine's Day?
How long should you be saying Happy New Year?
Well, wait, none of those include what we actually did.
We're just saying how long is it appropriate?
Oh, okay.
Well, from back what I have said before,
and I said, I thought it was all through January.
All through January is Chris's answer
I'm gonna say until valentine's day is what we actually said okay, okay
Give me your example, okay, and the answer is a holy is correct about that one very good
Oh, they
Okay, all right, so that's gets giving example of the questions now. Let's get right into it. That was the example question.
Oh, okay.
Huh.
Uh, what was the name of the first TCB short clip on YouTube?
Oh god.
I have no fucking clue.
Oh, actually, I think I do know this because I spent so much time on it.
It was so bad.
It still gets a lot of views.
And I'm like, I heard people watching.
I don't know. I don't Was it a Sunday morning swingers club?
B Brian tells, hold me yet another story
See gas station shenanigans or D late people
I think all of these are a clip name actually yeah, they are are. But the very first one, let me give you the story.
I realize, I'm going with gas station, by the way.
I'm going to say that Brian tells,
Holi, another story.
That's my guess, okay?
Here's a story about this clip.
There's a story about the story.
Here's a story about the story.
It's kind of funny, actually.
I just, and here's the story about the story clip. I,
we put out a couple of YouTube videos and we were excited about this where I was like,
wow, we could be on YouTube, you know, that's the thing we should have been doing since
the beginning, but took us a while to get up the courage and figure it all out.
And the lighting, the lighting, whatever. Yeah, actual YouTube account. And I remember
I was on vacation at the time,
and I was trying to cut up a clip,
and I kept getting rejected by YouTube.
They wouldn't put the clip out there
for some reason or another.
I don't understand why.
So I was constantly in communication with YouTube
about this clip, and what was funny is
that the lady kept on responding
that she can't say dick in the first 30 seconds.
And what I was doing is I was saying that this video is made for children.
And she's like, you can't say dick in the first 30 seconds.
And I'm like, why?
And finally, she was like, because it's for children.
And I'm like, what about that cliff? Do you think it's for children?
I was saying you had it marked.
I had it marked for children. Yeah.
This content is appropriate for children.
I learned my lesson quickly.
You can't say Dick in the first 30 seconds,
but feel free to, you know, cock and balls it all over the place
for the kids after the first time.
That's right.
My mad vagina sitting on someone.
God.
OK.
Sunday morning swingers club.
Brian tells Holdy another story. Overn overnight gas station shenanigans or late people
Hopefully says it's over my gaskers. I'm saying that it's late at a story Brian tells hold the yet another story. Okay
The answer is big
Which one was that that's another story? Okay
Try and keep up. I think.
Oh, I like this game. It's fun. Okay.
What does Brian like to do that his wife doesn't give a fuck about?
Everything.
Breathing.
Existing. breathing. What existing?
What are the choices? A golf, A, B, watch my big fat American gypsy wedding. See the commercial break or D, all of the above. Oh, I don't know.
I think she gives a fuck about the
fuck about the commercial.
Yes, that one's out or she's acting.
Probably a process of elimination here.
I might have to say the gypsy wedding.
You think it's gypsy wedding?
I know she doesn't like that show.
So I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say gypsy wedding too.
That's B, right?
That's B.
The answer is D.
Did it all talk about any of it. Wow.
Well. Well, you've been putting the shine on. That's good for a long time. Taking that executive
producer credit away from you. And I'm giving it to Nico, who's not even breathing. By the way,
Nico continues to rot and directly in front of our eyeballs.
I was talking to somebody that said is Niko really real?
Oh yes, he is.
Niko is real.
Every time I go to peda, I see her like, oh my God.
Niko continues to rot.
The other day, I was down on the floor playing with my daughter in the kitchen.
And Niko was like stumbling down the hallway.
I don't know why.
I was like, stumbling down the hallway.
And as he was stumbling, just shit was dropping out the back of his ass.
And I'm like, Niko, Niko, Niko.
And he runs into my daughter's room.
He gets scared and he starts rubbing his ass along.
And I'm like, oh, ass along. Oh my God. Nico.
Nico.
Nico.
Nico, just go ahead and transition.
What are we doing?
Why are we waiting so long?
He speaks to the dad.
What hell are you putting me through?
By the way, Astrid, I'm on to you now.
Okay, here's another one, ready?
Yes. Which popular TV's another one, ready? Yes.
Which popular TV show has Oscar Aiden guest Oscar Aiden never watched?
Is it A Friends, B Project Runway, C Sex in the City, or D Golden Girl?
It's Sex in the City.
It's Sex in the City.
I remember this one.
I remember this one.
I remember this one.
I remember this one.
Yes.
It's Oscar Aiden. And if you haven't listened to the Oscar A Aiden episode goal Listen to the Oscar Aiden episode. Did we air that?
We did we did okay. Yeah, we actually like Oscar
The correct answer is see golden girls
Yeah, golden girls know it was it was sex in the city. I'm sorry second the city. He's never wise sex in the city
He loved golden girls. He never watched, yeah.
Oscar is a proud gay man and we thought it's strange.
We actually thought it's strange that a human being living in the United States of a certain
age had never watched at least one episode of Sex in the City.
Yeah, and he lives in New York.
Even I watched Sex in the City.
And he lives in New York.
I even I've watched Sex in the City.
I love that, yeah.
And, and no, I'm just gonna leave it at that
Nico
Who is the international man of mystery? Oh, oh, is it a William?
B Oscar Aden is it C
Henry Fonda or is it D Gustavo? Oh, I think it's Gustavo.
Gustavo.
Gustavo.
Gustavo.
Gustavo.
Gustavo.
Gustavo.
Gustavo.
Gustavo.
International man of mystery.
I want to let you know about Gustavo. Gustavo's staying at my house currently.
He's here at my house.
Last night, him and his girlfriend watched a marathon
of high school fucking musical.
One, two, and three.
I was having a hard time getting through
three minutes of that fucking movie.
I mean, and I like what's his name.
Zach Efron.
I like Zach Efron.
Yeah, no, he's supposed to be on our show.
But he's supposed to be on our show.
But he's supposed to be on our show,
but we just keep on ignoring his phone calls.
Ah, my voice mail's full, sorry buddy.
He, that is some of the worst movie making
I've ever seen in my entire life.
Have you seen it?
No.
Yeah, you're too old for that though, I think.
Mempho.
Mempho, you're too old for that shit.
Mempho, I'm too old for that shit.
Mimpho, I'm just here to see why it's better.
Mimpho. Mimpho, we marked Shake Down Street for you.
Mimpho.
Mimpho, your your cars here somewhere.
Yeah.
Men faux throw up it'll make you feel better.
Complete the phrase from episode 13.
Better to be better to be good then better to be great good to be better
To be mediocre or to be the last one wait
Okay, so complete the phrase from episode number 13 did Brian say
It's better to be good then better to be great. It's better to be good than good to be better
It's better to be great than to be mediocre or it's better to be great than to be the last one be good to be great. It's better to be good than good to be better. It's better to be great than to be mediocre or it's better to be great than to be the last.
I'm going to be good to be better. I think you're right about this. I think that it is.
Brian said it's better to be good than good to be better. I think that's the episode.
We're talked about flying on an airplane without a flight plan. That's great.
Wait, I need no thinking flight plan. Wait, what was the answer?
The answer was, beat.
It was, okay.
Okay.
Okay, Rachel McGrath confessed on the show
that she loves men with long hair
and that A smell good.
B look dirty but smell good.
C have a big checking account.
Or D have a large cock.
I know this for sure.
C likes men that look dirty but smell good and additionally have a large cock.
Yes.
That's a good addition.
That's a good addition.
Rage Demograph is a good friend of ours that showed up in a few of the first episodes.
And we're going to have her back soon.
Yes.
She showed up in a few of our first episodes and she is a constant, consummate, bachelor at.
She's always out there on the prowl,
finding men and hooking up on the dating apps.
She's that girl, she's that single friend of ours
that we go to for advice about single people
because now we're just old
and we don't know anything about that anymore.
Yeah, any of the apps.
And she likes big dick and dirty and smelling good.
Am I right about that?
The answer is B.
These are too easy guys.
We don't know where you see it.
We know you are new TCB.
Well, we created it.
So,
Mempo, we don't remember either.
Mempo, don't take the brown acid.
Mempo, there's a drug testing station down the street
Are they gonna have one of those drug testers at menfo?
Drug testers or the covid testers no the drug testers covid testers
I know they're gonna have covid testers are they're gonna have drug testers. No, no, why don't they do that?
You don't know about that. No like it bono ruined stuff, they have the drug testers, the non prop, not for profit.
Oh, okay.
People who come, yeah, and they bring their all their kits and they'll test your drugs for
you.
So if you buy cocaine, they'll test your cocaine and they'll tell you how this year's
already good.
Oh, man, for prides, the drug tester.
Come on by the GCB tent in front of the Lexus stage. and Brides the drug tester
Come on by the DCB tent in front of the Lexus stage and I'll test your drugs for you. No problem
Not sure what that is, but it is good. Good.
Oh, you're over there.
Right.
Right.
I'm picturing people going out to you.
Can you test my drugs and you just pop them?
And I get it.
Can you test my drugs?
I don't feel anything.
Already did.
Give me 15 minutes.
I'll call you in a minute.
Can I have my drugs back? No, you can't.
I hate them.
You should have had more than one.
That's the deal.
Make sure this is not the last of your drugs.
Send it right on the tent.
Woo!
I can just see me by the end of the night like,
Woo!
What do you want me to test? I can just see me by the end of the night like figure out where my car is. Which episodes? In which episodes
was there no cussing whatsoever? Wow, this is a deep research question. That is deep research.
Was it one in 22?
That's letter A, was it one in 22?
Was it B, number 10?
Number 10.
Was it C?
Number four, 22 and 75.
I know that's not true.
No.
Or was it D?
It doesn't exist. It doesn't exist. I'm gonna say it doesn't exist know that's not true. No. Or was it D? It doesn't exist.
It doesn't exist.
I'm gonna say it doesn't exist.
There's no way.
Yeah.
I think we've been kissing since the get-
The answer is D.
Yeah, there's no way.
There's no way we went one whole fucking episode
or that's nothing.
So, then was trying to be sneaky.
Yeah, there's one.
There's one.
There's an anomaly.
That episode didn't air either?
What is the first name of the first episode of season number two, which is episode number
42?
Is it my changing body?
Are changing bodies?
I'd like to talk to you, bud.
Changing bodies.
Is it C, our changing bodies, or no, our changing buddies?
Or is it D, your changing bodies?
I think I'm gonna go with our changing bodies.
I think it's your changing bodies.
I think it's your changing bodies.
I named the episodes I just know how I speak and I think it's your changing bodies.
Your changing bodies. No, you were correct think it's your changing bodies. Your changing bodies.
No, you were correct. It's our changing bodies.
Look at that.
Go home.
All right.
I think this is one we did not answer both of us correctly.
I want to tell you about changing bodies.
There is an outtake that's out there
where Chrissy and I were doing a, what were we doing?
For what for that show?
Yeah, we were doing something for a show.
Like we were doing a cross promotion for a show.
Chrissy and I did a cross promotion for a show
and it's an outtake on YouTube
and maybe I'll put it up on the website
or I'll send it on Instagram.
And Chrissy and I are at the end of a long day.
We've recorded like three episodes,
two of which we'll never hear and we know it.
So we've just wasted two and a half hours of our life.
Like we do sometimes.
And we know it.
Right, come on baby.
Give me one more.
Give me one more.
Come on baby.
Ride one more home.
We need just one hour of content I can air.
I'm so fucking picky.
At first they tried to argue with me. My wife and Chrissy, they'd be like,
no, it's crazy.
It's really good.
And then I'd be like, it's not,
we're not gonna err, I think they've learned just in slow, like, whatever.
Yeah.
Let him have his fun.
Yeah.
Chrissy and I, after a long day,
and I thought, remember, this was around Christmas time last year.
And we were asked to do a cross promotion.
So we need like a 30 second explanation
about the commercial break.
So I was like, hi.
Hi, Brian.
I'm Brian Green, son, father, alcoholic.
Hi, I'm Brian Green. I'm here to talk to you about your changing funny. I'm here to give you today's news. And tomorrow's weather, without bias.
Who is the first guest on the show in which episode was it?
Wait, did we ever answer the last question?
Oh, we did.
Yeah.
It wasn't one of our changing bodies.
It was, okay.
Who is the first guest on the show
in which episode was it?
Was it A, Rachel McGraft on episode number seven,
mushroom magnum pie?
I remember that one and I love that. That's a good one.
Yeah, that's a much more magnum pie.
Uh, was it Jeff Brandsford on episode number nine?
It's Sunday, spare me the big
p.s.
I think it was a seven.
I'm wrong.
Yeah, was it C Jeff Brandsford episode number eight to live room?
Or was it Rachel McGrath episode number 10 on gas station girl
Castation girl I think I might have been gas station girl
I think it's gas station girl. Yeah, cuz you were talking about how you heard her in the gas station
Yes, I heard her in the gas station in South Georgia
Welcome to WXTP 7 the voice of our Lord
What are you talking about
And how do people manage to get shit up on the ceiling?
Poops like that
Shit up on the ceiling who poops like that
Did they walk in and just bend directly over go well? I'm just gonna let it fly
It's all a favorite here
Just see some big old trucker walking in and just laying flat on the ground and being like
Well, there it is
There's no one in the cab with me. What do I care?
I kind of like my own stink, if you ask me.
I think it's gas station.
I think it's gas station girl episode number 10.
Yes.
No, it's not.
It's Jeff Brands for episode number eight,
two live room.
Two live room.
I remember the episode, but I thought
Ariesha was first.
I was out of two.
Two live room.
Two live room. That was a good one too. I did too. Too live, too live, too.
Too live, too.
That was a good one, too.
You want an interesting story?
Go back to that episode.
Talk about how Jeff went to jail for Too Live crew.
What was Chrissy referring to when she said,
maybe it's the pandemic's version of a swingers party?
Listening to a podcast while having sex,
Zoom calls with friends, sexting, or hotline
sessions. Oh, I'm going to get listening to a podcast while having sex. I'm going to
say Zoom call with friends. Okay. Oh, it's neither. Oh, yeah, no, it is listening to a podcast
while having sex. Yeah, you're right. I don't remember this because you...
I don't remember this.
I remember we're talking about this
because you said that you got some statistics back
and a lot of people listened to us
while they were sleeping or having sex.
We were like having sex.
We'll do this while they're having sex.
Those swingers.
This is I get those statistics by the way.
No, I have no idea those statistics, by the way.
I have no idea.
Oh, that's right.
I learned that a lot of people listen to podcasts
to fall asleep to.
Yeah, and we were, and I was sure that the commercial break
fell into the hats.
But also it was up there with having sex.
Waffle house.
Take a nap.
We don't care.
Waffle house. Please don't play another Kid Rock song.
Kid Rock is awesome.
In which event did Brian's roommate try and sell drugs?
Was it the World Cup, the Masters, the Super Bowl, or the Olympic Games in Atlanta in 1996?
I'm going Masters.
It was the masters
i mean i remember i lived it
i'm already talking about that
here's a story for those of you that don't know i'll tell you really quickly my
friend
and not my friend my roommate who was an absolute
bully to everybody around him he was a big irish guy
and he would make fun of you
he would
push you around he would beat you up he did
you suck you suck beat you up He didn't do this. Can you suck, can you suck, yeah?
I'm just kidding.
Yeah, I'm just kidding, bruh.
I love you, man.
Don't worry about it.
Hey, your girlfriend has no tits.
She's standing right here.
No, I'm just kidding.
She's got great tits.
They're small but they're great.
I mean, small like you can't see them,
but you know, they're great.
How does a guy like you get the pussy like that?
Are you guys going back to the room to fuck?
Because last time Brian lasted about seven minutes we'll we listen
Yeah, I'm just kidding. He's got a big dick. Not really. That's me. I got a big dick. You want to see it? Let me show it to you
By the way, I just got this dog. It's fucking piece of shit dog.
Go on, punky Brewster, whatever your name is.
Sit out on the porch for a couple days.
I don't teach it.
I don't teach it as shit now.
Anyway, he was an asshole.
His name was, I can't remember his name at this point,
Clinton, Chancellor, something, some dick name.
Chance.
Chance.
One of those names, Vance, Chance, something like that. He was a dick.
And he decided that he was going to go to the masters with, well, I forget what it was
27 hits of ecstasy on him in his sock. And not only was he going to go there, taking
ecstasy at the masters anyway. Fucking asshole. Clint.
Clint was his name.
I think it was Clint.
Clinton.
Clinton.
I can't remember anyway.
Yeah.
He went to the masters with 27 hits of ecstasy in his fucking sock.
He probably would have gotten away with it.
Had he not taken some ecstasy before he got to the front gate
and decided to get into a fight with the security guard.
Then he got arrested for the 27 hits.
He got charged with whatever with an intent to sell and all this other stuff.
And additionally, he had warrants out for his arrest.
So the guy then spent the next couple of months in jail.
And he called me on Bended Knee because he had a dog that needed taken care of.
And we were all supposed to move out of that house.
A month later, and he was like, I need you to help me move the shit out of the house.
Please, and I was like, you know what, man?
Go fuck yourself.
Shudden just revenge or whatever they call it.
Shroding fraud.
Shroding you said Irish goodbye.
I said, yeah, I said, I said, I said, sure, all that.
I'll be happy to do that.
And I never did a thing.
I did take care of the dog though.
I got the dog off to a good place. It was the master. It was the master's and it is the master's.
Yeah, I count him out of the country.
Now you can put him in the car. Yeah, Clint will never fuck with you again. Oh, I did.
I sent him off to a farm. The happy farm in the sky. What was the first episode that
was broadcast on YouTube? Was a 21, the scream of a Dean was a 23 they called me the HODLY was it 22 dry hump day
What's it 20 give me a bozgolo?
Give me a buzz glow a bozgolo. Give me a bozgolo. Oh, bozgolo. Wait, read them one more time
A Bowskalo. Give me a Bowskalo.
A Bowskalo.
Wait, read them one more time.
The Scream of a Dean, which was 21, 23, they called me the HODLY.
22, Dry Hump Day, or D, give me a Bowskalo.
I might go with the 23, they called me the HODLY.
I think it was Dry Hump Day.
I think that's what it was, because I remember being in here recording that episode.
It's C, Dry Hump Day.
Dry Hump Day.
I remember that was the first time we were in this was the first time we're in the studio together
So as a 23s we first started doing the YouTube. Yeah, we first started but we first started publishing the the videos for YouTube on 20
22
What was the first episode you both recorded in the TCB porn studio?
Yes, that's what I was thinking.
Were we recording stuff on YouTube before we were together?
Yeah, we were.
I think we were actually screen-shotting the...
Yeah.
Okay.
The first episode that I recorded in the TCB porn studio was it was a one-man act.
It was a one-man play. It was called, it was called Wack this way.
And it's kind of a pun on walk this way. It's called Wack this way. It's a 30-second masterpiece.
Okay, that was your first, but they're talking about two. Oh, together. Oh, together.
but they're talking about two. Oh, together, oh, together.
Oh, number 34, number 29, number 33, or number 31.
I think it was in the late 20s.
Okay, I'm gonna go early 30s.
I'm gonna go early 30s.
I'm gonna go early 30s.
You're saying early 30s, so you wanna go 31 or 33?
31.
31, okay, I'm saying 29, you're saying 31.
The answer is 31, look at I'm saying 29, you're saying 31. Uh, the answer is 31.
Look at that, nice work.
You know in your TCV shit.
Okay, uh, how many guests have you had on the show?
Aird episodes.
Aird.
Aird episodes.
Well, uh, not many.
Is it six, eight, nine, or five?
I'm going to say six. I don't even think it's that many. I don't think we've had it six.
Let's see. Let's go back through. We've had Rachel, Rachel and Jeff and Jeff. We had Dr. Senn. Dr. Senn. We had Oscar.
We had that lady from Married of Firstight, Michelle.
Oh, that's right.
We had Married of Firstight, lady.
And then, oh.
I think you're, I'm going, I'm going six as well.
And then Jeff Dwaskin, I think, was one.
I'm saying six.
Yeah, six.
Okay, six.
The answer is eight, six.
That's right.
Good job.
All right.
Now, how many guests have we actually had in the studio? Yeah, that's right job. All right. Yep. Now how many I'm gonna guess have we actually had
Probably close to 15. Yeah, but I'm sorry. I just didn't work out
Technical difficulties
What was the name of the governor's assistant for the bit in episode number three the Brian Kempiff?
Was it missy M Misha, Mini, or Misty?
I'm going Misty.
I'm going Misty.
Yeah, Misty.
Yeah, Misty is my brother's girlfriend
and I don't think I would have used her name
to do it like that.
Misty.
Yeah.
It's Misty.
Why we are killing this.
We've only gotten a few few wrong maybe one. Yeah
What would be the name of the show if it wasn't called T.C.B
What it'd be called 50 shades of green the great middle way
Sausage party
My big fat fabulous podcast
These are really funny.
These are good.
I don't know.
My big fabulous podcast.
I actually know this answer because I know what I had said I would call it if I didn't
call it the commercial break and I would call it the great middle way.
The great.
Yeah, Tony asked.
It's a stupid name and that's why we didn't use it.
Yeah, what he said that I a stupid name and that's why we didn't use it
Yeah, what you said that I was like that's definitely not it
You're like that's for sure not it. Yep, that's it
Mempho you're stupid
According to what Brian said on episode number 16 it is appropriate to send 30 to 50 text messages to somebody only if
You need someone to do you a favor, A, B, if you're texting your therapist
and sharing what you are feeling,
C, you're breaking up with them,
or D, you have an emergency.
Episode number 16, God.
Wow.
What was the first one again?
You need someone to do you a favor.
Maybe that one.
You guys see, I think it's if you break up with somebody.
I think that's it.
Okay.
The answer is see if you're breaking up with it.
Yeah.
And I only mean that I've only, I don't, yeah,
I've been through that experience, 30 to 50 text messages.
Don't do it, it's not okay.
You know here's the thing.
I understand that when you're breaking up with someone,
it could be a very emotional thing, right?
But I have a piece of advice in my older age.
Don't do the 30 to 50 text messages.
Oh, no.
It just looks desperate.
It's putting you in a position that's uncomfortable.
It's putting them in a position of power.
They know that you're just hurting them.
And it solves no issues whatsoever.
That's the most important thing.
It doesn't move the ball forward in any way, shape or form.
You know what you do? You rest, you relax, you meditate, you hire
prostitute, you get it out of your system. That goes for men and women. Sex work is work.
I'm just going to say that. When did you start saying best to you? Oh, episode number 40, episode number 67, episode number 75,
or episode number 53.
I think it's 67.
I was gonna say 67 too.
Yeah, I think we're about 33 episodes in on this.
50, 50 something though, but.
You think it's 53?
I don't know.
That would have been really early on in season number
67. 67. Okay, let's go. That's B. It's B episode of a 67. Okay, couple more. Yeah, here we go. How do you know your TCB or do you know your TCB?
What is the name of the dating app that Henry Fonda likes? Oh,
dating app that Henry Fonda likes. Oh.
P-Harmony.
Ha ha ha.
Mumble.
It's P-Harmony.
I remember it.
It's P-Harmony.
It's P-Harmony.
Thanks guys.
Somebody said.
Henry Fonda is definitely making
appearance here soon.
When did the first episode of the
commercial break air?
Publish April 16th, April 15th, April 13th,
or April 14th of 2020.
Oh my God, split in hair.
I think I know this.
I think I know this.
I think it's April 15th, 2020.
Tax day?
Tax day.
Well, I'm not doing my taxes,
mine is a start of podcasts. I'm not doing my taxes.
Start a podcast.
Not worried about the taxpayer.
No, no.
It's see, it's April 15th, 2020.
Look at that.
Okay.
Last one.
Last one, here we go.
What does it mean to be a brony?
Is it a man that loves brownies? A man that is...
I will.
A man that is fan of my little pony, a gay brother,
or someone who doesn't want to get a COVID vaccine.
A gay brother.
A gay brother.
What's up, brony?
How's that boy for any yours?
How y'all doing?
Ha!
Ha! Mimpho. It's okay to be gay. How y'all doing? Huh? Huh? Huh?
Huh?
Huh?
Huh?
Huh?
Mempho.
It's okay to be gay.
It's a brother.
I mean, brony.
Mempho, bring your gay brother.
Huh?
How many legs, brownies?
No, I know.
It's the my little pony.
Of course, it's my little pony.
That's just a well-known one.
That was an easy one.
Yeah.
Okay, all right.
So I think we did 25 and I think we got 23 of them.
Correct, either one of us got 23 correct.
That was good.
You know, like thinking back on this now,
it really doesn't seem like we've been doing that that much time
because this all seems very fresh in my head.
Like I don't think I struggled to remember one of these things.
Right, you remember trauma.
Yeah.
It comes back to you like that.
Yip, yip, yip.
Yip.
It has been fun.
It has been fun.
And we're going to continue on with the celebration.
We're going to continue on the celebration.
On to next week.
We're going on Friday.
Yeah.
Live on Firesoft. Yeah. If you're catching this, week, we're going on Friday. Yeah, live on Fireside.
Yeah, if you're catching this,
well, you're probably not catching this, right?
Well, no, if you're catching this on Friday,
we will be live at like 3.30, right?
Yeah, 3.33 is when we always go live.
3.33 of Friday.
Friday, September 3rd.
So if you're catching this in the morning
and you wanna get us on Fireside, go ahead and do that.
Otherwise, we'll actually release that episode.
We'll go back in one, two, three.
Yeah, we'll go back in really set episode.
Here's what I want to let you know.
We are going to be at Menfo 2021.
Yes, it's still going on.
October 1st, 2nd, go to menfofest.com
to get your tickets.
If you're going to be there, you must let us know.
Dial us up at 661 Best To You.
That's the word best, the number two, the word you.
Best to you. You can text
that in line directly. You can leave us a voicemail there if you'd like to.
I've started saying best to you all the time. Oh, I say it all the time. Yeah, I have friends
that say it back to me too. Best to you, brother. Yeah. Hey, what's up, bro? Best to you,
bro? How's that gay going? That's going great!
Thanks for asking.
Another thing that I want to let you know is that if you use one of the products or services that our sponsors are selling on this show, remember,
we'll never air a sponsorship that we wouldn't use ourselves or don't recommend or use ourselves.
If you would like, we are making a limited edition sticker,
a bumper sticker, a TCB bumper sticker.
And we're gonna make these every month or two,
we're gonna make a new one by a new artist
with new art for the commercial break.
If you would like one of those stickers,
leave a comment or a review on YouTube or Instagram
and or send us a picture of you
with one of our sponsors products. And then we'll send you a sticker. It's limited edition. We're only gonna run a picture of you with one of our sponsors products.
And then we'll send you a sticker.
It's limited edition.
We're only gonna run a couple hundred to be.
Yeah, get out to get your hands.
Get out to sticker pads.
Remember we said the sticker pads,
oh god, I used to collect those stickers.
What it was I thinking.
Actually, the sticker collection was probably
better than the Dic Tracy collection.
It's probably worse for. The Dic Tracy. Oh, the Dic Tracy collection It's probably worse for the Dic Tracy
Oh the old Dic Tracy collection
But anyway, we're gonna be giving away these stickers and we'll be at Mempho giving away the very first sticker
So make sure that you you know dial up that Mempho if you're gonna be there
Okay, go to tcbpodcast.com
Find all the show notes, read more about Chrissy and I, listen to all the audio, watch all the video
You can go to Instagram at thecommercialbreak
and youtube.com slash the commercial break,
subscribe, like, rate, review, do it is
what everybody else does, I don't know,
yeah, you know what to do, just help us out.
If you're so inclined, take a few minutes and do it
and we'll send you a sticker for it.
Just that easy, just that easy.
We'd like to thank Cass Box for partnering with us
to get us two men faux and allow us to record that.
And of course, the ever loving and wonderful Jeff Hodeley.
Oh, Jeff Hodeley.
Jeff Hodeley.
Ha ha ha ha.
He hates that.
Episode number 100 is in the can.
What can I say?
Woo woo.
We did it.
We did.
What's next?
I think that's it.
200.
We're going for 200.
Fire side.
Until fireside on Friday. That's right. But I mean, what's next? What is the next? I think that's it. 200. We're going for 200. Fire side. Until fireside on Friday.
That's right.
But I mean, what's next?
What does the next big celebratory number?
That's the square garden.
Number 200 Madison Square Garden.
Waffle House on Fulton Industrial Parfait.
Or Waffle House.
Yeah, that's the center for puppetry arts
in Johnson City, Tennessee.
Hi kids, we'd like to welcome the commercial break.
They told us they're a very wonderful puppet trick.
Hey, what's up, bro?
What's up, Brody?
You can't stay dick.
Say it, I'm gonna show it.
Remember, be a shower, not a grower.
All right, what else?
That's all we can do today.
Thanks to Gustavo, Allie, and Astrid, Allyson, Will, Reagan, everybody who supported us all along the way.
We appreciate it.
Roxanne.
Roxanne, I'm saying this as if we're never going to do another episode.
It's been great.
It's been great.
What else can we do today?
Nothing.
So I'll say I love you.
I love you.
Best to you.
Best to you out there in the podcast, audience and until 101.
We will say bye.
Bye.
The commercial break.
New episodes on Tuesdays and now Fridays.
New YouTube clips drop daily at youtube.com.
Slash the commercial break.
Visit tcbpodcast.com for access to our entire media library.
Follow us at the commercial break on Instagram.
Each episode is written and produced by Brian Green co-hosted by Chrissy Hodley with So. I'm going to be a little bit more careful.
I'm going to be a little bit more careful.
I'm going to be a little bit more careful.
I'm going to be a little bit more careful.
I'm going to be a little bit more careful.
I'm going to be a little bit more careful.
I'm going to be a little bit more careful.
I'm going to be a little bit more careful.
I'm going to be a little bit more careful.
I'm going to be a little bit more careful.
I'm going to be a little bit more careful.
I'm going to be a little bit more careful.
I'm going to be a little bit more careful.
I'm going to be a little bit more careful.
I'm going to be a little bit more careful.
I'm going to be a little bit more careful.
I'm going to be a little bit more careful.
I'm going to be a little bit more careful.
I'm going to be a little bit more careful.
I'm going to be a little bit more careful.
I'm going to be a little bit more careful.
I'm going to be a little bit more careful.
I'm going to be a little bit more careful.
I'm going to be a little bit more careful.
I'm going to be a little bit more careful. you