The Daily Show: Ears Edition - Obamacare Botch Job | TDS Time Machine
Episode Date: October 22, 2023The Daily Show jumps in our time machine and heads back to this day in 2013: the nation is in the middle of a Republican-caused government shutdown and the Democrats have just botched the nationwide r...ollout of Obamacare. Host Jon Stewart recaps the failed launch before diving deep into HealthCare.gov’s glitches and issues with John Oliver. Stewart then celebrates the legalization of same-sex marriage in New Jersey, recapping a wedding ceremony officiated by a very excited Cory Booker. Alan Greenspan then joins Jon to discuss his new book "The Map and the Territory" and the lessons learned in the years since the Great Recession. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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You're listening to Comedy Central.
October 21st, 2013. From Comedy Central's World News headquarters in New York, this is the Daily Show with
John Stewart.
My guest too.
My guest tonight, Alan Green's band.
Alan Green's band are we joining us.
But our top story tonight, let me tell you.
Shutdown Fallout. My guest tonight, Alan Greenspan.
Alan Greenspan are we doing us?
But our top story tonight, let me tell you.
Shutdown fallout, the Republican shutdown tactics and politics was so offensive to even
independence and moderates that this country looks like it is poised to turn bluer than
a Smurfs' balls after dry-humping a bottle of Windex. I can't believe we have a picture for that.
That's...
All the Democrats have to do to gain like an 80% to 20% advantage in this country.
All that stands in their way is a mildly competent implementation of the health care policy they battled so
hard to keep. Let's take a look. The word glitch has been used by the White
House. That sounds promising. Let's hear more. Health Care.gov has been plagued by
glitches. Glitches glitches. Glitches. Blitches. Blitches. Bletches. The bugs, the kinks.
Whatever you want to call this., glitches, glitches, glitches, glitches, snafu. The bugs, the kinks, whatever you want to call this.
A glitches.
Yes, apparently the Healthcare.gov website has 99 problems,
but a glitch is all of them.
Which...
Which...
Let's me introduce our new segment,
Spinning Beachball of Health Care.
So what are we talking about here?
A few page freezes?
Many who want to sign up are having trouble
just getting on to the website.
Logging on.
Okay, so the first step doesn't work. Well, I have a feeling after that, it's smooth sailing.
Wrong information on Medicaid eligibility and long delays in timeouts.
Long delays in timeouts? That's a bad of me. It's also a feature of NFL games.
In America, America loves those.
Confusing error messages, broken calculators.
The fucking calculator doesn't work?
The, the one thing that's been included in computers since 1972?
You couldn't make that work?
What is the only thing that the calculator does is spell out the word boobs, no matter
what you plug into it?
How does the calculator not work?
Give it to a straight.gov.
How bad is it?
According to a poll by the Associated Press, fewer than one in ten people who tried to sign
up in the first week were actually able to complete the process. That's a success rate of less than 10 percent.
Oh my God!
Less than 10 percent.
How bad is that?
20 percent is the number of dentists who recommend sugared gum.
How low is it?
According to a recent poll, more of this country believes Obamacare has been repealed
than have been able to sign up for Obamacare.
The whole point of websites is to design them so that it is nearly impossible to not sign up for something.
Every time I go on Amazon, there's a 40% chance, I'm mistakenly overnight myself six seasons a night court.
It's just the way it's designed. Are you sure you want to leave this page? Yes, I am.
Oops, turns out I ordered something. So how the Democrat's going to spin this third?
I think the number one point about the rollout is that there's huge interest.
19 million individual visits to the website. That's huge.
Yeah, that's huge.
You've angered a lot of people.
The number one worry before we started was,
are people going to be interested?
Will people sign up?
And the answer to that is overwhelmingly yes.
Yeah, but their number one worry was,
will I be able to get health insurance out of this thing?
And the answer to that appears to be 90%.
the 10%ers who were able to log on and enroll, life.
She's a beautiful.
The Wall Street Journal reports the health care marketplace
is generating flawed data for insurance companies. Everything from duplicate enrollments and missing data fields to problems with
eligibility and spouses reported as children.
What kind of computer program forces you to marry your own children?
How bad you?
So, turns out the Obamacare rollout was plagued by a lot more than just glitches.
So much so, the President of the United States, who, as you know, does not usually man this country's IT support center,
summoned us all this morning to the Rose Garden for a little
Glenn Gary Glenn Ross closers spiel.
The Affordable Care Act is not just a website.
The health insurance that's available to people is working just fine.
Instead of paying $1,600 per month, we have a plan that will only cost us $692 a month.
And that's a good deal.
The product is good.
I want people to be able to get this great product.
And that product is working.
It's really good.
It's really good.
When did the president of the United States turn into gill?
When did the president of the United States turn into gill from the Simpsons. She's a beautia, can't be to Calico.
How many can I put you down for her?
A lot, please say a lot. I need this.
He didn't stop, baby.
Ron Popeal kept on selling.
He just heard Janice's story.
She owns her own small business.
All right, but listen, he didn't stop, baby.
Ron Popil kept on selling.
You just just justice's story.
She owns her own small business.
She recently became the first woman to enroll in coverage
through Delaware's exchange.
So that's one.
You know, people say you can't use the website.
Have you told him about Janice?
From Delaware? Hey, but you know what, God bless.
She signed up, she deserves to be up there, to prove that this can be done easily.
It took her seven hours.
On the phone and online, eventually she had to go through and clean out all the cookies from her cache,
and then she was able to sign up, but she did sign up from the small state of Delaware. She had the move. She had the move.
And she is no longer married, but it is done.
She did.
She is done.
She had to move.
She had to do a giant tattoo of a spider on a neck.
But it's done.
Yes, it turns out even the photo op to address the poorly planned rollout of Obamacare
suffered from a clear lack of planning, as evidenced by the decision, perhaps unwise in hindsight,
to place the pregnant woman with diabetes in the sun next to the president.
Good save.
Good save. Give the woman some water.
But fear not, help is on the way.
We've had some of the best IT talent in the entire country join the team.
And we're well into a tech surge to fix the problem.
A surge. Your website is so soffi. We have to use the same strategy we use to salvage the problem. A surge? Your website is so
f-shunders. We have to use the same strategy we use to salvage the Iraq war?
Well our own John Oliver has been trying to sign up for Obamacare. He joins us right now, John.
John. John. John, is that you? Oh, thank God don't leave, don't leave, John, please!
Where are you?
Where?
Okay, okay, here's what happened.
I went to healthcare.gov just like you asked.
Thanks.
I gave them all my information.
I pressed enter, there was a giant sucking sound.
Next thing I knew I was inside their website, John.
I'm suck in here. It's awful. It's horrible in here.
Wow, so there are still a few glitches? Glitches? Glitches? Look at me, John. I didn't get a
404 file unfound screen. I got sucked into the mainframe. Glitches. Is that code behind you? Is that code? Yeah.
Isn't that supposed to be zeros and ones? Yeah. Oh, it's fours and fives here, John. Weird? I don't know which subcontractor
f-foo's that up. This is elemental coding. Well, let me ask you, do you at least have health
insurance now? No, I don't, John? Apparently, I'm still being processed. But, like the president says, the product is good, John.
It's just that there is a small risk that applicants might get sucked into a tron-like
cyber-bureaucratic nightmare with no escape.
Have you just...
Listen, have you tried just hitting escape?
Thank you, Sanjay.
That was the first thing.
All right. My best hope is that they're going to begin in some to fix in to fix in to fix in to fix in to fix in to fix in to fix in to fix in to fix in to fix in to fix in to fix in to fix in to fix in to fix in to fix in to fix in to fix in to fix in to fix in to fix in to fix in to fix in the the the the the the their their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. the thi. to, thi. to, thi. thi. thi. the. theateateatea. thea. th. thea. thea. thea. thea. the. thea. thea. thea. thea. the. Okay that was the first thing. All right. No, John, my best hope is that
they're going to begin to fix in some way. Right. Oh, no, no, John, I've got to get out
of here. What is that? Is that what I think it is? How old is this software, John? Come on, look at the help desk! Wow! Call the help desk! Wow! the help thi- that's that's th- th- th- th- th- thi! thi! thi! thi! thi! thi! thi! thi! thi! thi! thi! thi! thi! thi! th- Oh, John, John, John, John, th-oh, John, John, John, thi-oh, thi-oh, thi-oh, thi- Oh, th- Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh! Oh, thi. thi. Oh, thi. Oh, thi. Oh, thi. Oh, thi. Oh, thi. Oh, thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. th-------s, th----s, th-----s, th-oh, th-oh, thi. thi. Oh, the website is very busy, so I can't get you help right now.
Please, quickly, he's coming back, John.
He's coming back.
No, no, no!
No, no!
You hate to see that.
No, we're over everybody.
Oh, we'll be right back.
Hey, everybody. John Stewart here.
I am here to tell you about my new podcast, The Weekly Show coming out every thi, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. tho. tho. thi. thi. thi. tho, thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. That. That, th. That, th. That, th. That, th. That, th. That, th. That, th. That, th. That, th. th. th. th. th. th. that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, thi. the. thi. thi. th. th. th. th. I am here to tell you about my new podcast, The Weekly Show coming out every Thursday.
We're gonna be talking about the election, earnings calls.
What are they talking about on these earnings calls?
We're gonna be talking about ingredient to bread ratio on sandwiches.
I know you have a lot of options as far as podcasts go,
but how many of them come out on Thursday? Listen to the weekly showe you you you you you you you you you to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the weekly to to to the weekly show to to to to to to to to to Listen to the weekly show with John Stewart, wherever you get your podcast.
Welcome back.
I don't know if you saw this. Over the weekend, very exciting development in my home state.
Ladies and gentlemen, it is officially past midnight. Marriage is equal in New Jersey. Let's get ready to couple. At long last.
People from New Jersey can legally marry each other. I think that's what it means. It is wedding day for hundreds of same-sex couples in New Jersey can legally marry each other.
I think that's what it means.
It is wedding day for hundreds of same-sex couples in New Jersey.
Gay marriage now legal in that state.
Okay, that makes a lot more sense.
I thought it was just that people from New Jersey are allowed to marry other people from New Jersey.
You know, I now pronounce you bada bing and bada boom.
You may now b you bada bing and bada boom. You may now bada bing and bada boom.
Apparently what happened.
It was last month, the lower court judge ruled that New Jersey had to allow gay marriages.
And then last week the state Supreme Court ruled seven to zero that they had to start
today.
Why today?
Well, for one thing, Greg and Michael aren't getting any younger. It was an night and few more excited than Newark Mayor and Senator Elector
who officiated one of the first weddings.
All right, so I have to do this by law.
to do this by law.
Is this one of those stop and frisk deals?
Is that what's happening?
Is it a union thing? What does he have totake a nap? What does he have to do by law?
Why is he even talking about the law?
What? Maybe I should just let him.
All right.
So I have to do this by law.
And so before we exchange the vows, I must ask if there's anyone present here today and Orville should not be married, speak now or forever, hold your peace.
Isn't that crazy? In New Jersey, that is the law. You're required by law to ask if anyone objects to a wedding.
And not just weddings. In New Jersey, you have to do that for everything.
It's part of the state's, you've got a problem with that act.
1794. It's why, anytime you go to a bar in New Jersey, at some point in night, somebody's going to look at you and go, you've got a problem with that.
They don't want to fight you, they're just obeying our laws.
But all right, the formalities are out of the way, time for the special moment that this
couple's been waiting for all their lives.
Do you wish to join you. Not in marriage, but join you together.
I declare to be law.
Too late, it already got weird, so.
I declare Joseph and Orville to be lawful spouses in the state of New Jersey.
You may kiss your spouse.
All right.
Getting weirder.
All right. You may hug your bear. What hell?
Leave them alone!
This is not about you!
And you think that's bad, you should have seen what happened during their first dance.
What? Let them go!
We'll be right back. Welcome back to my guest tonight.
Former chairman of the Federal Reserve Board.
His new book is called The Map and the Territory.
Risk Human Nature in the future of forecasting. Please welcome back to the program.
Alan Greenspan, sir.
Thank you.
All the way much to say it.
Thank you.
Thank you. There you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
Enjoy.
Enjoy.
How are you?
How are you?
Please.
Have a seat there, my friend.
Yes, sir.
Listen to this.
So, the book is called the map and the territory.
Can we back to that?
Are you enjoying that?
Were you back there? You get the feed the feed the feed the feed the feed the feed the feed the feed the feed the feed the feed the feed the feed the feed the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th, you. You we back until I stop laughing? Are you enjoying that? Where you back there? You get the feed, you got chocolate back there, it's a good time. Oh, yeah.
I'm very talented. All right. So in 2008, so you're the Fed chairman. In 2008 you testify
that the one thing about this financial collapse that you didn't see coming was that you thought the banks
would have been better stewards of their own capital, that they would have been
better self-regulators, and that this book was your journey into finding out why they
were terrible.
Please.
Have at it.
I couldn't have said it better.
Thank you very much. I appreciate that.
Why were they terrible at regulating their own risk?
Well, I don't think they fully understood the types of risks that were out there.
It's very interesting when you're in the financial
business to try to figure out why markets behave as they do. And it's tough.
I mean, a lot of people think they can do it very easily, but we really can't
forecast all that well. We make, we pretend that we can, but we really can't.
And markets do very weird things because it's being,
it reacts to the way people behave,
and sometimes people are a little screwy.
You just learned this?
People are always screwy.
It's greed, isn't it?
It's greed and hubris. No?
Well, yeah, but it's also a lot of other things. Now, look, I was brought up in the
canyons of Wall Street, and I know what screwiness is. Right. I mean, I've watched it all
my life. What's very different about this is that we, that was those of us who did analysis, always thought that that
screwing this would wash out and that all you had to look at is the real numbers in the
real world.
Right.
That was wrong.
And I'll tell you, it's very hard for me to convey, but the simple premise which we all
made that people would act rationally in their long-term self-interest made a huge impact on how you
viewed how the economy would function. But even if you look at the simple
numbers, these guys are you know taking 30-to-1 risks on stuff that they're
not capitalized on, that's not even, you know, studying human behavior.
That's looking at a basic balance sheet and going,
what is this?
Precisely.
Now, when we began to see what was going on,
you couldn't believe that there would be people who would be that disregarding of their own companies.
How can you run, as you say, 30 times?
Right, on the leverage.
But isn't it because they don't pay the penalty?
Isn't it the rewards that they were getting,
it's the system was incentivized
for these crazy short-term bursts of rewards?
Back in 1970, the New York Stock Exchange said that broker-dealers, which are
who all these people are, could incorporate. Prior to then they were all
partnerships, and let me tell you something about a partnership, your partners
don't let you take any risk that can affect them. And I remember they wouldn't lend you a nickel overnight.
And the system worked.
You did not get anybody failing because the equity was protected.
As soon as they started to go to corporations,
they took risks for exactly the reason you suggested.
But didn't we then deregulate those corporations and allow them to take took risks for exactly the reason you suggested. But didn't we then deregulate those corporations
and allow them to take those risks?
Because a lot of those safeguards in there,
we always are going to have some bust and booms,
but they're not going to be as large
because there were some clear-cut regulations in place
that controlled how much they could lend overnight,
or the amount of money they could could from their savings holders to their more speculative derivative businesses.
The easiest thing to do is to increase capital requirements. If they want to do
things which make no sense, whatever, let them do it and let them suffer the consequences,
but don't put them in a position where they can default.
Right.
Because what the real problem in all of these areas are,
and the fact that when a bank fails,
it tends to create a contagious effect
and it rumbles through the system.
Sure. And that's precisely what happened on September the 15th, 2008.
Right.
Those of us who look at that sort of stuff
recognize that you just can't tell which are going to be the toxic assets.
So I think the only way to solve this problem is to get enough regulatory capital in place,
and then they can do a lot of things which you shouldn't be able to
shouldn't worry about. So what would you say? 12 to 1? What are we dealing with
here? 10 to 1? I would say basically that well right now there are 11% of assets.
Right. I think the number ought to be twice that. So 22% of that kind of thing. Are they
going to number ought to be twice that. So 22% of that kind of thing.
Are they going to do it?
No.
Well, thank you very much for your,
the map and the territory on the bookshelves now.
Alan Greenspan, go get the bugs.
Go get the books.
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