The Commercial Break - Loposphere Troposphere Angels, Hallelujah!
Episode Date: April 5, 2023Bryan & Krissy watch one of Kenny Copeland's mind twisting sermons. They're like hostage negotiation...for your wallet! Bryan’s mom has had a dramatic time at Shady Pines Bryan discovers misophoni...a and realizes he has Blue-ophonia What can cure this? Prayer? A lady on tiktok who lost her toes says that they have grown back after she prayed Joel Osteen makes 54 million dollars a year & has a 70,000 sqft home Let’s just stop giving them so much money! Kenny Copeland talks about the laws of prosperity Must he always...speak...like…this?! Kenny's got the colourless eyes of the devil and too many teeth! Truly what the hell is this guy talking about? Can I get an AMEN! If there's one thing he's gonna do, its bamboozle the audience When you dont know what you're talking about just say glory to God! This…is…huge... The baby knows! That hillsong music, it’s just as good as Celine Dion It's edging for religion Fuckin' angels dont know shit... LINKS: Send us show ideas, comments, questions or concerns by texting us or leaving a voicemail at: 1.855.TCB.8383 Speak to TCB LIVE by calling 775.TCB.LIVE (1.775.822.5483) Tuesday-Thursday 12pm-5pm EST Watch TCB on YouTube Creator: Bryan Green Co-Host: Bryan Green Co-Host: Krissy Hoadley Written By: Bryan Green Exec Producers: Bryan Green & Krissy Hoadley Content Production & Research: Tina Khano YouTube Producer & Editor: Morgan Please Audio Editing: Christina A. Executive Director: Astrid B. Associate Producer: Gustavo Episodic Contribution: Marianne, Diane, Natalie, Will The Champ, Will D** Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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I have to make a standing announcement every single Sunday night.
I did it just last night.
God did not tell you to lay hands on me and play over me.
I have to do that all the time because I let my guard down a few times and we had some witches come in,
lay hands on me and pray and I'm telling you it rocked my world.
I'm telling you witchcraft is real.
In the spirit realm, you better be able to see that stuff.
And I got sick.
It messed my flesh up.
I was having nightmares.
And I'm like, what in the world?
On this episode of the commercial break.
This is what Kenny is doing. He's like, when you put the stove five in the manifold and then the
angels come down through the cirrus, you all getting into the lobes fill and the tropis
Feel you understand
The next episode of the commercial break starts now
Yeah, Katz again, welcome back to the commercial break. I am Brian Green
This is my dear friend and co-host, Kristen Joy, hopefully best to you, Kristen.
Best to you, Brian.
Best to you out there in the podcast universe.
So you know, my mom lives over at this, like,
Shady Pines.
Shady Pines retirement village.
And, you know, it's not a medical facility.
It's just a place where older folks gather,
and they get a little extra help,
they get all their meals for them,
and they get games and prizes,
and, you know, all kind of stuff.
It's like a cruise ship sitting in the same place but it's a really nice place. I
mean we we make sure my mom is taken care of and so my mom this is the second
place she's been and the first place that she was been and she called me
I'm gonna be like hi mom and I'd be like hi mom I almost well I I got in a big fight
today and I was like you got in a big fight today.
And I was like, you got in a big fight?
Yeah.
Where?
Well, you know Judy from Toledo?
Yes mom, you don't have to tell me where they're from.
Okay, well Judy from Toledo and Bob from Iowa.
We're talking about something but Bob wouldn't shut his mouth when he was eating the food.
He was like, and I just got so annoyed, I told him shut the fuck up.
And I was like, whoa mom. I can't take it, I told him, shut the fuck up.
And I was like, whoa, mom.
I can't take it, it's a drive me crazy.
And I'm like, mom, you can't just be yelling at people
in the dining room because they're making noises.
Like, you know, older people are older people.
She's one of the younger people in there.
But she's like, I'm like, older people are older people,
mom, you know, there's some full grown ass men that I know,
that do not know how to chew their mouth when they close their mouth when they chew.
Is it obnoxious? Yes. Do I hate the sound? Absolutely. Is it something that drives me crazy? No, I just ignore it.
You know, but my mom doesn't have that ability. Pick your battles in life. You got to figure out which hill to die on.
I often say this about marriage. I'm smarter. I'm better. I'm I'm I'm mean and mean marriage machine. Why?
I'm smarter, I'm better, I'm, I'm, I'm lean and mean marriage machine. Why?
Because I learn which hills I want to die on.
My first marriage, every hill I wanted to die, every hill I had to be right.
And, and, and to be fair, both of us did, right?
Which is probably, yeah, yeah.
That's why we're not together.
Lovely human being and, and, you know, and I am too.
But anyway, I said, mom, you gotta stop this.
I know, but I can't do it.
It's everybody's so annoying in there.
There's a good check, check, check, check, check, check,
and they sneeze and they don't cover their mouths.
I'm like, mom, just ignore it.
Just ignore it.
Just eat what you want to eat.
Ignore it, leave it alone.
Don't worry about it.
I can't, it literally gets in my head.
It gets in my ears.
I can't get it out of my head.
So she's been in multiple little,
let's call them incursions over at the shady pines.
School novels.
Yeah, like, and I mean, one time,
a guy threw a pot of coffee on my mom.
What?
Yes.
Yes.
Through a pot of coffee on my mom.
Wow, she really pissed me off.
She, I guess like, well, this guy apparently
was unhinged anyway.
Yeah, well. But there was, like, the police were apparently was unhinged anyway. Like, yeah, well.
But there was, like, the police were almost called
on this whole situation.
I wanted the police call, but it ended up
that cooler heads prevailed, but it was just like a nasty situation.
So I'm like, I can't understand for the life of me
why my mom gets so upset at these noises
that these people are making.
But then I read this interesting article today,
and I'd like to share it with you.
Okay.
One in five people have misophonia,
which sounds like a phony disease in and of itself,
but let's move on.
If you've ever heard,
if you've ever had a visceral reaction
to certain sounds such as sniffing, coughing, slurping,
you might have misophonia.
You're far from the only one, a new study
published in the PLOS-1 journal,
shows that nearly one in five
people in the U.K. are affected by misophonia. Researchers gave 772 people a questionnaire to
understand the intensity and complexity of misophonia, judging noise, triggers, and reactions.
The participants expressed, uh, were the general population. What is misophonia? It's the experience,
were the general population. What is misophonia?
It's the experience of misophonia
is more than just being annoyed by a sound.
Misophonia can cause feelings of helplessness
and being trapped when people can't get away
from unpleasant noises.
One in five people have this.
Do you have a particular sound
that you could not sit there and listen to
without getting upset?
No, I don't think so.
I do, it's a commercial break.
Ah!
It's set up on April 1st, 15 minutes of the show,
just a set up that joke.
No, I don't know.
I mean, maybe if somebody's incessently coughing.
Yeah, incessently coughing, you know what I-
I apologize whenever I have,
I mean, I very rarely get sick, not going to one here,
but if I do have a bad cough,
I apologize, I'm like, I'm so sorry, this is annoying me.
You have to, yeah.
It's gotta be annoying you.
I could think of one, and that one that I thought of
was dogs panting.
So, I'm not talking about like after a dog runs.
I'm talking about when they open up their mouth
and they breathe.
They're alive.
Drives me fucking crazy.
They're alive, but they're like blue.
Sometimes she's perfectly fine.
She's, you know, whatever.
But then she opens up her mouth.
But it's loud and it can go on for hours. Oh.
And if it goes on for more than about five minutes
and I'm in no other noises in the room,
yeah.
I can get really irritated real quick.
It's gonna be in your AirPods.
Yeah, that's when I put in my AirPods.
Well, I always have my AirPods in.
It's called, uh,
uh,
Sun number one and daughter number two.
Those two are never stop talking to me.
So I really think I do have this in a separate contained version,
like I'm not throwing a pot of hot coffee on my dogs.
You know, I just took Nico to the doctor
and sent him off to the pasture.
He was sick, he was sick, so I know.
So I think that I might have a bit of this.
And now I think I have some understanding as to why mom
has such a hard time with some of these noises. I think she I might have a bit of this. And now I think I have some understanding as to why mom has such a hard time with some of these noises.
I think she might have this and it's causing her
to feel trapped and helpless,
even though she doesn't understand what's going on.
Yeah, it can't stand it.
So I'm gonna get my mom a pair of earmuffs
and I just want her to wear them to the...
That's not the...
I'm gonna get her an ipod with just the commercial break on it.
Just play it and repeat.
I'm gonna get my mom some earmuffs, I think.
Okay.
Yeah, I mean, that's like, right?
Like get her some ear plugs,
she can put in when people are eating.
Sure.
So she doesn't get so annoyed and upset by everybody.
Yes.
That's one way.
There's gotta be a way to cure this.
Like, you know, besides ear plugs,
Zanax, some medication.
I was gonna say medication. Yeah, like, you know, what isplugs, Xanax, some medication. I was gonna say medication.
Yeah, like, you know, what is that medication
everybody's using now?
They could, it's so,
it was so, or we go v, whatever they call it,
and they're everybody's using it for dieting
and having horrible, the runs for days on end
and throwing up every meal and passing out in places,
but it's worth it, because I lost six pounds.
Yeah.
And there's gotta be like an off label medication
that can cure, you know what the,
maybe it's prayer.
Maybe prayer is what cures this.
Well, meditation, prayer.
Meditation, prayer.
Prayer is a form of meditation, I think.
It is.
Yeah, I think it is.
So one lady on TikTok has been running around
claiming that she lost four of her toes in
an accident.
She had some kind of accident, it was a horrible accident, I wanted to diminish the accident,
I didn't want to talk about, like, I don't want to get into the particular details.
But the car?
No, it was worse than that.
Yeah, no, it was worse than that.
But she had some damage and they had to, like, her toes were all gone, basically.
Oh, gosh.
She is now claiming that in one night of prayer, intense prayer, that her toes have returned.
And she's posting pictures of it on the internet.
They're like growing, growing back.
They're all the way back.
It was returned over time.
Miraculously.
They returned overnight.
And so.
That's the viral do for you.
Yeah. Now this is being like repeated and repeated on the internet. This, this story
of prayer. This again goes to show you.
Growing toes. Growing toes. This goes to show you that these prosperity preachers are right.
Exactly.
They can probably get rid of your miscellaneous. They can certainly grow back your toes.
Yeah.
And they can probably make you terribly rich.
Terribly rich.
Well, you just take what yours.
Yeah, you just take what yours.
Just claim it.
Just claim it.
Because if we know one thing about these preachers
that are preaching the prosperity of gospel,
like Joel Osteen and our good friend Kenny Copeland,
a couple others we've reviewed,
if we know one thing,
is that they had those people sitting out there
in the pews, the thousands and thousands of people and the people watching them on TV, their lives are so
much financially better off for having done that.
I mean so much better off, Chrissy.
Basically everyone who walks in to Joel Osteen's house of prayer, boom, billionaire instantly.
You know, there's like, you have to give it away to get it back.
Yeah, that's right.
You have to give all of it away, including your 1992 Honda Celica,
which is what we reviewed a couple of a couple of months ago.
We reviewed a guy who claimed he gave, he didn't have anything.
So he gave them the keys to his 1992 Honda Celica.
This is like 2008, by the way, I think he was basically looking for a place
that dumped his toxic. He was looking
for a tax ride off. Yeah, he was looking for a tax ride off or a way to get away from
death. Fucking EPA who was going to come and talk about crime in that car and needed
to get rid of it. Yeah, that's true. Nothing like taking the murder car and giving it to Joel
Osteen. So he gave this car away and then he now he's a multi-millionaire
with his own business and it's all because yeah it's all because he gave this car away and so.
And I mean it's true if people just say it. If you just say it out loud it makes it true. If it
happens to one out of one million people it's true for everybody. It's the most ridiculous thing
I've ever heard. Now I believe in the power of positivity. I meditate and I think that's prayer. I'm not busting on the religion.
If you are into it, cool.
If it makes you a better person, cool.
If your form of meditation is prayer, cool.
What I don't like, what we don't care for.
And what I think is fair game is people who are asking
for your money under the guise of biblical passages.
That is fucked up to me.
Yeah.
Way fucked up.
So we talked about this a couple episodes ago.
Did you know that Joel Olstein makes $54 million a year.
That's what he's paid by his church for his services.
$54 million.
That's the going right.
70,000 square foot house.
70,000 square foot house. 70,000 square foot house.
He's like so typical righteous Jim Sons.
I can't wait till that show come back on age.
Yeah, I know.
By the way, it's so good.
I wish they would just have one of these preachers on Forreal.
Like I wish Jim Baker or one of these guys
would just like play himself or herself in this.
I would love that.
That would be brilliant.
One of the biggest frauds in television buffoonery,
in my opinion, our opinion,
and the very first breakdown video clip breakdown
that we ever did was Kenny Copeland, Kenneth Copeland,
who claimed to have blown away the coronavirus by Frank.
And then there he is playing.
He blew away a tornado with his plan.
Yeah.
I told my boy's ass in, look at that.
Look at that.
Blow it away.
Big O!
With you, darling.
Big O!
Budget dipshit.
Kenny Copeland is of course the prosperity preacher
of prosperity preachers.
He's been, some of these, what was that inside preachers. He's been some of these.
What was that inside edition?
He's having prosperity.
Oh, yeah.
No problems with him.
He's walking with the Lord every morning in his robe made of literal gold.
Gold leaf.
Yeah.
While you live in your trailer drinking fego, wondering how you're going to pay the
mortgage.
He was cornered by inside addition.
No way.
For, remember, we reviewed this for buying Tyler parodies. He was cornered by inside edition. No way.
For, remember, we reviewed this for buying Tyler Perry's $120 million private plane.
And he laughed at this reporter because this is what he said.
I wish I had this clip.
I should have thought about this a little bit more, but he laughs and he says, well, well,
you know, Tyler such a godly man.
He gave me, he made me an offer.
I just couldn't refuse.
He gave it to him is so cheap.
So now he has not one, not two, not three,
four separate private planes
for the Kenneth Copeland Ministries
because he needs to be.
He got a scoot around.
That's right.
And when someone asked him one time
why you needed to fly privately,
why couldn't you just fly with everybody else? He said that they have one plane have have one
One Chrissy and I would take one plane I
Would take a
1992 Honda
With some wings attached to it
And I try and go fast enough out of my driveway to get a little lift.
You know what I'm saying?
Like you get out of the future to camp here.
That's right.
Clear for landing.
And cleared for landing.
I just see the little Celica with like cardboard wings on it.
And you are on the higher outside.
Like I got to pop the clutch! Pop the clutch!
T-C-B 2021-20? Line up and wait. T-C-B 2021, whatever. We got a little problem with one wings we got a we're gonna tape it up and we'll be ready to go
did you say tape
tape to uh... tcb 2020 tape that's right tape
okay uh... just stand by for a few seconds before we all
get a better better view
we've got the fire department waiting halfway down the runway.
Usually when there's an accident, like a fire department will be waiting for somebody, they have an emergency.
Yeah, I can see them like calling the fire department before we even get out of the gate.
We're going to have the fire engine follow you down.
Oh, sorry, the fire engines are going much faster than you. So we're going to have them the ditch. I would take that plate, but Kenny
has a 25 seat. Oh, God. Fucking whatever it is, you know, bombardier, layer, jet, whatever
it is. Honestly, this is just, it's gotten ridiculous, guys. It's gotten ridiculous.
We you are you and I say you. I say anybody who's giving to these guys
are making them incredibly wealthy
while you are just poor for having done that.
You could pray along with them.
You know, if you can afford to tie,
then that's what you choose to do.
Okay, tie.
Stop giving these guys airplanes.
Stop giving these guys 70 foot, 70,000 square foot.
Who, what human being named 70,000 square feet under roof?
What's, I have 12 children, 12 to 14 children.
He lost count.
I have 12 to 14 children, and I, I could fit, you know,
10 of my houses, 12 of my, 15 of my houses,
inside of one of Joel Lillstein's properties,
it's getting ridiculous.
But let us take a moment and hear it.
Or even if you want to give the money, I have this to say, give the money, but then I
don't want those guys to use it for their own personal, like give it to pass it on to
charities to help, help society.
That's right.
Do something good with it.
Joel Oosteen is the mother fucker who closed the doors when Houston flabbed.
He closed the fucking doors and said that people couldn't go sleep in there or take shelter
in there.
That's awful.
That's awful.
It's awful.
That seems counter.
Counter-intuitive.
Yeah.
To what?
To what?
To what?
To what?
To what? To what?
To what?
To what? To what? To what? To what? To what? to the Jesus Christ spirit, which I firmly believe in, not Jesus Christ as our Savior, our Lord,
but the Jesus Christ spirit.
And I think that's a pretty cool story
that we should all be paying attention to
a little bit more than less right now.
And Joel fucking hosting the guy who's, you know,
the face of Jesus of, you know, new age Christianity
in America in 20, whatever, since 2000.
That guy couldn't even be bothered
to let people take a sleeping bag
and sleep in the hallways of his church, God forbid,
his carpet get ruined.
Yeah.
So he can't take an extra million out of his 54 million
to get the carpet replaced and his incredibly ridiculously
large church with television cameras, lighting and fireworks.
Fucking crazy.
But, let us all settle down, let us give a chance,
let us give them a chance to explain
why prosperity preaching makes sense.
Mm-hmm.
So let's listen to one of our favorites,
Kenny Copeland, talking about the laws of prosperity.
G-Z-B!
Hey you, guess you, I hate to interrupt all the fun, but I just want to remind you that T-C-B podcast.com is where you find all the audio and the video
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So let's take a minute to hear from our sponsors and then we'll be back to this episode of
the commercial break. Now this video is very long.
We're not going to have a chance to cover it all.
We'll have a chance to cover just the first few minutes.
Because we can't stop talking over everybody.
But I just wanted to share that at some point we'll have to press stop, but maybe we'll
get back to it.
Okay.
Here's Kenny. Oh, wait, hold on a second. I forgot to do everything that at some point we'll have to press stop, but maybe we'll get back to it. Okay. Okay, here's Kenny.
Oh, wait, hold on one second.
I forgot to do everything that I always do, which is,
Chrissy, I was trolling on the internet.
As you do.
As I do like to do, what happened to that, Brian?
What do you do?
And you're losing to Slippin'.
We got Slippin'.
I think Kenny.
You're that little train that couldn't slide in back down the hill.
Ken dog.
Ken dog.
Ken dog.
Ken dog.
It's okay dog. Do me a favor, can you blow my small penis away? Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, our evening offering. I want to let's receive our evening
offering. I'm going to take my willy-hoo-hoo-hoo out, put it right here on the
pulpit. You are everyone in the audience to bend over while I give you your
offer. It's just some things tonight that have to do with the mysteries of the kingdom of God.
Do you have to say it like that? I guess you have to say it like that. Yes, that's how. We're we're we're keen new God King the oh
And one of them
You my I don't play
Hey follow me
Oh, that's good. Oh, that's good. That's so good. Oh, that's so good. Oh, that's good! Oh, that's good!
That's so good.
Oh, that's so good.
At Luke Chapter 8 to begin with.
I love when they break out the passages.
Oh, yeah, you have to.
You gotta back it up.
Yep.
They are packed in their like-
Oh, wait, no, please.
Oh, yeah, he's rolling up his sleeves.
By the way, that's a suit cost more than this entire studio.
They are packed in their tight, aren't they?
You think that's for the camera angle, probably.
Yeah.
Verse 1, it came to pass afterward that village, preaching, showing the glad tidings of the kingdom of God.
Speed it up, Kenny.
Yeah, come on.
Let's get through it.
We all know the kingdom and the tidings and all that other shit.
Great.
Let's talk about your airplane.
Now, but this is important because it's important to listen to how he's twisting the word of the Bible.
Oh, yeah, I was about to say the word of the Lord.
He's actually the word.
The word, the word of Luke.
And the 12 were with him.
And I am.
I like to say my prepositions correctly.
The King, I am certain women,
which had been healed of evil spirits and infirmities.
Like missing toes.
Now here are three prominent women that went with him
throughout every city and village,
where he was preaching and showing.
You see there? He looks evil.
He looks evil.
He looks like the eyes.
Yeah.
He literally looks like the devil.
Yeah.
Like when you think of a caricature of devil,
you think of the Ken,
Kenneth Copeland to me is the face of evil.
Yeah.
And his eyes are like, they're no color.
They're like, clear.
And they're like, clear.
His eyes are clear.
His teeth are like, he's got too many teeth. They're vampire teeth. I know it's I want to look away. Yeah, I know
How do you who sleeps with this guy?
Yes, lots of young boys
Allegedly, allegedly
settle down I think
three prominent
settle down. I think.
Three prominent women that had been healed of evil spirits and
infirmities, Mary called Magdalene, out of whom went seven
devils.
He doesn't even know his own Bible.
He's reading it as if he's never read it before.
Magdalene.
Yeah.
It's Mary Magdalene.
Yeah.
Let's get it together.
Joanna, the wife of Kuzah, Herod steward, and Susanna, and many others, which ministered
onto him of their substance.
So he had with him screened.
Oh, I'm sorry.
This just popped up on the bottom of the screen.
So it has his name, Kenneth Copeland, but then in the lamp.
It says two.
A woodblock?
Yeah, it's a woodblock.
Back from 2013, and where he's preaching is called the Southwest Believers Convention.
Maybe I think of like South by Southwest.
Yeah, South by Southwest.
South by South.
This is like.
It's kind of like a guitar.
Yeah, this is like these annual conferences where they just get a bunch of fucking money.
They get everyone all hyped up on the music and the preaching and then they tell them to
break out their checkbooks.
These people make a ton of money on these conferences.
Prominent women that had been healed of
Infermentage and who points like who points with three fingers? I
Did one in the stink and two in the pink
And I
Did the shocker for good measure. If you get them in the taint, the anus and the clitoris.
And you are ready to rock.
He's a bit of a fool.
He's used it because it's in that's what the flight attendants do.
Oh, yeah, the flight attendants, yeah, they use their, no, they use their like their hands folded like this. Yes.
The emergency exits are located
Like this, the others are looking, they're looking awesome.
Thank you for flying down, son
All right, all right now
We know Jesus preached,
because in the fourth chapter of Luke 18 first,
he stood up, found the place where it was written,
61st chapter of Isaiah.
He knows every passage that has to do with money
by the back of his hand, like the back of his hand,
his creepy old, weird fingers.
Yeah, the back of his three fingers, one in the back of his hand, like the back of his hand, his creepy old, weird fingers. The back of his fingers.
Yeah, the back of his three fingers, one in the pink.
And two in the stink.
But now, I gotta say, I gotta say,
did anybody understand the story in the first place?
Oh, something about prominent women.
Three prominent women.
You're a prominent woman.
Gured by Jesus, walking down, showing the glad tidings
that they had gotten.
I'm assuming that means
that they're collecting offerings or something like that for Jesus. And he's, I don't really know,
don't claim to know the Bible all that well, even though I've read it 3,000 times because I was
obligated to do so at school. But now he's about to twist this all around that his airplane is
justified. And said the Spirit of the Lord is upon me for he has anointed me to preach.
And said, the Spirit of the Lord is upon me for he has anointed me to preach. And the scripture said, he proclaimed that, or he preached that throughout all of
Judea.
So he preached that same sermon, the blessing of the Lord, the blessing of Abraham.
Nobody had ever heard it.
All they heard was the Lord.
No one had ever heard it.
I, Broke the point one in it. Hi. That's eyebrows. I know.
I know.
I know.
His eyes.
Aaaaaah.
OK, now I'm going to take a picture of this.
I hate when Chrissy takes pictures in the middle of our recording, but it's too good.
Yeah.
YouTube.com slash the commercial break.
You got to check this out.
Here.
We can.
Oh. Oh. Look at crazy. He is crazy. He's a crazy human being that everyone believes
has some special powers. He's that's right.
He came preaching the blessing of Abraham and you're the seed of Abraham. You're blessed and didn't know it.
Oh, and they wondered.
I got a tickle in my pickle. He's getting excited because he's talking about his favorite subject,
which is fucking you out of your money. The gray squards that proceeded out of his mouth.
And these three women gave their testimonies.
Three women were given the testimonies to me last night.
I got a blowjob. Can you see it? I mean, he's preaching and these women standing
up and showing read again there what it said. Showing their bosoms $4. Oh, Kenny, you don't even know the passage.
You're talking about.
We're going back to the Bible because he forgot what he was talking.
He forgot, he got so deep in his own bullshit, he forgot his bullshit.
And showing the glad tidings of the kingdom of God.
Wow, you hear somebody?
Wow.
Wow, you hear somebody? Wow.
That's it.
That's if they understand the word that's being said right now.
How can you follow it?
I could just say wow all the time too.
Wow.
Oh, now round God.
Showing.
Listen, the glad tidings of the kingdom of God. He was preaching and they were
testifying and the blessing of the Lord had just fall all over the place. They
thought, wow, look at this. Look who they are, man. I mean, we've been told
God when they're having a thing to do with any one of those three women. But look,
look at that. They've been healed. Evil spirits left their
lives. Look at them. Look at those women standing up there.
They'll be there. They're a brightest sunshine. Whoa,
go in there, God. And great, marvelous and wonderful things
happen. Amen. Now. Amen. Amen.
Do I get an amen? Question mark. Like the old Bill Cosby. Amen.
Sue. A question mark. Oh, why's it? It doesn't it do. Now I'm passing the basket right
to you. Are you with me? You have a check for God? Amen. Okay, amen. He
began to preach then and you come on down and he began to talk
about the sore one out the so seed. Now notice this in verse 10
and he said unto you it is given to know the mysteries of the kingdom of God and he's talking
about the mystery of seed time and harvest the mystery of the hundredfold
return. What? How do you get that out of that? There is what he just bamboozled you.
He just bamboozled you if you are so in-
It's called a transition.
Yeah, that's called a transition.
And it's smooth as rubbing your dick on a cheese grater.
That was unbelievable.
Yeah, mysteries.
All of a sudden means mystery of seed.
Seed harvest time and money.
100 fold return, 100% ROI.
Unbelievable.
Every director of marketing, also known as a seat warmer,
who's ever had that job,
trying to figure it out and Kenny here figured it out,
right, and Judah, 818 or whatever.
Let's listen to that again,
because I think it's important.
He just bamboozled.
Oh yeah.
Mystery of seed time and harvest,
the mystery of the hundredfold return.
Now who was the king?
And that's, there is a mystery of the hundredfold return
because that's a guy who's been a seat warmer a couple times
It's really hard to get 100% ROI. It's really hard to get a hundred percent ROI to spend a dollar to make one exact dollar
They say a hundred times one X is that one thousand percent for every dollar you get a hundred oh
That's a thousand percent return well forget about it
I've only done that one time in my entire career. And that's when I was selling dollar spots. And I heard because you know what? When you
have zero dollars and zero cents on last year's PNL and you sell three hundred dollars worth
of streaming spots the next year. That's three000 percent return. It's crazy. Brian's a magician.
Just the 12. No, no, no, no, back up. Back up to where we begin. Look at that again.
Like he's telling them. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, forget to check, don't stop writing the check. I need an extra zero. Give me a second to bamboozie a little bit more. In village preaching showing the glad tidings of the kingdom of God and the 12 are with him
and certain women and Susanna and many others which ministered to him of their substance.
Glory to God. Glory to God. I don't even know what that means.
He says glory to God when he doesn't even know what he's talking about.
So that you think he knows what he's talking about and you can be in the know, see,
if I'm Kenneth Copeland and I'm running this scam on everybody for many, many years
and I don't even know what I'm talking about and I say stuff like, Glory to God.
Just to pretend like I know what I'm talking about when someone reports back to me when someone calls back and says
Right, I go that guy doesn't know the fuck he's talking. I just said bullshit in my head
I'm like, he's an asshole. Yeah, they're good. They're right for the pick is it's the people who are looking confused that I'm concerned about the people who are like
Partners with it He had people that had drawn themselves to his ministry.
They were showing money into what he was doing.
And he turned around.
Oh my God.
What a cynical, what a cynical, cynical, shitty point of view.
Jesus, I have, I went to Catholic school all my life and never once did any of
the priests or nuns or pastors or anybody who was teaching us religion classes where we
repeatedly read through the entire Bible and gave it its proper place and catacism perspective,
never once. Did they ever take the story of
Jesus Christ and start talking about his business partners. I mean come on the
fuck.
Kenneth it wasn't that Jesus LLC man that's tough. And it's said to them, nah, nah, hey, folks, this is huge.
Oh my gosh, we have this exact same clip, don't we?
I've cut this up before.
This is huge.
That's it.
He says it multiple times.
He says it multiple times.
He turned around and said,
it is given to you to know.
To know.
It is given to you to know.
You have come to me and I am giving what I have to you and it is given to you to know.
I want you to see the one brother in this crowd,
the one African American, the one black guy in this crowd.
Well, I mean, there's other black people in the crowd,
but this one that's being shown
on this particular camera angle, I want you to look at him.
He is crazy, he's like, he does not believe
a word of this bullshit.
He's like, I'm gonna take my money.
No, sorry rebad.
Mama did raise no fool.
The mysteries of the kingdom of God,
the mystery of the hundred fold,
the mysteries of divine health,
the mysteries of seeking first the kingdom of God
and his righteousness and all things being added to you you right in the middle of all that turmoil out there where they're all running around you know.
Like somebody left the door.
What?
What?
Runnin' around you.
Who's running around me in turmoil?
All those three ladies who got their toes back? What is going on here?
I'd be so confused. We should honestly go to one of these one time
Just to go through the ex-higher experience like a hill song a hill song is still around doing their thing
There's like now there's a new preacher named Judah that we're gonna review soon
Who's like got this new eight he really is the one that's with Justin Bieber now like this guy Judah and I got it
Judah, I know it's a weird name for a preacher, but I gotta say, I've watched a lot of Judah
to come up with some clips.
I actually like Judah.
I think Judah is full of shit and asking for money,
just like everybody else is,
but what he says in between that
is actually really spirited, like,
spiritual conversation.
It's not just about, I'm taking this passage,
I'm twisting it up so that you
can run your amics on my PayPal. And that's what Kenny's been doing. The entire time he's
been a preacher, 100 full for many years. Peter Popoff, Kenneth Copeland, you know, Benny
Hinn, they're all doing the same thing. And you guys, and I'm saying you guys like to,
let's just say us. And we continue to fall for it over and over and over again. It's fucked up
I'm on the chicken house man and all I'm trying to find something
Look at his shoes are those like zoot-soo shoes. Yeah, they are a zoo-choo shoes
They're a little flat with the white on top. I'm scared but you dab dab but do what you do
I'm gonna get your money. I'm gonna get you money. So take out to goddamn wallet
And here we are
No, the baby in the crowd that she's full of shit
Some of you may have thought that was my house, but it was
We just kind of catalog it alone.
Just believe in God.
You know, just get up right in the middle of everything and go to Texas.
What?
For a believer's convention.
I don't know.
A believer's convention.
He's all in his own bowl, right now.
He's like, if I am, if I create enough of a smoke screen,
they won't know where they are.
And so when I ask him for the wallet,
they'll do anything to get out of that current situation.
It's like a hostage negotiation.
But let's friendly.
Go to church for six days days all day and all night.
And the devil do his best to make you sick, make the kids sick, break down
everything you can to try to keep you from coming just to keep you from
hearing what I'm telling you right now. Amen but you can tell him why you are
a liar and a father of it. I'm going praise God.
It has been given on to me to know the mysteries of the kingdom of God.
Too bad, Mr. Devil.
You can't understand a thing.
We're saying because you don't know.
He's psychotic.
He is literally psychotic, but by being this animated by being this dramatic,
by the dramatic pauses and the low voices and the highs and the lows
He is emotionally pulling on your strings. Yeah, it's just like when we talked about the Hillsong music
How good this Hillsong music really is it's it's as good as any Celine Dion song you've ever heard
Yeah, and it emotionally charges you up. Yes, please be
Celine Dion and it emotionally charges you up. Yes, praise me, Celine Dia.
And it goes on for 26 minutes, constantly going up, edging, it's edging.
It is, edging.
Just like in Tantri Yoga, when you edge,
which means you get right up there,
and then you get back off,
and then you get right up there, and then you're back off.
And they do the same thing musically
and emotionally inside of these sermons,
and he's doing this right now
And that's why he's using his voice in such a weird way that also and he's a certifiable insane human being
He should be in a looney tune bin
Him and his fucking zoo to choose and we'll never know
Angels don't know everything
Don't that's right. They don't?
That's right.
Fucking angels.
I have been saying this to my wife for 20 years.
Fucking angels don't know shit.
Oh, it's coming down here, curing people and floating through the clouds.
I'm driving a ram 250 and I got 12 acres in woodland
new Arizona. I'm sorry, I think I love the guys, so that's right. That's right. He came back so quick.
That's what I'm saying. He's like, he if he had known this is all life Those angels are fall of it. If we go I'm gonna be like that's right full of shit
Get it
I would get crazy
Just got crazy. What if I just got as excited as he did
That's what needs to happen. I just need to get as excited as Kenny does about everything.
Evels don't know anything. And the scripture says, the manifold wisdom of God is made known to principalities and powers.
See, principalities and powers are not all devils.
Angels come under.
Yeah, not his.
And why is he talking about manifolds?
He's putting car parts in there.
Have you seen the TikTok trend where that one guy,
he's talking in all that weird scientific
language?
Oh my god, it's the funniest thing you've ever seen.
So I don't want to get into it because I can't do it right.
But he's like, the flux capacitor then turns into the Oblomong Bob Duda.
He says all these words that are not real words, but he's saying them so serious.
Right, confidently.
That you believe that what he's saying is true, but it's the funniest thing.
This is what Kenny is doing. He's the funniest thing this what can he is doing yeah
he's like when you put the stove pipe in the manifold and then the angels come down through the seris you all getting into the
lopus field and the tropus field you understand it
I don't know you. Principle of ideas and powers and jealous.
There's two thirds of them didn't fall.
But principality's in power and rulers.
I can't follow this.
Two thirds of them didn't fall.
He's talking about angels.
He's talking about the angels didn't fall down.
You know, the angels didn't fall down to hell.
It suits him to be in this universe,
when it's in this universe.
I'm taking a picture of that. That looks like he's about to kiss somebody with those
creepy lips of his man. He's got to make a bar to some makes a lot of money. I
buy. Oh yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And hair. Oh,
makeup and hair. You know, underneath that, that is pubic hair right there on top of his head.
God, promise you. The raffling' where's the cubic hair on his head?
I've seen it.
Yeah.
He's got ball hair on his head.
This world and wicked spirits in heaven and play.
They don't know anything.
The angels learn the manifold wisdom of God through the church. We find it out. They find it out. Amen. Amen. I just gave you a
whole other line of bullshit. Amen. Hello. My losing you. I talked about the principalities and the principalities and the manifold
And the angels and
Two thirds goes into one half six times
Three point four divided by two equals five
Hey man, huh?
Did I lose a dollar? What happened?
Ha ha ha ha!
You're not gonna pay me anymore!
Because you didn't believe that part!
Come on, most of it was good!
Oh my gosh!
Oh wow!
Wow!
What a day!
Who had a day here in the commercial place?
Non-stop laugh!
We should eat mushrooms more often.
Yeah.
Yup.
Good old Kenny Copeland.
We love him.
I'll tell you what, I'll save that video.
I'll press pause.
I'll put it on the server.
We'll get back to it.
And maybe next episode.
Yeah.
You know what I'm, that's just too fun.
It's an hour long video.
I think I could do the whole hour.
I think we could make a whole season
out of just this video of Kenneth Copeland.
I don't know if I can bear like my eyes
heard after looking at him.
I know, he's so disturbing.
Yeah, and listen, it's not about beautiful
or not beautiful, it's about genuinely scary
looking human beings.
Go look at Kenneth Copeland.
Go look at a recent picture of Kenneth Copeland
or go to youtube.com slash the commercial break.
And you can watch this episode in all its edited glory.
Morgan's gonna do a wonderful job.
She's gonna give you nice good closeups.
We love Kenneth Copeland.
I guarantee it.
Actually, Morgan, please give many good closeups
of Kenneth Copeland.
Ah, she would do it, she wouldn't even know.
Because Morgan's wonderful.
And Christine is wonderful.
And all the people that work with us and for us
are wonderful.
Thank you.
From Will the Champ to Roxanne, to Maryanne, Tina,
Astrid, Jeff, everybody.
Everybody who's working for us and with us,
we just really appreciate it.
What's that?
Kenneth.
Kenneth. I put Kenny on the
show yeah that's true if you ever felt from grace if you gotta give things if
you ever felt from grace and didn't have a job he's like bankrupt on the street
I'd hire him here really would just see what he smells like and then to put my
hands through his pubic hair all right so I told you about youtube.com slash the commercial break.
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So I'll tell you that I love you. I love you.
Best of you.
Best of you.
And best of you out there on the podcast universe
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Until next time, Chrissy and I always say we do say
and we must say goodbye.
Goodbye. I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad you