The Daily Show: Ears Edition - Pizza Passion: Jon Stewart's Infamous Pizza Takedowns
Episode Date: September 12, 2023New York is famous for its pizza and no one is prouder of that than Jon Stewart…or more protective. Jon takes on Donald Trump, the entire city of Chicago, and Mayor Bill DeBlasio in his defense of p...roper pizza etiquette and his mission to cement New York as the pizza capital of America. Grab a slice and strap in for the ride.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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Hey, everybody, John Stewart here. I am here to tell you about my new podcast. The Weekly Show. It's going to be coming out every Thursday.
So exciting.
You'll be saying to yourself, TGID.
Thank God it's Thursday.
We're going to be talking about all the things that hopefully obsess you in the
same way that they obsess me.
The election.
Economics.
Earnings calls.
What are they talking about on these earnings calls?
We're going to be talking about ingredient to bread ratio on sandwiches. And I know that I listed
that fourth, but in importance it's probably second. I know you have a lot of options as far as
podcasts go, but how many of them come out on Thursday? I know you have a lot of options as far as podcasts go, but how many of them
come out on Thursday? I mean, talk about innovative. Listen to the weekly show with John Stewart,
wherever you get your podcast. Central. Sarah Palin's cross-country now on publicity barnstorming tour of Real America continued
yesterday.
On day three of Sarah Palin's One Nation bus tour, she met with Donald Trump on his home turf
right here in New York City.
Oh my god, she's here? She's in the house?
With him? Wow, this brings up so many questions. Whose name will they put
on the vehicle they travel in? Hmm. Will they call it trail in the toward? What will they
call it? So Trump's showing pale on the town. I'm sure he took it to the best to the best, some classy place like the Trump, all you can eat foie gras and caviar atyria? Trump, f'a, thia, thia, thiiii, where, where, where, where, where, where, with the the their, with, with, with, like the Trump all you can eat foie gras and caviar at the area
Trump foie gras and cafeteria where you are guaranteed to contract gout
the disease of kings
the two broke bread they went out for a slice of pizza in New York's Times
Square you know what huh slice of pizza
respect the place is called famous familia pizza it is an Times Square. Oh, you know what? Huh. Slice of pizza.
Respect.
The place is called Familia Pizza.
It is an Albanian chain of pizzerias.
What?
Famous Familias of 50 than Broadway.
I mean, I'm eating there.
Pizz.
What?
Famous Familios of 50 than Broadway. I mean, I'm eating there. Pizza's, you know, fine.
I used to eat there a lot when I was working next door at Caroline's Comedy Club. It's good, convenience pizza.
It's, you know, back in the 80s, there weren't a lot of food options in Times Square.
It was either Familia Pizza or Scarfing down some edible underwear from one of the porn shops.
And then Giuliani took that option away.
You know, Donald, I don't want to say anything,
but if you're taking an esteemed visitor
to get real New York pizza, familias ain't it.
Dinner was great. We had great pizza. No, no. It's not. Unless a real real thia's the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their is their is their is their is their is their is their is thi. Familia. Familia. thioui. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. th. th. th. And th. And th. And th. And th. And th. And th. And th. And th. And th. And th. And th. And th. And th. And thi. And thi. And thi. And thi. And thi. And thi. And thi. And thin. And thin. And the thin. And. And. And. And. And. And. And the the the the the the their the their t. And. And. And. And. And. And thininin. And. And. And. And. And had great pizza. It wasn't that good. It was real New York pizza. No! No, it's not.
Unless a real authentic New York pizza can also be found in Terminal 4 of the Phoenix Sky Harbor International Airport.
It's familiar, it's a change. And Governor Pallon, by the way, no disrespect to you.
You're a guest in our city, we should offer you the finest that our hospitality has to offer you. I just would have thought Captain Comover could have pulled that one off. I mean for
fuck sake it's New York City. I mean I hate to I hate to use this term this
close to ground zero but we're a bit of a pizza mecca. I mean you know you got you
you got Lombardy's.
Honestly, Lombardy.
Go down to Lombardies, oldest pizzerian town, little, little, little, littally, found
it in 1905.
They make their own pork sausage.
Mow, you go to Grimaldes, under the Brooklyn Bridge.
A brick oven, to brick oven.
to the too-o'clock, thin crust with sweet sauce. Arturo's on Houston Street, cold oven, lightly charged crust.
Go to Johns.
Oh, Johns. Go to the one on Bleeker, if that's full.
Go to the Johns on the Upper West Side.
It's not the same vibe, but the pies.
De Nino's on Staten Island. They got the breadcrumbs on the f-what are you doing?
Familia and Vivian in Broadway?
Now, I get it, I get it.
You're in a hurry.
Maybe there's security concerns.
I'll forgive you the selection.
I apologize.
Let's just go to the content of your meeting, and then we'll just...
Son of a bitch!
Mother... and you stack your slices, Donald?
With all due respect, you stack slices of pizza the steam
from the bottom of the slice is going to make the top crust, you piece of shit,
maybe all those years, all those years,
all those years,
making your hair do whatever it is that it does, you think
you can go around layering any fucking thing you want to layer. And no one's going to say
anything about it. But you cannot, you know something? I apologize. I apologize. No disrespect.
I apologize. Let's continue with the meeting. Is it. Are you eating it with a fork? A fucking fork!
Ah! Maraul!
Ugh! No!
No!
The Porquetta satanica!
Ah!
Etulled de del Biobdiablo!
Donald Trump, why don't you just take that de the biob Diablo!
Donald Trump, why don't you just take that fork and stick it right in New York's eye? Donald Trump, we work hard.
And you do this? You disrespect us in our own house?
Skata Gouch. You can put your name on everything, you can build your
glass and gold-painted buildings to the sky blocking out the Central Park Sun.
It's fine, it's fine.
But you invite an important visitor to our house, to our town, and eat your pizza with
a fork right in front of us.
Who the fuck do you think you're...
You know what?
Hey, why don't you take a
Fiorella LaGuardia's hat and feed it to Joe DiMaggio's crying ghost on
Liberty Island, you son of a bitch? You son of a bitch! Watch and learn for God's
sakes. Watch and learn for God's sakes.
Watch and fucking learn. You fold it over the end.
You fold it.
You fold it.
You fold it and you eat it.
You fold it and you eat it.
You fold it.
You fold it.
You fold it.
You fold a little par eat it. One hand.
You have the other hand free.
You put a little parmesan, a little ragno, a little red pepper.
Maybe you can point in your friend and go, it's a try and you're nice.
Maybe you're a guy you know what you're going to go, hey, you're tak.
All right, they're very nice.
Or maybe you just use your other hand to take an irresponsible amount of abdance. Dab it on there. And maybe a few minutes later, you just throw him the fuck out.
You just throw them out.
Or you leave them on the table and go, you want a tip here?
You fucking tip?
What do I look like a fucking busboy?
No, this is fact.
Actually, I was a busboy.
My point is you a story. I'm going to tell you a story.
I'm going to tell you a story, Donald Trump.
My grandparents immigrated to this country.
My grandfather worked as a taxi driver in Brooklyn.
My other grandfather worked as a dry cleaner in Washington Heights.
I do not come from successful stock.
But every day they
worked their fingers at a bone, to the bone, because it was their dream that
someday their grandson could afford some DVDs of all of Robert De Niro's movies.
So that he could, little Jewish boy of Latvian, Lithuanian, and Mongolian blood, could one day, one
day, God willing, uh, pretend to be Italian on television.
And now, you're the f-biastaped pizza with a fork.
You know what?
Based on how you eat pizza Donald, I want to see your long-form birth certificate.
I don't think you were really born in New York.
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John Stewart here.
Unbelievably exciting news.
My new podcast, the weekly show.
We're going to be talking about the election, economics, ingredient to bread
ratio on sandwiches.
Listen to the weekly show with John Stewart, wherever you get your podcast.
The only thing anyone in New York, New Jersey, the entire tri-state region is really talking about, is the ongoing fallout, the scandal involving
governor Chris Christie of New Jersey, the closing of the George Washington Bridge.
The new mayor of the big appleout, the scandal involving Governor Chris Christie of New Jersey, the closing of the George Washington Bridge.
The new mayor of the Big Apple is dealing with a scandal of his own.
Wait, what? The mayor of Bill Deblasio scandal? What the guy's barely been mayor in New
York for two weeks? He handled a major job. What sort of scandal could he possibly be involved in? Mayor Bill DiBlazio may not necessarily eat pizza like
most New Yorkers.
You have my attention? I mean, you know, he's a guy's like 610. He's a large man. Does he eat pizzas as though they're wits crackers? I mean, I don't, what? What? What? What? What? What? the guys, like, the thi. thinks? the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the they, they? they. they. they. they. they. the the the the the they? they? Maybe? Maybe? Maybe? Maybe? Maybe? Maybe? Maybe, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the. I the the the the. I the. I the. I the. I. I. I. I. I. I. I the. I. I. I the the the the the the th. I th. I th. I th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the the th. the th. the the the the the the the I mean, he's a guy's like 610.
He's a large man.
Does he eat pizzas as though they're wits crackers?
I mean, I don't...
And even still, so what?
So unless he rolls up a pie into a ball
and takes it as a suppository at Grimaldi's,
I don't, I don't see the problem.
So the mayor stopped by first sliced at Nile in this afternoon, he cut his pizza with a knife and a fork.
Mother-f-haw!
Oh!
Breathe, Johnny, breathe, Johnny. I know what this is.
This is nonsense.
This is a distraction.
The part of the liberal media from the real issue,
which is Governor Christie's failure to take responsibility for his administration's
Diplazio, you son of a bitch. Supposed to be a champion in the middle class, two weeks into your term, and we catch you
eating pizza a la Trump.
Look, I understand there's a learning curve to be in a mayor, but here's lesser number
one.
And you call yourself a radical socialist spent on destroying me yourself.
Look I understand there's a learning curve to be a mayor, but here's a lesser
number one. Learn how to being a mayor, but here's lesser number one.
Learn how to eat your city's signature dish.
If you were mayor of Philadelphia, would you eat a cheese steak with a knife and fork?
If you were the mayor of Boston, would you eat clam chowder?
If you were the mayor of Boston, would you eat clam chowder with...
Right.
Even there, the method is hands. In my ancestral homeland, it is more the to to to to to to to to to toeeexxxxxxexexeckexeckyciiiiiiiia their their their their their there, the Methodist's hands.
In my ancestral homeland, it is more typical to eat with a fork a knife.
I get it, I get it, you're Italian. I get it, you're Italian.
Not a Jew impersonating Italian. That's nice.
You're just respecting your native lands customs.
One thing though, were you elected the mayor of Italy?
No!
Look out the window in the pizzeria.
You are currently shaming.
Look out the window.
You see a Sistine Chapel or a leaning tower of pizza out the window.
You don't. You see several junkyards and a tanninic salon.
You know why?
Because you're a shegen's that an islanded tha thanananan island tha thin' island thin't shaped like a boot, it just smells like one.
And when you're in Staten Island, you eat your pizza like a disgusting savage,
just like every the person in this fucking city.
Do you understand what I'm saying to you?
Dabagua, munch your mouth.
Everyone knows you're not a real New Yorker until your shirt has at least seven C-through orange grease dates on it.
You know what I'm talking about?
DiBlazio?
You have a piece like this, Lord.
I had a lot on it.
Oh, you had a lot of...
What, you have topings?
Oh, did you have topings?
Oh, do you have topings? What, do you have topings?
You of all pizza?
You,
You,
You, of all people, are worried about holding your pizza?
You, with your enormous con, you, that big wood thing they used to slide the pizza into the oven?
You, you, with your enormous con, thin. You know that big wood thing they used
to slide the pizza into the oven? That thing was built after one of your hands.
I'm pretty sure at a pizza parlor that thing is called the Blasio. I often start with a knife
and fork but then I cross over to the American approach and pick it up when I go farther into the pizza.
Oh, you start over there, you pick it over there, you start it over there, you start
over there, you start over there, you start over there, you start with the Italian
approach, you start out with the Mongolian cheese slurp. No! You pick it up and you eat it with your fucking hand!
Admittedly, your predecessor Bloomberg did not eat it with his hands.
He would usually have an assistant cut it up and chew it and then feed it to him like
a baby bird.
But you're not that!
You're a man of the people! Eat like one! We'll be right back. What about my guest tonight?
He is New York City's 109th Mayor.
Please welcome to the upper east side.
I know. You'll get it up there. You know, this is, since you've been mayor, it has snowed what?
Three times? Three times, yeah.
I remember Bloomberg, 12 years, never snowed once. What?
I think he paid the right guy. That's what I'm talking about. He had the money. Has it been overwhelming? It's nonstop.
It's 24-7. It's the ultimate 24-7 job. Right. But I love this place. I really love this place.
And it's endlessly fascinating to me, but I'd like to snow to end. Yes. I've done the snow
experience. I'd like to try something else now. Here's the thing. So you've got, there's a lot of issues that I want to get today.
We've got, you know, stop and frisk, you're going to be stopping that.
We've got a pre-K education tax policy.
We've got the Stables situation.
But there's one thing in particular that is, let's take a look. Bill DiBlazi was caught on camera this week eating pizza with a knife and fork.
Now Bloomberg, as you know, used to have his food chewed and then put back into his mouth like a baby bird.
But this is unacceptable, sir. you know, used to have his food chewed and then put back into his mouth like a baby bird.
But this is unacceptable, sir.
So may I, this is from, it's called John's Pizzeria.
It's a meal.
It's a, it's called a, it's a sausage and mushroom from John's.
John's is one of the greatest pizza places in the history of pizza.
I thought maybe you and I could break bread, we could share a slice. Would you like a slice?
I would love a slice.
Would you, with your head? What are you doing?
Okay.
Okay. Thank you, John.
I gotta teach you everything.
I want to say, John. as mayor of Knopoli, I mean
New York City, we are always ready for our pizza. Oh my God. Don't even, come on, come on.
Wait to me. There's another way? Oh, let me show you show you. Let me watch
show it. Oh, that's a beautiful slice of pizza.
Hey, Bloomberg's Don, right?
Wait, can you, that technique.
Hold on.
You have a soda, have it soda.
You have a soda.
Have a soda.
No.
No.
No.
You should have a big oath.
I put a big oak down there for you.
Once you get it out.
There's a big up down here?
Yeah.
Oh, here we go.
Wow.
Oh, you are gigantic.
Wow!
Look that.
In his hands, it looks like a regular soda.
Cheers.
We'll be back with more of a mayor to Barclay right after this.
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John Stewart here.
Unbelievably exciting news.
My new podcast, The Weekly Show.
We're going to be talking about the election, economics, ingredient to bread ratio on sandwiches.
Listen to the weekly show with John Stewart, wherever you get your podcast. I have very good news.
As of today, New York's new mayor isn't the only thing about New York City that is freakishly
tall.
It's official now, the new World Trade Center building in New York City is now the tallest
skyscraper in the country.
It may take his dozen years.
But when we do it, we do it big. It's celebration of course with its roots in the sadness.
But still, the's a dozen years.
But when we do it, we do it big. It's celebration, of course, with its roots and
the sadness. But still, the tallest building in America. And we weren't always sure that
that would happen.
An international panel of architects ruled that the needle at top one world trade
center is a spire, not just an antenna, and is thus a permanent part of the building. It's the spire on top that makes it the tallest building in the United States.
Oh yeah.
Spire on top, brood man.
Of course, obviously the only concern with having a spire like that on top of a New York
skyscraper is keeping Stripper King Kong off of it. Putting himself through giant ape college.
So now I suppose that because we're now number one, unfortunately somebody else has to be
number two.
It just...
It tops Chicago's Willis Tower, formerly the Sears Tower, which held the title for four
decades.
I think this is less about the competition of the cities this time because of the significance of this building. You know Poppy, I couldn't agree. the the the the the the the the the the the the th. the the the the, I thi thi thi thi, I thi, I tho, I tho, I tho, I tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, thoes, tho, thoes, thoes, thoes, thoes, thoes, thoes, thoes, thoes, thoes, thoes, thoes, thoes, thoes, thoes, thoes, thoes, thoes, thoes, thoes, thoes, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, thoom.. I thoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooe, to, the competition of the cities this time because of the significance
of this building.
You know, Poppy, I couldn't agree more.
Rebuilding the World Trade Center brings all Americans together.
What kind of an ass-s-bentom would see this as a competition?
I would just say this to all the experts they gathered in one room.
If it looks like an antenna, acts like an antenna,
then guess what? It is an antenna. Today on this wonderful sunny day in Chicago, you are
standing in the tallest occupied spot in a building that you can stand in North America, and
that will continue to be the case regardless of Willis tower?
What you, aren't you?
Fine, fine.
We'll take tallest building in the United States and you can have tallest occupied spot in
a building you can stand in North America.
You know what, Chicago? What are you so mad about?
We already gave you guys murder capital of the United States.
You really think, you really think we can't kill more people than you?
Please, we let's let you win.
Come on, let's not, let's not do this.
Let's just agree.
They're both great buildings.
Both great cities. I love Chicago. You know what?
Let's have a toast.
A little toast to New York and Chicago will happen.
Oh, geez.
With a little Gertrude Bertrand Kremant Limux.
That's the, that's the, did we really, is this real?
Oh.
I figured this would be like ginger ale and shit, but it's not. A toast to peace between New York and Chicago.
While New York City won today, it's no contest which city takes the cake
when it comes to, well, just about everything else.
Deep dish pizza is quite good. Okay, I was going to be nice.
I was going to be nice.
But now you've gone too far.
So let me explain something. But now you've gone too far.
So let me explain something.
Deep dish pizza is not only not better than New York pizza.
It's not pizza.
It's a fucking casserole.
It's a casserole.
It's a f-casserole. I'm surprised you haven't thought to complete your deep dish pizza by putting some canned onion rings on top of it.
It's a cornbread biscuit biscuit which you've melted cheese on and then in defiance of God and man and all things holy, you poured uncooked marimara sauce atop the cheese.
A top! The cheese on top! The cheese on top the sauce, naked, cold, on display like some sort of sauce hooer.
You know the expression, there's no such thing as bad sex or bad pizza.
Your pizza is like sex with a corpse made of sandpaper.
Let me tell you something.
This is not pizza. This is tomato
soup in a bread bowl. This is an above ground marinares swimming pool for rats. Let me tell
you something about your fucking not pizza. I want to know when I get drunk and pass out
on my pizza that I'm not going to drown. Let me tell you something.
I look at this. I look at going to drown. Let me tell you something.
I look at this, I look at this mud on, you son of a bitch.
I look at this, yeah.
Gaba-goo.
I look at this.
When I look at your deep dish, I don't know whether to eat it or throw a coin in it and make a wish.
And if I made a wish, it would be it I wish
for some real f-fixie pizza.
Now, now, in all due respect, I realize,
it's very cold in Chicago, very cold, it's windy.
You need to be able to, I don't know, have a pizza and maybe cut it open and climb inside it like a tong toan to keep warm.
Seriously, who are you kidding?
Who uses an iron skillet to make a pizza?
You don't use an iron skillet to fend off someone who tries to serve you, a fucking
pizza made in a skil?
Here's how I know I'm right. You call it a ti-ton ton ton ton ton ton ton ton ton ton ton ton ton ton ton ton ton ton ton ton ton ton tunnenenedi-tunnedue-tuntun tun tun tun tun tunn tun tun tun tun tun tun tun tun tun tun tun tun. tun. tun. tun. tun. tun, tun, tun, tun, tun, tun, tun, tun, tun, tun, tun, tun, tun, tun, tun, tun, tun, tun, tun, todu, toda, to today, to bea, to beau, toeee, toe, toe, tfiiiiiiiiw.au, tfiiiw.auuuiiiiiiiiiiiii? tfi, pizza made in the sky. Here's how I know I'm right.
You call it Chicago style pizza.
You call it deep dish pizza, stuffed pizza.
You know what we call it?
Huh?
You know what we call this?
You know what I'm saying?
You know what I'm saying?
You know what I'm saying?
Oh, that's nice.
And by the way you don't put tomatoes and celery salt on hot dogs either,
you know what I'm saying? Everybody knows there's three acceptable condiments for a hot dog.
There's mustard, onions, and stagnant cart water. That's it.
We'll be right back.
Uh, a little while back on the program, I personally don't watch it, I think it's grass.
Um, I may have mentioned something about Chicago style pizza
and how it tended to be less pizza-ish than pizza.
I was gesticulating quite a bit during that clip.
In articulating that sentiment, I may have implied that deep dish pizza tastes like
a string cheese that had been baked for two hours inside of Mike Ditka's ass.
So I said that on my program, and apparently, Chicago has television.
Chicago's wins are no doubt taking personal offense
to the Daily Show host, John Stewart's rant
against our Deep Dish pizza.
John Stewart trashing our Chicago-style pizza.
I take big offense because our Chicago deep dish is the best.
Picking on our pizza.
A little bit of a ribbing. Come on, take one bite and it is irresistible. I. I. I. I. I. I. th. th. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. Chicago. Chicago. Chicago. Chicago. Chicago. Chicago. Chicago. Chicago. Chicago. Chicago. Chicago. Chicago. Chicago. Chicago. Chicago. t, t, t, t, t, t, t, t, t, t, t, t, t, t, t, th. I th. I th. I thi. I thi. I thi. I's thi. I's thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. ti. thi. thi. thi. too. tooe. tooe. tooe. tooe. tooe. tooe. Chicago. Chicago. ti. Picking on our pizza. A little bit of a ribbing.
Come on, take one bite, and it is irresistible.
I'm not a deep dish fan myself.
I love thin crust, I'm sorry.
I get a big slice of deep dish.
I used to ship it frozen to California so I can have it.
I'm just not a deep dish. Get to the traffic traffic traffic traffic traffic traffic traffic traffic traffic traffic traffic traffic traffic traffic traffic traffic traffic traffic traffic traffic traffic traffic traffic traffic traffic traffic traffic traffic traffic traffic traffic traffic traffic traffic to to to to to the to to the to to the to the to to to the to to to the traffic in weather already! I'm late and I need to know if I need to wear a coat.
Anyway, some, some people thought that my contribution to the pizza dialogue was not particularly well-reasoned.
to the too'-deauble.
John Stewart went on a rant.
Stuart fired off a tie-rade. It. John Stewart went on a rant.
Stewart fired off a tirade.
It continued like that for a while on that cheesy New York accent.
Cheezy New York accent.
Who the fuck do you think you are talking about a cheesy New York accent?
You sort of, you forget a...
Wait a minute. You know what, I actually, I hear it, you forget a, wait a minute.
You know what, I actually, I hear it now.
You're right.
Now that you mention it, it is somewhat pronounced.
If I was ranting.
Well, I don't know what to say.
It was nothing compared to what people on Twitter were ranting back.
Like, uh, fuck you John Stewart for, for saying, Deep Dish Pizza is in Pizza,
Die.
That particular Twitter user
did not specify the method,
by which I should die,
but I can only assume it would be poisoning by deep dish pizza.
And of course, whenever there's a spirited back and forth,
you just know Chicago Mayor Rahm Emanuel is going to get involved.
This is the gift that Mayor Rahm Emanuel sent to John Stewart on the Daily Show.
The Daily Show posted this vine video showing even a dog rejecting the deep dish pizza from the mayor.
That's our dog, Quali.
That right there is one of the Daily Show dogs,
Quali. And for the record, he didn't want the pizza.
But I have seen that dog eat not only garbage,
but happily spend his entire day with his
nose in another dog's but-hole. The other dog by the way is is Parker and in
Quali's defense Parker has an amazing buttoll the whole.
Elegant, sophisticated with just a susant of snossage. I hope Chicagoans are not too upset.
And in the spirit of healing, I'm going to bring out a guy who actually came by our show the other day
to give us some Chicago pizza.
Please welcome Mark Malnadi of Lou Malnadi's Pizzeria in Chicago.
Come on out, Mark.
This is very much.
Come and sit. Please, have a seat.
Please, have a seat.
You want to put those down?
There we go.
That's very nice.
Now, this is Mark Melnotti.
You run Lu Malnadi's pizza.
I do.
How long have you guys us some plates, yeah?
I did. Is this because the Pope is coming over? Is this because the Pope is coming over? This
is Chicago, John. Let me explain how you eat pizza. Let me just, give me the thing. Come on.
Come on. At least let me set some New York ambiance there. Let me get that's the pizza thing that
ooh. Let me get a little. Hold on. Nice, nice.
Look at this. I tell you, it looks very good. You know, I could really be, you want to
just put that right on there? There you go. Thank you, my friend. Holy
B. I don't know what you, I don't know what, you know, what was the picture? I don't know what the picture was your head the other day. Hold on a second.
Let me just, let me just try and get up on a table.
There we go.
All right, we're good.
All right, so.
Yeah.
Yeah.
What are the fucking animal?
Here, here, here. What am I an animal?
This is for Chicago. I have great friends there. It's a beautiful city.
This is for Chicago. I have great friends there. It's a beautiful city.
Go ahead. Now, I'll tell you what. I dare you to tell me that that isn't the best thing you've ever had in your life.
Now I don't know what that big fat casserole that you had on the other day was.
Let me say this.
Why?
It's very task.
It's very task. You're a reasonable man. It's very task. It's very task. It's very very very very very very very very very very very very. It's very. It's very. It's very. It's very. And I. It's very. And I. It's very. And I. It's very. And I. It's very. And I. It's very. And I. It's very. It's very. It's very. It's very. It's very. It's very. It's very. It's very. And I. And I. It's very. It's very. It's very. It's. It's. It's very. And I. It's very. And I. It's very. And I. And I. And I. It's very. And I. It's very. And I. And I. It's very. And I. And I. It's very. And I. And I. And I. And I. And I. And I. And I. And I. And I, I. And I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I. And I, I, I, I th. And I th. I th. th. It's very very very very very very very th. th. tha. th. tha. tha. tha. tha. It's very very very very very very tha. It's very very thuth. Chicago and New York. Thank you.
I appreciate that.
It's very tasty.
New York pizza is very good.
And at least let's face facts.
We're not California.
I mean, California pizza.
I mean, that is, I mean, that is, honestly, and I say this with all the
respect to California.
That is a pile of shit. No. I'll tell you what it ain't.
It ain't Chicago pizza.
Thank you.
Agreed.
Mark Malnati, everybody.
Thank you, my friend.
Very nice for done.
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Hey, everybody, John Stewart here. I am here to tell you about my new podcast, the weekly
show. It's going to be coming out every Thursday.
So exciting, you'll be saying to yourself, TGID, thank God it's Thursday.
We're going to be talking about all the things that hopefully obsess you in the same way that they obsess me.
The election. Economics. Earnings calls. What are they talking about on these earnings calls? We're going to be
talking about ingredient to bread ratio on sandwiches. And I know that I listed that fourth, but in importance
it's probably second. I know you have a lot of options as far as podcasts go, but how many of them
come out on Thursday?
I mean, talk about innovative.
Listen to the weekly show with John Stewart, wherever you get your podcast.