The Commercial Break - You'll Always Have Chipper!

Episode Date: January 1, 2025

Episode #670: 2025, it's so on fleek! It’s New Year's Day! Krissy is sooooo hungover Brianna & Grace Everything’s Coldplay’s fault! Hawk Tuah Girl has disappeared Our smoke machine is working overtime again.. Football (barf -Christina) Krissy’s connection to “Penn” “Labroghini” It’s always Conyers! Chipper Jones x Bryan Green BEEF Eskimo Brothers Bryan & Krissy’s Central City Tavern days Text us or leave us a voicemail: [phone]TCB Follow Us: IG: @thecommercialbreak TikTok: @tcbpodcast YT: youtube.com/thecommercialbreak www.tcbpodcast.com Executive Producer: Bryan Green Hosts: Bryan Green & Krissy Hoadley Producer: Astrid B. Green Producer & Audio Editor: Christina Archer Christina’s Podcast: Apple Podcasts & Spotify To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

What's in this McDonald's bag? The McValue Meal. For $5.79 plus tax, you can get your choice of junior chicken, McDouble, or chicken snack wrap, plus small fries and a small fountain drink. So pick up a McValue Meal today at participating McDonald's restaurants in Canada. Prices exclude delivery. New Year's resolution, drink less. Oh, and quit smoking. And keep New Year's resolutions. On this episode of the Commercial Break. And Chipper came and we were all sitting in a booth and Chipper slid in and man was he myth.

He was hot. He was hot. He came in hot. But at that time nothing else, nothing was going on. So the first thing that this young lady does is head to the bathroom. So that me and Chipper are there alone. And I'm like, so hey Chip, what's going on? And he's like, he's like, you tell me, bro.

The next episode of the commercial break starts now. Oh yeah, cats and kittens. Welcome back to the commercial break starts now. Your face smoking crap cocaine. Oh yeah, cats and kittens. Welcome back to the commercial break. I'm Brian Green. This is my hungover friend Chrissy. Best to you, Chrissy. Best to you, Brian. And best to you out there in the podcast universe.

I'm easing you in this time. Easing you in. So that when you wake up from your hangover, you don't feel terrible. I'm so drinking from the night before. I know, look at you, you little drunky skunky. Chrissy's our little drunky skunky. Listen, every podcast needs one. That's right.

Brianna has Grace. I have Chrissy. Have you been keeping up with this whole thing about Brianna Chicken Fry and Grace O'Malley? No, I aren't the only one keeping up with that. I am not the only one keeping up with this whole thing about Brianna Chicken Fry and Grace O'Malley? You are the only one keeping up with that. I am not the only one keeping up with this. Okay, Christine is a little bit tuned in to this. Alright, so here it is. You ready?

Okay, and what? Happy New Year's everybody. Happy New Year. Hope you're enjoying your day, watching lots of football. That's a great thing to do. Drinking mimosas. Drinking mimosas, having a brunch, ringing in the new year with friends, family or yourself, which is what I do a lot of years in a row.

Now that I think about it, it's kind of sad. I wish I had joined Chrissy at widespread panic. I like coconuts. You can't break them open and they smell like ladies lying in the sun. All right. So lots of football on today. Lots of stuff to be discussed. We're here at the commercial break. We're going to take it easy on you. We're here in our pajamas, just like you are, and we're here at the commercial break we're gonna take it easy on you we're here in our pajamas just like you are and we're gonna enjoy what we usually do do every episode in our pajamas until we got the fucking cameras in here now I gotta wear a shirt every day I gotta wear clothes according to Astrid half the time I was like a newscaster with like pajama

bottoms on and a shirt now we have to wear actual clothing to the show. It kind of sucks. But anyway, it's a small price to pay to have every episode moving forward on youtube.com slash the commercial break available right now. This episode, you can watch this in our pajamas. All right. So listen, let me give you a low down drama drop on Brianna and Grace. Brianna Chicken Fry had that big fallout with Zach Brian.

She accused him of controlling behavior, breaking up with her online, generally being verbally abusive, and then he pulled some real douchebag moves in this big argument that they had. Brianna Chickenfry is a content creator and podcaster that works for Barstool Sports, owned by Dave Portnoy. Dave Portnoy supported Brianna during this whole thing, said that Zach was an asshole, had her come on his podcast and talk all about it. And it really was some weird behavior on behalf of Zach. He's kind of a douche in it.

He's kind of a douche noose on why anybody wants. Now he's in concerts and people are throwing stuff at him on stage, which I think is great. Cans, bottles, beers, tomatoes, phones. This is a new thing people are doing, throwing their phones on stage, hoping that the artist will take a photograph. Oh, really? Yes. And I think this all started, if I'm being honest, with Chris Martin from fucking Coldplay. It's goddamn Coldplay's fault. Everything's Coldplay's fault. Listen, the whole world is... All goes... Seven degrees of Coldplay. Chris Martin one time, I think this was Chris Martin, he took

somebody's phone that they had thrown on stage recording, they were like making a video, and he went around the stage and did this whole number with the phone and then gave it back to somebody. So now people are literally throwing their phones at artists to try and get them to take a selfie. You are willing to lose your thousand dollar iPhone to get Billie Eilish to take a photograph? That's ridiculous. You're right there. Take a photograph yourself. Insurance. That's true. Insurance. Yeah. Apple does make it pretty easy. Apple does make it pretty

easy to get that phone back. And now everything's in the iCloud. And a latest one. Yes. So if she takes the phone and decides to put it in her pocket and not give it back to you, now you can track her to which hotel she goes to. That's all a big ploy. But the behavior at these concerts is out fucking outrageous. Go see your favorite artist, shut up, sit down, here's an idea, put your fucking phone away. Enjoy the moment.

That's when Chris Rock, when I went to go see Chris Rock, he made us all put our phone back. Jack White's the same way. And that is the right thing to do. And I've recently seen that comedians are walking off stage when people start recording their sets on video. And I wanted- You've seen a video?

Yes. I saw a video of someone walking off stage because they were being videoed. But the video was coming from the club. Yes. And the actual artist put it up there. And it was someone we had on the show. I don't want to misspeak, so I wanted to say it was Gianmarco, but I'm not 100% sure. Okay, so, Brianna, drama with Zach Bryan, big deal.

She has a podcast with her friend, Chrissy. You look so drunk. You really do look very intoxicated. Chrissy Pahla My hair's just shoveled, I've got my disco ball. You really do look very intoxicated. My hair's just shoveled. I've got my disco ball. You are doing the perfect impression of Chrissy drunk. Drinking out of the champagne bottle. Someone get her a bag of bread. Where's a bag of bread? That's all we need. And then it'll be-

I do need some bread to soak up this alcohol. You can have some, you can go in my refrigerator and get it later. All right. Brianna, Grace have a podcast together. Best friends. They're BFFs. They love each other. The podcast does pretty good. It's on the Barstool Network.

But all of a sudden, Grace O'Malley, who's become very popular on the internet, decides to walk off the chicken fry and Grace O'Malley show. She just leaves. She has no explanation. She's just not there one day. Okay. So everyone's trying to get to the bottom of it. Grace O'Malley goes through a few standup routines and she drops some hints as to why she has left. And Brianna Chickenfry comes out and says, she was not supportive of me during this whole Zach Brian

thing, so it's best that we just part ways. Dave Portnoy then gets involved because he can't keep his mouth shut because that's how he makes his money. He just talks about drama all day. Right. So, back right before Christmas, Grace O'Malley leaves Barstool Sports. She quits, or she leaves, and everyone says Dave Portnoy must have fired her because of the drama between her and chicken fry. But no, she says, no, he did not fire me, I quit. And Dave Portnoy says, Grace O'Malley's great with me, I didn't

fire her, she chose to go a different direction, I wish her nothing but the best. Then, Call Her Daddy announces, the lady who does Call Her Daddy, announces, I am bringing Grace O'Malley onto my network to do her own podcast. So now Grace O'Malley has gone from second fiddle to chicken fry during this whole Zach Bryan drama, you know, kind of the playing the back, you know, the passenger. Here's, here's what I want to say, Chrissy, don't go to call her daddy. That's all I got to say. Don't go to call her daddy.

I won't leave you. Yeah. We're in it now. The passenger in this shit show called Grown a Chicken Fry, all of a sudden is the hottest commodity in podcasting and Call Her Daddy has picked her up and now she's got her own show. I think it's going to be called Unwell. I'm rooting for, I'm rooting for Grace O'Malley on this one. Unwell's the network.

Oh, Unwell's the network? What's the name of the podcast? I thought it was the name of the podcast. I don't know, but I know Unwell is the Call Her Daddy Network. Okay. I'm sorry. I misspoke. Unwell is the network. She's going to have a new podcast on the network. That's right. You know, just even just six months ago, that would have gone unnoticed by anyone. I don't know. Yes.

Do you think I have time to- Yes. Chris Christopherson died. Yes. Six months before he did die. Yes. Brant Williams' penis is 10 inches long. Six months before he did die. Yeah, you think I have time to keep up with everybody else's podcast network?

I can't even keep up with my own. I mean, for God's sake. When you're in here 17 days a week, you don't have time to talk about- I'm surprised we're not at unwell. That would be a perfect- I'm surprised you don't have a job alert set up. I know, seriously, I should. I should.

You should do that. Oh, hey, listen, Alex Cooper, who's her name, who runs Call Her That, any, you want to have a conversation? Go through Odyssey, because we really do like Odyssey. Yes, we do. We love Odyssey. But I mean, if Alex Cooper called, I wouldn't hang up on her. Unwell just seems like a good name for us to be associating.

Well, we keep on saying it. So many people out there, and most of them are unwell. Yeah. So now, Brianna Chickenfry finds herself playing second fiddle to Grace O'Malley. And I'm not not rooting for Brianna. She was in an abusive relationship. That sucks.

Zach Bryan is really the shithead in this whole situation. But I'm just so fascinated by all this little drama going on in the podcast network. And now like Travis Kelce's cousin is doing a podcast, and that's number one. I mean, for God sakes, it's all getting out of control. Everyone has a podcast. I was talking to someone the other day,

and they know we have a podcast, and they've been listening to it. And they said, wow, everybody has a fucking podcast. And I go, everybody has a fucking podcast because there's zero barrier to entry. Right. You get a microphone, you press record, and then you publish it on all of these major players. And if you're lucky, someone will listen to it, right? If you're lucky, someone will listen to it.

Or if you pay smartless and Dr. Phil a lot of money to talk about you. Oh, Joe, good old Brianna and chicken fry, man. Good old Brianna and Grace O'Malley. So you still don't know what the drama is between them? She didn't, according to Brianna, here's, if I'm going to take a guess, here's what it is. All I know is she left. Yeah. Brianna Chickenfry. I don't know how to say this without being a total jerk off. How do I say this? Brianna Chickenfry, lovely lady, lovely young lady, right? And she gets a lot of attention for being a lovely young

lady with Dave Portnoy and all this other stuff. And she seems like a very lovely person also as a human being. Grace O'Malley is doing a podcast with her, and the two of them are supposed to be riding this rocket to success. And then Brianna gets all of this attention because of her interaction with Zach Brian, but Grace is left by the side. So now you've got these two podcasters who really want to take on the world together, but Brianna starts to kind of, her star starts to rise a little bit in this world. And maybe Grace wasn't so cool with all of the drama that was going on with the Zach Brian thing. Maybe she thought that, hey, while you're getting all this attention, maybe you should

talk about our fucking podcast or bring that traffic to our podcast. Now, I don't know that, but sometimes there are this little interplay that goes on between people and it's like, it can really turn into just kind of a fuck you situation. They're best friends. That's why I let you just ride the wave. That's why I like Chrissy. She has zero interest in being successful. I get to sit here and take all the flack, all the slack, and all the acclaim, whatever that means, whenever that comes. Whenever the acclaim comes, Chris, he's going to be fine with it. Whenever my Zach Brian moment comes, I want to fuck Zach Brian just so I can get some

attention from Dave Fortnoy also. When is that going to happen? I wish Grace O'Malley nothing but the best. This sounds great. I love it. She's got her own podcast. Great for Grace. Just another podcast to dilute our listenership. Just another podcast to steal more listeners from us. And since our audience is currently all female, I'm sure they're going to run right over there. That's an amazing turn of events, by the way. Is it? So do you think though, just thinking back to 2020, when literally everybody had a podcast,

do you think it's more now or more then? I think it is a quicker, I think people are realizing they can cut out the TV networks, Netflix, Amazon, they can cut all these people out. I just read an article about the chicken shack show About how chicken check chicken check chicken chicken chicken shop Chicken shop too many chickens. We're talking about Chicken shack chicken shake shack. No, it's that date show Okay, I read an article about this and the guy who was writing the article said it's

amazing that she has usurped any television network, anything. This might normally go on MTV or maybe even Netflix or whatever. She has usurped all of them, has started her own production company and has a fabulously successful show and just as much reach, if not more, because she's doing it all on her own and she's got her own distribution through YouTube and all these other platforms, right? It happens. It does happen.

The new media. So I think everyone who otherwise would go the normal Hollywood mainstream route has figured out that you don't need Hollywood. Fuck Hollywood. You don't need the agents and the producers and the productionists. You don't need all of that.

Oh, we might need an agent. Thank you, Matt. We love you. Well, Matt is a great agent, but he's not really like, he's not agent, he's an agent, but he's not agent-y. You know, he's not like a slick, slimy kind of guy. He's a nice guy and I like that about him. And he gets us good deals and I like that about him too.

He saved our asses a couple of times and I like that about him too. But I think that all of these people who would normally kind of be funneled into this like Hollywood, you know, mills been shaken up. It's been shaken up. So now the first thing that you do is you go get a podcast so you can tell your side of the story, make people believe that you're interesting and get it all wrong.

Tell people wrong facts. Listen, this is why podcasters should not be at the White House. That's my opinion. Exactly. Speaking of podcasts, it is really strange that the Hawk To A Girl, ever since that hock coin went in the shitter, the Hawk To A Girl is nowhere to be found. She has not produced an episode of her fabulously popular podcast. She has not gone, she has not made any social media posts. She has just disappeared.

Probably a lawyer told her to do that. A lawyer probably said, hey, they might be investigating you. Yeah. Well, I mean, it is a pretty obvious scam. It's a pretty obvious scam. And despite what everyone involved in it says, it's an obvious scam. So the hock to a girl, no more. All right. So let's do this.

Let us take a short break and we come back. We're gonna continue to celebrate New Year's with you. We're gonna make some college football predictions. We're gonna try and keep one or two men around the listenership around here. I need a fresh drink. You're drinking out of the bottle. It's almost gone.

Oh, okay. Here, you got a one right there. All right, we're getting saucy on a New Year's Day here on the commercial break. We'll be back. Well, thank the baby Jesus. Brian took a breath, and now I will use this opportunity to let you know that we've got a brand new phone number. That's right, it's 212-433-3TCB, and you can text us anytime you want. Or you can call and leave us a voicemail and we might just use your message on the show. Once Brian gets through all the messages

he missed last year, of course. Anyway, you can also find and DM us on Instagram at the commercial break and on TikTok at TCB podcast. And of course, all of our audio and video is easily found on tcbpodcast.com. Now I'm gonna thank G one more time that we have sponsors, so thank G and here they are. Get groceries delivered across the GTA

from real Canadian superstore with PC Express. Shop online for super prices and super savings. Try it today and get up to $75 in PC Optimum Points. Visit superstore.ca to get started. The new year is here and it's the perfect time to kickstart your meditation practice. The Morning Meditation for Women podcast has short daily guided meditations

that will help you start your day with intention and focus and make it so easy to get you into the habit. Imagine feeling so much more calm and confident in 2025. Follow and listen to Morning Meditation for Women on the free Odyssey app or wherever you get your podcasts. ["Women's Day"] ["Women's Day"] We don't need no Hollywood production staff around here.

We got our own smoke machines. Fuck you! Fuck all the agents in the smoke machines. We got it covered. Fuck it, we'll do it live! All right, happy new year, we're back. Let's make some college football playoff predictions. What do you think, Chrissy?

Tennessee all the way. Okay, all right, settle down.. We're back. Let's make some college football playoff predictions. What do you think, Chrissy? Oh yeah, Tennessee all the way. Okay. All right, settle down. I don't think so. But maybe, you never know. It's been a wild year. All right. Okay. All right. So the first game is going to be before, after we're recording this. So we won't be able to make those, that prediction. That's going to be Notre Dame at Indiana, number seven and number 10. Let's assume that Notre Dame is going to win that one, though Indiana, I think, is 10. Let's assume that Notre Dame is going to win that one, though Indiana, I think, is a pretty good team this year. Let's assume Notre Dame is going to do that one. On yesterday, New Year's Eve, we would have had, you make these

predictions and we'll see if they come true. SMU at Penn State, number 11 against number six. Who are you going to go with? I'm going to write these down. We'll see what happens. Penn State. Okay. Chrissy says Penn State. Do you have any interest in college football? Yeah, of course. Do you? No. No.

Okay. I didn't think so. You know, I just wrote in the show notes, football, parentheses barf. And we wonder why 90% of our audience is female. Sorry. I went to an SCC school. Yes, I have a big interest in college football. I went to a school without a football team.

Yeah. Well, there you go. I wasn't into it before I went to big interest in college. I went to a school without a football team. Yeah, there you go. I wasn't into it before I went to school there. I stepped foot on a campus with a football team once. You dated a girl. I dated a girl and went to a SC school once. I wrote on my resume one time I went to a school with a football team. I didn't get that job though. Didn't get that job.

Background checks. All right. Number 12, Clemson against number five, Texas. I mean, Texas is good. Oh yeah. But I want Clemson to win. Okay. So you're going to say Clemson. Are you going to say Clemson?

I don't know. I'm also going to say Penn State. Okay. And I'm going to say Texas. I think Texas. I have to say Texas, but I want Clemson to win. Okay. I think that Texas is, I think they're hurt, but hurt a little bit about the Georgia, two Georgia losses in a year. So I think they're going to come back rowdy and ready to go. All right. Another game being played on New Year's Eve is the Boise State Penn State game.

I thought we just said Penn State. Oh, I'm sorry. Boise State against the... We're playing Duke. Well, it's going to be Penn State because they won. This is like the next bracket. Oh, right, right. Oh, we're doing brackets.

Yeah, it's a bracket now. That's how they're doing it now. This concludes the football portion of the commercial break. Wait, well you didn't- And you wonder why. And we wonder why. But wait, hold on. I thought we were just gonna pick the winners of these games.

We are, but it's a bracket. Who did Boise play to get to this level? Boise State got a bye. Because they're ranked number three. Yes, so they're number three. Penn State will be number six. You predicted Penn State will win, so those will be the two that play.

I also predicted Penn State would win. So it's number three against number six. I'm going Penn State. You're going Penn State. Okay, Penn State makes it to the next one. I have a connection to Penn. Oh, you do? Or Pennsylvania.

What's your connection to, what? What's your connection? What's your connection to Penn? Kelly's husband's family is from Pennsylvania. All right. Gotcha. So I'm just going to go that way. Okay. I'm going to go Boise State because I think they're really good. And why do I think that? Because they have a three in front of their...

Exactly. Because they have a three and the other one has a six in front of it. This is exactly how people choose brackets for basketball. And that's why March Madness, that's why I lose $50 every March. Cause I go, oh, well they're number four, they're number 12, they must win. Having no knowledge of any of it.

All right, and today, as we sit here, as you're listening to this show, here's the games that are being played. Number four, against Arizona State and the Texas Clemson winner. So we said Texas was supposed to win. So Arizona State, number four against Texas, number five. Who's winning that game?

Uh, Texas. Texas. Okay. You're gonna go Texas. I've got a connection to Texas too. I'm gonna go Texas also. So, so far we're here. We're almost together except for the Penn State one. All right. Number one, Oregon

versus Ohio State or Tennessee State? I mean, Tennessee, I'm sorry. Oh, well, I mean, I gotta say Tennessee. Okay, you're gonna say Tennessee. I'm gonna say Ohio State. Love you, but I don't think that Tennessee is gonna beat Ohio. Why do I not think that?

Because the numbers are different. Yeah, that's right, because their colors are better. My physical therapist was a really big Ohio State fan, so this one's for you, Mark. There's a lot of people from Ohio in Atlanta. There are, a surprising amount. Yes. All right, and then the final game on today,

January 1st, is going to be Georgia versus the Notre Dame-Indiana winner. We picked Notre Dame, so I have to say Georgia versus the Notre Dame Indiana winner. We picked Notre Dame, so I have to say Georgia because they're number two. I'm going Georgia as well. And they are looking good. I have a connection to Georgia. Me too.

My stepdaughter goes there. Okay, so we got Giawudja, and you got Giawudja. The dogs. Georgia. So really it's going to be, oh wait, it's going to be for you, Penn State versus Texas, Tennessee versus Georgia. That will be very interesting. For me, it will be Boise State, Texas, Ohio, Georgia. That is also an interesting matchup.

So my prediction is that the Bulldogs win this all. Because I think, let me tell you this. Because I've been watching all the games this season or some of all the games this season. And Georgia has had two incredible games where they went like multiple overtime. Didn't they go nine over times, seven over times in one of those games? It was crazy. It went on till midnight. It was a nuts.

They just kept on moving back up and down the field. That was against, it was against Ole Miss. And Ole Miss beat Georgia. I know. That was a big deal for Ole Miss fans. No, that was not the overtime one, because Georgia won the seven overtime one. That was against, I can't remember who it was against. Anyway, we don't know anything about football, so fuck us.

So here's my prediction. If I had to say, as a very educated college sportsman guy, I would say that Georgia's gonna win because they looked not so great at the beginning. Carson Beck, this guy who throws sportsman guy, I would say that George is going to win because they look not so great at the beginning. Carson Beck, this guy who throws the ball guy, he, that guy who throws the ball guy. He drives a Lamborghini. He drives a Lamborghini. And that's all I need to know about him. He's my kind of guy.

It goes fast. Yeah. Because nothing says humble sports guy like Lamborghini at 18 years old. I mean, honestly. You should try a 2003 Accord. He should try it. He did have a good shit. I have tried it. I have tried it. That's what I owned.

No, but Carson Beck should try it. That's what I'm saying. Yeah. Well. Grab him down a notch. Yes. Five years ago, he probably would have been driving a 2003 Accord, and they just would have been putting money in his mom's account.

But now they can actually pay him directly, so they give him a Lamborghinihini. How did he get a fucking labraghini? Anyway, labraghini went straight to his head. I think it's lamb-bra-guini, not labraghini, but... Did I say labraghini? You did. Lamb-bra-guini. Labraghini. It's a new breed. It's a labraghini. Welcome to the AKC show. It's like a Labradoodle, only with a tailpipe. They're all the rage in the Hamptons, the Labra-guini.

It's a mix between a Labrador Retriever and a Porcini Mushroom. It's a Labra-guini. It keeps your brain strong while not pissing on your carpet. It protects the doors. They're lovely. They don't walk so good and they bark a little weird. They've got hip problems. Yeah, they've got hip problems because all those dogs have hip problems.

I do. Because every one of those fucking breeds has a hip problem. I saw the other day an Instagram reel, literally in a puppy mill, like in a convention center where they were showing off new breeds of dog. And this guy, this guy was so excited. He's like, this is a, you know, it's a mix between a Lappadoodle and a Poopadoodle and a Superdoodle. It's a Fluffadoodle. And he's like, this is all the rage in Japan. It's this little tiny thing with these big eyeballs. And it was like, it couldn't keep its head up. It was a Pokemon. It couldn't keep its head up. It kept falling to the side and I was like, that poor thing, it's missing chromosomes. You can't breed them like

that. I know. They're not supposed to be bred like that. Dogs are meant to be inbred. Just keep breeding them the same. That's how it goes. That's why mutts are so smart. When they try to make those designer dogs, they end up being like blue. Yes. Blue's not even a fucking Yorkie.

I gotta be honest with you. We bought a Yorkie, but that's not a Yorkie. Yorkies are small. I have no papers. Papers. I bought it in a double wide. Conyers, Georgia. I mean, honestly.

Conyers again. It's always Conyers, Georgia. I mean, honestly. Danielle Pletka Conyers again. Jared Sussman Yes. It's always Conyers. Fucking Conyers. Danielle Pletka Oh my God. Conyers is where we rode the Ferris Wheel together. Jared Sussman We rode the Ferris Wheel at the Conyers Fair. Danielle Pletka And everybody thought we were together. Jared Sussman Yes. We also went to the world's biggest Hody Dodie Down or whatever it was, the hokey-pokey bar, whatever the fuck

it was. Oh, God, that place. Oh, my God. That place was terrible. That's where Chipper Jones showed up drunk and- Was mad at me because I was screwing his girlfriend and he was married. What? Yes.

Yes. Okay, dive in, please. Okay, all right. I got to tell this story. Chipper, I love you. You probably don't even remember this because God bless you, child. But Chipper Jones is a very famous baseball player in the 90s and 2000s for the Braves. He's like, he will go down in history as one of the best Braves players ever.

He was truly a franchise man. He played the Braves almost his entire career. But Chipper had a way with the ladies. Yes, he did. And this is no secret. He was a good looking guy. He was a handsome dude, third baseman. He could sit there all summer long and just talk to the girls on the side because he was

playing third base. And Chipper had a couple of kids out of wedlock. He ended up dating a Hooters girl. That Hooters girl got pregnant and he had his problems being faithful. I don't think this was any secret to anybody who knew Chipper or even didn't know Chipper. Like a lot of sports. Like a lot of sports people, sports man's people, the sports man's people.

A lot of sports. Ben Carson, the football thrower guy, the football thrower guy. So, Chipper took a liking to some of the cheerleaders for the Braves. They were called the Braves, the Bravers or something, the Brave Girls or whatever. Well, Brian also took a liking to the Braver Girls, he too. I also took a liking to them. Yes, he did. Well, we were down at that Brave Stadium a lot. A lot. And there was a young lady who was there who we kind of kindled a little flame for the

summer. It was a yule log. Yes, it was a yule log. It was more like a, I don't know. A yule stick. It was more like a boy scout trying to start a fireule log. Yes, it was a yule log. It was more like a, I don't know. A yule stick. It was more like a boy scout trying to start a fire for the first time, fumbling around with his stick, his twigs and berries. You know what I'm saying?

But anyway, she was lovely and, but I knew pretty early on because she told me that she was also involved with Chipper Jones. And I thought to myself, well, you know, whatever, if it's good enough for Chipper, it's good enough for me. I should do this. I should do this. This sounds like a great idea. Yeah. Why not? I mean, Chipper's married. I'm not, you know, let her have her cake and eat it too. Why do I care? So, but here's the thing. So, it got hot and heavy for a few weeks, but then I just decided

it was best just to be friends because I didn't want, I really didn't want to like be on the bad side of a professional baseball player who didn't, whose personal life seemed to be a little bit of a disaster. And he would oftentimes look at us sitting in his seats at the Brave Stadium, not lovingly. That's just the eye that I got. So when Chipper came to this bar- It was this huge bar. Huge. Huge honky tonk. Honky tonk, yeah.

Huge bar. Multiple bars, the wooden dance floor, people out dancing, everything. Yeah. People playing- What was that? The flip cup? Flip cup. Yeah, flip cup when that was popular thing to do back in the 70s, when that was the thing. Back in the disco years, we used to twirl and touch. But then came Country Western and my arm got sore. So he came and this young lady was there at our invite. It was like, it was all the 94.9, the bowl, all the Braves people, everybody was there. I invited her. She came, Chrissy and I took an Uber. It took seven days

to get there and $7,000 from where we lived in downtown Atlanta. Yes. And Chipper came and there was, we were all sitting in a booth and Chipper slid in and man was he myth. It's hot. He was hot. He came in hot, but at that time nothing else, nothing was going on. So the first thing that this young lady does is head to the bathroom so that me and Chipper are there alone. And I'm like, so hey Chip, what's going on? And he's like, you tell me, bro. And I was like, I have no idea what you're talking about. You tell me, bro.

And he was like, yeah, I bet, bro. And he had a few. He had a few. He had a few. And he was like, yeah, I bet, bro. And I was like, listen, Chipper, nothing, whatever, it's done. We're over. We're over. Chimp buddy. Yeah. I'm done having an affair with her. Now you can continue, okay? We're sharing. We're buddies. We're vulva buddies. All right, I don't know what to tell you. What do you want me to do? And he was hot. And, you know, so it, we, there was uncomfortableness for like five minutes as she went to the bathroom, where we guys

kind of muddled my way through a conversation. And then when she came back, I left. But this wasn't the last time- He came and found me immediately. I don't know what just happened. I know. I was like, okay, Chrissy, let's go. Time to go. Time to go. And then we took another $7,000 cab ride where we were like, can you put $5 on this card and $6 on this card? And I have $20 in cash. And then do you take diners club? Do you take Groupon? Remember when that was

a thing? Do you take Groupon? Oh my God. I bought so many Groupons. Oh my God. I bought so many Groupons. I think God. I bought so many Groupons. I think they forced us to buy Groupons at Clear Channel. I think we started our own Groupon. We did. Like the clear day, half days or something, clear days.

For what? What were you offering? Oh, the sponsors would come to us and then every day it was a new thing. Yeah, it was a massage place or a nail place or whatever. It was a lot of massage and nail places. Let's be honest about it. They didn't have enough money to advertise, so they would give a deal out and then they would get talked about on air. It was like a way to bring them in until it was...

I just can't believe you're Eskimo brothers with Chipper Jones. Yeah. Yeah. Well, listen, there's a lot of things in my life that if you would ask me what I regretted in 2013 or seven or whatever it was, I would have been like dating Chipper Jones' girlfriend. But we remained friends for, me and this young lady remained friends for a long time. And Chipper, yeah, and so, because I, like, he would talk to her when, you know, while he was like playing, he would talk to her on the field and he would come over and talk to her on this other thing. And so, I learned, I knew which seats were chippers,

like the ones that he could give away for his family, that his family was suspiciously never there, it was always her, or some of her friends or whatever. And so, I always stayed out of those seats from moving forward. I was like, I don't want to be on the chipper team. And up in the bar with me. What's that? And up in the bar with me. Yeah, and up in the bar with you. And then I had this pass where I could walk down in the locker room, right?

I could walk down where the players went. I could park over there. I could go inside the locker. I could go in the, they don't, I'm sure they do not do this anymore. But back then it was a little more loosey goosey. I could walk in past the police officer down under the stadium and I could walk straight into the stadium where the players walked into the stadium. And I just remember one time, weeks after this whole happened, all this happened, and I'm walking past the part

with all the, you know, the clubhouse where the players are, like the locker rooms, and Jephur Jones is standing there. And I was like, hey, bro, and his response was, yeah. Yeah. I tried to keep it cool. I was like, hey man, I don't want to fight you. You're 12 times the size of me. Now Chipper owns a bar. I think that's right. And I think he's been married for a while. I think he's been happily married for a while. I think he's been through a couple of divorces, but you know, I, you know, anyway, whatever.

Here I am spilling the tea on Chipper Jones 20 years later. It's not, it's not chicken, it's not Brianna Chicken Fry, but it's some kind of drama. Okay, there you go. You got the Chipper Jones story out of me. I shared a Volvo with Chipper Jones. All right, okay. Let's take a break, please. Get me out of this story. I probably just caused a legal action. Divorce? Yeah, there's legal action happening. All right, we'll be back. Brian might have just said it's time to take a break, but some of us have to work right

now. And by work, I mean, gently nudge you, nay, beg you to follow us on Instagram at the commercial break and on TikTok at TCB Podcast because listen, the more followers we get, the more clout I get with Chrissy and Brian. If you've got something to say, give us a call and leave us a voicemail at 212-433-3TCB or shoot us a text.

One more thing, check out our website, tcbpodcast.com where you can find all of our audio and video and even request a new sticker from the Contact Us form. Bye. I just realized that I still have the countdown going from New Year's. For a day and a half. Yeah. Chipper was married three times. He was married once from 92 to 99. I won't mention their names because maybe they don't want the attention, but maybe they don't want people that they were cheating on. And then the wife that he would have been married to when I was around was from 2000 to 2012. So, that didn't last very much longer after I left. And then he's been happily married since 2015.

And he's got a number of children here and there and everywhere. Here and there and everywhere. And that's the story. Yeah, that's the story, man. I just, I forgot, totally forgot about that period of my life until you told me. That was a summer. Oh, I'm here. Yeah. It reminds me of the blackout years.

And that was a summer that was easy to forget, yes, because there is so much drinking going on, so much drinking going on. I mean. Those were the good old days. Yes. So let me tell you a story about that. I'll piggy front off this and I'll tell you this story, you know, to get to get you in the new year. Yeah, there was a good bad old days. That's right. Like we look back upon it fondly, but some of those days when we were in it didn't feel so great. Right. A lot of people getting laid off that the economy was terrible. We thought our jobs were saved. We were so glad we didn't get laid off.

We were so glad we didn't get laid off. And then three months later, we're like, shit, we should have gotten laid off. Have that package. We should have taken that package. Okay, so if you remember, I don't know if you remember this, but we used to go to this bar,

I mean, I know you remember this part, Central City Tavern. Of course. No. It was across the street from my house. Keep me where we met every day. Every fucking day we went to this place. And it didn't matter if we had gone somewhere else, we would end the night at Central City Tavern,

or we'd begin the night at Central City Tavern. Because then they even start off at one place, and then they move to another place, so we follow the newer place. The very first place we ever went out to drinks. Next to the Mexican. Yes, next to the Mexican place, and then they moved across the street from where I lived in this like shopping mall.

Which was serendipitous. It was serendipitous. From the bar to there. You could walk there. Yeah, you could walk there. And I did, a lot. Or you could drive there relatively safely because it was only a tenth of a mile, right? It was a tenth of a mile and the Atlanta PD had much more bigger fish to fry than Brian.

And it was right next door to that Mexican restaurant too. That's right. Where you'd go have margaritas. Where I would go have margaritas and then go to Central. And then go over to the other place. It was one of my favorite com one two combo. Start off at the Mexican, we'd serve her some cheese dip and a couple tortillas and then walk over and get loaded at Central City Tavern. Then go wherever it was for the night that we were gonna go then come back to Central City Tavern. That's right. So, there was a girl that was working. That was lunch.

I know. It was so crazy. Those years were so crazy. So crazy. Oh, man, I'd be a millionaire if I didn't drink so much. So, and we knew all the bartenders over there, and everyone was friendly, and it was just like, it was like Cheers for us, right? It was that kind of place.

And this place was enormous, the Central City Tavern, and they had a bar area, and the only place that ever had people was the bar area. The restaurant, it was just completely empty all the time. Sometimes they'd have a band in the corner and no one was listening to it, just loud and obnoxious. So, there was a girl who waited tables on that side, like on the restaurant side, restaurant at Central City Tavern, but the restaurant side. And to me, and I think to a lot of other people, she looked like Elsie from, do you remember that? Oh, right, I remember her. So I called her Elsie. I would call her Elsie. Well, she had a kid and over months I wore her down and I finally got her phone number. Over months of tipping and hanging out and,

you know, I just, I always thought she was cute, but then one day, you know, we just got talking and then we exchanged numbers. And I said, let me take you to it. She was a Braves fan. She hadn't been to many games. And I said, let me take you to a Braves game. I got that pass. I can get you in and, you know, we can have really good seats. I got that good good. Yes. And so I got that good good. I got those third row seats where you get wet just sitting there, staring at you as Chipper Jones flirts with you from the third base line.

You know what I'm saying? I've shared a Volvo with that guy. How does that make you feel? Are you quivering in desire yet? How do those seats feel now? Huh? Like a poem you wrote to your last love. Yes. You want some cotton candy? I think I could scrounge one up for you.

That and a Jaeger ball? Yes. We sit in the seats where they don't yell at you about stuff, they bring it to you. They wait tables here. So, I say, let me take you to a game. And she calls me that morning. It's a Saturday afternoon game. And she calls me that morning and she says, I'd like to bring my son. And I'm like, Oh, I am in way over my fucking head now, but okay, bring your son. Yeah. You can't say no. Yeah. You weren't there. I remember this. Or if you were there, you were somewhere else.

No, I was not there. But we go this Saturday afternoon. I get there early as I always no. Yeah. You weren't there. I remember this. Or if you were there, you were somewhere else. No, I was not there. But we go this Saturday afternoon. I get there early as I always did. Saturday afternoon. Yeah, it was a Saturday afternoon. Yeah, I was an out in the world. Saturday afternoon. I had managed to pick myself up and get to there. So I got there early and started drinking, as one does when they're on a first date with somebody. And by the time she got there with her kid, I was well in the bologna sandwich,

you know what I'm saying? And the Braves cheerleader was, like we had not been together for a minute, but in this whole incident with Chipper Jones had already happened, but the Braves cheerleader was there and she was on me. She was like on me like glue. She felt it.

You were there with another girl. She felt it. That's right. Exactly. So when Elsie got to the stadium with her son, I tried to dedicate some time to Elsie and her son, but the Brave's cheerleader would not leave us alone. She came up. I remember we were sitting at this table in one of those park bench tables, like having

a hot dog or something. Me, drunk, you know, LC with her kid, trying to go, Oh, first guy I introduce after daddy's gone is a fucking lush. But he's got that pass. He's a 33 year old divorce radio sales guy. He's got that pass. And hey, the cheerleaders like him. The other drunk cheerleader, the other drunks like him, he must be a good guy.

Now I'm thinking about this, wondering how I ever managed to get laid with anybody, and how I probably will never get laid again. After I tell this story, Astrid's going to go, oh, it's worse than I thought. Oh, she knows. Oh, I know she knows. Yeah, all these stories are not new to her. These are all the stories I tell to Woola Woman. Let me tell you about this funny time I went to the Braves game.

Knocked dicks with Chipper Jones. Hey. Yeah. Yeah. Hey. Yeah. Cool. So here I am, we're at this table, and we're sitting there, and over comes the Braves cheerleader. Yeah. Yeah. Hey. Yeah. Cool. So here I am, we're at this table and we're sitting there and over comes a brave cheerleader and she sits down right next to this girl, Elsie, and she starts talking to her. Oh, we love Brian here.

Brian, Brian, Brian. He said he's always here. He's always drinking. He's always got a bunch of friends. It's so good. You know what? I've got some extra seats available. Little couple of, little, close. Let's get that little guy up there close. Chipper Jones seats. Let's

get Chipper Jones seats. So she was angling. She angled to cock-block me. She did. And she did cock-block me because when we got down to those seats, guess who magically didn't need to work until the seventh inning? The Braves cheerleader. And she sat right there. Right there, next to Elsie, right there. Unbelievable. Playing with the kid, talking to Elsie the entire time. By the end of the afternoon, Elsie was like... They were best friends. They were best friends. I was out, and Elsie was like, this has been a lot of fun. It's like that threesome that you did back in the day. Yes. Those two are in, I'm out. It's me and the kid holding our baseball vats in our hands.

Well no tiki no taki today kid, didn't get a foul ball and I'm not going to get any balls. But hey, at least I shared a vulva with Chipper Jones. He'll always have that. I'm telling you what man, it was very interesting. And you know, hey, listen, it was many, many years ago and I've sobered up since then. I'm still a jerk, but I'm not drunk. So you can, one could be forgiven for all that jazz. All right.

Well, listen, I hope all the college football goes well. Happy new year. Let's get the fuck out of here and take a vacation. God bless ya! Let's get these girls home before they kill somebody. Traffic's gonna be a bitch, girls, so don't hate me. But you get many, many days off, so there you go. Well, you get many, many days off, you get a few days off. I'll take a few days off.

We'll figure it out. We'll figure it out. Let me know how I can help. Yeah, can you edit episode 665 through 672? Oh, Chrissy. Yes, she promises. I have a Mac. I appreciate the offer. Jeff has two screens.

That's a help. Life is a highway. Hey. I want to ride you all night long. You're going my way. I just remember that song playing at the hockey top. God, that is a, that is a deep cut. From the Rascal Flats.

It was on the, it was in Cars, the movie or something. I don't know. Am I right about that? Yeah, I'm right about that. Yeah. Yeah, I'm right about that. I think it was also just on their album though. Yeah, I think so too. Rascal Flatts for a minute. Everybody loves Rascal Flatts. That's not who sings that original song. I was a big fan.

Listen, how can you not like a little Rascal Flatts? It's like- That is not who sings that song originally. No, that's not. No, that's not who sings that song originally. Oh, I didn't know that. And both versions are good, by the way. It's like some one-off 80s singer. He sang the song and it went crazy. Everybody was listening to it all the time. Back in like 88 to 90, you couldn't throw,

you couldn't turn on a radio station without hearing that song. The original version, Rascal Flatts redid it. Throw a baseball bat. In 2000, yeah, that's true. Hey kid, come on, let's get a baseball bat. Well, the brave cheerleader cock blocks your mom. They're probably best friends to this day. What's your name again?

I can't believe I'm a dad now. That's hard to believe. Yeah, that was the other thing. After that day, I was like, not ready to be a dad. I'm way too irresponsible for all that. I don't even have a car with a headlight. How am I going to take care of the kid or a hood or hood? TCB podcast.com. that's where you go. You find out more information about the show. All the audio, all the video right there from one location plus your free TCB sticker.

Go to the contact us button, drop down menu. I want my free sticker. Give us your address and we'll send you one. At the commercial break on Instagram, TCBpodcast on TikTok and 212-433-3822. Questions, comments, concerns, content, ideas, youtube.com slash the commercial break. All the episodes, the day that they air on Spotify a couple days later. All right, Chrissy, happy new year. That's all I can do. Happy new year to you.

Best to you. And best to you out there in the podcast universe. Until next time, Chrissy and I will say, we do say and we must say. Goodbye. Until next time, Chrissy and I will say, we do say, and we must say, Good-bye! I take a dick and keep on lickin'.