The Daily Show: Ears Edition - TDS Time Machine | Jon's 2024 After the Cut

Episode Date: December 27, 2024

Jon Stewart shares stories of high-security interviews with the former Pakistani President, book recommendations, advice to young people, messages of hope, and whether TV is dying.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

John Stewart here. Unbelievably exciting news. My new podcast, The Weekly Show. We're gonna be talking about the election, economics, ingredient to bread ratio on sandwiches. Listen to The Weekly Show with John Stewart wherever you get your podcasts. Hey everyone, Desi Lydic here.

The Daily Show is on break for the holidays, but in the meantime, we put together some special highlights for you. We'll be back in the new year on January 7th with all new episodes. What do you think about young people getting all of their information and entertainment from social media? I see no problem with it. Why would you? It seems great.

Is that true? I mean, I don't know, because obviously. TV is dying. Don't what? No, don't. Sir. Well, let me ask you a question. In your mind, seeing as I work in television, will I die first?

Because if that's the case, I don't mind. But don't you still watch TV, but you just watch it on your computer. On TikTok, on your phone. Right, but you understand that that's still TV. It's just you're watching it in a different delivery service. It's like heroin is heroin, whether you snort it or shoot it, it's still an opiate for the masses, as is television. You're just getting it in smaller bites.

But it's still TV. We make it. Unless you have to look at your face like, this poor boy. If he only knew the business he was in. Well, I hope we don't die quickly and stay. And you're here, and we're making TV for you tonight. Welcome to The Daily Show. I'm your host, Jon Stewart, captain of this dying medium. Why would you even say that to me?

Gentlemen, tell me tonight. He said, oh, I'm so happy to be here. You know your television is dying. I said, I am aware. And in fact, I'm contributing to it. You're welcome. Out of all the interviews that you've had in these many years, is there one that stands out as the most profound?

Most profound interview? Well, so I've interviewed people like literal dictators, like people that have killed people. Like, I don't know if you remember, Pervez Musharraf was the leader of Pakistan, and this was post 9-11, so, and Al-Qaeda had been threatening him with an assassination. Now, I've had great, like, Malali Asafzai and Bishop Desmond Tutu, Jimmy Carter,

like, people of pure goodness. Like, you just, they vibrate on a different plane of kindness and goodness than most people. And you can feel it on them. And then you have dictators. Slightly different vibe. So Pervez Musharraf, it was only memorable because, so he was at the time the president of Pakistan and he was under assassination threat. He had just written a book. And it was his autobiography, I think.

And so he came here to the show to promote it. And that day, we had snipers on the roof. We had AK-47s in the hallway, guys marching. We had bomb dogs. We had, I mean, it was a level of security that I had never seen before. And I realized, like, this man is risking his life to tell his story on this show.

I should have read the book. That's how I remember thinking, is I thought, on this show, I should have read the book. That's how I remember thinking is I thought, oh, shit. I feel terrible now. Here's this guy's. He could die, and I'm just going to be like, so is Pakistan hot? Like, I didn't know shit. So the crazy part was, even with all that security layer,

in the studio, they put a Kevlar front on the desk. This was no bullshit. Many of you are younger, so you don't remember. After 9-11, we all lost our minds safety-wise. So they put a Kevlar front on the Daily Show desk. And I'm in there, and I'm looking at it. And I say, because there are Secret Service agents from both countries, America and Pakistan, in the room.

And I go, tell me about this. What's going on? And they said, well, if somebody manages to get through any kind of security issues and tries to assassinate President Musharraf, we will jump and push him down below the Kevlar to protect him from the bullets. And I said, you know funny thing is I'm also, you know, because you you know, I understand.

He'll be there, and then I'll be sitting there. What should I do? Without missing a beat, a New York City cop walks by and he goes, you should fucking duck. Oh dear god now you are these are one of those that are always wrong because it's like I was six years old you would come on my paw and I yeah I'm curious, knowing what you know now, if you went back to the early 90s, is there anything you would have advised us or done differently, like different guests, like somebody that you didn't have or not?

On the MTV program? Yeah. You watched that show? Because it was like, I think the first guest on the MTV show, the premier episode. Now this is, so I should explain something because there are younger people in the audience. MTV was a cultural force in like the 70s, no in the 80s I guess it started, right, with a video killed the radio star with the Buggles.

And then from there it was really cool. And then, I don't know what the f*** happened to it, but my first guest was Howard Stern, was the first guest, and he came on and he said, you suck, the set looks ridiculous, you'll be canceled in six weeks. And I just sat there like, don't say that. But, you know, it was such a different kind of show. I think the two guests on that first show, it was Howard Stern, a boy that ate cheese into the shape of states. Who was referred to in all the production documents

as cheese Boy. The crazy part is Cheese Boy is probably like 50 now. Cheese Boy is an ophthalmologist. But we had so much fun, but it was such a different ethos. And then we went to... I was hired to replace Arsenio, which makes total sense. And, uh... And so you can imagine how that went. And, uh... And then that got canceled.

I remember the last two weeks of that show were just chaos. Like, it's good that they took us off the air because someone was going to die. Like, uh... Marilyn Manson was on the show. He lit a fire during his performance. An actor smashed a mug and cut his hand wide open. And the final one was there was an act called The Birdman of Vegas.

And The Birdman of Vegas had a condor act. I don't know if you've ever been around condors. They're gigantic. They were probably like, there's my size. Not that I'm gigantic, but in the bird world, I'd be badass. Like, if I woke up on a pigeon, the pigeon would be like, I don't want any problems.

But the bird, there's like six feet tall. So he's doing the bit, and the bit is, his assistant is there and the condor will fly from his arm to the other arm. And it's a giant bird with a wingspan of 12 feet and it flies over. But the bird apparently wasn't going to do that that day. Instead, what it did is, it flew into the audience. And so a giant condor just started pecking the shit.

Like, and then the audience starts chanting, sue them, sue them! And I'm just like, I'm... And we were, like, canceled. We were already canceled. I was just like, I will let the birds kill everyone. I don't give a f***. But that was, that was the experience there.

So if you say like, would you have done anything differently? I'd be like, I guess I would have made sure the condors were leashed. How happy are you to be back? How happy am I to be back? How happy am I to be back tonight? Tonight. You know, I don't know if any of you have ever had to slog it out one day a week like this. It is...

You know, I don't know what you guys do, and I... Listen, this is not to disrespect your work ethic or any of the things that you are, but, you know, it was around 3 o'clock today, 3 o'clock in the afternoon, and I remember turning and looking at somebody and saying, I just don't know how much longer I can do this. You know, because it was almost four. you know, because it was almost four. No, it's been I have to say it's it's been lovely. You know, I have been in hibernation for a few years with with my family, and I would never give that back. Like it was it's been wonderful. And Covid played very much into my social leanings

in terms of reclusiveness. So once a week is about right for me with people and for people with me. The best piece of advice. Wow, that is such an end of life question. That really is, nobody ever comes to like a 22 year old Wow, that is such an end of life question. That really is. Nobody ever comes in like a 22-year-old and like, best

advice. And they're like, beer on liquor, never been sicker. All right. The best advice, I'm trying to think of good advice. I don't really, I don't seek counsel in that way. Do you, like, a mentor, I didn't have a mentor. This was back in like late 70s, early 80s, so there were no mentors. I was raised feral, so I don't have a ton of,

a ton of advice. Oh, here's one, this is a good one. So I used to host a show on MTV, it was a talk show, and then it got bought by Paramount to replace Arsenio So I was the natural replacement for Arsenio Because I think a lot of people are like hey the hip African American guy. Let's stick a maybe small Jew in his place and see what happens and so the show was on for like nine months and it got canceled.

And we were all very sad. And when your name is on it and they tell you to get out of the building, like it's very hurtful. David Letterman came on the final show. And on the final show he said to me, don't confuse cancellation with failure. And I thought that was really interesting. And then in the commercial break he said, although this is also a failure. And I thought that was really interesting and then in the commercial break, he said although this is also a failure.

He just he just didn't want me to confuse it. John Stewart here unbelievably exciting news my new podcast the weekly show we're going to be talking about the election economics ingredient to bread ratio on sandwiches. Listen to the weekly show with Jon Stewart, wherever you get your podcasts. I mean, the same world for young people right now. Oh, you're good.

How old are you? I'm 22. Oh, you'll be you got so many. We're going to f**k this that. We're gonna ruin this so much But you have no idea what we've got planned You are walking into Thunderdome No, you're gonna honestly like we do this all the time every generation like even the greatest generation like complete I mean they dropped atomic bombs on people. Like, don't let the perspective, we always think that the world is at its worst in the

moment that we're in it, but like, you have to remain optimistic because the images that they present to us are to heighten your fear. That's how they make their, oh, you're going to love the show tonight, I think. You're going to love the show tonight. I think. You're gonna love the show. But, but, so what are you, what are you, what are you thinking? I think a lot of young people are a little bit not happy with the contours of candidates from power. I guess we feel like our vote, our voice doesn't matter. Oh, it so matters. You, in fact, your voices, can I tell you something about advertisers?

Do you know that advertisers, they look at different demographics? But the largest demographic that they look at is 18 to 24. That's the one that means everything to them. Use that power, the power of the person. I'm 61. I'm not even listed anymore. Like literally companies would be like,

what about people over 55? And they're like, I think they might be dead. Like don't discount the power that you guys have. You have a tremendous amount. I would think on Instagram. I would tell them on Instagram. But I don't know. This is the fight, man.

No generation ever feels empowered or seen or any of those things. But what I would suggest is trust your discomfort, because you clearly feel it. But discomfort is a wonderful motivator. It's sort of the difference between stress and anxiety. Action is the antidote to anxiety. And if you feel anxiety, it will lessen as you take action.

Small actions, like a little bit every day. I have young people that live in my house. And I usually see them after three when they've woken up. And generally, they just want me to make them a bagel. So it's different. But honestly, like, that discomfort will spur you on. I'm sure of it. And your generation.

And then you'll be in a position to save us, but you won't want to. I have a question about college campuses. You had a question about college campuses? OK, so the cafeteria, if you want to go by the Quad, you're going to look for the Quad. Usually the food is near the Quad. I just wanted to ask you a few advice about navigating political advocacy, especially during election season

and college campuses and engaging conversations with people from the outside. Listen, the beautiful thing about college is that it's built for you to push the limits of who you think you are and who you think you want to be. And it's a wonderful experience. The thing that I would say to you is have the courage in the internal barometer that

you've developed over the years for yourself about right and wrong, and don't necessarily just allow the conditions that you find yourself in to shape that. You're here for a reason, and you're that way for a reason, and be strong in that. And learn, be open to people, but be convicted. It's, you know, I think it's a wonderful experience for kids, and I don't worry about, you know, Gen Z, they're so f***ing, shut the f*** up. You know, it's, every generation's like,

that generation sucks, we were awesome, and I was like, meh. I know my generation, like, we were doing Whippets in 11th grade, like. What's a book you think everyone should have on their shelf? Wow, that's a great question and I really thought you were going to end it with what's a book. Um, because you get that a lot from the kids now. Sir, I have a question. What's a book?

And I was going to say, it's like a movie. You flip. I would say, so this may sound antiquated, I was, I feel like I was raised on Kurt Vonnegut. And so any Kurt Vonnegut, I had the whole from player piano to breakfast of champions to Slaughterhouse Five to, you know, all of them. And he was my favorite author by far. And I felt like he educated me in the genre of optimistic, cynical humanism.

Like the thing that you're talking about, how do you maintain? So he's a guy who was an author who came of age, he fought in World War II, he saw Dresden. That's what Slaughterhouse Five was about. It was about his experiences, seeing the worst that people could do. And people always mistook his cynicism as, or his, I guess I should say, his dryness as cynicism.

But it was really idealism. He believed so much in people that he couldn't help but be somewhat disappointed that we were blowing it in the way that we were blowing it. But I would say line your desk with Kurt Vonnegut, and you cannot go wrong, and I was lucky enough to get to interview him when he hadn't passed away yet. No, but he came on, and when he passed away, his son sent me, he was also, and when he passed away, his son sent me a, he was also a really wonderful caricaturist, sent me a doodle

of his that he had inscribed to me before he passed. So it's one of my most cherished, but I would say, Kurt Vonnegut, you can't go wrong. And like Playboy. How do you maintain a sense of hope and levity when time is running out? How do you keep laughing through all that? Right. How old are you? I'm 19.

19 years old and the world's already beat the shit out of you. Isn't that? It's always the young dudes that are like, I have a quick question, I'm 19 years old. when hope is gone, when the darkness slowly creeps down. I'm 61, so I'm already in injury time. So I'm good. I'm actually weirdly always optimistic. I think maybe that is the horizon of history. I came up at a time in the 60s where we had all these great leaders and we killed all of them, every single one.

And then we went to Vietnam and law and then Watergate. Like, shit was just unraveling. So I do think it gives you a sense of, oh, it's always a mess. And what that makes you realize is, oh, so it's just, that's the game. We buckle down, you got to lunch pail it, and you carry it through. You're 19, someday when you're 61, and people will be saying, how do you maintain optimism? You maintain optimism be like you have no fucking idea what it was like when I was a kid like you will be that guy to be able to say like you think it's bad and obviously look it is if these are tenuous times and and maybe even we'll talk a little bit about that

on the program tonight no but but because part of the issue is, like, you just want someone to talk to you like you're a human, like you're an adult, not like it's a work, not like it's they're spinning you, or any of those, and that's my biggest complaint with all of this, nobody expects perfection, everybody knows that the obstacles and all the things that are going to be thrown in front of us are going to be arduous.

That's life. Like, it's, life is hard, you know? But you just want someone to not bullshit you when what you know you see in here is what you see in, like, that's all that you can really do. But how do you maintain, you're 19, so you're 19, so are your friends optimistic or pessimistic or do they not talk about it, or are they just on Discord being racist? What is going on?

I think a lot of people are pessimistic. I mean, how do I maintain optimism? Yes. I try to laugh, I watch the Daily Show. So here's the only thing I would say. I'm glad you do that. But really, we write it for eight-year-olds. So 19 is a little above our pay grade.

But is it? I do remember 19, like that age, there is a certain existential anxiety that creeps in, because the world does, listen, it feels out of control. You probably know more about it now than we did when we, I think one of the things that's probably harder for kids now is you are, the amount of information that you absorb is probably, but I would imagine hopefully your brains will evolve to, you know, because when I was a kid, like, TV happened and everybody's like, righ- Don't sit in front of the TV and eat and just watch TV. And now you'd be so happy if your children would do that.

Like, you'd just be like, don't send pictures of your dick to people, like. Hey everybody, John Stewart here. I am here to tell you about my new podcast, The Weekly Show, coming out every Thursday. We're going to be talking about the election earnings calls. What are they talking about on these earnings calls? We're going to be talking about ingredient to bread ratio on sandwiches. I know you have a lot of options as far as podcasts go,

but how many of them come out on Thursday? Listen to The Weekly Show with Jon Stewart, wherever you get your podcasts.