The Daily Show: Ears Edition - This Week's Top Stories - Rudy Giuliani Gets COVID-19 & Louie Gohmert's Tooth Malfunction

Episode Date: December 12, 2020

Rudy Giuliani tests positive for the coronavirus after a whirlwind of public appearances, South African police shame maskless citizens, and Rep. Louie Gohmert's tooth falls out mid-speech. Learn more... about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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Starting point is 00:00:00 You're listening to Comedy Central. When 60 Minutes premiered in September 1968, there was nothing like it. This is 60 Minutes. It's a kind of a magazine for television. Very few have been given access to the treasures in our archives. But that's all about to change. Like none of this stuff gets looked at. That's what's incredible. I'm Seth Done of CBS News. Listen to 60 Minutes, a second look on Apple podcasts starting September 17th. Here in the United States, COVID-19 has finally struck its least surprising victim yet.
Starting point is 00:00:47 The coronavirus has again hit President Trump's inner circle. This time, it's his personal attorney Rudy Giuliani, who was admitted yesterday to Georgetown University Medical Center in Washington. Rudy Giuliani appeared on television Sunday morning, claiming President Trump's fight to overturn the election results was making progress. Just hours later, the president revealed that Giuliani tested positive for COVID-19. He spoke in Arizona, Georgia, and Michigan, often without covering his face. I don't want you to do this if you feel uncomfortable. But would you be comfortable taking a mask off so that people can hear you more clearly? Can you hear me now?
Starting point is 00:01:26 Man, that woman did not want to take off her mask. Did you see her? She was like, mother-fixie, I can see the corona on you. Get out of here with that shit. So yes, Rudy Giuliani has tested positive for the coronavirus, although he is suing to have that result overturned. But for now, it doesn't look good. And the truth is that Rudy has only got himself to blame for this. I mean, this dude was going all over the country, refusing to wear a mosque.
Starting point is 00:01:53 What do you expect? If I go around licking car windshields, I can't be shocked if I get bird flu. Or if I go around drinking at bars until 3 a three a ammmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm a.m. I can't be surprised when I go home with your mama. Oh! And as much as you might have some schadenfreude about this thing, Rudy Giuliani testing positive for COVID-19 is a terrifying new development. Because you realize up until now we didn't even think that dead guys could get Corona. But look, we all wish Rudy Giuliani a speedy recovery. I want him to get back to the days when his hair was melting off of his head. Nobody wants to make jokes about Rudy having a deadly disease. What we want is to make jokes about how Rudy farted
Starting point is 00:02:36 on camera at an election hearing, like full-on trumpet blast. This happened in Michigan on Wednesday. And I'm pretty sure that you will hear it, but you will definitely know it The moment when it happens by watching the face of the woman sitting next to him I'm just hoping to get an answer to the other questions about you. Mr. Barr and others who have disprovened a point of order the answer the answer that I gave you is they didn't bother to interview a single witness just like you. They don't want to know the the the the the the the to to the to the to the the to the to to the the to the the to to the the the to the the the to the the the the the their their their their their their. I?? I? I'm their. I'm their. I'm their. I'm? I'm? I'm? I'm their. I'm their. I'm their. I'm their. I was. I was. I was. I was. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I'm the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the te. I'm the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the like you. They don't want to know the truth. Well you probably know the truth. I'm worried about they're not wanting to know the truth. Oh man, the look that she gave him.
Starting point is 00:03:17 You know that look she gave him like, I knew I should have worn a face mask around you, smelly bitch. And it was so loud! It sounded like his butt was demanding a recount of his lunch. Although, to be fair, that fart is no worse than any of the other legal arguments Trump's campaign has made so far. In fact, it's entirely possible that that fart was part of Rudy's legal strategy. You know, everyone in the room is going to be like, oh, oh God, all right, fine, yeah, just Trump is president forever, just don't do that again, please, Trump is president forever. And before you say, no, Trevor, it's never good to fart during a dramatic hearing.
Starting point is 00:03:52 Let me remind you that it works in all the best courtroom dramas. You want answers! I want the truth! You can't handle the truth. Cinematic genius. The United States Senate. It's the home of the two least intimidating street gangs. And right now, the future of the Senate is on the line in Georgia, where Republican incumbents, the two least intimidating street gangs. And right now, the future of the Senate is on the line in Georgia, where Republican incumbents, Kelly Loflafah and David David Perdue are both facing tough democratic challenges in runoff elections.
Starting point is 00:04:29 So to give Lofler and Purdue a boost, the GOP is pulling out its biggest gun. Donald Jango Fat Trump. All eyes on Georgia, those two critical Senate runoffs heating up the control of the Senate at stake. President Trump hosted an outdoor rally in Georgia in support of the two Republican senators locked in a special election battle. The rally in Valdosta, Georgia was the first one since the November election. It was very important as Republicans try to keep the Senate in their control. At the urging of Kelly and David, my administration
Starting point is 00:05:02 took historic action to protect growers of Georgia blueberries, peppers, squash, and cucumbers. Who does cucumbers around here? Because I like cucumbers. Can you, I'm the only one? I like cucumbers. I like cucumbers. Yo guys, Trump doesn't care anymore. I mean like he even cares less but he doesn't care. He'll just say whatever pops into his mind now. Who likes cucumbers? Who likes cucumbers? I'm the only one. They've got that green screen, but it's bumpy. It's so green, so bumpy like it's got warts. I had a wart once, but it got removed. I wanted to put it in a little jar, but they wouldn't let me. It would have been my best friend.
Starting point is 00:05:45 And look, of course Trump loves cucumbers. It's no surprise. I mean, yeah, he prefers them pickled and surrounded by a Big Mac, but still, that's a cucumber. So look, clearly Donald Trump is only going to be of limited help. But the GOP senancers haven't been able to help themselves much either. You see, both of them are in hot water over big stock trades that they made during the coronavirus pandemic. And that two debates yesterday, neither of them handled the issue well. First of all, Senator Purdue simply skipped his debate, leaving his opponent John Ossef to debate an empty lectern, which actually put extra pressure on Osseph
Starting point is 00:06:21 because imagine if you lost to a lectern. Like the voters are just like, oh, I don't know. I guess I like the the the the the the the the the the the the th th th like I like I like like like like like the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the strong like the strong like their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. So. So. So. So. So. So. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. if you lost to elect her. Like the voters are just like, oh, I don't know. I guess I like the strong silent type. And while Lofler did show up at her debate, after this exchange, oh, she might wish that she hadn't. Senator, should members of Congress be barred from trading stocks? Look, what's at stake here in this election is the American dream. That's what's under attack. When they attack me for a lie, a left-wing media lie, conspired with a Democrat spy.
Starting point is 00:06:54 This is an attack on every single Georgian who gets up every day to work hard to provide a better life for their family who wants to live the American dream. Wow, robot and Coulter nailed that. Because if you're trying to dodge a question, you just pivot to the American dream. She's got to be a role model for the kids in Georgia. Billy, did you flush a cherry bomb down the toilet? Look, Mr. Johnson, what's at stake here is the American dream. That's what we gotta be talking about. You're right, Billy. You're right.
Starting point is 00:07:28 And you gotta love how shady rich people always try to act like attacking them is attacking everybody. If you take away my helicopter parking spot, you're taking helicopter parking spots away from every American in this country. Now, let's be clear. Even though Georgia went narrowly for Joe Biden this year, it is still a very red state. And the Republican candidates do have an advantage. But ironically, Trump might be hurting their chances more than he helps. For Republicans looking at Georgia, there are questions now about whether the president's
Starting point is 00:08:02 baseless claims of a stolen election could actually depress turnout for those really important runoffs. When the president was down here in Baldasta, in a crowd that attracted thousands of people, he told them conflicting messages. He said the election was rigged, hey, but go out and vote January 5th for these two senators. So what message does that leave these loyal supporters of his with, it leaves many of them the the the the the the the their their their their their their their their their their the leave these loyal supporters of his with? It leaves many of them confused. This is exactly the kind of thing that Republicans are concerned about. They are worried that the president's message on election fraud could essentially backfire for Republicans. If he convinces voters that it's not worth their time to go out and cast their ballot on
Starting point is 00:08:36 January 5th because the fix is in. That's right. Because they indulged Donald Trump's bullshit claims of fraud, Republicans might have suppressed their vote so much that they could lose their Senate majority. In fact, you might say that Trump has put Republicans in quite the pickle. I like cucumbers. My man! The United Kingdom. America's a strange dad. Today, the UK began giving its people the vaccine. Yeah, officially, starting with a 90-year-old woman, which is great for her.
Starting point is 00:09:14 Although on the other hand, she's the only person in the whole country who's now safe to go out. So she's just going to be out hitting the club like, woo, where are all my party girls at? Seriously, where is everybody? Meanwhile, in the United States, it might take a little longer for everyone to get vaccinated, because somebody, and I'm not saying which president, well, he don't f-ed up.
Starting point is 00:09:37 With cases of COVID surging across the country, we're learning, millions of Americans may now have to wait months longer to receive a vaccine because the U.S. opted to get fewer doses from Pfizer than it could have. The U.S. bought enough to vaccinate 50 million Americans. By contrast, the European Union bought enough for a hundred million people with an option to buy more. Now, ABC News confirms the New York Times report that over the summer, Pfizer offered to sell the U.S. government additional doses, but the Trump administration turned them down. Now, Pfizer says it might not be able to get the U.S. more doses until June of 2021.
Starting point is 00:10:13 Woo! That's the art of the deal right there, baby. Pfizer thought that they could pull a fast one on Trump by offering to sell him life-saving vaccines, but my man, Trump was like, no deal. So now, Europe is stuck with all those vaccines, and that means more Corona for everyone here in America, baby. Wait. Seriously, though, this may seem like it was a dumb decision by Trump. But if you take a moment to think about it, you'll realize that it was a really fucking dumb decision by Trump. And let's be very clear about something. Even with a vaccine, social distancing and wearing masks
Starting point is 00:10:47 is still extremely important. And that's why people need to keep following public health guidelines. And I know, I know a lot of Americans are like, all these rules are government oppression. They're taken away out of freedom. It is my right to go to Walmart without a mask and to legally marry my gun. My gun's name is Mark. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. I. th. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thate. thea. the. the. thea. to thea. thea. thea. th. thea. th. the. the. the. the. the. And the. And th. And th. And th. And th. And th. And th. And th. And th. And th. And th. And th. And th. And th. And toe. And toe. And toe. And toe. And to to to to to toe. And toe. toe. toea. toea. to toea. toea. toea. toea. toea. toea. tea. name is Mark. That's right, my gun and I are gay. Did I challenge your stereotypes? But I gotta tell you this,
Starting point is 00:11:09 if Americans think that the rules in this country are too strict, Americans need to see how social distancing is being enforced in some other countries around the globe. For example, if you're upset because, oh, people give you dirty looks when you go outside without a mask, imagine if instead of that, the police pulled up in their cars and then roasted you over the PA system, because that's what's going on in South Africa, where videos like this one are going viral. Yeah, that's right. In COVID-19 you are a mask embleen. When the mask am I new? That's a mask emly.
Starting point is 00:11:50 Yeah, that's right. In South Africa, the police and the military are being tasked with enforcing the lockdown, which is basically a recipe for disaster. Yeah, that's right. In South Africa, the police and the military are being tasked with enforcing the lockdown, which is basically a recipe for disaster. Oh, and in case you're wondering, yes, the South African version of law and order is a very different show. In the criminal justice system, the people are represented by two separate yet and equal important groups. The police who roast your ass hard and the district attorneys who stand behind them going, damn son, he got you good. These are their stories. Here's an interesting fact.
Starting point is 00:12:31 That cop is also South Africa's top hostage negotiator. Hey! Hey, why are you kidnapping that guy? Let him go. What would your mother say about you? Look at you with that funny hat. Look like you f that funny haircut. Look like you're fucking a lawnmower. Then you lost, eh? Just go home.
Starting point is 00:12:47 But as harsh as South Africa's mosque justice might seem, what they do in Rwanda can be even worse. Rwandans breaking curfew or not wearing masks are being sent to stadiums for hours long overnight lectures about the dangers of the virus. I was in the shop I work in. My mask was on my chin. Then the police found me in my shop and said, you're not wearing your mask or it. Then I got in the car and they told me they were taking me to a place to teach me to wear
Starting point is 00:13:17 a mask. Man, that is intense. Rwandans are being forced to attend night school if they broke some COVID rules. Imagine that. If you don't like watching Dr. Fauci come on TV and ask you to wear a mask for 30 seconds, if you lived in Rwanda, you'd be forced to listen to Dr. Faulcce all night in a cold stadium. The only way that could be more boring is if there was also a baseball game going on at the same time. Although, one benefit of teaching about COVID rules in a sports stadium is that you can use the kiss cam to test how much everyone has learned.
Starting point is 00:13:49 Joseph, you and Kesa are on the kiss cam. Why don't you kiss? No, you shouldn't have kissed. It was a tru-up. It was a tr- wasn't arrested for public indecency. I was arrested for exposing myself like this and everyone was so upset just like everyone is right now. And finally, to any American who's upset because they can't go to the gym to work out during COVID. Imagine if instead of that you will force to work out in front of all your neighbors. Like many countries battling the coronavirus pandemic, India is in lockdown.. The police. The police. The police. The police. The police. The police. The police. The police, the police, the police, the police, the police, the police, the police here, the police here. the police here, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the thi. I th. I was here, I was here, I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I is th. I is th. I is th. I is th. I is th. I is here. I is th. I is th. I is th. I is thi. I is thi. I is thi. I was thi. I was thi. I'm thooooo the thate tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho th your neighbors. Like many countries battling the coronavirus pandemic, India is in lockdown. The police here have resorted to physical punishments for those who breach it.
Starting point is 00:14:31 At one point, police are seen ordering locals to do squats. Some were made to do precepts at the side of the street. Hunet, police on April 21st asked the lockdown violators to do sit-ups as punishment. God damn, guys, that is humiliating and unnecessary. I mean, what happened to just shouting at people to wear a mask? Forced exercise is so extreme. And let me tell you something now, I would rather staple a mask onto my face than have to exercise in public. That's like all your grade school nightmares coming back to life. You couldn't be bothered to wear th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. to the thu. to thi. thi. thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the, the, the, the, the the the the the the the, the, the, the, the. thean, thean, thean, thean, thean, theauuuuu. theau. theau. th like all your grade school nightmares coming back to life.
Starting point is 00:15:05 You couldn't be bothered to wear a mask, and now all your friends know you can't do five push-ups? On the other hand, it's a good alternative for people who can't afford a gym membership. Just pull your mask down, and the next thing you know you've got a personal trainer. In fact, if they keep this up, people from all over the world the world the world the world the world the world thuu. to take advantage of this policy. Oh my God, Deborah, you look amazing. What are you doing? Let's just say I ignored a few rules in India.
Starting point is 00:15:30 What does that even mean? When 60 Minutes premiered in September 1968, there was nothing like it. This is 60 Minutes. It's a kind of a magazine for television. Very few have been given access to the treasures in our archives. But that's all about to change. Like none of this stuff gets looked at.
Starting point is 00:15:51 That's what's incredible. I'm Seth Done of CBS News. Listen to 60 Minutes, a second look, starting September 17. Wherever you get your podcasts. Donald J. Trump, president of the United States and man who's in a bar fight with reality. Ever since he lost the election, his people have been going through every court in the country trying to find a judge who will help him unloose the election. But yesterday, he might have hit a dead end. The Supreme Court has now shot down an effort by President Trump's allies in Pennsylvania
Starting point is 00:16:30 in that overall effort to try to overturn the election. Terry, the U.S. Supreme Court seemed to send a very strong signal late today with a very few words. They sure did. This was brutal, David. No question about it. It took the Supreme Court court court court court court court court court court court court court court court court court court court court court court court court court court court court court court court court court court court, to to to to to to to the to to the the toe, toe, the toe, the toe, toe, toe, the too, too, too. too, too, too, to me, to me, to me, to me, to me, to me, to me, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the the the the the too.. too. too. too. too. too. too. too. too. too. too. too. too. too. too. too. the Supreme Court just 34 minutes between the time that President Trump's allies in Pennsylvania filed their brief in this case and a one-sentence order from the Supreme Court rejecting that entire case. No reasoning, just no. Get out of here.
Starting point is 00:16:57 And there were no recorded dissents by any of the justices, including Amy Coney, Barrett and Neil Gorsich and Brett Kavanaugh all of whom were appointed by President Trump. It came in a single sentence and we quote the application for injunctive relief presented to justice Alito and by him referred to the court is denied. Oof man Trump is taking else people. Not only did they shut this case down but they shut it down in just 34 minutes. They didn't even pretend that they were gonna consider it. This is like asking somebody out,
Starting point is 00:17:32 and they just shut you down immediately. Hey, would you like to go out with me? And Trump must be especially but hurt that the justices he appointed didn't do anything about this. Because in his mind, he thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, th. th, th, thu. thu, thu, th, th. th. thu, tru, tru, tru, tru, th. th. th. tr. tr, th. th. th. tr, tr, tr, tr, tr, tr, tr, tr, tr, tr. tr. tr. tr. tr. tr. tru. tru. tru. tru. tru. tru. tru. tru. tru. tru. tru. tru. tru. tru. tru. tru. tru. tru. tru. tru. truuu. truu. tru. tru. tru. tru. 't do anything about this. Because in his mind, he thinks that they owe him big time. He's probably like, what the hell, Brett? I stuck with you when everyone said you were a creepy drunk, but now you won't let me be president just because I didn't get enough votes. All of a sudden, now you know the meaning of the word no, Brett, huh?
Starting point is 00:18:02 I hate all of you. Neil, Brett, and you heard me most of all, Amy Coney Island. But here's the truth, man, you can't blame the Supreme Court for not wanting to get involved in Trump's case. Because we all have that one friend, that when you see them crying, you think, you know what, I'm just going to keep walking, because if I'm just I'm just I'm just I'm just I'm just I'm just the try I'm just the try, I'm just the the try, I'm going, I'm going, I'm going, I'm going, I'm going, I'm going, I'm going, I'm going, I'm just going, I'm just going the the trying, trying, the the the the thi, thi, thi, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the thrown., trime, try, try.ean, try.ean, trymea, trymea, try.ean, try.e, try.e, try.e, try. try the, the. try help, it's going to become a whole thing. So this looks like it could be the end for Trump's legal efforts, because he can't appeal a higher court than the Supreme Court. I mean, maybe he'll try appeal to God.
Starting point is 00:18:32 Who knows? Look, I know I'm only asking for your help when I'm walking down a ramp, but this one's important, big guy. And can we just take a moment to reflect on their their their their their their their their their their their their their the hard this past month has been for Trump's people. Because it's not easy to overturn a democracy. It's actually taking a physical toll on them. I mean, Trump's hair went gray overnight. His legal team is riddled with Corona, and now one of Trump's top supporters, Congressman Louis Gomer, is literally falling apart.
Starting point is 00:19:01 It was an embarrassing moment for Texas Republican Louis Gohmert. I have consulted, been with our Afghan allies many times since 2001. His tooth fell out in the middle of a press conference on Capitol Hill. The congressman didn't miss a beat. He quickly caught it with his tongue, tucked it away in his cheek, and kept speaking. Gomer tweeted later, accusing reporters of being more interested in a temporary crown coming loose than they were in covering claims of election fraud by the president.
Starting point is 00:19:38 That is the most disgusting thing I have ever seen in 2020. And remember, I've the the mean, I saw Rudy's hair melt. I saw a human woman marry an inside-out ferret, but as disgusting as it is, it's still pretty funny, man. I mean, Trump's fraud cases are getting knocked out of their court so hard that other people are losing their teeth. And it's not like Louis over here can give that tooth fairy because she's gonna be like, their, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, their, th, their, their, their, th, their, th, their, th, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, th, th, th, th, th, thu, thu, thu, thu, thr, thr-a, thr-s, thru. thooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooom. thu, thoth fairy. Because she's gonna be like, uh-uh, I didn't sign up with this shit. I have my teeth from kids, not middle-aged cabbage-patch dolls. And I love how you try to move on, like nothing happened. Did you see that? Huh? Try to move on, like a toothed, my man.
Starting point is 00:20:12 My man, my te. If that happened to FDR, even he would have been like, December 7th, 1941, a date which will live in infamy... Oh, shit my two. Forget it, congrats, Japan, you've won. Do you guys remember the 2020 presidential election? You know, it was the day when you voted for a president and a bunch of local races that you had to Google from inside the voting booth. Well, one of the stories we thought we'd never have the to to theee the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the thea thea thea' thea' theateateate-a'er-a'er-a'er-a'er-a'er-a'er. the-a'er. the. the. that's the. that's, the. the. that's, the. that's, the. that's, th. that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's that's that's that's that's that's that's the. that's that's theananananananuuu. that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's theanananananneea'ea'e. the. that you had to Google from inside the voting booth. Well, one of the stories we thought we'd never have to hear about again once the election was over just came roaring back to life. Hunter Biden and the president-elect's son says the US attorney in Delaware is
Starting point is 00:20:56 investigating his tax records. Sources tell CBS News, the FBI has been looking at a hundred Biden's taxes since 2018. Under Justice Department policy, law enforcement didn't actively pursue the case during the weeks before the presidential election to avoid politicizing the investigation. That's right, people. Apparently, Hunter Biden is under investigation for his taxes, and Donald Trump must be furious right now. Did you guys see that Hunter Biden is being investigated for tax fraud? I'm so angry. Sir, are you angry because you wanted to use it against his dad for the election? No! I'm angry because tax fraud is my thing. How's he stealing my thing? Criminals? And I'm not going to lie.
Starting point is 00:21:41 Hunter Biden announcing his own investigation? That's a pretty gangster move. I mean, usually you see pictures of people covering their faces when they run into court. You know, they're trying to hide that there's an investigation, but Hunter's like a guy coming home late at night like, oh, babe, you're going to want to go through my phone. Honestly, I think that in the end in the end in the end in the end in the end, in the end, in the end, in the end, in the end, in the end, the end, the end, the end, the end, the end, the end, the end, the end, the the the thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, the the the, the, their the, their their their their their their their their their their their their their their tho, tho, their thi. thi. thi. thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi. thi. thi. thi. thean. thean. thean. thean. thean. thean. thean. thean. thean. the spent four years with scandals 24-7. We can't just go down to zero scandals cold Turkey. And Biden's family is going to help us taper it down.
Starting point is 00:22:12 Like right now, Hunter has a tax thing. You know, but it's just a tax scandal. Maybe next year, Joe Biden asks the Ukrainian president for something inappropriate. But it's just the answer to a crossword puzzle. Just ease us off. Ease us off. Right now we're addicted to scandals. Now, look, we don't really know what, if anything, this Hunter Biden story will lead to. But, if he has done anything wrong, my advice would be to ask President Trump for a pardon before he leaves. And I know that may seem unlikely, but based on how Trump has been making it rain, anything is possible. Clark is winding down now on this Trump presidency.
Starting point is 00:22:45 With growing signs, he's planning what many see as a potential pardon avalanche. Axios, which often reports directly leaks out of the White House, says Trump telling an advisor he's going to pardon, quote, every person who ever talk to me. They're saying Trump isn't just accepting pardon requests, but blindly discussing them like Christmas gifts to people who haven't even asked. One source felt awkward because the president was clearly trying to be helpful, but the advisor didn't believe they had committed.
Starting point is 00:23:12 They had committed any crimes. I'm sorry, guys. I just love the story. Because the way the story is reported, it makes it sound like Trump is just whistling down the hallway likethe story is reported, it makes it sound like Trump is just whistling down the hallway like, I pardon you, I pardon you, morning Stephen, you're pardon, hello break room donut, you're pardon, but I'm still gonna eat you,
Starting point is 00:23:33 yum, yum, yum, yum, pardon donut in my belly. But yeah, that's right, apparently, Trump is saying he's gonna pardon every person he's ever spoken to, which first of all is too bad for Eric, and second, of course Trump is gonna give out pardons as Christmas gifts. He doesn't have to spend any money on them. But what I do love is that some of his advisors
Starting point is 00:23:53 are trying to avoid getting pardons, because get this, they know that a pardon would make them look bad. And so now they're trying to explain to to Trump. Oh, Mr. President, I don't really need a pardon because I didn't do anything. I'm not guilty of anything. Whoa, whoa, slow down. What does not guilty mean? Before we go, I wanted to remind you again
Starting point is 00:24:16 to please support your local restaurants if you can. I know not everybody can afford to, but if you can order some food in, because these restaurants are strugglinglion to to to to to to to to toeee to toe toe to be toe their their their their their their their their their their their their their, the, theckeckeckeckeck and to be the, their, to to be to be to be to be to, to, to, to, to be to be to be their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their...... the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. threate. threate. threaten, toea. toea. toea. toea. toea. toea. toea. toea. toea. toea because these restaurants are struggling to stay open during the pandemic and all their employees are going to be suffering and the restaurant won't be open for you when the pandemic is over. If you want to help beyond just getting the food, then please consider a donation to the James Beard Foundation's Open for Good campaign, which helps independent restaurants survive this pandemic. The Daily Show with Cove week week to to to to to to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the thinea week week week week week week week week week week week Independent restaurants survive this pandemic. exclusive content and more. When 60 Minutes premiered in September 1968, there was nothing like it. This is 60 Minutes. It's a kind of a magazine for television.
Starting point is 00:25:14 Very few have been given access to the treasures in our archives. You're rolling? But that's all about to change. Like none of this stuff gets looked at. That's what's incredible. I'm Seth Done of CBS News. Listen to 60 Minutes, a second look, starting September 17th, wherever you get your podcasts. This has been a Comedy Central Podcast.

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