The Daily Show: Ears Edition - Boris Johnson's Stunning Election Victory in the U.K. | Dan Soder
Episode Date: December 17, 2019The World's Fakest News Team debates the implications of U.K. Prime Minister Boris Johnson's election, and Dan Soder talks about his HBO comedy special "Son of a Gary." Learn more about your ad-choic...es at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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You're listening to Comedy Central.
When 60 Minutes premiered in September 1968, there was nothing like it.
This is 60 Minutes. It's a kind of a magazine for television.
Very few have been given access to the treasures in our archives.
Really? But that's all about to change.
Like none of this stuff gets looked at. That's what's incredible.
I'm Seth Done of CBS News.
Listen to 60 Minutes, a second look, starting September 17th, wherever you get your podcasts.
December 16th, 2019.
From Comedy Central's World News headquarters in New York,. This is the Daily Show with Trevor Noah.
Ears Edition. Welcome to the Daily Show, everybody. Thank you so much for tuning in and thank you for
coming out. Thank you so much for coming out, everybody. Let's do it, let's make a show.
I'm Trevor Noah. Our guest tonight is on the hit TV show, Billions, and now he's got a
brand-new stand-up comedy special on HBO. Dan Soda is going to be joining us everybody. Also on tonight's episode, the British election is coming for the the the the the the the the the to to the to to to be. the to be. to be. the the. to be. to be. the. theck. theck. theckeckeckeckecketeen. toecketeen. tooom. the. thecketeen. tooom. tooom. tooom. tooom. tooom. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. te. te. today, te. te. today, today, toe. toe. to the British election is coming for America.
Penises are washing onto the beach, and Jordan Klepper is back and at a Trump rally to finger the pulse.
So let's catch up on today's headlines.
Let's kick it off with some exciting news from the world of Black Girl Magic.
History being made after the new Miss World
crowned over the weekend.
Watch this.
Miss World 2019 is...
J-Macon.
the top honor at the Miss World Contest on Saturday.
Her win means five black women now.
Oh, the world's top ti-titles.
That is a historic first.
Wow.
That is so amazing.
Five black women all wearing crowns.
Six women if you count Megan Markle, hashtag winning.
And I'm particularly excited because Miss Universe is from South Africa.
Yeah, which is great.
Which is great, because I'm South African,
so that technically means I'm in line for the throne.
That's what that means. Yeah, if she quits, I get to be in charge of the universe.
That's how this whole thing works. I also love th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho thi the theateateateateateate. theate. theateateate. theateateat. theat. the. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. the. thi. the. the. the. the. to to the. to to to toa. to toa. to to to to to toeeeeeeeeeeee. theto be in charge of the universe. That's how this whole thing works. I also love how in pageants,
they make the contestants stand next to each other,
so you have to be happy for the person who just beat you,
right, because everybody's watching.
I actually think that's how they should announce
the winner of presidential elections from now on.
Yeah, you should have both of them. and then they have to be excited for each other. Oh my God, Bernie, congrats. You deserve it. You're so beautiful.
It's like, you also could have won, Donald.
And as a socialist, I'm sharing my crown
with all the other contestants.
All right, moving on.
Every year, the Hallmark Channel releases its famous Christmas movie
lineup as a reminder that the Hallmark Channel exists. But this year, they've also also the the controversy. This morning the Hallmark Channel reversing course and apologizing after its
decision to pull a wedding ad that featured a gay couple, kissing. Do you think
Zolo could have made planning your perfect wedding easier?
We do. The controversy began after the conservative group, one million moms petitioned
the network to reconsider airing commercials with same-sex couples. The Hallmark channel initially to remove the conservative group, one million moms petitioned the network to reconsider airing commercials
with same-sex couples. The Hallmark Channel initially agreed to remove the ads. Oh, it's
on. But the move sparked a social media fury, including calls for a boycott. But overnight,
Hallmark backing away from the decision, apologizing in a statement, writing in part, this
was the wrong decision. Come on, in 2019, really?
A conservative group complained because of an ad that showed two women kissing?
What are you getting mad for?
They're kissing at their wedding.
It's the last time they'll live a kiss, relax.
Also, clearly Hallmark doesn't believe in anything,
because first they apologize to the conservative group,
and then they apologize for pulling the ad.
Now they're in trouble with everybody.
Although it's the perfect situation for their new line of cards,
I'm sorry for saying sorry to the person
I wasn't supposed to say sorry to.
Really smart.
And also, why does Hallmark even have a channel? You don't see a toilet paper channel, huh? Or it's just like heartfelt movies that take place entirely in bathrooms?
Baby, I love you, but right now I just gotta take a dump.
All right, let's move on.
If you go to the beach, what's the one thing you're terrified of?
It's probably seeing an old man naked, right?
Well, take away the old man, but now leave the penis. Rather, phallic fish have been found by the thousands in California.
Their name is about as weird as their image.
They're called Fat Inkeeper Worms.
Some think that maybe a storm pushed them to the shore.
At first sight, it kind of looks like a cargo ship of sausages tipped over or something.
Well, well, well.
Looks like the little mermaid had quite the bachelorette party.
For real, though, it's like the ocean is sending us dick picks.
What was that?
And like, I don't even know.
Like, I didn't know that there were penisfish.
I don't know about you.
Although now I finally understand why Rose pushed Jack off the door in the Titanic.
She was like, you know what, I'll be fine on my own.
Just go, just go.
Just go.
Just go.
Now, it actually turns out the real name of this creature is the innkeeper worm.
That's what it is.
And I just got to say kudos to the scientists who lot of maturity to look at that and be like, what should we call it? Um, innkeeper worm?
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, let's go with innkeeper.
That's the first thing I thought of.
Yeah, yeah, inkeeper.
All right, and finally, speaking of dicks, a football game this weekend,
that took a very wrong turn.
U.S. military officials are investigating a trou in the stands flashed what appeared to be symbols of hate.
Blink, and you might have missed it.
Military students at yesterday's Army Navy football game
caught on ESPN,
flashing hand signals that have lately become hate symbols.
Not once, not twice, but three times,
sparking outrage on social media.
This symbol, commonly understood to mean okay,
was appropriated by far-right groups.
The handshape supposedly resembles the letters WP,
for white power.
The ADL says far-right groups use it partly because it's so ambiguous,
making it hard to understand whether the students knew what they were doing.
Oh, yeah, this is a really difficult one.
Either these kids were pulling a racist sign,
or they were all trying to tell the cameraman
that they are doing fine.
Who knows?
Now, for those of you who don't know, a few years ago,
some alt-right trolls decided to turn the OK sign
into the OK sign for white power, because it looks like a w waa the wa tha thi people call them out for it, they can say, what? No, I'm just doing the okay sign. But it's like, guys, we know what you're doing.
All right? Because they'd like do it like this or like this. It's like, come on, you're not okay. What is this? What is thrown? their try to that when the Allied forces were rolling. told in. told. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. they. toe. they. they. they. they. they. they. thoge. thoge. thoge. thoge. they. they. thi. thi. thi. thi. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. the. the. the. the. they. the. the. the. they. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. theeeee. theeeee. the. thee. theee. thee. the. the. was a Nazi thing and you fell for it. Ha ha ha. What a funny joke, yeah? Can I go home now? Yeah?
And these trolls chose the okay symbol to mean white power because it's everywhere.
That's why they did it. But they could have appropriated anything. Like they could have used
dabbing, you know? It could have been like, go back to Africa. That way. But here's the thing. Here's the thing these white supremacists don't realize.
The same way they took the okay sign and changed its meaning, other people can take that
sign and turn it into something else, which is exactly what we did.
For too long we have hidden in our shame.
Afraid of who we are.
But no longer.
Now we are men who are proud to say,
Yes, we have a weak penis.
And with this hand sign that means, weak penis,
we are launching a weak penis movement
to raise awareness that all of us have a weak penis.
So if you are suffering from weak penis,
join us by using the weak penis sign
and let the world know
we stand firmly together.
Well, not firmly, but you get the idea.
All right, that's it for the headlines.
Let's move on to our top stories.
The British General Election.
Last week, British voters went to the polls for the third time in five years to cast their vote on who should rule the nation.
And it turns out there's someone even more popular than the hot priest from Fleabag.
Boris Johnson, the outspoken British Prime Minister, this morning enjoying a stunning re-election victory,
delivering the largest Conservative Party landslide since
Margaret Thatcher in 1987.
It was the Brexit election, a bitter, angry campaign.
Johnson winning over working-class voters in former industrial heartlands by promising
to break Britain's Brexit deathlock.
Damn, look at you Boris, huh?
He's driving through the wall like a British Koolade man. Yeah? It's like, oh yeah, apologies about the wall, but would you care for a spottof-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-n, the the the the th-n, th-n,? He's driving through the wall like a British Kool-aid man.
It's like, oh yeah, apologies about the wall,
but would you care for a spot of juice from inside my belly?
But yes, after running on a pro-Brexit platform,
Boris Johnson has been easily re-elected as Prime Minister.
And just, by the way, I can never get over how the Prime Minister's house is just like on the street.
Right? The Queen lives in a palace where they perform the nutcracker every 30 minutes. But the person who actually runs the country looks like he found out he just got the job at the last minute.
I had to grab an Airbnb. That's what that looks like.
So now that Boris has an overwhelming majority in Parliament, it's widely expected that Brexit will finally move forward.
In the meantime, though, people are saying that this election in the UK could have big
implications right here in the United States.
You have to go back to Thatcher in the 1980s for such a political earthquake, transforming
Britain, shaking Europe, and perhaps, perhaps providing lessons for the general election in
2020.
Two of President Trump's more moderate potential challengers appeared concerned.
Joe Biden said, look what happens when the Labor Party moves so, so far to the left.
And President Trump noted Johnson's win with its populist appeal could mean good things for him in 2020.
I want to congratulate Boris Johnson on a terrific victory.
I think that might be a harbinger of what's to come in our country.
Ooh, did Trump just say harbinger?
Somebody got a word of the day calendar?
What a crazy day!
First, Kamele gets a six-pack, and now Donald Trump's using big words?
It's the ultimate Monday motivation. I love it.
So, the big question now is, should the major defeat for liberals in the UK be a warning
sign for Democrats in America's election?
Well, here to debate this issue, we're joined now by our expert panel of experts, Ronnie
Chang, Desi Leitig, Djibouki,i Young White and Michael Costa everybody. Let's start with you Ronnie.
What does Britain's election mean for America in 2020?
What does it mean?
I'll tell you what it means, Trevor.
Nothing. This is Britain's election, not America's election.
Okay? Why does America make everything about America?
The two things have nothing to do with each other.
I mean, like, my neighbors get a divorce. America make everything about America. The two things have nothing to do with each other.
I mean, like, my neighbors get a divorce.
Does that mean I'm gonna get a divorce?
No, it just means he found out I was banging his wife, okay?
Just stop reading too much into it.
It's an interesting point, Ronnie.
But Desi, as an American, would you agree with Ronnie's a tas.
Trevor, my dumb ass friend Ronnie is too much of a dumb ass to get it. Historically, when Britain does something, America follows.
Think about it, they made the office, then we made the office.
They spoke American, now we speak American.
They deported Pierce Morgan, then we deported Pierce Morgan.
So, I'm just saying, don't be surprised if America follows Britain's lead in 2020.
Well, thank you, Desi. Jebuki, as our thia thia thia thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi. thi. thiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii's lead in 2020. Well, thank you, Desi.
Jabuki, as our social media expert, how do you read this?
Because if you look at Twitter, it seemed like Boris Johnson was going to lose.
So are you surprised?
No, Trevor, I'm not surprised.
Everything on social media is a lie.
You know, there are people who will retweet you, DMU, asked to meet you at a bar, and then you're like, yeah, I mean, your profile pick is a ten.
And then you meet them in real life
at a well-lit gastro pub, and it turns out he's disgusting.
Like an eight, maybe even a seven.
And this is all hypothetical, of course.
OK, Djibuki, but what does this date have to do with the election election election election election election did you hear what I said? A seven out of ten.
Trevor, Trevor, Trevor, Trevor, may I
Costasplain something to all of you, okay?
That's when Michael Costa perfectly explains something.
Go ahead, Michael.
Look, Trevor, I respect everyone on this panel,
but I'm the only one here who earned a polyside degree online in 35 minutes,
OK, so this election was all about Brexit.
The key to winning any election is Brexit.
If you want to be president of the United States, you got a promise to get America out of
the European Union.
We got to get out of Europe, Trevor.
But Costa, America's not in Europe.
Sounds like someone's running for president.
This is an absolute waste of time. Djibouki, Costa, Desi and Ronnie, everybody, we'll be right
back.
That's all horrible.
Like, nothing makes sense.
When 60 Minutes premiered in September 1968, there was nothing like it.
This is 60 Minutes. It's a kind of a magazine for television. Very few have been given access to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the tresres the tres the tres tres tres tres tres tres to tres. tres. to to to trese. to to to to to trives. trives. trives. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. tipe. This is a tipa. This is tipa. This is tipa. This is times. This is tries. This is trie. trie. trie. trie. trie. t. trie. tree. to to to to to to to tree. We. Wea tree. Wea te. Wea tea tea. tea. tea.a.a.a.a.a.a.a.a.a.a.a.a.a.a.a.a.a.a.a.a. Wea. It's is a t.a like it. This is 60 Minutes. It's a kind of a magazine for television.
Very few have been given access to the treasures in our archives.
You're rolling?
But that's all about to change.
Like none of this stuff gets looked at. That's what's incredible.
I'm Seth Done of CBS News.
Listen to 60 Minutes, a second look.
Starting September 17th, wherever you get your podcasts
you know him from the showtime series Billions and he's got a new HBO comedy special called Son of a Gary dance order
to the showtime series Billions and he's got a new HBO comedy special called Son of a Gary dance
soda! comedy special called Son of a Gary. Danceoda! Welcome to the show.
Thank you for having me, Trevor.
What a crazy journey this has been. Not just for you, but for me as well. Like a lot of people
wouldn't know this about this unless I told them but like when I started doing comedy in America. One of the first place as I started told it. the the comedy cellar. Yeah. And that's where you were also, you were also like you, you, you, you, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, the th, th, th, the th th the th th th the th th the th th tho, tho, tho, the tho, the tho, tho, the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th, th, th. th, th. th. th, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. tho, tho, tho. thooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo. to to thoo. tho. th. th. th know this about this unless I told them but Like when I started doing comedy in America one of the first places I started was at the comedy seller. Yeah
And that's where you were also like we were there almost every single night
Nightly.
Working jokes. Yeah and now here you are on showtime like a hit series and now you're like a full-time regular and you got an HBO special. It's been an an special. Yes, thank you very much. Learn to blackmail people.
Learn to blackmail people and you'll get all the jobs you want.
Let me ask you this.
Do some people get confused because they go like, wait, the guy from Showtime is doing comedy?
Like do people not know that you were in comedy first?
At all?
At all.
At all.
HBio came and saw me at the comedy seller. I ran an hour and then after the show, they were like, we're gonna, I think we're gonna give
you an hour.
And this guy's sitting there in a fleece vest and he goes, you do comedy?
And he goes, you do comedy?
And I go, yeah.
And he goes, you're on billions.
I was like, yeah.
And he goes, believe I do comedy. It was insane. I was like, what world am I in?
A lot of people love your special because, like, here's one thing I've liked about you.
I've always loved that you are, I mean, what some people would call an edgy comic, but
you're not like, you know, you know, there's some comics who or not. I don't know. No, but I mean, you see it in special.
You're not trying to be a jerk, are you?
No, no, but you're not there.
You don't come off as a jerk, you just come off as someone who sees the world in a certain way.
Like, for instance, talking about your life, growing up, like smoking as a kid, it more and then you would understand where they're coming from. I love Frido's original. That lets you know a lot about me. I love a nice old bag of Frido Scoops. But it is, it's
like, you know what's funny is you put out a special this year, I put out a special, the
title's so similar yet completely different in meanings. That's, I saw that because mine is son of Patricia named after my mom. On Netflix, right? But then yours, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. It's, th. It's, th. It's, th. It's, th. It's, th. It's, th. It's, th. It's, th. It's, to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to th. I's, th. I's, th. I's, th. I's, th. I's, th. I th. I th. It's, th. It's, to to to to th. It's, th. It's, th. It's, th. It's, th. It's th. It's the. I the. I'll the. the. the. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. I to to stream now. But then yours is called Son of A Gary.
That A is the biggest difference in the world.
Because Son of Patricia, awesome.
What a lovely homage to your mother.
Almost like a Game of Thrones title.
Yes, that's what it is.
You're like, Son of Patricia, bringer of laughs.
That's it. Mine's like, son of a Gary, and it's like, and it, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, the the the the the the the the the the the the the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th. th. thi, thi, thi, thi, thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. the the the the it's like, I'm here even though I had that awful of
a father.
Mine's like, you real son of a Gary.
You know, it's like, yeah, it's a nice way.
Let's flip, there's dudes out there that are dicks that need credit.
So my dad, yeah.
This is interesting because like, you talk about things in the specialsthat a lot of people would be like, man, that is so painful, but it's one of the funniest specials around.
You talk about your dad, who passed away as well.
And then some people will be like, you can't make jokes about that.
That's not funny.
How can't you talk about death?
The people that always make that jokes, then say that, and they go and call and they're their their their their their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, tho, tho, tho, tho, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their their their their their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their............. their, their, their, their, their, their, their, ta, ta, ta? And it's like, how are you telling me what I can and cannot joke about?
Right.
That's the thing about comedy.
What I love is there's so much variety out there, but you can really in comedy, find the
thing that you want to joke around about.
Right.
And it's always, the survival technique is the technique. the survival technique is th technique is th technique is the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. the, the, the, the. the. the. That's the. the. the. that that that that that the. that that that that that that the. That's that thi. That's thi. That's the. That's the. That's the. That's th. That's th. That's th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. theeee. theee. theeee. thee. the. a little bit. As a comedian, though, do you ever look back on your comedy?
I know this happens to me, but like a lot of the time
with comedians, we have this thing that started,
especially with like online culture now.
Sure.
Not even like tweets and stuff, like,
websites where they're try Dan, you said this 20 years ago. Yeah, and then I just queue up the part where I say I'm white trash.
And I'm like, what's up?
Proofs in the pudding, buddy.
I've been, I've been who I've been.
My favorite one is the criticisms I've gotten on this.
It's been overwhelming how great.
All the compliments I've got from the guy was like, you look like you have small hands. And that was the only tweet.
And I was like, yeah, you know, I had a procedure done in Brazil to shrink my hands.
What a weird thing just to watch a whole hour of comedy and be like, what's the one thing you focus on?
Is the hands?
And I got paws, dude.
See me on the basketball court.
I will squat you. Here's the thing I want to know about you and online. You don't seem to take it seriously, and I've noticed that you're like not online anymore.
You are, but you're not.
Oh, it's the best.
I'm living in 2007, baby.
No, but really, I want to know, like, did you, did you, did you delete your things?
Because sometimes I'll see like a God, I'm off it. I'm off it.
I took Twitter off my phone in October of 2018,
and it was the greatest thing I ever did in my life.
And I recently took Instagram off, and then I, by the way,
these companies are like, don't listen to this man.
Do not listen this man. like like motion sick but while I was standing still. I would have these incredible experiences that would be ruined.
Like my girlfriend and I would be out of this awesome thing
and then all of a sudden look down like,
Dan Soter never made me laugh and you're like,
I want to fight you.
And it's like, I'm not enjoying the thing because I'm looking at Trent in Iowa,
who's got like, bulldog for his profile picture and I'm like, why do you hate me? It was just ruining so much stuff that I was like,
once I took it off, now I check when I'm at home on my computer,
or I'll download Instagram, upload something and then delete it off my phone,
and then to be like, oh, you know what I'm doing now?
Checking my emails a lot. So that's where I need to send the hate the hate the hate the hate to to send to send to to send to send to to send to to to to send to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to me.. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to th......... I... I's to to the tho. the the the the the the the tho.o.o.a.a.a.a.a.a.a. the the the the the the the the the.a.a.a.a.a..a.............. the hate. I'm a nerd. Yeah. That's why I'm going to send those email.
Dear dad, you've never made me laugh.
I'm like, T.D. Noah is persistent at Hotmail?
No, man, that's one thing I would never say about you.
Truly, I've always said this to you off on the show. I hope everybody watches it. Son of A. Gary is currently available on HBO Go and HBO Now.
You want to check it out. Dance on it, everybody.
Thanks, guys.
The Daily Show with Covernoa, ears edition.
Watch the Daily Show, weeknights at 11. 10 Central on Comedy Central and the Comedy Central app.
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for exclusive content and more. a Comedy Central Podcast. When 60 Minutes premiered in September 1968, there was nothing like it.
This is 60 Minutes.
It's a kind of a magazine for television.
Very few have been given access to the treasures in our archives.
But that's all about to change.
Like none of this stuff gets looked at. That's what's incredible. I'm Seth Done of CBS News.
Listen to 60 Minutes, a second look
on Apple podcasts, starting September 17.