The Commercial Break - Thou Shall Rewind The Boner

Episode Date: June 16, 2023

Give this guy an industrial strength fishing rod, because he needs to reel it in! No smooching before marriage, or you're gonna get the bang bang penis explosion. Al Pacino: 83 and having a baby Bryan’s in the Old Dads Club, but he’s not THAT old! They might not know their dad, but they can watch Scarface Bryan is more similar to the Bama girls than he realizes Chronic overpackers Flights are always full now! What are your dating rules? You can’t marry someone without sleeping with them first, right? How to Snag a Dick, by Krissy Is it on trend to have a submissive wife? Barf! Krissy’s mom was a Bad Bitch Queen Bee Waiting until marriage to kiss Do snakes have hands? Self control? Nah Bryan’s a pleasures of the flesh kind of guy The bang bang Contrary to popular belief, men do have self control She's had no bangers and mash! We are sex posi at TCB Baby Dante is HUNGRY Why buy the cow when you can get the milk? LINKS: Send us show ideas, comments, questions or concerns by texting us or leaving a voicemail at: 1.855.TCB.8383 Speak to TCB LIVE by calling 775.TCB.LIVE (1.775.822.5483) Tuesday-Thursday 12pm-5pm EST Watch TCB on YouTube Creator: Bryan Green Co-Host: Bryan Green Co-Host: Krissy Hoadley Written By: Bryan Green Exec Producers: Bryan Green & Krissy Hoadley Content Production & Research: Tina Khano YouTube Producer & Editor: Morgan Please Audio Editing: Christina A. Executive Director: Astrid B. Associate Producer: Gustavo Episodic Contribution: Marianne, Diane, Natalie, Will The Champ, Will D** Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

What is your dream partner look like? I think I would love to have an anchor partner who is obsessed with me, loves me, and also we can both date other people, but ideally they would sit at home and I would date other people. Then I think I'm also polyamorous in that way. I want to date everyone, but I want my partner to be locked up in a dungeon at home with no cell phone. On this episode of the commercial break... Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, a Zekiel 3-13 or whatever. Fucking Galashans 44-55 says thou shalt rewind the boner.

God said cast a net with ye penis and then yank it back up as soon as you start getting Arouse thou shall be higher and harder and faster than thou next to ye The next episode of the commercial break starts now Yeah, Kazakhstan's welcome back to the commercial break. I'm Brian Green This is my dear friend and director of craft services. Chris, enjoy. Holy best of you, Chris. And that's the Brian.

And that's you out there in the podcast universe. Al Pacino is having a baby. Is having a baby. I know. Al fucking Pacino. What is going on with De Niro and Pacino? What have they decided? At 98 years old, it's feeling more frisky.

Yeah, have you seen Alpatina's girlfriend? No. Chrissy. This girl's like 28 years old. Here, let me show you a picture over. And Morgan, if you can find a picture to show on the video, that would be great. Da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, 29 years old.

She's also been linked to Mick Jagger. She's also been linked to, oh, I can't remember who she's been linked to Mick Jagger. She's also been linked to, oh I can't remember who she's been linked to. Oh I think she was also linked to Robert De Niro. Look at her. Oh wow. So he's 79 years old I think, 78 years old. He says it's, I'm 83 and still going strong.

Oh he's 83. He's gonna be 100 hundred when his kids graduate kindergarten. It's even fair to do. This is even fair to a child to do. I'm just asking a question like a provocative question. It's none of my business at the end of the day. What they choose to do. But is this really fair to a child? Because even at my age I think for a second, like, geez, I'm going to be like 90 when my kids are graduating high school. I mean, honestly, I worry about that.

I already feel like 90. Yeah, have six or seven children have any kids. We have, have that many children and then tell me how you're feeling. It's exhausting. Well, I imagine that they have help. Yeah, I would imagine. Yeah, I would imagine they have help in every house they own all across the world. Yes, but just think about it.

I mean, I guess it's a little selfish from his perspective because he just, you know, once more children wants to make the girl happy, whatever. Yeah. But yeah, the child won't really know him. But what is she thinking? But I guess he's got a whole library for the piece they can watch. Yeah, I mean, that's true, right? child won't really know him. But what is she thinking? But I guess he's got a whole library for his thinking.

Yeah, I mean, that's true, right? I don't know if Scarface is how you want your dad remembered, but, you know, say a lot to my little kids. You can see how he once was. Hey, kids, Colombian marching powder. That's the way to go. Me like you, papaagi show me your dates Send to a woman

Yeah, I mean nothing like showing the kids what's that movie where the horribly violent heat remember heat He does such a good movie, but that's not what you're going to show your five year old. Hey, there's daddy kill it everybody. And there's this good friend Robert and he was also dead who also has children in your age is also killing people. So there you go. It's just because you can't, doesn't maybe mean you should. Well, let me ask you this. Another provocative question. What is she thinking? Well, she's thinking I want kids and they'll be taking care of the rest of their lives. IE therefore heir to proctor. I also will be taking care of for the rest of my life. Not saying that's her mode of don't know or don't don't don't know anything about her. But

it's a factor. It's a factor. It's God. I don't think she would be doing that with me. Down on the love. She wouldn't be doing that with 83 year old me living under the porch somewhere. Like she wouldn't be like, he's a great candidate for a dad. But if you do happen to be the guy who starred in Scarface and he and every other fucking movie you can think of under the Irishman, under the sun, you know your kids aren't gonna want for anything. He's been the fucking Godfather for God's sake.

That movie will always be a Popular movie always as long as people are watching movies that movie. It's a fantastic. It's great Christmas tradition To watch the godfather some people some people like home alone. I like the godfather part too. What can I say? I don't get out there keep pulling me back in. Ooh, boom. Do you like my avocina? Yeah, you're doing it again. Oh, I don't know why they didn't cast you. You're just a hooo. So yeah, my line of thinking on this is, it is a little selfish, because children children need their parents and it doesn't always

work out that they get one or either of the parents sometimes in extreme cases. And there's lots of children out there that are 10, 12, 15, 18 years old that could be adopted. You know, if you really wanted a kid, you could just go pick one up. You know what I'm saying? Yeah. That maybe has a little bit of life under their belt so that they can enjoy some time with you so that they at least know who you are. When...

I'm picturing, you know, like school play dates. Yeah, school play dates and dad gets rolled in with oxygen and his eyeballs rolling in the back of his head. Oh yeah! Yeah. Santa moment! Yeah.

Yeah. Colombian and Mom. Yeah. Hahaha. Colombian marching powder kids. That's what Grandpa says. I mean, you have the most famous dad in the world. I imagine things, some things are gonna be easier for you. Your dad is 97 years old and you're like 11 going off to middle school and you're probably gonna have some bad

things that aren't so fantastic too. And that's if he makes it to that age. Yeah, isn't the average male in America lives is 83? I think 83 is the number. Oh, he does do. There you go. What's that? He's do, then.

Yeah, he's do. Sorry, Al. Times up to punch that clock. I think there's a better chance she makes it through pregnancy than he makes it through one night. Three pregnancy. Three pregnancy. That's right.

I just don't get it. I don't get the advanced age children having like Alec Baldwin, I think it's right on the cusp. Yeah, yeah. Because he's in his 50s or early 60s and he has like five children in a row. I know. He's taking a page out of the Brian Green playbook. Just to have a baby every time your rights not pregnant.

That's good. Keep on having those children. But again, Alec probably doesn't want for anything in his life. Those children will probably not want for anything in their lives. I would assume. And it just surprises me a little bit that albicino would think that it would be a good idea to have children at that age now

i guess maybe sometimes it just happens and you don't know they at least a guy still shooting strong you know what i'm saying he's got a rock hard cock uh... yeah with medication lots of medication probably a penis pump that's just be honest about it. There's probably a penis bump somewhere in that house. And that's okay, no shame in the game.

No, no. You gotta get it hard somehow, guys. And truth is, it's not gonna be rock solid for a half an hour in math class for the rest of your life. It's just not, that's just the reality. You gotta get your EPMs and somehow. Oh my God, do I have to get my EPMs

and I'm a little behind. Because you know, when we went away for the weekend and when you go to the, away for the weekend, that kids are running all the hotel room. You got a wife, you can't just be like, Daddy needs a private time. I'm gonna go shoot one out, kids. Go to the Rainforest Cafe on me.

Yeah, you guys go look at the broken elephant at the Rainforest Cafe. I'll be here watching Bama Rush. We kid. We kid. It's fun to kid. Yeah. But that could that lady is, she's 60 years younger than he is, almost 57, 56 years younger than he is. That's an amazing accomplishment. But again, you're Al Pacino. Oh, yeah. You don't have a problem. No, never.

I don't think there's a single woman on earth who wouldn't at least go on a day and entertain the idea of sleeping with you. The reality of it might be much different than Al Pacino back in the Godfather days. Yeah, because back in the Godfather days, I can't even one hand some motherfucker. I mean, he is just a handsome dude.

And he, like, in the Godfather, he just, like, commands the screen. Oh, yeah. Everything about him says Godfather. It all says you are, he just embodies this kind of calm, cool, collected, seething, angry mobster. But at 83, he looks more like, I don't know, tapioca eating,

put my teeth away for bedtime, wheel me out for, you know, pinuckle kind of guy. And he'll forever be a favorite of mine. He's like, he won't ask I will bet. Hey, listen, I say, I actually, I don't say go for it. I say, be careful if you're not Al Pacino that you get yourself into this situation. Yes.

I know most of our audience is probably in this advanced age also. Most our average audience member age is 83, too. Let me give you a little advice. Yeah, and well, it's the podcast you go to sleep to. It's the best podcast to go to sleep to. It's the number one podcast in the villages. Well, Sun City West. We're not far from moving down there. Yeah, we'll be down there in just a few minutes. Chris, yeah, Aswin's gonna send us off pretty soon. She's sick of us.

Bye! Oh, what's going on? You're going to the villages, but not the villages down in in Florida The villages in Upper Wisconsin. It's a fantastic place to be What do they have there nothing a studio I built for you in a cabin? Yeah, exactly. You're going to have to kill elk in the winter to survive But keep doing the episodes of the commercial break We've got to service that brand new airplane I just bought. I'm a Tias and Chefschool. Yeah, I'm a Tias and Chefschool in Italy. My future is already secured.

It's already been laid out here on the commercial break. So I think so. Similar to the Bama girls that have planned every aspect of their college. You have now planned out the aspects. Every aspect of my life. Yeah. But have now planned out the aspect. Every aspect of my life. Yeah. But they're closer outfits. I'm closer to retiring than they are to getting into a sorority of Bama. I don't, as I planned outfits. No, I haven't. And that's pisses-assert off to no end because I'm thinking of all this stuff I got to get for the big trip or taking. I know. And I'm like,

well, I got to go to the store, I of 10 pairs of shorts, 5 T-shirts. Because I lost a bunch of weight and when I lost the weight, now nothing fits me. So I'm like, I have to get 10 T-shirts and 10 shorts and 10 all this. And she's like, well, plan your outfits. You don't need 10 shorts. Yeah. Just bring four shorts. We can wash them all over.

We can mix in that. You can mix in that. And I'm like, yeah, I just wanna have options. And she's like, that's not a good way to do it. You gotta plan it. And then when you plan it, then you don't have to have options. And she's like, that's not a good way to do it. You got to plan it. And then when you plan it, then you don't have to take so much stuff with me. I am the guy in the family who literally takes

everything every time we travel, because I have to. I just, I don't want to be without it. And even though I'm only visited the industrialized world, like it's not like I'm in some far-flung part of Chechnya or something where you cannot get a razor, yeah, or some metamuse or whatever the fuck I'm in some far flung part of Chetchnia or something where you cannot get a razor or some metamuse or whatever the fuck I'm bringing with me. It's just that in my mind and my P on mine, it needs to be in that bag or it doesn't exist.

I mean, I'm similar to that. So you feel the pain. You feel the pain of overpacking. Overpackers are close to my heart because overpackers know that at any moment, it's likely if I bring 10 pairs of shorts, 10 shirts, three pairs of shoes, a couple of sweaters, bathing suits, long sleeve shirts for dinner in case we go, it's likely that if I bring my entire closet, I will only wear two pairs of those shorts and three of those t-shirts. However, just having the other ones in the bag makes me feel better. I'll fall in love with some pair of shorts. I'll wear it for days on end and I'll just keep switching the shirt out. And that's fine. And Astrid points this out every time we travel. You're only going to use six of these items of clothing. Why are you

bringing 40? Because if they're there, then I feel good about wearing only those few pairs of clothing because I know I got to back up if I need it. But if it's not there, then I feel good about wearing only those few pairs of clothing because I know I got a backup if I need it. Right. But if it's not there, then I feel like I don't have choices. Yeah. Now I feel upset. So overpackers, you keep overpacking. You keep doing you.

Like Chrissy and I said the other day on the show, no one should be paying to put luggage under the plane anymore. You want to know why? Just wait until they say, who wants to put their luggage under the plane? And it's for free, there you go, it's done deal. You're doing them a favor essentially, and they put it under there under the plane for free. So unless you're flying one of those super shitty discount airlines,

if you're flying any of the major carriers, that's the trick. You pack everything you can, you get four roll-on suitcases, you take them through security. You take them to barely make the carry on. Yeah, barely make the carry on thing. They barely make the carry on things. And then, and I have seen, when I went to London,

there was a lady, because there's always a lady, there's that one lady who's got 12 carry on things. She's got four different, you know, bags, whole food bags and purses and backpack and two roll ons. And you're like, that's clearly not allowed. But I know her gig because there's a lady like that at every gate at every airport in the United States of America, what she's really doing is she's flying for free.

She's flying her luggage for free because as soon as they say, with, you know. That's all I'm still welcome, passengers. I'm flying free 31 from Philadelphia to Atlanta? We'll start voting the plane here in just a few minutes or 30 or safety checks and clean the plane. We never clean the plane. First, we blanked so much you know that today is a full flight. So we're currently on our way. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no I'm not be able to change seats also additionally if anybody would like to check their bags

We're looking for about 20 bags. We will not have enough room for them Please bring them up here and we'll check them for you for your final destination And there's that one lady I'm in zone 12, but I'm ready to get seated now with my 30 bags She brings them up and they all get checked and she's just saved herself 75 bucks. You can't knock her, don't hate the game. Have you noticed too that there are always full flights now?

Always, they have got optimized this down to you. They have optimized it. The science, it's crazy. Only when you get a giant flight. I used to fly sometimes and there would empty seats around no. Before the pandemic, it was likely, before the pandemic, like the last five or six flights

that I took by myself, there was always an empty seat next to me or near me. Yeah, like around. Yeah, around. And nine times out of 10, it was the middle seat, right? It was just a middle seat was open and that was good news. And you know, we would make a non-spoken but physical space agreement between the other person and

the aisle seat, because I was get the window, I would just make this unspoken agreement that this half of the seat would be for my things, and that half of the seat can be for your things, and then we can have a little bit more room and spread out. Now forget it, every flight is full to the brim. Full of the brim, and I even tested this theory a little while back. I was flying to Memphis on a companion ticket with Jeff. But I was coming back and I had to come back a different day and you're supposed to fly together. But I happened to have a middle seat and I thought, you know what?

I mean, we've already paid for the seats and everything. Like, I'll just let him have that middle seat. Yeah. And I was like, that's good news. You'll have a middle seat in between you. Nope. They confirmed with him right before the flight that I wasn't going to make it. And they pulled somebody else on there. Oh, really? Yeah. Yeah. That's how they do it now. I was on a, I went to a flight. I think when I was flying to Vegas at night, my plane got

delayed and delayed and delayed. And you know, they have the list of standby passengers. That list was 30 people deep. Yeah. And they called like 15 of them. And so it, yeah, I think that's the thing is that during the pandemic that is overcell now. They just oversell now. They're back to just doing this overselling bullshit. They have less flights, less people working those flights and they have more passengers than ever trying to fly.

Flying has become a real pain in the ass, but it's also super safe and it's a super easy way to travel. Yeah, necessity. Yeah, you know, I used to be like, if anything is less than 10 hours, I'll drive it. Why not? I'm young, I'm spry, I like driving. Probably shouldn't be allowed on an airplane.

Like, you know, all this of my patchouliia noise people and my dirty Doc Martens probably won't get past security. So I used to drive, and now I'm like, if it's over four hours by a highly considered flying, and the reason why I say four hours is, is when you book a flight, you can plan for at least four hours of your life to be wasted on security and waiting for an airplane.

That's just the truth. That's how it works. Am I right? Yeah, you're right. I'm the same way. So anyway, I'll overpackers, I love you. And keep on, you keep on doing you. You overpackers overpack. Overpackers unite. That's overpackers unite.

That's right. Chrissy, let me ask you a very serious but a personal question. Oh, okay. Okay. How long if you had any rule? What was your rule on kissing on a first date, fucking on a first date?

I didn't have rules. You didn't have rules? No. So you never had anything like, I don't kiss on the first date, I don't fucking on the first date. It was just like, I always kiss on the first date, I always fucking on the first date.

Oh, okay, I'm just checking. I'm just checking. I've been having it happen. I had a rule that whatever your rules are, I'll adhere to them. That was my rule. Whatever rule you have, I will also do that. Yeah.

You run the moment. That's it. When I was a teenager, there were a number of young ladies that not girls that I dated, but girls that I was friends with, who had these generalized rules. Like I'm not gonna sleep with anybody till I get married, or I don't kiss on the first, not date,

but I don't kiss the first couple of weeks. As you grow older, as I grew older, I really realized that I'm not religious, I don't believe in a lot of dogma around religion. So I don't have a specific religious reason why I would withhold sex or physical affection or anything like that. And quite frankly, I was just lucky

that I was getting any physical affection or sex. So I considered myself grateful for whatever opportunity to enter a young lady's life in whichever manner she would allow me to. Right. But as I, I don't think I've any made any secret about this on the show, like, I sex early. I was sexually active early in life in my early teen years.

And so it never crossed my mind to do anything but be sexually active. Once the cat was out of the bag, the cat was open. It wasn't like I was going to stuff the sardines back in. Quite frankly, I enjoyed it too much. I found it to be exciting and wonderful and physically stimulating as it should be, at least for me it was, probably not for any of the girls I slept with, but I can only do so much Chrissy. And it all starts with me.

So I am just fascinated, I guess fascinated not like in an amazement way, but fascinated by people who build these rules around sex or physical affection, and then they really adhere to them. So, I think not having sex before you get married in my personal opinion from my own perception, my own experiences in life. Tell me, that sounds like a really fucking bad idea. To get married to someone that you haven't slept with yet,

sounds like a bad idea. Why? Because while sex probably will be the least important thing when it comes to like a marriage or a long-term relationship, years and years relationship, it'll end up being very low on the totem pole of things that you will have to deal with and navigate. It is one of those things

that brings intimacy into the relationship. Oh, yeah, for sure. And you can't, love us and now you're locked in. Yeah. And it's bad sex. It's like going to the, some people say, yeah, 10 years of bad sex, who wants that? It's like, some people say it's like,

you want to test drive a car before you actually buy it. I like it more to bask in robins. You want to try 31 flavors, but where you decide on what? You know what I'm saying? I mean, let's just be real about it. I'm not encouraging anybody to go have sex if that's not what they, of course they're not gonna go do that

if they don't wanna do it, but I'm not encouraging anybody to break your rules. I'm just saying I find them to be a little trite. And so it does amaze me, not in a fantastical way, but I really look at people who do these kind of weird things around sex and timelines and all that. I find it to be interesting, like why? And some people will say, because God told us, you know, wait for the flesh or whatever.

Yeah, but it's more of a religious type thing. Not always, but most. And... Or if you're trying to like, you've read one of those books that are like how's more of a religious type thing. Not always, but most. Yeah. And. Or if you're trying to like, you've read one of those books that are like, how to snag a man or something like that. How to snag a dick. I remember this one girl that I used to work with, and she got engaged and she was like, I read the rules. And there was a book called The Rules.

And it was like, never let him see you without your makeup. Oh my God. This reminds me of that Bama rush thing. Different things. Like there were all these rules. I never read the book, but it sounded like a lot. What's that? Oh.

What were the, what were the three? I want to say that there were the three M's or the three B's in one of the sorority houses. You had to have two of the three. Anytime you walked downstairs or out in public, you had to have your makeup done, your hair done, or your clothing, or an outfit on, like an actual outfit, not like, you know, fucking whatever, juicy shorts or whatever. Because you were representing?

Because you were representing the sorority. So you had to have two of those three done before you left the house and you get in trouble if you don't. And I was like, wow, that's worse than waiting for marriage for sex. I mean, all I wear is t-shirts and shorts. I would never live on those rolls. So this subject fascinated me

and this sent me down a big wormhole. And here's the general, I'll tell you about the bigger wormhole and then we'll get into the more specific video that we're going to watch today. The bigger wormhole is this insane fanaticism around like extreme Christianity and that kind of conservatism. And how it is becoming invogue again to be a submissive wife and be a man who has a submissive wife. This idea that God, the husband, and then the wife,

right, on the totem pole. Some people explain it as God has a relationship with the husband, God has a relationship with the wife, but the man serves the role as leadership for the woman. I find this to be horribly outdated, terribly abusive, and really like a big mind fuck, right? I agree. I just don't like, and if you watch the commercial break,

then you know this. I'm not knocking on the religion. If the religion makes you a better person, yeah, go for it. Please, and whatever religion that is, I, while I don't adhere to any particular religion, I like Buddhism, I've studied it, I think it's interesting,

I don't consider myself a Buddhist, but the dogma is not for me, but that dogma is so fucked up sometimes, and man did I go down this rabbit hole. Oh wow. Of these people who have these YouTube channels, they get like 300 views, 200 views, and they're talking about how to be a submissive wife,

how to make your wife submissive, and they all make it sound candy-coded, and they all use the goddamn scripture. Oh, of course. To bastardize the words and make twists them into what they, what serves them best for their needs. And what their needs is, shut up, sit down, make me fucking dinner.

And that to me isn't just an incredibly outdated way of thinking, I've never thought like this. So at least in my lifetime, this was not taught to me. I did not see this in my own house, mainly because my mom was a bad bitch and she would kick your ass if fucked up. My dad was a bad dick too, like I mean, he didn't want to fuck with him either, but they didn't have that kind of relationship. No, my parents didn't either. No, your mom was not submissive to your dad.

No, I saw those two in action. I'll tell you who was in charge of that situation. I love your dad. He's a wonderful man. And he's a good provider and he's a protector and all the other things that a man should be in a husband and a family man all kind of those Stereo type for fucking sure your mom ran the she snapped her fingers that everybody came a call and your mom was a queen be dude Lovely lovely human being she was a queen bee. She commanded the room if she was in the room. You were paying attention to her That's for sure. So I went down to rabbit hole, it started with this video.

Are you ready? Why we waited till marriage to kiss. Oh, to kiss. To kiss. To kiss. To kiss. Are you ready for this? I guess so.

And then we're gonna, and then over the next couple of weeks, we'll be going further down the larger rabbit hole, which is religious submission for females. Is the rabbit hole the same as the worm hole? Yeah, there's a worm, there's a rabbit. I actually don't think rabbits make holes. How do they do it, Digg? Maybe, I don't know, I don't think so.

I'd say who does make holes are those fucking monkey chips as my daughter calls them, the chip mugs. She calls them monkey chips. Oh, oh. And they make holes all over my property. It drives me crazy. They like dig under my, they dig under my front walkway and they're always bothering me and tell, but I just leave them alone.

And then one time I was like, I was really scared that the holes were actually snake holes. Oh, right. So I was like, we had an exterminator over one time handling a squirrel problem in the attic. And I was like, we had an exterminator over one time, handling a squirrel problem in the attic, and I was like, hey man, what about all these holes in the backyard? Like, what kind of snakes do that?

And he's like, do snakes have hands? Because I didn't realize I had hands. He said that. He said that. And I go, what? And he goes, hands. You know, those things you need to dig. Yeah.

He's like, what is a snake dig with? And I was like, I don't know, it's head. He's like, you think a snake is going around, pushing mud around. Well, there are snake holes though. Yeah, they're inhibiting other holes. They're fine. They've already been.

Like monkey chip holes that they just ate. Like the family of monkey chips that's now in my belly. I found them in the hole. Now I'm going to stay here for a while and hang out. G-C-B Hey everybody, it's your favorite part of the show where I pung for more of your attention. First way you can help fill this hole in my soul, go to Apple and leave a suppositive review.

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Going on, we're the, we're the fan. Today we are going to tell you why we waited until marriage to kiss. You're not going to want to miss this. To get the, huh. I have some thoughts on why they might wait until marriage to kiss. But I'm going to reserve those for myself. This thing starts. I know it's probably sounds really crazy. Like, why do these people wait till marriage? Like, what's wrong with them? That is not normal.

Okay, and about this video, we're not making this because we're better than people who didn't wait to kiss till marriage. We're just telling you. We're making this video to make sure you know where better than you are. Because we waited till marriage to kiss, right, Chrissy? Ha, ha, ha.

Why do I feel like there's a brother husband episode coming with these two? Yeah, exactly. Our story, why we did it, how it helped us in all of that. So really, one of the prime reasons we did this, she looks like a kidnapping victim. Yeah, she doesn't look scared.

Yeah, she's definitely, like submissive. Yeah, she's definitely like submissive. Yeah, she's done with her commandeering husband. It was because we had a past that with just dating, getting relationships and that sort of thing where we did kiss and we did do more than we wanted to do, you know, as Christians we believe that sex is for marriage, you know, and we didn't want to go down that path, you know, because when you don't kiss, it makes things easier to like, it's like one less story. So like, for example, we're alone, I start.

For example, I went to a bar called Shaggies. It was all men, I had no idea what was going on. And I said, I am not allowed to kiss my wife. However, maybe just one of these men will, I can kiss because it doesn't say anything in the Bible about not kissing men. That's what I say. Kisser, then my end starts to go somewhere else

and then starts an article of clothing come off and then before you know it, bang, bang, you're done. Wives out, just like that. Like, forget Netflix and chill. Wow. Just kiss. I'm not gonna Oh, just kiss Yeah, well Whatever I'm like a grandpa. So really what What is going on?

I don't know. I mean Like you can't control yourself after just a kiss Yeah, and what is bang bang you're done as if your penis explodes when you put it in a vagina It's a scare tactic. You explode. I don't know about this guy. I don't know. My spidey senses are up on this one. We did it. It was like when I met her, okay, I just like that was one thing I really struggled with, you know, and I really believe that it like ruined all my real vagina. Vagina is one of those things I really struggled with, Christy. So I waited as long as possible to eat it.

Relationships, you know, and I wanted it to be just like a real... I only eat bangers in mash. Friendship. I wanted to get to know her for her and I felt like in that relationship like with God that I had at the time, it was sort of like, you know, like don't like use her. Like she's like a child of God, like get to know her like that. Not just like what can she do for me. I feel like you can really get to know someone by a kiss. I feel like that's probably one of the only ways you determine whether or not your friends or not. Yes.

Yeah, like being in an intimate relationship where you don't get intimate, physically intimate, sounds pretty fucking miserable all around. Actually, I'm not gonna wait 10 years to fucking kiss somebody, that's crazy. That's crazy, honestly. I don't have any problems kissing on a first date. Now, it doesn't, that house didn't always happen. There have been women who didn't like me so I didn't problems kissing on a first date. Now, it doesn't, dad, that house didn't always happen.

There have been women who didn't like me, so I didn't get kids on the first date. Yeah, I know. I mean, sometimes it's not there. It's not there. That's why you don't move forward. Or the, yeah. It is. And the moment presents itself, you should not kiss.

Why not? Yeah. Look at the pleasures of the flesh, Chrissy. Pleasures of the flesh. I've always said, I'm a pleasures of the flesh kind of guy. People's right. People ask if I had titter and ask, I'm neither. I'm a vagina man. That's right. That's right.

I feel like a lot of God. I assume we're sort of taught in this world with like pornography and all these different things. We like look at women, we sexualize them. So I knew that I wanted this relationship to be really fair. That's not a bad thing. Sexualizing someone that you're attracted to is not a bad thing, like imagining sex with someone that you're interested in

is a perfectly normal thing. Yeah, now, you know, dolling up 13-year-olds and, you know, string bikinis and sending them down the catwalk is not a great idea. I understand what he's saying there, but you can't take this to the absolute extreme and like neuter yourself so that you can wait till marriage for what?

What magical thing happens right after you get married? I don't understand. I got married. It's just the next day. Yeah. That's right. It's the next day and breaking up becomes a little bit more complicated.

Now you gotta get attorneys involved. The moment I started giving my life to God and like listening to him, things started going better. So like, you know, there's a Bible verse actually in Isaiah and the whole thing about it is, my thoughts are nothing like yours says the Lord and my ways are far beyond anything you can imagine. For just as the heavens are higher than the earth, so my ways are higher than your ways and my thoughts higher than your thoughts. Isaiah 50.

Well, you wanna get into an argument about it? It's higher. I'll have that discussion all day long. And maybe that scripture means, you know. Does that specifically mean don't kiss? No, it doesn't. And couldn't it mean do kiss? Like, couldn't it mean bang harder, bang faster,

get higher? It's a lot higher level. That's right. Some people say Jesus might have been a mushroom taker. Yeah. Yeah. I've known. So I just knew that like, we met each other

and we got, you'll have to see that video. It's right here. And the moment I asked her to be my girlfriend, we started kissing. And it was just like too hot and steamy kissing and I knew it was gonna lead to the bang bang. So like that's primarily. This poor girl looks like she is about to explode.

I know. You have to go to youtube.com slash the commercial break to look at this lady. The wife in this video, I'm sorry I don't know her name, but the wife in this video honestly looks miserable. She looks miserable. First of all, I think she wants her husband to shut up. Second of all, I sense that there's just something else going on here that's not being said. Probably won't be said in this video, but...

Why is that? Tell them. You didn't, she didn't want to do this. She wanted to keep kissing. Yeah, I didn't want to. She's a slut. My wife's a hoe. She's like, are you kidding me? You don't want to kiss like what kind of guys this? You know it's not like that hard that's like a girl Nothing is not that hard to a friend as a girl, but it's easier for girls to friends like guys cuz guys get real you know Mm-hmm. Yeah, Tommy said I wasn't necessarily convicted to do this like when we first started dating like he was the one who talked about it And then I was just like okay, whatever I like you know and convicted to do this. When we first started dating, he was the one who talked about it, and

then I was just like, okay, whatever. I like, you know, but I did agree to it because it's just like he said we knew that it was already going to a long road within like a day. We probably shouldn't be doing this. Oh my god. I know the amount of guilt. I know the amount of, like, putting on this stuff. This is why I disliked the Catholic Church so much. Yeah.

It's because you have to feel guilty about everything. You're born guilty. You are literally born guilty of sin, and now you gotta apologize your way through life. Hide under the covers. Don't whack off. Don't have sex. Don't touch that girl.

Be submissive. All this other bullshit, it all just made you feel more miserable than life already makes you feel, which is pretty fucking miserable in some cases. So why are you beating yourself up? Why put the whip to your own back? It doesn't make any sense whatsoever. And this poor lady is like, I just want some dick, like I just want a kiss and make out. And then she acts as if her husband is some uncontrollable animal. Once he gets a boner, he can't stop. I hate this mythology around men

that they're so amorous that any, you get them started and they can't stop. Like we're uncontrollable. We don't have an off button. That's such horse shit and it shouldn't be taught to men like that, that you shouldn't say that. Why? Because it preludes a stereotype that just isn't true.

You have control over your dick. You might not have control over when you get a boner. I know that for a fact, but you have control over where you stick that boner. I can guarantee you that. Yeah, and I feel too like, you know, okay, not having sex, whatever, but like even the no kissing

I can feel like that's how you say somebody to think that they're attractive. Yes. You want to kiss them. Yeah Well, these so I don't know. I don't know and imagine the conversations you have to have Listen, yeah, whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa. Zekiel three through 13 or whatever Fucking Galashians 44 through 55 says thou shalt rewind the boner. God said cast a net with ye penis and then yank it back up as soon as you start getting aroused. Thou shalt be higher and harder and faster than thou next to you. You know, like us our relationship relationship progressed it was nice because every time

that we hung out you know it wasn't that much because we were so far apart. Yeah. And we're just like have to hang out and talk and continue each other and we were like. There were so far apart was this like a long distance. I assume I'm the first time hearing of it but I assume that's true for some hearing of this. I'm an investigative reporter now. first time hearing of this. I'm an investigative reporter now. First time hearing of this. I don't know if people say that. Because it's never true.

That's the first time hearing of this. Except for the couple of times I heard it before. Sorry to tell you. About God, about school. Like we just really got to know each other really well because we weren't doing that stuff. Well, it sounds like an absolute snooze fest. If you were in middle school,

then that was good. Yeah. If mom and dad are dropping you off at the mall, and you make a conscious decision just to get to know each other, that's fine. But what is there to know? I like teenage mutant Ninja Turtles. What else?

I mean, honestly, your adults, it sounds so boring, getting to sitting around, just talking to each other, okay, I get that. Ashtard and I talked endless, endless, endless amounts. And I'm not saying how long we waited, but it wasn't very long. And that's because we're two consenting adults who really were into each other.

And we decided, wanted to explore. Wanted to explore, and boy, did we. Yes. Now we got 12 to 25 children, or whatever's going on out there. There's a dog somewhere in the mix too. So if you're dating, doing lots of you

want to be alone a lot, right? And like we didn't mind being with other people because we were doing so many rooms. Yeah. So yeah, I really wanted to be with her brother a lot. I found him very comforting. Couple of her cousins. I mean, so we were like more like

that hang out with our families and do all this stuff. Like, for me, like later on, it was so nice because when we would like fight or something would happen and I'd go, oh, it's under the world, like, I didn't have that stuff to like push onto him. So I couldn't be like, oh, like, you know, he doesn't love me. He's like, just here for that or this Because we weren't doing that stuff so I didn't have that insecurity with him and in the past I'd always had that It would be opposite for me. Yeah, me too. That doesn't want to touch me. Yeah, kiss me nothing I'd be like then that's I think we're my insecurity would be I'd be like hey, ask her not because of

Waiting, yes, Astrid. Not because of waiting. Astrid, listen. I know we've been dating each other a long distance, and I've been traveling all across the world to chase you down. And I understand that, you know, you want to take this slow and be careful. But is it possible for me to get within a five-foot circle of you? Now that we've been dating for three years?

No, I'll be back. I'm going to the bath house. You know, I didn't abstain from good singing. That's why the guy was there. So you always have that red flag to go. So if something happened with us, I couldn't be like, oh, he's, you know, he's just here for that. He's just here for kissing.

He's just here for the kissing. Just here for my tongue. These lips are made of gold in rose water. He's just here for that. I don't get this. The red flag. I think the red flag is you're not having sex. That's the red flag.

We're just in like, shut things down. It's just physical. Yeah, exactly, exactly. And then even as we got to like, marriage, like, you guys don't know this, but like the day before we got married, we got a huge, huge fight. Yeah.

And like, it was just, yeah. Yeah. This guy, just like, Yeah. It's guy. What's wrong with him? What is wrong with him? Yeah. I don't know, Chrissy. Not going. I don't want to say the inside part out loud.

You know what I'm saying? No. Seriously, I told my parents I was like, I don't want to get me. Yeah, she was sitting in her bedroom crying. I was on the couch crying my parents I was like I don't want to get me. Yeah, she was sitting in her bedroom crying I was on the couch crying her parents were like consulting What you're telling me is that it did yeah, it did more damage Yeah, when you almost call off the mayor

Meanwhile, he said his parents are consulting her yeah parents are consulting her. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And they didn't want to like encourage her and marry me, but not discourage her. They wanted her to really realize like, what are the

things? Like, what are the reasons stopping you? And she couldn't come up with any. And this was a nice thing. There was a fight about. Yeah, what was a fight about? You got to tell us what the mean potatoes were. It was probably where that she's starving for a little

dick. Yeah. No, she's tell us what the mean potatoes are. It was probably where that she's starving for a little dick. Yeah. It doesn't match our. No, she's probably like touch the supple breast. I mean, my prime. What's wrong with you? Vlogs, there was nothing that I could say that like, you know, he was like a bad guy or like,

totally. Didn't work on it. Totally. Yeah. Right. God, right. God, I would go crazy. We're off like everything was good because we weren't like making those mistakes.

Right. And if we were, I don't know. Right, yep. Totally got it. You're onto it now, honey. Oh, it would have been a lot harder for me to like overcome that. Yeah, and the thing would have been a lot harder for me. So overcome that. Yeah, and the thing was, nothing's wrong with kissing.

Nothing's wrong with kissing as a boyfriend and girlfriend. But the thing is for us, we just didn't want to get to that door of just more sexual immorality. We believe sex is good, but in the con finds a marriage. And God does that because you have trust. Anytime you've got to use the word sex and con finds in the same sentence, and it's not part of a 50 shades novel, you're probably doing it wrong.

I'm just sharing that, just saying. It's probably personal opinion, taking for what it's worth, nothing. A security, like I can't leave, you know? Like she can't just leave. Like it's just like a safe environment. Oh yeah, now you're trapped. Ha ha ha.

Now you're trapped. We loved that we were trapping each other into this. Listen, nothing like getting stuck in a marriage with a dick that won't get hard. Yeah. Oh, kids, take heed. I'm not telling you to go have sex, but I'm not telling you to not go have sex either. You know what I'm saying? Find the one and when you you think you found the one,

explore yourself, nothing wrong with sex. Be sex positive. Be sex adventurous. Do whatever makes you feel comfortable in that moment, and where you feel safe and wanted and cared for, but explore, have fun. Some of them are gonna work out, some of them are. Yeah, some of them are gonna work out some more.

But if you just get stuck in a marriage, it's true. And you've never had sex or kissed that person before, you are screwed. Yeah. Screwed. If you haven't had sex with someone for years and you're waiting until marriage,

the likelihood of you having good sex is zero. Zero. Why? Because no one knows the fuck they're doing. Ha, ha, ha. Um, um, um, of a husband and wife. And like, we believe like, since God created this like sexuality, obviously like, he, it's a good thing, it's a gift to us, but we don't want to misuse the gift.

And you know, as God, sometimes God tells us things that we don't like, but the thing is, if he told us everything that we liked, then like, we'd be God and he wouldn't be God like like it made I figured it all out Punch yourself in the penis until your dick goes down and then you're good It's me I Don't have sex It's me saying baby. I'm doing just don't want to check in here. What are you two fucking morons? Jesus Christ on the stick. I mean come on guys. I know that I get a bad rap I'm saying baby and all that stuff, but I just without sex I wouldn't be here and sex is in that bad Blessures of the flesh Chrissy pleasures of the flesh. So do me a favor get dad's computer and

Pop up that browser history and let's see some tits But got baby is hungry baby Baby Dante's under show me those tattoos. It's the sense that like there's things that like God has for our life that we don't really understand and get because it's like a parent with a two year old. I tell my two year old not to eat the whole like bowl of candy, but sometimes he wants to eat the whole thing and then he ends up sick afterwards. That's what it's like with sex and sexual immorality,

outside of marriage. It's like the more you, like the, especially with kissing, then you kiss and then you wanna go further and then you wanna go further. And guess what, you end up having sex and you're like, that's it. And when it just bakes yourselves and skittles,

everywhere. Make it rain. Yeah. One minute you're kissing and the next minute you're getting out the ready whip. It's a slippery slope. And then you have sex and what? That's it.

That's all that's all there was. Yes, dude. That's all there is. Bringing candy and candy balls into the bedroom. That's right. All of a sudden you got two year olds and candy balls and dogs lick in your anus. It's a whole scene. Sodom and Gomorrah, literally.

Be careful with that kissing, it's a slippery slope. I don't mind if you're just not like that, it's a gift and you grow closer. And it like, you know, God says it like binds you, it's like covenant-making. So I would say even if you're not a Christian, like don't tune this out, like, especially if you're a female, if you're a woman, okay?

Tell your guy you don't want to like... How do you get this? That's how you get a ring. You don't want... What do they say about the milk in the cow? Yeah, why buy the cow when you get the milk? Why buy the cow if you could get the milk? Okay, so ladies...

I don't think that's how it goes at all. Why buy the cow if you could get the milk? I think it's. Why buy the cow if you can get the milk? I think it's why buy the cow when you can have a steak. I think that's what it is. I don't think it's why buy the cow when you have milk. I don't get this at all. Not following this guy one bit. And I think I'm just about to do two snaps in a finger.

Whatever they said, two snaps in a finger. What have they said? Two snaps in a clap? Totally. No, it's saying the outside part out there. Like if you want to see, first, like, you have to explain this to your guy, but if you want to see these really there for you, like try not kissing him, try not doing any of these things. And when I really liked about it was like when we got in, yes, play these games. Oh, Jimmy, I can feel your manhood growing pull down those pants no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no Marriage I don't want any of those red flags Put your penis back What's the food? Argument or fight we can just like make out and like do sexual things to like make it okay You have to actually learn how to this guy is this guy ever had sex

Yeah, this guy ever had actual sex, like a penis, with a woman. Yes, I don't think so. I think he's getting this, makeup sex is great, it's wonderful, right? But I don't know too many people that are a million of an argument and then just start fucking and say, I'm just covering it up, yeah. Unicate and like work together.

And when people are having sex before marriage, you could just have sex to like make up sex, but really it's not you're just hiding the underlying issues under the carpet until one day The issues are so big. It's like an elephant in the room And you're just like up here in an explosion and you break up and then you're talking about explosion Yeah, he's got a lot of explosions going a lot of bang bangs. That's it. We have sex and that's all yes, that's all Have you ever had sex with a woman because it's pretty fucking fantastic Not a fact can't think of too many other things I'd rather be doing You gave that to that person and then you feel like they took it. It's just this whole thing

And I think it was easier for us to not do it because we had experience that with people. So by the time Tommy and I met, we'd both gone down that road and remember we didn't want to do it again. So that's where we set the thing. Well, listen here Tommy, don't hurt me. Yeah.

Listen here Tommy, two step. Tommy tiptoes. Let me tell you about stuff right now, yo man. There's only three things come from Nashville, Tennessee. I don't get it. So you guys have had sex before and they still chose to wait for marriage. Yeah. Yeah, something's wrong with you.

I think that was Tommy's idea. Yeah, I'm guessing that it was Tommy's idea. I'm guessing Tommy pushed real hard for this, right? We don't have to have any sex. Wait, wait. You know why we shouldn't wait? Because God said so. And I'll find the Bible verses later on at a later date, but I just know right now we better settle down or all of a sudden I'm touching your breast is, and then maybe you're clitoris or whatever's down there, and it's very possible that things could just go sideways for us.

I'm gonna go to one of my man retreats and I'll be back in a couple of days. Yeah, the men's group. Because like we knew for a men's group. Which is fine, whatever. Yeah. Yeah. So like we knew that kiss. I'll tell you something later. Okay.

The late. Yeah. It wasn't like that we were like so like goody goody. So we're just like, yeah, there's not kids like you know. Like of course I want to kiss her. Like are you kidding me? Like, but we made so many mistakes in that Department where we really wanted God to like redeem it and and he did and that's the thing Maybe you've had sex before marriage and done all these things and and maybe you've done that with your husband or wife You're living with now you had sex before you got married like that doesn't mean like that's a broke. Yeah It just sounds to me like this guy is trying

to still convince his wife. I think convincing himself. himself in his wife that this was the right thing to do. Yeah. And maybe in some sense, is still the right thing to do? Like, we can get, let's do that again. Yeah, yeah, let's go back to no sex. Let's wait until we're dead to have sex.

Yeah. We should wait until death. And if you want to find another bow to have sex. We should wait until death. And if you want to find another bow to have sex with, I'm completely okay with that as long as I can watch. And thing like God heals God restores like the Bible says God works all things together for good for those who love it. If you really trust God with your life in the end, that you know, you're not going to maybe win the lottery, but like life's going to be so much better. And I wrote down that God calls us to a higher standard of living, not for his benefit, but for our so many times the thing God, things God wants out of our lives is because they'll

hurt us in the end. But God's not like the fun killer, the fun police. He's like, huh, they'll fix for you. Know this for end. Like God's not like the fun killer, the fun police. He's like, oh, and they'll fix for you. Know this for you. Like that sucks. It's like God's God, okay. If he created the universe, like a big deal,

you're having sex, but it is a big deal because he knows it's gonna hurt you. And that's why he doesn't want it. So these things are gifts and they're good in searching contacts. Oh my God, this is to me. That's why all animals wait. Yeah, that's why all animals wait till marriage before sex.

Nothing like two zebras out there, just waiting to kiss. Waiting for that jungle zebra ceremony where they all get married. Yeah, they wait. This is why religious dogma is so fucked up. It's because these words in this book that, Christianity, which is what I'm most familiar with,

I'm sure this is done in every religion, with every religious book. But Christianity specifically, one that I'm familiar with, anybody can take these words and twist them up into a big fucking knot. And there are so many words in the Bible that you really would have to go far outside

the understanding of science to not be able to twist those words into something that you want. We could also probably take a lot of words from the Bible and make the case that he says, have sex plenty often and everywhere. Right. Yeah, because Chris is right,

which animals are waiting until they're married to have sex, and does God know it's bad for them? But when we misuse them, we just end up being the ones who are hurt. And that's what we learned. I think sex is such an important, like sin that people like me see. That's an important thing.

It's an important sin. There we go. There we go. There it is. That's what I grew up with. Sex before marriage is a sin, and you must repent, and it's bad, and God didn't want it that way

and now you're in trouble. God damn man, this is like no wonder so many people are hypnotized and mesmerized by this stuff because it's easy to fall into this trap of this line of thinking and then I think sometimes have a hard time breaking outside that box. It's like, that's what you live with. That's what everybody else is talking about. That's what you hear every Sunday. And you become so guilt-ridden by everything that you're paralyzed to do anything.

Back to like your body and your feelings. Like it affects like your future. So like even after you have sex like when you're dating or when you're not married, once you get married it changes your view of sex. So like you view it as I heard this from, I think Timothy Keller. Like when you're dating. Ah! I picked the wrong day to stop sniffing glue.

Sex is like a tradition. It's you're always trying to to be better, do better, be sexy, be this, and when you're married, it's not. It's not that at all. So when you're married and you're having sex and the feeling is different, it's not all exciting and bad, you're like, whoa, why is this weird and different? But you wouldn't even have that thought

if you didn't do that. Totally, totally. Totally. I don't understand what she's saying at all though. Totally, I like vagina, totally. So, yeah, so marriage after sex, after marriage, then becomes boring. Boring, not sexy.

That's correct. Okay, yeah. When you're not married, then it's exciting and fun. When you're married, it's like, why did we wait to do this? Because we're really weren't missing anything. But I have a feeling this problem is specific to this couple.

Yeah. It makes it even worse even if I want to get married because it's like, you just have this different view and sex isn't gonna be like that because you're married, you can do it now. Yeah, you can do it whenever you want. And that's the thing you realize like, and anybody realizes once you're together long enough with someone, you're married, you can do it now. Yeah, you can do it whenever you want. And that's the thing, you realize,

and anybody realizes, once you're together long enough with someone, you're not just having sex and elevators and go to the car and you have babies that are like crapping in their diapers and you have to change them. And these are unsexy things, okay? So sex becomes something greater than just, I have this urge and I'm just gonna get it from her and be done

You know what I mean like Yep, my brain has determined something about this couple, but I'm not going to say it out loud couple, but I'm not going to say it out loud. Oh my God. Alright, they go on for another minute or so. That's horribly depressing. For them. What's depressing for everybody? Because we got to live with these idiots.

On the same planet. Why can't you have sex in elevator after you marry? I don't know, Chrissy. I don't know why you have to be boring after you get married. Just because you have kids doesn't mean you have to die. That's not what happens. Your dick doesn't have to shrivel up and go away. Number one.

Al Pacino's habit. Yeah, Al Pacino's still rock solid, apparently. He's got a team of penis pumpers. I won my penis pump! Oh my god, well if that didn't depress you enough, go to tcbpodcast.com. All the audio, all the video right there, one location, we got you covered. tcbpodcast.com and if you want your free 21 EPM sticker, we're encouraging you. Take care of your prostate, get your Brocka gene check. Get your boobs. Get your tits check.

Get your U-Dri-check. Get your dick check. Get it all checked, kids. It's a stale. It's easy prevention. Yep. Prevention is the best medicine and 21 EPMs will get you there.

Jackulate all over the place all the time. Right. Even before marriage. We allow it. My God says, Wackoff is much as possible. That's what my God said. Yeah, we can always consult the treaty. Consult the treaty, which says, Wack Off is much as possible. That's what my God says. Yeah, we can always consult the treaty.

Consult the treaty, which says, do have sex before marriage. And when you want 21 EPM sticker, go to the website. Hit the contact us button, leave us your physical address. If you want us to say something, sign something, whatever. We'll do it. Just go to the website and request it. You can also go to youtube.com slash the commercial break fully edited episodes every single time they air here on the audio feed. Morgan does such a great job. We got so many positive comments about the YouTube videos. I think you'll enjoy them too. So youtube.com slash the

commercial break. 1-855-TCB-8383-1-855-TCB-8383- Never spam Texas there, questions, comments, concerns, content ideas, we take them all 855-TCB-8383. At the commercial break on Instagram, TCB podcast on TikTok, and please do us a favor, leave us a review on Apple. Okay, Chrissy, I think that's enough of that shit for today. I think so, right? So, what I will say is that I do love you. I love you.

And even though I won't have sex with you before marriage, I'll say best to you. And best to you. And best to you out there on the podcast universe. Until next time, save yourself for marriage. Chrissy and I always say, we do say and we must say goodbyeさあ 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が 君が you