The Daily Show: Ears Edition - Robert Mueller Gives Trump the World's Easiest Open Book Test | Antoinette Robertson
Episode Date: May 2, 2018Facebook announces a dating feature, Robert Mueller's questions for President Trump are leaked to the New York Times, and Antoinette Robertson discusses "Dear White People." Learn more about your ad-...choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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You're listening to Comedy Central.
John Stewart here.
unnebly exciting news.
My new podcast, The Weekly Show.
We're going to be talking about the election, economics,
ingredient to bread ratio on sandwiches.
Listen to the weekly show with John Stewart, wherever you get your podcast.
May 1st, 2018.
From Comedy Central's World News Headquarters in New York,
this is the Dennis show.
I'm Trevor Noah, thank you so much for tuning in.
My guest tonight, my guest tonight from the hit Netflix show, Dear White People, Antoinette Robinson is joining us everybody. But first, the first, if you're one of those people who believes Facebook has too much access to your personal information, well, good news.
Facebook would like to introduce you to someone with similar concerns.
Mark Zuckerberg announcing that Facebook is getting into dating.
He says that 200 million people list themselves as single and Zuckerberg
wants to foster long-term relationships.
So today, we are announcing a new set of features coming soon around dating.
Now this is going to be, this is going to be for building real long-term relationships,
all right, not just hookups.
Yay.
Finally, relationships without the hookups.
Yeah, Facebook really has his finger on the pulse.
You know how many times I've been in a relationship like,
ah, too much hooking up, too much hookup.
You know what it really turned me on?
Meeting your parents.
Yeah.
But it is sweet that Zuckerberg says this is for building long-term relationships.
Just imagine, you meet someone on Facebook, you get married, you have a kid, and then
because you didn't read the terms of service, Facebook takes that kid and
sells it to Cambridge Analytica. Yeah, it's so beautiful.
And then it's only a matter of time before the Russians meddle in our
love lives. It's going to be like, yes, I'm seeking long-term relationship.
We make life together and vote as family.
And speaking of people, you wouldn't trust with your personal information.
Do you guys remember Harold Bornstein?
He was Trump's personal doctor and Lebowski stunt double.
You remember him? Well, when Trump took office early last year, Dr. Bornstein told New York Times that Trump
was perfectly healthy for his age and that he took a few medications, including propitia,
to try and slow down his balding.
All right, well, it turns out, the President was really pissed that his doctor suffered
from open mouth disease.
Breaking news. A rather bizarre new allegation from President Trump's former private physician.
Dr. Harold Bornstein says shortly after President Trump took office,
the president's personal bodyguard and a top lawyer for the Trump organization
suddenly came into his office, made off with all, all of the president's medical records going back decades.
Who created a lot of chaos.
I couldn't believe anybody was making a big deal about a drug that's to grow his hair,
which seemed to be so important.
And it certainly is not a breach of medical trust to tell somebody they take
propetia to grow their hair. What's the matter with that?
Okay, first off, beautiful hair. Yeah.
I feel like when he was giving Trump propitia, he was like,
one for you, one for me.
One for you, one for me.
And second, I'm completely on President Trump's side on this one.
Your doctor's not supposed to disclose your medical information to anyone,
especially not the New York Times.
Like the way he's saying it, he doesn't even even't to to to to to to to be to be to be to be to be to be to be the to be to be their to anyone, especially not the New York Times. Like the way he's saying it, he doesn't even sound like a doctor.
He sounds like your grandmother telling you embarrassing secrets.
Donny, you're just going bald.
What's the big deal?
Prophecia's better than a wig?
Remember when you tried the wig? That was horrible.
With that said, I also do think Trump went a little overboard. I mean, two days after Dr. Bornstein blabs about the boldness pills,
Trump sends his personal bodyguard and two other dudes
to break down the doctor's door, or probably just walk through the beaded curtain,
whatever, and take all of his records.
And I'm not going to lie, I feel bad for Dr. Borenstein.
He looks shook here. He's like, more than me, I'm scared for everyone else in the fraggle rock community. But let's move on.
Why does no one in Trump's world look normal?
Anyway, let's move on.
Let's move on to the only thing that terrifies President Trump more than going bold.
The Mueller investigation.
We have breaking news from the New York Times, which has obtained the list of 49 questions that special counsel Robert Mueller has recently provided to President Trump's
lawyers. Questions that Mueller wants answered in an interview with the
president. Five about his fired national security advisor, Michael Flynn,
21 about fired FBI director Jim Comey, nine about Attorney General Jeff Sessions,
and 14 about coordination with Russia.
We have a graphic of at least 40 of the questions that Robert Mueller's team would ask the president.
Okay, that's a ton of questions.
Like, you can't make Trump read that much.
No, I mean, the only things that Trump reads are his Twitter mentions in the
Garfield cartoons. The CIA slips into his daily intelligence briefings. That's it. And I get, I I I I I I I I the th, I th, I th, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have th, I have th, I have th, I have th, I have th, I have a th, I have a thi, I have a thi, I have a thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th. We have thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi. thi. theeeei. thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. We have thea,the Garfield cartoons, the CIA slips into his daily intelligence briefings.
That's it.
And I get, I get why Mullah wants to ask Trump these questions.
But I think it'll be a waste of his time.
Because you know that every answer to every one of these questions is just going to be Trump
going, they said I could never get to 270 electoral college.
I got 366 folks, so many votes. Mollo will be like, my question was, please state your name for the record.
Oh, I'm sorry, it's Donald Trump, T.
As in tremendous electoral college victory.
So, Robert Mullah gave a list of questions
to Trump's legal team.
And those questions have now leaked to the media.
And everyone knows, unless it's in a hotel room in Russia, President Trump does not like. the record. the record. the record... the record.. the record. the record. the the. the. the. thii. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. I thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. to to to thi. I'm to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to toe. I I I's toe. I's toe. I's toe. I's toe. I's toe. I's toe. I's toe. I's. I's tr. I's tr. I's tr. I's tr. I'm true. I'm true. true. true. true. true. true. true. true. true. true. true. true. true. true. true. I'm tr media. And everyone knows, unless it's in a hotel room in Russia,
President Trump does not like leaks.
The president tweeting this,
so disgraceful that the questions
concerning the Russian witch hunt
were leaked to the media, no questions on collusion.
Oh, I see.
You have a made-up, phony crime,
collusion that never existed,
and an investigation begun with illegally leaked classified information.
Nice.
Nice.
This is America's first sarcastic president.
Nice.
I mean, don't get me wrong.
Having a sarcastic president is cool until shit hits the fan.
And you'd be like, oh, you're going to kill all these hostages?
Nice. Oh, wait, you did? My bad, my bad.
But you can tell from this tweet that the president is really mad.
First off, because he says none of Mueller's questions are about collusion, which is not true,
because 14 of the questions are about collusion.
But I guess if you round down, 14 is basically zero.
And second, second, he's really mad because he believes that Mueller's team leaked these questions to the press the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the to the press. But what if it turns out the leak
is coming from inside the house?
It's very likely, or at least it would make a lot of sense,
that the leak would come from Trump world.
They're looking for the media and the public to go,
geez, these questions are really hard. They really would not go well for him.
He can't sit down, because they can't convince him themselves. Because the the Because people like us on television would be saying that this is a really bad idea, and
perhaps he listens to television more than he listens to his own advisors.
Being Trump's lawyer must be so exhausting. No, just think about it. He won't listen
to you, so you have to launder your legal advice through the TV.
Trump's lawyers are basically doing the same thing parents do to get their kids to eat greens, you know?
Just like, come on, Timmy, eat your broccoli.
I don't want to! Mr. Sock says broccoli is delicious!
Yay, broccoli! I love Mr. Sock. I love Mr. Suck. I hate daddy. Oh, come on, your daddy's a great guy.
Nuh, I like Mr. Bob Moore. He hugs mommy during the day.
What the fuck?
What the fuck?
So, this is interesting, right?
Trump's lawyers may have leaked these questions so that the news will tell Trump to not talk to Mullah.
And, guess which news did exactly what Trump's team needed.
This garbage from the New York Times tonight?
Absolute garbage. No attorney will ever let this president sit down with Robert Mueller.
This New York Times thing, put it in your fireplace and burn it.
Because we have sources that say, half of these questions are dumb anyway. You know, oh,
what was in your mind at the time? You don't punish people or charge people for the thoughts
they have in their head. You know, my favorite thing about Sean Hannity is, he's
the wrongest right-sounding person you'll ever meet. Because you realize you can get charged
because of the thoughts you had in your head.
It's called criminal intent.
It's such a basic concept of law and order
that they put it in the name of the show.
And you know what I find amazing about all of this.
And you know what I find amazing about all of this. Like just when you think about it,
what I find amazing about all of this is,
everyone is telling Trump he shouldn't sit down with Robert Mueller.
But why?
If he's innocent, just go answer the questions.
And I know, some people might be saying, no, Trevor,
Mueller is clearly trying to try to trap Trump.
That's trying to trap Trump. That's what he's trying to do. It's trying to trap him. What trap?
He's giving Trump the questions ahead of time.
That's not a trap.
Trump can practice his answers.
He can tattoo them on himself like Memento if he needs.
I mean, hell, if it helps, he can memorize his answers in song form. He can be like, th not protect Michael Flynn, and I never met Putin.
Like, you can, you can do it all.
How is this a trap?
I honestly find this mind-blowing because, like, this is the world's easiest open book test.
And still, still, Trump's people are going, yeah, I'm worried he's still going to fail.
We'll be right back.
Hey everybody, John Stewart here.
I am here to tell you about my new podcast, The Weekly Show, it's going to be coming out every Thursday.
So exciting. You'll be saying to yourself, TGID. Thank God it's
Thursday. We're going to be talking about all the things that hopefully obsess you in the
same way that they obsess me. The election. Economics. Earnings calls. What are they talking
about on these earnings calls? We're going to be talking about ingredient
to bread ratio on sandwiches and I know that I listed that fourth but in
importance it's probably second. I know you have a lot of options as far as
podcasts go but how many of them come out on Thursday. I mean talk about innovative.
Listen to the weekly show with John Stewart. And how many of them come out on Thursday? I mean, talk about innovative.
Listen to the weekly show with John Stewart,
wherever you get your podcast.
Welcome back to the Daily Show.
My guest tonight is an actor who stars in the critically acclaimed Netflix series,
Dear White People.
Please welcome, Antonette Robertson. Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you for having me. I am a genuinely huge fan of dear white people and I know some people in the
audience may not be familiar with the show. thateat the ti.
Thank you for having me. I am a genuinely huge fan of dear white people and I know some
people in the audience may not be familiar with the show but the title makes it seem like it's a show that's
telling white people stories or ideas that emanate from the black world but
really it's just a story of kids living their lives in college and many of
them happen to be black. Yeah it's just a series the name is meant to articulate the mindset of the minorities of the world if that makes makes thensensensensensensensensensensensensens th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. tho-a. tho-a. to thi. the thi. to to to to to to to to to to to to their th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the thi. thi. the. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. to. te. te. te. te. te. the. the. the. th mindset of the minorities of the world, if that makes sense.
And the thought process is there are several groups of students, like it follows minorities
on their passive of, like in college. So they figure out like they're navigating racial tensions
because there's a black face party. And after the black face party, racial tensions get to the
upmost high and these students are just trying to figure out their identity and where they fit in in the world and how the world perceives
them.
So it's just telling our stories.
What I love about your character is you play this powerful, smart woman who comes from
a world where for so long she has been mistreated because of the color of her skin,
even within the color of her skin, even within
the black community.
Like, why is Coco so significant just in the name, in of itself?
Because her name is Colandria.
So in her mind, changing it to Cocoa made it more acceptable.
So if she went in for an interview and they said, Colandria automatically, resume
in the bin.
You know what I mean? Her thought process was, you know,
if I can assimilate in some way, shape or form,
that is going to be a means of survival for me in the world
that has a tendency to view black people as one thing,
and we're all multidimensional beings. So that fact alone has her strive to be the best in her classes, to be articulate, to make
sure that she has a level of decorum, especially in the presence of other being a black face
and a white place.
So people think that she sells out and that's not what it is.
She's just trying to better herself and that's the only way that she sees fit.
Would there any parallels between Coco's world and your world in real life as a dark-skinned black woman? Most definitely I feel like as a dark-skinned woman if I'm
assertive and I passionately articulate how I'm feeling people might see me as
being aggressive or I get called the B-word in that regard. Women know
that on a whole like sometimes we might be a little apprehensive to say how we
we feel because of how we might be labeled in a man's world so to speak. So Cococo the th th th th th th th th th th th tho tho th tho th tho thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi. thi. I'm thi. I'm th. I'm th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I thi thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. thi. the. thee. teeea. tea. tea. tea. tea. tea. tea. tea. tea. thae we might be labeled in a man's world, so to speak.
So Coco's just decided, okay, if I polish, if I polish the things that I say, if I make
sure that I make the right moves, if I'm in line with the right people, if I go to the
right school, then I'll have the success that I really, really want in life. When you look at the character and the story story story, thaaa. I tha. I tha. I's tha. I's th. I's th. I's th. I's thiia. I's thi. I's thi. I's thi. I's, thi. I'm, thi. thi. th th th thi. Coe. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. I's. I's. th. th. I's. th. th. th. I's th. th. th. I's the. I's t t t t t t t t toe. I's. t t t t toge. I'ma. I'ma. I'ma. I'm t toda. toda. When you look at the character and the story, we're moving into season two now.
I know many people, including myself, are excited for it.
Yeah.
What is your, I guess, what is your greatest joy in playing Coco?
What is the thing you're looking forward to in her evolution?
I love that Coco is starting to live her absolute truth, unapologetically so. I feel like th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi, I thi, I thi, I thi, I thi, I thi, I tho, I thi, I thi, I thi, I tho, I tho, I tho, I thi, I'm thi, I'm tho, I'm their, I their, I their, I their, I their, I their, I their, I their, I their, I their, I th. their, I th. th. th. th. thi, I thi, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, thi, thi, thi, thr. to, ttttogu. togu. togu. togu. togu. togu. togu. ttogu. together, ttttt I feel like we're in a world that wants to put women in this little box and we should be able to do, say and be whatever we want,
especially like little girls of color who aren't used to having, not used to
seeing the Olivia popes before they become Olivia Pope. They see like if
they're navigating the world and they feel kind of insecure or based on the fact that the world has this notion that a a a a a a a a thi.. thi. their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, thi, their, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, their, their, thi, thi, their, their, thi, thi, their, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, tre, tre, tre, tre, tre, tre, tre, true, true, tru, true, true, true, true, true, true, truth, tru, tru, tru, tru, true, tru, truth, tru, truth, true, true, true, true, true, tr world and they feel kind of insecure or based on the fact that the world
has this notion that a Eurocentric ideal of beauty is what beauty is.
These girls don't see themselves, they don't see a reflection of themselves and because
of that, you know, it gives people a lack of self-esteem.
So I feel like with portraying her with Grace, even though, you know, she does clap
back, don't get a twist a guy
But but you know articulately so
It feels like okay great you guys can see a woman of color that's not depicted as a stereotype or how the world would want to believe that we're all angry Black women right but giving her the opportunity to be angry
Yeah if she wants to be right ladies
Right? Be angry if you want to be happy if you want to be always be always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always. to be to be always. to be to be to be to be to be to be to the the to be to be to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to be to be to be to be to be to be always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the to be to be to be to be to be the the the the opportunity to be angry if she wants to be. If she wants to be, right ladies?
Be angry if you want to be, be happy if you want to be.
Always beautiful, always amazing.
Thank you so much for being on the show.
Thank you for having to be.
Season 2 of Dear White People premieres May 4th on Netflix.
Antonette Robertson, Ears Edition.
Watch the Daily Show weeknights at 11, 10 Central on Comedy Central and the Comedy Central app.
Watch full episodes and videos at the Daily Show.
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This has been a Comedy Central podcast.
Hey everybody, John Stewart here. I am here to tell you about my new podcast, The Weekly Show,
it's going to be coming out every Thursday.
So exciting, you'll be saying to yourself, TGID, thank God it's Thursday.
Thank God it's Thursday we're going to be talking about.
All the things that hopefully obsess you in the same way
that they obsess me, the election, economics, earnings calls.
What are they talking about on these earnings calls?
We're gonna be talking about ingredient to bread ratio on sandwiches.
And I know that I listed that fourth, but in importance, it's probably second.
I know you have a lot of options as far as podcasts go, but how many of them come out on Thursday?
I mean, talk about innovative.
Listen to the weekly show with John Stewart, wherever you get your podcast.