The Daily Show: Ears Edition - This Week in Presidential Hopefuls: Pence, Christie, Haley
Episode Date: June 7, 2023Revisiting some of the Republican Presidential candidates' greatest hits, from Chris Christie's time as New Jersey Governor and his 'Bridgegate' scandal, to Mike Pence's feud with Trump post January 6..., to the controversial Pastor that opened Nikki Haley’s First Presidential Campaign Rally. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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You're listening to comedy central Central. Today is unfortunately a sad day because today we mourn the departure of another politician.
New Jersey governor Chris Christie.
Chris Christie leaves office today and becomes a private citizen for the first time in
eight years and he does so with low approval numbers.
But in his final state of the state address last week, he says he leaves as a happier man than when he walked into the office eight years ago.
I don't know how Chris Christie can be happy when he's leaving office with the lowest
approval rating in New Jersey history. 18 percent. Being that unpopular in 2018 and
not having a sexual assault allegation. That shit takes talent.
But some people may not know that Chris Christie's reputation wasn't always the third on
the bottom of New Jersey's shoe.
So tonight, we take a look back at Governor Christie's incredible rise and fall.
When Chris Christie first took office in 2009, his straight talk approach was a breath
of fresh air, you know, something New Jersey hadn't had in decades.
And throughout his first term in office, Christie became extremely popular in New Jersey,
especially among key demographics, you know, like guys who go, hey, guys who go,
oh, and of course women who go, get out of here, Anthony, you ruin my daughter's sweet 16.
What I'm trying to say is he got very popular.
He is a rising star in the world of politics.
It's people who raise their voices and yell and scream like you that are dividing
this country.
We're here to bring this country together, not to divide it.
Superstorm Sandy left much of the Garden State devastated,
but it's really boosting the popularity of New Jersey Governor Chris Christie.
94% approve of Governor Christie's handling of Hurricane Sandy recovery effort.
74% approval rating in the bluest of blue states.
The highest approval rating recorded for a New Jersey governor.
A landslide re-election victory. Is he now the man to beat for the Republican presidential the to th.. th. th. th. th. th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, the, the, the, the, thi, thi, thi, thi, the thi, the the thi, thi, the thi, the the the the the to to the to to the the to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the thi, the thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, threaty threaty, threaty, the, threaty, thi, the threaty, thi, thi, thi, the thi, the the the thi, the The highest approval rating recorded for a New Jersey governor.
A landslide re-election victory.
Is he now the man to beat for the Republican presidential nomination?
Wow.
Chris Christie was so popular, people thought that he could one day be president.
And people only say that about the top governors, and first-term senators,
and TV stars, and sports owners, and relatives of presidents, and Beyonce.
Okay, yeah, I'm saying the Bionseys thing.
I am.
But alas, alas, despite all his success, Chris Christie had the fatal flaw of a tragic character.
He was an asshole. And don't get me wrong, don't get me wrong.
In New Jersey, you can be an asshole.
I mean, asshole is their state bird.
But Christie was an asshole about the one thing no one in Jersey is willing to tolerate.
Traffic.
Bridgegate.
This, of course, is the political scandal surrounding the office of Governor Chris Christie
over the shutdown of lanes to the George Washington Bridge.
This came as apparent political payback against a mayor who would not endorse it.
I am embarrassed and humiliated by the conduct of some of the people on my team.
That seemed like an apology until it got to the end.
I'm so ashamed of what these dipshits have done.
The lesson we all learned from Bridgegate was,
you can't get back at somebody by pissing off everybody else.
That's going to backfire.
It's like getting revenge on a mean flight attendant by releasing a bunch of bees
in the plane.
You guys are with me, you guys are with me?
I requested vegan!
So off the Bridgegate, Christie's approval ratings plummeted
from the 70s to the mid-40s.
But that's a level that you can recover from.
So Chris Christie had two choices.
Buckeled down and work hard for the great state of New Jersey,
or ditched those spray tan-s-hand-s-s-s-s- consulted his what would asshole do bracelets. He chose option two and it was all downhill
from there. Governor Christie is getting grilled about prioritizing the campaign
trail over his snowy and flooded state. The governor spent all or part of
261 days out of the state last year. Right after dropping his own presidential
bread, Christie endorsed Trump. Seven newspapers in New Jersey have
called on Christie to resign.
Christie's approval rating stands now at only 21%.
18% now tied for second worst in recent history.
The second worst approval rating.
Poor Chris Christie.
You know what his problem was?
In 2012, he didn't run for president when he should have.
And then in 2016, he ran
when he shouldn't have run. His timing was off. And in life, timing is everything. Timing
is what separates a normal person from a pedophile. And... And here's what makes Chris
Christie a legend.
Having hit such a low point, a more ordinary governor would try to raise his popularity.
But Christy, Christy's a special person.
He decided that if he was going to be the worst, he would be the best worst.
First, there was Bridge Gate and now Beachgate.
Christy's beach outing over the 4th of July holiday caused a national scandal because
because this particular beach was closed to the 4th of July holiday caused a national scandal because this particular
beach was closed to the general public due to a state government shutdown.
The Garden State's first family was allowed to use the otherwise closed beach.
The photos have enraged many New Jersey residents.
I don't apologize for it.
I don't back away from it.
And I think my poll numbers show that I don't care about political optics. Hey man. Say what you want about Chris Christiestri-I the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the to the to the to the to to to the the the to to the the to the to to to to be. I. to be toe. toe. I's. I's the the beach the the toe. toe. tooes. I toe. I'm toe. toe. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the poll numbers show that I don't care about political optics. Hey man, say what you want about Chris Christie, he went down in style.
Read my lips, people, this beach is shut down.
Now if you have any questions, I'll be at the beach.
And then just to rub it in, he built a special sand castle for everyone.
Which is probably why, on this last day of his term,
the people of New Jersey told him
how they felt.
When asked about the end of Christie's term, only 5% said they will miss the Republican
governor.
Just 5% will miss him.
Chris Christy, my friend, now that you're not governor, are you sure that you want to stay
in a state that hates you that much? Like if I were you, I would just leave................ A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. I'm just, to. I'm just. I'm just. I'm just. I'm just. I'm just. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to...................................................................... to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. If you get out now you can miss all that bridge traffic. So much has happened
this campaign season. I mean between finding out Ted Cruz's dad killed Kennedy,
John Kasek's struggle with tapeworm, well partnership with tapeworm I should say,
and that whole Jeb Bush wedgey incident, I mean there was a time when we thought that would be the biggest biggest the biggest the biggest the biggest the biggest thiiiiiiiiiiiii. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thin, thin, thi, thi, I thi, thi, thi, thi, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, th. th. th. I'll th. I'll th. I'll th. I'll thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thateeeeat that thr-I's thateat, thr-I's thr-I's toeat, thr-s me me mea' thr-s. th mean, there was a time when we thought that would be the biggest moment in the race.
And look, none of us remember it now.
None of us, can you remember it?
No, we all forgot it.
It's a similar thing with Chris Christie, because we forgot.
It was only a few months ago that the New Jersey governor slash soprano's
extra thrands in debt.
So Christie spent millions of dollars and didn't get out of Jersey, or as they call it, the
reverse Springsteen.
And so after dropping out, he endorsed Donald Trump, which seems normal now.
But at the time, the announcement had people reacting like this.
Chris Christie shocks the political world by endorsing the frontrunner. The biggest high-profile endorsement that Trump has received.
A jaw-dropping endorsement.
Sent shock waves throughout the Republican Party and beyond.
For several days, everyone in politics was in shock, including Chris Christie.
I mean, look at that face.
That's the kind of face you make when you're trying to remember if you used the condom last night. That's the look look look look look look look look look look look look look look look look look look look look look look look look look look look look look look look look look look look look look look look look look look look look look look look look look look look look look look look look look th. thi. that that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that that that that's trying to remember if you use the condom last night. That's the look you have. And if you did which side of it were you on, that is the look
that he has. So everyone was wondering why Chris Christie would do such a thing.
But people always forget that when you sell your soul to the devil, you're
still getting something in return. And last Thursday, we found out what that was. Donald Trump spedding this evening in central. this evening in this evening in this evening in this evening in this evening in this evening in this this this this thiii. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the th. the the the th. th. the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. t. t. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to, t. t. t. t. t. t. to. toda. t. toda. the. the. t. the t. t betting this evening in central New Jersey, he was at a fundraiser in
Lawrenceville for Governor Chris Christie.
The $200 per person event was designed to pay off Christy's $200,000 debt from his failed
presidential run.
You know, Chris paid off his entire campaign debt tonight.
Right?
His entire debt.
Yeah, we did it.
We did it.
I mean, we could have given that money to charity, but let's
be honest, Christie's the real tragedy here. Come on. Yeah, there's probably kids in Africa
going, no, no, I mean, I know me, but have you seen his face? No, give him their money.
Give him, I'll wait for next time. So yes, Trump helped wipe out Christie's debt in just one night. And all Christy had to do was endorse a man who a few months prior, he had said this about.
I just don't think he's suited to be president of the United States.
Why? I don't think his temperament is suited for that, and I don't think his experiences.
Yes, I don't think he's suited, and yet now he is. And also, why are they walking along along along along along along along along along along along along along they they they they they they they they th walking, and th walking, and thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. th. thi. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. the. the. thi. It's an interview, not a high school date. I don't understand.
Unless this is Christie's game.
Yeah, I'll meet you for an interview.
8 p.m. at the kissing booth.
See you there.
Totally business.
Now, look, we understand there's going to be a certain level
of backscratching in politics.
But this level of payback is seldom is thi You know, I mean, it's right in our face. It's like a couple joining the Mile High Club on the Isle of a plane.
Like, have the decency to at least go into the tiny bathroom. At least.
At least.
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It's been said that nice guys finish last.
But is that really true?
I'm Tim Harford, host of The Cautionary Tales podcast, and I'm exploring that very
question.
Join me for my new miniseries on the Art of Fairness.
We'll travel from New York to Tahiti to India on a quest to learn how to succeed without being a jerk.
We'll examine stories of villains undone by their villainy and monstrous self-devaring egos,
and we'll delve into the extraordinary power of decency.
We'll face mutiny on the vast Pacific Ocean,
blaze a trail with a pioneering skyscraper,
and dare to confront a formidable empire.
The art of fairness on cautionary tales.
Listen on the I-Heart Radio app, Apple podcasts.
Or wherever you listen to be so unlikable that Congress never goes through with impeaching President Trump.
But another part of his job is representing Trump to America's allies around the world,
which sometimes gets a bit awkward.
In Germany today, Vice President Mike Pence found little agreement with this country's allies
on many key issues.
Vice President Pence, in the eye of the storm,
scolding Europe's top officials for sticking with the Iran nuclear deal
and evading US sanctions.
It was a chilly reception from the moment he arrived here
at the Munich Security Conference last night.
I bring greetings from the 45th President of the United States of America, President Donald Trump.
Last August. Wow.
Not a single person in that room clapped.
He mentioned that. Like even the crickets left.
They were like, kuh, no, you're right.
Hashtag not my president, yeah.
That is the most awkward thing to happen to Mike Pence since he watched Magic Mike Mike Mike by mistake.
That, mother, I think they made their shirts disappear.
And to be fair, that room probably does hate Donald Trump.
But Mike Pence would be the worst hype man for anything.
Like if you put him on stage with a super popular rapper, it'll be like, females in the crowd
if you're enjoying your evening, please make yourselves heard artibly at this time................. That. That. That. That.. That. That. That. That. That. That. That. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, mother, mother, mother, that, mother, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, in the crowd, if you're enjoying your evening, please make yourselves heard artably at this time.
He was in Colombia today,
whereas Donald Trump calls it, South Mexico.
And he was there to monitor the situation
across the border in Venezuela,
where things are getting more tense
than Mike Pence's own eyebrows when he tries to look tough.
The crisis in Venezuela reaching new heights over the weekend
as President Nicholas Maduro closed the border with Colombia
and Brazil in an effort to block humanitarian aid
from the US from getting into the country.
Vice President Pence arrived in Colombia today
to meet with Venezuela's opposition leader Juan Guaido.
Our efforts to date will not only continue, they will be increased.
Despite Maduro's brutality, we will press on. Okay, whose idea was it to send Mike Pence to solve the crisis in Venezuela?
Like, is the plan just to bore Maduro out of power? Is that what it is?
But you're just going to be like, okay, okay, enough about your mother, I'll leave already. Also, I think it's a little risky to send Mike Pence to South America.
What if he accidentally eats spicy food?
Like, I mean, this is Mike Pence.
If he has too much salt, he needs to goggle with, like, holy water for an hour.
Also, by the way, I feel like Mike Pence goggles with his mouth closed because he doesn't want to seem gay. He's like, blah, blooble, th th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th- th- th- th- th- thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, th, th, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, th, okay, okay, thi, thi, thi, thi. thi. thi. thi. thi thi thi thiii thi thii to thi thi thi thi thi thi thi. he doesn't want to seem gay. He's like, rob-blobbblblblbl.
Last December, China became the first nation to land on the far side of the moon and
reveal their ambition to seize the lunar strategic high ground and become the world's
preeminent spacefaring nation.
And let me be clear, the first woman and the next man on the moon will both be American astronauts,
launched by American rockets from American soil.
Wearing American apparel,
holding an American girl doll,
and paying with American Express.
I'm not gonna lie,
this announcement kind of took me by surprise.
Mostly because I was surprised to find out that Mike Pence believes the moon exists, you know? No, no, no, no, he seems like the kind of guy who thinks the devil-pil, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the tho-nex. the the the tho- next th. th. necks the next the next the next the next the the the the the the the the the the the next. the next. the next... the next the next the next the next the next the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the neaaq is.. neaq is. neaqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqq. nec. nec. nec. nec. nex next next next next next nex next next next nea next nea next nea next nea next next nea next nea next next nec. nec. nec. ne was surprised to find out that Mike Pence believes
the moon exists, you know?
No, no, no, he seems like the kind of guy who thinks the devil put the moon there to
make us think about nipples, you know?
Also, I like that American people believe you can just like fix any of its current problems,
you know, just by rebooting your old greatest achievements, you know,
like next week, Mike, th is th is th is th is thens is thens is thens is thens is thens is thens is thens is just, thens is just, thens is just, thus, thus, thus, thus, thus, thus, thus, thus, thus, thus, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, th............... I, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, took, took, took, took, took, took, took, took, took, took, took, took, took, thi. thi. thi. thi. And,. You know, like next week, Mike Pence is just gonna announce that he's sending a special ops team
to the bottom of the ocean to re-murder Osama bin Laden.
We'll do it again, folks.
All right, moving on.
This next story involves Mike Pence,
vice president and man who avoids eye contact with Barbie dolls.
Because it turns out American Pharaoh bit him on the
arm.
He says he was helping campaign for Congressman Andy Barr last year when the two were invited
to see the prize winning horse in Luxington.
Pence says he and Barr were posing for pictures when American Pharaoh bit him so hard
on the arm, he almost collapsed. Oh yes, that's right.
The vice president was bitten by a horse.
And let's be clear, he didn't almost collapse from the pain.
He almost collapsed from the pleasure.
Oh, it hurts so good. Don't tell mother about this.
As everyone prepares themselves for what the 2024 race will be like with Trump,
there's one party, there's one part that'll be different this time.
And that is one of Trump's biggest ass-lickers, is going to be leaving his ass very dry.
Nearly two years after a mob of Donald Trump's supporters attacked the Capitol,
disrupting the transfer of power, and chanting
Hang Mike Pence.
Trump's once loyal vice president is finally telling his story about what happened that day.
The president's words were reckless.
And his actions were reckless.
The president's words that day at the rally endangered me and my family and everyone
at the Capitol building. Given all that you witnessed in the Capitol on that day at the rally endangered me and my family and everyone at the Capitol building.
Given all that you witnessed in the Capitol on that day, this is a pretty straightforward question,
a yes or no, do you believe that Donald Trump should ever be president again?
David, I think that's up to the American people. But I think we'll have better choices in the future.
Hell yeah! Good for Mike Pence, telling Donald Trump,
you almost got me and my family killed,
which is why I'm now prepared to say
that it's possible there are better alternatives to you
in the next election,
although that decision will be up to the American people.
You tell him, Mike Pence, ooh, you tell him Mike Pence, who you tell him. Who?
Who?
Who?
For real though, man, it's a simple question.
Do you support Trump or not?
I can't believe Mike Pence is the one leaving us hanging.
And I know why he's doing this, right?
I know why he's doing it. He doesn't want to go too hard against Trump, because he's still hoping to win over Trump's voters if he runs for president, th, th, th, th, th, th, who, who, th, th, who, th, who, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, who th, thinks, who thinks, who thinks, who thinks, who thinks, who thi, who thriens, who, who's thrike, who's, who's, who's, who's, who's, who's, who's, who's, who's, who's, who's, who's, who's thi, who's thi, who's, who's, who's, who's, who's, who's, who's, who's, who's why he's doing this, right? I know why he's doing it. He doesn't want to go too hard against Trump, because he's still hoping to win over Trump's voters
if he runs for president, which is so delusional.
Trump's people were the ones who wanted to kill him.
The only reason they would elect him president
so that they know for sure where he lived.
Why would they vote for you? And even? And even strategy works, it still makes him a punk-ass bitch.
It does.
I'm sorry, but this, this is not the type of man you want leading the United States.
All right? Well, you can't even say the thing out loud.
If Pence was present, forget China.
Canada would be invading.
Oh, sorry, sorry, sorry, we're going to take Oregon, eh? Oh, it just seems so easy.
Sorry, sorry, eh?
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It's been said that Nye Skies Finish Last.
But is that really true?
I'm Tim Harford, host of The Cautionary Tales podcast, and I'm exploring that very question.
Join me for my new miniseries on the Art of Fairness.
We'll travel from New York to Tahiti to India on a quest to learn how to succeed without being a jerk.
We'll examine stories of villains undone by their villainy and monstrous self-devaring egos,
and we'll delve into the extraordinary power of decency. We'll face
mutiny on the vast Pacific Ocean, blaze a trail with a pioneering skyscraper and
dare to confront a formidable empire. The art of fairness on cautionary tales.
Listen on the I-Heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts or wherever you listen to podcasts.
Let's start with today's big news about the 2024 presidential race. Someone has stepped forward to run against Trump for the Republican nomination and she's a lady.
Breaking news this morning. Former South Carolina governor Nikki Haley
is now officially running for president.
She is the first Republican to challenge Trump for that nomination.
She obviously served as his ambassador to the United Nations.
She announced as much just in a video a few moments ago.
You should know this about me.
I don't put up with bullies.
And when you kick back it hurts
them more if you're wearing heels.
Um, 1997 called it wants that joke back. Oh wait, it just called again it
wants this joke back. I actually thought this was a great ad and I'm excited to buy
whatever pharmaceutical product that nice lady was selling. But this is going to be a
tough race for Nikki Haley. Right now she's polling at just 1% and that's
pretty bad. I mean you know even Mike Pence is at 2%
Mike Pence's new rope is at 5% which is
V key material.
But you do get some advantages if you run against your former boss.
My opponent's economic plan is terrible and when he poops in his office we all hear him go,
out, ow, ow, ow, oh, oh.
Oh, oh, oh.
I love political satire. It's really my lane.
Nikki Haley, the former South Carolina governor and Trump UN ambassador has decided
to throw her hat of the ring and run against her old boss.
So I went to her campaign launch in South Carolina to see if the party was really ready
to turn the page.
Are you excited about Nikki Haley for president?
Very excited.
She's done great things for South Carolina. She's tough. She's a woman, women rule. The Republican Party
needs a change and we need some with Nikki's foreign policy expertise. I love
Donald Trump but I think that she has more of a feminine finis. You think Trump has a
harder time communicating with ladies. He has a harsher approach when it comes to
women. He sometimes has to pay for it, he sometimes has a hard time navigating it.
Yes, I mean I think she's really running again, like, I don't think she'll win.
Oh, so I think it's for BP.
So this is just sort of like batting practice.
It's just fun to be here, why not?
BP or president, I was curious to see how Haley could win over ardent Trump supporters. I voted for Trump, but I certainly will not be doing that again.
When did Trump lose your support?
The nail in the coffin for me with Donald Trump.
Let me guess.
Charlotte's Bill.
No.
Wait, let me guess.
You're not going to guess it.
Kids in cages.
Nope. Oh, okay. Wait, hold on. First impeachment. Nope. Second impeachment. Nope. Okay, uh, inviting white supremacist over to Marlago?
No, but I mean, you know, criticizing DeSantis.
Criticiz. Criticizes. Critician. Critician.
Wouldn't a guess it.
Wouldn't have guessed it.
So that's the line right though.
That was the nail at the thing. This is why you come out and talk to people, you're constantly surprised.
Yeah.
Haley has been either a strong Trump critic or a vocal Trump ally,
depending on the time of day.
Could this pose a problem?
Did you feel like she sufficiently stood up to Donald Trump when she needed to?
I think she has. and he's not afraid to stand up to any male or female with her voice of opinion.
Yeah, so after January 6th,
she wasn't afraid to say this is disgusting.
That's right.
And then a couple weeks later to say
they were being too hard on them.
Yes, yes.
We agree, I agree.
Totally.
An individual respects you if you can stand up to them.
So something awful happens like Charlottesville. She speaks her mind. Charlottesville happens, she's not afraid to criticize Trump,
walk right in there and hand in her 52-week notice.
Right is right.
She knows right from wrong.
It's a campaign that's distancing itself
from the far-right fringe.
Except if you look closely at Haley's first speaker,
Pastor John Hage, who has unusual views on the weather. As a candidate you have that responsibility to not get in the gutter so hopefully we can stay in a more
positive place. Well the first person I saw on stage was Pastor Hagey who
thinks hurricanes are a punishment for gay people. Is that really what he said?
How long ago was that? That was a that was wrong Katrina. Yeah yeah yeah. That's an
interesting opening act. Pastor Hagee has said that hurricanes were God's punishment for gays.
Oh no, it preaches the gospel.
I mean, I followed him for years.
Yeah, but maybe if she wants to attract moderates,
come in with a little bit more of a moderate pastor who thinks something more acceptable,
like tornadoes are caused by too much masturbation.
Oh my goodness. That, that's way out there.
That's too far.
Oh yeah. Got it.
And there's that line again.
Good to know.
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