The Daily Show: Ears Edition - Marlon Wayans Tackles The Debate Over Reparations In California | Mason Gooding
Episode Date: March 7, 2023Marlon Wayans tackles the day's biggest news including updates from CPAC, Memphis Grizzlies point guard Ja Morant's suspension for flashing a gun on Instagram, and the debate over reparations in Calif...ornia. Actor Mason Gooding discusses reprising his role as Chad in “Scream VI” and how the latest installment of the slasher franchise is more violent and scarier than the previous Scream films.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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You're listening to the Dalyze show.
I am your host, Marlon Waynes.
I know you're asking yourself, how the tel.
Welcome to the Daly show. I am your host, Marlon Waynes. I know you're asking yourself how to fuck did I become the host well they's on the wheel with all the Wayne's name
on it and it landed on me
that
That's right as you know my entire family's in the business we'll like the trumps
except my dad doesn't want the business. We're like the Trumps.
Except my dad doesn't want to f-fie my sister.
All right, let's get into headlines. It was a great weekend for comedy specials. I know my brother Chris Rock had his thing and I also had a new special come out.
God Loves Me, available right now on HBO Max.
Brothers, you can't bootleg streaming.
But you can share passwords.
But you can share passwords.
But let's be real.
The funniest comedy special last weekend was the CPAC.
Or as I like to call it, crazy white people.
If you don't know about it, it's an annual event with all the Karens and their husbands
come together and they complain about the rest of us.
The Karen's and the Darens. The Cairns and the Darins.
And we watched it.
So you didn't have to.
The Biden administration sucks.
This can never be said at a Democrat gathering.
Look at all the beautiful women here.
Wokeness is a virus more dangerous than any pandemic hands down.
We will support baby boomers. we will support baby bonuses for a new baby boom.
How does that sound? That sounds pretty. I want our baby boom.
To use a strong couple of words, insane asylum. That's where anybody see silence of the lamb?
That's where they come from.
Check under your seats.
If there happens to be a gold chocolate bar underneath there, that's a VIP.
Oh, I'm not joking.
That's a VIP ticket to my father's reception tomorrow at CPAC. What the fuck is with his fingers?
Why does he have hot dogs fingers from everything everywhere all at once?
It looks like 10 limp dicks playing piano.
It looks like 10 limp dicks playing piano.
I like how Donald Jr. is always like,
Democrats are pedophiles.
Anyway, if you come with me, I'll give you chocolate.
But you know what? I'd like to invite everyone here to look under their seats.
Please, go ahead, look under your seats.
Look.
Does anyone see my airpods? to look under their seats? Please, go ahead, look under your seats. Look.
Does anyone see my airpods? I've been looking all over for them.
I hate those little tricky white bitches.
The worst part about the stunt is that Trump was leaving chocolate balls on the floor.
You know who's gonna find that? A rat. A rat is going
to show up and be like, where the fuck is Donald? I got ideas, man. Borda wall, we need
a border maze. If they get past that, bam, stick your pads, bitch! But it wasn't just Don Jr. All these people are wildly.
Some of those guys was throwing shots too. It went from Seapoc to Tupac real quick.
They were like, first off, F. Pronouns on the gender your claim.
Some of those guys were throwing shots too. It went from C-Pock the gender your claim. And some of that shit
make no sense at all. Like Nikki Haley said,
wokeness is more dangerous than a pandemic.
I never had to miss two weeks of work because of
wakness. And I'm damn sure Herman Kane didn't die because he walked into a
gender neutral bathroom.
Now, let's move on to sports.
We all know the NBA stopped calling players for carrying a long time ago.
But apparently, you can still get in trouble for carrying a gun.
Memphis Grizzly standout point guard, John Morant is facing scrutiny after appearing a threaten. But apparently you can still get in trouble for carrying a gun.
Memphis Grizzly standout point guard, John Morant, is facing scrutiny after appearing
to flash a gun in a video shared on his Instagram live.
The Grizzly's announcing the All-Star will be sitting out at least two games as the
NBA conducts an investigation of what he did live on Instagram.
Seen here showing off a gun at a night, hours after his team lost Friday night.
Morant has since apologized, saying in a statement, I'm going to take some time away to get
help and work on learning better methods of dealing with stress and my overall well-being. I'm sorry, but that n-d-n-doh look stressed at all.
Look at all the stress on this face.
I've never seen somebody so stressed.
Fee-li this is stressed.
How's that even an explanation? I pulled the gun out because I was stressed.
So is that like an emotional support gun?
Like who grabs a gun because you're stressed?
B. You never heard a camera meal?
I'm just saying I think mental health issues have been too disstigmatized.
Even guys trying to act gangster like, y'all
I'm gonna let you off because my therapist says this misplace anger.
I need to go home and unpack these shit on me.
I gotta assume some accountability for this man, you know what I'm thin?
But also, what the fuck is up with the tiny gun?
It's so tiny. It looks like a gun that the sexy Russian lady pulls out in a bond movie.
He went to the gun store and asked for a pussy galore.
I've never seen a man pull out a gun and be less threatening.
We got beat.
How you hold your gun like this?
The gangs in West Side Story were more threatening than that.
And they were singing show tunes.
And finally, let's move on to a lighter subject. Slavery. Most people now
agree that slavery was wrong, but apparently California is the only one that feels bad about
it. California will soon decide whether or not to give reparations to its black citizens.
Right now the California Task Force is meeting in Sacramento to assess how much each
citizen might receive.
One consideration is roughly $360,000 per eligible resident.
The task force is still working to determine what it believes reparations should involve,
which could include cash payments, grants, and tuition assistance.
There's only one thing that would stop our children from busting into these liquor stores and grocery stores
stealing junk food and stealing different things and that's reparations.
There's only one thing that would stop our kids from busting into these jewelry stores stealing
watches and jewelry and that's reparations.
Daret, I agree with the monopoly man.
We need to let black people pass go and collect $200.
It's time for some free parking, damn it.
I just love how he was getting more threatening that he was talking.
We need reparations.
Otherwise, we're going to rob liquor stores and jewelry, bitch.
I stole this mother's fucking watch.
You can see all the black folk behind him like, ugh.
Was this the best guy we could get to represent us?
He looked so sophisticated with the little hat on.
And you seem to watch?
It was nice till I found out he stole it.
I don't know where they're getting the money from, but I know where they should
get it from. Fruit of the loom.
They always saying that shit is 100% cotton pay up, bitch.
And they said every black person is going to get $360,000.
What if you're mixed?
You only get half? So the Zendiah is only good for $180,000. What if you're mixed? You only get half? So the Zim Dyer is only good for
180K? So what does Chet Hanks get?
Go sucker your mama duck, your sink and grotty. Spit put your gritty gritty gritty
gritty grilles. That wigger got to be worth at least 25 grand.
For more on these reparations, we go to Roy Wood Jr.
Hey, what's up?
What's up?
Yeah. Yeah.
Hey, homie, what's cracking?
What's cracking, Marlin?
Good to see you. What's up? What's sigh?
Yeah. Why are you talking like that?
That's how we always talk out here in Cali in the Bay Area. You smell me? Westside,
Van Nuys, chicken and waffles, too short, serves up, Snowfall, Franklin Saint, you know what I'm saying?
Matter of fact, let me put on my authentic Cali hat. See, see? See, see, boom, see. See, now I look like the homie. I look just like the homie.
He from Cali, I'm from Cali.
Stop it.
You're from Alabama.
Stop talking like that.
You shout like Chet Hanks.
Go hat and play along.
Black people are all about to start claiming California.
I'm trying to get mine first.
It's the black gold rush. It's trying to get paid.
You know, I will say I'm surprised that out of all the states is California that's proposing
reparations. Oh definitely, definitely. It is a big surprise. You know, you got to get props
to California, my home state, for doing this. You know, they did it before Alabama,
before Georgia, before South Carolina, and California was a free state.
Most of the slaves in California was just people playing slaves and movies.
Jamie Fox, LaVarburton, Cynthia Arrevo, Amistot.
You mean Jainman Hansu? His name ain't Armistad.
Well, I guess there's always Black History Month. I learned something new.
Roy, one reason why I know you're not from California is because you think 360 grand can
take you far.
It may take you far in Alabama, but not LA.
That's going to dry up real quick after rent gas and cocaine.
Okay.
True, you're right.
So then how about this.
Instead of splitting up the reparation money,
you know, amongst all the black folks,
into every black person into a reparations lottery,
and one person gets all the money.
Like, it's like Powerball but for slavery.
You armed or something, I like that.
Yeah. Black Power ball.
Yes, exactly. But a lottery, man, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's thi. Right. Right. Right, that's that's that's that's that's that's, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Black tower ball. Yes, exactly.
Yeah.
But a lottery, man, that's a dumb idea for reparation.
You think it's dumb.
You think it's dumb.
A bunch of black people you think that's dumb.
You, of all people, should support a lottery, Marlon.
Statistically speaking, the odds are that the winner going to be a way-ins.
It's 50- it's 50- it's 50- it's the the the the the th- a wins, it's 58 of y'all last I checked. It's like 73 wins.
You know what?
Now that you put it like that, I like this lottery idea.
But aren't you gonna be mad if someone else gets all that money?
No, I ain't tripping if another black person win the money.
Whoever win the black lottery, I'm just gonna borrow the him because he's my cousin. But you don't know who it is.
It don't matter once they win the money they're gonna be my cousin.
Speaking of which is it too late to become a Wayans?
I can do the paperwork.
All right Roy Wayans.
So don't go away.
Give it up.
Give it up for the top of that!
So don't go away. Welcome back to the Daily Show.
My guest tonight is one of the stars of the Scream Movie franchise.
He's reprising this role as Chad in Scream Six.
Please welcome Mason Goodie. Oh, you're going to go ahead of show time.
Oh my goodness.
Oh my goodness.
I am jealous.
You are buffed.
Oh, stop, it's the steroids.
Oh, too.
Oh, the to'er.
Oh, too.
Oh, the to'n't.
Oh, stop it's the steroids.
Each and everything.
Well, hook me up with your deal load.
Yeah.
When did you steal Deadpool's body?
You got the-
That's hilarious.
Like, you're about to fight the rock.
That's good.
No, no. I, um, it's hook you up with something that will keep you
able to defend yourself so I took up boxing. I thought they replaced your
Oreos with steroids with steroids. So they were listening. Listen they might have it
was a fast transition. Put some steroids in his lucky charms. Congrats man. I hear great things about the movie. I hear you're headed for a record. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the th. th. the th. the th. the th. th. the the th. th. th. th. th. the the th. the th. the the the the the the to to to to to to to to to th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. to. the. to. to. the. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. the the the. th great things about the movie. I hear you're headed for a record opening.
Hey, hey. And the whole franchise, go on, brother, getting money.
Get money.
So, can you, can you tell me anything about the movie? You know, anything that happens,
any spoilers, anything that I could possibly put in scary movie six?
Right, right, yeah. Right, yeah.
Well, if that was the goal, I might need to hook you up for my personal game.
But, um, I can tell you it takes place in the good city of New York.
Ooh.
Ooh.
We've moved now to college, so we're a little bit older, a little wiser hopefully,
and we're trying to put what happened to us in the past since the fifth movie.
Right.
Sixth movie is now trying to up the ante, making it more violent, more scary, ideally, and
then I think I'm shirtless at the point in the movie.
See how you just threw that in?
I just thin. make my k-k out for a half scene or two. It's good to see you because I know your father.
That's so crazy.
Like I know in Cuba's so long.
Like, Cuba's Gooding Jr. Amazing Academy Award when they're after.
I always said, you know, he's the only black guy that I know that gets white guy wasted.
When he, when Cuba drinks you just hear,
Waa!
He pulls his titties out, I'm like, what the fuck is going on?
But he's so much fun.
I actually, we was at an Oscar party and I walked up to him.
He's so funny.
I walk out to him, I go, hey, what's up he has a bucket, he, He just puts it on the top of his head. I think I got a pitch of it.
I'm just taking a stride. You know, if I try to keep up with him and his persona. That's dad. That's dad. It's something to live up to you. You know, if I try to keep up with the the the the something to live up to, you know, he's just taking his stride. You know, if I tried to keep up with him and his persona, I'd fail absolutely every time.
So I took the opposite end of the route.
I read books on Friday night.
Beautiful.
Cuddle with my dog.
And I leave that to care of him.
Well, you know, good luck. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
Scream six will be in theater.
March 10.
Okay, we want to take a quick break.
We'll be right back right after this.
Thank you.
Love.
What is really.
All right.
All right.
that's our show for tonight.
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