The Daily Show: Ears Edition - Trump Does a Victory Lap Over the Death of ISIS Leader al-Baghdadi | Beto O'Rourke & Michelle Yeoh
Episode Date: October 29, 2019President Trump celebrates the death of ISIS's leader, Beto O'Rourke discusses his 2020 presidential run, and actor Michelle Yeoh talks about her role in "Last Christmas." Learn more about your ad-ch...oices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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You're listening to Comedy Central.
Hey everybody, John Stewart here.
I am here to tell you about my new podcast, The Weekly Show, it's going to be coming
out every Thursday.
So exciting, you'll be saying to yourself, TGID, thank God it's Thursday.
we're going to be talking about all the things that hopefully obsess you in the same way that they obsess me.
The election. Economics. Earnings calls. What are they talking about on these earnings calls?
We're going to be talking about ingredient to bread ratio on sandwiches. And I know that I listed that fourth.
But in importance, it's probably second.
I know you have a lot of options as far as podcasts go, but how many of them come out on Thursday?
I mean, talk about innovative.
Listen to the weekly show with John Stewart wherever you get your podcast.
October 28, 2019.
From Comedy Central's World News Headquarters in New York, this is the Daily Show, everybody. Thank you so much for tuning in and thank you for coming out.
Thank you so much for coming out. We're back. I'm Trevor Noah. We have two guests joining us tonight.
First, Texas Democrat running for president of the United States.
Thank you so much for coming out. We're back. I'm Trevor Noah. We have two guests joining us tonight.
First, Texas Democrat running for president of the United States,
Betta O'Rourke is joining us, everybody.
And then, you know her from Crazy Rich Asians
and Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon,
International Movie Superstar, Michelle Yo is joining us on the show.
It's gonna be a fun conversation with her.
Also on tonight's episode, Tick Tock is snitching on you.
The alphabet has been updated,
and a new position in ISIS has just opened up.
So let's catch up on today's headlines.
Let's start with TickTock.
It's the short video app for people who were bored
before the end of the sentence. But now, Congress is worried that although the videos is thiiiiiiiolk is the thiolk is thiolk, thiolk, thiolk, thiolk, thiolk, thiolk, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, th end of the sentence. But now, Congress is worried that although the videos
might be short, the consequences could last for a long time.
The app that's taken teenagers by storm, Tick Tock now facing a storm of a different
kind, accused of posing a possible security risk. With more than 500 million active accounts
around the world, now all eyes are on the people behind the app. Two top senators targeting
the Chinese tech company that owns Tick Tock in a letter to the director of
national intelligence asking for an investigation into Tick Tock and other
Chinese based companies warning they may pose a national security risk.
This is a threat to American security. When China has data on a hundred
10 million Americans, who knows what they do with it? That's right.
Chuck Schuma wants to launch an investigation into TikTok.
But I feel like he's just doing this so he can have someone come to Congress to explain
what TikTok is?
He's like, I try to subpoena my granddaughter, but she never returns my calls.
But for real, it would be very serious if the Chinese can use TikTok for spying.
Because, I mean, with this information, China can learn all of America's dance moves,
you know, they're just going to be figuring it all out.
They're like, yeah, oh yeah, we figured it all out.
That's the thing that's kept the US ahead of China all this time. China's they're like, we have nuclear weapons in thia, we have, we have nuclear, we have nuclear, we have nuclear, we have nuclear, we have nuclear, we have nuclear, we have nuclear, we have nuclear, we have nuclear, we have nuclear, we have nuclear, tha, thia, thia, thia, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thin, thin, thin, thi. thi. thiiiiiiiiiiiiiii. ti. ti. thii. thi. thi. thi. but we can't figure out how to hit the woe. When do you lock?
Oh.
And keep in mind, TikTok is like 90% teenagers.
So I'm not worried that China's watching me when I'm there.
I'm more worried that the dude from Catcher Predator is going to pop up and be like, Trevor, what are you doing here? I'm just here for the memes. I. I'm just. I'm just here. I'm just here. I'm just here. I'm just here. I'm just here. I'm just here. I'm just here. I'm just here. I'm just here. I'm just here. I'm just here. I'm just here. I'm just here. I'm just here. I'm just here. I'm just here. I'm just here. I'm just here. I'm just here for thi. I'm just here. I'm just here. I'm just here. I'm just here. I'm just thi. I'm just tick. I'm just just just thi. I'm just thi. I'm just thi. I'm just thi. I'm just thi. I'm just thi. I'm just thi. I'm just th. I'm just th. I'm just th. I'm just thi. I'm just thi. I'm just thi. I'm just thi. I'm just thi. I'm just thi. I'm just here for thi. I'm just here for ti. ti. ti. ti. ti. ti. ti. ti. ti. ti. ti. this point, let's just agree that every app is
spying on us.
Okay, just work under that assumption.
Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, they're all watching us.
The only app that somehow doesn't know your location is Uber.
That is the only one.
I'm strange tooons.
They just can't figure it out.
All right, moving on.
If you are a young child, just learning,the alphabet, first of all, please stop watching
this show.
Seriously, I might say, f-shk at any time.
And also, it turns out you've been doing it all wrong.
The new alphabet song, that's getting mixed reviews.
Yeah, you can say that.
This version aims to get rid of the infamous, O P and make it clear for kids take a
lesson
ABC D E F G
H I J K L M N O P Q R
O P Q R
O P Q R Oh, no.
First of all, no.
Secondly, hell no.
And third, this new Kanye album is a real departure.
It went real weird.
Who is this for?
Because if my kid can't figure out LMNOP, I don't want to make it easier for them.? Who is this for? Because if my kid can't figure out LMNOP,
I don't want to make it easier for them.
I just want to know as soon as possible so I can stop saving up for their college.
I just want to know.
I don't want to waste my money.
I mean, at some point, even as a kid, you would figure out that LMNOP are separate letters in the alphabet, right? There's no 40-year-old out there who's just like, excuse me, for the Wi-Fi, is it uppercase element OP or because it keeps saying
password incorrect? All right, and finally, here's a great new excuse for drunk
drivers to try. An Ohio man was pulled over for drunk driving and a
blood test revealed he had twice the legal limit of alcohol in his system.
But the driver swore to police.. the police, he the police, he, the driver, the driver, he, the driver, the the the the the the the the the the the the th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, tho, tho, thoomoomo, tooomoomo, toe, toe, toe, toe, toe, toe, toe, toe, thii, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, the, t te, ttttte, ttttipe, tipe, tipe, tipe, tipe, tipe, the driver swore to police. He didn't have anything to drink, and it turns out he was telling the truth.
Doctors say that man has a rare medical condition that turns yeast in your gut into alcohol.
It's called auto brewery syndrome.
Auto brewery syndrome.
That is the coolest disease I've ever heard of.
Like essentially when this guy eats carbs, inside his stomach,
a team of tiny hipsters turns it into beer.
That's what's happening, you realize that, right?
And obviously, I'm sure there are downsides to this.
Like, for one, he could never run a marathon,
because it's going to be like, oh, I got a carbo load, and all of a sudden it's like, actually, I'm going to skip the race, because, bitch, I need to dance.
But in my eyes, getting drunk for free is not a syndrome, right?
That's a super power.
Yeah.
Like, a building's going to be on fire.
There'll be some woman outside, like, all my stuff is in there, but no one's
drunk enough to risk their life to save it!" He's like, not so fast, my good lady. I'll freaking go in there.
But first, I need to take a nap, I need to take a nap.
Yeah.
All right, that's it for the headlines.
Let's move on, to our top story.
For the past few weeks, President Donald Trump has been having a not good time.
From the impeachment inquiry, to the chaos in Syria, to the controversy over hosting the G7 at his own resorts,
plus it's Halloween, so people try, keep trying to put candles in him.
But then, on Saturday nights, out of the blue, Trump tweeted, something big, very big, has just happened.
And with Trump, that could mean anything.
Did he buy Greenland?
Is the trade war with China officially over?
Did Trump finally learn that LMNOP isn't one long letter?
We don't know.
Well, on Sunday morning, we found out what that something big actually was.
Breaking news, President Trump announces ISIS leader Al Baghdadi has died during a U.S.
Special Operations raid in Syria.
The U.S. has been searching for Baghdadi for more than five years, a senior official
telling ABC that it was information obtained after interrogating a courier and one of Baghdadi's wives
that eventually led to his secret compound.
Yes, it's official.
The leader of ISIS is dead.
And you heard what they said.
They found him by interrogating his courier, which is a great reminder to always tip
your delivery guy, people.
Yeah, 20% for good service.
30% if you're a terrorist who's trying to hide your location
Now over the past couple of days We've started learning the details of this raid and to be honest
It sounds like something straight out of a movie
The secret operation beginning at 5 p.m. Saturday night eight Chinook helicopters took off from a Kurdish-controlled area in a rock
Flying low and fast taking on gunfire and returning
the fire before landing in northern Syria.
Once on the ground, the commandos blowing a hole through Baghdadi's hideout.
The front door had been booby-trapped.
You know, you think you go through the door.
If you're a normal person, you say, knock, knock, may I come in. The fact is that they blasted their way into the house, the house, the house, the house, the house, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, and, and, and, and, and, and, their, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, their, and, their, and, and, and, and, their, and, their, and, and, their, their, and, and, their, and, their, their, and, and, the blasted their way into the house in a very heavy wall,
and it took them literally seconds.
Yes, yes.
Instead of knocking on the door and asking ISIS if they could come in,
the special forces instead chose to blow a hole through the wall,
which must have been traumatizing for Trump to watch.
He was just sitting there like, no, why did you damage that beautiful wall?
That wall didn't do anything to anybody.
Why would you do that?
Now Mexicans are going to pour into Albert Daly's house and take all ICE's jobs.
You know, you know, honestly, the one cool thing about Donald Trump is that unlike other
presidents, he's never trying to communicate the gravity of this moment and keep the details
to a minimum.
No, he sounds like a dude on the local news who just saw some shit.
They blasted their way in and then all hell broke loose.
He died after running into a dead-end tunnel, whimpering and crying and screaming all the
way.
He died like a dog.
He died like a coward.
He reached the end of the tunnel as our dogs chased him down.
He ignited his vest, killing himself.
Nobody was even hurt.
Our canine, as they call, I call it a dog.
A beautiful dog, a talented dog.
Was injured and brought back.
Yes, yes, I call it a dog.
So Baghdadi died like a dog, but a dog is also the hero.
Some very mixed messages about dogs in this story.
More importantly though, it's weird that El Baghdadi tried to escape through a dead-end tunnel. Does nobody else find
that weird? Why does a terrorist compound have a dead-end tunnel? And also
isn't a dead-end just a cave? What is that? Like who made this tunnel? Was it built by the same people who run the New York subway? Is that what it was? Back? B? B? B. thibicicicicbibibibibibibibibibibibibibibibibibibibibibibibibibibibibibibibibibibibib-like? thi? thi? thi? thi? thi? thi? thi? thi? thi? thi? thi? thi? thi? thi? thi? thi? thi thi thi th is th th is th is th is thi thi thi thi thi thi thi. thi. th. th. th. th. th is is th. th. thi? thi? thi? thi? thi? thi? thi? thi? Is thi? thi? thi? Is thi? Is thi. Is thi. thi. Is thi. teeeeeeeeeeeeaaa. teea. tea. teea. thaea. than't than't t't end, you said the tunnel would be finished by now. He's like, look, buddy, there's a lot of things that are supposed to happen in life,
all right? My wife was supposed to be a double-d.
Turns out I'm gay and my husband and I live in our truth.
What do you want to do, buddy? Now whether you like Trump or not, you have to admit that this is a big a big a big a big a big big thi thi the only person who can turn a unifying occasion
into a dick-measuring contest.
This is the biggest there is.
This is the worst ever.
Osama Bin Laden was very big,
but Osama Bin Laden became big with the World Trade Center.
This is a man who built a whole, as he would like to call it a country, a caliphate,
and was trying to do it again.
What are you doing?
You don't have to pretend this guy is a bigger get than Bin Laden.
First of all, it's childish.
Secondly, he's not.
Bin Laden changed the entire world forever.
It's 18 years off the 9-11, and I still can't take four ounces of lotion onto an airplane.
I go on vacation and my skin thiiiiiiiiiiiiii. 18 years off the 9-11 and I still can't take four ounces of lotion onto an airplane.
I go on vacation and my skin is dry as f- That's how bad a terrorist bin Laden was.
We all ashy in these streets because of bin Laden.
All these guys are bad. You don't have to weigh them out?
But once again, Trump has managed to turn a non-partisan American victory
into another political fight. Who deserves more credit? Is it Trump or Obama?
Do presidents even deserve any credit for military victories?
The whole conversation is ridiculous.
Because we all know who rarely made this thing happen.
It was that canine.
Or, as I call it, a dog.
We'll be right back.
We'll be right back.
Hey, everybody, John Stewart here.
I am here to tell you about my new podcast, The Weekly Show, coming out every Thursday.
We're going to be talking about the election, earnings calls.
What are they talking about on these earnings calls?
We're going to be talking about ingredient to bread ratio on sandwiches.
I know you have a lot of options as far as podcasts go, but how many of them come out
on Thursday?
Listen to the weekly show with John Stewart, wherever you get your podcast.
Welcome back to the Daily Show. My first guest is a former three-term congressman from Texas who is running for president of the United States.
Please welcome, Beto or Rock.
Thank you. Thank you. Welcome for the show. Thank you. Huge honor to be with you. Before we start, I have to acknowledge that you have developed quite a reputation for having a potty mouth on the trail. People have said, Betto tells it like it is and he curses. So every time you curse, I'm gonna... I'm just warning you, Betto you're the the the the truth. I'm gonna. I. I. I. I the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their. I'm their. I'm their. I'm their. I'm to to to to their to to their their to their to to to their to the to to to to to to to to to to to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be their. Thank. I to be their. I their. I their. I their. I their. I their their. I their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their. I their their their their their their their their their their thety mouth on the trail. People have said, Betel tells it like it is, and he curses.
So every time you curse, I'm gonna, I'm just warning you,
Beto, I'm ready, I'm ready.
Yeah.
But let's talk about the road for a little bit.
You've been on the campaign trail, and although thought it would be? America is a lot bigger than Texas.
So a lot more counties, a lot more ground to cover, a lot more people to meet.
But the basics of an election or a campaign or democracy are the same.
You're there to meet people, to introduce yourself.
And if you're doing it right, you're listening to them as well, and you're reflecting back their stories, their experiences, and hopefully bringing new people into the experience.
When we first ran in Texas, our state ranked 50th in voter turnout, not because we love our
democracy any less than anyone else, but literally we were drawn that way.
Based on the color of your skin or your ethnicity, you may be drawn out of a congressional district to diminish the power of your vote, this, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, the racial, the racial, th, the racial, th, their, th, their, their, their, their, their, thii, and their, and tho, and, and, and, and, and thi, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, so.e.s.s.s.s. their, so, so, so,a. they. they. they. they. their, so, so, so, their, so, so, and, so, and, and, and, and, and, out of a congressional district to diminish the power of your vote, this racial gerrymandering that we had. So we
went to every single one of the 254 counties to bring everyone in and we
had the highest level of voter turnout in a midterm election 2018. That's what
we need to do this year against Donald Trump. Right, you definitely did
that but but you know there's no denying that thi.. T the the race the race the race the race the race. the race. the the the the the the the the the the the thrown. the thrown. thrown. thrown. thrown. thrown. thrown. thrown. thrown. thrown. thrown. thi. th. toe. tooe. too. too. too. too. toe. toe. to be. to be. to be. to be. to be. to be. to be. to be. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So, to. So, toe. So, toe. So, toe. So, to. So, to. And, to. And, to. And, to. And, to. And, t. And, te. And, te. And, te. And, te. And, te. And, te. And, te. And, to. And, to. And, t this race hasn't turned out maybe the way you would have intended because everyone knew the name Beirok because you blew up in the race
against Ted Cruz. You know, you had people rallying for you even from outside of the state.
I mean, you had Beyonce give you an endorsement. That's Biance. I mean, you won the race there. I don't know why you're still in politics. I would just wear a t-ssss, t. t. t. t. t. the t. the the the t. I'm the the the the the the the the the the th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm the race. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I's th. I'm the the race. I'm the race. I'm the race. I'm the race. I'm the race. I'm the race. I'm the race. I's. I's. I's. I'm the race. I's. I's. I's. I's. I'm the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm the. I'm the. I'm the. the. the. the. th. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. t-shirt that says, Beyonce chose me. Um, yeah.
But, but the presidential race seems to be different.
It seems to be in and around like preconceived notions of leadership
or what people think they know about you.
Are you where you hoped to be in the presidential race?
Look, I would love to be doing a lot better.
That's for sure. But I thu thu thu thu thu thu thu that that's thu that's thu thu thu thu, thu, thu, thu, thus thus thus, thus, thi thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, the the the thi, the the the the their their their their their their their their their their their their their thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi. I thi. thean. I thean. to thean. tooan. thean. thean. thean. thean. thean. thean. thean. thean.. But I got to tell you, I am so grateful for the extraordinary supporters and volunteers, some of whom I see here right now to
travel all the way to New York to be here. I wish that enthusiasm and dedication was
reflected in the polls. To answer your question, I don't think the polling reflects
the passion and the commitment and the resolve of our supporters from all over the country. I really feel it. thi right right right right right right right right right right right right right right right right right right right right right right right right right right right right right right right right right right right right right right right right right right right right right right right right right right right right. to to to to to to to to th th th th th th th th th th th th the tho tho tho tho tho tho th th th th tho tho th th th tho tho th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th. right right right right right right right right right right right right right right right right right right right right right now right now right now right now right now right now right to to to to to to to to to to to to that that the that the the the the the think the polling reflects the passion and the commitment
and the resolve of our supporters from all over the country.
I really feel it.
But we're also in this extraordinary field of candidates.
Yes.
Right.
You have somewhere around to 20.
18 people running?
So that makes sense that it's going to be diluted.
When you are running for president, though, you're in an interesting position because you are running against all these Democrats,
but you're also running against the person
who is currently in office.
Today is a particularly interesting day
because Donald Trump has come out
and he's given the speech about the leader of ISIS being killed.
And because of the way he presented it,
the conversation has now sparked from that, people saying, he to try to th, and the they, and they, they, they, they, they, they, they, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th.. th. thi, thi, thi, thi, tho, tho, thoomorrow is a thi, tho, too, too, too, too, too, too, too, too, tho, tho, tho, tho, the the the the they.............................. Today, is is is is is is is is is, is a, is a, is a too. And, too. And, too. And, too. And, too. too. And, too. too. too. too. too. toda. toda. toda. Today, today, today, today is a too. Today,, he wants to take credit, or he says Obama shouldn't take credit previously,
and who's credit, credit, credit,
you tweeted out a congratulatory note,
you know, honoring the troops who are involved in this.
Do you think a commander-in-chief
should be taking credit for the achievements of the military,
and do you think that that's their place place place place place place place place place place place place place place place place place place place place place place place place place place.
Should they just be in a place of taking the blame and then moving on? I think it would make sense for the president to congratulate those service members and the
canine or dog as you're referred to it.
But also, you know, someone made the case, and it's very compelling to me, that this raid
was successful in spite of, or despite the president, not because of him, to turn his back on those Kurdish fighters whose intelligence and help their their their their their their their and help and help and help and help and help and help and help and help and help and help and help and help and help and help and help their their their their their their their their their their the despite the president, not because of him, to turn his back on
those Kurdish fighters whose intelligence and help located al-Baghadi in
the first place and made sure that we were successful. His precipitous
withdrawal that created a void that Turkey and Russia, Iran, and ISIS and Assad have
all come into. It is really a miracle that we were able to do this,
but is really owing to our allies, our friends,
our partners on the ground,
and those brave service members
who put their lives on the line
to ensure that there was justice for this country.
When you look at this situation as somebody,
who's auditioning to be the commander-in-chief,
do you think that Trump made the right move in pulling the troops out?
Because you've said previously that the unending wars cannot continue for America.
There needs to be a reason for what is happening.
Trump has said there is no reason now that ISIS is virtually defeated.
Do you agree with that or how would you have handled the situation differently? I don't because the
al-baqaddi raid is a great example. Because of those partnerships that we have on the ground,
we are successful. Without those partnerships, not only is our standing and our stature, but
our security is diminished in that area, as well as it is around the world. There are
are going to be fewer potential allies down the road after they've seen how we've treated the Kurds.
So at some point our military engagement in Syria and Iraq and Afghanistan and Yemen and Somalia and Libya and all these other countries has to end,
but it has to end predicated on a political solution or we will find U.S. service members back there again their lives on the line once more. If ISIS is the son of al-Qaeda, what have have have have have the the th, the th, the th, the th, the the the th. the the the the their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, thi, thi, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, their, and, and, their, and, their, their, their, their, thi. And, te, te, te.e. And, te, te, te, te, te, the.e, their, their, their, their, te, their lives on the line once more. If ISIS is the son of al-Qaeda, what have we done to prevent the next generation of al-Qaeda
or ISIS-like fighters in that region?
We need to be working on diplomatic, political solutions there.
That necessitates close working relationships with our friends, our allies, and even
being willing to sit across the table from those who do not see eye to eye with the United States. That's the only way to resolve these differences peacefully, nonviolently, diplomatically,
without using military force.
Speaking of solutions, let's move on to a list of solutions you drafted and proposed today
with regards to prison reform.
This is truly one of the biggest issues facing America today.
To have, you know, the population, the population, the population, the population the population the population a the the the of the biggest issues facing America today. To have the population of a small country imprisoned
is something that has been a black mark on America's record
for too long, excuse the pun.
You have a large prison population in a country
where it seems like the prison population
is not going to dwindle any time soon.
What do you think needs to change the obvious?
And how do you begin changing that? You've th th th to stop th th tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho thu. thu. thu. thu. thu. tho tho tho. tho. tho. thu. thi. thau. thau. thau. thau. thau. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. t. t. the. the. the. the. the. the. true. true. true. true. true. true. true. true. true. true. true. truly, truly, truly, truly, truly, truly, t you begin changing that? You've got to stop this flow that really begins in school,
and it doesn't begin in high school,
this schoolhouse to jailhouse pipeline that we all hear about.
It starts in kindergarten when a child is five years old.
In Texas, that child is five times as likely to be disciplined or suspended
or expelled if he or she is a child of color.
That kid is absolutely defenseless against the system
into which she was born.
So, making sure that we don't just have a quality
in terms of funding for our schools,
but equity in our schools,
the teachers should look like the students in front of them.
We're going to have much better outcomes if we do that.
Ending the profit incentive for the incarceration epidemic that we have right now, 2.3 million
behind bars more than on any other country on the planet, disproportionately comprised
of people of color, and there are for-profit prison companies who have a vested interest
in that continuing to be the case. So end for-profit prisons and cash bail in America,
you'll do a lot to address this issue. Why the cash bail?
Cash bail basically says that some people are going to be too poor poor too too too too too to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to address this issue. Why the cash bail? Cash bail basically says that some people are going to be too poor for justice, that you
will languish in jail, awaiting a trial or the ability to even see your attorney in the
first place, while others who have the means to do so are able to get out.
If we complement that with an end to the war on drugs, which has really become a war on people more than others, some others others, th others, some th others, some th others, some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some th, some th, some tho, some tho, some tho, some tho, some tho, some tho, some tho, tho, to bea, tho, to bea, to bea, to bea, to bea, to bea, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, thiia, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, thia, and, and, and, and, and, thia, thia, thia, and, thi.a, thi.s.s, thia, tea.s.s, tea, thea,a, thea,a,a, thea, thea, thea, and, a war on some people more than others. Some have called it the new Jim Crow because though white Americans and black
Americans will use marijuana at the same rate, black Americans are far more likely to be stopped
and frisked and arrested and incarcerated. And upon release to bear the consequences of that,
check in a box on every employment application form, meaning it's less likely that you get the job, unable to pursue higher education or get a small the the the the the the the the the the the the the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new.... the the the the the new. their. their. their. their. th. th. th. th. the. the. the. the. thea. thea. they. they. they. they. they. they. their. their. it's less likely that you get the job, unable to pursue higher education or get a small business loan.
So, not only ending that war on drugs,
legalizing marijuana,
but expunging the arrest records for those who've served time,
and then making sure that those who were arrested for selling weed,
typically black or brown,
are first in line to have the licenses to legally marijuana once it's become legal in this country. Transformative justice.
The one thing about you that has been consistent is that your policies have resonated
with multitudes of people. The democratic race though has not been kind to you, partly due to the fact that it is overcrowded and there are, you know, the
bigger names who seem to be taking up most of the votes.
Some have said, Biddle Ork, why don't you help on the ground, why don't you help the Democrats
win the war that they're trying to fight in this thing against Donald Trump and go, we're going to win the Senate, because if a Democratic president president to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be the the the the the. And the. the. the. the. thin. their. their their. their. their their their their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. And their. And their. And their. And their. And their. And their. And their. And their. And their. And their. And their. And their. And their. And their. And their. their. their. their their the. thin. thin. te. te. teck. And teck. And teck. And te. And te. And te. And try. And try. And try. And try. And thee. And th. the Senate race. Because if a Democratic president comes in but they don't have the Senate,
then all of this is going to be hampered at best.
How do you respond to those people who say better,
just focus on the Senate and you've done better in Texas
than any Democrat in the last quarter century.
How do you respond to those people when they say that to you. I tell them that I want to be the president that this country needs that we are so sorely
lacking right now.
A president who heals instead of in flames, who brings us together instead of further dividing
us, who operates on ambition and aspiration instead of fear.
And I want to be the nominee of this party who can win Texas and it's 38 electoral college votes. That state, more than any other,
could put Donald Trump away now and forever.
And we know that this guy,
if there is the slightest question about the outcome of that election,
he will exploit it to his full advantage.
Texas, those 38 electoral
college votes, makes that victory incredibly clear to the American people and
then forever changes the electoral landscape in America. And in addition,
having me at the top of the ticket also helps the nominee for US Senate
against John Cornyn as well as down ballot races throughout the state of Texas.
So I think I can do...
Interesting. I can do more as the nominee and more as president than I can in any other position.
And that's why I'm pursuing that for this country.
Wow, that's a powerful position to take.
Yeah.
So good having you on the show.
Thank you.
Good luck for Iowa.
Thank you so much for being here. Better than a rock everybody. We'll be right back. John Stewart here. Unbelievably exciting. My new podcast, The Weekly Show. We're going to be
talking about the election, economics, ingredient to bread ratio on sandwiches.
Listen to the weekly show with John Stewart, wherever you get your podcast.
Welcome back to the Daily Show. My next guest is a legend of the big screen. She
can be seen in the new film Last Christmas. Please welcome Michelle Yo. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Oh, they're always like.
Are they always like, are you always like this?
Uh, are you always here?
The, I think the answer speaks for itself.
Welcome to the show.
Thank you.
Such an honor to have you here.
Let's talk about the new movie first, last Christmas.
It feels like it is a coming together of everybody's favorites from everything
into one movie.
Like, that's what it feels like.
It's like, Crazy Rich Asians, one of the biggest movies in the world that everyone fell
in love with.
And then you've got Game of Thrones, which everyone is just like, yeah, just put all our
best things together and we're going to be the dragon lady here?
And then we had so much fun.
Emilia is just wonderful to work with and I really, really enjoyed it.
It was a little daunting when Paul Fieg, and I love him for this.
He called me and he says,
I want you to play Santa.
And I'm in, Santa?
I know I championed for gender equality and all. says, I want you to play Santa. And I'm in Santa.
I know I champion for gender equality and all,
but really I'm going to put on the ho, ho,
red outfit and that.
I'm not quite so sure.
Then he goes, no, no, no, no.
Emma Thompson wrote an incredible script.
Emma Thompson.
Right.
I mean, Paul Feet, Emma Thompson Thompson, Amelia Clark, Henry Golding.
I was like, okay, I'm there.
But please explain what is the Santa?
And I've never ventured into a comedy.
I mean, I have crazy rich Asians, it's a romantic comedy, but I played the most serious role
there, right?
Yeah, very serious.
Right. But in this one, I actually get to be funny.
And I, is that a big departure for you?
Because like, I grew up watching your movies,
and I only knew you as an action star.
You know, that is the only way I knew you, like, you were,
it was like you, it was like you, it was like you, it was like, you, it was, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, that, that, that, that, that, th...... that, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, a, is, a, a, a... Is, is, a. Is, is, is, a. Is. Is. Is. Is. Is. Is. Is. Is. Is. Is. Is. Is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, Yo, and they're like, oh, yes, we know her from like, like, you know, like it's more like dramatic.
I was like, no, the action star,
they're like action star.
But a lot of people don't know this about you is,
you were a huge action star,
or like in Asia.
You're proud to be right. But then when I crossed over, one of the first movies I did was Tomorrow Never Die.
Of course, yes.
Right.
Yes.
And so we do appreciate that you've taken that effort to come and watch us.
So when you do come, I want to give you a surprise.
And I hope that last Christmas will be a fun surprise for you.
Let me ask you this then.
When you move into comedy, I mean, a lot of have said it's actually one of the most difficult disciplines
because being straight is being straight and then you know like fighting is fighting but
with comedy it's timing and it's rhythm. Yes. Was that difficult for you? I was terrified. I would have
rather beat down eight guys. Just bring them on. When Paul Fieg bless him, he says you can do it.
I said, you realize
I've never done comedy before. And he was just obsessed and relentless. He said, you have
to try and do this. And Emma Thompson actually wrote this character inspired by someone who's
very dear to her, which is her daughter-in-law, Bau, who is an immigrant from China.
Oh wow. Who's moved to England. And I think her story is also very much which is her daughter-in-law, who is an immigrant from China,
who's moved to England.
And I think her story is also very much about the immigrants who have come.
And with Santa or Bao, they came and they were determined to fit in.
So my character, Santa, when she worked at the pet shop,
she wanted to blend in, but not because she didn't want to be, she wasn't proud of who she was over ethnicity.
If you watch the way she dresses, it's got the Chinese elements in there,
but then like the flamboyant Western panace as well.
Right, right.
And she would call herself Kitty at the pet store or muffin at the bakery.
So as far as Amelia Clark was concerned,
your name is Santa.
And then I said, no, my name is the thrown.
She was like, whir, ruh, ruh.
I love that.
I think I'm going to call myself hostee from now on.
That's what I'm going to do.
Thank you so much for being on the show.
Congratulations. Comedy, lots and lots. Thank you for being here. Last Christmas. We'll be in theaters November 8th. Michelle Yo, everybody.
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This has been a Comedy Central Podcast. John Stewart here. Unbelievably exciting news.
My new podcast, The Weekly Show.
We're going to be talking about the election, economics, ingredient to bread ratio on
sandwiches.
Listen to the weekly show with John Stewart, wherever you get your podcast.