The Commercial Break - My Tragic Alter Ego

Episode Date: December 6, 2023

We’re all surprised Steve-O agreed to be on TCB We set expectations low Tina went to a star wars parody burlesque show We’re all weird in atlanta How did Santa get so skinny? Bryan pretending to like sports Subway, Jimmy Johns, & elephant murder A disturbing celebrity story TW: r*pe, SA, inc*st Bryan’s old country radio days Garth Brooks Garth as an emo rocker? VH1 Behind The Music Chris Gaines Best thing about music? Sex He was here for a tragic backstory He put out two albums with this alter ego Lying about dying Coming up with your own tragic backstory is so strange LINKS: Send us show ideas, comments, questions or concerns by texting us at: 1.855.TCB.8383 Call 626.ASK.TCB3 and leave us a voicemail Speak to TCB LIVE by calling 775.TCB.LIVE (1.775.822.5483) Tuesday-Thursday 12pm-5pm EST Watch TCB on YouTube Creator: Bryan Green Co-Host: Bryan Green Co-Host: Krissy Hoadley Written By: Bryan Green Exec Producers: Bryan Green & Krissy Hoadley Content Production & Research: Tina Khano YouTube Producer & Editor: Morgan Please Producer & Audio Editor: Christina A. Executive Director: Astrid B. Associate Producer: Gustavo Episodic Contribution: Marianne, Diane, Natalie, Will The Champ, Will D**  

Please! These guys... They're trying to murder me. Make a vision. Do you know these guys? Please! These guys... They're trying to murder me.

Please! These guys... They're trying to murder me. On this episode of the commercial break Did she marry Garth or Chris? I imagine she married both of them. This is probably an exciting bedroom. It gets three sums every night. Every single night. My husband and his husband are now at it.

That's right. I'm gonna pop one off as Garth, but then I'm gonna be back as Chris. Give me 15 to 20 minutes and one of and then I'm gonna be back as Chris. Give me 15 to 20 minutes, and one of those blue pills, I'll be back as Chris. The next episode of the Commercial Break starts now. Yeah, boy! Oh yeah, Cassie kittens, welcome back to the Commercial Break. I'm Brian Green. This is the director of online disasters. Tina, Tina, best of you. Best of you, Brian. Best of you out there in the podcast universe.

Thanks for joining us. So happy to be here. Are you happy to be here? I really am. Yeah, it's fun. Isn't it good fun? It is. It's great fun.

It's not a bad way to make a living. I think we could figure out how to make a living. I've been to Green Mar, we're still working on it. Hey, listen, you know, the ever-changing landscape of new media keeps us on our toes. Absolutely. That's for sure That's for sure, but let me not Drowned you in my own woes. Let's talk about other people's woes because that is what makes me happy

I love other people's music relies on our own lives So Steve O interview I think was generally well received Just to let you know, okay received just to let you know. Okay, glad to hear it. Glad to hear it. Thanks for the update. Generally well received. What a character, what a guy.

What's not to love. That's what I say. I was telling a friend over the weekend who was quite surprised that Steve O would even think about coming up on the commercial. We were too, don't worry. I shared the same reaction. I said, if you were surprised, imagine how surprised we were

when someone said, hey, Steve O wants to go on the show or Steve O agreed to come on the show It's probably the best way to say it. I don't want to make it sound like Steve O was knocking down our door He wasn't but I said listen I'm the guy goes he's like a Venice Wail and guy and he goes, hey man You have been telling me the listener me for months and months and months, you're not going to do guests. Guests didn't work. You did it one time. It didn't work. You're not going to have any more guests.

Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And then all of a sudden, you got fucking Steve O'on your podcast. And I said, well, I wanted to set expectations as low as possible. That's what it's about. So then, even if I just mumbled through the entire interview, you would be surprised that I had guests at all. Me, she and a accomplished brother. me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, whatever the whole goal is to set expectations as low as possible so that if you perform better, then it's a win.

It's a win. If you perform badly, then you said, hey, we didn't expect much anyway. That's right. And I was like, wow, what a game of misinformation to play. But not like I expected the politicians to be honest with. Standards here. That's right.

Standards here. In the truth of the matter is, we really didn't think we are going to have guests until very recently when we realized people would actually say yes, because I just didn't imagine anybody would want to come on the show. There was a time. There was a time. But not anymore. Three weeks ago.

Now, we've overcome the challenge. Chris, you will be back in studio with us sooner rather than later. I'm super happy to hear that. I'm so happy to hear that. And everyone's excited that she'll come back. So all the well wishes have been sent along. And we'll talk more about it when she gets back, but I just wanted to know,

Chrissy's in good shape and hopefully coming back to the studio very soon. Well, what'd you do over the weekend? Cause I think we were talking off Aaron, you did something very interesting. Tell the list. I went to a really fun live production of Empire Strips Back.

It's a Star Wars parody burless show. It was hilarious, sexy, and just my kind of good time. Okay, so I saved all the indefes questioning for on air. The Star Wars burlesque show, is it loosely based on the plot, or is it no plot whatsoever, just a lot of dancing? No plot whatsoever. I mean, they tried to set a plot. Yeah, but it's like a porn movie.

Yeah, there you go. It's all it is. It it's like a porn movie. Yeah It's just like it's all it is just like a porn movie. It was waiting for the Tits from the 80s. Yeah, it's cuz you see very little yeah, but the idea is there It's very very sexy. It's very racy. It's very sexy. But there is some nudity in it. Oh, yeah, there's a couple no full nudity Okay, but lots of boobs tons of ass at At this point in my life, I'm happy to crazy dancing, great music. The music was great. It was fun. Go looking characters. Absolutely. Yeah. Well trained. Well, so the performances were definitely top-notch. How big was the theater? I would say maybe 5,000. 5,000 people. That's

fucking a lot of people. It was big. Just the burlesque show. It was big. Yeah. Okay. I thought it would be like a more intimate In a land setting. Yeah, and lean has got a bunch. We're all weird. We're yeah, we're brudos here And we've got great venues. We figure you know Darth Vader was dick hanging out is probably it was Palantine Yeah, not Vader, but the other one. Yeah, Vader was a woman in this show. Oh, she was? Yes. Oh, I'm all about that. Yeah, it was worth the wait. It was definitely worth the wait.

It was like a lot of sexy girls in stormtrooper helmets. Yep. Yeah. And breastplates, and that's it. Oh my God. That was great. Yeah, I wanted to go check this out. I highly recommend it.

It's playing here in Atlanta, and I've seen the commercials for you. Yes. And at first I thought it was a joke. I was like, it's kind of a joke. I thought they were selling something. Shubaka break dances, it's fantastic. Yeah, I mean, clearly it's a pun, right? It's just, it's a parody.

And it's well written, it's pretty hilarious. Wow. I don't laugh all too easy, it's just about anything, but I laughed almost all the time. The last time that I allowed sex, boobs, nudity, to get me into a theater was for the naked Cirque du Soleil in Las Vegas. That would be worth it.

It was a little underwhelming to me if I'm being honest. I wasn't as impressed as I have been with fully clothed Cirque du Soleil. It's not to say that they weren't talented, people they're very talented doing their thing. But it's just, they kind of ran over the same old ground a number of times. Yeah.

How much can you really do, Naked? You know what I'm saying? It's gotta be tricky. It's gotta be way tricky. However, we did go see this last Cirque du Soleil, this one that's currently here in Atlanta. Yeah, I haven't seen it. At Lanta is one of those places

for those of you that don't live here, which is probably everyone in the sense of the show, because anyone who knows us has, no, doesn't give any shit. Atlanta is one of those places that Cirque de Soleil calls a second home. Yeah, it's a permanent. Yeah, three and a half months of the year, they have a show here and they set up this huge tent and it just kind of stays there for three and a half months downtown. They have a new one echoes, I think is what it's called. They have a moment in the show,

and it's way different than any other one I've seen. It's almost bordering on side show, like side show circus. They had a, what I assume to be, a father and a son duo, and the father comes out, he lays on his back, he kicks his legs up, and the son goes and sits on his legs.

And then he bounces them around for a few minutes, and then he pushes them up in the air, and the kid does a half flip, and you're like, wow, that's really cool. The kid, the kid, who I'm calling a kid, is probably a teenager, is not a small human being. And the father is not a particularly big human being. So I'm thinking, wow, half a flip, really cool. He's very good. Very nice. But then Tina, what happened over the course in the next three minutes was, I couldn't even comprehend what was going on,

because he started to flip his son. Full flips, full frontal flips, one after the other. He was kicking his, imagine the kid was laying, the guy had his, you know, his laying down, had his feet up in the air, like you would if you were playing airplane with the kid. Yeah, like rolling a lot. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

But the kid was on his back. So the feet were under, like right where the butt meets the back. Yes. He kept kicking him in the air and the kid would flip backwards and then land in the same place. He was doing this at his speed where it was hard for your eyes to adjust,

adjust how fast this kid was going. And this went on for 30 fucking full seconds. The guy just kept flipping him and flipping him and flipping him and flipping him and he landed every time. He did so disoriented it seems. I only deal with this is happening to you that the older you get like you do a little spin and then all of a sudden it takes you 15 to 20 minutes. That's your balance. Is this happening to you? Yeah, yeah. I remember when I was a kid I could go on that, you know, a thing on the playground and they could spin me around for days and I'd get off and walk straight. I don't know. Not anymore. Not anymore. The older that I get,

the more disoriented I get. Just by looking at it. Yes, just by looking at it. Then my daughter wants to dance and have me spin it around. I take her on one twirl and I'm serious. I gotta sit down for 15 minutes to recover. I'm like, holy shit, what happened to my eyes? What happened to my great balance? It's all over the place. I can't imagine what it would be like to have your father flipping you like that over

and over and over and over again. So fast. Again, it was hard for my eyes to adjust to what was going on. It was amazing. Then they had girls that were doing the area... They had their hair? With their hair. You saw it?

I saw it. I've seen it. Have you seen this start to say it? Did you go? It is the one I've seen. Oh, you did? Did you see the one where they put the teeth? Yes.

Guess let me explain to the listener. Two girls doing aerial acrobatics, but they are attached to the rope on their, by their hair, by their fucking hair. And nothing else. I don't have hair in it hurt me. The audience was a gas. They were a gasp.

Then at one point, they take a metal chain, a very small metal chain. I'm saying probably a foot. And on each side of the metal chain is a bite. Yeah, so something you would put in your mouth, you know, like a nighttime retainer, but obviously much more strong. So she puts this in her mouth, and the other girl puts it in her mouth,

and they get lifted up in the air, they're both hanging on by their mouth, basically. I mean, one girl's got her knees in the aerial thing, and then the other girl's just hanging there by her mouth. So we're watching the performance and I start to notice that the girl who's hanging by her mouth, not by her knees, but by her mouth, is like doing making some hand gesture to the girl up or somewhere. Oh, no.

And quickly they get lower down. And when they get lower down, they go to bow to the audience. Because now the audience is like, oh my god, that was amazing, right? So they get lower down. And when they get lower down, they go to bow to the audience. Because now the audience is like, oh my god, that was amazing, right? So they're all clapping. They go to bow to the audience. And you can see, we are very close to the stage. You can see the girl who was hanging.

Go, holy shit. Oh my god. She mouths those words. Like, I think to herself, but it was clear what she was saying. Everybody was with us. It was like, did you see that? Did you see what she said?

I think she basically lost it. She was about to lose her fall to the ground. So this Cirque du Soleil felt much different than some of the other ones. In the sense that it kinda got side-show Cirquecy, there was a guy who was double-jointed in a way that made me sick to my stomach and the entire audience sick to their stomach.

I could have done without it, to be honest with you. Yeah, some of that contortion is hard to look at. But Cirque de Soleil is so fucking amazing, right? Every time. It's so fucking amazing. But even they only have 2,000 people in that tent. So 5,000 people. Maybe I'm misreading the thing.

Maybe I'm misreading the thing. But that's assuming it's more than 1,000. It was more than I thought it was going to be. I thought it was going to be like Dad's garage. Yeah, like 15 people in there. It's not sitting at a table, laughing at a pro comedy. It's more like the Atlantic station tense, yeah.

Wow, great. Yeah. Well, that was a good fun. It was good fun. It just a walk into it, too. It's just a nice little surprise. I go to the Chick-fil-A this weekend, like with my kids. Yeah. I take them to the one with the playgroundA this weekend, like with my kids.

I take them to the one with the playground. Not as fun as Sturper. No, not as fun as Titz. Sorry. Nothing I do is ever going to be as fun as something that you do. Now, over the last 20 years, not the case. No, it's just true.

So, because you had kids long before I did. Yeah, you had kids only. My kids could be the parents of your kids. How old were you when you had your child? 19. Yeah, 19 and 23. Yeah. My kids could be the parents of your kids. How old were you when you had your child? 19? 19, yeah, yeah, 19, 23. Yeah, but you got it over with early. I'm done.

Yeah, you're done. I'm just beginning with some of my children. I don't even know how many kids I have, let alone what ages they are. Yeah. So I take them to this chick flake. And we're sitting there and we're eating. And there's a window to the parking lot.

Somebody pulls up into the handicap space. It's obviously an old man. He gets out and he is dressed in full Santa robe. You know, I'm talking about a costumey robe. He's got that long Santa hat on. He looks nothing like Santa Claus. The guy is probably 70 pounds shopping wet. I love it.

And he is just it's scaring till December 1st. He really was. What's wrong with Santa? Well, here's what's wrong with Santa. Santa wasn't wearing a shirt under his robe. And his robe was like attached by the belt. So as Santa did more moving around, I was like 90 years old.

As Santa did more moving around, his old man tits started hanging out. Oh no. Nobody wants, and one of my kids is like, Daddy, why didn't Santa put on a shirt? And I'm like, well, even since he goes, it's It's like daddy, why didn't Santa put on a shirt? And I'm like, well, even since he goes. It's a little warm out. Why didn't you say it to put on a shirt?

And the next question was, how did Santa get to go so skinny? I said, ozempic son, ozempic. No cookie still Christmas. No cookie still Christmas. He literally did come into place and scare all the children. Places act. And all he was trying to say, hide all the kids. And they were just like, the fuck are you doing

this? No, that's COVID Christmas Santa. That's not regular Santa. Oh, that's sickly Santa. I got a corn cob for a nose. Come on down to COVID Christmas castle. He just needed some chicken nuggets. I'll say a deed's worse than your children.

Look at that. He's having two hot dogs and a sh's worse than your children. Look at that. He's having two hot dogs and a shitterita from Chili's, a free shitterita with every picture with our COVID Christmas castle. Oh, man, that episode still to this day makes me fucking piss my pants. So one of the few times I've actually thought I've been funny on this show, but he was walking around. He really was scaring the children i can imagine it was it was quite the divide probably what is here for sure and then we watched uh... what

what are we do what else do we do this weekend we watched the george a bold dogs loose you know i told you i'm trying to be a football guys i know that my brothers now i know i've i keep trying to i just i can't i can do basketball i love love baseball. B-ball is awesome. Football for me, especially college, just never been a thing. So I didn't watch until the very end, which was the best part, which was the best part. But you guys watched the dogs. The little is over. Yeah. You know, here's the reality. I only started watching college football so I can actually have a conversation with my brothers

because it's all they seem to talk about during college football season. And I wanted to be part of the gang. I know it's kind of it's kind of a little puppy dog. It's endearing. Yeah, but I want to be interested in what they're interested in. So we can all have a conversation. So I thought if I can just catch a couple minutes of a Saturday game, I don't have to watch all of them. I'm just, yeah, I have some anecdotes.

I'll be able to, I can remember what the color commentator says and then repeat it in conversation. Like, man, George's offensive line really left a lot of holes, didn't they? Yeah, you should watch football like I do. It's a game I play, a gay porn or sports ball. I say, a gay porn, probably. Nine times I did send this stuff, I repeat. People are like, no, that's gay porn.

Yeah, that's gay porn. I heard that on the game. He's going deep. Yeah, I know. So I was watching that game and I made the deadly mistake. And I should remember this about any sporting activity that my brothers liked to watch.

I made the deadly mistake of texting one of them. Oh man, it sucks that George is lost. And they responded watching on DVR. Thanks Brian. Oh no. Thanks Brian. Oh, no. Oh, no, that's their bad. You can't watch a championship game on DVR. That's their bad. But then don't expect that everybody else is doing the same thing. It's already been spoiled. If you really don't want to sports spoiler on your telephone, turn it off. That's what you do. Got to put it in airplane. That's right. Because how is everybody else supposed to know

where you're at in the game? I know. ESPN notified him before you did, I promise you. Oh, I promise this particular brother had ESPN dinging all over the place. He gets those ESPN notifications like, you know, the third ranked lacrosse player in some rink eating college in Washington state, got, you know,

traded to another team. He gets that ESP at that. So guys, I ain't scottable. And I was like, dude, you can't, don't play me. He's like, no, seriously, don't say anything else. And I'm, come on, man. Really? You already know. Yeah, now you know.

What do you want me to do for the cat back in the bag? Can't do that. To the face doesn't go back in the two face. It doesn't. But here's also the side effect of watching at least a few minutes of most of the games this season, because I don't have a lot of time on my hands. If I watch 10 minutes of it, I'm good.

But I happen to watch a good chunk of the championship game. But here is the challenge for me. I get so into things. It's like when I have cereal and cream. I do it for months on it. Yes, it's like a whole binge run. It's a whole binge run, right? Now I'm invested in it.

I have no idea what's going on, but I'm just invested in the outcome. And so I'm literally feeling disappointment. I go to take a shower after the game, and I'm feeling bummed out. And I have to just tell myself, Brian, you don't really give a shit about this. Yeah, you know, this is not what you care about. Why are you pretending like you do? Why are there actual emotions coming out of you? You don't care. not what you care about pretending like you do. Why are there actual emotions coming out of you? You don't care.

What do you care? What I care of the Georgia Voldogs go to the National Championship or not? So many people are so heartbroken and I really, I can't even, I feel bad because I can't even empathize like I just don't understand sports fandom. I enjoy watching sports, but I'm not gonna, I'm not losing sleep over any of it. I do understand sports sports. Forks spandum. Forks spandum.

I'm gonna start a new website. You've heard it here, Lord. Forks spandum.com. That's, that's my kind of sports world. Well, spoil your game every time. George and Bulldogs lost. They don't even start till 330. Well, they lost.

You're welcome. You're welcome. George and Bulldogs don't even for spandes for spandes all your favorite sports completely uneducated we give the most uneducated color commentary in all of sports yeah you know I have that t-shirt that's got a man hitting a home run on it says touch down underneath it oh it does what I wear it at every single, what's the one at the top of the year?

Super ball. Super ball. Oh there you go. That's how much I love football. I do get into baseball though. Baseball for sure. I love baseball. Baseball and March Madness.

Yes, me too. College basketball. College basketball. So much fun. Those kids are playing the, I mean the college football kids are playing the hards out too. I get into college more than I get into this to NFL because I just think the NFL, I don't know, in my opinion, it's not the stakes aren't as high, it's not as interesting.

And I know a lot of people would argue with me about that, but I don't care. I don't care. I don't care. You're on the other side of a radio, of a speaker, what a marketer. But I just, I think the kids who are doing college football, they really have their hearts into it. And you hope they do it, at least. You hope they do.

And there's so many more ex-factors in a college football game than there is in an NFL football game. I don't know, this is like when you're making $35 million a year to throw the football. To go to the gym. Yeah, that's your job. Okay, go do a good job of it. When you're not getting paid 35 million,

sure. But of course, now the college kids, I think, can take endorsements too. Yeah. I think they can because I see those college kids on the subway commercials. They've been taken stuff for years, though, haven't they?

They're not going to scan the wrong. Well, that was the argument. Cars and... I agree with it, too, 100%. Why does the University of Georgia take in a hundred million dollars a year in television and endorsement revenue and not, and they can use the likeness of anybody that plays on the team and in perpetuity and get paid nothing.

How is that fair to anybody? And if it's always going on behind the scenes, then why not? It's like, you know, you shine on it. If you shine a light, the corner nothing's dark anymore. Like, okay, all right, the kid got a car because he did the subway endorsement.

Yeah, we're not mad about it. No, I'm not mad about it. What do I care? Right. Listen, you wanna do a subway endorsement, the worst sandwich shop that's ever existed that literally sells rubber to children? Fine, do it.

You wanna be a subway guy, be a subway guy. Cool with me. Well, if you risk life and limb, they love of your game, go ahead. By the way, this episode sponsored by Subway, five dollar foot longs are no longer a foot or $5. Visit your local Subway for more information. Just don't eat it.

Oh man, we had to stop by a Subway. We were on our way to my father's house. And you have to take some un... Yes. Let's travel, bro. Some places as all there is. So the kids are screaming and yelling. Oh, I'm hungry, I'm hungry.

They're not really hungry. They just wanted their board. They're bored. the kids are screaming and yelling. Oh, I'm hungry, I'm hungry. They're not really hungry, they just wanted it. They're bored. They're bored. But they're screaming and yelling so much that assured and I were like, okay, we'll just pull over to the next place we see. Well, the next place that we see is like 15 miles down the road and it's a gas station with a subway in it, the best kind.

But I gotta be. Right way. I gotta be honest. It was Thanksgiving week. It was the day before Thanksgiving, Wednesday before Thanksgiving. These people in this subway, they didn't have three teeth between all of them.

They could not have been fucking nicer. Yep, that's it. That's it. They were so sweet. They were so lovely. I've even had fast food service like that since I can't remember when. Honestly, they were just lovely.

Oh, I'm not happens. The food is just terrible. It's barely food. It's terrible, Tina. I know. There's so many better options, not anyway. That they just gave up. Subway's like, forget it.

Yeah, go to Firehouse. I mean, it's probably not. Sure, it's Mike's. Jersey, Mike's. I like Firehouse, so, Jimmy John's. Yeah. Although that guy is an interesting character, Jimmy John. He no longer owns Jimmy Johns, but he's an interesting character.

Have you ever seen an interview with Jimmy John? I haven't. I don't like the fact that he kills baby elephants. It's not, that's not my thing. That's terrible. That upsets me. It does upset me too, and I wish he would stop for the sake of the earth and everybody else. It's just not necessarily kill a baby elephant.

As you've not seen the revenge elephants? Yeah, I know. Or the revenge whales or the revenge. That elephants stormed the town and ruined that lady's funeral. I know. So don't kill the elephants. They're coming for you. Elephants are the only other, well, there's a lot of other known creatures that grieve.

But they're the only ones that have like funerals for the dead. That's crazy. They do like ceremony and stuff. Then the way they hand down information to, those elephants will hate that man for generations to come. They will hate that man for generations to come. Take heed Jimmy John. However, he does have an interesting story.

Okay, no, I don't want to spill it. I'm not interested in giving him any more time than he needed. I'm just sharing with you that if you ever get a chance to listen to his story, it's interesting. Everyone comes from somewhere and so, you know, whatever. Okay, let's take our first break.

I have a story for you that I don't think you've ever heard before. Okay. It's about a celebrity, maybe one that not everyone's going to be familiar with, but we'll fill you in. And it's probably the most disturbing celebrity story I have heard in years. That's it, that's huge.

Are you up for it? I am. All right, let's take our first break and we'll be back. That's it, that's that's huge. Are you up for it? I am. All right, let's take our first break and we'll be back Okay, Brian. Shh. Let me give the people what they want our social media handles follow us on Instagram at the commercial break And on TikTok at tcb podcast if like all my hinge dates You are thirsty for more give us a call and leave us a message at 626-ASK-TCB3. Or send us a text, no sexting please, at 855-TCB-8383. And of course, go to tcbpodcast.com to see everything there is to see.

Now let's hear from our sponsors and then the show is going. Hey everybody, want to let you know that this episode is sponsored in part? By Factor. Show us the one. to 60 family members living in my house, shopping for prepping and cooking a nutritious meal. Breakfast, lunch, and dinner, it's a big stress point around here. And since I don't really know how to cook, that stress often falls on other family members. But this holiday season, we're going to try something different. Factor America's number one ready-to-eat meal delivery service can help us fuel up fast for breakfast, lunch, and dinner with Chef Prepared. Dietitian approved ready-to- to eat meals delivered straight to our door. Because factors never froze in meals already in just 2 minutes, all you have to do is

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So head to FactorMeals.com slash commercial break 50 and use the code commercial break 50 to get 50% off. That's code commercial break 50 at Factor Meals.com slash commercial break 50 and get 50% off. We also want to thank factor for being a sponsor of the commercial break All right, you're ready for the most disturbing celebrity story? I'm bracing myself in years, if not ever. Okay, let's do this. Okay, let me give a little backstory here for the kids out there. We probably have no idea what I'm talking about. The mamas and the poppas in the 50s and 60s were a rock and roll band.

And they had some very famous people musicians at the time that came out of the mamas in the past. Mama Cass. Mama Cass, the Wilson's, who then became the Wilson sisters, you might remember from movies like Wilson Phillips, like Bridesmaids and you know. Well, someday I'm never going to find a van and a turn, you're mine. That's right. That's all for one more day.

All right. Hold on for one more day. Those are the, some of those are the children of members of the mamas and the poppas. So the mamas and the poppas, this 50, 60s, like early hippie bands, like starting to take that turn, they kind of took that ride with the culture. Oh yeah, with like Fleetwood Mac and yeah.

Yeah, absolutely. They had a slew of records and hits and singles and all this. that ride with the culture. Oh, yeah. With like Fleetwood Mac and yeah. Yeah, absolutely. They had a slew of records and hits and singles and all this. Okay. John Phillips was one of the lead writers and singers in the Mamas and the Poppas. Okay. John Phillips was known to be a troubled human being. He had children.

He had drug addiction, all the rock and roll, just a rock and roll story through and through. But recently, it came to light that his daughter, Mackenzie Phillips, who was not part of Wilson Church, she was a TV actress on a show called One Day at a Time, I think is what it was. I think it was One Day at a Time. It's a show back from the early 80s, late 70s, early 80s. It was a popular show. I haven't seen it, but she was an actress in this television show.

Mackenzie Phillips recently wrote a memoir called High on Life. I think is what it's called or too high on arrival. High on arrival. High on arrival, too high on arrival. High on arrival, it's a memoir. And in that memoir, she explains that at 19 years old on the day of her wedding, her father

had non-consensual sex with her. John Phillips. But now wait, this is not the crazy part because this is a story that in and of itself is so fucked up as part of your imagined, right? That you would have non-consensual sex with your own daughter. Ever.

But the next part is just as equally disturbing. Is that for the next 10 years, they had consensual sex over and over and over again. They had a relationship. Mackenzie Phillips and her father, John Phillips. I don't even know what to say to that i i'm i i say it out loud i learned this information a week ago and i'm still having a hard time wrapping my head around it why did she put this on her book why did she want to get this story out according to her because she wanted to share

the dark the the dark side of john philips but she also wanted people to know that it's not as black and white as one would imagine. That John was a wonderful, sweet man, that fathered her in a way that she felt was very loving. But remember, this is... He used that term loosely. I know. And this non-consensual sex happened when she was 19 years old. For the first time.

For the first time. But that she had a wonderful relationship with him otherwise. And then she was so in love with her father that she continued that relationship for 10 years consensually. Now she fell in love after he raped her. I don't know. Tina, I don't know. I'd rather use the word non-concentral sex. I got you. Just for a lot of different reasons, but I don't want to trigger anybody. Right. And so, but here's the other thing. of different reasons, but I don't want to trigger anybody, right? And so, but here's the other thing. Is it really consensual when it starts off non-consensual?

I could ever be. Don't know. I can't be when it's a position of power and authority, and that's your father. That's your fucking father. It's your fucking father. You are a trainer entire life to do what your parents say. That's right.

So how could it ever be a consensual relationship? I don't think so. I don't think so either. I don't think so. I think when you're the parent of a child, first of all, it to me, this is unfathomable. Yes. But let's assume, right, that in some world this exists,

it's really hard for me to wrap my head around. Was she raised in the home with him? I think so, yeah. I mean, I don't know because it's just a blur, by the way. It's just a blurb. She doesn't go, I don't think she goes in great detail about it because all the articles I've read say she just shares this kind of two lines of information

to paragraph information. Oh, that's kind of rude. Yeah, it's kind of rude. Like if you're gonna write a memoir, just get it all out there. Yeah, let me read all about it. So, I go on the internet and I'm like, I wonder exactly how often this happens.

I know it happens a lot. A lot. But most of the stories I've heard have been, we met on Tinder, I never knew my dad. I never knew my dad. Yes, something like that. And that's still while it's highly disturbing. Or brother and step-sister, or

make some little more sense. Cousins. Then being raised in the home. Because listen, I was in love with my dad when I was a little girl. Yeah. There was no line ever. You know what I'm saying?

Like I get that feeling of loving your parent, but that is, that's too much. It's beyond measure. It's just like, I don't even, I can't even comprehend. Especially raised in Western America, like Western culture. Okay, so this is what I do I go and I do some research and I remember reminded of a statistic that Chrissy and I learned when we did the cousin fucker episode remember the cousin fuckers so there's a

Couple in Utah who has been literally yelling and screaming from the top of their lungs about their relationship as first cousins. And they're fighting the state to be able to be married and all this other stuff is illegal. It's illegal in some states, but not all states to marry your first blood cousin, right? So I read the following statistic and this is going to blow your way. 33% of people pulled internationally across the earth in a long range and a long long term study. 33% of people said that they had had some kind of consensual relationship with a first cousin or closer when it comes to sex. 33% say they have made out, they've had some kind of physical sexual relationship

with a blood relative, meaning first cousin or closer. I can say that I know for a fact, my background is in sociology We study a lot about you know children and family units and all that it is very normal for children's first sexual Experiences to be with somebody in the household a step sibling a sibling a cousin something like that is very normal and not considered Mala station or inappropriate as long as there's not a five-year age gap But are you suggesting that this is adults? very normal and not considered molestation or inappropriate as long as there's not a five-year age gap.

But are you suggesting that this is adults saying they've had our consensual relationship because if you're under age, I don't know that that's consensual, so I don't know how I believe. I don't know. I didn't read the study like that. Like it didn't give that information that I recall, right? No age grading. No age.

There was no age grading. I mean, I'm just like 33% still pretty high. That's a fucking shitload of. And first cousin. That's three out of every 10 people that were sitting with you that have had, and I get it like, okay, you're with your cousins and I don't know, it's touching, weirdness, exploring,

whatever's going on. Curiosity. Curiosity. I think I told this story. We used to have this family that we called Uncle this aunt that cousin this cousin that totally normal, but they weren't Cousins of ours right nor were they aunts and uncles, but we didn't really recognize that at our young age sure, right and the girl in the family the opposite family and the girl in the family, the opposite family, and I had like a little 10 year old crush, right?

9, 10 year old crush. We all go on vacation one time, and I don't know how this happens, but we end up in a closet kissing, okay? Normal. It's totally normal. Right, and they, one of the parents catches a catch is on to what's going on,

and we get a tongue lashing of epic proportions. Sure. You never kiss your cousin, you can't do that. That's not allowed. You never, never, ever, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Well, three years later, I realized that they are not my cousin there, just friends of my parents. And, but I remember like having this sense of how long this was.

You don't do this, you can't, right? Yeah. But I have very attractive cousins. I will tell you something. I got like 36 cousins and at least two of them, I find to be attractive people. Would I ever be physical with them? No, I wouldn't because I gotta tell them.

Maybe you know they were your cousin, but yeah, you got that shaming dog. I got that shaming. I got the Catholic guilt going on there. Yeah, and I had cousins getting trouble for peaking in on me and my girl cousins. It's just a curiosity thing, and I don cousins getting trouble for peaking in on me and my girl cousins. It's just a curiosity thing, and I don't think that counts as consensual relations.

Do you know that? It seems unfair. Do you know that I know a woman whose parents would not even let them spend the night at a cousin's house? I believe it. They were so protective of their daughter that they would not even let them spend the night at a cousin's house. I believe it. Yeah, they were so protective of their daughter that they would not even let them spend the night at a cousin's house.

They were like, nope, nope, nope. How was your, what is your feeling on spend the nights? Did you allow them? I did, but I raised my kids with a very close friend of mine who had children the same age. And she was aunts, and I was aunts, and we were definitely not sisters. Yeah, yeah.

Our kids are cousins. They still feel like they're cousins today, they're grown. So in those situations I did, but I had to know both parents. Okay. Until my children were probably in high school, I had to know both parents. And so I used to host like, Hey, come over. Let's get to know each other. Yeah, yeah. We're having a sleep over party for my daughter's birthday, but I'd like to know you before your kid comes smart. So I used to host like, like, girlfriend's parents. I want me to take you to coffee before I come over tonight. Back over to the house, sit on my bed, feel it's warm and comfy.

So yeah, I was funny about that. If I didn't know the adults in the home. I think I'm out. I think I'm out on the, to spend the night. Just not. I just think I'm not. I've seen so much. One day you're going to want to break.

One day I will want to break. One day I will wanna break. Like when there's 16 and they could drive themselves to and fro, they can get out of a situation just as quickly as I got into it. Family, of course, but adults I didn't know. Yeah, I think if there was like, you know, there's not a lot of cousins, but if there was a cousin or something,

I would be like, okay, all right, I guess, for one night. But I just have read so many, this is the situation where parenting is changing so quickly. Yes. And now, generally, it's just spend the nights are not a thing that many parents think are okay. My aunt had let her daughter, my cousin, she'd never had, she's still never had one, she's just a scrum.

You know what I'm saying? Spend the nights. None. None whatsoever. Huh. But, I mean, you're gonna have some friends that you're gonna consider family at some point. The kids, you know, and you're gonna,

you're gonna attack team. We traded popsicles. Yeah, one popsicle stick. We traded popsicle sticks. One popsicle stick per hour per kid. Next time you're up and you just gathered your popsicle sticks and traded, but it was a trusted group of, you know, mom's groups

and kids from the daycare, people you just know. Yeah, you build these relationships and you get a little more comfortable, but generally it is a hard no. Yeah. And then what are you doing that's like, I don't know, going back to McKenzie Phillips is like, what do you do when it's the parent in the home? Yeah, now what do you do? So fucking twisted.

It's too much. So fucking twisted. Is she still married to the man that she married that day? No, I don't think so. I can't imagine she would be. She had a 10-year relationship with her dad. Oh, God. It turns my stomach. It's just like hearing, saying those words out loud.

I find it to be rather disturbing. Yeah. Yeah. What happened? Why'd they break up? Sorry. I was so, so, know, this communication issues. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know.

I don't want to know quite frankly. What do I do? Well, I've been dead for a long time. I want to know. Well, I don't know. She's not giving, she's not spilling all the tea. She's just spilling some of the tea. But reason number one, I will never read this or even listen to it on an audio, but it sounds

like there's no information. She's just dropping bombs and running away. Yeah. Yeah, that's not okay. Well, I mean, when something like that happens to you, maybe it's just- Just don't put it in the book. I agree with you.

Keep it to your therapist. Yeah, there's just some stuff that maybe we don't want to- Unless you want to flesh it out. Yeah, see, that's what I, that's sometimes why I have hard time with like the celebrity in my Mars and stuff. It's the drip, drip, drip, leak information before's what I, that's sometimes I, that's why I have hard time with like the celebrity memoirs and stuff. Yeah. It's the, they, drip, drip, drip leak information before it comes out, right?

All the good stuff is already in the plot. Yeah, it's the trailer movie. It's the trailer movie. It's the trailer movie. Yeah. It's the trailer movie. Now trailers to the movie basically just give you the whole plot and ending in the trailer movie.

You know, you're not going to come see it anyway. You're not going to come see it anyway. Here, please watch it on Netflix when it's available. And sometimes these celebrity memoirs are just like that. The drip, drip, drip, drip, drip, drip, drip, drip. And then you already know all the good information and it's not all that good anyway. It's like, who's had Jay to pink it Smith

and she's running around? Yeah, I heard some nonsense about that too, but I didn't read that. And then I feel like it's another one. They're like drop bomb. And then everyone goes, oh my God. And then you're like, wait. You're just not making any more money

in your acting career, so you just drop a book. I don't know. Stir up some internet. Yeah, listen, I don't know, Jada. I'm sure she's a lovely human being. I watched her on that Drew Barrymore show, and I just couldn't not. Drew shows pretty good.

Drew shows good, but Drew and her were like, I don't just gushing all over each other and then something about something. It's a Drew asks her like like, I just gushing all over each other and then something about something. And Drew asks her like, you know, what do you think, why do you think Will slapped Chris at the Oscars, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, and she's like, I'm a big believer that you gotta take responsibility for your own actions.

So I don't wanna talk about that. And it's like, come on. Wait a minute. This is the line she's been telling. That's your husband. You don't have to apologize for your husband. Sure. I get that.

And you are not responsible for his actions. I absolutely understand that. Totally agree. But do you have any other opinion besides, I did your husband. Do you have any other opinion besides, it was him, not me? Like no one's blaming you,

but could you like pontificate just a little bit? Help us understand. Help us understand, because Will's not doing it. I just saw that Will was like in Saudi Arabia with Johnny Depp They've often relegated to Saudi Arabia. Yes. What that's some movie like now this Saudi Arabians put it's either Saudi Arabia or Qatar I can't remember don't you never get good information on this show so don't take it to the bank But they're over somewhere and it's the film festival.

That's obviously someone just throwing billions of dollars at a film festival to get famous people over there. Fine, you've got the money, pay for it, I guess. It's like that golf, that live golf. They just pay everybody a bunch of money to come play shitty golf somewhere. So, shitty golf on the internet, nonetheless, it doesn't even have a TV channel.

So, I see that in this particular film festival, there's two really famous people. It's Will Smith and Johnny Depp and they're like hanging out high five and hugging each other. We like it. Yeah. We're both canceled. Hey, it's coming on. Neither of us. We're sent to the desert.

Neither of us will get another Academy Award. We're sent to the desert. But the pay is great and the view is wonderful. That's all I gotta say. Wow. All right, we're gonna take our second break and then we're gonna get into a 90s phenomenon that I've still have a hard time understanding myself. A 90s musical phenomenon, actually wasn't a phenomenon, it was a complete failure.

But this weird period of time when one of the most famous musicians on Earth at that moment went, I don't know, more weird celebrity. More weird celebrity, but it's a weird celebrity bullshit episode of the commercial break. And let's take that break. We'll listen to some sponsors, so we'll be back. Look, I know you guys are getting really sick of me, but that is too bad. It's my job!

Now, go to tcbpodcast.com for all of our audio and video content and get your little booty over to youtube.com slash the commercial break for fully edited video episodes. Want a chat? Leave us a voicemail at 626-ask-tcb3. To embarrass for your voice to be on the show, we understand Texas instead at 855-TCB-8383. Can't even do that. No worries. Just follow us on TikTok at TCB Podcast and on Instagram at the commercial break.

And if you can't even be seen doing that, just listen to these sponsors and let's get back to the show. listen to these sponsors and let taking straight back to the race. I would argue, besides him and Billy Ray Cyrus, who I think was the first with way down, y'all never ended up with Billy Ray. He was achy, breaky, hard. Oh, thank you, breaky, hard.

You're talking about any Alabama's, the band, I think. Oh my God, I didn't know you're a country fan, I? My dad was a Lebanese cowboy. I don't know if you know this about me, but. I think I do remember this. You know that my first job behind the microphone was in a classic country radio station called 967 The Legend. So I think the show called...

Oh, I remember the legend. Yeah, late night on The Legend. Where the director of the station, the head programmer of the entire cluster, like 28 stations or something like that. I begged and begged and begged for a year to finally put me on the radio at this, what they call a small stick station, which means the signal reaches about three miles in every radius, right? You can't hear it unless it's a cloudy night.

And it's 3am. You can't hear it. Only some certain segment of South Atlantic could hear this. But I begged and I begged. What I really wanted to do was be on the rock station, but that was never gonna happen, because there was big separation between the business units and the creative units upstairs. So finally, I brought him a beer one day, and I'm like, listen, dude, please put me on the radio. I just wanted a couple minutes.

Let me get some practice time. He said, listen, fan, you be on the radio. But there's two things, he said, listen, fine, you be on the radio. But there's two things, he said three things that I need to make sure you understand. Number one, if this ever affects your job downstairs, meaning the business office, if this ever affects your job downstairs, I'll have you fired personally myself. Okay, fair enough. Number two, I'm going to put you on 96,7 the legend from 1 a.m. to 3 a.m. in the morning

and ain't no one gonna hear you. I said sold. Sold. I never want more than 30 seconds of talk ever. And I was like, okay, got it. In and out of songs, Brian, in and out of songs. Hit the post and get out. Tell the weather, get out.

Tell them the traffic and get out. I'm like, is there gonna be traffic at one to three in the morning in South Atlanta? So I was like, okay, I got it. Time, weather, traffic, get out. Fine. What ended up happening is I would brought friends up there and I got a co-host and I finally expanded it.

I was doing 30 minutes of talking hour. And no one noticed. This went on for like nine months and no one noticed. I was almost doing a full hour of talk out of the hour. So I was doing three hours and I was almost doing two hours of talk and that three hours. It was amazing. It was amazing. But anyway, this classic country station, the only way that I knew any of these old crewners, these country crewners was because I had to talking and out of the songs, right?

So I would argue that Garth Brooks is probably one of the first crossover country artists. Do you think? Cross over into pop, into the mainstream. Yeah, for sure. Yeah, okay. So Garth Brooks was... He paved the way, kind of. He paved the way.

He was as big as it could get. He was, he was the country Michael Jackson. And many, many, many people who never even considered listening. You gotta remember that back before Garth and Billy Ray Cyrus and Alabama, you know, some of these like Kenny Rogers do it with Dolly Parton. Before any of this, you either listened to country music. Yeah, it was Hank Williams. Yes.

It's a lot like dubstep, right? It's not mainstream, you don't hear it on the radio. Right. And you didn't hear country songs on any mainstream radio station unless it was country, and there were only a few of those. Only. Until the 90s, right? That's right, until the 90s.

And then Garth just blows up in the 90s. He's selling out 100,000 seed of stadiums down in Brazil. I mean, the guy is all over the place. And now he's still doing the same thing, by the way, to this day. He's still selling out these huge arenas. I think he just finished a tour. For whatever reason, at some point, let me get the facts right on this. I'm just going to pull up the Wikipedia here.

In 1999, Garth decided that he needed to do something to shake up his musical career and he wanted to be a phantom singer. He was going to create like the masked singer. Yes, exactly. Exactly. He was going. Rather than put a big dick costume on top of your head that's right is it gonna grow your hair on one of those flavor savers under your lip the tide had turned garth was no longer as popular as he once was well he had all the scandals with

the women in all the uh... that's true that always happens you fell out of favor so he per he created a persona called Chris Gaines. Chris Gaines was going to be an alternative rocker, and he was gonna put out albums, he was gonna have a movie, he was gonna have a television show, they're gonna make documentaries about him.

He actually hosted Saturday Night Live as Chris Gaines. I don't know if you know this. I don't remember very little about this era of Garth's apparently prolific career. I didn't know if you know this. I don't remember. I remember very little about this era of a guards apparently prolific career. I didn't know he was still touring. Yeah, he's still touring. So what happened to Chris? He was an epic failure. It was an epic flop because no one could understand why. We know it's you. Yeah, we know it's you. We always knew. Yeah. There was never a secret that it was Garth Brooks as Christopher Gaines. And it was just weird, rather than wear these big 10 gallon hats

and run around with boots on. He could have just changed his look. He could have Frankie beat himself. He could have Frankie beat himself. If only Frankie B was there to advise Garth Brooks, no one would have cared. But he grows his hair out emo. He looks like an emo rocker is what he looks like.

If you want to check it out, you're YouTube.com slash the commercial break. We'll put some clips up there. The weirdest thing that came out of this was a VH1 behind the music, which was a show that VH1 used to produce where they would take an hour and focus on the history and story of one band or artist. They don't do it anymore, but it was a great show. Because there's music, documentaries. Yeah.

And they always had some good juicy gossip that you never had before so wait They made one of these for a fake for a fake Carried that's right and I found it all in line of course you did of course I did So without further ado, I was trolling on the internet as you do like I do like Tina. And I found the Chris Gaines, VH1, behind the music. This is exciting. It's an hour long. We don't have time to go through all of it. But I think the beginning should just give you a taste

of what the rest of it is like. Well, I'll say CT. Remember, the little Tasty-Tasty. Just a Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee-Tee- Did it just to chase you I just need a little tape I have to remind you that this is an hour fucking long about a fake man about a man who never existed I can't believe this actually happened. This is crazy. All right, here we go Your memories come flooding back the second that you see him. He's wearing all black, a three-piece suit, not a three-piece suit, but a suit, a black suit with a black turtle. Why is it a Roy Orbison? It looks like an emo Roy Orbison, like a dashboard confessional. That's smashed up

with a Roy Orbison. He was a rocker who liked fast cars and even faster women. Sex. That's the greatest thing about being a musician. That's a show grinding women. I haven't it. Hang on. I didn't know this part.

He like this guy has his own backstory. He's got his own backstory. He made up a backstory about him having a sex addiction. And we were supposed to believe that you, Garth? Yes. It's clearly Garth? Yes, OK. It's clearly, Garth. What they do is they just point the camera at the side of his face, hoping you won't get a shot.

I'm trying not to cry. We're going to go all the time. I'm going to go all the time. His passion for music was rivaled by only one thing. I've gone to his hotel room on occasion, and there have been more women there than I would count on one hand but is it also he actually got his manager on the one

you know that's five i would go up to the hotel room and there were more girls and i could count on one finger more than two fiction to sex finally forced Chris Gaines to seek help. You got to go to the studio. And the craziest part is they have to take all of these like back, they have to film all of this b-roll footage. No, that was just pictures of Axel Rez, I thought. Oh is it? Maybe they did that. Fuck you, VH1.

Fuck you. For buying into this crap. Do you think this is when VH1 behind fuck you, for vying into this crap. Do you think this is when VH1 behind the music jumped the ship officially? No, he isn't. It's my brother in the last episode. Fortunately, he did get help because if he didn't, he was headed on a path that was just destructive. Chris Gaines' solo career took him to the top of the charts, then his manager took him to the cleaners. I turned Chris Gaines from a nobody

into a superstar. And then I stole all his money. And he got his bricks to that. Yeah. He's got the most tragic backstory. Sex addicted. He was going to a dark place. It's so funny that that's what he went to.

Like that's what he wanted the story to be. That's what he wanted the story to be. Was he having like sell little sex? Yeah, because wasn't he like really addicted to sex and like isn't that too like mimicking his story? Well, he cheered on his wife with Trisha Euler. Trisha Euler, and now they're married, aren't they? They got married.

I don't know if they're still married. I think they are still married. You know, if you cheat on someone, did she marry Garth or Chris? I imagine she married both of them. This is probably an exciting bedroom. Three sums every night. Every single night.

My husband and his husband are personality. That's right. I'm gonna pop one off as Garth and then I'm gonna be back as Chris. Give me 15 to 20 minutes and one of those blue pills I'll be back as Chris. Now you should know that they actually put out, I think, two albums as Chris. Yeah. Two. Did he just make it in Country Mealant? Man, I really should have gone the other way with this.

I think he just never made that full step into mainstream success. I think he was always considered a country either with, even though he had mainstream hits. Yeah. And I think, yeah, I think in some way, shape or form, he just wanted validity as a mainstream artist. But what a sad side. He sold over a hundred million albums. Yeah, what more do you need? What more do you need? You can't be happy with being though a world's most popular country artist. You have to probably still today. I mean, I don't know who could give him a run for his money. I don't know. I don't know. And keep up with it. I mean, Taylor Swift was a country artist at one point. Maybe

you were cheated by the Chennai Twain did both. Yeah. Blake Shel, and keep up with it. I mean, Taylor Swift was a country artist at one point. Maybe she did both. Shania Twain did both. Blake Shelton, he's puke here, pretty big, but I don't know. I mean, Jimmy Buffett. Yeah, Jimmy, he's here, Jimmy on. On country radio, still. They also like pot with Willie, so I think that's like the.

Well, Willie is the geniuses. That's how you get in, yeah, straight. His world tours were renowned for their outrageous antics. I remember going over to Chris's house, he was packing and he was packing a chainsaw and a back. There was a chainsaw on tour, yes, there was. Well, is that the hardest thing you can come up with? A chainsaw. Not a noosey or a small woman. Just in case I need to take a few trees down. Oh my god. And just how he's holds his head when he's Chris Gaines. He holds his bangs over his face. Yeah. This is so

1999. When he lost his best friend, he almost lost his way. Have they lied about somebody dying? Yeah, they lied about somebody dying. And of course, they had to make the friend a black guy. Of course. Of course. Right? Because that's more rock and roll. Yeah, it's more rock and roll. Let you know that Garza nice guy. You he welcomes all people What I know they were close I'm like a Billy and on that Billy Joel show's up for this. I didn't even know this Billy Joel shows up in this Billy Joel bought into this bullshit. No way. No way what they pay him. I think they probably edited him He's talking about somebody else. Yeah, I don't want to believe Billy was a part of it. No way Oh the PLL

Christmas base was horribly disfigured in a spectacular car crash You live with your face for 25 years and they just have a totally reshaped. It's not an easy thing. He doesn't even have any scars on his face. They put like a brown paper bag over the guy in the wheelchair. I know. They show a picture like a b-roll picture of him in black and white with a paper bag over the guy in the wheelchair. I know, they show a picture, like a B-roll picture of him in black and white with a paper bag over. Poorly disfigured.

That's why you look like earthbrook. That was the Reconstiff. That's why you got all that plastic surgery as with earthbrook. Get along with. But he came back to fight another day. I just can't believe they did this for a whole hour. That was country music. That was definitely country music. There's nothing emo or rock and roll about any of the music they've played so far.

You know what? I'm the king now. You're going to answer to me. Now, Rock's Mystery Man revealed behind the life of Chris Gaines. Oh my god, he's got eye shadow on. What are we going to do? I mean, honestly. This guy is so weird.

Yeah, you're not Morrissey. His solo albums have sold more than 50 million copies. Where? Where have they sold 50-motor copies? I don't even think they sold fifty motor copies i don't even think they sold ten copies his concerts of pack the rena's around the world his famous singles have dominated the charts for nearly two decades that's not your semisingle.

In that country again. Yeah, Chris Gaines is one of rock and roll's most enigmatic figures. There's this sort of air of mystery. And I often wonder, did he create it or Or is it really a natural part of his personality? I always wonder, did he create it or did he create it for more money? I always wondered. From his solo debut in 1989, Chris Gaines has been hell-bent on leaving his mark on rock and roll. You know, I'm wondering if that guy Chris Angel actually took his persona from Chris Gaines because I'm seeing a lot of similarities.

This right here definitely. That looks like Chris Aido. Yeah, definitely shows us. Mine fake. One's Chris decided to become a fellow. Is he in spandex there? He's in the spandex there. Black and white.

Black and white spandex. He was totally 100% committed. He went after that with such fury that nothing was going to stop him until he became the biggest artist in the world. One of the traits I got from my father was success is only success if it comes again. Maybe it! Success is only success if it comes again. I have faith in every bedroom encounter I've ever had. That's the end.

Chris Gaines was born in Brisbane, Australia in 1967 into a family of overachievers. His mother, Caroline, was a member of the Australian Olympic swim team. Chris' father, Jean, was her coach. When Chris was five, his family... Oh, that's not weird. That's not weird. Or she... Or his mom married his coach. I just can't believe how deep they go into this lie, into this whole story.

Yeah, what? Yeah. Yeah. I mean, I get like as creatively, if you're like making a movie, a creative movie, and you're telling a story, I get it. But Garth actually tried to pass off as Chris Gaines. He actually tried to go on tour, I think, as Chris Gaines. I think he did.

Did he? I think he did. What's worse is you can't just tell the people, this is the number one selling rock artists of all time when you've never heard of them. That's right. And let me give you a little backstory on the Wikipedia. 1999, Brooks and his production company Red Stroke's Entertainment with Paramount Pictures began develop a film in which Brooks would star. The, was to have revolved around Chris Gaines, a fictional rock singer and emotionally conflicted with emotionally convicted life as a musician and the public eye.

To create buzz for the project, Brooks took on the identity of Gaines in 1999. And he put out an album called Garth Brooks in the life of Chris Gaines, which was intended as a pre-soundtrack, pre-soundtrack, pre-soundtrack to the film. Wow.

To promote the album's release, Brooks appeared as Gaines in television mockumentary for VH1. This seems very much not like a mockumentary, but they're trying to sell it. And was the musical guest on Saturday Night Live. In March 2021, Brooks announced that the life of Chris Gaines was to be released on multiple platforms, including digital and final 20 years. 20 years. Yes, he had one single that went billboard 100 as a top 40 single in lost in you, the

first single from the music. He didn't, I don't think he went on tour. And the discography is one. It is a fun. Garth Brooks in the life of Christopher Gades. Let's listen to two more minutes of this. From Australia to this modest house in a quiet suburb of Los Angeles,

it's a great place to grow up. The weather was fabulous. The girls gorgeous. By the time Chris reached adolescence, Gene Gaines made it clear he wanted his son to follow in his footsteps. My father wanted me to... To be a swimmin' coach! That's of course, I think everybody in my family wanted me to swim. He was just so thrilled that his son was going to be a great athlete.

If it was athletics, he could pull me over and explain everything to me, face to face, as far as anything other than athletics. It was just not a gift that my father possessed. I mean, she must have said he loved Chris at some point, but I don't remember it. By the time. Of course, the dad that doesn't love you, the mom that's older supportive, it's a terrible, terrible, terrible idea. Here's a little advice to all the little up-and-coming rock stars out there. And this reminds me, you know, kiss is on tour right now. Oh.

They didn't have to do that. They didn't have to do that. And now they're putting these avatars together. Did you hear this? No. So at the last concert concert at their last show, they run this promotional video. It's like a minute and a half long.

It's not even worth listening to. And they explain that kiss will live on, even though they will not be playing live shows together anymore, kiss will live on as they have spent the last year developing avatars that will go on tour on their behalf. Like holograms? Holograms.

We'll two pop tour with them. Yeah, I don't, Abba. Yeah, Abba did a successful tour with the holograms. Abba, I can understand. Kiss, I'm just okay. I've never been a kiss fan. Me neither. I don't knock the kiss fans.

I just never like the music. I missed it. I don't, yeah. I missed it. I don't understand all the grandiosity. Me neither. I don't care about the makeup. Yeah, the pageantry, the show, the lights, the fireworks.

I understand why some people like it. I understand why people like Rush also. Sure. But it's just not my thing. Neither. I just can't get into it. Me and I don't know why. You know what?

Good for them. Gene Simmons always looking to make a book. Good old Gene. Never let that tongue sleep for an hour. Sleeper celebrity is brought to you by TCB. Yeah, speaking of personas. So weird. Did you ever go to a kiss show? No.

The closest I got to ever liking kiss was Detroit Rock City City the movie, which I thought was a good movie. Sure. Even though it's filled with Kiss music and the whole goal is for this kid to get to the Detroit, so you can see Kiss. I just never felt... I don't even think... No connection for me. I can't even think of one song that I really like. No.

Can you? No. None of them. It's none of my playlists. No. I've never heard a Kiss album. I've never had it on a playlist. That's so weird me either. I know. Not my playlists. No. I've never heard a kiss album. I've never had it on a playlist. That's somewhere me either.

I know. Not on an iTunes. No. Nothing. Never. I- just like Chris Gaines. I like the Kiss song by Prince. Okay.

The Kiss song by Prince I can get it into. And by the way, nothing compares to you, the one that the family put out, the version of Prince singing nothing compares to you, with that woman I can't remember her name right now. Something, if something, Rosie, something. Rosie Gaines. Rosie Gaines?

Yeah. Is that her name? Yeah, I think it is. I think you're right. Rosie Gaines singing with Prince, nothing compares to you. That's so beautiful. Is un-fucking believable. It's a revelation.

Go listen to it. Anyway, you know what you can do? You know what else you can do? TCBpodcast.com. That's where you go. You find out more information about the show. All the video, all the audio, everything we've ever known is right there at the website. If you want your free piggy fronting sticker, hit the contact us button, the drop down menu

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Okay, I guess that's all I can do for today, Tina. That's a lot for one day, I think we did a lot. But thank you for joining me in the chair again. Anytime. I appreciate it, I do love's all I can do for today Tina. That's a lot for one day I think we did a lot. But thank you for joining me in the chair again. And I appreciate it. And I appreciate it. I do love you. I love you. I say best to you. Best to you.

And best to you out there in the podcast universe. Until next time. Tina and I always say. We do say and we must say. Good bye. Bye. I'm gonna play a game with you. I'm gonna play a game with you. I'm gonna play a game with you. I'm gonna play a game with you. I'm gonna play a game with you.

I'm gonna play a game with you. I'm gonna play a game with you. I'm gonna play a game with you. I'm gonna play a game with you. I'm gonna play a game with you. I'm gonna play a game with you. I'm gonna play a game with you. I'm gonna play a game with you. I'm gonna play a game with you. That's my opinion!