The Commercial Break - She's Good Old Girl
Episode Date: July 21, 2023We're going back to something we know and love... it's Love Connection! Get yourself a good old Tennessee gal and go Black Tie Bowling, because this is going to be a fuzzy, champagne-fueled ride. Bry...an & Krissy are back from vacation! Bryan’s stressed about taking the kids on a plane We found the woman from Love Connection He looks like Kris Kristofferson Bryan & Krissy giving us fake news…Kris Kristofferson is NOT dead Romance…someone who smokes and drinks Bryan swallowed a diaphragm once? Fancy Francy! What does his ass hair look like? Black Tie Bowling This girl’s out here double booking herself! Chuck isn’t asking the follow up questions we deserve So many perms Stickers on the first date She’s a good old gal! Don’t remember most of the date? That’s fine LINKS: Send us show ideas, comments, questions or concerns by texting us or leaving a voicemail at: 1.855.TCB.8383 Speak to TCB LIVE by calling 775.TCB.LIVE (1.775.822.5483) Tuesday-Thursday 12pm-5pm EST Watch TCB on YouTube Creator: Bryan Green Co-Host: Bryan Green Co-Host: Krissy Hoadley Written By: Bryan Green Exec Producers: Bryan Green & Krissy Hoadley Content Production & Research: Tina Khano YouTube Producer & Editor: Morgan Please Audio Editing: Christina A. Executive Director: Astrid B. Associate Producer: Gustavo Episodic Contribution: Marianne, Diane, Natalie, Will The Champ, Will D** Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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Say it with me, I am much smarter than my dating history would lead you to believe.
And one more time. It take your sticker, get in there, take off your clothes. I'm gonna drink this champagne, drive us down about 100 miles through T.O.
Wanda.
I'm gonna bring you to a pony show.
You know what a pony show is?
Read up on it.
I got a pamphlet in the car because you're the star of the pony show.
I knew you was a good old girl.
I knew it.
The next episode of the commercial break starts now.
The next episode of the commercial break starts now. Oh yeah, Kansas kittens.
Welcome back to another episode of the commercial break.
I'm Brian Green.
This is my dear friend and gorgeous co-host, Chris and Joy.
Hold lay best to you, Chris.
Best to you, Ryan.
Best to you out there in the podcast universe.
All right, here we go.
We're round in the corner.
We're round in the corner.
For those of you that don't know, we've been talking about
this all summer, so you should be up to speed now.
Chrissy and I are taking an extended vacation away from the studio, meaning the studio
is dark. If we want to use like official terms, we have a dark studio, which is true even
when we're in the studio, it's a dark studio, because we don't want to shine too much light
on our old skin. I don't want all the wrinkles to show.
But we're taking an extended vacation, but you don't know because we recorded new episodes so that you don't have to suffer through.
Well, now you have to suffer through new episodes. Go back up, listen to the old ones if you're for it. So by the time you hear this, we'll be back from vacation so it will as if no gap had
happened.
But we have been doing a marathon recording session for like the last five or six weeks,
days and a row.
It's unbelievable.
Weekend nights.
Night.
Early mornings, afternoons, children, dogs, friends, delivery people,
moving, jobs, because we need those still.
But it's all happened.
So even the last couple of episodes,
you're hearing a little exhaustion in our voices.
It's because we're quite frankly exhausted.
I gotta be honest, you know, I think I've,
I've made this connection in my head.
For years, I listened to Howard Stern on the series.
Now I have not listened to Howard
with any regularity since we started the show.
And the only reason why is I don't have fucking time.
It's like, I don't have time to listen
to four hours of Stern in the morning.
But one of the things he used to say,
or I guess his staff used to kind of bust on him,
was that Howard would always say,
I need 45 minutes after the show.
I go directly back to my office. There is nothing in my office except a large couch and a desk that has nothing on it.
And that couch is simply for me to sleep on. That's it. I just sleep on it for 45 minutes and I want to quiet outside the door
and I don't want anyone bothering me for any reason whatsoever. I just need that 45 minutes to decompress.
I always thought that was a... now, he does four hours,
which is much different than just doing one.
We do four hours and we get one hour out of it
that we use.
Well, we really do do four hours, but we get two.
Yeah, we get two.
We're here for four hours, we get two episodes out of it
if we're lucky.
And, but I always thought that was a little like,
I was, yeah, you make $100 million a year, bro.
You have to take a 45 minute nap afterwards.
Yes.
You need it.
But now I know.
Now I'm like, you definitely need a nap afterwards.
You know how hard it is?
And I'd say this, you know, white people problems, right?
But I record for, we were in here for four hours,
and then I leave, and then I have all this other stuff to do
It's exhausting like I feel so exhausted right after we get done doing this
Well, it's mentally exhausting really to because you have to be on
Yeah, it's me on
Yeah
Be funny, go ahead and open it
Hey, I thought want to come over here and shirt on my merch.
I'm playing down at the off-board Ray Pony,
schnaack.
Come on down and see me.
I'll be there all week.
The truth.
Rachel gets it.
She said she got it.
She got it.
She understood.
Yes.
Yes.
Yes.
She feels the same way after she gets done.
Yeah.
Yeah. You have to be on. You have to turn your personality into something that absolutely is not. I'm twice as miserable off air. Somebody wrote me in like, I'm like,
something we used to go to bars and do and hang out with every once in a while. I's now turned
into a full time job. I know. But even when you were there, it wasn't like you were on the entire time,
you're just relaxing having some beer. Plus, we had the extra confidence boost of alcohol
and whatever other narcotic we have
and a fall into that night.
So it was just for fun.
Now it's like we now we're contractually obligated
to keep on putting out these episodes.
For no money.
It still makes me laugh and I couldn't imagine doing it
with anyone else.
Well, thanks.
I can't imagine doing it with anybody else but you too.
So as we have kind of, I've noticed just maybe just the last two,
maybe three episodes, I've noticed my own personal exhaustion level has gotten.
I'm at the end of the rope.
I'm ready for a vacation.
Yeah, me too.
So while I'm ready for the vacation when I'm talking right this very second,
in the future when you're hearing this
I'll be ready to come back from my vacation
And that already makes me sad. I'm already sad in the future
I'm sad for my future self who's gonna be hearing this on the way home from his extended vacation
But you know you got it you got to do it. You got to take a little time off
You have to mental breaks. Yeah, mental breaks.
So I can go take 13 to 17 children on an airplane
for 68 hours.
Oh my God.
That's a whole other kind of being on.
I know.
I actually had a whole therapy session.
You have to be responsible for their safety.
I know.
Care.
Poor kids.
They don't know, they don't know just how neglected they are.
Not yet, don't realize that in therapy someday.
I actually had a whole therapy session
about taking the kids on a plane.
It was like my therapist was calming me
before we even got into,
before we even thought about getting on the plane,
she was calming me down.
Because I could all worked up.
I'm like,
I'm gonna be the one asshole, what's that?
Did she give you some tactics?
Yeah, she said you fucking paid for the ticket too.
That's what she said.
She goes, you paid for the ticket.
It's only X amount of hours.
You'll live, they'll survive it.
Everybody will live.
Braiding exercises help, they do.
Yeah, I wish the kids could do the beginning exercise.
And that's also, I actually have taught them
the reading exercises, but it doesn't seem
to work in most situations.
They'll take a deep breath and then they'll scream
on the way out.
Like one of my daughters is like,
ah, my, you know,
her pinky is gone, right? And I'm like, it's okay. It's okay. Take a deep breath. Let's
breathe through it. It's okay to feel the feels, but let's take a deep breath so we can,
you know, recognize. And she's like
And then I got all worked up, but I'm like, where's the fucking baking?
Where's pinky where's bonky and they all have different names pinky and bonky and donkey and I'm like, where are they?
They're in the wash
Not laundry day, no! Please, why today?
Here's the craziest thing.
One of my daughters, the cutest little girl you've had
in the first year.
She is.
She's freaking out, right?
Uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh,
Chupa, Chupa, whatever, you know, pacifier, Chupa!
And I'm like, ah, where's a Chupa? So now we're both freaking out, looking for the Chupa, chupa, whatever, you know, pacifier, chupa. And I'm like, ah, where's the chupa?
So now we're both freaking out,
looking for the chupa under the bed
over the things all over the place.
There's only like 10 of them around here.
I can spy, so right now.
Yeah, they're all on the floor,
the dog's shat on them, whatever.
There's like, there's a million of them,
you just can't find them when you need them.
Of course.
And so now I'm freaking out.
Now I'm like, where's that damn chupa?
God damn it, what I put that chupa.
And my daughter turns to me and she goes,
daddy, deep weed.
And I was like, what?
And she goes, deep weed.
And when your daughter is turning your calming tactics back on you,
she got you.
That's good.
That's why daughters wrap their, their, their daddy's
right around their finger.
Oh yeah, you're gonna have your hands full with her. Oh my god. I mean, both your dogs. You are all of them.
Yeah, all of them. You might need to just go ahead and start talking to your future self.
I felt that I'm talking to my future self. And I'm saying as soon as I can get down to
the villages, the better, the sooner the better. I'll retire at 50. I'll go down to those
villages. And you know, I'll get my six-year-old
a plane ticket ever going so well to come visit me. Come down to the villages. I'll drive
around in my golf cart with my Trump flag hanging out the back.
Nice. Or not nice. One of the two. All right, so let's just do what we know to do.
Let's have some fun.
Let's not overstress or overanalyze the situation.
I would love to just do something that we know and love.
No, we do know and love this.
Do you see me?
Hey everybody, it's your favorite part of the show, where I pine for more of your attention. First way, you can help fill this hole in my soul, go to Apple, and leave a sub-positive
review.
It takes two seconds out of your day, and it really does help grow the show.
But there's no quid pro quo here.
You don't have to give us anything to get something for free.
Go to tcbpodcast.com, hit the contact us button and send us your physical address. We'll send you a 21-EPM sticker directly
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Visit our sponsor's websites, buy their products if you're in the market for them and always use our specialized URLs or codes when in if you can. They pay our bills and
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and then we'll be back to this episode of The Commercial Brink.
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A thug commercial break. I'm not a bad guy.
I'm a bad guy.
I'm a bad guy.
I'm a bad guy.
I'm a bad guy.
I'm a bad guy. I'm a bad guy. Branden underbird, Brad Gunderberg. Yes, yes. So more information to come about him.
Don't think we've let that go quite yet
because we have, we may have one of the biggest surprises
in commercial break history.
May have one of the biggest surprises
in commercial break history.
I'm not going to write it down.
Don't write it down because it will never happen.
Yeah, but we have one of our lovely,
I call them content producers.
One of our content producers has possibly identified and found
the woman who went on the date
with brad grunberg
and turned into such a disaster where he claimed they went one place and she said
it never happened
like the clearly the most strange is
episode of the love connection we've ever seen
but she our content producer may have found that lady and that lady
may be coming on the commercial break.
Oh my God.
Everyone keep a fingers crossed.
By the time we get back from vacation, we will know.
So without further ado, I'll show it on the internet as I do and I found a love connection
episode along with the Brad Grunberg.
Let's do it.
Let's just go to the well.
To the well.
It's almost dry. Oh, it's totally dry.
When we started six weeks ago, yeah, I had about 70 gigs of videos that we could do. I've got about 30 left
realizing they were no good for the commercial break in the first place and we have gone through the other 40.
This is it. We're one last drop of content for my good friends.
We shouldn't be bitching and complaining about this.
We got the best job in the world.
Absolutely.
Sorry, we're just a little tired.
That's what happens when we have two old white people
doing a podcast.
They get tired really easy.
All right, here we go.
Love connection.
This is friends.
She of course is ready for marriage again.
Which one of these men did she choose?
Which one of our audience choose?
And this is Charles.
He likes women with smooth skin, long legs, and loving eyes.
We showed you videos.
It looks like Charles is Chris Christophe.
He looks exactly like Chris Christophe.
I can't even imagine.
Yeah, the faint, the, why is Chris Christophe
is in famous exactly?
What did he write?
He just died recently. I know. exactly what did he just died recently?
I know but what he wrote to me and Bobby McGee and Bobby McGee and that was
and that was the
Janice joblin hit didn't he write a dead song or two to yeah he's written a lot did he write you
ah so beautiful to me I know he didn't sing it but did he write it was that Bob Seagrard that sang it because not Bob Seagrard. It was Joe Cocker Joe. Joe Cocker Joe Cocker
I watched the whole documentary on him side. Yes, it was really good
But I realized that he never wrote anything. He only sang cover songs. Yeah, that was it
Yeah, his voice was so
Gravel Chris Christopher's and that wrote that
His because his other biggest hit was a beat of song wasn't it?
It was
Yeah
Little hell from my friends. I don't
My friends I'm having a seizure on stage
Hell from my friend. I'm having a seizure on stage. Have a little hell
Would you do if I sing?
I don't do would you stand up and walk out on me?
You are so beautiful is one of the most beautiful songs ever. Yeah, but that voice is like unexpected. I remember hearing that song on the radio
for the first time, it was like a little kid.
It was like, you are so beautiful.
Yeah, Chris Christopherson though,
has written a lot more songs than he realized
for other people, or he, he wrote them and performed them
and then other people covered them
and made them more famous.
Yeah, well, sometimes you're the conductor,
and sometimes you're the cold guy.
I don't even know what that means,
but it sounded good.
Sometimes you're the writer.
Yeah, sometimes you're the host of the commercial break,
and sometimes the commercial break is the host of you.
It's like, sometimes the tail is wagging the dog
as they used to say.
And sometimes Chuck Willary is Chuck Willary.
And sometimes Chuck Willary's an asshole?
Yeah, what the fuck, Chuck?
What the fuck, Chuck?
And then other times, he's just the guy
hosting the love connection.
It's a beast, three women.
Oh, by the way, while we're getting on this,
you know, what's his name is,
Pat SayJack is retiring from the wheel
of fortune we talked about that.
I wrote this article and I forget
what it was in the Atlantic,
or I forget Rolling Stone, something like that.
Like Pat Sejak was always an asshole. It's time to admit it and I was like, wow, okay. All right.
He probably had it ego.
Well, he only worked 42, he only works 42 days a year. Did you know that?
The wheel of fortune, he gets paid 15 to 20 million dollars and he works days a year, and they record like four episodes in a day.
So he works like five hour days.
Is that unbelievable?
Is that unbelievable?
Is that unbelievable?
Yeah, well, of course it's Ryan Seacrest
that's probably gonna be hosting that.
Oh, that's true.
That's what they're saying.
Yeah, why is Ryan Seacrest?
Why the fuck does Ryan Seacrest get everything?
He's everywhere.
He has like the dick clerk of our time.
No, he isn't.
He even took over dick clerk.
I know, he owns dick clerk productions. Yeah. Yeah, something's't. He even took over dick clerk. I know. He owns dick clerk productions.
I yeah, something's got.
Why is Seacrest? You know he grew up here.
Yeah, I do. He's like down the street.
Yeah.
And he picked one of his days.
Which one did he choose?
Which one of our audience to today on love connection?
You'll find out who they picked, who the audience picked and everything that happened on the dates.
Now here to tell us more about love Connection is our host Chuck Walraise.
By the way, this is one of the first episodes of Love Connection.
There's a little just going back to Chris Christoffer's song.
Oh, Chris Christoffer's song. Me and Bobby McGee,
Sunday morning coming down,
helped me make it through the night.
Okay, yeah, he had
He wrote a lot of songs
He wrote a lot of songs
Okay, good for him. And Jesus was a Capricorn what song? Jesus was a
Know that one. No, you do you know that?
Okay, it's very good. Okay, all right.
Welcome to the show.
Now there are more than 60 million single adults in the United States.
So here on Love Connection, we've got a new way for singles to meet.
Here's how it works.
We've compiled a videotape library of hundreds of attractive and available single people.
We select some of those singles and we show them three videotapes.
After they've watched the tapes, they choose the one they're most attracted to and go out on a date. Then they come here and they
tell us what happened on their date. So, again, let's meet a woman who selected the date. We show
them video tapes, the brand new technology from RCA. Our video library, she's a native California.
She says she's irresponsible, loves to be in love. Please welcome Branson. Yeah, she's irresponsible and loves to be in love. Okay.
She's also divorced. Yeah, maybe because she was so irresponsible. She left her children outside without without
Yeah, you know, when you're responsible generally things don't go great for you I'm not going to be able to do that. I'm not going to be able to do that. I'm not going to be able to do that. I'm not going to be able to do that.
I'm not going to be able to do that.
I'm not going to be able to do that.
I'm not going to be able to do that.
I'm not going to be able to do that.
I'm not going to be able to do that.
I'm not going to be able to do that.
I'm not going to be able to do that.
I'm not going to be able to do that.
I'm not going to be able to do that. I'm what does it take you to fall in love, francy?
I need something really romantic, someone that smokes and drinks cigarettes and this is
the...
What?
Ah!
Hey!
That word, like a rock star.
Like Chris Kerr's offer said.
Or Joe Cocker.
That guy ate an ass tray before he went on stage.
Yeah, sure.
Why not?
And James Scott doesn't can lift you.
And can lift you?
Did you, now you're divorced, yes?
I'm divorced.
And Francy won't win wrong.
One day he would want to be a movie star in the next day.
He'd want to make a mortar in the next day.
And he'd want to be a producer and a meatman. Each He'd want to make mortar and the next day And I want to be a producer and a meat man
Each week you see an ad and a meat man a meat man. I get the director and producer, but
Meat man. I'd also like to be a meat man
Hi
Hello, it's Joe and I just wanted to know if you have a meat man yet.
You don't?
Well, let me tell you about my services.
I hand deliver my large and in my large in girth and in length, size, sausages directly
to your vagina.
Would you like that?
Are you divorced because you're irresponsible?
I'm the meat man for you.
There you go.
He would want to be a movie star on the next day. He'd want to make mortar on the next day.
And he'd want to be a producer on a meat man. He'd see an ad and that's what he want to be.
He would see an ad. It's kind of like me.
Yeah, I'd see an ad for something. I's kinda like me. Yeah, I'd like to see an ad for something,
and I'm like, let me go do that.
Commercial real estate sounds great.
Regular real estate, no problem.
Search engine optimization.
Yay.
Thanks for coming.
We know a little bit more about you.
I'm gonna say something here.
We're gonna show you a portion of the tapes
that Francis saw.
Now you pay attention, okay,
because you're going to get the vote again. Don't tell me what to do Chuck. What the fuck Chuck?
First there was Marty. He was raised in Cleveland
He says it's Simon Garconkel. Yes, it is Simon Carbunkel our bunkel
My god, bunkles are killing that a perm or is that his hair? Oh, that's a perm.
It is, for sure.
You know what it is.
Yeah.
Likes to chase women and here's one reason
that he's never been married.
He likes to chase women.
Yeah.
He had to point that out.
He's on a dating show.
She's irresponsible.
He likes to chase women.
He likes to chase women.
Boom.
And why does everybody...
Why does it seem like anybody who was born between
1940 and 1980 looks twice their age
He's 33 he looks 57. It's not crazy. I
What the sun. I don't think it's the sun
I think it's that people didn't live as long back then so you just aged quicker
They are three meaningful relationships. I think I've been in love once
my being in love was
simultaneously beautiful and very frustrating
It was with a married woman
You don't say One time for once
Is 33 the one time the one time he was in love it was with a married one. Yeah. Yeah, maybe it was her
If there he's easy responsible
He's lost angel. why does everybody have a
perm but all these guys have a perm it was the style back then oh man Bob
Ross had one yeah he did he had the he had the perm of all poems Bob Ross
look good and I in a person yeah I would have had a perm I could have a
perm if I grew my hair out only no one likes a perm that starts halfway at
the back of your head. He's been telling this daughter and he says he's not into the single scene.
I don't think I've ever met somebody in a bar.
We've once or twice. I don't think I am looking all that hard.
I think I could look harder, but I've been through periods when I looked very hard and didn't come away any better.
What? What?
What?
What?
How was trying to pay attention, but I don't know what he said.
I mean, about many people in a bar row, maybe a couple times a minute.
A man?
What's that?
He's, yeah, looking harder.
How do you look harder?
Is it just like you look closer?
Like you stare at some girl's tits at the bar?
You're like, I'm sorry, I'm looking harder for love.
I'm harder right now, actually.
Okay, and finally you watched Eric now.
He was raised in the...
That's what my hair would look like if I grew it out.
Ha ha ha ha.
A perm that started halfway in the back of your head.
York City likes to gamble.
Sometimes it gets snorkeling.
He is the long lost BG.
Yeah.
Eric BG.
Over those guys.
He's a magazine writer.
Oh, he is.
I wonder if he's written anything we've read.
Probably not.
He's 34 going on 70.
He swallowed a girl's earring.
He lost that there for a second. He accidentally swallowed a girl's earring. He lost that there for a second.
He accidentally swallowed a girl's earring.
I guess it was making out maybe, and get into the neck earlobe.
Oh, he's sucking in the earlobe and he swallowed in earring.
He isn't said it.
Yeah, but that's the only thing I can imagine happened.
I swallowed a diaphragm once.
There's no way to inhale in there.
I don't even know what to say.
It was a long night. You don't want even know. I don't even know. It was a long time.
You don't want to know.
He's from Los Angeles.
He's been in time with his daughter.
And he says he's not into the single scene.
Oh, why did I go backwards?
Sorry about that.
I just don't get the hair styles going on back then.
It was the style.
OK.
I was in the family. And. I didn't stop because I'm too well-mattered for that.
I'm too well-managed to stop and let the girl know you're choking on her earring. I have
an intentional puncture because of earring. I would go right to the hospital. Yeah. Sorry about that. Diamond earring. Your
grandma gave you. Right. You have any met him useful? Before we find out who France
he chose is their day. Let's see all three of them again. Okay. First there was Marty.
Now he's 33. He's a musician. And then there's Mark. He's a 35 year old attorney and finally Eric. He's a publisher. He's 34
And this is where you do it audience. It's time to vote again. Now who do you think is the best date for France?
Here in the studio at home, please make your choice now.
Could you use the call and or something from home? Yeah, you could use to call in and from home
I think when it was a local Los Angeles show, you could call in and give your opinion.
Right after this break, we're going to find out who Francy selected and everything that happened on her dates.
You stayed to, okay?
Francie's a name you don't hear much anymore. No.
Okay, we're back. Francie, who did you select?
I selected Rick.
Okay, now in love connects us, we always hear both sides of you.
See, if I could, I could rock that hairstyle.
Okay, he smokes and drinks.
Does this look?
Everybody smoked and drank in 1979 or 80 or what, 82 or whatever this is.
He looks like the world's hairiest man.
Yeah, I feel like he's got a lot of ass hair coming out of his ass.
I don't know why I thought about that, but the first thing I look at, the first thing I
think about when I look at a man's head of hair is I go, I wonder what his ass hair looks
like.
Oh, nice.
Great.
And Rick is backstage, and we're going to say a little Rick stop.
Rick?
How you doing?
Hi, how are you?
Good.
I thought you just been asked, uh,
uh, Francis something here.
Why did you pick Eric?
I picked him because he was a tallest.
And he sounded really funny.
I love that you're in-store-athlete
where things were really small.
I did too.
What was your first year of work?
Interesting lady with an interesting idea for a date.
I was intrigued.
Why don't you tell us about your date?
I said, let's go buy a cotton cigarette,
a bottle of rum, and a diaphragm, and we'll get to action.
I'm completely irresponsible.
Such a creative idea.
I ran to the limousine.
Whoa.
Called him up, and I said, OK, I'll meet you
in front of a bowling alley in the valley.
And you're supposed to wear a black tie.
Tuxedo.
Tuxedo.
And he said, all right, and I called my name.
This is a sport.
Master.
He's a good person.
You love a sport.
So we drove up to the bowling alley where he's
supposed to be.
Right, in your limo.
In my limo, he didn't know about the limo.
No.
So we drive up and I see my date standing at this porno bookstore.
Oh, good.
At the porno bookstore?
Oh, that's the way to get the party started.
Yeah.
There's nothing like revving up the engine before you actually get the green light.
Right.
You know what I'm saying?
That's what I like to do before my day.
It's just flip through a little bit of porn.
Yeah.
You can make sure my dick still works.
Yeah.
Oh, thanks.
You're great.
You're great.
Oh, I know.
I was like, give me a second.
OK, so you get there.
What happens next?
So then my Lambo driver opened the drawer.
And he said, you know, he told Rick that I was the person.
And I think he opened the door and I said,
champagne.
You know, really?
You know, it was nice.
You know, it was nice.
And it looked like plastic glasses.
Yeah.
It was great.
So he came into my room and he was saying,
and we talked and knew.
What did you have on that?
You had a tuxedo.
What did you have on Rick?
You know, the nice point about her after was she had a hat
with a veil on.
It was very, yeah. it just fit the scene.
Yeah, I look at the veil.
Huh, interesting.
This girl sounds like the kind of girl we would party with.
You know what I'm thinking?
You know what I'm saying?
Well, also, I'm either thinking she's got family money or her husband, she just divorced
left her a bunch of money because I mean, back in those days, they're rent.
A limbo?
Thousands of dollars. And champagne. pack in those days to rent. They quit. A limo?
Thousands of dollars.
Champagne all of that.
Back in these days.
Yeah.
I'm trying to find a ride to the airport,
so I looked up limo, and I quickly realized,
that's well outside the commercial break, pay grade.
We're gonna have to get another four contracts
before that happens.
Yeah, I'm not understanding what's so fantastic
about this date.
I mean, a limo is a novelty then certainly. Yeah, it's still a novelty
I guess in a lot of ways you you don't see many of them out on the road anymore. Well now I read a article about it
They've for everything's been replaced with the big suburban. Yeah, because it's the best way to get it
Because you know, let's trade one gas-cuzzling machine for another gas-cuzzling machine
People were talking about like trying to make turns. It's impassive.
Yeah, getting on and off the inner state.
It's just a recipe for disaster.
And then they had the couple one, like a few limo companies
would have the kind with the hot tub in the back.
Yeah, it's taken it a little bit too far.
There's a story that you can read.
I don't forget, Google it.
World's largest limousine that someone built
and it drove one time
Down and decommissioned to aircraft
Landing strip because it couldn't make turns it couldn't turn anywhere
So just drove down a mile and it backed up a mile and that was it. That's all it did
But it was like 90 feet long
So imagine this almost the size that like the length of this house,
having a limousine that big.
Stupid.
Well, it's stupid until you have as many kids as I do.
And you're like, God, I wish they still made
those 90 foot limousines.
That way I could sit in the back
and my 20 kids could be a front.
I still might not be able to hear them.
I'm joking, the beach.
Go to the beach.
And that was it.
That was it.
That's all they did. Go to the beach. That was it. That was it. That's all he did. Go to the beach.
I just drove. I was really, I had to paint crackers and cheese. So I kept giving
cheese to the driver. He's really three of us actually. The driver was quite a nice guy.
There were three of us.
What I tell you about three sums guys. What did I tell you about three Sims guys?
What did I tell you about three Sims?
But I guess, when you have a hunk of a limo driver, hey you want some champagne?
Yeah, I know you're driving, it's all good.
We're irresponsible.
Hey look, three-semino box.
I'm a long dress. Yes.
So we're walking up a lighthouse and high heels and long dress.
Yes.
I'm taking pictures.
You were just so adorable.
Yeah, it was so unmemorable.
What time?
I'm not alone.
It's not like she ever thought the dress coming here.
Wait, over thought the dress code here.
Yeah, because if the limo fine, champagne fine.
Cheese, maybe the three some with the limo driver.
But you go to the beach.
You don't want to be wearing a tuxedo
in a long dress with a veil.
And then go up a lighthouse.
Now, now stick with the lighthouse.
Like wear some jeans, go up to the lighthouse,
fuck the limo driver
Come back down. Yeah tell your day to hang on a few minutes drink some champagne and have some cocaine because I'm sure that was somewhere in the
Mixed oh yeah 1982
cocaine is like I don't know like way protein is now
I'm, it ate.
Good morning?
Oh, what?
But I mean, it did for two hours.
Eight to ten.
It takes longer to get warmed up.
I mean, you have to do the guy who ate earrings on the woman's ear.
What happened?
I wasn't hungry.
I was hungry.
I'm hungry.
I'm hungry.
I'm hungry. I bet you weren't hungry. It'm not hungry. I'm not hungry.
I bet you weren't hungry.
It's too much of that.
Columbia and marching powder.
I had a date of 1030.
Oh, that's how I had a date of 1030.
Okay, let's take a look at this.
She had a date at 1030.
What?
What?
And Chuck, where's the follow-up question on that one?
Yeah.
Yeah, dude, I realize it's early days,
but you got as a human being.
Don't you want to know that's part of what frustrates me sometimes about Chuck.
And rewatching all of these episodes is that I realize that Chuck is not going with the follow-up
question. He let so much stuff slide. Yeah. That would have been juicy information to know in the
moment and now it's lost forever. It's uncelluloid without a follow-up question.
It's uncelluloid without a follow-up question. Marty 56% yeah.
Yeah.
56% okay now here's the deal.
All right.
If you follow the audience's advice, we'll send you out on another date.
No.
What Marty?
You want to do that?
No.
He's too short and he's just got weird ideas.
Well listen, I want to thank you Rick.
Thank you very much for.
Well, that's a great idea to the date.
Yeah.
So what do you mean?
I mean, once it get first of all, she said she had another date at 10.30.
At 10.30.
That needs attention.
Yeah.
I need to know more about that.
Also, what happened at the end of this date?
We don't know.
That's the problem with this particular version of the show.
It just went like limo drivers done.
Limo driver done at 10 pm.
He's too short as weird ideas,
but how did you get to come to all those conclusions?
Isn't there any detail in there?
This is the beginning pioneering of this kind of blind
dating TV show and Chuck doesn't,
Chuck and the producers, yeah, what the fuck Chuck?
They don't know where to take it.
It's like just being born, you're fumbling out there
in the darkness, hoping you can figure it out
Nice gift for you. Maybe we'll see you again
Okay, by the way, we have a nice gift for you
What happened we have no idea.
They're not going back out, I guess.
Nope.
Nope.
They're not going back out because she just said I don't want to take him out.
He's too weird.
He's too short.
No, that was the guy that the audience chose.
Oh.
Oh, well why didn't she say do you want to go on it?
Maybe this is maybe it's so early that they don't even offer the second date.
Okay, well back this time let's see the man who chose a date from our the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the to your old bartender because he looks like Chris Chris so old she's thirty five
check just that he looks like Chris
Christchurch
oh he did oh let's check that out again
the California says that women
often approach him because he
looks like Chris Christchurch
in the show
oh please welcome
Charles Costa
yeah that's awesome
oh
he's kind of a dead ranger
what's that he's a dead ranger
yeah he's a he's a doppelganger
for sure all right you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you I wonder if Chuck is being honest there or he just saw him one time. Yeah.
You know, Hollywood, a hotel or whatever it is.
The Hollywood Inn.
The Playboy Mansion.
Right.
You probably hear this all the time, okay?
Yeah, it's absolutely incredible being a bartender.
I hear it probably 10,000 times a year.
You get a lot of dates just because you look like Chris.
Well, yeah, I get to be selected.
That's the women. Oh, well, I get to be selective. That's the woman.
Oh, well, that's why I'm on this show.
The little mind of a dude.
Yeah, that's why I'm on this show is because I have 10,000 dates
over a year.
Jackass.
What do they do when they find out you're not?
Obviously, some of them think you are all different places.
Obviously, people think I am, but the places are.
But after I fuck them, I tell them I'm not.
Right. And I ask them if they have any money for the hotel room.
Hahaha.
Hahaha.
By the way, I'm not Chris Christopherson.
Look at my credit card.
It doesn't say Chris Christopherson.
And it's Magstyle.
And it's not going to work.
It's, uh, it's expired by two months.
Hang out, aren't the places that Christopherson hangs out?
Does it tell?
Oh, definitely. It's going to be a good day. It's going to be a good day. Look, I tell you what, we're going to show you a portion Hang out aren't the place to sit. Just stop, some hangs out. Does it help? Definitely.
Look, I tell you what, we're going to show you a portion of the tapes and Charles saw
so watch closely because you're going to get to vote again.
Okay, first there was Barbara.
As she's from Chicago, she's a marathon walker who likes to eat.
A marathon walker.
33 going on 60.
These people look so old.
She's got a big perm too.
Oh yeah, she's a ginger perm nonetheless.
She's pretty.
Mine being alone sometimes.
I don't feel the need to be out with a man
every single night of my life.
I enjoy being by myself.
I'm very selective.
And when I like somebody, I like them a lot.
And it's me and my two cats, punks and toonses.
We're just fine on our own.
That's why I'm on the show. That's why I'm on the show that's why I'm on the show my mom told me I should come
There's somebody very special that I can have long conversations with and and do you know the things that I enjoy doing
Next there was Suzanne now she's from Tennessee. She likes bicycle riding and long weekends
And here's something else. Oh, please let it be Suzanne. Please let it be Suzanne
I can already tell by the look on Suzanne's face she's the party animal we
need on this show she likes long weekends yes and long conversations why does
everybody like long conversations what's so interesting about that I like
short conversations I like I like Harry men you know a little bit I don't
know why it's just how it came in like thing
It's all like dirty thing
If they're if they're you know construction workers something you know
Pounding and you get away
She was Ray Harry knuckles geez in the Midwest. She's bodybuilder who enjoys all sports. And here's the
... Wow. Isn't Harry Knuckles what happens when you masturbate too much? That's the old
wives tale. Kind of a man who is funerals. Someone who talks to you, but talks right
through you, like they want to look at someone else while they're talking to you or someone that talks about their old girlfriend or someone else another female,
you know like you aren't even there. Now before we find out who Charles is.
You're from the wrong people. Yeah, you're going out of the wrong chicks, dudes.
I hope it's a bit of a decision. I hope so. Let's take a look at all three of them again. Okay.
First there was Barbara, she's a 33 year old production coordinator. Why is there so much overviewing
here? We already took a look at the three. Why do we have to take a look at the three again?
Yeah. Just right there. It's as if our brains advanced like 80 years in a 30 year time period,
because we don't need to review what we just reviewed. No, I got it. My attention span is not that bad.
to review what we just reviewed. I got it.
My attention span is not that bad.
In Suzanne, she's a credit analyst, and she's 27.
Finally Denise, she's a 27-year-old hair stylist.
Okay, audience, time to vote again.
I'm going to think it's the best lady for Charles.
Yeah, flash bodybuilder.
Flash, slash.
So here in the studio and at home, too,
please make your choice right now, okay?
We're going to find out who the audience chose in just a moment.
First, let's find out who Charles chose.
OK?
He chose Susanne.
Wow.
Susanne.
Oh, that's right.
Yep.
So you always hit the side of the score.
And she goes backstage.
So let's welcome Susanne Blackburn.
Nice to meet you.
You all right?
Nice to meet you.
Nice to meet you.
Oh, which camera?
I got it.
She's looking all over the place.
She can do it.
What's camera? This is my first time seeing a TV
Okay, all right, why'd you choose Suzanne for it?
I'll get back to you just a moment. Okay sweet tits. You sit your pretty little ass down there
Don't just give a giant. I don't be a minute
This reasons I knew Suzanne was a good ol gal. It's like sorry, you know, I'm getting from Ken as the
New season good ol' gal, as soon as I saw her, you know, getting from Tennessee. I knew she was a good ol' gal. All right, we'll try to understand the feeling. Charles, thanks for your good ol' gal, Suzanne. What was your first impression of him never
singing before? Well, I talked to him on the phone and he was a really nice guy. I was
really easy to talk to. I think we talked for about an hour. Oh, good. So you liked him?
Yes. I did. No more time for your part of the story.
Yeah.
Let's move on.
I'd like to know if I'm one.
Would you say a thing on when you first saw him?
First time I saw him, I told him,
you look like Chris Thomas.
That was about your day, Joe.
Well, let's see, first, I went to pick her up,
and I had a sheet of stickers.
I got your hands first stickers.
They had some liquid LSD on them. I thought I would get the party started right off the bat.
Well which which wind you want you know they said all kinds of things like I love the
Raiders I love the Dodgers I love this I love that and she came to the ones that I love you
that's the one she picked up. Oh this is. You got to know that. Stickers to the first date.
Bring in stickers to the first date.
21 EPM.
Show me your body.
What would Frankie do?
You choose.
That's right.
Mediocre.
Yeah.
It was sweet.
Man, I thought that was a real good getting off point right there.
I was just really lucky right off. Yeah, I did. You must have really liked it right off of that.
Yeah, I did. Usually some people you like and right away I liked him.
He was really nice.
He's a gentleman to the whole day and I've had a really good time.
Southern girls, boys, they're so sweet.
What happened next?
They would joke about...
Chuck.
Chuck.
You're being a little bit of a douche.
The Dodger Stadium got our place to park.
And it says, well, Stein for breakfast.
With a ballgame, sure.
Dodger Stadium.
So I got in the trunk and whipped out a bottle of champagne
and we had breakfast.
Called Taylor, we parked in.
Where else happens to it?
The truck.
The trunk.
He said the trunk.
I thought he said trunk.
He whipped out the trunk.
Get in.
I knew you, good old girl.
I knew you was.
It take your sticker, get in there.
Take off your clothes.
I'm gonna drink this champagne.
Drive us down about a hundred miles through Tijuana.
I'm gonna bring you to a pony show.
You know what a pony show is?
Well, you better read up on it.
I got a pamphlet in the car
because you're the star of the pony show. I knew he's a good old girl. I knew it.
Well, after a few drinks at the Tardir remember exactly. No, then we went to the game and
we got into a conversation with some gentleman in front of it or rather he did. I don't remember.
And then she went to the bathroom.
She's well.
So we're going to stay in the night. So we had. Yes, we've been to a couple of baseball games that we don't remember either.
And I would tell you the story, but I don't remember.
We don't do. We don't know.
Everybody,
mainly security guards and police officers but.
And the ladies behind us in the row behind us, you know, they have their two little
daughters and they wanted to get their picture taken with me and sign their
programs and all that stuff. So I blogged by signing my own name. No good. And she
came back and I was trying to watch the ball game out of my left eye and listen to
her talk in my right ear. And she talked quite a bit. Of course I knew she would because I knew she is a good ol' gal.
What? I knew it. So I knew it. They walk, get a good shit, bread and dirt.
I wish they all could be from Southern Tennessee.
Get all the girls could be from Tennessee.
Who's in? What happened then?
Well, I he got...
How was the ball game? Do you like the ball game?
I don't remember a lot of the ball games.
That it was a lot of fun.
We went back to...
It was a lot of fun you didn't remember?
I was gonna say I think it was.
He told me it was.
I think she's trying to save herself from someone embarrassment coming up.
On my house.
And spend a couple hours
Really, what's else about that
Well, we were both tired by the time we got there and so we just kind of
Dozed off there. I just kind of lie down and take a little nap. Yeah
There it ended there yeah
Ended there I finished I told her to clean up after me and I went home I knew she's
good old gal I said we do me a favor and wash my penny panties for me that I went home just
early after that was sleep and woke up and I'm saying it says something like that I
do you guys have a great team? I can actually see who the audience picked.
Let's see if they had a good taste.
All right, let's take a look over here, the monitor and see.
This is back when they actually did the numbers by the hand.
Yeah, they're running the numbers by hand.
They picked her.
Good for them.
Yep.
That's the picture.
That's the picture.
That's the picture.
Alright.
Alright.
Well, we picked up the tab for the first date.
We'd like to pick up the tab for the second date.
If you'd like to see us in, how again?
Oh, I'd love to.
Chuck, thanks for all your questions.
I was able to do it.
Oh, I'd love to take her again in my trunk to the baseball game that she doesn't remember and finish
on her two or three hours after the baseball game at her own house.
And then I'll leave because she's a good old gal.
Well, come on out here and join us on stage.
Well, there you go, alls well, that ends well.
You're a good old gal too ain't you Chrissy?
You're from Tennessee.
We did it, we made it!
Six straight weeks.
Many episodes, too many episodes to count.
We love you.
We'll be back next episode, fresh face that's ready to go.
Oh man, we love you.
You'll be moved.
I'll be tan.
Not like I'm not tan right now, but I'll be tan more.
I'll be more tan than I am already.
And we will survive.
Even if we have to commandeer the plane to get us there,
we're gonna figure that out.
I'm anxious to hear.
Send me a, uh...
I'm anxious to be anxious about it.
So there you go.
Send me a, uh, you know,
a text that you've got there safely.
I will send you a text that I got there safely,
for sure.
We'll send all kind of pictures.
There's one thing you do when you have a lot of children,
it's take a lot of pictures,
and they're all of the children.
Yeah. Because you never want to miss a moment.
So you say, oh, rather than not miss the moment, let me miss the moment now, I'll take
a picture and then I'll remember it later.
That's what you do.
It's the most ridiculous thing in the world, but hey, it's 2023.
That's the way we roll.
All right, listen.
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That's all the audio, all the video right from one location,
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That would be most grateful. We would be most grateful. Okay, Chrissy. That's all I can do for this month
Okay, so I love you best you best you out there in the podcast universe until we return from vacation
Which is next time in episode comes we must say we do say we will say goodbye I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, a city, I'm a city, a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a city, I'm a Thank you.