The Commercial Break - The One & Only "The Commercial Break"
Episode Date: June 22, 2021Bryan and Hoadley discuss a flood of new reviews that came in for the show. Only one problem, the reviews are for another show! Then Bryan and Hoadley discuss ED medications. Plus, the listeners have ...spoken and they are more twisted than the hosts. TCB fan William sends the gang down a rabbit hole researching a fetish known as "Masking". It's a follow up to the Real Doll episode and its a doozy! LINKS: Win $500 from TCBtv-(minus) by following Instagram or subscribing on YouTube and leaving a comment on your favorite episode in the month of June. Watch this episode on Youtube TCBTV-minus Sponsor Magic Spoon Cereal Is INCREDIBLE! Try it with promo code TCB EarBuds Podcast Newsletter SquadCast Podcast Remote Audio / Video Recording Hello Fresh: Use Code TCB12 Apostrophe: Dinner Table Dermatology. $15 off your online appointment. Use The Code COMMERCIAL Subscribe to The Commercial Break Podcast Youtube Channel Join The Comedy Podcasts Club on ClubHouse New Episodes on Tuesdays and now Fridays everywhere! Text or leave us a message: +1 (470) 584.8449 FOLLOW US: Instagram: @thecommercialbreak @bryangcomedy @tcbkrissy ClubHouse: @bryangreen @tcbkrissy ClubHouse: The Commercial Break Club on Clubhouse! (home of live recordings) Twitter: tcbbryan Facebook: The Commercial Break Podcast YouTube: Youtube.com/TheCommercialBreak Email: info@tcbpodcast.com A Chartable Top 100 Comedy Podcast #1 Trending Comedy Podcast Worldwide! (Chartable) #1 Trending Comedy Podcast U.S.(Chartable) An Apple Top 100 Comedy Podcast Top 1% Downloaded Podcasts, Worldwide (ListenNotes) A Hot 50 Podcast (Podcast Magazine) Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
Transcript
Discussion (0)
WSHIT's focus on Krab Apples community continues when we go live to City Hall for public comments
on this week's agenda.
First up, again, Karen Bloomsfield from Wattles to At Street addresses concerns she has
around public use of funds.
This is Bloomsfield is of course the reason why we have the 30 second limit on public comments.
Karen, your time starts now.
So, are we going?
See, I have a name, let's spell it.
ARROYO-GUZ-M-A-N.
You know those names?
You should.
See, there's a movie called ARROYO2014.
Get up and watch it. And guess what?
I'm not the rancher. Not the rancher's wife. Not the rancher's kid. Not that I couldn't have been.
That's not the path I chose. What is it? My ex-husband is the killer. And newsflash. She's not dead.
So see this here? Because I was showing somebody that City doesn't really use real money. So here,
when you send me something, this is what you send it to. You send it to arro-guzmainfamilytrustaccount.
I'm the executive director, Terry Pope-Gonzalez.
Here's a post office box.
Here you go, young lady.
Please don't be upset with me.
Hey, now my brother.
Karen?
What's here?
Checking you guys out.
This is Bloomsfield.
Don't buy uncles.
Do you know you have scratchy toilet paper?
What?
We really got treated bad.
So you know what he said?
Huh?
I'm going to buy them some toilet paper.
Get them to be in the front.
Why would I buy some toilet paper? Get some toilet paper in.
Because guess what?
I guess that's why everybody's supposed to be in the custody.
Get rid of that custody.
Get rid of that custody.
Okay.
Okay.
Well, thank you very much, Karen.
We'll be back right after this commercial break.
You guys are talking about me?
You have no idea who knows me.
Let's see that young man back there.
That is investigator Schaefer, badge number 1193.
Black for him.
Because he protects you guys from people like me.
You know, the people you screw over.
Yeah.
Because guess what? You got over the limit. And I'll flip it. on this episode of the commercial break. Explain to your listeners exactly where to go because I think they're leaving us great reviews.
I really meant for you.
If you're getting a bunch of shitty reviews,
it's clear we're all mixed up.
Right.
So first of all, lose the commercial break name.
Change it all together because we've done it.
We're dominating.
Got 16-17 listeners every single episode.
What are you gonna do?
Try and catch up.
Right.
Just try and get us.
We're so far ahead at this point.
Men's boners can't be a problem.
It's a real thing.
It's, I mean, not for me.
I'm like an ox.
Strong, I'm like an ox.
No. I can get half a boner in two seconds.
Look at how hard my cock is.
And with the Alice, it's kind of like Daniel Dayleus.
He's famous for taking on a character like Lincoln and
never breaking character for six months during shooting.
Yeah, it'd be like someone handed a cell phone and be like, you got a text message, so
text message? Have we freed the slaves yet?
You know, and it's like, hey, Daniel, this is a text message. Don't talk to me about
Shanky Panky's text messages. I'm trying to write the emancipation population.
The next episode of the commercial break starts now.
Oh yeah! Welcome to the episode of the three! I'm Ryan, this is Chrissy and Happy New Year.
Best to you, Chrissy.
Best to you, Brian.
And best to you out there.
Congratulations on listening to another episode
of this The Commercial Break.
Yes.
Just wanna point that out, it's The Commercial Break.
Uh-huh.
So an interesting thing has been happening
and we'll get right into it.
We've been getting many new reviews on Apple.
Over the last couple of weeks,
we've gotten like six new reviews,
which is, you know, reviews kind of come into snail's pace.
We have a lot of five stars, which we appreciate out there,
keep hitting that five star button.
Smash it.
Smash it.
Smash that like, smash that subscribe bell.
That's a smash that subscribe bell.
Look at my body.
Smash the subscribe bell.
There's lots of new Frankie material.
He's got like three new videos out.
But okay, I get it.
I'll settle down on Frankie a little bit.
Okay, we'll give it a couple of months.
So people have been leaving reviews
which kind of come into the snail's pace.
I think we had like 14 reviews before last week.
Okay.
And then we got six new reviews in about a week
and a half period.
And I was like, wow, this is great.
Yes.
Until I started reading the reviews
Now I know I told you we got our first one star review, you know congratulations. We get it You know like Frankie. Okay fine. We'll do it
But I started reading the reviews and the first one was like great podcasts super information
And I was like wow great news source look at that they're getting it
You know they think we give great information
like news source. Look at that. They're getting it, you know, they think we give great information.
How to fuck a removable vagina. Or a sister wise, find a sister, or you know, a B sexy over 40 or 50 or 60. We give you that kind of information. That's kind of information.
We pedal here at the commercial break. But then the next one said, great news source, unbiased information.
Right.
And I was like, great news source.
What are you talking about?
Like clearly you're not getting your news for the commercial break.
That's how we got in this mess in the first place.
You don't get your information from the commercial break.
We don't claim to know anything.
We don't know anything.
Don't take anything we...
We're internet sleuths.
Don't listen to anything we say.
Don't take any vitamins we mentioned.
I mean, it's less of the sponsor, right?
But don't take anything,
I swear on all the told we don't know shit.
We don't claim responsibility for anything.
Then the third review is like unbiased information
from the C-T-B-C-S crew.
And I'm like, who's the C-T-B-C-S crew?
Yeah.
What is that?
There's another thing.
It's another thing is all, is right.
It's another thing all together.
I got to the bottom of this
and I think I understand what's going on.
There are about five commercial break podcasts
within their name, commercial break.
Okay, yeah.
Some of them, one of them is not broadcasting anymore.
I know that for a fact,
but the other four I think are broadcasting
into some measure.
Now, whenever you look up the commercial break podcast,
you'll find us, or commercial break podcasts, you'll find us.
And so I think what's happening is people are listening
to this other particular commercial break podcast.
But they're writing a review for us.
They're writing a review for us.
Okay.
There's nothing I can do about that.
I can't forward the review to the other commercial break guy.
We don't know each other.
And so while I won't give out the names of those other podcasts,
just so I don't add to the confusion.
If you're listening other commercial break people,
you better explain to your listeners exactly where to go
because I think they're leaving us great reviews.
They're really nice for you.
If you're getting a bunch of shitty reviews,
it's clear we're all mixed up. Right. So first of all, lose the commercial break shitty reviews, it's clear. We're all mixed up.
Right.
Right.
So first of all, lose the commercial break name.
Change it all together.
Yeah, we've done it.
We've done it.
We're dominating.
Got 16, 17 listeners every single episode.
What are you going to do?
Try and catch up.
Right.
Just try and get us.
We're so far ahead at this point.
It's a close a year and a half to get 17 listeners.
Two of which are my mom and Irving. Jeff, Astrid, my son, who's probably accounts for four of those
because he knows how to use the... He does. That's right. He really does now. I think it starts now.
Yeah, it starts now. That's why I say when I went over when we go into the commercial break up.
I don't know the episode of the commercial break because that's what my son does.
He goes, I'm the commercial break.
So other commercial break guy, if you're getting reviews like I canceled my cancel my
Spotify subscription because of you. If you're getting those kind of you ruined me for podcasting. I took Google off my computer
because of you. If you're getting those kind of reviews, it's
clear what's going on here. We have a review mix up, right? And so
there's nothing I can do. I can't contact, I mean, I could try to
contact somebody to Apple, but they don't give a shit about either
on our podcast. So they're not going to do a thing. They're
going to be like, what? You're complaining about great reviews?
Just take them.
Cares, no one reads a shit anyway.
Ha ha ha ha.
Right.
Even we know it's stupid, so don't worry about it.
Yeah.
Just take it.
Nothing I can do.
So anyway, I think that's what's going on.
Okay.
What else is going on in the world of the commercial break podcast
is there's a lot of people over the last couple of months
who are communicating with us outside the podcast.
I love this. And leave comments on Instagram, but sending us emails on YouTube. They of people over the last couple of months who are communicating with us outside the podcast. I love this.
The comments on Instagram, the sending us emails on YouTube, they're all over the
place and we really appreciate it.
And I think we've got a couple like die hard fans, people who say they listen every
episode.
And clearly they know what they're talking about.
They'll leave a review and then I'll reply, you know, something smart ass, you know,
oh, thanks for the, you know, I can't even believe one person listens to that.
And then they'll reply best to you. And I think that just just warms the cuckles of my
scrundals sack. Just want you. Well, it's a very versatile saying too. You know, you can say best
to you in almost any situation. Exactly. I thought about it the other day. It's really the best.
I was just like out the world something and I was like was like, I'm actually saying that to people too,
and I'm like, best to you.
It's some stupid thing I said I was,
you know, and now it's a thing.
I think Jeff said something,
and I was like, best to you.
I'm not.
It was that Starbucks the other day,
and I was like,
she was like, here you go,
and I was like, best to you.
And she was like, yeah.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Whatever.
What the fuck, you gonna leave me a tip?
Right.
I don't think we tip to Starbucks.
Who's tip to Starbucks?
Do we tip to Starbucks? I do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do place, TCBpodcast.com, 470-584-8449,
is where you can leave us a text message,
or a voicemail, lots of people doing that,
we appreciate it.
If you have a content idea, if you would like to hear
Chrissy and I talk about something,
or you just have some kind of, you know,
you have some retort to something we say on air,
you wanna talk, discuss, some important stuff,
you don't like best to you, you have a different greeting,
or salutation you'd like to put out there in the world.
Let us know 4705848449.
What's most important in the month of June?
Here's what's most important at the commercial break.
Go there on Instagram, find the post about the $500 gift card giveaway and leave a comment
about your favorite episode.
Tag a friend.
You're entered in to win $500
in green or gold dot gift cards, whichever ones you choose on July 7th will make the announcement
and possibly even have the winner right here on the show.
Super exciting stuff.
And if you're not into Instagram, you don't like that.
If you'd rather watch the show, if you'd like to look at us while we're doing the show,
if you'd like to look at Chrissy, you can always go to a piece of paper, like tape a piece of paper
on one half of the screen and just watch Chrissy. YouTube.com slash the commercial break,
subscribe and do the same thing. Leave a comment on your favorite episode about your favorite
part of the show and you'll be entered into win. I realize you can't, I don't think you
can tag a friend actually on YouTube, but that's okay, leave a comment, we'll still enter you in.
We're gonna pick our favorite comment
and we're gonna award you $500 in the gift card of your choice.
So for a dominoes.
Applebee's whatever.
Bass pro shop, whatever you're in to.
Don't worry.
Whatever those gift cards are,
whatever those gift cards are,
that has like everything.
Everything.
The online erectile dysfunction pharmacy,
if it's out there, we'll give it to you.
Don't worry, what is someone is like,
I need to buy my boner medication.
Can I get one to droganors.com?
Did you notice that like the erectile dysfunction,
the whole universe has gone online.
Like now you can just call up a fake
doctor and get a prescription for Viagra. Yes. So good. You tell Jeff about that. So good.
But there's all right. Not really. All men. Yeah. I got $10 off for a referral. I'm going
to send it to Jeff and as if it wasn't a problem enough before. To what? Men's boners. Men's boners. Men's boners can't be a problem.
It's a real thing.
It's not for me.
I'm like an ox.
Strong, I'm like an ox.
I can get half a boner in two seconds.
Look at how hard my cock is. And with the Alice, strong and straight.
We're looking for a sponsor.
Anybody who's wondering what's one of those online boner medication people?
What is it called?
I've seen a commercial.
There's a bunch of them.
Like Rex M.D. I think is one of them. Dave or something called, dude? I've seen a commercial. There's a bunch of them. Like Rex M.D., I think, is one of them.
Dave or something.
One of them's got like a...
Yeah, Dave.
Man's name.
Hey, I'm Dave.
And about three years ago, I noticed that I had a quarter-boner syndrome.
I could get a quarter-boner, but I couldn't get a hundred percent boner.
See what I did?
I found a fake doctor to give me a real prescription.
Exactly, that's how everybody does it.
Fill it in Canada,
send it off to India,
then mail it to myself to a Guatemala.
And now I've got generic fake boner medication.
Tell you what, as it helped my boner,
but I got a raging headache.
That's been going on for two years.
But my teeth have never been so light.
Didn't fix my boner, but I don't have any sinus problems anymore. Can't fuck anything, but I can hear a mile away.
I didn't. Other symptoms. That's right. I was wondering why the pills turn green when
they hit the air. I opened the bottle. They turn green
But I don't worry about it anymore. I've had a boner for six years
Actually, I have to wear a dress around
Or or something else that you could wear. Oh, yeah, or Chrissy doing a segue good for you
Look at her. She's getting into it. Look at it. She's getting into it
Just like one day I'm gonna host this podcast
When Brian dies from taking too much ED medication. I'm gonna take over the commercial
Brian has a health issue
The case Brian has to take a couple weeks off because of his propriism
I kept knocking into walls of my boner first. Oh no
Look at my cocky
Thousand bucks
I just when he gets a new bottle of ED medication.
He just breaks it out, you know, double, like through French doors.
And it's somewhere in his house.
And it's like, look at my boner.
Who's ready to fuck it up?
It hurts really bad.
It's been like this for six hours.
I told you that story about a friend of mine to go to the house. Yes, we just like dropped them up like it was a gunshot victim
Okay, talk to you later
Put that with your boner
Don't know how to help you there at the hospital
Because I'm with your car
He's on a gurney it just looks like a tent
He's rolling to each rolling through the emergency room. It looks like a tent
Wow, that guy's got a problem
They do say I know my commercials. I know what's your doctor, yeah. I had a friend who went through this
because he was a fucking moron.
He was 29 years old, he had a perfectly healthy God.
And he was doing cocaine like it was going out of style.
He decided that was the night to take 300 milligrams
Viagra for fun.
Nine hours later, he was at the hospital
and they were like injecting him with some shit.
It was unbelievable.
Okay, so let's get to the show.
And now it's time for the commercial break.
If you're in the market for the products and services
that our sponsors offer, please do us a favor
and use our specialized URL and discount codes.
It really helps the show.
It helps us create new content
and keep it flowing for free.
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Wow, we have an incredible way of just going off the rails.
Don't we?
I think that's what people like about the show.
Actually, it's like, they just never go
there.
They start with one plan, but we've here.
Plans, shmans, who cares?
So we're getting a lot of feedback from the audience.
And one of our fans, William, who I just love the guy to death, Super Rockstar, emailed
me the other night and he said, hey, Brian, I was listening to your episode on the
sex dolls and great episode, find it incredibly interesting.
But if you wanna take it a step further,
if we do,
we get worked arranged, yeah.
Do we?
He's like, if you wanna go on the,
we further down the rabbit hole and I'm like,
I can't be any further down, I thought.
He said, watch this.
It sent me a link.
And when I watched it, what it was,
men who are not in love with sex dolls,
men who are in love with dressing like sex dolls.
Okay.
So it's taking it a step further.
They don't love the sex dolls.
They want to look like the sex dolls.
They want to be the sex doll.
They want to be the sex doll.
Now, I'm going to, I'll put a link to a photograph
on the show note. It's Gustavo if you'll do that force
That's that's what we call editor notes right here live
Gustavo do a bunch of stuff for us
so
When I explain this I want to make sure that I'm explaining it correctly
This is not someone who is transgendered or who a man who is dressing like a woman. This is not a drag show
This is someone a drag show.
This is someone who has a full latex body suit
to look like a doll.
The whole purpose is to look like the doll.
Not to look like a woman, to look like a woman doll.
So it's a bit unnerving to see these people in real life
because their mouths don't move.
Their eyeballs are, you can't see their eyes.
It's not like they have holes set out for their eyes.
It's actual like plastic eyes, like the sex dolls, but even a little bit more plastic
fantastic than that.
Right.
And they put the full body suit on.
All of their head is covered in their hair.
They put a wig on with the doll with the doll hair.
Then they put a full from ankle to neck body suit on.
That includes fake plastic breasts, like, you know,
breast end plants, and a catheter in their penis so that they can
pee like a woman through their fake sex doll vagina.
Okay.
Now, as has been described, it's not in the clips I'm going to,
I'm going to play to you, but that's, you know, they really wanna get into it.
Yeah, they don't wanna break character at all.
Yeah.
And listen, I think you hear this with a lot of people
when they're into some of these like,
Picadillo type things, right?
When they dress as a Furby, they wanna be the Furby.
They don't wanna be Bob dressed as a Furby,
they wanna be the fucking Furby, right?
They don't wanna break character at all. It's kind of like, you know, uh, who's that guy who the
award-winning actor, uh, who did, uh, all those movies with Lee, who he was in lead with Lee
and Arda de Caprio and the gangs of New York. Okay. You know what I'm talking about? Daniel
Deilo is. Okay. It's kind of like Daniel Deilo. He's famous for taking on a character like Lincoln
and never breaking
character for six months during shooting. Yeah, it'd be like someone to hand him a cell
phone and be like, you got a text message. So text message. Have we freed the slaves yet?
Right. You know, and it's like, hey, Daniel, it's just a text message. Don't talk to me
about shanky pinkies text messages. I'm trying to write the emancipation, proclamation.
Right.
So these people are very much the same way.
They don't want to break character for any reason.
And so they go to extreme lengths to do that,
including putting a catheter in their penis.
That's amazing.
That's what is that painful?
I've never had one, but it seems like it would be painful.
Would putting anything in your re-re-throw be painful?
Of course it is.
Yes. Yeah, you're I mean
It's incredibly painful. It's what people fear about going to the hospital and getting surgery
Yes, it's they're gonna stick to get your e-rethra in or pull it out. Oh, that's something to you
Especially if you're not used to having one like there's people who have them all the time
And I think you get used to it after all because you know, you know
It's whatever the mechanics of it. It stretches
But when you're just like, sticking it in there for fun, that's not how you enter.
That is a sexual preference that maybe one day we'll cover here on the commercial break,
sticking things inside of the penis.
But anyway, so these people really take it to the slinks.
Now my personal opinion, these are older white gentlemen, they tend to be in, there's
tens of thousands of them, they tend to live in the United States, Canada, Germany, Denmark,
you know, the Eastern European countries,
Western European countries, excuse me.
And I think that they just have like some desire to be a woman.
That's a little bit suppressed.
And so for them, this is like kind of like a stepping stone into that.
That's just my opinion.
Or they could just be in addressing like sex dolls. Who knows?
Yeah, instead of going through the trouble
of putting on the makeup and going to find the clothes
and getting surgery even, just slip on the latex.
Slip on the latex, take it off at night,
put it back on the morning.
Yeah.
Let me let us be clear about something, by the way.
We call attention to this stuff
because we like to have fun with it.
Yeah.
But at least from my point of view,
God bless you.
Yeah, I know.
You wanna dress like a sex doll?
Just like a fucking sex doll who cares.
Right.
Let your freak flag fly.
Do your thing.
As long as you aren't hurting me or my children,
I don't give a shit.
And quite frankly, I find it fascinating.
Yeah, it is.
It gives us great content for the show.
I guess it's a great content for the show.
You wanna get into this a little bit?
Okay, let's start with Vice Magazine.
Okay.
Vice Magazine did a rather lengthy documentary.
I say it rather lengthy, rather lengthy for our purposes,
documentary.
So I just cut up the first, very first part of it
where she explains what's going on in the men dressing
like Sextal.
There's not, I don't think there's a name for it.
Yeah, like there's not a short name for it
But it's just men that dress like sex dolls. Okay. Let's take a listen. I Brian. Oh
Brian it's your mom
Let's let's meet our
First sex doll
I Brian it's your mom Brian
I brought it to mom. Id you dress like a sex doll. I thought I'd give you a call to
that over. I support you on any no matter what you want. I can
hear my mom can hear my mom on the phone as I go, Hey, mama, I
like to dress like a sex doll. Oh, that's nice honey. Yeah. Maybe
I'll buy you some tits for Christmas.
Yes, you're right.
Come on over.
Yeah, come on over.
My mom's super accepting of everybody.
Yes.
Except for old people at her old people home.
She's like, I hate these old people, the old people home.
Like mom.
What you're hearing is the, as someone, this woman, I guess, now, the doll is now walking
what you're hearing is all the plastic moving around.
Hello, I'd like to introduce me.
I am Kim now dressed as a French man.
And I am ready for taking my duties.
First of all, this sounds like the guy I was emailing
with that one time.
On this camera.
Oh yeah, I couldn't talk and I'd like to introduce me.
You like to introduce you?
I'd like to introduce you too.
Nice to meet you.
I am ready for my duties.
Ready for my duties.
This is the lady's dress as a French knight
or a French maid.
French maid.
Okay.
French maid, he's got the little Bob skirt on,
you know, the French maid, the secular Bob skirt
and the sexy little outfit.
By the way, I've been to France, huh?
I was expecting that too.
They're not wearing them there.
I got someone that looked more like this guy
dressed as a sex doll than my interpretation of a French maid.
I'm just saying.
I paid a lot of money for this hotel.
Where are the French maids?
Female masking is an underground community.
Female masking. The predominantly community. Female masking.
The predominantly older men from around the world who dress up as dolls.
To do this, they wear type of second-skinned silicone suit, face masks and prosthetic breasts.
There are a lot of people who like to dress up as a doll.
From every encounter of the world, there are dolls, there are several thousands of dollars doing this.
This is not only in Europe, it is so well.
It all started in the 80s with a man from England
who was making masks for the Batman movies.
He experimented a bit and developed his first Femal mask.
With the internet, Femal can quickly turn into a global trend.
Today, most female maskers are from the US,
UK and Germany.
The best thing is that you have a mask on,
and you look at people and you look at them in mirrors.
In mirrors?
What does every weird sex thing sound so much better
when you say it in Danish?
I guess is what this is.
I'm German.
You know what I'm saying?
I'm just a foreign language.
And she's meant to know vagina.
I'm in here like, wow.
Yeah, cool.
Let's do that.
Let's go.
I'm into that.
Whatever that is.
It means I put screwdriver into your vagina.
Oh, oh, we're doing that as a thing?
That's okay.
All right, yeah.
Talk to me again in that foreign language. It puts screws in your penis head. Oh, oh, we're doing that as a thing. That's okay. All right. Talk to me again about foreign language.
It puts screws in your penis head.
Oh, cool.
And she jumped and she sh meagled.
Sh meagled.
Like Lord of the Rings.
Like the Lord of the Rings, I think what she said was,
these men did us like sexed out
because they look like sh meagled.
Which by the way, you can't see the video video but some of these guys are not they're older but
they're not bad looking guys I mean I'm maybe I'm just saying that because I'm getting
older and I'm hoping no one's going godbrun
44 more like 74 74. The first time she did that. He knows for. Yeah, that's really a legacy you're passing down. He lies on spring and still head off.
He started dressing like on Shekstall.
He's the granddaddy of the Shekstall.
He would put Shumishman into the Phoenix.
That's right, at the living Shekstall's.
Not so much anymore.
Are you getting this letter?
Ah, on Spiegel.
On Spiegel six feet under.
Here lies speak.
Here lies speak.
Gully, you did was very illegal.
It put penis in his top like little outside eagle.
I make her I'm on it's obituary.
I was getting used to that.
I did that. That's right.
Come on, little schmoonly,
Jen, let let our juniors let's go see your grandfather. I don't want to make it
weird.
The good news is when these guys die, you can just
prop up and leave them in the living room. Yeah, just like a sex dog. That's not creepy. Good morning, grandfather
I want to remember my grandfather exactly the way I saw him
So I made him into sex dog and now we stoop every month in a while. I catch him looking at me
He says come here here, Schmigl.
Give me your stupension.
By the way, this is incredibly offensive German accent.
I'm really sorry.
Is it out of fashion to be, is it out of fashion to be incredibly offensive?
I know, I think we just naturally are here. I'm sorry, being offensive comes naturally to me.
It's a talent I have.
So should I?
If you're upset, so are many other people.
Yes.
But band together, make a Facebook post about it.
They call you Kim or Hank.
When I am in this outfit, I am Hank.
But when I am dressed, they're kin.
Can you tell me how you started with Fima masking?
Very simple.
I was interested in masks,
and one reason was that I didn't like my face.
That was very simple.
That's a pretty, that's breaking it down there.
You got to admire those dames.
They just kinda break the cuts of the chase.
It was about like, mashing it like my face.
I want to punch myself in face every time I look at me.
Beam out all sex, all living sex, all living sex, all those born.
I want to look sexy.
Oh, what else do you think?
What's got to the questions I ask me?
I want to look sexy, I want to have tits.
I like playing with my own tits. I want to look sexy, I want to have tits. Yeah.
I like playing with my own tits.
Like, what's going to happen?
Please, call me Daniel, not Kim.
I'm not in the outfit yet.
And I like to be another person.
And I like to be a woman.
I wanted to be John Mayer, but I don't know the play guitar.
I was trying to get an unlaid in a bar,
but then it'll be John Mayer, but they kept on saying,
you look like Spiegel.
Oh, lucky.
Oh, lucky.
Oh, lucky.
Now we're going to Spanish over Germany.
Oh, lucky. wearing a stash. When was the last to you?
Best to you.
Best to you came and best to you, Daniel.
Okay, let's go to another.
Let's go to another.
Let's go to another.
This person also, they dress up and they walk around town like this.
Like, he said, at first, I was afraid.
I didn't want to go out.
But then I just felt so natural to me
to be dressed like this and look like this.
And I really enjoyed this
that I wanted to get out there in the world.
And he did, and now his community
is very accepting of him.
Okay, great.
Again, I think like, of course it's Western Europe.
Like Western Europe,
they're just accepting of everything over there.
Exactly, it's so nice.
Yeah, here you get shot for anything,
for someone off in traffic and you die.
You wanna hear about the guy here in America?
Yes.
Okay, he calls himself the latex dad.
Okay. So let's listen to him himself the latex dad. Okay.
So let's listen to him.
It's from mini-show, duh.
My name is John Phillips.
I live in Minnesota.
I am a factory worker and I dress as a rubber doll.
Latex can be used to mold your body.
I filter what I think is attractive.
You can separate dressing sexy from sexual behavior.
Yeah, where's your boobs?
Yeah, where's your boobs?
I have a god.
Don't forget those.
They're in the closet, honey.
You mind grabbing them?
Got me a pair of the double D's.
Right, very special day.
And I can't even imagine a weird discrimination
that's going on in the house.
To me, it's foreign.
Like, I understand it's normal to them,
and listen to what he says.
The kids love it.
They were completely accepting
and they didn't have any social filters
that made them think,
oh, that's all about sex,
or that you're some kind of pervert.
I'm not 100% sure the kids love it.
Like, I don't think they love it.
Well, I think it's just dress up.
Yeah. No one has anything to do with sex dolls. Well, what you can't see is that there's I'm not sure the kids love it. I don't think they love it. I think it's just dress up.
No one has anything to do with sex dolls.
What you can't see is that there's a couple of younger children, right?
They look like they're probably under the age of 10, or at least some of the age of 12.
And then there's an older teenage girl that one who says,
Hey, dad, where's your baby?
Oh, I totally forgot them.
I believe in your keys on the table.
I forgot my tits.
Can you go back and get them for me?
I'm going to pull up to the driveway.
Can you run in and grab my tits real quick?
Dad, you forgot your boobs.
You can only inspire one day for me.
I come in one day.
We're leaving one day and my team is like, you forgot your plastic pussy, Dan!
I did?
Silly old me, I'm getting old.
I feel like shriegel.
I basically told him, no matter how I'm dressed, I'm still your dad.
I've put to rest a lot of fears in my lifestyle.
It's not destructive.
No matter which plastic appendage I pee out of, I'm still your father.
I actually lost a job because of it. But I have an MBA, aerospace degree, wearing latex,
it's not control my life. I have a latex lifestyle. It doesn't mean that's all that I am.
I'm a rock star with sense of humor and
I don't like living in fear.
By the way, he says, I know the music, Chris and I are just jamming out to this.
youtube.com slash the commercial break you can check it out. All this music is just I'm in a John Hughes movie.
I feel like someone's gonna run out and profess their love for me any moment.
I love the sex doll.
I don't know what to do.
What go to the problem with me.
Can I buy your panties?
He says in one part of this, he says, you know, I'm just a regular guy.
Sextal, you know, masking doesn't define who I am. It's just part of who I am, you know, I'm a guy.
I'm a destructive yet. He lost a job. He lost a job, which I kind of think is the definition of
destructive. I'm gonna need to know how that went down too, because did he, was he caught in the bathroom with the,
or.
I think there are places where it's appropriate
to dress up like a sex doll, like your house,
the club, the bus.
The bus, yeah, the sex doll factory.
That's right, the sex doll factory.
But there are places where maybe just like, you know,
I wouldn't dress up as, I don't know, a Superman,
and go to work.
I think that you should go along with that same rassul.
You gotta play that out a little bit.
Like if I show up as a sex doll today
with my fake tits and plastic vagina,
is anybody gonna be offended by that?
Or is that the appropriate place?
It's like gonna be distracting.
He's also an aerospace engineer too.
So imagine making that pitch to NASA.
Right, like I don't know if it's this too.
I like to do it in our news.
Our brand new Cart Zero Emission Self-Sustaining Rocket
Ship to the Moon.
Doesn't mean that he fuel or any other,
it's groundbreaking.
Are you dressed as a sex doll?
Nevermind.
Are you peeing on that catheter right now?
It's very abstract.
Pay attention to my presentation.
What, I can't dress as a sex doll.
Yeah, that's right.
What's wrong with you?
It's 2021.
I mean, listen, there are some things I think we gotta put.
Yes.
Not we gotta put, but some things that just are.
It just is the way it is.
Right.
It's like, you don't show up in a thong
to the sales meeting.
You just tell them to do that, unless you're someone
here at the strip club, I guess.
But you don't do that.
Why?
Because it's not the accepted thing to do.
We, as a collective, decided that,
hey, dress up as suit, or at the very least in gackies,
come business casual.
Not as a sex doll and a French maid outfit.
Yeah.
I don't understand what's wrong.
When she puts your brother
a look at this rather than my face.
When she rather look at my presentation on perpetual motion,
rather than my double D cutlets.
Okay, one more. Okay. This. Okay, this is a talk show. I think that runs somewhere
in the UK, but they did a whole expose on a guy here in the United States.
Okay.
All of us. A secret community of men whoS.X.S. and Silicon Six-Suits transform themselves into the fantasy doll of their dreams.
It's just that sounds like you're winning something.
YouTube can be turned into the fantasy doll of your dreams.
That's like the life of the person.
What was his name? Richard Leach.
Richard Leach, that's right.
Robin Leach.
I'm Robin Leach and YouTube can have a pair of double days in
nature. Have the tips of your dreams and a plastic vagina to boot when you join the club of masking.
We enter the sexy swanky world of masking. John lives in his mother's basement. He's 77 years old and today on employed he's going to dress as a woman
Check it out champagne wishes and caviar dreams as he sticks a catheter directly in his who-hoo out that must hurt
Watch him enter the world.
Oh, there he goes, getting beat up,
I get on the street corner.
Because a public bus is not a place to bring the sex doll mask.
It's all high times in glamour and grits for John,
as he takes a number two in his latex suit.
Because how do you get it off when you're gonna go, you got to go.
I'm making this show, we're gonna make this show.
My name is Rob and I go by P virus.
He goes by P virus, what is his worst name ever? P virus.
What is the worst name ever?
P virus.
You know, you're done with.
Anything with virus, then.
Oh, actually, it's T virus.
A T virus.
Like T cell virus, like HIV.
I don't know.
I don't know.
I'm just making an assumption.
I don't know that that's not
certainly what it is, but T virus is an awful fucking name.
That is.
Yeah, change that.
Yeah.
Hey, how are you?
Good T virus. Hey, I'm your blind date on T virus. Oh
well
My husband just got in a car accident with our four children. I gotta go. I didn't think you were married. No, no
I've been married for a long time. This is all a big mistake. I gotta go
But wait, T virus
But wait, T virus loves you! T T T T T T T T T T T T T T T T T T T'm 55 years old. I was married for 20 years. I'm not married any longer. In my private life, I'm having doll
It's clearly not real and it's not intended to be real. They're not even like emotionless inspiration.
Well, first of all, I gotta think about this.
It's gotta be extremely difficult as a day for say, right?
And I got divorced very young.
So for me, there was lots of runway ahead of me.
Like I never had any doubt that I would get a second bite at the apple,
so to speak, or that at least a very least I'd have a very fulfilling love life if I,
that's what I chose to do. Right. Now I understand that doesn't come naturally to some people,
and I understand there's a lot of men in particular who find it very difficult to get back up on that
horse and ride after a breakup or a divorce, but it's got to be hard to be 55 years old, married for 20 years, and then all of the sudden
your life changes.
But maybe part of the reason why this didn't work out is because you're harboring these
secret fantasies.
Your name is T virus.
And your name is T virus.
First.
You've started calling yourself T virus. Can you take my name, please? No, I don't want to be called Sheila virus
She virus. No, not gonna happen. Yeah, you started calling yourself T virus and
dressing and I am T virus junior
My dad was the famous T virus of Nashville, Tennessee
First I was the Sires than the tea.
Yeah.
Okay.
So you get the point.
I can go through lots of things.
I actually find the audio to be a little bit.
It's a little weird in my headphones, so I don't want to play it if it's disturbing everybody.
But you get the point.
These guys are dressing like actual dolls.
Now there's women.
They're not transgendered.
They're not a drag.
And it's specifically sex dolls.
It's specifically sex dolls.
Go Google this, go Google masking
and see how disturbing these masks actually are.
They're super unnerving.
They're so creepy.
Yeah, because they're super practically really.
Because they like see kind of see-through-y too,
or you can kind of see.
They're not see-through-y at all.
They're completely opaque.
Imagine a sextile with more like plastic features,
like even more plasticky than a sextile already looks.
Super crazy makeup to you know, like give them like,
you know, cheekbones and chin lines and all this other stuff.
Super big lips with bright red lipstick and you know,
dark eyeshadow.
And then dull hair.
So it doesn't even look like real hair.
It literally looks like, I don't know.
Is the head separate from the body
or is it like a full zip up in the back?
All the way from the body.
They pull the face on and then there is either,
there's either like shoelaces in the back
or they tie it up and one guy in one of the documents.
There are many, many documentaries on this, by the way.
Is it not such a secret world at all?
There's a lot of you.
I just say it on the world.
It's a secret, it's a fact.
You too can have the world of your dreams
in your mom's basement.
Spending thousands of dollars
dressing up like a sex doll.
So one guy, when he was tying it up, tying it up is like the, that's the serious way to do it.
You're really involved in it. If you're tying it up, there's a zipper, like with a little
stain and you pull it down.
When he's tying it up, he's like with every knot that I lace, I become more and more
this woman, right? So I love the act of knotting it up
because with everyone, I transform into this woman.
It's like a meditation that I'm going through
a metamorphosis, which, okay, cool.
I do the same thing before I walk here in the studio.
I take a cup of deep breath and go,
this fucking show, I can't believe,
I can't believe I got obligations now.
Chris, he's gonna be here soon.
Chris, he's gonna be here soon.
Better wake up, get a cup of coffee, try and be funny.
Oh.
You too can be a, you too can be a mildly famous podcast.
Uh,
uh,
uh,
uh,
uh,
uh,
uh,
uh,
uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, Famous podcast equals someone besides your mom knowing your podcast just to let you know, which just happened recently someone recognized that's right someone recognize me. Um, so these men are
Obviously harboring this desire to look in some way like the female form right and maybe a maybe because the plastic dolls they don't age,
like if you're in drag, you're at age regardless.
And you gotta know how to put on makeup
and get the right clothes for your body.
Your body.
But with this, it's kind of just like a suit.
It is.
It's a very hot sticky suit that you put yourself into.
That's not easy to get into or out of.
One of these guys that took them an hour and 15 minutes
to get dressed like that, hour and 15 minutes,
just to put on the latex.
And when you, I would play it, but the sound
doesn't, you know, it doesn't make great sound sense
to play it.
But when they're putting these on,
it's like, imagine latex on a sweaty skin, right?
It's really hard to move anywhere, and it's skin tight.
So they're constantly putting baby powder in there
to try and get it up another inch,
get it up another inch, get it up another inch.
Wow.
It's a whole fucking hard deal.
Just for like, you know, walk around town for 15 minutes.
I don't get it.
It's not for me, obviously.
It's not my thing.
I wouldn't do it.
But I power to you.
But I see no harm in it.
Honestly, I don't, whatever.
The guy that we were just-
We might scare little kids, but that's okay.
Yeah, I mean, it's pretty scary. And then they put on the you know the heels with the you know foot
Half heels and they're walking around town seven foot seven looking like a plastic fan
Yeah, and this last guy that we just heard from he actually was born with a clef lip a pretty bad clef lip
Right, so while it was fixed as he was a child
He says part of the reason why he got attracted to masking in particular putting on a mask
He was doing that since he was a child to run away from child, he says part of the reason why he got attracted to masking in particular, putting on a mask.
He was doing that since he was a child to run away from people making fun of him because
of his cleft flip.
Now, that totally makes psychological sense.
Not that you need to have total psychological sense to do any of this.
Yeah.
Right.
Actually, I'd love to have a masker on the, uh, some of the, is into masking on the commercial
break. Absolutely.
So if you know of somebody that's in the masking,
or you yourself are in the masking,
or some version there of, let us know.
We can do like a little voice disguising,
we don't have to use your name.
Yeah, by the way, let me share this with you.
If you're into one of these things,
one of these topics that we're talking about,
or you're just something to do with anything.
Anything.
And you'd like to come on the commercial break.
You do not have to give your real name.
Let me explain why I'm explaining this.
And I'm talking to a couple people in particular.
They contact us and they share that they're into some of this stuff.
I won't even go as far as so far. I'll respect our privacy completely. I won't even go so far as to say who contact, you know
Why they contacted us. I'll just say this and I've shared this with them via private message
It is one hundred percent
Within our control to hide your identity
So if you're into some of this or you have experiences with some of these weird or things that we talk about and you wanna come on and share, we can hide your identity.
Don't worry about it, won't ever get out there,
we'll respect it.
So I just want you to know that.
So if that's holding you back from contacting us
and letting us know about your experiences
with some of the stranger things in life, don't worry.
You too.
You too.
You too can be a mildly famous podcast
or on the commercial break.
Yes.
On the commercial break. On the commercial break. Yes. On the commercial break.
On the commercial break.
I'm going to bring you in pain.
Do you want seven new friends?
Come on the commercial break.
With tens and tens of listeners, you too can be mildly famous.
We're a great news source.
That's right.
The zealist. You vote on the a-list, the a's right. The zealist.
You voted the a-list, the a-list, the zealist, and the de-list.
Welcome to the zealist.
That's right.
Only the finest white car for you.
They'll literally roll out the shit-stain gacky carpet.
Everywhere you go. Do you want the finest table next to the restroom join the commercial break podcast
They'll put you in the shitter to have dinner. You've heard of the chef's table. This is the shit stable
That's what we can offer you here. That's right
That's what we can offer you here. That's right.
Limit scenes, I don't think so.
About a 1998 Honda Accord with no engine.
You'll be gliding into the commercial brand studios with ease.
You've heard of flying first class, forget about it. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Garald, do we put you up at the Motel 7?
It's one worse than the Motel 6!
You'll die on the finest waffle house.
You'll get a gift back full of Brian's sons, extra Legos.
Try making something out of that!
Ha ha ha ha ha!
Who needs a Mickey Mouse coloring book with 40 of the 50 pages ripped out of it?
You do!
Ha ha ha ha!
So come on down to the commercial break!
What treat you like a gang.
We're all of your fantasies come true.
Oh, what else can I say?
I don't know what else to what kind of damage we can do.
Well, all of a sudden, I get funny at the end of the show.
All of a sudden, I decide to be funny at the end of the show.
Maybe I'll just put this at the beginning and we'll forget the rest.
TCBPodcast.com is where you go to read all the show notes, find out more about Chrissy
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And listen to the audio.
Listen to the audio watch, I have more, but I'll save it for another episode.
Listen to the audio, watch the video, you can contact us there, info at tcbpodcast.com.
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And that's all I got for today
I don't know how much more damage we can do. This has been a fantastic episode of the commercial break one that will live in the
Isres of history and go down I'm gonna put it on my gravestone here lies Brian green
entertaining nobody
We want to thank William our good, our great friend out there listening.
Your fan numero uno in my opinion.
I mean, there's lots of fans numero uno, but your fan numero uno for giving us this idea
today.
We really appreciate it.
Okay, I love you.
I love you too, Ryan.
And, best of you.
Best of you.
And best of you out there.
Until next time, we bid you adoo. Bye!
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in live recordings. Each episode is written and produced by Brian Green, co-hosted by Chrissy Tina Carnel. I'm going to be a little bit more careful.
I'm going to be a little bit more careful.
I'm going to be a little bit more careful.
I'm going to be a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a
little bit of a little bit of a
little bit of a little bit of a
little bit of a little bit of a
little bit of a little bit of a
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I'm going to be a little bit more careful.
I'm going to be a little bit more careful. I'm going to do it. you