The Daily Show: Ears Edition - The DHS Splits Up Families at the Border | Johnny Knoxville
Episode Date: May 30, 2018Immigration officials break up families at the U.S.-Mexico border, and Johnny Knoxville talks "Action Point." Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.comSee omnystudio.co...m/listener for privacy information.
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May 29, 2018. From Comedy Central's World News Headquarters in New York, this is the daily show with Trevor Noah.
Ears Edition. Welcome to the Daily Show. Thank you so much for tuning in.
I'm Trevor Noah. My guest tonight, my guest tonight, star of the new movie Action Point
and the man who won our hearts by crushing his nuts. Johnny Knoxville is here everybody.
The first, the first, we were off for a week and it is really so great to be back on the
air. So much happened while we were gone. We got the British remake of Get Out. God himself
got me-toed. We'll soon be able to binge watch the Obama's. The North Korea summit crashed
harder than solo. Harvey Weinstein got to live out his handcuff fantasy and the NFL announced the players are welcome to publicly protest as long as they do it in private. their their their their their their their their their their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. th. th. thi. thi. to to to be to be to be thi. thi. toe. toe. toe. Somea. Somea. Somea. Somea. Somea. Somea. Somea. Somea. Somea. Some. Some. Some. Some. Some. Some. Soe. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. We. We. We're. We're. We're. We're. We're. We're. We're. We're. We're. We're. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te And the NFL announced that players are welcome to publicly protest as long as they do it in private.
And honestly, my favorite story is what happened over in France,
a story that climbed to the top of the news.
A man who migrated from West Africa to Paris,
he's not being hailed a hero after a daring Spider-Man-Saheim-Sahe-Ski. A four-year-old M-a-Sk-Sk-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-liiiiiiiiiiiiiiii-s. to-s. to-s. to-s. th whate, th whate, th whate, thnc-s. thiiii-s. thi-s. thi. thi. thi. thiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii-s. to-s. to-s. to-s. to-s. to-s. to-s. to-s. to-s. to-s. to-s. to-s. to-s. to-s. to-s. to-s. This is some amateur video that captured the boy dangling from an apartment balcony on Saturday. 22-year-old Mamadou Gossama jumped
into action. He scaled the building, climbed to the fifth floor just in time
to save the boy's life. The French president rewarded him with a French
citizenship and a job as a firefighter. Yeah, wow. Wow. You know, no matter how much I see that video, I'm still shocked every single time.
That dude is amazing.
Like, I wouldn't climb that high for my own baby.
You know?
That's just be like, jump.
Daddy will catch you.
I don't know.
And although I am proud of him, I'm a bit disappointed that he gave the game away
that the t do that kind of stuff. Yeah, you're supposed to keep the Wakanda stuff on the down low.
Now anytime someone in the high-rise can't find their phone, they're going to be like,
damn Africans, they must have snuck in. That's what, they can climb up.
Oh no, here it is, but they can do that. And you know what, it's really cool that it's really that that that that that that that that that that that that's really that that that's really that that that that that's really that that that that that the the the the their their their their their their thi thi thi their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their thi. throomoomoomorrow. theoomorrow tiiiiii. tomorrow tomorrow tomorrow tomorrows. th. the. thea. their their the other migrants are going to try extra hard to save kids, right? Every game of hide-and-seek will be broken up
by an African and be like, I found him, I found him. He was behind your kittens,
ah? Am I a citizen now? Citizen, yes? And you know for me, oh, the best part of
this video is it shows you why every country needs immigrants because they work so much harder because I th know th know th know th know th know th no tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho thi, thi, thi tho tho tho thi, thi thi thi thi, right thi, right thi, right thi, right thi, right thi, right thi, right thi, right thi, right thi, right th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thee thee thean thean thean, thean, thean, thean, thean. thean, thii. Every thi. much harder. Because I don't know if you notice this,
but at the bottom of the video,
there's a white guy who's also trying to climb up.
Yeah, yeah.
That's the result of 10 generations eating croissons and puff pasties.
That's what that is.
So congratulations.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah. result of 10 generations eating croissants and puff pasties. That's what that is. So congratulations. But let's move on to today's big news breaking in Hollywood.
This is CNN breaking news. ABC has canceled Roseanne because of racist tweets
today from its namesakes star among the offensive remarks Rosanne Barsen out was
this one quote Muslim Brotherhood and Planet of the Apes had a baby.
She follows this by an equal sign in the initials VJ.
VJ stands for Valerie Jarrett, the former senior advisor to President Obama.
That's right, Roseanne's show canceled because she tweeted out racist stuff.
You know who I blame for this?
Donald Trump. That's who. Yeah, because he makes th the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the, the thoome, thuuuuoome, thoome know who I blame for this? Donald Trump, that's who.
Yeah, because he makes all of his supporters
think that there is impervious as he is.
Yeah, he's just like, come on everyone,
you can twee twee tweat,
you can tweet whatever you want.
Nothing happens.
Yeah, was it?
Wasn't so bad.
It was bad.
Roseanne is out because of Twitter.
Oh, and speaking of Twitter, if you logged on this weekend,
you probably noticed something big.
I got a new banner.
Yes, that was one thing. And, no, for real, and you also, and you, and you, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, tho, tho, is th, is th, is out, is out, is out, is out, is out, is out, is out, is out, is out, is out is out is out is out is out is out is out is out is out is out is out is out is out is out is out is out is out, is out is out is out, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. to, to, to, to, th. to to, was to to to to the. to, was to, was to, was the. to, was to, was to, was to, was to, was too. too. too. to, was to to trending topic, hashtag, where are the children?
Most of you were probably like,
I wonder what this is about.
And one of you was probably thinking,
oh shit, the jig is up.
But actually the hashtag was about this.
The Washington Post reports the US lost track
of nearly 1,500 immigrant children in the last three months of last year.
The children crossed the border with Mexico on their the were taken into custody. They were placed with adult sponsors in
the US. Last month, the Department of Health and Human Services officials said
the agency had lost track of them. The Department of Health and Human
Services lost 1,500 immigrant children. How do you lose 1, if you want to find them, just let Archelly sniff a piece of their clothes.
He'll find them.
Yeah. Come on, Pied Piper, use your powers for good.
Now, if you were only reading the headlines and the tweets,
you'd be thinking right now that the Trump administration had captured and then lost 1, their thiiiiiiiiiii. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. to to to to too. too. too. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. ti. ti. ti. ti. to to to toe. toe. toe. toe. too. too. too. too. too. too. too. too. too. too. too. too. ttt too. t t t t t t toda. toda. toda. toda. toda. toda. toda. ti. toda. ti. ti. ti. ti. were like, this is an outrage. How could Donald Trump lose our precious immigrant babies? I'm so angry I could scream! Because
that's how these things start, right? Someone reads a headline, then they start a
hashtag. People retreat the hashtag without doing their own research and
that creates a snowball of outrage. But the truth is, Trump hasn't lost track of any kids. There may be a reason that these 1,000, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thr-a, thr-a, thr-a, tho, tho, tho, the, th, th, the, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thr-a, thr-a, thr-a, thr-a, throoooooooooooooooooooooooooooom. thr-n, thr-a, thr-a, track of any kids. There may be a reason that these 1,500 children
can't be found right now.
They may not want to be found.
The Department of Health and Human Services says
that the children are not missing, rather they are unaccounted for,
because their sponsors have refused to respond to follow-up calls.
All sources in the shelters for the children tell CNN.
Some sponsors And some sponsors could be undocumented as well and don't want to interact with U.S. immigration
officers.
Yeah, you see, it turns out these immigrant kids aren't lost by Trump.
They just don't want any contact with anyone in the Trump administration.
Sort of like Melania.
Now, at the same time as this was happening, another misinformed immigration scandal
blew up online.
Someone tweeted these photos of the US government
holding undocumented children in cages.
And again, without doing research,
people online lost their shit.
The president has caged our precious children.
He's milking them like cows! What has become of our republic?
Impish! But once again, this group of people didn't get its facts straight.
Because you see, those kids, unfortunately, yes, they were sleeping in cages.
But this picture was from 2014 when the president was slightly less tan.
Right.
And what was weird for me was that when people thought it was Trump, they were like,
what kind of monster would put children in cages?
And then they found out it happened under Obama Obama and all of a sudden they were like, look, I mean, sometimes kids gotta be caged, you know, and cages are complicated things.
I mean, there's good cages, you know, Luke Cage, Nicholas Cage, the bird cage.
The point is I've deleted my tweets, but still impeach!
And look, I understand that people do genuinely care about this issue, but sometimes it pays to slow down.
Let's take a breath.
Let's read past headlines before we start sharing misleading stories that Trump will use to discredit all other news.
He's going to do it. He did it with this story.
So, just so we're on the same page, Trump didn't lose 1, their 1,500 kids, and his administration didn't put those kids in cages. But right? But don't worry, you can still hate him.
Because he and his administration have started doing something that is way worse.
Attorney General Jeff Sessions announced tough new immigration policies that will go into effect soon
that will separate parents and children caught illegally crossing the border.
If you are smuggling a child, then we will prosecute you.
And that child may be separated from you as required by law.
How can someone so cute be so evil?
Because although Trumple Stilskin over here is smiling while he's saying this,
you have to admit this is a heartless way to deter people from coming into the US
illegally?
There are less cruel ways to discourage people from coming into the US.
Instead of taking their kids away, why not just force everyone crossing illegally to look at this picture of Ted Cruz at the Rockets game?
Why not do that? Yeah. Which by the way, I don't blame James Harden for missing all those shots. Imagine trying to play with that the to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. toe. toe. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm just. I. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. toe. toe. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. t crowd. You tell me you would make a shot. In fact, I wouldn't be surprised if Hardin made a shot, saw Ted Cruz smile and then was like, oh, I'm never doing
that again. Yeah, yeah. And this new policy's cruelty is it isn't just in how it separates
kids from their parents. It's how Trump's people don't even seem to care about what's going to
happen to the kids once they've taken them them them their their their their their their their them away. White House Chief of Staff John Kelly has dismissed criticism of this policy shift,
saying during a recent interview with NPR, the children will be taken care of,
put into foster care or whatever.
Foster care or whatever.
Yeah, that totally makes it sound like you care.
Was he that nonchalant when he was in the Marines?
General, what's the plan of attack?
When I give the signal signal signal signal the signal we we we we we we we we we we we we the plan of attack? When I give the signal, we go in with the guns and something, something,
and then like, whatever.
Now, when this policy first started,
I think President Trump was probably thrilled with it.
He was like, we're taking kids away from their parents,
pack your bags, Eric, we're going to the border. Come on Eric, let's go. But as it turns out, as it turns out, the blowback from this policy has been so fierce
that even President Trump is now going, uh, it wasn't me.
President Trump falsely laid the blame for the policy separating children from their
parents at the border on the Democrats. The president tweeted out Saturday morning, put pressure on the Democrats to end the
horrible law that separates children from their parents once they cross the border into
the United States.
Wow, really?
This is the Democrats responsibility.
Even for Trump, that's a terrible lie.
Come on. Everyone knows the Democrats don't run shit.
But that should just tell just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just the the the the the the the the the the the to be the the tell you how awful this real policy is. This is the first
thing ever that Trump doesn't want to put his name on. We'll be right back.
We'll be right back.
to stream soon on Paramount Plus. This is Dr. Frazier Crane. I'm listening. He's back again.
Hey Dad, I got a question about punctuation. Ooh! No, stay on task.
And he's more Frazier than ever.
How do I look?
Rich.
Just what I was going before.
Oh my God, they traded your baby for wine!
Do you really think we would trade John for white Zinfandel?
Or any wine?
Frazier.
New season streaming September 19th on Paramount Plus.
Welcome back to the daily show.
My guest tonight is the creator of Jackass who stars in the new movie Action Point.
Please welcome Johnny Knoxville.
Johnny Knoxville. Welcome. Thank you. You know, I've watched your movies for a very long time.
I obviously was a fan of jackass.
I was telling the audience before you came out that like my mom hated me watching your shows.
Welcome.
Thank you.
You know, I've watched your movies for a very long time.
I obviously was a fan of jackass.
I was tell the audience before you came out that like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, their their their their, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I their their, I, I was their, I was their, I was their, I was their, I was their, I was their, I was the audience, I was their, I was the audience, I was the audience, I was the audience, I was the audience the audience the audience the audience the audience the audience the audience the audience the audience the audience the audience the audience, I was the audience, I was the audience, I was the audience, I was the audience, I their their their their their their thi, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like this is white people doing crazy shit with their lives.
Like you know my favorite line my mom used to say to me
she's like this is how you know white people
haven't been oppressed enough.
She's like we wouldn't do that.
Like how are you still alive?
Like when are you gonna stop?
I don't know I don't know how I'm still alive or when I'm going to stop to stop to stop to stop to stop to stop to stop to stop to stop to stop I'm going to stop I'm going or when I'm going to stop. I can't keep doing it forever.
But it feels like you can though.
I mean like that clip that we saw, so in a normal movie we go like, oh yeah, that's
whatever, but that's you.
That's me.
That's me.
That's you tumbling in the dirt.
That's you doing every single stunt.
Yes, and the was tough,
but they were actually excited by the fact to be able to do them like that because they
never get to do that.
Yeah, because it's not safe.
It was the place, Action Park, the place that inspired this movie was like the most dangerous
theme park in the history of the world.
It was in New Jersey, not far from here.
Oh yeah.
And the owner's like, I'm not gonna hassle the kids
with a bunch of rules, I'm gonna leave safety up to them.
That sounds like President Trump,
as a theme park owner.
He's like, regulations, so many regulations folks.
No more seat belts just enjoy. I actually like Gene Malvehill, the owner.
So for those who don't know, this is a story about you're playing a theme park owner,
like one of the worst theme parks ever where there's just everything going wrong.
And everything that goes wrong happens to you for real in the movie.
And you know what's crazy, here's my thing.
If like Tom Cruise says I do my own stunts, thia like there's harnesses and then like he rides the bike
and he's doing that itself, or he like tries to look a tall person in the eye type thing, right?
But when you, when you say I do a stunt, you are falling, you are hurting yourself,
do you have? Do you have health insurance? Like what Obamacare do you have? I have very good health insurance. In the clip you saw, I got a bad concussion and it almost cost me my left eye. I didn't know
it. I went to the emergency room for the concussion and I got back to my hotel room and
I had a little blood. And we shot in Cape Town. Right. You have excellent hospitals in
Cape Town. I can tell you that right now. I, thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you very much.
When I blew my nose, my left eye popped out of its socket.
And I was expecting that, you know?
So I popped it back in and had to go back to the emergency room.
So let's take a step back.
Because I feel like you move through this with a casualness that's not a, like befitting what you, the their, their, their, their, the, the, to, thiii, to, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, to, to, to, to, to their, their, their, their, their, and I their, so their, some, some, some, some, some, some, some, some, some, some, so. Some, so. So, so, so, so, so. So, so, so, so. So, so, so, so. So, so, some, and, and, the the the the the the the their, andness that's that's not a like befitting what you just described right so you blow your nose and
Your eye comes out of your head. Yes, and at this point you you put your eye back?
I was frightened, you know, yeah, yeah, I get but you just you put your eye your own eye back. I poke it back in
Because what else am I supposed to do?
You know? Yeah I mean...
So is your eye like... so what do you do? You go back to filming after that?
Well they couldn't film the last... they couldn't film the left side of my face, the last few...
do's days of the movie? So, and actually five days after the first time it happened, I was out drinking with
Chris Panius and he said something funny.
And I laughed and I held my nose when I laughed and my eye popped out again.
But I had a pirate's patch on my eye so I just pushed on the patch and it was fine.
Okay I need to understand why the eye popped is this like a thing now of yours? What had happened? What had happened? I had, they said when on impact in the clip you just saw,
the orbital lamina bone disappeared on impact. And when I was blowing my nose, I was blowing
air behind my eyeball in pushing it out of its socket. You know what I find fascinating about you
you is not just the fact that you have all these injuries but even now you just you just bandy the two, like my orbital lamata.
Have you, like do you have a medical degree now?
Just from how much time you spent in hospitals being hurt, I feel like you know every bone
in your body because you've broken every single one of them.
Yeah, I'm pretty, I see doctors a lot. I have 25 doctors in my phone and I go to see them quite often.
How do you, like, so you're making this movie, right?
I mean, movies are about acting, but you're getting hurt in the thing.
How do you now act after you've done something?
Like, so they go like, and cut.
All right, Johnny, that was great. Let's do we do it again or? No, I set my stunts up because that's a thing.
I don't like doing stunts twice.
Well, yes, because that's, yeah.
Right, because so I try to make them as a big a disaster the first time, so I don't have
to do themthe first time and you, oh, it's, it doesn't, it's not good.
You know, it's funny, if most actors were saying this, they would seem pretentious if they're like,
I don't like doing my stunts more than once, and with you, I'm just like, yeah, you, like, thank you for your service.
That's what I feel like, I should be saying to you, you're one of the craziest human beings I've ever come across. The movie is wild and people who love your stunts like me are going to enjoy it. Thank you so much for coming to the show.
Thank you so much.
I appreciate it.
Action Point will be in theaters June 1st.
Johnny Knoxville, everybody.
The Daily Show with Trevor No.
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Streaming soon on Paramount Plus.
This is Dr. Frazier Crane. I'm listening.
He's back again.
Hey dad, I got a question about punctuation. Oh, no, stay on task. And he's more Frazier than ever.
How do I look? Rich. Just what I was going before. Oh my God, they traded your baby for wine!
Do you really think we would trade John for white, Zinfandel? Or, uh, any wine?