The Daily Show: Ears Edition - Sarah Silverman Covers Nikki Haley’s Entry Into The GOP Primary | Nikki Haley
Episode Date: February 15, 2023Sarah Silverman takes on the day's latest news including Nikki Haley's presidential run announcement, the drop in army recruitment numbers, the Church of England's decision to make God genderless, and... the latest Valentine's Day romance scams. March For Our Lives organizer-turned Congressman Maxwell Frost shares how his views of elected officials have changed now that he works from the inside.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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you're listening to Comedy Central Central. From New York City, the only city in America.
It's the show that invented news.
This is the Daily Show.
I'm Sarah Silverman.
It is the second night of me hosting the show and I am hard as a rock.
It's just, it's very fun to be in charge of a late night show.
I mean, I threw a stapler at an intern today and there was just nothing he could do about it. I mean, it's just been really fun.
It's just been's very fun to be in charge of a late night show. I mean, I threw a stapler at an intern today and there was just nothing he could do about
it.
I mean, it's just been really fun.
We've got a great show for you tonight, so let's get into headlines.
Let's start with today's big news about the 2024 presidential race.
Someone has stepped forward to run against Trump for the Republican nomination, and she's a lady.
Breaking news this morning, former South Carolina governor, Nikki Haley, is now officially
running for president.
She is the first Republican to challenge Trump for that nomination.
She obviously served as his ambassador to the United Nations.
She announced as much just in a video a few moments ago.
You should know this about me.
I don't put up with bullies.
And when you kick back, it wants that joke back.
Oh wait, it just called again, it wants this joke back.
I actually thought this was a great ad and I'm excited to buy whatever pharmaceutical
product that nice lady was selling.
But this is going to be a tough race for Nikki Haley.
Right now she's polling at just 1%, and that's pretty bad.
I mean, you know, even Mike Pence is at 2
percent. Mike Pence's noose rope is at 5 percent which is beef clean material.
But you do get some advantages if you run against your former boss. My opponent's
economic plan is terrible and when he poops in his office, we all hear him go, out, out, out, out, out, out, out.
I love political satire.
It's really my lane.
Whoever wins this election will be commander-in-chief of the U.S. Army, although based
on how recruiting is going lately, that's going to be like 20 people.
The U.S. Army is trying to recover from its worst recruiting year in decades, and officials
say those recruiting woes are the result of traditional hurdles.
Young people don't want to die or get injured.
They don't want to deal with the stress of army life, and they don't want to put
their lives on hold. But the recruiting obstacles don't seem to be rooted in toe inuteduteduteduteduteduted to be roededededededed. to be roed. to be roed. to be to be to be to be rooted. to be rooted in. 't seem to be rooted in concerns about the COVID-19 vaccine or about wokeness as some Republicans claim.
Only Republicans would have the freaking lips to blame the lack of Army
recruitment on wokenness and the number one reason that people really like not
dying. These Gen Z kids are just like, why would I go get shot in the
Middle East when I can get shot in the Middle East when I can
get shot in the comfort of my middle school?
I'm kidding.
That doesn't happen in America.
How is the military woke?
Help me here.
Soldiers are still soldiers. They're not going to be in
battle like, I don't think this is a safe space. Trigger warning, I'm going to
pull my trigger. But this drop in recruitment is coming at a really perilous time for America.
If we don't have a strong military, the balloons win.
I think recruitment is done because there are too many pop star militias.
Young people would rather be in the BTS army or the Rihanna Navy or the Phoebe Bridgers
Mujahideen.
This is so weird. Why is everyone so obsessed with whether or not something is going
woke?
Anyway, let's move on to our next story.
What are God's pronouns?
Should God, should our father stop being referred to as he?
The Church of England is considering whether to break with tradition and use
gender neutral terms for the Almighty instead.
Well joining us now in the studio, Anglican priest Charlie Bell.
Is our father actually a woman?
Huh, what an interesting question?
Is it? Is it really an interesting question?
I think God has bigger things on his mind than pronouns.
I mean, come on, the Super Bowl just happened.
You think those touchdowns score themselves?
And really, like, who cares about this?
There are actually people out there who really need God to be a man?
God is the embodiment of all that is good and merciful and holy,
and he definitely likes girls.
And he only created mountains because he's really into boobs.
It doesn't matter God is fake.
This is like debating whether Bigfoot wears Reeboks. And finally, today is Valentine's Day, the day when flowers find out which house they're
going to die in.
Seriously, why do we give people roses?
They are already dying the second you cut them.
You're basically giving someone a hospice patient. Love them well you can.
Just try to keep them hydrated and make sure they're as comfortable as possible.
But there is a Valentine's surprise that's even worse than roses, stealing people's money.
What is Valentine's Day? Law enforcement reminding you to keep an eye out for
what they call romance scams. Officials say criminals will scour dating websites, dating apps,
chat rooms, build the relationship with you with the goal of accessing your
financial or other personal information. The FTC says romance scams
cost nearly 70,000 consumers 1.3 billion dollars last year. The FBI sees a
large percentage of elderly victims.
Let's talk red flags.
This one might hurt, but if they're too good to be true.
Gorgeous photos, perfect job, amazing lifestyle,
make a scammer's job of luring you easier.
If they seem sweet, genuine, caring, talking about a future together, a little more quickly
than typical relationships they could be drawing you close to take advantage of you. That's right you gotta be careful out there if anyone
literally ever says anything nice to you call the police. And she said another red
flag is if the person has an amazing lifestyle a perfect job gorgeous photos oh my god
am I a scammer?
Well, for more on these romance scams,
we turn to Michael Costa.
Michael, it's...
It is so sad to hear about this, especially on Valentine's Day.
I know, Sarah, but every holiday is an opportunity for scams.
Last president's day, a guy on Facebook claimed he was Abraham Lincoln and asked me for
money, which was clearly a scam because I had already just wired the real Abraham
Lincoln $10,000.
There's only one Lincoln, buddy.
How stupid do you think I am?
You're very smart, Michael. But let's focus on the romantic scams because I'm
especially worried about how they target the elderly. Yeah, the elderly are easy
targets because they're so vulnerable and they're so horny. Honestly, I'm scared for my own loved ones.
That's why I've started catfishing
my grandmother.
You're catfishing your own grandmother?
As a preventative measure, yes.
The best way I can protect my 97-year-old grandmother from being scammed is to scam her
myself.
This way she feels loved and I put all the money she sends me right back into her bank account.
It's the same way I stop dogs from eating discarded chicken bones laying on the street
by eating them myself.
I'm not sure the dogs are grateful, but how does catfishing your grandmother even work?
Take me through this. Okay, well it works the same as normal catfishing.
You create a profile of a charming but believable person. In my case, Miguel, Gustavo, international
art dealer and king of Brazil. First, you like their posts, then you start the DMs. Hey, I like
what I see. Show me what you got under that sweater you knitted for yourself. Here's what I'm packing. Rose, you send your grandma nudes?
Well not my nudes, obviously. I'm not a creep.
I send her picks of guys I find online.
Okay, good.
Few, I thought you exchanged nudes.
No. No, I mean, she sends me her nudes.
Oh, God. Look, I know, I know it's gross. nudes. Oh my God.
Look, I know it's gross.
I don't like it either.
I am glad she's using a yoga class as I got it for Christmas,
but still, I don't want to see it.
Just like I don't want to spend hours texting with her about our grandson never calls
or have her explain every episode of The Yellowstone.
It's just Yellowstone, Grandma?
Look, I don't have a choice, Sarah, okay?
As Michael Costa, I can't keep my grandma offline,
but as Miguel Gustavo,
well, I can make sure her money stays where it belongs,
in the bank account that I'm gonna inherit one day.
I guess in its own way, this is is actually a like a loving thing, Michael.
I hope all the men out there love their grandma's enough to seduce them.
Thank you, Sarah.
I really am the best grants.
Oh, sorry, I got, I got to.
My grandma's deeming me.
Um, me am more, please send $5,000.
I'm having my third kidney removed.
Okay, well, thank you so much Michael.
Yeah.
All right.
Let me come back, I'm going to find out what people like about Jews.
So don't go away. Welcome back to the Daily Show.
You know, there's been a lot of anti-Semitism in the news lately, so I decided to hit the streets of New York in search of some allies.
Welcome back to the Daily Show. You know, there's been a lot of anti-Semitism in the news lately, so I decided to hit the streets of New York in search of some allies. Take
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Dysemitism, I'm hitting the streets looking for a little pro-semitism.
Let's hope it doesn't end in a hate crime.
What do you like about Jews?
They make banging Christmas albums.
What is they not to love about Jews? The food,
the culture, the celebrations. Lotkas. Hello, big group of men. Where are you all from?
Belgium. Here in New York City, the land of Jews. Have you done any Jewy things? What's a Jewy?
Okay, great question. Have you eaten a bagel? Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, of course.
Jew! Have you ever been vaccinated for polio? Yeah, I think so, yeah. Jews! Who are your favorite
comedians? Jerry Seinfeld? Jerry Seinfeld! Jewe! Adina Menzel, Barbara Streisand. Amy
Winehouse, she is a gem. Doja cat is a Jew. Wow, she should be doja cats probably. Yes. Who are your favorite Jews that? J J J J J J J J J J J J, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Have th. Have th. Have th. Have thi, thi. Have thi. Have you? Have you? Have you? Have you? Have you? Have you. Have you. Have you. Have you. Have you. Have you. Have you. Have you? Have you. Have you. Have you. Have you. Have you. Have you. Have you? Have you? Have you? Have you. Have you? Have you. Have you? Have, have you? Have, have you? Have, have you? Have, have you? Have, have you? Have, have? Have, have you? Have? Have, have you? Have, have you? Have, have th. Have, have you? Have, have you? Have, have you? Have, have you. Have, have you. Have, have you. Have the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the. Have you. Have you. Have you. Doja cat is a Jew. I love it. She should be Doja cats probably.
Who are your favorite Jews that you can think of? I can't think of a famous Jew off the
top of my head. You can't think of a single famous Jew. I don't want to say someone's name
if I don't know they're Jewish. That's tough for me to. Who are you thinking that seems Jewish? Are you Jewish? Are you Jewish? the Jewish? th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi thi thi. I to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the the the the the the the th. Who th. Who th. Who th. Who th. Who th. Who th. Who th. Who th. Who th. Who th. Who th. Who th. Who th. Who thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi toeeeeeeeeeeeeat to to to to thi thi thi thi thinking that seems Jewy but you're not sure? Are you Jewish?
Yes.
Okay, there we go.
I'm going to teach you some Yiddish, okay?
Gay, cocking, often yam.
Repeak, coffin, often, yam.
That's right.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
Give me a hug.
Thank you.
You know what that means?
No.
Go go th that that that means that means that means that means that means that means that means that means that means that means that means that means that means that means that means that means that means that means that means that means that means that means that means that means that means that means that means that means that means that means that means that means that means that means that means that means that means that means that means that means that means that means that means that means. that means. that means. that means that means that means that means that means that means that means that means that means that means that means that means that means that means that means that means that means that means that means that means that means that means that means that means that means that means that means? No. Go take a shit in the ocean. Would you be an ally to the Jews in this time of anti-Semitism?
A huge ally.
What would you do to protect me?
I would speak up for you.
Beautiful.
I would light the menorah with you.
Look at this guy, knowing menorah!
I would stand up for you.
Oh my god.
It's just the way you said it was very...
I don't want to...
That could be your mother, but sexy.
Okay.
You have absolutely proven yourself to be a Jewish ally.
Let's pretend it's the Sabbath.
Now, I don't know what you know about the Sabbath, but you can't turn on
lights, you can't drive your car.
That's why they have like what's called the Shabababababababababab and turn on your TV for you because you're not supposed to work.
So let's pretend this is a Sabbath and will you turn this on for me?
Oh my God!
Why would a penis smell like a vagina?
We're here because there's been a rise in anti-Semitism.
So we're on the streets trying to find some pro-Semitism. I don't believe in thi what what what thi what thia what thia thia thia thia thia thia thia thia thia thia thia thia thia thi thi thi thi thi thus thus thus thus thus thus thus thus thus thus thus the thus thus thus thus thus this is this is this is this is this is this is this is this is this is this is this is this is this this this this this this this thus. thus. th. the the their their their their their their their their their their their th. I th. I thus thus thus thus thus thus thus thus thus thus thus thus that that that that that that that that that to that that that that that that that thus th on the streets trying to find some pro-Semitism.
I don't believe in hate in any form, so I don't care what you walk a light,
religion, culture. I don't believe you should hate on anybody. Just bring love.
Agreed. You are officially a Jewish ally. You win two Kanya tickets. Are you going to go?
Hell no, I don't like Kanye.
Yeah.
Thank you, New York City.
All right, stay tuned because when we come back,
America's youngest member of Congress will be joining me on the show to hire can be like trying to find a needle in a haystack.
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Welcome back to the daily show. My guest tonight is the first Gen Zier elected to Congress.
He's here to talk about his journey from gun reform organizer to legislator, representing what he calls the mass shooting generation.
Please welcome Florida Representative Maxwell Frost, congratulations on being elected to Congress the same year you were
old enough to rent a car.
There we go.
There's no.
Who have you bonded with in Congress?
I mean, I'm guessing the squad, Obs, but any oldies?
Yeah, well, I don't know if I want to say their names now because now I'm calling them oldies. I mean, more mature? Yeah, yeah, look, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, their, their, their, their, their their their their their their their, their their their their, their, their.. their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their.... Congratulations. their, their, their, their. their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their.. We. We. their, their, their. their. their. their. their. their their th. their th. th. th. Congratulations. Congratulations, the the the the the th. the the the the th. the their, the theto say their names now because now I'm calling them oldies.
I mean more mature.
Yeah, look, there's so many people that I've gotten to connect with, you know, folks who are,
who have been just doing great work.
Barbara Lee, Maxine Waters from Villa Jopal.
Yeah, Jamie Raskin.
Yeah, so many amazing people out there. I wouldn't call them oldies,
but you know, senior members of Congress who are doing amazing work.
Yeah, they're not oldies, they're goodies. Yeah, they're goodies. There we go.
You have been, and I find this so impressive and inspiring, especially to people out here,
you've been a gun reform advocate since you were 15 years old.
Spurred on by Sandy Hook, which was in Connecticut,
you're from Florida, and you organize the march for our lives.
All these things that, you know...
They got my pin on too.
It's the five-year anniversary of the Parkland shooting.
There is a school shooting just last night at Michigan State.
Now that you are in Congress, what do you think can be done?
How can we break this cycle?
Yeah, well, we saw Congress pass a bipartisan bill
to help end gun violence last year.
It's not everything that we need, but it's a good step forward.
The fact of the matter is we need a governing majority that's actually going to care about about about about about about about about about about about about about about about about about about about about about about about about about about about about about about about about about about about the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their their their the of the matter is we need a governing majority that's actually going to care about this issue. And you know this word bipartisanship is
supposed to mean what everyone can agree on. Most NRA members and Republicans are
four universal background checks, but the definition of bipartisanship in
Congress means what the NRA will allow. And because they're a front for the
gun lobby, they have these politicians bought off and they're unwilling to stand up for what the people want so we can't get things like background checks passed and
so there's a lot of work that needs to be done a lot of it involves kicking
people out and replacing them with morally just leaders who actually give a
damn about children's lives and people like that.
But in the interim I think we have an opportunity. I mean overturning Citizens United would certainly help us out. That's th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, tho, thi, thi, thi, their their their their their their their their their their their their their tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, thi thi thi thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, tho, thoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo, thi, thi, thi, the, I think we have an opportunity. I mean, overturning Citizens United would certainly help us out.
Yep, 100%.
Yep.
That's one of the issues to end all issues.
Yeah, that's the big one and that's the root of so much of this.
So now that you've seen how Congress operates kind of from the inside, are you hopeful?
Do you see that there's changed possible?
Are you excited about America's future or is it depressing?
Both?
I'll say I'm very hopeful.
You know, a lot of times on the outside, you might look in and say, there's only a
small group of good people and everyone else is a corporate hack and they don't care
about anyone.
But having conversations with my colleagues, I've been so surprised by so many people who I get in the conversation with them and I their their their their their their their, and I'm their, and I'm their, and I'm, and I'm, and I'm, and I'm, and I'm, and I'm, and I'm, and I'm, and I'm, and I'm, and I'm, and I'm, and I'm, thi, thi, their, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi.ei.ean, thiiiiiii.eii.eii.ei. I'm, thi. I'm, thi. I'm thi, thi, thi, th get in the conversation with them and I find out what they're about and their values. And I'm like, okay, you know,
like you're actually a lot more progressive
and forward thinking that other folks might think.
And I think the problems people have smaller goals
because they understand the landscape
and the battlefield that we have in Congress right now.
And I think when we get the courage that they need
to stand up for what we need in this country.
More of this.
I mean, I think a lot of Gen Ziers tend to not trust the government.
How do you think you can change their minds?
Well, I understand, first off, like, you know,
and this is something I, like, running for Congress,
I had to think about the fact that during the Black Lives Matter protest,
I was tear gas mace arrested and jailed for nonviolent protests.
Now I represent those same streets in Congress,
but I still have to square the fact that I'm a part of the system that causes a lot.. and I get it. And I think part of what we need to do is make government more accessible, bridging the gap between cool and consciousness.
And I think that's a really good way that we can bring younger people into the fold.
And march our lives at a great job of that, and with the movement.
It was like the cool thing to be at the marches is the cool thing to lead to more young people getting involved. I mean if the marches could translate to votes more directly, it would be ideal.
Yeah, there go.
But, you know, maybe election day off would be a nice start.
Exactly.
And, yeah, I agree.
And vote at turnout is up for young people.
You know, we have record highs of youth voted a turnout. It's never been the largest piece of the pie but young people right now are
voting at higher numbers than any other generation when they were our age and
half of Gen Z you can't even vote yet. So we're not where we want to be but
we're going in the right direction. You brought pussy-ass bitch.
It's now in congressional record because of you so So I just personally want to thank you for that.
And that was about a certain person too.
It was about, well it was about a pussy ass bitch.
What's so inspiring about you is that you got involved as a teenager and how that can manifest into real change.
And so I think it's exciting.
Gen Z is so exciting to me because they're so motivated, they realize their power and
that can really change things. I mean, trying to get Gen Z to trust the government,
how about just trying to get Gen Z to be the government? And I think you've done that. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. that. that. that. that change that change that change that change change change change change change change change change change change change change change change change change change change change change change change change change change change change change change change change change change change change change change change change change change change change change change change change change change change change change change change change change change change change change change change change change. th change. th change. ths. I mean, trying to get Gen Z to trust the government, how about just trying to get Gen Z to be the government? And I think you've done that.
No, it is exciting. I think we see a lot of young candidates running across the country.
And look, it's not like Gen Z was waiting to get in Congress. I'm the oldest a Gen Z can be the year can be. We just got old enough enough enough enough enough enough enough enough enough enough enough enough enough enough enough enough enough enough enough enough enough enough enough to to to to run enough enough enough enough enough enough enough enough enough enough to to to to to run to run to run to run to run the to run the to run the to run the to run the the to be the to be to to the to be the the to the the to to the to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their their their their their their their their their their. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the jumped at the opportunity. Because we want to be a part of the solution.
We want to be at the table.
We don't want to be the only people at the table, but Congress does not look like our country
right now, right?
Like Gen Z. Millennials make up a third of the country.
We're nowhere.
the third of government, both local and to the decisions they're not lower, they're closer to the people and closer to the decisions that matter on a
daily basis. Yeah, being involved in those, the midterm elections and all, every
everywhere down the ballot is essential and I feel like the right realizes that.
Yeah, they do. And they're more organized around that than we are. That's why they've played this long game of taking over th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the the the the the the their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, th.. thi. thi. thi. thi. the. the. to. toe. toe. toe. toe. th. th. th. to. their, their, their, their, their, their, That's why they've played this long game of taking over the state legislatures. It's why we woke up last year and Roe versus Wade was gone.
That's a plan that has been a long time in the making. So Democrats, I feel like
sometimes we're too obsessed with these short-term goals. We need to be
about power-building in these communities long-term. It's not going to happen overnight, but that's how we're going to wake up in morning and have our freaking rights back, right?
Yeah.
Okay, we'll take a quick break, but we'll be right back after this.
Thank you.
That's our show for tonight.
I'd like to support Second Nurture.
It's a non-profit organization working to increase the number of families who choose
to foster and adopt children and teens by creating a support system every step of the way.
If you can, please donate to the link below.
And also, Happy Birthday Janice!
I love you so much.
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