The Commercial Break - TCB Infomercial w. Margaret Cho

Episode Date: March 26, 2024

The legend that is Margaret Cho joins Bryan & Krissy for a TCB Infomercial. Top 50 stand up comics of all time Women should have rights The you be you community The worst thing Margaret has ever tasted Soursop & stink fruit Still bombing Watching comedy with her dad The musicality of comedy Margaret’s upbringing Kink as a way to not spread HIV Being a bad dominatrix The kinkiest kink! A penis basketball Her current tour Lucia! MARGARET CHO: https://margaretcho.com/ Tour Watch her be your dream gyno on Life & Beth on Hulu LINKS: Send us show ideas, comments, questions or concerns by texting us   212.433.3TCB text or leave us a voicemail Watch TCB on YouTube Creator: Bryan Green Co-Host: Bryan Green Co-Host: Krissy Hoadley Producer: Christina A.  Producer: Gustavo B. To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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What day of the week do you look forward to most? Well, it should be Wednesday. Ahem, Wednesday. Why, you wonder? Whopper Wednesday, of course. When you can get a great deal on a whopper. Flame grilled and made your whay. And you won't want to miss it.

So make every Wednesday a whopper Wednesday. Only at Burger King, where you rule. But in the 80s, I was a straight up dyke and it was different then. I mean, we didn't have Queer Eye. We didn't have anything like that. You know, and it was different then. I mean, we didn't have Queer Eye. You know, we didn't have anything like that, you know. And it was dangerous to be gay. And it was very hard.

It was like the 80s. And I was like, I'm gay! I'm gay! I had like really heavy boots and like cargo pants with lots of shit in the pockets, like carabiners and D-rings and measuring tape. Lesbians just like to hook shit on other shit. It starts with a fucking friendship bracelet and then hook in one thing to another thing

and then it's a U-Haul. On this episode of The Commercial Break... Were you Dominatrix for a while also? On this episode of the commercial break. That's the worst. Yeah, like I'm like a real like Okay, like I just don't have what it takes to be a good dog The next episode of the commercial break starts now This is Ryan Green, this is the Minister of Justice, Kristen Joy Hoedlick. Best to you, Kristen. Best to you, Ryan. And best to you out there in the podcast universe.

My microphone just did a hiccup. I don't know what happened there. Uh-oh. Has it been drinking? The studio is now falling apart. We got it all together just in time for two weeks of perfectness, and now it's all gonna start falling apart.

We don't have the money to recover. So we may be doing a, I don't know, we'll probably. We'll go back to the basics. Like when we first started. We'll go back to the basics. Maybe my microphone stand is breaking and I'll take my flashlight and I'll just hang it from here and we'll stick the microphone in the vagina,

if it'll fit. The great Margaret Cho is here today. What an honor to have someone named one of the top 50 standup comics of all time by Rolling Stone. If you know, you know. It's hard not to know Margaret Cho, the notorious CHO. And I'm so just starstruck a little bit, if I'm being honest about having Margaret Cho. I know.

We're honored to have her for sure. And she's been in the business 40 years? Yeah. I mean, and she's still going strong. I've been in the business 40 years too, only I just got a microphone four years ago. I had to save up all my allowance. Yeah, I'm so happy to have her on. So Margaret Cho coming up in just a few minutes.

But first, Chrissy, let me share with you a little story that I read and I think it's about time. I think it's about time. So, you know, all these states after Roe was overturned, and now all these states are taking extreme measures to make sure that, you know, women don't have rights over their body. And you don't need to be, you just need to be a casual listener of the commercial break to understand that that's not the way we swing. We, I don't believe in one bit of it. I just think it's all horse shit. It's all horse cocky. But if we're going to do what's fair, fair is fair.

And Kentucky, one of the states that I believe is passing these incredibly restrictive abortion laws, Kentucky has now passed a bill that makes it legal for mothers to collect child support from the moment of conception, which according to most of the people who would like to see abortion outlawed in any way, shape or form, conception is the second ... You jizz, essentially. That's it, right? So now, a mother has the right to go collect child support from the second, from the moment they get done making love. All right.

Amen. Raise the stakes for everybody, why don't we, right? Make you think twice about, like, have you been watching Love is Blind, or you watched Love is Blind? Yes. That guy, Jeremi, or whatever his name is, Jeremi with an A, how do you spell that? I have no idea. That guy didn't know how a dick worked.

Did you see that? He was like, I didn guy didn't know how a dick worked. Did you see that? He was like, I didn't know that all women weren't on birth control. What are you a fucking moron? He was like, I didn't know the ins and outs of birth control. You don't know the ins and outs of sex? And somebody was like, what about just the condom? Did you know about those? Yeah, just use a condom. Yeah.

He's like, I don't know. Well, to be honest. Everybody's always taking care of it. To be honest, I never really had to worry about it. You never had to worry about it. Yeah, that's right. You never had to worry about it, Jeremy. I gotta say, good for them.

They're in love and everything seems to be going well for them. Yes. They're expecting. They are? Yeah. Really? I think so.

Are you serious? I think so. Oh my God. Well, that's how sex works, Jeremy. Congratulations. They you serious? I think so. Oh my God. I think I saw that. Well, that's how sex works, Jeremy. Are they trying? Congratulations. They're trying? Yeah.

I thought the whole thing was he didn't want to try. The whole thing was they weren't having sex because he didn't want to be inconvenienced by birth control. I mean, what a noodnik thing to say. Fred Flintstone said smarter stuff. Do you know what I'm saying? Yeah. Barney Rubble had more brains than his head and his name was Barney Rubble. I mean, come on, man. Come on, dude.

I know that's his style. Yeah. But good for Kentucky, by the way. Amen. Listen, I'm down with this. What's good for the goose is good for the gander, as we learned 70 episodes ago when we spent an entire episode wondering what good for the goose, good for the gander meant. I forgot about the gander. We had so many people write it and be like, ah, that's a nice saying,

but I don't think a gander has anything to do with geese. Isn't it a gander of geese? We are not gonna go through it again. We're not gonna go through it again. Okay. Yeah. But I agree with this 1000% because you gotta, if someone's going to have to deal with the consequences and it takes two to tango, then let two people deal with the consequences. That's how it should go.

Yeah, and it together. Especially if we're going to, you know, outlaw some of the choices that were otherwise there to, listen, I don't want to go through a big political speech here. I just want my women friends, you and my wife and everybody else to know that it is not my place to make that decision. And it never will be. Unfortunately, God did not equip me with the uterus. Actually, fortunately, God did not equip me with the uterus. So I'd say, hey, hey, yay, yay, let's go.

Yeah, you should have the choice for a safe alternative if that's the choice that you make. Oh, yeah, let's not even get into the- I know. I was just watching a documentary actually yesterday about this guy in Hollywood, Scotty, and I can't remember his last name, but it was pretty crazy. I guess he wrote a book a few years ago about all the dalliances that happened in like the 40s and the 50s, you know, when people weren't able to be gay

or, you know, or bi or anything else. Other than just straight. So he wrote this tell all, but you know, they were talking about his daughter, his daughter died at 23 from having an abortion that was unsafe. Unbelievable. Yeah. Unbelievable. Welcome to the 1940s, kids. I know. It's crazy. That's why it excites me that Margaret Cho is here today. Let me explain a little bit. Not only is

Margaret Cho one of the best stand-up comedians of comedians period of all time, and I agree with that actually, but she has also been a big flag-waver for the fetish community, the kink community, the be what you be, do what you do community. Yeah, you be you. You be you community. And I can't think of another famous person that probably has been so out there on a lot of these issues. Yes. And so early, like back in the 90s, we were just talking about it. I think the first time, and I want to talk to her about this, I think the first time that I saw Margaret Cho was probably her Arsenio Hall appearance back in the early 90s.

That dates me, but it dates her too. So both of us are fucked as far as age is concerned. We're all on the backside. We just don't give a shit anymore. Yeah, exactly. But back in the early 90s, when I'm telling you something, there weren't a lot of, there certainly weren't a lot of comedians that were talking about LGBTQ issues, fetish, kink.

I mean, just like so many stereotypes and so many walls broken by Margaret Cho. And it'll be exciting to talk to her about all that stuff. I know, I can't wait. Yeah, well, maybe we'll talk to her about Kentucky too, because good for Kentucky. Good for Kentucky. Okay, you wanna do this?

Why don't we take a short break? Do you wanna do this? We already know what we're going to do. Do you wanna do this? Let's do it. I've only said that 12 interviews in a row. Do you want to do this? Do you want to take a break? And then after the break, we'll actually have the guest here in a move of podcast magic. We'll just port her in live while we're on the commercial

break. I would like to do that. You would like to do that? Okay. Then let's do that. And we'll also change outfits just in case you're watching this on YouTube. All right, we'll take a short break. We'll be back with Margaret's show. Well, thank the baby Jesus. Brian took a breath and now I will use this opportunity to let you know that we've got a brand new phone number.

That's right, it's 212-433-3TCB and you can text us anytime want. Or you can call and leave us a voicemail, and we might just use your message on the show, once Brian gets through all the messages he missed last year, of course. Anyway, you can also find and DM us on Instagram at the commercial break and on TikTok at TCB Podcast. And of course, all of our audio and video is easily found on tcbpodcast.com.

Now I'm gonna thank G one more time that we have sponsors, so thank G and here they are. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. If you've been listening to the show for the last six to nine months, then you know Chrissy and I have both had life events that have been very difficult for us. But that's the way it goes. Sometimes life takes unexpected turns. Chrissy and I both use therapy as a way to learn coping skills for those big life events, but also for the day-to-day difficulties that we all experience. Therapy isn't just for people who've experienced major trauma. I've found that it can help in the

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That's BetterHelp, H-E-L-P dot com slash commercial. It only works if you work it, as they say, and taking the first step is as easy as going to BetterHelp, H-E- to betterhelp.com slash commercial. Then you'll get 10% off your first month. And if you're anything like me, you'll start to look forward to the therapy appointments. And we want to thank BetterHelp again for being a sponsor of the commercial break. It's after bedtime, the kids are asleep and the moms are out to play. We're Dina and Kristen, the duo behind the Instagram account, Big Little Feelings.

I'm Deena, I'm a child therapist and mom of two who nerds out on all things neurobiology and psychology. And Kristen is a parent coach who wrangles three kids on a daily basis, here to give it to us like it is. We weren't meant to do this parenting thing alone. Consider after bedtime your village. Follow After Bedtime with Big Little Feelings on the Odyssey app or wherever you get your podcasts.

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Hi, Margaret. Thanks for joining us today. We really appreciate it. Thank you. Hi. Margaret, inquiring minds want to know and Chrissy and I were talking about this right before you appeared magically on our screen here. What is the worst thing that you have ever tasted drank or

tasted? Like the worst thing. I guess eaten or drunk. Okay so I was studying to be a raw vegan chef. Okay. And this was at the turn of century so this is 2000. Okay. The year 2000. And I was, this is before like, I mean, Erewhon existed but we didn't have the Erewhon that we have now. I mean we didn't really have the whole foods that we have now. It was very different. All those things existed, but that is not to the extent of raw vegan. They were like collectives and little markets here and there.

Yeah. They weren't like mass produced, beautifully quality food. No. Right, gotcha. No, so a lot of trial and error. So one time I tried to sprout soybeans and then make like a kind of like a sort of a, my own tofu.

Okay. And I did it wrong. But it looks so beautiful. Like it looked like Duncan Hines yellow cake batter mix. You know that beautiful like golden color and that creamy consistency and it looks so good. But I ate some and I threw up immediately because the taste was so awful.

Like it was bitter and acrid and like I ate a big bunch and it was just like the worst. I mean, the worst things I've eaten are by my own hand. I am really, sometimes I'm a terrible, I'm a chef in general. Sometimes I'm real terrible because I do things that are not really, you shouldn't do, don't do that.

Don't do that. Don't do that. Don't do that. Don't sprout it. And then, yeah, don't do that. Like, cause I just don't have the capacity. I've made myself sick multiple times. You know, just because I just don't have a handle.

But I also like know like what to serve people and what to not serve. So my experimental kitchen is my only, it's my own doing. But yeah, the worst thing, that, and then I tried to make something with soursop and I did it wrong. What is soursop? Soursop is a kind of a fruit.

It's sort of an exotic fruit. I think it's kind of a, more of a, kind of a Caribbean fruit. Okay. You know, from that region of the world, a little bit tropical and really not good, not good. Cherimoya, same thing, not good, not good. I made some puddings out of the, you know,

not, I shouldn't have done it. Don't do that. My wife is from Venezuela and she's always trying to get me to try stink fruit. Do you know what stink fruit is? Oh, I have not. I have not. Okay, like it's this, there is no smell on earth and I've never smelled the decomposing

body because I keep them under the house like most people should. And so I've never smelled anything quite as terrible as stink fruit. And I'm sure that's not the actual name. I think it's like the proverbial name that they give it. It's stink fruit, but it smells so bad. How could you ever want to put it in your mouth? That's just my opinion, personally. Well, sometimes the smell is not related to the taste.

Agree. Like durian. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Durian is a very off-putting smell. It smells like dirty laundry, or like feet, or like a decomposing body. That's also kind of what it's compared to. But in taste, it's quite like mango. I think it's similar to a very ripe papaya. You know, there's a really a delicious unctuousness to it, you know, that's similar to those fruits, but the smell is somewhat off putting and unrelated. I felt that way about like certain kinds of roquefort cheese, like blue cheeses and stuff like that. It felt that way for a long time in my early 20s until I actually tasted it and then I

was like, oh, this is delicious. I cannot believe I've been missing out on this all my life because it was so good. Do you remain vegan today? No, no, no. Okay. I eat everything. But at that time I was trying to accomplish something. I don't even know what. Me too. I did vegetarian for like six days and I was just trying to be a better human, I guess,

is like the best way to explain, like do something good for myself and maybe the earth and the poor animals and all this other stuff. But I just didn't, I don't know. It didn't sit with me. Yeah, it didn't take. It was six days, wasn't it?

Yeah. Yeah, well, I went. It was six days, wasn't it? It didn't take, yeah. Yeah, well, I went to a camp with Liza Minnelli and Ben Verene in the year 2000, and I so wanted to be like this raw vegan person. It was this very amazing, it was this amazing health place where a lot of people went to, when they had these life-threatening illnesses and they didn't have anywhere to turn. So they would go to this one place that was like this healing camp, whatever, and you

learned how to become a raw vegan chef. And they kind of showed you, and I took all these classes, but I did not apply that knowledge in my own kitchen. I was like, I'm going to buy it. I was like, bring on the bacon. Yeah. I think it was the bacon that I couldn't stay away from. Let's be honest. Bacon's good. Bacon's good.

It's hard to replicate. I mean, I know that there's lots of different kinds of like, you know, they do it with tempeh, they do it with all sorts of different things. You could do it with jackfruit, I believe. Sure. I've had it. Yeah. It's really its own thing. It's not the same.

Not at all. There's something about the flesh of an animal. Yeah. And I'm sorry little piggies, but you're just so delicious. Margaret, you're such a legendary comic and it seems to me at least from my point of view, you seemingly have broke every stereotype and possible prejudice to just become so successful and then, I don't know, kind of clear a path for others behind you. Do you still love the joke? Do you still love the art of comedy? Are you still in love with getting up there and making people laugh after all these years?

Well, thank you. And yes, it's a mystery because comedy is an ever evolving mystery that you'll never quite figure out. You know, like it's, and your notoriety will only really buy you about 10 or 15 seconds of grace out there. You have to always deliver and always be funny, no matter who you are. You know, the most famous illustrious comedians bomb. Yeah.

Because you don't have time, you don't have the time. No. You don't have the luxury of time. It's our job description. It's just, it has to be satisfied all the time. You cannot, that's the best thing about it and the worst thing about it. So you have to continually work on it. Do you still bomb? Do you have to continually work on it. Do you still bomb? Do you still have bad nights? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Also, I do a lot of nights. So yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. You're working all the time, right? I mean, you're just like, how many nights a week do you work still up on stage? I guess I would say three to four to five. Like it depends because I sort of divide my time amongst other types of things too So and also the other other kinds of live performance, so That I'm trying to work on as well So it's it's more like I I mean it's the majority of what I go out for like all the like to the farmers market Or the comedy club. Yes, what are the other? So it's like that kind of thing when you comedy club. What are the other? So it's like that kind of thing.

When you were young, I have asked this question of a few comedians that I hold in high regard and I do you also. What is the first thing you remember being funny? Um, I just, well, we had a really old school VCR, you know, my parents had one, it had, was had woods, wood on the side. The wood paneling. Oh yeah, the wood paneling. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I remember. Yeah.

And I mimic the grain of the television. So it was like these wood sided, like old technology, but we had an old VCR and my dad really loved stand-up comedy so we would get to watch old like we would get to watch old concert comedy films that he we would rent at the video store so we rented like Buddy Hackett yeah in concert which was so funny and ridiculous and also Richard Pryor all of Richard Pryor's comedy shows were on video. It was a really big deal. And also very adult. A lot of things I didn't even understand was what was happening. I was really too young

to even know what these jokes were about exactly. But the fact that he was so animated and just engaging to watch. He was just quite a mimic and really just so majestic in this way, he's kind of like this king. I really took to that. And then of course I think Eddie Murphy's Delirious when I was a little bit older. That had a huge, huge impact, you know, because you saw that comedy now sort of branched into this rock star kind of thing.

Which I think Eddie Murphy was really kind of the first to do that. And then, then I think the person that really clinched it for me was Joan Rivers. When I saw her, I was really like, oh, this is what I will grow up to be. Yeah. Something about those prior, Carlin, Chris Rock,

later on, they stalk the stage. They stalk the stage. They make you pay attention. Your eyes can't leave them. They're rhythmic. It's almost musical in a way. And that always got me about some of my favorite stand-up comics is that there was a musicality to it,

but there was also a very commanding presence about it. Joan was like that too. She had a very, like she- Absolutely. You couldn't take your eyes off her if she was in the room. I remember watching her and my grandma's like guest bedroom on the Johnny Carson show.

Because I think she would, she would guest host there sometimes, I believe. Yeah. And that was like my first exposure with Joan. It was just- And you guys got to be friends too and know each other, right? Yes.

Yeah. Yes. We were very, very good friends. And she had a very musical quality. It was like a staccato. Yeah. Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah. Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah. That's kind of like the way that, you know that you would hear her voice in your head.

It was like, it was this beat, you know, and it is very musical. But Joan was really a good friend and a mentor and certainly as later in life as I got older and she was just so important. So you know, I really miss her. You know, it's been 10 years now. It's hard to believe. Yeah, it's a long time, but also her presence is so enormous. And as I get older, I think, oh, this is, Joan would like this.

Joan would get a kick out of this and you know, she would have laughed or she would have enjoyed it as you get older does do does your impact on? Comedy does it does that become more important like is it something that you think about your own impact on? Well, I know that I know that like what's great is that I get got to encourage a lot of Asian American comedians to think, oh, I can do this, you know, so a lot of Asian American comedians look to me as being the major influence and that's a really great, to me that's the best legacy. I'm really proud of that and I'm always hitting them up for jobs. I'm always hitting up like, hitting them up for jobs. I'm always hitting up like, Boneyang, Ali Wong, like you better get me in season two a beef. You know, you gotta get, you gotta, you gotta, like I just

really, cause I just really want to ride their coattails all the way up. But I, I'm really grateful to have had a hand in their, uh, development and you know, um, they're so amazing. Yeah. Oh yeah. For sure. It's full circle. It's the children eat their young eventually, you know what I'm saying? You ride my coattails and I'll ride yours a little bit later. I love it. You had a really interesting upbringing. Your parents owned a gay bookstore. So, by gay bookstore, when you refer to this, and we've seen this a number of times in podcasts and interviews,

is it just mainly gay material that they are, that your parents were selling inside of the bookstore, or was it like a community center, like a place to congregate and hang out? Both. I mean, it also sold like a mainstream literature, mainstream books and you know, whatever that is, like photography books, which is also kind of gay, art, any kind of literature.

We would have book signings, people would do readings. You know, it was like an old school, like independent bookstore. I mean, at that time it wasn't like considered independent because, you know, Amazon and stuff like that didn't exist, but like it would be like an independent bookseller like today. Right. So and the focus was on gay literature but also everybody else and you know we had a very like a large section for magazines we had a lot of tattoo magazines and that's where I met Don Ed Hardy, who was selling his own like tattoo time, these like specialized books that he would make and curate, showing

tattooing from all over the world. So he would bring them in and we would sell them on consignment and he would tattoo a lot of the people at the bookstore. Wow. So cool. And he ended up tattooing me later in the early 2000s. So it's like, I think it was just sort of a bookstore that was an art center, but mostly for the gay community. And how did they get into that?

Yeah, that's a great question. Well, I don't really know exactly. I think they just liked the idea of having a bookstore. It was like this thing that my dad wanted to do. My dad was also a writer. So he just liked the sort of literary pursuit of being sort of this bookseller and he wanted to curate window displays and things like having like, we had like one time we had sort of a big manger for Christmas and you had all of the figures reading books like Mary's reading. Wow, I love that. books like, you know, like Mary's reading, you know, like Simone de Beauvoir, like feminist stuff, and you know, Jesus is reading like a children's book, and just

stuff like that, that's sort of very like, it's barely irreverent, but also kind of alludes to like sort of literature and it was like just a touch satirical if you knew what he was going for. Yeah, it's cute. And I think, so he wanted to have also like a community center. So I think, yeah, they just wanted something that was there. And that particular brookster had come up for sale. So that's why. I wonder, like, I wish I had your back.

I know, it seems like a great place for a feed. So open's why. I wonder, like, I wish I had your parents. I know, it seems like a great place for a thing. So open-minded. I mean, we're not talking about this, like, you having, your parents having bought this bookstore in 2020, this is back in the 70s, am I right? Yeah, this was in 1978. So the world was such a different place back then. How far we've come and how not far we've come

over the last, you know, a couple of decades. But your parents are so open-minded, I imagine that had a big influence on who you became because they were just wide open. They didn't have access to all of that. Yes, it's really lucky and I think also because, so in San Francisco in that era was also very progressive in its own way. And they were electing Harvey Milk to public office, who was the first gay public official, a politician in elected office. And so there was a political movements happening.

And so getting to grow up around that was incredibly, you know, like an incredible education. And my first gay pride was in 1978. So that's an amazing thing to grow up next to and around. And also the heartbreaking thing of having to grow up alongside AIDS, which was a horrifying, I mean, you can't even imagine the desperation I mean, you can't even imagine the desperation that the community felt at that time.

To return from that is also really triumphant. The kind of exposure, I mean, I grew up in the 80s, and so the AIDS epidemic was just national news for years and years and years. And I never forget my mom, I think maybe watching an Oprah episode and bawling her eyes out about how people didn't wanna touch people that had HIV or AIDS. And how she told us, you know, these people, they're not pariahs, like they're not lepers.

And I'm like eight years old. So I'm like, you know, I don't even really understand what's going on, but I just remember my mom being so emotionally affected by this. But this is as far as I went. I grew up in a suburban Chicago area. So I wasn't in San Francisco where it was kind of ground zero for this.

And I bet that must've been greatly affected, affecting as such a young person whose parents owned this bookstore that became a community center and how devastating and like you said, a sense of desperation that went on there. And I bet there was a lot of sadness and a lot of heartbreak that went on there

over those years also, you know, people passing away and getting sick and all that other stuff. It was so dark and traumatic. And I think, you know, then also the people who didn't die, you know, we had a lot of survivor's guilt as well. Yeah. So you had a sense of this community collapse. And then our business collapsed underneath all of that as well.

Oh, did it? Yeah. Infrastructure of that as well. The entire infrastructure of that neighborhood collapsed. So in a sense that we, you know, that there was, there was a couple of gay neighborhoods in San Francisco that were really very, very big. I mean, the whole city is very gay, but there was two, it was kind of centralized into two huge neighborhoods. And then our neighborhood,

the Polk district completely collapsed and the Castro remained. So, and I think that's still true to this day. It's really sort of... It never came back. ...the Castro that remains, but the Polk District never came back. Oh, that's very interesting and so sad and you don't think about that when you think about the AIDS epidemic. You don't think about the survivors guilt and then the businesses, the people who were going to work every day, who one day just weren't there, right? And all these other things and the businesses that also,

the people that frequented the businesses that catered to the LGBT community and then all of the sudden, they're just not there or they're too devastated or they move away because it's too sad. What a, yeah, that's a, you know, we all think about COVID as the most recent, you know, devastating health issue that happened. But I think that when we were going through that, or when the country was going through that,

I do remember that being just so sad. And just the way that I will remember my mom being affected by that visually striking, sobbing in the family room, I knew that it was sad, right? It must've been something sad. You, but did that also, I think, like spur on your, I see you as a champion of all things,

fetish and kink and, you know, LGBTQ. You're so damn open-minded. I wish everybody was like you. Do you think that that empathy, that being in the middle of that, that helped you kind of form this like deep well of love and affection and wanting to champion these causes? Because I think you've been very, you know, out there on these causes. You're not a shrinking violet when it comes to that. Well, thank you. You're welcome. Well, I think kink was a direct reaction to the way that we were learning as a community to heal and also to find ways to have sex without fluid bonding.

Ah, very interesting. So kink became a way to look at this idea of sex being still risky, but not actually risky. So how do we like, um, Do it without doing it. Yeah. Yeah. Find a way to do it that doesn't necessarily involve, um, exchanging fluids, yet at the same time is immersive and transgressive. So kink was almost, uh, this out, like outside idea that became, oh wow, we could actually do something that is really, really transformative

and incredibly cathartic, but we don't have to put our lives at risk when we're living with HIV. So it's a really specific kind of thing that I was drawn to BDSM because it was sort of like the time period and also those sorts of businesses around the gay community were really booming like in that era and like alternative way where we can kind of get busy with ourselves and each other without putting anybody in harm's way. Oh, that's a very, that's very interesting.

I never even thought about it like that. And you became a, were you Dominatrix for a while also? Yeah, but I am like a better raw chef than I am. I'm like really bad dominatrix. Like I'm really like, what do they want? What do they, oh, really? I'm so indecisive and I'm really like, I have no conviction.

That's the worst. Like I'm like a real like, okay. Like I just don't have what it takes to be a good dominatrix. I do like every so often like I'll go back and so before the pandemic I was doing this thing with my friends where we were going to be rope doms. So we're going to do suspension bondage and like you know with like all the Japanese ties and stuff. So I started

doing that and then we had to stop doing them in person because of the lockdown. And it never quite came back. And there's something about it when you do it online, it's really hard to figure out because everything's reversed. Right. It's a mirror image, yeah. I'm like, what do I, you have to get behind me.

I don't know what I'm doing. So it's like, I'm much better off if I do it in person, but those classes haven't come back yet. When they do, I'm definitely into it, but it's really hard to do it online. A Zoom Shibari class. You know, listen, I am a straight white guy from Chicago, but I have met a few women who have been

into some BDSM type stuff, and I'm like you, I just don't have a conviction. I'm like, I don't want to hurt you. Really? I mean, is that really what you want? I don't know. It's just, but that's, you know, that's not for me. That particular thing is not for me, but there,

I also feel like sometimes kink is a little performative also, and that part of it I can get into sometimes. Like, you know, there's kinks that I feel are performative and that's can be fun in the bedroom. What's like the what is the because I feel you're much more of an expert at this than the commercial break but what is like the kinkiest kink you've heard of been a part of seen like the most out there? Weird as shit. What? Latex beds where they're like compressed in this. So you know, when you vacuum seal food, they'll vacuum seal themselves into like a latex bed.

Oh, wow. So that's like, to me, I'm like, I'm like, what? Okay. Like when you okay, okay So I get I don't know what Okay, yeah but that any kind of like a vacuum thing or like there was but one guy that really like they took the cake was this guy who really nice guy and he

was this guy who, really nice guy, and he would take a, he rigged a veterinary, like a medicine, like a medical machine that usually is used in veterinary medicine. And it's like a suction thing to pull out body fluids. So he rigged it to use it on his penis, and he would hook it onto his penis for up to like 48 hours so that his penis would swell to the size of a, like a basketball.

So it looked like he was holding a basketball in his lap but it was actually his penis. And he would just sit around like that for hours. And after taking out the sort of the suction thing, and you know, he described it as being, he would high off the sensation and you know, and I- Probably because the blood left his head.

Yeah. I couldn't figure out, like he wasn't really either a top or a bottom. It had no sort of power dynamic involved. Okay. Like it wasn't like somebody was forcing him to do that. It wasn't like he would, you know, he wasn't using it because it was just like a marshmallow.

So it couldn't be inserted into anything. So it wasn't necessarily about like, you know, I'm sure that it's a kink, so I'm sure there was some kind of pleasure involved for him, whether that was maybe the blood leaving his head and making him high. And enlarging it. Yeah, maybe.

It's the body modification that he was excited by, and so it didn't necessarily fit, cause he would show up to like these like could quote-unquote like play parties at all these dungeons. Sometimes dungeons will hold like these parties where they sort of have lots of different types of people come and use the facility to play and then it's almost very performative. So he would have his own room where he would do that. And he would pay for like the most expensive, he's very very wealthy. So he would have his own room or he would do that. Wow.

And he would pay for like the most expensive, he was very, very wealthy. So he would pay for like the most expensive, he had like yachts and stuff. Like he was like this really rich guy. But also like you couldn't, I couldn't figure it out. You couldn't figure it out. Yeah. I can't figure it out either. But I mean, that's the wonderful thing I think about kink when you think about it is that if you wanna do it, you can do it. Like as long as you're not without consent hurting somebody else, then do it, whatever.

It's all good. You wanna dress up like a furry cool, you wanna blow your penis up to the size of a basketball? Cool, or suck it up to the size of a basketball. I've seen that done on vaginas. I've seen that in certain videos. I've seen people like, put those suctions on their vaginas. And I'm sure that also probably brings some kink.

Were you a phone sex worker one time too? Yeah, when I was really young. How young? I was like 15. Holy shit. I was doing it like 15, but I didn't talk to anybody. Like I was doing like recorded messages. So I tried to sort of like, I sort of got like,

try to talk to people, but then it wasn't working. So they would like have us. So I had my friend and I would write these kind of like messages and then we would read them. And it was this thing called Hot Girls USA where we were doing phone sex for people who were just learning English. So it was a very simple sentence structure.

And the girls, my name is Mary, I have large breasts. And you would just go through these very simple sentences so people learning English could get an understanding of, I guess they were like learning English as a second language. Yeah, it's like dual lingo for horny people. Yes. So this is all sort of before apps and before Rosetta Stone Yeah, it's like, do a lingo for horny people. Yes. So this is all sort of before apps and before Rosetta Stone or any of those things, so you had another way.

But that was, it was actually, we made a lot of money doing that. Yeah. So it was really great. Those services made a lot of money. Yeah, my dad can tell you. They did. He paid quite a few of those bills.

It was a... It was 976. 976, 1-900 numbers. We've done episodes on this before, but there were these companies that were making millions and millions of dollars a week bringing in people that wanted to talk sex on the phone. And I can imagine... The sex and the psychics. I remember those.

The sex and the psychics, those two. Like Miss Cleo. Yeah, Miss Cleo. There Miss Cleo. Miss Cleo. Yeah, Miss Cleo. There's a version of Miss Cleo that's back, I think. There's like, you know, California psychics or something like that. Yeah, I heard that commercial.

I just don't think they can make the promises that Miss Cleo did, because I hear she got in trouble. You- So interesting. I know. You, over your career, have worked with so many people. You've done so many things, television, film, comedy. Can you pinpoint your favorite comedian that you've worked with?

Like, that you've worked with. Not a favorite comedian that you've seen, but a favorite comedian or two that you have worked with. Well, I really love working with Wanda Sykes because we just- She's so great. And we have a good time. You know, we do karaoke and she loves to sing

some Jeffrey Osborne. Oh really? And she's just very good. She's a really good, she's such a good person to hang out with and just like laugh. I also laugh a ton with Amy Schumer. We really get along. You're in the-

We really get along. You're in Life and Beth, right? Yeah, yeah. So we really, we just have a good time, you know, and she and I have the same sense of humor. So we just really, we really laugh. And, you know, I really appreciate her in so many ways. So I love her.

One of our producers would like you to know, her name is Christina, one of our producers, she's such a huge fan of yours, and she would like you to know, her name is Christina, one of our producers, she's such a huge fan of yours. And she would like you to know that her dream OBGYN is you. Just so that she knows. Oh, thank you. Thank you, I agree. I think I would be good at that.

I think that's one thing that I would be able to do very easily. I love that show. I haven't gotten to your specific episode yet because I just started binging it. But yeah, it's a great show. I love the first season too. So yeah. And I do have to tell you, even though I think it's a total of five full minutes in the entire series, I think your turn on 30 Rock was so fucking hilarious. I

just think it was so good. Did you enjoy working on that show? Oh, I loved it. You know, I loved Tina too. Tina is just really an incredible person. And you know, she's so, I've done quite a few things with her, you know, things that haven't made it on the air, you know, unfortunately, like I've done like pilots with her and she's just, she always puts me in things. She's always thinking of me

and I'm just so grateful to her for that. But I also just enjoy her comedy, her perspective. And she's just, she's awesome. She seems like one of those human beings that was just born a fucking badass. You know what I'm saying? In my opinion, she seems like she can do no wrong. Comedically, when she acts, when she's, you know,

I'm assuming when she's writing, when she hosts those shows, she's just so good every time. She seems like a great person. She seems like a good human being too. So you're on tour right now, as I'm sure that is the constant in your life. You're always on tour, well, I mean, not during the pandemic, but I'm sure has been the constant in your life. And is this all new material that you're doing now? Or are you? Yes. Yes. I think it's, you know, also like comedians in general,

like what my theory is that we're all just telling the same joke, but we're telling it in a million different ways. Like, you know, you have- It's like music. Yeah. Yeah. You have like sort have- It's like music, yeah. Yeah, you have like sort of your style and your way of being, and then you present that

in a million different ways. Yeah. You know, so- Do you ever revisit, do you ever revisit bits, segments, jokes? Do you ever say, like, you know, we just, Chrissy and I were just watching the Arsenio Hall, where I think I first saw you back in 1993 and there's some funny stuff in there

and you're referring to being a child of the eighties, you know, all this other stuff. Do you ever like go back, look and go, Hey, I think I could retool that massage it a little bit and bring it forward. Yeah. Like the greatest all the time, all the time, all the time. You know who does that is so great at doing that is Brian Regan. Oh, I love Brian Regan. Isn't he the best?

He is. I interviewed him on Clubhouse and I just loved him. I thought he was great. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I love him. I love him. He's so underrated, but I love Brian. I mean, he's very famous. He's a genius. But I just don't think he gets the credit he deserves.

No, he doesn't. And he really is so special. But at the end of his shows now for the encore, he asked for requests. So audience members get to yell out their favorite and they'll do them. And it's always different. You just never know.

It's so great. That is so, that is such a good idea. You should start that in your show. Well yeah you have to go back and brush up. Brush up on it. I mean everything and yeah I've thought about doing that but I think you know it's just like you can kind of go back and revisit things and people really appreciate it also if you have a new take on it because we're always different. Yeah changing. You know so. Are you a student of comedy? Do you feel like you're a student of comedy? And do you write everything down?

And, or is it just, I take you make bullet points and then go from there. What's your process when it comes to writing? I mean, the thing is, is that like with certain things in standup comedy, I will have a photographic memory. Like if something works, then I'll always, I like, oh, I know it works like that. Yeah. That's what it does. And then I just file it away. I do write a lot, a lot down, but I don't

write it word for word how it is, because I kind of will remember it. Sure. But also, it's like all kind of captured in all different ways. Yeah. So I just have a sense of like, oh, this worked this way. And for some reason, memory really works my favor when it comes to stand-up comedy, not necessarily anything else. Me neither. You know, it's- Comedy is good. I was telling Chrissy this, I don't know, we do so many episodes of the show, who knows? But I was telling her this a couple of months ago. I said, you know, I'm a guy of a certain age,

I have very young children, they occupy a ton of space in my head as does all the normal stress. And so I don't, my memory does not work in my favor 70% of the time. But when I get in this studio, if I hear a clip from one of our episodes, I know exactly what I was thinking during that moment. And what I thought I thought I should say, like it just takes me back to that moment instantaneous.

Like the only thing that my memory is good for Is remembering the one thing it should not be good But it is kind of crazy and I kind of understand do you ever go up on stage you have your set You know where you're generally gonna go with it and then the crowd demeanor the energy It makes you like kind of shape-shift a joke in certain way, like, oh, this crowd is a little extra hype, so let me put an extra pregnant pause here, or let me tell this joke in a different way, or I'm just, I'm such a fan of how this all works,

so I'm curious. Yeah, because it's like stand up comedy is so alive, you have to be alive with it, so you have to adapt to whatever's happening in the moment and what you're doing, and also the way that things started. Also, if you're performing on a show where there's significant people before you, you have to sort of bring them into it as well,

or the energy of what's happening as well. So you have to be alive with the jokes as well. You're not sort of able to tell them on the same way every time. I mean, you need to sort of tell them the same way, but you also have to be alive to what is the different thing that's going on. Yeah, that makes a lot of sense. Are you taking anybody on tour with you this time? Yes.

On tour with me right now is a wonderful comedian named Daniel Webb. He is so hilarious and we've been working together now for four years and I'm really enamored with him. I think he's really, really special. And like, I'm really lucky because everybody that's opened for me now plays stadiums. Like the people who open for me is like, I mean, it's pretty incredible.

Like Jim Gaffigan, Otsuko Okatsuka, um, you know, uh, all of these, these people who are like Mark Birbiglia, um, Russell Peters, everybody who's like opens me like now is like Sir Jonathan Van Ness. They like all go into this very stratosphere, it's really like this incredible thing. So I'm a good judge of talent. You're a good judge of character. Always. Yeah, I'm really good at it.

It's also not like you're playing, I mean, you do go, I'm sure like a lot of comics, you go to the comedy store and you, but that's a great, that's a legendary room to play in itself, but you're also not playing these, some cafe somewhere, either you're doing it right. No, no, but it's really amazing, like all the people that I've like had open for me have really gone on to this incredible success.

So Daniel is really great. And so have you. Named one of Rolling Stone's top 50 comics of all time. What an amazing, and I have to agree with them. Margaret Cho, you are a legend. I don't know how or why you got on this show, but we are better for it. We love you. You are the best. I hope that someday you will come back and say hello to us again because there are seven million things I want to talk to you about.

We only got to six. Ask one more question. We have a couple more minutes. Well, how's Lucia for one? I love your dog. She's been sitting right here. She's so adorable. Right on my thigh. Oh. The most adorable. Look at that look in her eyes.

So good. She's so good. Do you take her on tour? She's a little tired. Yes. Of course. Yes, she goes everywhere. And today we were in the studio all day today

So she's really tired because there was another dog there. She was running around there Excitement with a brindle a little brindle dog. Look at her. She's really she's Extremely tired and so she was sitting right here this whole time Oh, you've been so good with your ass I don't look at that face So she was sitting right here this whole time. Oh, you've been so good to Chiella. She's so good. I need to get me one of those. That dog makes no, that dog didn't bark once.

I have a dog and she has appeared on every episode of the commercial break by way of barking the entire time. She's a Yorkie though, so you know. Oh, cute. God bless her soul. She was born like that. Tickets available now for Margaret Stewart, Life and Beth. We're going to put all of the information available in the show notes.

Margaret Show, the Notorious CHO, thank you so much for spending time. We are just very grateful for it. Thank you. Well thank the baby Jesus. Brian took a breath and now I will use this opportunity to let you know that we've got a brand new phone number. That's right, it's 212-433-3TCB, and you can text us anytime you want, or you can call and leave us a voicemail,

and we might just use your message on the show, once Brian gets through all the messages he missed last year, of course. Anyway, you can also find and DM us on Instagram at the commercial break and on TikTok at TCB Podcast. And of course, all of also find and DM us on Instagram at the commercial break and on TikTok at TCB Podcast. And of course, all of our audio and video is easily found on TCB Podcast.com. Now I'm going to thank G one more time that we have sponsors, so thank G and here they

are. On April 7th, you must be very careful about it. It's the girl. Witness the birth. The times will start now. Evil things. Of evil. It's all. You know don't. The first omen.

I believe the girl is to be the mother. Mother of what? The most terrifying. 666 is the mark of the devil. Movie of the year. Real story. Who said that? The first omen.

Only in Deteriorable Fet. The movie of the year. The real, real, real story of Zedda. The first omen. Only theater circle fit. Oh my gosh. Margaret fucking Cho kids. I mean, I just love her so much. What a, just a refreshing, you know, take on the world that she has.

And I mean, so unique with her upbringing and what all she's done throughout her whole life. It's just, it's amazing. And I just, I love her. Kids got a story to tell. That's for sure. Kids got a story to tell. I did not have a penis balloon on my bingo card for 2024, but I did ask the question. So I got the answer. Exactly. That was, as you know, as she was talking about it, I was picturing it, you know, you can't help it. And so I just-

What was it? She said it was the size of a bowling ball. Yeah, I mean it was large. And she said he was like a billionaire. Didn't she? Like he's a billionaire. Yes, he was very wealthy. I guess when you have that much money

and you can literally have anything you want, you have to go to extremes. Find new ways to entertain yourself. Just have to do it. Yeah. Me, I stay awake by just stressing about money. The billionaire, he stays awake wondering how to spend it all. Well, I guess I could blow my penis up like a bowling ball. That's interesting.

Ah. Oh, that's gotta do something to your junk, don't you think? Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Gotta do something not healthy to your junk. Repercussions. Yeah, but you're a billionaire, you just get a? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Something not healthy. Yeah, but you're a billionaire. You just get a new one. Yeah. A penis transplant. Oh Lord. Margaret Cho, the great Margaret Cho is on tour now. So go to margaretcho.com backslash tour. If you want tour tickets, you can go there. You can see everything about it. She's got a big old nice,

very nice website. So do that and go see her because she is incredible. Chrissy and I took some time. We watched a lot of the standup videos that she's had from the first television appearance that she had to the most recent YouTube videos that she's put out. The lady is still fucking funny. She's still got it. Like she said, she's still like the art of the joke

is still in her head. She loves the danger. It's so interesting too. I've noticed because we've talked to quite a few, you know, more mature comedians. That's a nice way to put it. Yeah. And some younger ones and their different takes on how their process is and what they do is interesting. It's very interesting. And I think one of the things that I think I didn't expect, but I liked, was she shared with us that, you know, you have 15 seconds, right? You got a minute. You got a minute with the crowd.

And you think someone like Margaret Cho, after so many years, so much success and selling out venues, time after time again, being up, you know, in comedy clubs, four or five nights a week, that you just would, I guess not kill every time, but you wouldn't expect to have a bad night, a bad day at the office. But she still says, you know, I only got a few minutes with my audience, and if they're not there with me, they're not there with me.

And she still says she bombs. And that makes me feel good because that makes, lets me know that every four episodes that we do, three and a half of them are bombs. And I'm still, I also know that I have 15 seconds. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Ah, good old Elton. Well, another thing that she was mentioning, and it makes me want to go check out this other guy too,

that she's on tour with Daniel Webb. Yeah, yeah. Because she was mentioning, and it's so true, everybody that she brings out with her blows up. Sells out stadiums. Yeah, it ends up going crazy. And that's a testament to her eye. And then she says like, hey, when am I going to sell out stadiums?

I mean, yeah, I guess that's the way you feel. No matter where you're at, you always want more success. That's how successful people get successful. That's why we're not, is because they're hungry for more. We're happy with less, right? We like being mediocre. Yeah, we like being mediocre. I don't want to be at the top of the pack or the bottom of the pack. I just want to be right in the middle. I'm okay with it. But one of the things that I guess, I guess it just is indicative of someone that is hungry for success that they, you know, they want to play bigger stadiums. They want to make funnier

jokes. They want to whatever they want to be the best at their, that they, you know, they want to play bigger stadiums, they want to make fun of your jokes, they want to whatever, they want to be the best at their art that they can possibly be. But what a fucking life. I mean, you know, what a fucking life. And she's so right. Awkwafina, you know, all these people, all the, the comics who have come from Asia or are of Asian descent, she kind of broke the barriers for them. That must be an interesting feeling to go to sleep at night and know that you were the first and everybody came but like rushing in behind you, but you were the first at something.

I'd like to be the first at anything. I'm not the first at anything. That I don't know, for me, that feels like such an accomplishment. And had I done the same thing, I probably would have just slept the rest of my life. You know what I'm saying? Break down the barriers and then take a nap until you die. I mean, seriously, one good, And had I done the same thing, I probably would have just slept the rest of my life. You know what I'm saying?

Break down the barriers and then take a nap until you die. I mean, seriously, one good, think about it in your own personal life. When have you been the first, the best, the fastest, had the most audience members? When have you ever been, so few people can say that about anything. Unless we're talking about like stupid Guinness Book of World Records shit, like, you know, I don't know. Most keys on a keyboard are something, I made keyboard, 3000 keys, who cares, gives a fuck. I'm talking about like really important stuff,

like breaking down stereotypes and prejudices. And- And using her voice and her platform to then not only break down as a comedian barriers, but then to also be talking about all of the other things too, to do with, you know, gay, bisexual, whatever. Again, you be you, whatever you're into. You do you. You do you. She said it, she didn't say this in this interview, but she said it in other interviews that her mom doesn't believe in bisexual. So she just calls, she says, just

be gay. Yeah, just pick one. Just pick one. And then the other thing she says is, bisexual is not necessarily like a PC term right now, I guess, I don't know, I don't keep, you know, I can't keep up with everything, but I saw her in another interview say that, it's not necessarily PC to say bisexual,

but I like it because it's kind of 70s-ish. Right, that's right. Yeah, she was saying pansexual is more the term. Pansexual. Yeah, hey, listen, I'm into it if you're into it. That's all I gotta say. So the great Margaret Cho, MargaretCho.com. Go get your tickets for her tour right now,

please and thank you. I sure as shit hope that she comes back because I mean, I say this after every single guest, but I think I've mentored on most of them. I wish we had had more time. And we probably do, but I don't want to like burn them out on the commercial break. You know what I'm saying? Right. I want to give us a small opportunity, a small window of opportunity to invite some of these people

back with the hopes that they may actually say yes. And if I spend two hours with them now, they're going to be like, that's way too much commercial break in my lifetime. Right. I spent 120 minutes with them. That's 119 more than I needed to spend with them. But we are very grateful for Margaret coming on the show and good luck with the tour. She's not coming to Atlanta. I wish she was because I'd go see her with you. I know.

She might be adding stuff. I'd go get my penis pump and- Be there in the front row? Right there with my big bowling ball cock. I mean, I did it, Margaret. I did it. I tried that. I tried it. It worked. I can't feel my lower body, but it's awesome.

I'm high as a kite. Okie dokie. You know what to do. Go to TCBpodcast.com. More information about the show. Chrissy and I, you can read all the show notes, get all the links to all of our guests information. If you want tickets, if you want to check them out, all that stuff is available on the show notes of that particular episode. Uh, and you can get your free piggy front and sticker by hitting the contact us button. Give us your physical address. Piggy front

and front. Well, I thought I'd throw a little twang in there since last time we saw Teresa. by hitting the contact us button. Give us your physical address. Piggy frontin'. Piggy frontin'. Frontin'. Well, I thought I'd throw a little twang in there. Since last time we saw Teresa, she was at that, whatever it was, the hot dog shack or something. Right. I don't know. I don't know. It is a terrible show, by the way.

It is. It's just terrible. Yeah. All right, but onward and upward. So go get your Piggy Frontin' sticker, give us your address. We'll send it off to 1-2-4-3-3-3-T-CTCB. 1-2-1-2-4-3-3-3-TCB. Questions, comments, concerns, content ideas. Ask TCB.

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1-2-1-2-4-3-3-TCB. 1-2-1-2-4-3-3-TCB. 1-2-1-2-4-3-3-TCB. 1-2-1-2-4-3-3-TCB. 1-2-1-2-4-3-3-TCB. 1- Let us know you have a story, you want advice, you wanna ask us something, whatever it is. We're opening up the phone lines, but since you don't know when we record, you gotta text us so we can set it up. To 1-2-4-3-3-3-TCB. Do it now, we're gonna start doing that soon. Add the commercial break on Instagram, TCB Podcasts on TikTok,

and youtube.com slash the commercial break. All right, Chrissy, I guess that's all I can do for today. I think so. I love you. I love you. Best to you. And best to you out there in the podcast universe. commercial break. All right, Chrissy, I guess that's all I can do for today. I love you. I love you. Best to you. Best to you out there in the podcast universe. Until next time, Chrissy and I will say,

we do say and we must say, goodbye. I get ass!