The Daily Show: Ears Edition - From the Archives: Roxane Gay - June 12, 2017
Episode Date: May 22, 2018"Hunger" author Roxane Gay recounts the horrific childhood attack that led to her weight gain and describes the ridicule and unsolicited advice she receives from strangers. Learn more about your ad-c...hoices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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Hey everybody, John Stewart here.
I am here to tell you about my new podcast.
The Weekly Show is going to be coming out every Thursday.
So exciting. You'll be saying to yourself, TGID.
Thank God it's Thursday we're going to be talking about.
All the things that hopefully obsess you in the same way that they obsess me. The election. Economics. Earnings calls. What are
they talking about on these earnings calls? We're going to be talking about
ingredient to bread ratio on sandwiches. And I know that I listed that fourth, but in importance,
it's probably second.
I know you have a lot of options as far as podcasts go, but how many of them come out
on Thursday?
I mean, talk about innovative.
Listen to the weekly show with John Stewart, wherever you get your podcast.
My guest tonight is a best-selling author whose new book is called Hunger, A Memoir
of My Body.
Please welcome, Roxanne Gaye.
Welcome.
Welcome.
Welcome.
Thank you.
Welcome to the show. I know you from your writings. I know you from your columns. Many people know you from topics that range from feminism
to politics, to social commentary.
But this book is something different.
This book is a memoir that takes us through your life.
In a way that I don't think anybody would expect,
it takes us through your life through the prism of eating,
and through the prism of being a fat person living in the world.
Yes.
Why did you choose to write it in this way?
Because I didn't want to write it at all.
But as I was thinking of what I wanted my next nonfiction project to be,
I wanted to tell the story of my body because when you're fat, people have
assumptions about who you are and why you're fat and they think you're stupid. Like yesterday, someone emailed me.
Do you know that exercise is required to lose weight?
No.
Never occurred to me.
And so, you know, I think it's important to show
like what it's actually like to live in this world, in a fat body.
It's a journey that you take us on. There's a part of the book that that that that that that that that that thiiioliolioluu. that thiolu. thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thi. thin, thin, thin, thi,take us on and there's a part of the book that really caught me in
where you talk about the underlying story of being fat that many people have that no one
knows about.
Yes.
You know, you talk in the book about Oprah and her journey and then what's really heart-wrenching
is the story that you tell in the book and that is you were gang raped at 12 years old. Yes, I was.
And that led to a journey of hating yourself, hating your body.
How did that come to be?
How does your world collapse?
I know you write about it in the book, but I mean,
how does that happen?
I, you know, when I was 12, this thing happened, and it was so unexpected and I was a good Catholic girl and so I didn't even know like what sex was, I mean I knew the technicalities, but I did not know what rape was.
Right. I certainly didn't know that you could be with more than one person. And so my world was shattered in the aftermath and I just thought I want to be stronger, I want to be bigger and so I thought if I eat a lot if thoubles won't do this again because I'll be the the their their their their... their. their. their. their. their. their. their. I their. I their. I their. I their. their. their. th. th. th. th. thi. I thi. I their. I thi. I their their. I their. I their. I their. I their. I their. I their. I their. I their. I their. I their. I their. I their. I their. I their. I their. I their. I their. I their. I their. I their. I their. I their. I their. I their. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I the. te. te. te. tea. te. thea. the. the. the. I the. I the. I the. I the. I thought if I eat a lot those boys won't do this again because
I'll be able to fight them next time. Right. And they won't want to do this
because I'll be fat and boys don't like fat girls. And so in many ways it was a
deliberate choice and of course looking back at my girl talk to mom and dad
but you know 12-year-olds with secrets hold on to them very tightly. And that was something you didn't thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi tho tho tho-s thi thi tho-I tho-I tho-I tho-I tho-I they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they'll thi. I thi. I thi thi thi. I thi. I to theeeeeeeeeat tm-s. I'll tm-s. I'll tm-s. I'll theeeeeeeeeee. I th them very tightly and that was something you didn't do
You didn't talk to mom and dad. Why? I was really scared because I believed everything that we learned in church
About premarital sex being a sin and I was absolutely certain that I was going to hell and then those boys went to school The following day and told everyone a different story that I wanted it and so everyone started calling me a slut and I just knew nobody? to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the to the the the the the the the the the the to??? the the the the the told? the told? told?? their? their told? thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. thea.??????? their?? their? their? their? their? their? their? their? their? their? I? I their? I their their their their their their their their their their their te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. I. te. I was. te. te. te. I was. I was wanted it. And so everyone started calling me a slut,
and I just knew nobody would believe me,
because it was going to be my word against these guys.
When you tell the story of how that changed your life
and how that became a part of who you are today,
you talk a lot about the consequences of living in a world
that sees fat a certain way.
Now I won't deny, as a comedian and as a person, I've made a ton of fat jokes in my life.
And there was a time when fat was seen as a novelty, as a choice.
America's now gotten to a place where people are realizing it's an epidemic, they're realizing
that there are effects.
Yes. What are some of the effects that you've dealt with living in th, th th th th th th th th th th as a th as a thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi theateate the the the the the the the that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that th that th th th as a th as a th as a th as a th as a th as a th as a th as a that that that that that that that that that that, that, that, that, to to to to to that, that, to that, that, that that that that that that that, they're realizing that there are effects. Yes. What are some of the effects that you've dealt with living in your body?
Well, you know, there are a lot of things that you encounter.
Like at the grocery store, people make commentary on what they see in your cart.
They'll take food out of your cart.
Wow. Yeah, realness.
And they send you unsolicited advice.
I'm a writer and I do events,
and I've had people come up to the signing line
and offer me nutritional advice.
I'm sorry, it's just insane.
You know, the world doesn't fit,
you don't fit in the world oftentimes.
I write in the book that the bigger you become,
the smaller your world gets because, you can't necessarily fit in the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the smaller your world gets because you know you can't necessarily fit in theater seats and airplane travel is such a pain because those seats are not
roomy for anyone and so you either have to buy two tickets and then the airline is
like why did you buy two tickets or you buy one ticket and you encroach on
someone else's space and they're like why didn't you buy two tickets and so no matter what you do you to fit? And the the their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their. their. I I their. I their. I their. I their. I's their. I'm their. their. their. their. their. their is their is their. their. their. their. their. their. their is their is their is their is their is their is their is their is their is their is their is their is their is their is their is their is their is their is their is their. It's is their. It's te. It's te. It's te. tea. tea. tea. tea. tea. tea. tea. tea. tea. te. te. te. tickets. And so no matter what you do, you can't fit. And the world is not really interested in creating a space for you to fit.
People just judge you and they say, you know, you're going to die nine years younger,
which, why do you care?
And then they think you're draining the health care system as they smoke a cigarette.
And so it's just a constant sense that you don't belong and people feel no compunction about being cruel about it.
It's interesting that you tell the stories in the way you do,
because many people will write a book as a story of triumph,
as a story of like, and this is how the ending was happy,
and this is how I overcame.
This is an honest journey that takes us through it. You don't want us to feel sorry for you, but you want us to know the reality of the world that you live in.
Was there a part of you that didn't want to write it because of that?
Yeah, definitely.
Because generally when people write about weight,
there's like a woman standing in half of her fat pants on the cover and she's smiling, like, like, look, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, th. th. th. th. th. thi, like, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the the, the the, th. thi, thi, thi. thi. thr. thr. thr. thr. thr. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. the the the the the the write that book. So I was like, I can stand in my fat
pants and it'll just be that. And people, you know, they want a triumphant
narrative. They want to believe that you have solved the problem of your body.
But my body is not a problem and it certainly isn't something I've
solved yet. I'm still just trying to figure out how do I have now that I'm as fixed as I'm ever going to be, a normal
relationship to food and eating, and how do I write my story in a way, it's not about self-pity,
it's just this is my story instead of whatever it is that you're going to project on to me.
So I was really nervous because there isnto that 12-year-old goal,
yes.
If Roxanne could travel back in time in the book,
what would you say to her?
Oh my god, I would just tell her to talk to your parents,
trust them to help you.
If I had opened up at any point, I think my life would have taken a far different turn. I don't know that it would have been like significantly better, but I know that I would
not have turned to the coping mechanisms I did because they would have helped me get the
kind of help you're supposed to get when you endure this kind of a trauma.
It's interesting that the book is called Hunger because when you open it and
when you start you think that it's the the book the book hunger seems to transcend more than just the physical. Absolutely. It feels
like it's a craving for more than just what is on a plate and what is served in
a restaurant and it's it's honestly it's an amazing story and I can only thank
you for sharing it with us. Thank you so much. Thank you so much.
Thank you so much.
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This has been a Comedy Central podcast.
Hey everybody, John Stewart here. I am here to tell you about my new podcast, The Weekly Show, it's going to be coming out every Thursday.
So exciting, you'll be saying to yourself, TGID. Thank God it's Thursday. We're
going to be talking about all the things that hopefully obsess you in the same way
that they obsess me. The election. Economics. Earnings calls. What are they talking about on
these earnings calls? We're going to be talking about ingredient to bread ratio on sandwiches. And I know that I listed that fourth, but in importance it's probably
second. I know you have a lot of options as far as podcasts go, but how many of them come out on Thursday?
I mean, talk about innovative.
Listen to the weekly show with John Stewart, wherever you get your podcast.