The Commercial Break - Questions Remain...
Episode Date: August 7, 2024Episode #578: Will we ever get answers to our questions? Maybe the magic hydrocodones will help! Bryan & Krissy get into The Sphere, drugs in Vegas, Roast rules, and TLC. Songs of the summer POV Gra...teful Dead at the Sphere U2, Phish, Grateful Dead, The Eagles, and EDM? Egg shaped seats Getting weed in Vegas Bryan & Krissy’s trip to Bonnaroo Forgetting Ozzy Osbourne Brainstorming flops Brian Moses & RBL Weekly Send us your roasts 212.433.3822 FUCK CANCER Roast rules A great diet: salsa and cupcakes Bryan is a wimp Questions remain A serious TLC moment Be nice to people! Bad romance passages Chapelle Ronan? Oh no… Text us or leave us a voicemail: +1 (212) 433-3TCB FOLLOW US: INSTAGRAM:  https://www.instagram.com/thecommercialbreak/ https://www.instagram.com/bryanwgreen/ https://www.instagram.com/tcbkrissy/ YOUTUBE: https://www.youtube.com/thecommercialbreak TIKTOK: https://www.tiktok.com/@tcbpodcast Visit our website: https://tcbpodcast.com/ CREDITS: Executive Producer: Bryan Green Hosts: Bryan Green & Krissy Hoadley Producer: Astrid B. Green Producer & Audio Editor: Christina Archer Christina’s Podcast: Apple Podcasts & Spotify To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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Hope you're feeling a little chooky today.
I know I am.
Thank you very much.
Whenever I press the aliens button, you know we're on fire.
They just let you know.
That's when I get really excited.
I'm like, let's get the aliens in there. I've had too much coffee. Let I press the aliens button, you know we're on fire. Just to let you know, that's when I get really excited.
I'm like, let's get the aliens in there.
I've had too much coffee.
Let's get the aliens in there.
I've had too much coffee and I'm mad about something.
Let's get aliens in there.
Have you been keeping up with the musical trends
of the summer?
Somewhat.
By listening to a lot of widespread panic?
No, I've been really listening to that Charlie XCX.
Okay, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
Now you gotta tell everybody,
you are gonna go see the Grateful Dead at the Sphere,
which I know I'm not just hitting you
over the head with this right now,
but you are gonna go and see that fucking Grateful Dead.
Well, you're thinking about it.
You are thinking about it.
You should go do it.
Wow, you gotta give us a full report.
I want video and audio.
I wanna see everything.
Can you please just keep your,
can you get one of those,
you know, people like ride roller coasters
with the big, they have like a chest thing
and their phone is in the chest thing
and then they just, you know, point a POV camera.
Could you do a POV for us?
I think so.
We can just edit out all the drugs and alcohol,
but you just, you know, just do the POV
and then we can watch it together.
Yeah, I'm really excited to see this thing.
I mean, by all accounts, it's amazing.
It looks really, I mean, anything I've seen
on the socials looks incredible.
When they first started talking about this fear,
which was a decade ago.
When they-
Because it's the guy that's the Madison Square Garden, right?
The MSG, yeah, he owns the MSG.
And this.
Yeah, and then he owns professional sports teams of some version.
Okay.
I don't know.
But he had this idea a decade ago.
He said, I want to build the world's most advanced audio theater that breaks walls and
barriers and I want bands to be able to play in there and it's just going to be the most
amazing entertaining experience because he's obviously a fan of music.
He bought MSG and a lot of other theaters
or entertainment complex that went with MSG.
And he put a lot of money into that.
And he's done very well for himself,
or is doing very, I guess he's doing very well for himself.
I don't know in this sphere.
And lots of people said, not possible.
You're gonna, and then he,
I don't know if it was him or the architect
that came up with like this round theater idea. Okay, not possible. You're going to bid. And then he, I don't know if it was him or the architect that came up with like this round theater idea. Okay. All right. Well there's 360 degree view.
IMAX times two. Let's put two IMAXs together. Yeah. All around 360 degree video, audio, all this.
The thing was no one bid off on the idea. Couldn't find the financing. Everyone told him he was crazy.
He's going to spend a lot of money.
He's going to go nowhere with it.
It's just another fucking vanity project.
And there's lots of those in history that are basically, there's a lot of people in
debt because of vanity projects that didn't work out.
But that's what guys and girls like this do.
They take huge risks.
And if it works out, they get paid handsomely.
They're rewarded royally.
But if they don't work out, it spells big trouble for everybody involved.
So lenders and people in finance were like, I don't want to be any part of this.
You know, no one's ever done this before.
So it's almost a blessing that it took so much time for it to come to fruition
because as time went on, he was able to, they were able to get it more advanced
and more advanced to the point where, now this is firsthand reporting
from friends who were at the fish shows who were probably nowhere near the right state of mind.
So, I'm just sharing this with you. And I saw some videos and it's like everybody's taking videos
and staring at the ceiling.
Because it's got to be so cool. I mean, I actually went into a store the other day and there were people that I did not think
were in the demographic of the sphere, but they were talking about how they went.
I mean, I think a lot of people just want to go just to check this out, but they were
talking about how the seats move and it was just so incredible.
And you know, if you have height, fears of height too,
you might wanna-
Be down low.
Think about that, because there's a lot going on
with just the visuals of this thing.
Yes, there's a lot going on.
Let me, I just wanna get a couple of the details here
and I wanna get them correctly
because we get so much incorrectly
that I'd like to try and get something right.
18,600 seats.
16K resolution.
580,000 square feet of LED display.
366 feet high, 516 feet wide.
$2.3 billion.
$2.3 billion.
$2.3 billion.
23 seats are included.
The video screens are one,
it's 160,000 square feet of video screen.
It's 268 million pixels.
Wow.
That's insane.
The sound system, there are 1,586
permanently installed speakers and 300 mobile modules
with 99% of the system being hidden behind the screen.
It's equipped with...
That's too much for you.
I can't even describe that.
I know about it. Mind blown. Yes even describe that. I know about it.
Yes, but you don't know about it.
I understand, but you won't understand.
So I'm not gonna tell you about that.
16 channel amplification, that's wow.
The 4D effects include scent, wind, haptic technology.
Yes, scent and wind.
Scent and wind. Haptic Technology. Yes, Scent and Wind. Scent and Wind.
Wow, that's insane.
It's like a Disney ride times a million.
Exactly, yeah, I'm super excited.
That's incredible.
I think they have rumble boxes under the seats.
So everything that you could ever want
in an entertainment system times a million
with 15,800 of your other friends. So you two played first,
Fish came second. Now we're in the Grateful Dead era and there's a lot, the Eagles are coming up.
I don't know why the Eagles are coming up. But I don't care.
The Eagles are coming up and then there's an EDM show, which was just confirmed,
which I was telling Brian, that's not really my genre, my go-to music, but
my genre, my go-to music, but... No, but...
At the Sphere, that's going to be incredible.
I might be convinced if someone gets me a ticket, if there's someone out there that's
going to go to this EDM thing or any show at the Sphere and you'd like a friend to go
along with you and probably babble the entire time about a 1600 square driver meter XDX
brumble box, then feel free to bring me along.
I promise you just do the
drugs and I'll just talk the entire time, which you can put me in a seat three seats
away from you and it'll be okay. But I would love to go. I will go.
But I think next time like a fish show comes, I would love to go to the Grateful Dead. I
like Grateful Dead. I think they're great. And there was a long time in my life, like a 10-year period
where the Grateful Dead was on rotation, for sure. But I think you go there and-
Well, ending their residency there.
Yeah. I think you go through ebbs and flows with certain bands and certain music styles
and stuff like that. So it's just not on the top of my list right now. Currently,
I'm listening to a lot of Celine Dion, Rhone, and Shift. When did I say I listened to the Grateful
Dead yesterday? No, I watched a video.
You came in the studio and you were humming
and you were like, I was listening
to the Grateful Dead earlier.
What?
Yes.
Yeah, I was watching a video, yes,
of someone at the Grateful Dead show.
I was humming the song.
Oh, that's just what you were watching.
I was watching.
It's not that I never listened to the Grateful Dead.
I think it's like every other thing
that I scroll on is Grateful Dead, but I'm not like listening to it, like, you know, sitting down here like I am.
But this is an amazing accomplishment in human history.
It really is.
And according to my friends who went to the fish show,
it doesn't matter where you stand in the theater, and he was like moving around, right? He's like
a real fish head. He finds a way to get on the floor no matter what ticket he gets, you know what I'm saying?
He's like, he has a side.
Do you know what I'm saying?
You have a side too, right?
Don't you?
You stand on the school side.
Am I right about that?
No.
You're not school side?
No.
What are you?
Which side are you?
I'm whatever.
Okay.
All right.
Yeah, he's like page side, whatever that means.
Okay. We're pages, running for the fishs. Yeah, he's like page side, whatever that means. Okay.
We're pages, run for the fish.
All right.
So he said that no matter where you go in the building
while the music is playing,
it is directed directly at your ears.
It doesn't matter.
It all sounds the same, crystal clear,
crisp as if you had headsets on.
He's like, it's just an accomplishment.
It's way weird. I know.
You know, like when you go to a science museum
and they put one seat, like one egg-shaped sheet,
one egg-shaped sheet.
How do you say it?
Crushing.
Crushing.
Crushing.
Crushing.
Crushing.
Crushing.
Crushing.
Crushing.
Crushing.
Crushing.
I love you.
That's what she just learned how to say. And she goes, I love you. That's what she just learned how to say.
And she goes, I love you.
Oh, she's so fucking cute.
There's one egg-shaped,
egg-shaped seat on one side,
and then another shaped seat on that side.
And then you say hello,
and amazingly it comes through
as if they're talking right next to you.
Wow.
That's like, he said that it's a similar experience. Add to that all of the graphics that have to be
specially made because it's got so many pixels. It's like, you know, 160,000 square feet. So they
have to specially do this. He's and what's amazing about the fish show specifically in Grateful Dead
is that it's different sets every fucking
night. But the visuals largely, I mean, FISH did only, what do they do? 10 shows there
or something?
Something like that.
So they did 10 different visuals. I'm sure a lot of them repeated in different order,
but they did different songs. They only repeated a number of songs every night. But the Grateful
Dead, they're a wily bunch. You can't tell them where to go. They just do what they do. That John Mayer, he's high, really high. He wears
a headset on stage, which I think is so funny. He's in his own world.
He is.
And I just saw a picture of the Grateful Dead facing the screen, because there's a famous
visual, which I don't know if you've seen it, but it-
Of the Sphere?
Of the Sphere, with the Grateful Dead.
When you walk into the theater,
apparently there is a visual up
when you walk into the Grateful Dead show before it starts,
that makes it look like the rafters.
Yes, I did hear this.
And so people who went in for the first time,
now it's been talked about a lot,
but people go in for the first time
thought that the screens had been taken down
and there were just rafters
and there was gonna be like some magic
that was gonna happen or something like that. The magic that happened was the video
started to split open like a lightning strike like they have on some of their stickers.
And what was happening was you were in Haight-Ashbury on Rainbow Row where they started,
the Grateful Dead started, and they take you like on a magical flying experience through
San Francisco and up into the universe, right?
Yes.
Amazing.
I want high fidelity acid.
I want mushrooms.
I want ecstasy.
I want...
Give me all the things.
I want blow in breakfast.
I want blow in brunch.
You know what I'm saying?
When in Vegas.
Oh yeah.
Where are the cops on all this?
That's what I'm still stuck in my 1990s,
Grateful Dead show mode. Cops Vegas. Fish show mode. Where are the cops on all this? That's what, I'm still stuck in my 1990s grateful dead show mode.
Cops, Vegas.
No, fish show mode.
Yeah.
Where are the cops?
Like, I mean, you know, we always used to be so scared about going to those shows and
having just a little bit of weed on us or a couple hits of acid stuck at the bottom
of our shoe or some shit like that.
You would think the cops just stand-
Why am I doing acid anymore, but also too?
Oh, I would.
I would.
Why not?
Yeah. I mean, a lot of the stuff's legal now. So- I would. I would. Why not? Yeah.
I mean, a lot of the stuff's legal now.
Yeah, that's true.
I mean, weed is legal in Vegas, so you can smoke it, but they put it in that like a little
Ziploc, like some kind of, I don't know, special locking device that you can't open
until you get back to the hotel or something.
It's really weird.
Oh, okay.
They have to walk out of the place in like some special Ziplock bag and if it's orange I don't know somebody can explain this to me
But the guy was making me really scared to like take anything out anywhere, but the hotel room
He was like it'll turn colors and then the cops will know and I'm like, oh the cops will know
What is it like?
Is it like an exploding paint bag like a bank robbery?
If I open it up, is it gonna blow up all over me?
Wait, wait, wait, wait.
Okay, so you're talking about, hold on, back up.
So if you take a little weed
and put it into these special bags
that they give you at the Sphere?
No.
Is that what you're saying?
No.
Okay.
I stayed at the world's shittiest roach motel for a podcast conference. It was
unbelievable. Literally dead roaches in my room. It was terrible. It was a terrible, terrible hotel.
I won't mention it because if you're going to go stay there, then I don't want to like dissuade you
because maybe it's changed or something. But it was like really like not the greatest hotel in the
world. It was a casino hotel and And it was really like from the,
actually Elvis stayed there and used to shoot guns in the suite. So if you can figure out which hotel
that is, then there you go. So I walked a mile and a half. The one they're tearing down. Aren't they
tearing down one? The Mirage, I think they just tear down. Is that what it is? Are the golden nugget?
They may have torn that down too. That's like a pastime down there in Vegas. Like let's blow up a
hotel that's 10 years old.
Well, did you see how if you saw that though with that specific hotel that are that casino that they they had all this money they had to give away because over all of the years like under law, Nevada law, you have to pay out the money that has people have never claimed, I guess.
Yes. Or was never paid. So they were doing like these major jackpot weekends.
Yeah, they were changing the jackpot weekends.
I can't even imagine what that was,
how overrun those, bombarded those places are.
I can tell you, because I went to the world's shittiest hotel
where it's like a $1.50 per night,
and it was like so packed, and it was a scene.
There was a whole scene.
Oh, I told the story, You can go listen to it.
So anyway, so I ended up walking like a mile and a half
to go to a weed store.
Cause I was like, oh, weed is legal, right?
Let me go to a weed store.
And I was with some friends and we were like,
oh, we gotta do this at least once, right?
I had never been into a dispensary, never.
So I was like, let's go.
I wanna see what this is all about.
Let's go and I'll fucking get a gummy bag or something.
You know, hit it up.
Let this enemy have gummy bags.
Tasty.
Yeah. Tasty, Tiener.
Gummy.
Yeah.
Do you have any jelly bellies?
Sour Patch Kids.
I thought it was going to be a candy store.
So we went, it was like in the same plot of land
that a rundown McDonald's was,
and they had massage parlors all around.
It was just like now the best part of town.
And they had three separate air-locked doors.
You know what I'm saying?
Like press the buzzer, and then there's a big camera.
And the guy was like, look into the camera.
He was like this.
He was like, look into the camera.
And I was like, hey bro, hey. Hey. Have your friend look into the camera. It was like this. I was like, Hey, bro. Hey,
Hey,
have your friend look into the camera.
I'm like, Hey, what are we doing here? And then the other
people look into the camera.
And I was like, Okay, and open it, close it real quick. You
know, and then we're like in this other room. And it's just
like a little tiny hallway. Yeah.
Show me your IDs.
Where I'll like, you know, show an IDs.
Show me your face again.
Okay, here I am.
How big is your penis?
It's like, I just want to get some weed.
Oh, that's two doors down.
This is the massage parlor.
So then we get in and then guy was super friendly,
Bud Tender was like super friendly. But he was out of everything. Like he was like, oh man,
spend a busy week, you know, we're out, we're waiting on the, you know, it's hard to get
sometimes and blah, blah, blah. And so he's showing us all these other things. So then everyone gets
whatever they get. And he puts it, he- I mean, it's like a menu too. It's crazy. I've been to
the mountain Colorado, but it's like, you know, if you want to go to sleep, here's what you get. If you want to be peppy, this is what you get.
Yeah, you want to pep in your step.
Yeah, this, that, and the other. It's for everything.
Never have I ever, yeah, pain. Never have I ever said the words, I got stoned and I was peppy.
It's just never have I ever. I got stoned and I was paranoid. I got stoned and I went to sleep. I got stoned
and I, you know, tried to pee for three hours. Like, I mean, there you go. Anyway, so he
says, okay, we'll do wrap it up. And then he puts it in this weird Ziploc bag. And the
Ziploc bag has like a weird locking mechanism on top of it. And it locks.
It's like a child lock, basically.
Almost, yeah. And he goes, all right, get where you're going and then open it up there.
And I was like, oh, okay. It's not, I thought it was illegal. It's like, it is legal, but that
thing will turn change colors and the cops see you and they bust you. And I was like, what?
Why? I have a bleed bag in here or something? What's going on? What do you mean? I didn't
understand. So then, you know, I'm already, I'm paranoid about the legal weed. Now I'm paranoid
about the legal weed. Paint bags are going to blow up in my face.
I'm going to be orange walking down the street and the cops are going to arrest me for opening
the bag.
We say that you open your bag.
You open your bag!
Sir, step out of the car.
Step out of the car with your orange face.
Did you open your weed bag before you got to the hotel?
I didn't know.
I didn't know.
No exon excuse, sir.
I'm sorry.
I'm going to have to arrest.
Ten years minimum.
I'm going to have to arrest you.
I'm going to have to arrest you.
I'm going to have to arrest you.
I'm going to have to arrest you.
I'm going to have to arrest you. I'm going to have to arrest you. I'm going to have to arrest you. I'm going to have to arrest you. Did you open your weed bag before you got to the hotel? I didn't know, I didn't know.
No exon excuse, sir. I'm sorry, I'm gonna have to rest. Ten years minimum for opening your weed bag.
I thought it was legal!
It's kinda legal.
Semi-legal.
It's legal once you get where you're going, but it's not legal here.
In route, it's not legal.
Oh, okay.
So anyway, but it's legal in Vegas, so, but I can imagine that's a, that's got to be a
hep drug scene going on at the Sphere.
Probably.
Oh, come on.
I've seen the videos of the girls twirling and whirling, you know, when their tie dies.
That's not, we don't do that on a regular Tuesday afternoon.
I'm sure that some people do, but you know, most people don't do that on a Tuesday afternoon. You know, they're getting at
it. And so, but I mean, it's Vegas and that's where it stays where it stays. And listen,
there's lots of FET, Bonnaroo and all these other Fests, like, of course there's drugs.
Of course there's drugs.
Of course.
I remember when, was it you and I went to, yeah, when you and I went to Bonnaroo
and I had some like medicine for my back, like some muscle relaxers
or something. I don't even know what it was. It wasn't anything good. It was just like, you know,
sometimes my back gets tweaky and I just, I threw like three of them in a bottle and put them in
there. But the, the, the, in the bottle was labeled my name, but man.
Remember when we met Ozzy? Was that before or after we met Ozzy?
Ozzy who? Ozzy Osborne?
Ozzy Osborne.
I don't remember meeting Ozzy. Did we meet Ozzy Osborne?
He was in the lobby of that hotel. Oh, that's right. Ozzy Osborne. I don't remember meeting Ozzy Osborne. Did we meet Ozzy Osborne?
He was in the lobby of that hotel.
Oh, that's right.
Holy shit, I remember that.
That was not a hotel.
That was a motel.
At best.
Well, that's Bonnaroo.
That's Bonnaroo.
At best, that was a motel.
Anyways, you had the bag of pills.
And I had it in the bag, and they went through everything.
And then they made me like, they were like looking at my ID
and looking at the pill bottle, and I was like,
oh, that's a lot of drama to go through
for some fucking muscle relaxers.
I mean, I can understand if I had some heroin in there,
make sure that I have my legal prescription for heroin.
But anyway, I am super excited.
This sphere has changed entertainment in a way,
and it's not like-
Some people I know have gone multiple times.
This guy that I know that went to Phish,
he went to like six of the 10 concerts, right?
I can afford to do that.
He's like, he's got some money,
but he can afford to do that.
But a lot of people that I know have at least been to one
of the either YouTube, Phish or Grateful Dead
have been to one of the shows.
And this is not hype.
This is real.
People are like, it lives up to everything
everybody's been talking about.
Videos do not do it justice.
And even the videos are amazing.
So if the videos don't do it justice,
I can't imagine, I want to go.
If anybody wants to bring me to the Sphere for any concert,
I will try and get a pass from my wife,
but you can at least invite me if you wanna be nice.
You can invite all of us to your sphere box because there's 27 suites.
Are there?
Yeah, that's what it said.
Okay.
So I don't know.
Of course there are.
Yeah, of course there are. Like Eddie Vedder was at the U2 concert or something. You think
he was hanging out with everybody? No, of course not. Fuck that. But it'll be interesting
to see how the Eagles go over. Not my favorite band in the world, admittedly.
Yeah.
It's a little past my time and it's a lot past my time actually. And it's not my thing. I do like Don Henley though. I do like Don Henley as well.
I like some of his solo stuff a little better than I like the...
End of the Innocence.
Mine is...
I got a dead head sticker on a Cadillac.
A little voice inside my head said, don't look back, you can never look back.
I can't see you, I'm so shining in the sun.
One of my other favorites, in a New York minute.
You don't know in the New York minute?
Oh God, that's a...
I want to do an episode and you tell me if you'd like to do this.
I want to do an episode, and I don't care.
I'll take the chance.
I'll demonetize it.
I'll talk to our network or whatever.
I want to do an episode where we play each other songs and see if we can make each other
cry.
Like the saddest songs ever.
Like cry like musically cry.
I want to...
I don't know why, but I just had this idea in my head.
I thought you were going to say laugh.
No.
We do that all the time. I'm talking about the opposite.
Let's make each other cry.
Who wants to weep here on air?
Tune in next week when we make each other cry.
Absolutely depressing song. Okay, that went off with like a wet fart in church,
but hey, it was an idea. I'm trying.
There's no wrong in brainstorming.
And there's no wrong in the commercial break because we do have enough episodes.
It's okay.
We can try something that doesn't work every once in a while.
All right.
We'll be back and we're going to talk about Brian Moses' appearance.
Very controversial.
A lot of people are supposedly going to be buzzing about Brian Moses' appearance this
week and Chrissy and I will talk more about that when we get back.
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Okay, Brian Moses came in this week. He was great.
We loved having Brian in on the show.
Brian, if you haven't listened to the episode,
go back and listen to the episode.
Tuesday's episode, infomercial.
What are you looking at?
I'm sorry, I was looking at the sphere on Instagram.
Oh yeah, that's from the fish show.
I mean, and that's crazy.
It's just crazy visuals.
And do they do it, do they do a different thing
on the outside?
On the outside, yes.
So it's different from the inside and the outside.
Yeah, the outside.
It just shows outside different stuff.
The outside is covered completely in LED screens,
and there's been a lot of pictures that have been taken
of some pretty amazing visuals.
Yes.
Yeah, when I was there, they were testing it.
So when I was driving to the airport, we just had- Like a big eye? I was there, they were testing it. So when I was driving
to the airport, we just had, yeah, there was like a big eye. Yes. That was really fucked
up. I was like, what the fuck? And the cab driver was trying to explain it to me. I love
my cab driver, but I only understood about every third word he was saying mainly because
he was facing forward. But then, you know, English wasn't his first language, but I loved
him. We ended up having a great conversation because he had to take me to the airport twice. Oh, God, that's right.
I forgot about that. Anyway, okay. Brian Moses comes on the show. He is the executive producer
and general string puller of the Roast Battle League, which has had television shows. It's
been going on for 11 straight years, as you heard. The Ro roast battle birthday was the day that he came on the show.
And when we started to talk toward the end of the conversation, he started talking about the, I started talking about like the rules and like, does anybody get in a fight? And they take it
personally and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And Chrissy opened her mouth and said, we should do
a roast battle. And Brian didn't miss a beat. He was like, do it, I'll have you. I'll do the commercial
break roast battle. Brian with an I do it, I'll have you. I'll do the commercial break roast battle.
Brian with an I.
Yes, Brian Moses. Because I do talk about myself in the third person sometimes. I'm working with
my therapist on that. Something about narcissism, I'm not sure. We'll get to it. But Chrissy didn't
miss a beat, then Brian didn't miss a beat, and then I also didn't miss a beat, getting on it like,
oh my God, we got really excited here in the room.
Then Brian and I communicated after the show,
like directly after we got off, he communicated,
we communicated and he gave us a date.
And he said, here's the date if you guys wanna do it.
Now just, I won't say the date because
we have done this way too much.
And I'm not gonna look at the notebook either.
No, no, no, don't even look at the notebook. I threw it off the table because anytime we even
talk about the notebook, it never happens. But this appears at least that the wheels are in motion.
First of all, RBL, Roast Battle League on YouTube, please go check it out. I think you're going to
enjoy it. I think this could be a great idea for the commercial. I think it could be good
for the audience. I think the tea kettle needs to release for the commercial. I think so too. I think it could be good for the audience.
The tea kettle needs to release some steam sometimes.
Let's go.
Let's just beat it up on stage.
We'll hug it out afterwards.
Hopefully no third parties will get involved and start beating each other.
But Chrissy and I are going to, it appears, execute on this idea.
So now, a call to the listeners. First of all, we're going to need roasts, we're going to
need lines. So if you have any good ones you can think of regarding either of us, not two mean
spirited guys. We're not talking about...
Yeah, there are a couple of things I was thinking about this last night. There's a couple of things
that are going to be off.
Okay, let's talk about the rules. Well, let's start to talk about the rules. Because I'm sure
they're going to get refined as we go along.
Yeah. Well, I mean, there's, I think there's just a couple of things that need to be off
the table. Like he was saying the other day that, you know, it's helped some people,
it's helped some people get through grief because somebody that they love might have just died.
Oh, I would never go there.
So my sister's passing is not to be. That died, another person's roasting that. So, my sister's passing
is not to be. That's off the table.
Jared Sussman Okay. So, let's stop for just a moment. We'll
talk about this for one moment, because this has never been mentioned on the show before.
Chrissy took time off last year and a lot of people asked why there was someone else
in the seat, what happened, is the show breaking up? And I explained time and time again, on
air, that no, the show wasn't breaking up, that
Chrissy was dealing with a family emergency and that was that.
So-
And that was that.
And that was.
Chrissy's sister passed away.
Yes.
Six weeks after my grandfather passed away.
So that was, it was a big shock for everybody, cancer related.
And yeah.
Fuck cancer.
Get your screenings.
Definitely get your screening. listen to your own body,
demand additional testing when you feel it's necessary
and don't stop until you get it.
Even if that means you have to beg, borrow, steal
to pay for it yourself.
That's all I gotta say.
We won't go into a long siloulet about it now.
When Chrissy's ready, she can share if she wants to.
But this is why Chrissy took time off.
Her grandfather passed and then her sister
quickly passed and it was a shock to everybody. And I did my best to keep the train on the
tracks while she needed.
You guys did a great job and I appreciate that.
Thank you. Well, of course, of course.
Family.
Yeah, we're family.
But anyways, that's off the table.
Of course. Yeah, I wouldn't go there. Never.
Well, he mentioned that. During the interview, I was like, wow. I mean, I can't even imagine.
But I can see how some people might find that. Listen, I was going to share with him this,
and I was going to ask his opinion about this. Joan Rivers died. She was a notorious roaster,
right? She would do roasts, and she would be on the dais at the, whatever they call that in New York, the Friars
Club. And sometimes, my understanding is, from what I've heard, I never, I wasn't there.
I wasn't there. I don't know.
Nicole Soule-Nagant
She would do this sometimes.
Jared Ranere Sometimes, maybe.
Nicole Soule-Nagant
From what I've heard. Well, I want to be clear because then people are like,
how do you know that? I don't really know that. I just heard it. So, don't believe anything you hear on the show or anywhere else, quite frankly, unless you've seen it with your eyes. I don't really know that. I just heard it. So don't believe anything you hear on the show
or anywhere else, quite frankly, unless you've seen it with your eyes. I guess that's my point.
And I've learned my lesson over time on the commercial break, not to say I absolutely know,
when I was not there myself. So I have heard, mainly I also heard about Joan
because of the Howard Stern Show. She was on the Howard Stern Show a lot. They were like good friends. And he gave the eulogy, one of the eulogies at her funeral. And this
is just days or a week after she passed and he roasted Joan as his eulogy. And it was
universally applauded. It was applauded because they said, that's what she would have wanted.
She laughed and that's what she wanted. She wanted people to laugh. That was her whole life's pursuit was to make light of bad situations and make everybody feel a little
bit better. And so, that's what she wanted. So, I can't understand how in certain circumstances
that would be the case, but your life's pursuit is not roasting people. And so, I don't think that I
would ever, I would never do that. Don't worry about that. But it's clear now that's off the
table. I think what also might need to be taken off the table just a little bit is spouses and family members, because we're not asking them to get
involved in the roast. They didn't ask for this, right? So, I can't go up there and make fun of
Jeff Smith, you know, huge penis. Like, I can't do that. Well, I wouldn't do that because it's huge.
But you know what I'm saying.
Yeah, I do. Yes. But this depth-
We'll come up with a little, we'll come up with some guidelines, our own internal guidelines.
Our own internal guidelines.
I mean, I told Astrid last night, I told her about this and she kind of gave me the side
eyes.
She was like, you're such a wussy.
You're not, you know, you really want to do this?
And I'm like, no, I'm just a wussy to you.
I'm not really a wussy to everybody else.
I'll come home and cry about it later.
She goes, exactly.
That's what I don't want. I don't want either. You made yourself do this,
and now you're all upset because people were laughing at things that were hurtful.
And I'm like, I don't be able to take it. She's like, I don't think so. But okay,
whatever you guys want to do is okay. I just wanted to get a trip out to La Jolla so that we could go to Tijuana. Absolutely. There's no better excuse.
Live show with Brian Moses in La Jolla.
Well, there's some softballs and then go out in La Jolla and Tijuana.
We'll do five minutes of the commercial break and then we'll leave.
I'll talk about your naked apron kitchen cooking and then you'll talk about my bald head and the fact that I don't know anything that I talk about
and then how I bloviate half the time.
And then we'll just leave.
I don't know if I can say anything.
You can, you have to.
You're okay.
It's okay.
Like he said, there are levels of this
and people who know each other roast each other.
Well, I almost think it would be easy to roast somebody
I didn't know as well as you.
That's a different kind of roast battle.
That's like an improv roast battle.
And when you don't know somebody,
how are you gonna say something mean about them
except for their looks, which I think is just kind of,
you know, okay.
Their looks or their work, you know,
cause they're usually comedians, right?
That are doing this to each other.
I mean, this is crowd work.
That's all it is.
Like people are doing crowd work,
but they're doing it on spec.
So it's either what they say to you or their looks or who they're with or whatever.
We can do this. And how we're going to do it is we are going to get professionals to help us.
That's right. That's right.
I'm not doing this unless Brian agrees to have coaches on standby.
So at least we can get there one day early and write some stuff on a note card that you can have as backup in case, you know, you kind of falter.
Because there's also probably going to be a full house.
I don't know, but I have to, I'm going to guess.
Maybe not.
It is the commercial break.
So maybe, maybe Brian's like, we usually have about 250 people in here, not two.
And who is that?
Jeff and Astrid?
Okay.
All right. Just check.
We usually have a full house.
We usually have a full house. Now we have the opposite of whatever full house meant.
Listen, it's going to be-
Empty house.
We have an empty house. We have a vacant house. We have a full house. Today is a vacant house.
You know, they usually have the no vacancy sign where the no turns off.
Well, the no turned off, just sharing that with you guys.
What if Brian's like,
well, I was gonna give you a cut of the door,
but there was no door to give you a cut of.
They actually said they're not paying me tonight.
We had a good 11 year run
until the commercial break decided to show up and shit all over the floor.
I feel like we're those dogs that wipe our ass across the floor wherever we go.
Oh, it feels good to laugh again and not cough.
Yeah, I know.
It feels good to hear it.
Oh my God.
We are gonna have fun with this.
We are, we are.
We're gonna have fun with this.
We don't have to cut too deep.
We don't have to get super personal.
There's things that we can take off the table.
I'm okay with that.
But I'd love to hear the audience's opinion.
Like the audience can start coaching us right now. You guys got
one-liners or zingers? We need to start like a Google Doc or something where we
just come up with ideas. Yeah, text us or DM us. It's probably better if you DM us,
but go ahead and text us also. 212-433-3822, 212-433-3TCB. Text us and
text us your one-liners
and then ask for it or whoever answers them.
Can start putting them in Google.
Or even just subjects maybe.
Yeah, like topics.
Like, you know, Brian's an asshole.
Okay, all right, got that one.
If you could do that, then we're gonna do this.
Also, I wanna start a betting pool.
Now we can't legally start a betting pool
because I want to give all the money away like Vegas when the commercial break goes away.
I'll start it when I go out to Vegas.
Yes, that's true. Get a line. Do you think they'll have a line on us?
I'll start it.
Because I think-
Can I submit a line?
I think you can. I think there's got to be some bookie somewhere that'll take the action
on this. What did you have to say when you were talking to Sam earlier?
And you were telling your Vegas story
about you said these two guys were betting on the plane.
I thought you meant they were so derelict
they were betting on the plane.
Oh, betting on whether or not it was gonna take off or crash.
Ha ha ha ha ha.
I would have been nervous about that one. I would have been nervous about that one.
I would have been like, uh, stewardess, attendant please.
That's Sam Marill by the way, Sam Marill will be in,
anyway, so I am super excited about this.
I think this is, I think it's gonna be a lot of fun.
It's gonna give us a good excuse to get to La Jolla
and get down to Tijuana.
We're gonna record every minute of all of it.
Yes, you're gonna have your hobo nap sack.
I'm gonna have my hobo nap sack.
I think I still have that backpack somewhere.
I'm gonna get it.
We have to recreate it.
I'm gonna recreate it just.
You should reach out to your friend
that you traveled out there with too.
Oh, she doesn't talk to me anymore.
No.
Maybe I should contact her about roasting ideas.
You should.
Maybe she'll talk to you.
I don't know.
She married this guy and I just loved her to death.
But when she went out to California to go to school, obviously things got different
between us.
And this is before everyone was texting back and forth every single minute.
I mean, we were texting, but not every single, not like we are now. And I went to her wedding
with a guy that, you know, she loved him. I wasn't approving, but that's, I won't tell that story on
air because it's deeply personal and I just didn't care for it. And I thought he was, anyway, so we,
I was about to start telling the story. I'm like, Brian, you just said
you're not gonna tell the story,
I'm not gonna tell the story.
I'm gonna leave this one for, I'll tell you.
So-
Okay, you didn't like the dude.
Didn't like the dude, but I went to the wedding
because I wanted to support her.
I didn't, it wasn't like I was trying
to stand in between them, I just didn't, like literally.
Do you blah, blah, blah, take-
He was threatened, is what you're gonna say.
Is that what this boils down to?
Yes. Okay.
I think that's what it boils down to
is that he didn't like the closeness of the friendship.
So he may have given her an ultimatum
or maybe she decided it was best for her life.
I'm so glad Jeff was totally loving
and supportive of our friendship.
Oh, he could have gone the other way.
Not one for one ounce of a minute has he ever been like,
ah, all right.
Not once, not once for a minute
was Astrid ever like that either.
Yeah, so nice.
Yeah, because quite frankly, I mean, I don't know about you.
Somebody has to be confident is what it is, yeah.
Listen, we've been friends at that point for five years.
Like, if it hadn't happened yet,
it probably ain't gonna happen,
so you got nothing to worry about. And I am supporting of anyone's choice of love because people
have been supporting my choice of love. It was goddamn clear that was a terrible situation.
I mean, you voiced your opinion, certainly, and you shared your pushback, but not in a
way that became destructive to our friendship.
No, I was still hanging out with you. Just not you together with her. You shared your pushback, but not in a way that became destructive to our friendship.
Just not you together with her.
It turned out you and everybody else, Chrissy. You and everybody else.
I knew you'd come around.
Yeah. And then she would be like, you never take me out with your friends.
You don't introduce me to your friends. And I'm like, no, I have.
They didn't like all the yelling and screaming.
They didn't like how it'd be there for 10 minutes and then all of a sudden you and I are in a fight about nothing and I have to go
all of a sudden. They didn't like that stuff. Anyway, so I wish I could get ahold of her.
And she only ate salsa.
Well, for a period, but you know, yeah, you're right. Okay. That's true.
Salsa.
There's really no going out to dinners.
Yeah, you're right. Okay.
That's true.
There's really no going out to dinners.
No.
Salsa and cupcakes.
That was about it.
Oh, she loved to go out to a good, expensive dinner.
But then what happened afterwards?
I don't know.
Anyway, I don't want to get into it.
Okay.
That's a sensitive subject.
I don't want to, I'm not trying to piss on anybody's plate and especially not if there
may be underlying problems there.
But here's what I'll say.
I think that's a good roast idea though.
Oh, yeah. I mean, you can go there. Xs are fair game, I think. I don't know. Yeah, I think Xs might need to be fair game.
I think Xs are fair game, but not in name, in personality.
Our list rules.
I know. You can't talk about my penis.
Can't say my ex's names.
Can't...
Now you can say my ex's names.
Why not?
We'll bleep it out if we feel that way afterwards.
Yeah, say her name.
We'll figure it out.
I don't give a shit.
I've never said her name, but I don't...
You can.
It was not me, it was you.
But what do I care?
What do I care?
I haven't talked to her in 10 years.
Wasn't all of a sudden it's going to be a problem?
No, it's not.
And now I'm still afraid.
I'm still afraid. You got PTSD. I'm still afraid we're going to get into a fight.
You got PTSD.
I do. I did. I know I did. I know I did for a fact.
For good reason.
That one almost took me down. That relationship almost took me down. And I think this will
resonate in the crowd. And I know we were talking about a rose and now we're talking about my ex
girlfriend, but just bear with me for a moment. There are relationships that will eat you from the inside out and are so toxic that they start to destroy
you and everything else around you. And if that's the case, I know it's really hard sometimes to see
the forest through the trees, but if you know this internally somewhere, it's just like a little,
tiny little voice saying-
Yep, yep, yep. You know. voice saying. You know, you know.
I've been in that kind of relationship too before.
Get a friend, get a family member,
hang on to them for dear life and say,
drag me out of this because that's what you need really.
Yeah, you have to have help.
Yeah, you have to get healed.
Yeah, and by the way, I'm not saying it was all her fault.
Sometimes personalities get together
and that's what becomes toxic.
So I don't really know and I don't care.
I'm not going to Monday morning quarterback it all that much more than I already have
for seven years.
But I will share with you that whatever kind of absolute, you know,
cauldron of bullshit was going on, it was terrible.
You take a little Brian and then you take a little salsa and then you take some some cupcakes, and a broken window, and a broken window, and wha-bam! Brian's borderline dead. He's dead on
the inside. Will he die on the outside? We don't know, question mark. Questions remain! Even for the quantum witch.
Oh, quantum witch wouldn't have been able to figure that one out.
All right, so Rose battle coming up, probably, definitely before the end of the year.
So pay attention.
We think, we heard.
We think, we might, we heard that that might be happening.
If we get approval from our spouses and our agents.
No, I'm kidding.
So stay tuned, start sending
your zingers in and start betting on who's winning this. Start betting on who's winning
this. I want to hear it loud and clear. You can't have both. You have one. So we're going
to see, we're going to start a notepad. What am I, 12? Start a notepad. We're going to
start a Google sheet and we're going to see how many listeners vote for Chrissy and how
many listeners vote for Brian.
And maybe we'll give something, if you vote right, maybe we'll like give something to
the winners.
A prize from Tijuana.
Yeah, a prize from Tijuana.
One magic hydrocodone.
Pharmacia.
Pharmacia.
Sounds magical, Chrissy.
All right.
We'll be back. Pharmacia! Pharmacia! Sounds magical, Chrissy!
All right, we'll be back.
Chrissy!
Chrissy!
Chrissy!
Chrissy!
Chrissy!
Chrissy!
Chrissy!
Chrissy!
Chrissy!
Chrissy!
Chrissy!
Chrissy!
Chrissy!
Chrissy!
Chrissy!
Chrissy!
Chrissy! Chrissy! Chrissy! Chrissy! Chrissy! at the commercial break and on TikTok at TCB Podcast. Text us or leave us a voicemail at 212-433-3TCB
if you wanna chat, suggest content or simply complain.
We'll take what we can get.
While you're at it, don't forget that all of our audio
and video lives on our website, tcbpodcast.com
as well as future information on TCB Live.
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Okay.
I just want to share this for a minute, because I think this is fucking crazy,
a little more serious side.
So there's this show on TLC.
You know, I like some shows on TLC.
You don't have to be a genius to figure it out.
If you listen to the show, even three episodes,
you'll probably figure out that Brian
has some horseshit reality show that he's watching on TLC.
But sometimes it's just in the background,
like it is right now, like we have it on limited.
It's right there.
Yes.
So anyway, so there's this show on there called My Big Fat Fabulous Life. And the person on that
show, her name is Whitney, like Whitney Thor, Thor, Whitney something. Whitney is the star of the
show. And basically the whole show revolves around Whitney being a normal person while she's also overweight and she's overweight.
Like, you know, she's got a good amount of weight on her. And so she got famous because
she did a series of dance videos and a lot of people reacted to them, including celebrities
that were like, wow, that girl can go even though she's got a lot of weight on her. And
that I guess they gave her a show and said, oh, let's see the rest of your life, like
how you get through dating and, you know, just basically proving that doesn't matter what you look like or how, what size
you are, you can still do the things that you can still have fun and live. Like you
don't have to be whatever. Right. So I get it. Body positivity message. There it is.
Fantastic. It has been on for many seasons. I am not that invested in this television
show. I really don't care. I think Whitney is fine. I get it. I understand
It's just not very interesting to me. It's kind of formulaic
but
The I did notice that the beginning of this season. She looked like she had lost
Weight and she mentions in the beginning of this season that I lost her mother all her mother died
very suddenly stroke and then had another stroke and then died
in previous seasons. And so I guess this is just like a year and a half now when they're filming
this next season. It's just a year and a half. And she said, after my mother died, I lost 50 or 60
pounds very quickly. I am assuming there is medication involved, but I don't know that for
sure. But it's noticeable, right? And they are filming a scene. This is why I mentioned it.
They're filming a scene and then all of the sudden,
there are large bangs in her house and there's large bangs.
It's like at nighttime and you can hear these bangs.
They almost sound like gunshots, but they're not.
And then everyone gets scared and then the doorbell rings.
And on the ring doorbell, you can see someone full mask,
full sweatsuit, all dressed in black,
dropping flowers off at the front door.
And then this person runs away,
gets into a car, screeches off.
Like, why are you doing this?
It's a little weird.
Yeah, that's bizarre.
Okay, well first of all, bang, bang, bang.
And then ring at the doorbell,
somebody in a full suit of burglar, burglar suit.
Burglar suit, dropping flowers off, and then screech is
off.
Okay.
Or maybe they added the screeching for effect, but I don't know, you know, those editors,
they're a wily bunch.
But it is a little weird.
At first, you don't know what's going on.
And then of course they go to a commercial break and then they come back, of course.
And then they come back and what happened was her house had gotten egged.
They had thrown a bunch of eggs at the house, the car, at other places. They had someone had thrown a bunch of eggs
and this person left the flowers
and now those flowers had a note.
And that note, I don't even want to begin
to describe what that note said,
but that note was not nice.
Like it's not, obviously he was dressed all in black.
I didn't think you should expect like, you know,
I secretly love you and eggs.
It was a terrible, terrible note.
It was basically like you die, you fat piece of shit. You know, it was like that. It was a terrible, terrible, no. It was basically like, you die, you fat piece
of shit. It was like that. And that was like the language in there. And she obviously gets
upset about this. Her family members are with her. They're trying to console her a little
bit like, hey, millions of people love you. And she starts explaining, I did this show
to show people that you can still live life no matter what, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. She gives her her elevator pitch
about the show, but I was like shocked that, you know, well, first of all, they do film
her at her house a lot and they do show the front of the house a lot and they say which
city she lives in and it's not a very big city and it's, it's in the Southeast. It's
not a very big city. I'm not going to mention it because I'm not going to add any drama to this. But,
so obviously it'd probably be pretty easy to figure out if you live in that city,
where that street was, where that house was. And I don't think-
Or it probably gets around to-
Yes. But how fucking hateful do you have to be to get involved if you don't like the reality show
and you don't like the message that she's sending and you're not interested in people
that have weight on them, then don't pay attention to it.
Don't look at them.
Don't Google them.
Don't bother them.
What in the good fuck?
There's two of my family members are having an argument right now.
They're very fussy with each other and they're always going back and forth. And I'm always hearing-
About the show?
No, not about the show. I'm just sharing that they're very fussy with each other. So here's,
here was my piece of advice yesterday to one of the family members. Don't call him. Don't text him.
Don't bother him. Because obviously you guys are up each other's asses right now. There's something
going on. Everybody's fussy in the situation.
Why even bother?
Why make yourself, why put yourself in the middle of that?
Don't worry about it.
It's like me with the ex-girlfriend.
Just drag yourself.
I never did it, but I know it's hard to do it.
But that's also much more personal.
Eventually I did, yes.
But you know.
Yeah, well it's called boundaries.
Yeah.
Yes, I've been going to therapy a lot to get through things. But yes, it's boundaries. It's called boundaries. Yes, I've been going to therapy a lot to get through things, but yes, it's boundaries.
It's called boundaries. And if you do this, I'm not going to engage.
Jared Ranere That's it.
Beth Dombkowski Mm-hmm.
Jared Ranere That's it.
Beth Dombkowski These are my boundaries. And if you do that,
you can do it.
Jared Ranere What kind of?
Beth Dombkowski You can do it all you want, but I'm not going to engage.
Jared Ranere I'm not going to engage. What kind of fuck twad feels the necessity to just, you know,
vandalize, destroy, send hateful notes, death threats,
and all this, what kind of fuck twad feels the necessity
to do that to someone that you obviously could just turn off?
You don't have to be bothered by it.
Listen, we get some not so nice things said about us too.
Luckily, we have never gotten to that point,
but we get some nice, not so nice things said about us too. Luckily, we have never gotten to that point,
but we get some nice, not so nice things said about us.
Now you just got the person that showed up at the door
that had a conversation with your ring doorbell.
Oh yeah, that might have, yeah.
That girl, that lady was crazy.
That lady was crying, crying.
Ring me on my ring.
Okay, talk to you later.
Bring me back on the ring.
Stop by my house and leave me a message on my ring.
Yeah, I just, I just, like I'm, Talk to you later. Bring me back on the ring. But I- Nicole Soule-Nagant Stop on my house and leave me a message on my ring.
Jared Soule-Nagant Yeah, I just, I just, like I'm, ever since-
Nicole Soule-Nagant Well, I mean, this has been going on for
a while.
Jared Soule-Nagant Yes.
It's been going-
Nicole Soule-Nagant Yeah, and people are sick.
Jared Soule-Nagant People are, they get behind that computer or they
get behind that, whatever, that cell phone or whatever it is, and they think it has magical
powers to like dehumanize anybody and anything
that they find even the least bit irritating. And why you would take the time out of your
day to buy the eggs, the flowers, handwrite the note, you know, drive to someone's house.
Well, do you think what I have to say, now this is on a reality show, so do you think
there's any type of manufactured part of this?
I mean, it's all manufactured at the end of the day.
I mean, how long did they talk about this?
Was the whole show?
No, no, no.
There was just like a segment.
It's like-
It was a two-parter because they went to commercial
and came back, so.
This is one of the only, yeah, it's true.
They certainly had a cliffhanger.
At least there's two sections.
Yes.
It was probably two segments,
so let's say 15 minutes of the show.
It's the only one that I've watched of this show
that I've watched all the way through
because I felt like I needed like some kind of context
as to what was going on.
There was no context.
Like they didn't lead up to it.
It was just a hateful 15 minutes.
They obviously made a strategic decision to share it.
Hate crime, that's what they call it.
Yeah, absolutely.
And then she mentions that this has happened before
in the past.
Bricks have been thrown through her window, cars have been smashed.
And they never meant, I don't know because I don't watch it a ton, but this didn't seem
like a ploy for attention.
This seemed like sharing a really fucked up moment that happened in the hopes that it
gets through to somebody, I guess.
I get it.
Roasting somebody.
Go on your little YouTube
channel and say you don't like the girl, right? I think she can probably deal with that. She does
deal with that. I gotta imagine we deal with it and we're nowhere near as many people listen to
us as probably watch her. But like, do you really have to take the physical action in the real world
to like try and harm somebody or their things or their
friends or their family. It seems so incredibly. Well, it's not normal. I mean, a healthy,
happy person would not do that. Oh, it's clear that this person has problems. Yeah. I mean,
so it's the people have problems with themselves. Yeah. And I imagine they saw the filming trucks
outside and they decided this could be my moment of fame. Let me get my message out. Let me have my moment.
Let me put my black mask on.
Yeah, let me put my black mask on. Because you know that you got to know there's cameras
at the house. I mean, there's cameras at the house. They're filming right now.
Everybody has a camera now.
Yes. Ring me on my ring. I mean, everyone has a camera and there's cameras everywhere
in the world and please put them up all over the corners. And very little of our lives
is actually private unless you're having a conversation with your wife in a lead bunker
where no cell phone is anywhere close to it.
Right?
I mean, that's it.
And so, I just thought I'd share, I like to think that the audience that follows us and
listens to us has a healthy dose of empathy.
Sanity?
Yeah, sanity and empathy.
I know that's probably not true of every single listener,
but I'd like to think so.
I inherently like to think that people are good.
I know that they're all not.
But I'd like to think that until proven otherwise.
Yeah, and I don't bring this up for any other point,
but to just share that the world is a really wonderful place,
but there are really ugly corners of the world,
and it all starts on the fucking internet.
That's all I gotta say, it all starts online.
Because you know there's probably some big, you know,
corner of the internet where this woman is a target
of so many people's ire.
For nothing else except for being overweight.
And you know, why?
I'm sad for her, but I'm also sad for those people too.
That's sad that that's what you've dedicated your life to
is being hateful.
Oh, I'm more sad for those people.
I have more empathy for those people
because Whitney's gonna be just fine.
She got a television show, she's making money,
she's in the limelight.
I'm saying everything's hunky dory with her,
but you know, she's going to be just fine.
She's going to keep trucking.
There'll probably be another season or two or three or four of this.
You know, people seem to like it.
Well, they're going to have to change the name if she keeps losing weight.
That's true.
I thought about that too.
What are you going to do?
But I mean, you know, hey, listen, whatever, you know, she has, she has both.
Well, I hope she does, at least for health reasons.
Yeah, I agree with you.
And I know that there are, I agree with you.
I know that there are, I don't know everything about weight and my weight fluctuates too.
Sometimes I have 20 pounds, 30 pounds, 40 pounds extra at times.
When I had my second child, I looked at pictures the other day with my, one of my daughters
wanted to look and see pictures from this time period for whatever reason.
And I was a bigger boy than I am now.
And I was like, wow.
But I noticed that over the years,
because I've lived enough life, it fluctuates.
When I got my divorce from my first wife,
I was a good chunky healthy boy.
I mean, I was-
Well, I remember you lost weight.
You lost a lot of weight.
I lost 60 pounds in like six months.
It was crazy.
Not six months, but like a year.
But yeah, I mean-
You got off your ramen.
Oh my God.
And I wondered why I weighed so much.
I wondered why I weighed so much.
I was eating ramen with nacho cheese,
like the cheese you put on nachos,
sour cream, hot sauce, Ritz crackers,
everything I could put into there that tasted good,
macaroni and cheese.
I mean, I would do macaroni and cheese
with ramen.
It was your depression bowl.
It was.
You were sad about the state of the marriage.
I think I was sad about the relationship
because I was eating it during the marriage too.
Yeah, that's what I mean.
I was just there.
So whatever this girl Whitney decides to do
is what Whitney decides to do,
but I just wanted to share that
because you don't have to be ugly. You don't have to be
that ugly. You can spit your ire in other ways. I get it. Write it in your journal. Wack it off.
That's what I do. That's right. I whack it off. Go to the Wacking Tree. Whenever I have an angry day,
like I get angry at a bunch of, and there's been a lot of angry days over the last eight months,
and a lot of people that I'm angry with, and I think rightfully so in some cases, but I just go to the whacking tree.
Go to the whacking tree.
I'm going to the whacking tree to do some whacking.
As my grandfather Papa Joe used to say, write it down, put it on the frisbee and throw it
into the field.
Oh, that's a good idea.
It's gone.
Check your panties.
I have it.
Oh, the world is such a convoluted and complicated place. Okay. Tomorrow, we're going to get
to bad romance novel passages.
Oh, should I be doing some research?
You can if you want to. I got a bunch of them, but if you want to throw a few in the mix,
I'd love to hear it. If you're willing to read them in like a sexy sultry voice, we
should get Rachel to do this actually.
Yeah.
Yeah, because some of these are terrible.
There's an award for this by the way.
They give out an award for the worst sex writing every year
in bad romance novels.
I'll pull out the sexy voice.
Okay, I like that.
I'm gonna pull out my sexy voice too.
That's right, we have to each do.
The deeper it gets, that's right.
The deeper it gets, the more you get wits. The deeper it gets, the more you get wits.
The deeper it gets, the more you get wits.
Oh baby, hey now, I'm gonna do my throat dives.
Oh, bum bum bum, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.
Wow, what's that?
The O face.
I'm gonna, no, my throat dives, remember?
The throat dives.
The throat dives.
The guy with the throat dives?
Yes, yes.
Yeah, I got him on Instagram now.
I love that guy.
Strider, Strider and his throat dives.
Yes.
Oh, I wanna talk about Chappelle Rhone
and I wanna talk about a bunch of stuff.
I guess we'll get to it tomorrow.
Okay. Why not?
All right, okay.
Do you want me to put it in the notebook?
Put it in the notebook.
Here's the deal. September 25th in Orlando, as we had been saying, and then we stopped
saying it. Now we're saying again, September 25th in Orlando, we're back. We're going to
be there and a ticket is going to be on sale soon. So go to the website, tcbpodcast.com.
Find out more information. Make sure you follow us on Instagram at the
commercial break. We'll give you the links to buy those tickets. We're also going to
be doing a Donya point. Donya points. Just north of Miami by Fort Lauderdale. We're going
to be doing that on the 24th. So the 24th and the 25th, the 26th show in Tampa, not
happening for reasons we don't understand but whatever anyway
Probably our fault, but we don't know
So 24th and 25th Donya point then Orlando, please come see us We know a lot of you have already said you're going to so keep on coming. That's all I gotta say keep on planning to come
And do go to the website all the audio all the video right there from one location
You can find everything that you need also two one two four three three three TCB
That's two one two four three three three eight two two in case you needed to know the numbers three eight two two
questions comments concerns contents ideas and youtube.com slash the commercial break
Full episodes and clips Chrissy. That's all I can do for today. I think so.
But I love you.
I love you.
Best to you. Best to you.
And best to you out there in the podcast universe.
Until next time, Chrissy and I always say,
we do say and we must say,
goodbye. Goodbye. I'm gonna be a star I'm gonna be a star
I'm gonna be a star
I'm gonna be a star
I'm gonna be a star
I'm gonna be a star
I'm gonna be a star Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah,