The Daily Show: Ears Edition - Waffles vs. Pancakes - Hold Up with Dulcé Sloan & Josh Johnson

Episode Date: September 23, 2022

What’s the best breakfast food: waffles or pancakes? Daily Show correspondent Dulcé Sloan and Daily Show writer Josh Johnson go head-to-head on appropriate toppings, which has the better texture, a...nd which is worse, a hotel waffle iron or a pancake conveyor belt? Hold Up with Dulcé Sloan and Josh Johnson is a new podcast from The Daily Show. Check out more episodes of Hold Up wherever you get your podcasts.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 You're listening to Comedy Central. Now, you're listening to Comedy Central. Now, you remember before the pandemic you can stand around a water cooler and talk to your coworkers? Well, we used to call it water cooler conversations, we used to call it water cooler conversations, even though there was never really a water cooler there. Anyway, two of my good friends, daily show correspondent, Dose Sloan, and Daily Show writer Josh Johnson, are known around the building for their water cooler conversations. And they turn it into a podcast.
Starting point is 00:00:35 This is your chance to hear these two people go back and forth the way we get to hear it all the time in the hallway. The podcast podcast podcast podcast podcast podcast podcast podcast podcast podcast podcast podcast podcast podcast podcast podcast podcast podcast podcast podcast podcast podcast podcast podcast podcast podcast podcast podcast podcast podcast podcast podcast podcast podcast. the podcast. the podcast. the podcast. the the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their their their their they. their the. The podcast is called Hold Up. Have a listen. I'm going to hold up. Hey everybody, welcome to Hold Up. It's a big show about not a lot. I'm going to do one of these every episode. I'm just going to find a way to describe it in a different way. I'm your co-host. Host, co-host. Whenever there's two, it does also make it a bit of a weird thing. But whenever you do the drops, you always say that you're the host. So. Yeah, yeah, but then that's just because you're not there. Oh. Yeah. But I'm your host, Josh Johnson, joined by my co-host. Wow, the downgrade. I'm a co-pilot situation, right? Like, because there are some days
Starting point is 00:01:29 you're going to be piloting. There's going to be days where you care very much about something that I'm just opposed, but I don't care as much. That's a pilot day for you. Okay. Okay. I hear you. What's your name? Tell the people. I am Dulce Sloan. Could have been Lazaria Sloan, but there was a very brave woman who did my birth certificate who really just had to put her foot down. I'll tell you that story later. But yeah, I'm Dulce Sloan. I'm here, I woke up and it is what it is, baby. You know, the Lord has blessed us to see another day to talk about the nonsense that we talk
Starting point is 00:02:10 about on this here podcast. So we're here, we're here on this audio format today, not to talk about anything big going on the world, not talking about climate change. We not talking about anything serious. We are diametrically opposed. We are budding heads. We can't seem to agree on WindowSeat versus ILC. Because you don't want to live right. I don't want to live right.
Starting point is 00:02:39 You're out here living in chaos. Okay, so, first of all, tell the people what side you're on. I am team window seat. Joshua, where do you land on this? I'm team aisle seat because we can at least both agree that no one, okay. In our Christian circle, mm-hmm, would want the middle seat. That is a life that is, that if you love the middle seat, I'll go ahead and say it. I don't care who it offends. I think you're living foul. You're living very foul. Also, I can say it's been a good minute since I've been in a situation on a plane where there even was a middle seat. Wow. Wow. Wow. That's that's one of those things that look. That's a blessing. Look at Jesus. But I would not tell everybody that all the time. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:03:33 Absolutely not. You know there's haters out here. You know that you can't let everyone know how the Lord blesses you. What I can tell you. What I can tell you is that first class seats are more affordable in certain situations than you think they would be. But like sometimes, like I've gotten like, yo, I'm gonna say how the Lord bless me one time. I got a lay down seat. I'm talking about flat, right? Yeah, JetBlue. Delta, okay.
Starting point is 00:04:08 New York to San Francisco. Our round trip. Mm-hmm. $658. Wow. I don't know how. I don't know who. I don't know what glitch happened on Delta on that good morning.
Starting point is 00:04:27 But I needed that seat because I got very sick. It's like 2019. Remember I got so sick I lost 20 pounds in a month? Like well, like actually in a week and I was just sick all month and came back to work and had to leave again? I was so sick the man next to me put the blanket on me. Like tuck me in. Then when we landed they didn't make they they they they they they they they they they they didn't they they didn't they didn't they they didn't they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they thed the the the the the the thated thate to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to th. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. theded thed thed thed thed thed thed thed thed thed. thed thed thed thed thed. thed thed thed thed the the the the the the. the the. the to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the. the the next to me put the blanket on me, like tuck me in. Then when we landed, they didn't make me put my seat up. They just let me land flat. And I promised you, I looked in the mirror one day and I was like, wait a minute.
Starting point is 00:04:55 Let me just see how much I'll wait. And in like, seven or ten days, I lost 20 pounds. And I called my home girl and told her after I started feeling better and she was like bitch come cough in my mouth what are you talking about 20 pounds of 10 days she's like listen I had a dude tell me lose a weight he said either by sickness or by fitness but we gonna get this weight ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha look I'll tell you right now, that that thing of not even being in the world of middle
Starting point is 00:05:31 seats is wild. Have you ever been on the JetBlue flight mint? I'm going to tell you what first class is very affordable. JetBlue mint. They don't do it on every flight. They don't do it on every flight. They don't do it on every flight. They don't do it every route. Yeah. But, Woof. Good food. Good food. Also, Delta, the disrespect. Delta does not offer a lay down seat from New York to San Diego. Just not at all. Delta is, okay. So sometimes I'm in Atlanta. And sometimes when I get to that airport, who I'm like, the. Yeah. I, I'm like. I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, the the the to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the their to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the route the route the route to the route the route the route the route the route the route the route to the route the route the route the route their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their route their route their route. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, but to their route to to to to to to to to to to to to to their route'm in Atlanta and sometimes when I get to that airport, I'm like, y'all really must be feeling yourselves because, because the fact that you close.
Starting point is 00:06:14 But, so do you have clear? Of course I have clear. If you're a person who travels, like, what I mean comics who travel a lot, who don't have clear a pre-check, and I'm like, you don't you don't have $80 to get free-check. This is my thing about pre-check is my thing about like that stuff. It's wild. This is proof. This is like you know American American flaws at their finest because everything that we do around pre-check is proof proof we really don't need to be doing this stuff at all because you mean that for an extra $80 I couldn't possibly be a terrorist? On a driver's license, they take all of your fingerprints. When I went to my pre-check interview, they took all my fingerprints and it asked me like a few questions. I was in the car longer than they interviewed me.
Starting point is 00:07:08 I will tell you right now that when they did all, I don't care if you're clear, pre-check anything, when they take all your fingerprints, will they do all this background check, whatever. That doesn't mean I'm not gonna be crazy. Like that's like that's something plenty crazy. Yeah, that's that's my this whole thing where I'm like, you did all this background stuff. Yeah, that just means a person hasn't done anything yet. But also, when you look at, this is the thing. I think they probably look into certain people more than they look at the other people. Like if I come walking in to get my pre-check, they're like, yeah. She ain't gonna do nothing. I'm not gonna, they know, like, when in a history of life, have you seen any black woman do any fucking thing? When I walked in there were like, bro, just get, just take her.
Starting point is 00:07:56 Yeah. I was, I was literally like I was done, I just went, that's it. I mean, I've only seen black women blow shit up as a manner of speech. Yes. Like I'm coming here. It's always in theory. Right. It's always like I'm hurting everybody's feel. I'm going to light this bitch up as in I'm taking shots at everybody in the room verbally. But it's like we're not doing terrorism. I'll tell you though. The the the just so that we're that we're just so that we. that we. that th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th. th. It's th. It's th th th th the th the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th th. It th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's to to to to to to to to. It's to. It's to. It's th. It's to. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's we're not doing terrorism. We're not. The, the, just, just so that we at any point in the podcast actually cover the topic, I want to hear, I want to hear your thoughts and feelings on the window seat and why you think it's superior. Okay, I will start with this because I know this is gonna be your point, right? So I'm gonna give you this. Oh, wait, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the start with this because I know this is going to be your point, right? So I'm going to give you this. Oh wait, okay, wow. Before you even say I already know your point. Okay, go ahead, go ahead. I know you're going to say.
Starting point is 00:08:57 Now, the only because, you know, usually I start with, it's kind of like, give me the bad news first. Mm-hmm. The only hiccup to a window seat. th is that you have to ask an adult to let you pee. Yeah. That is a doubt, but I can't tell you, there are a few airlines. Mm-hmm. First of all, if you're on Alaska Airlines flight, and you are sitting in that very first row, yeah. There's a tha seat seat seat seat seat seat the the the the tha tha thatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheat, th. th. th. that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, it's that, it's that. It's to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to th. th. that that that that that that that that that thi thi the thi thi thi the thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. to thi. to that th's enough space for you to get around the other person. If you're on Hawaiian air, the way their lay down seats are set up is there is more than
Starting point is 00:09:34 adequate space to get up and go to the restroom without even waking the other person up, or making them even have to sit up. Delta, on the other hand, puts you in fucking like, isolation tube cubbies. So, that's why if you ever, as I was asking you, if you've ever been on those Mint flights, the one where you're in the, where it's just you in the road? Just you, fire, yes. There's that, and I think Delta might do it, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, that, that, that, that, that, that, th. There's that and I think Delta might do it because you know the sums of some fights there's like first class and then there's business class.
Starting point is 00:10:07 Mm-hmm. If something, usually it's for a job because I'm not paying a much money. Be in the sky. Like I have my limits. I have my limits. And sometimes you're just like how many thoughts. Like there's sometimes it's just too much money, right? Yeah, yeah. But that's the only downfall of a window seat where you have to be like, you either have to coordinate it or like, you either have to ask the other person. Because that's why I got to a point where I will just fucking hibernate. I get on the
Starting point is 00:10:37 plane, I eat my food, and I am done so. And so I don't have to pee until I get off the plane. Yeah. It's only recently where I'm like, you know what, maybe I should pee. Because, because I can say something just being about a plane where I'm just like, I'm gonna, I'm out. I'm done so, I'm fucking hibernating. It's, yeah. Because I don't want to wake up the other person. Also, if you were the asshole that gets upset when the person in the window seats ask you to, fuck you. You cannot be upset when the person in the window seat is like, hey, I didn't go to the bathroom. Because I had a guy go, oh you're getting up. I was like, bro. Oh, I know the wildest thing there ever happened on the plane. I'm in the window seat. There is this man in the middle who is
Starting point is 00:11:27 translucent, right? What? He's very old white man. I don't know if he got any work done or whatever, but he looked like a fucking like one of those fish that lives in the parts of the ocean where like there's no light. So he had this crazy like clear you can see like all the veins in his face. It was nuts and th. Like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, the the the the the the, the, the, th. th. th. the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, no light. So he had this crazy, like clear, you can see like all the veins in his face. It was nuts, and then he had like this toupei that looked like it was just like kind of melted. And then there was a person that he was with, this other guy that was with him. I don't know if he was his, whoever, a friend, or whatever, a chaperone handler, I don't know. And so he's sitting in the row in front of us in the window. So I'm at the window, see through white man in the middle,
Starting point is 00:12:09 Asian guy on the end, right? Okay. So we're sitting there and he's just like doing too much, right? Okay. He's, he keeps hopping up to start talking to the person, his friend in the row in front of us. Okay. And he's like bumping in us as he's doing it. I'm like, okay. And then they come by and they give you like a little snack box or whatever. And then when he's done with his food, he puts his trash on the Asian dude's tray. So he's like, I'm done. And then he just moves his stuff. And me, thukukukukukukukukukukukukukuked. Like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, the the their. their, their, their, their their their. And he's like, their, their, their, their, their, their, their their their their their their their their, he's their, he's their, he's their. And he's their. And he's their. And he's their. And he's their. And he's their. And he's their. And he's their. their. their. their. their. th. He's th. th. th. And he's like, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. He's like, he's like, I'm done, and then he just moves his stuff. And me and an Asian dude look at each other like,
Starting point is 00:12:47 yeah, what the fuck? Yeah. So I had the window open to take off. Yeah. And then when we're getting ready to land, I left the window closed and he went to reach across me. He's like, canto open this window? And he's like, I want to see that.
Starting point is 00:13:08 I said, then you should have gotten a window seat. You won't be watching it today. He went to reach across me, I went, sir. He was ridiculous. Also, I've never seen a, this is only second time of my life where I've seen a tupet where the hair look melted. It was like part tupe part hair plugs. There was a lot going on with this man.
Starting point is 00:13:31 And so this person was a middle seat, right? Yes, acting fucking wild. So it's like, yeah, we've the window, your friend in switch seats with you, you knew that you were acting wild. So like that's the other thing about being in the window. If you're in a window seat on a three-seat or row, you have to acknowledge you might not asking two people to get up to pee, that's hard. So the secret is you wait till the person the person the person the person the person the person the person the person the person the person the person the person the person to the person to to the to the the the to the to the the to the to the to to to the to the to to the the the the the the to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to that you to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the tie. the the the the tie. the the tree. the the tie. the the the the the the the the the the till the person in the middle gets up to pee or the person on the aisle gets up to pee. Because that's what I do when I'm on
Starting point is 00:14:10 plans now, it's when the person on the aisle gets up to pee, then I'm like, okay, I'll get up there. Because I'm not interrupting you because you got up. I get you. So this is my thing. When I choose an aisle seat. th. When th. When I th. When I th. When I th. When I th. When I th. When I th. When I th. When I th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. thin. the. th. th. th th th th th th. th. th. th. th. th. th is is th. th is th is th is th is the th is th is th is th is th is th is th. th is th. th. th. th. th is my th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the the th. th. the th. the the th. th. the. the. the the. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the. the the. the., I'm thinking ahead. I'm planning, all right? I'm putting something together. I'm planning the entire experience. Because yeah, I'm going to have to get up sometimes when people need to pee. I understand that. But also, I got first access to the snacks.
Starting point is 00:14:43 I got first access to the safety. Lot of your window seats are dead. If things go awry on this flight. But you have first access, I hear you. But I've sat and I, that cart running into me over and it is, that cart bumping into me, people,, I don't like people bumping into me. It is the ban of my existence, like people bumping into me.
Starting point is 00:15:11 When you are in the aisle seat, there's a lot of people in your personal space. Okay. Someone's reaching over you to give one or two other people a tray of food. When they're asking somebody what they want to drink, now they're leaning over you, right, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, they're, their, their, they're, it is they're, it is their, it is their, it is their, it is, it is their, it is their, it is their, their, they're, they're, their, they're they're their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their thean, thean, thean, thean, thean, thean, thean, thean, thean, thean, thean, the is the is two other people a tray of food. When they're asking somebody what they want to drink, they're now they're leaning over you, right? To talk to one or two other people. You and the flight attendant
Starting point is 00:15:34 might as well be making out. For the amount of time, this person is about to be in your personal space, in a tube in a tube in the fucking sky, it's too much. That's why I don't do I'll see because it's an invasion of my personal space on a regular basis. Somebody going to the bat, like the number of times I've been good and sleep and somebody is just, the number, I bumped into plenty of people in an aisle seat. Just coming back and forth from their arm is on the arm rest, right? You are trying trying trying trying trying trying trying trying trying trying trying trying try try the the the the the the number the number to the number to th, th, th, to to to to to to to to to be to be too, to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, to, to, to, to, to, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I'm, I, I'm, I'm, I'm, th, thin, thin, thin, thin, tho, thooo.e, to.e.e.e.e.I'm, too, to, to, to, to, to, th. I'm, to, thin, their arm is on the arm rest right you are trying to avoid one arm boom you hit another arm it's like a fucking it's I'm pinballing my hips
Starting point is 00:16:09 down this fucking aisle and if your arm is out your legs too far it's like I'm too you're on the same page as we decide if window or aisle is better okay okay now when you and this is a different time in your life I understand but I'm asking you to go there yes when you in the past yeah had to be in a middle seat yes oh it wasn't often because the thing is middle seats only happen if you don't plan ahead. I know I was asking you to go to that place. I'm not saying you're going to go back. I feel like as soon as I brought it up, you were like don't put that evil on me.
Starting point is 00:16:57 Don't you put that evil on me Ricky Bobby. And so all I'm saying is do you subscribe whether you're in the window or aisle that the arm rests goes to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the middle... to to the middle. the middle. the middle. the middle. the middle. the middle. the middle. the middle. the middle. Don't the middle. the middle. Don't. Don't the middle. Don't the middle. Don't the middle. Don't the middle. Don't the middle. Don't the middle. Don't the middle. Don't the middle. Don't the middle. Don't the middle. Don't the middle. Don't the middle. Don't the middle. Don. Don. Don. Don. Don. Don. Don. Don. Don. Don. Don. Don. Don. Don. Don. Don. Don. Don. Don't. Don't. Don't. Don't. Don't. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the, whether you're in the window or aisle, that the armrest goes to the middle seat? I think the armrest goes to the middle seat because the aisle has an armrest. The window has the whole side of the plane. They have the majesty of flight, yes. They've got a window to look out of. You see what I'm saying? So I think? Yeah. Yeah, I th. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I the the the the the the the the the arm, the arm, the arm, the arm, the arm, the arm, the arm, the arm, the arm, the arm, the arm, the arm, the arm, the arm, the arm the arm the arm the arm the arm the arm the arm rest rest rest rest rest rest rest rest go rest, the arm rest rest rest rest rest, the arm rest rest rest rest rest rest rest rest rest rest rest rest rest rest rest rest rest the arm the arm the arm the arm the arm the arm the arm the arm the arm the arm the arm the arm the arm the arm the arm the arm the arm the arm the arm the arm the arm the arm the arm the arm, the arm, the the the th, th, the the rest, thea? thea? thea? thea' tha' thea' thea' thea' thea' thea' thea' thea' thea' thea' thea' the plane. They have the majesty of flight. Yes The majesty of flight. They've got a window to look out of you see what I'm saying? Yeah, yeah. So I think the armrests
Starting point is 00:17:31 Should go to the middle seat the middle seat. Okay. I have been in the elbow competition with someone When I was in a middle seat and I thought very disrespectful. I also have been on planes where, because you know when you start doing colleges, the planes get smaller, smaller like Russian stacking dolls. Yeah, yeah. So I've been on a plane, I can tell you, I was on a plane one time and there was this very like just muscular man. This is huge man. He sat down after I sat down and I just spent the whole flight just behind his shoulder. Like that's where I want, they just, this is where I live now. Yeah. Me and this man go together. Because there was nowhere, there was no a couple. For the next two hours, me and this man go together.
Starting point is 00:18:28 And he would ask me, and I was very much like the, you know, I'm good. I'm okay. They're like, because you can't do anything. See, yeah, yeah, yeah. But when it came to that arm rest, I let home boy have it. And I let Homeboy have it because I had his whole fucking shoulder. That's why I let him have it. If you are just out here just your body just on people. Yeah, yeah. We go together.
Starting point is 00:18:53 Like truly, until this plane lands, I am your wife. You didn't say it this way, but I can tell that this bad was good looking because just the way that youthis man was good looking because just the way that you because you were like no I'm good anytime anytime you get that quiet I know I know I know you're like feeling somebody anytime no no no it's all right it's okay no no no no but I'm fucking you know it's like a quiet and a little bit of shake to it to it to no I'm over I'm over I got fucking, fucking cat from Hepburn. But no, but I was, I bid on flights where I also, this man got so mad at me. I was in the window seat, he was in the aisle.
Starting point is 00:19:34 This is, I was on the, I was on a united flight and I was just like, oh, the middle class is dying. Because, first class was full, so there was three sections on this plane, right? There was first class, I guess it was a middle business class area and then there was economy, right? First class fucking jam-packed. Yeah. Fullest shit. There were 40 seats. Yeah. In the middle. That had five, six people in them.
Starting point is 00:20:09 And I was like, what the fuck is happening on this plane? They couldn't push any of them people from Economy up here? Because when you look back at Economy, I swa'eigh there were sirens. It was a fucking Greyhound bus back there. Somebody had a bird, like it was fucking wild back there. And there was curtains, and I was like, I've ever seen a curtain on the curtain, the curtain, the curtain, the curtain, the curtain, the curtain, the curtain, the curtain, the curtain, the curtain, the curtain, like a while back there and there was curtains and I was like I've ever seen a curtain on this part But this man sits down next to me He you didn't have a little brother so you don't know what the little brother for like
Starting point is 00:20:32 You know how teenage boys smell Where it's just that slight funk you are a teenage boy? There's a slight funk. There's a very specific funk to a teenage boy. Okay. That unless you had like a brother, you don't know what it is. And a 40-year-old man sat next to me smelling like a 13-year-old boy who just got out of the PE class. And he was doing, mind you, the plane had not left anywhere. Also, he came and sat down next to me, which I get it because there was a whole section fucking, you don't know where the the the the th th th th th th th th th th, you. th, you. You th, you. You th, you. You th, you. You th, you th, you th, you th, you th, you th, you th like like th, you th, you th, like, you thin, you th, you th, you th, you th, you th, you th, you th, you th, you th, you th, you th, you th, you th, you th, you th, you th, you th, you th, you th, you th, you th, you th, you th, you th, you th. th, you th. th. You th. You th. You th. You th. th. th. thin, you thin, you don't thin, thin, like like like thin, like thin, like like thin, like thin, like like thin, like like thin, like like, like, like, thin, th like, thin, you th like, you th like, you th you, the plane had not left anywhere. Also, he came and sat down next to me, which I get it because there was a whole section fucking, you don't know where these people are, right? We're in the beginning of the board and groups.
Starting point is 00:21:12 You don't know those people don't fill up the plane. He sits down, immediately man spreads, arms out, so now we're going for the fucking junking. He got the fukeke, fucking, fucking, fucking, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, the the, th. the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the the, the the thu, the thu, thu, the thu, the thu, thu, thu.a, they.a, the they.a, the the the the the thu.a, the the the the the that. He got to let the funk completely fucking obnoxious, right? Bumping in, knocking my arm off the armrest. I was like, oh, this is what we're doing? Bitch, let me explain something to you. I started doing the exact same thing. I'm spreading my arms out, getting my chest wide, sir.
Starting point is 00:21:44 I need space, right? Getting my chest wide. I'm man spreading. Pushing his arm off the armrest. Bitch you want to go, let's go, right? The plane has not taken off yet. Yeah. He goes and complains to the flight attendant. Yeah. And then she looked at me and then looked at him, and I just saw her go, get another seat. the the the the the the the the the the the they. they. they. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thin. I's. I's. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. I's th. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. the the the thin. S. I'm. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. yeah. And then she looked at me and then looked at him and I just saw her go, get another seat. Just sit somewhere else. Yeah. And then afterwards she was like, what the hell? I was like, I don't know. It was the wildest thing to me.
Starting point is 00:22:14 I've had dudes in middle seats go to manspread. Mm-hmm. But he's, there's me on one side and the the other, thoom, thoom, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, th, the, th, the, the, the, th, th, th, th, th, th, th. I, th. I, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, just, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi. So, thi. So, just, thi. to to toooooooooooooooo. So, just, just, just, just, thi, just, just the other side. So now they're just trying to man spread on the right. I'm like you can't just man spread on the right. That's not how this works. You spread and you spread. No. So you go to spread. I'm spreading now. Like we all, bitch we're cream cheese out here. Everybody getting spread. We're peanut butter. But fucking country crock. I don't care. Everybody get spread, right. So there's th, th, th, th, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their. their. their. their. their. their. their. I, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just. the right. the right. the right. the right. the right. the right. the right. the right. the right. the right. the right. the right. the right. the right. their, just, just. their, just. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. th. th. th. their. th. their. th. the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. there's that thing, you're in the middle seat, keep your fuck. We're giving you the armrest, but act right. Also, we're already, this is already the least amount of space that a human being in. This is already the least amount of space that a human being in.
Starting point is 00:22:57 They have calculated it. They've made sure what's the most reasonable amount of space to put a human being in and them not start a fucking riot. Yeah, yeah, because yeah, exactly, exactly. What's the smallest amount of space we can put these people in before they kill each other? I guess my thing is I've been in the middle seat before and this is, I actually think I'm doing... Wow. Wow. How dare you? But you have though. How in the absolute of dare-devilness, do you?
Starting point is 00:23:29 But you have, though? How in the absolute... Of daredevilness, do you? How very dare you? Is that what you're trying to say? How very dare you? I already asked it the way I asked it. Don't even re-ask me. What I was asking you. I'm saying, yeah, I have had a middle-sieve lifestyle before, okay? And I do this thing, I actually think it's courteous. I don't know if people like it or not. I only had it go awry maybe twice. I'm a pretty nimble dude and sometimes the person in the aisle seat is pretty little, right? So rather than wake them up, sometimes I'll just stand up in my seat, I'll put a foot on my seat, and I'll step over them. I'll just like step right. I don't even wake them up. I just step over them into the aisle and I go about my way, use the bathroom, come back,
Starting point is 00:24:27 step over them again, and then sit down, and they don't even wake up. So you either put your ass or your crotch in a person's first? They've only woken up twice. Now both times where the person was waking up, it was your ass or your crotch in their face in face in face in their face in they face in they face in they face in they face in they face in they they they they the person was waking up mid step over. It was your ass or your crotch in their face. And they did they did have quite a reaction but as soon. Wait a minute you let me tell all these wild ass stories and you did not tell me that you were a sneak putting your man parts and people faces and you were making people wake up from dreamland why they 35,000 feet in the fucking sky to your whole little ass in their whole face and they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they 35,000 feet in the fucking sky to your whole little ass. And they whole face and they American face?
Starting point is 00:25:08 I'm saying that it's gone well enough times that to me to wake them up felt ruder than just stepping over. You thought it was rudder to wake them up than to put your ass in somebody's face? You don't know how hard it is for some people to fall asleep? I don't know these people. But what if like the person in front of them, if the seat is reclined? Mm-hmm.
Starting point is 00:25:32 You've already got a seat. Also, can we say that I don't think every seat reclines the same? Because I've been on some planes, you're crying. were crying and it's just two just a slight two inches and then other seats where I'm just like I can see this man's forehead. Yeah some he's too far back. Some reclined so much that you know they're broken yes. Right I'm just like when I got to recline and the person behind me got like when you see that domino effect the sleeves reclining because it's like you didn't recline because you the the the they the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. It's the the they. It's th. It's the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th is is is is is is is. is. is. is. th. th. th. th. th. I. I's th. th. th. the. the. the. the. theeeeeeeeeeeat. theeeeeeat. theeeeeeeeat. th. theeeee. the is just like, ugh, and then it's ugh, then it's ugh, 40 times, 50 times behind you. I'm with you, I'm just saying I've done that because in my mind,
Starting point is 00:26:10 it was easier for me. I didn't mind the step over. Easier for you, not, you wouldn't think about the trauma. No, no, plane, I don't take it lightly. I don't just assume they can fall right back to sleep. But they also have to stay awake. They have to stay awake until I get back. Or else I'm just waking.
Starting point is 00:26:35 One time I did, this is wild. I can't believe this person was clearly living a very fast lifestyle because I was in the middle seat, they were in the aisle, I had to wake them up to get them up to get out and then when I came back I was only I only went to pee when I came back they were they were thi their mouth was open everything. Oh yeah I had to get them up again and I was like let me just if I had just stepped over this person they clearly wouldn't have caught it because th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th to to to to took to to to to to thi to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to their their their their their their their their their their. their. their their their. their. their their their their. their their their their their their their their their their their their their the. the. te. te. te. te. tea. today tooe. te. today toe. toe. toe. I the. I the. I the. I to get them up again. I was like, let me just, if I had just stepped over this person, they clearly wouldn't have caught it because it took a couple shakes to wake him up again. You know?
Starting point is 00:27:10 I was on a plane before and the pilot comes on and goes, also I love the pilot, I love a good pilot voice. Yeah, there's some great pilot voices out there that put you at ease. There are some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some the the the the th, th, th, thi thi thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, I thi, I thi, I thi, I'm thi, I'm tho, I'm, I'm, I'm thi, I'm, I'm, I'll, I'll, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I. to, I. to, I. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi, thi, thi, the the the the thin, to thin, to to to to th. to to too, too, too, too, too, too, too, too, too, too, too, too, that put you on edge. Right. Yeah, anytime you hear, like, I'll tell you right now, if I hear a pilot voice that sound too familiar to me, I'm already nervous. What do you mean too familiar? Like if the pilot sounds too laid-back, it does it just doesn't seem professional to me. I had a pilot on a flight one time get, get ready to get on the mic., like, like, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the, the, the, I the, I the, I the, I'll, I I, I, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll they, I'll they, I'll they, I'll, I'll, I'll, I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I, I, I I I I I I I I, I I, I, I I I, I I, I, I I, I, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, I, if, I'll, I'll, I'll, if, I'll, the, the, the the the toe, tell, tell, tell, a flight one time, get ready to get on the mic. So he had an announcement to make, but he clicked it on too early
Starting point is 00:27:51 and we all heard him burp, and that doesn't sound like somebody who can fly. Because the man burp, Josh? Because, okay, tell me, okay, so I understand that you live a different life where you're brave and you and you and you and you and you and you and you, and you, and you, and you, and th.... And th. I th. I th. I th. I'm just just just just just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm not, I'm just, I'm just, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. that, th. that, that, that, that, that, to to that, toa. that, toa. toe toean, toean, to. to. th different life where you're brave and you enjoy things and so I'm just saying. I'm not that brave. I'm still black. I'm saying if I'm on a flight and I hear the pilot get all, ugh.
Starting point is 00:28:16 So we're going to be flying today over and like, no, no, it just makes me feel like that the cockpit is sticky. No, no, no, this makes me feel like that the cockpit is sticky. No, no, no. This makes me have no confidence. If you burp before you start talking and like this is supposed to be professional, it just makes me, I'm not saying that I'm brave, I'm just like, there's just certain things I can't be afraid of, right? Because it's like there's a lot of things that, you know, black people don't do. That's why we have a whole piece on the show called, uh, we don't do that, because we don't do a lot of shit. Um, but if I hear him burp when he comes on, first of all, just
Starting point is 00:28:52 makes me think he's a disgusting human being. Um, because we're talking about a hard burp too. We're not talking about a little gulp. We're talking about he- Like a big, like, like, like, their, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, th. th. th. th. Like, th. Like, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. Like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, a big like beer like Homer Simpson like man burp like maybe he just finished lunch I've never I don't remember sir you know it was coming you've never been tricked by a but like people like I've had like you've never been tricked by a burp but it's like it's it just makes you feel like the cockpit is sticky I don't know how it doesn't say anything about his ability to land this plane it just makes me feel like the cockpit is sticky the altimeter might be you know I might have like food like a food wrapper's it gives me car energy that's what it is it's like that makes me feel like I'm open like there's some cans on the floor right because it's like I'll have stuff in my car like
Starting point is 00:29:42 every many people's car to just like completely filthy because it's like, I'll have stuff in my car. Like, every many people's cars are just like completely filthy, and I'm like, just move that stuff. And I'm like, you shouldn't even ask me to get in here. My shoes are gonna get dirty getting in this car. And I don't respect this at all. Like, it's ridiculous. I have a stand this is your pilot, like that voice? I love that. It almost puts you in the mind of like your, like the newscaster voice. Hi, this is like that one or like the disc jockey voice, like the very specific like record,
Starting point is 00:30:12 but I did have a pilot say that like, he called the plane like the Star Trek Enterprise, which made some people grown, but I thought it was so adorable. and then he was th th th th th th th th th th th th thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi, that that that that that that that that that that, that, that, that, that, that, like, that, like, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. This, th. This, th. This, th. This, th. This, th. This, th. This, th. This, th. This, th. This, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi. This is thi. This is thi. This is thi. This is thi. thi. thi. thi. This is like, thi. This is like, thi. it was so adorable. And then he was talking about how we were going to be flying at like 70% the speed of sound. And I just went, I didn't fucking need that. Did you know you're going fast? Yeah, going very fast. I mean, I had a pilot one time that was hitting us with too many umms. And I was like, do you, are you sure? I did not really. I, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, th, th, th, th, th, th th th th th th th th th th th th th th thi, uh, uh, uh, we, uh, we're going, we're going, we're going, uh, uh, we're going, uh, we're going, we're going, we're going, we're going, we're going, we're going, we're going, we're going, we're going, we're going, we're going, we're going, we're going, we're going, we're going, we're going, we're going, we're going, we're going, we're going, we're going, we're going, we're going, th th th th th th th th th th th th th th thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi. We're going, to to to to to thi-a' thi-a' thi- you are you sure? Josh I did not really. You acted like you're not sure where we're going you're not sure how high we're getting that man was hitting us with multiple
Starting point is 00:30:55 ums in every sentence. So we're welcome to the uh yeah yeah it sounded like it's not like he was supposed to be I understand that that's a nervous take that people have but you have to the, yeah. It sounded like, it sounded like he wasn't supposed to be. I understand that that's a nervous take that people have, but you have to understand when you're on a plane and he, this is the boss of the plane. So if you're nervous, we're nervous. Okay? Like if you get if you get on the mic in your plane and you're like, welcome to a delta, it's like that doesn't even sound like you supposed to be flied tod........ to. to. to. to. to. to. to. I, to. I, to. I, to. I, to. I, to. I, to to to to to the the the the the the the the the the that. I that. I that. I that. I that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that people, that people, that people, that people, that people, that people, that people, that people, that people, that people, that people, that people. that people, that people. that people. that people. that people. that people. that people. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. I, that. I, that. I, the that the that that the that that that that that that that that that that that that that's, that that that that that's, that that that that that that that that that that to a Delta it's like that doesn't even sound like you supposed to be flied today I hear you I think what's even more upsetting is what they make the announcement and you can't understand what they're saying at all yeah because that means that if it's an emergency you don't know what the fuck is here yeah so it's like you hear you hear ladies and gentlemen, right? Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. It's welcome, ladies and gentlemen to fly.
Starting point is 00:31:49 I'm saying, oh, I'm saying. I know that 83 degrees. Yeah, I'm like, no, no, no. I have to hear what he's saying. I know this has nothing to do with the seats, but I hate when they tell me the temperature it's going to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be the to be the to be to be the to be the to be the to be to be the to hear what he's saying. I know this has nothing to do with the seats, but I hate when they tell me the temperature it's gonna be because I already packed. Like, that's so funny. There's nothing I can do now. So when you're like, you're like, we're gonna be flying into San Francisco. It's actually gonna be a chilly 65 today. I'm like, all right, well, then I've then a mistake. But also, you should check the weather before you pack. If you didn't check the weather before you pack the show. Sure, sure.
Starting point is 00:32:28 I'm not blaming him. I'm just saying I hate what it happens because there's nothing I can do about it, you know? I don't think I knew how judgmental you were, Joshua. Over very specific things when it comes to pilots pilots pilots pilots pilots pilots pilots pilots a plant, because I don't have a fear of flying, but I could grow one, I could grow one real easy. And when someone gets on the mic and they're just over here um in and on,
Starting point is 00:32:54 it sounds like they're stealing this plate, is what it sounds like. I understand the place and the beauty of a window seat. I'm not going to completely undercut your point. I'm just saying, depends on when you're flying if the window seat's even useful. Because if you're flying in a red eye, if you're flying where you're going to be night very soon, that window seat is about to be nil and void. It's just going to be dark. Absolutely not.
Starting point is 00:33:25 If you're flying, be dark. No, if you're flying over land, okay, the window seat is not useless. Because you're going to see cities, a light, a lit up at night, okay? The very interesting, like flying into a city at night, it's like, especially if you're flying like into LA at night, it's like desert, desert, desert, like it's weird, you see the line. Yeah, desert, desert, desert, desert, traffic. Right, and so it's so funny because like you see the line.
Starting point is 00:33:58 Yeah, like we just went, the lights are gonna stop here, here, the lights are gonna, right. Right, we're not putting no they. they. they. they. they. they. the light, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, the.. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the lights are gonna right we're not putting no more truck no if you don't live right here you get no stores right so you can see a lot now if you're that I flown to Melbourne so I did a 14 hour flight when I wanted to do the Melbourne Melbourne what was it? Yeah comedy festival I'm want to say Frank yeah well comedy festival it was I went from New York to to LA which was five hours mm and then LA to Melbourne the to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the to to the the to the to the to the to the to to the the to the to the to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the to to the to to to to the to to to their. they. they. they. they. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the Festival. It was, I went from New York to LA, which was five hours. And then LA to Melbourne, which was 14 hours. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:34:32 In a window seat. Okay. But to your point, it was over water. The flight was at 9 p.m. I landed at 5 a.m. Completely lost Saturday. Yeah. Left on a Friday, landed on a Sunday, gone. But when I came back, it was Tuesday for 36 hours. But anyway, plane takes off. The entertainment on the plane is not working. Oof. The Wi-Fi is not working. The TV is not working. And then, then, then to make matters worse, the overhead light
Starting point is 00:35:10 was connected to the entertainment. So you couldn't just reach up and turn the light on. So even if you brought a fucking book, when they were rebooting and rebooting, you couldn't turn the overhead light on. Then, even if you had something you could watch on an iPad or a tablet or something, because they kept rebooting it, the power was surging so you couldn't even charge your fucking phone. 14 hours. At night. No TV.
Starting point is 00:35:43 No Wi-Fi. No over- They fed us and cut all the fucking lights off. They're like go to bed. Good day. I'll tell you right now. I'll tell you right now then. That thing, what you described is a caveat where yes, if you're in the window seat at night and you're passing over land, great. Good on you. You see some dots on the ground. You see some dots in the sky. But if you are going the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. their. the their. th. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. the f. the f. the f. the f. the f. the f. the f. the f. the f. I. the f. I. I. the f. the. I. I. I. the. I. I. the. I. the. I. I. I. the. I. I. the. I. I. I. the. the. the. th. th. th. th. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. the. the. the. the. the ground, you see some dots in the sky. But if you were going over water, you might as well be staring at an iPhone that is off. But the good part for me is that the moon was on my side of the plane. So I was watching the world's first movie, which was the moon on water. Was what all I had to watch until my battery on my phone got low and I had to wait until I was able to fucking charge it eventually.
Starting point is 00:36:31 But people sitting on the other side of the plane was no moon. Torqueness. Torqueness had nothing. And eventually they ended up giving people like $250 vouchers just a stack of them like fucking test paper like a teacher with test papers and we're just like here here here here don't fuck we don't want to hear it here here here here I think what has happened here is that we have not determined which one is good or bad no we really have it at all so we're just got to throw this one to you the listener this is probably the most off-topic around-about episode that we've had. We talked about planes the entire time.
Starting point is 00:37:08 We definitely talked about airports and planes. We talked about everything that encompasses being on a plane, all the whole plane experience, right? Yeah, yeah. Because going through the non, because think about it, it's hectic getting to the airport. Then it's hectic getting on on on on on on on on on on on on the the fucking on the fucking on the fucking on the fucking on the fucking on the fucking on the fucking on the fucking on the fucking on the fucking on the fucking on the fucking on the fucking on the fucking on the fucking on the fucking on the non because think about it it's hectic getting to the airport then it's hectic getting through the airport then it's hectic getting on the fucking plane and then I'm gonna spend the whole flight getting bumped into fuck that I pick a window seat because I've already been through the fucking gauntlet of nonsense that is being in an airport but what you have to have you ever look at the website seat guru dot com no. th okay okay okay okay okay okay okay okay okay okay okay okay okay okay okay okay okay okay okay okay okay okay okay okay okay okay okay okay okay okay okay okay okay okay okay okay okay okay okay okay okay okay okay okay okay okay okay okay okay okay okay okay okay okay okay okay okay okay okay okay okay okay okay okay okay okay okay th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th. th. th. th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th i th th i th i th i th i th i th i th i th i th i th i th i th i th i th i th. th. th. that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that to, have you ever looked at the website, seatgooro.com?
Starting point is 00:37:47 No. Okay, my the bane of my existence is getting to the window seat and you end up where the seam is, right? So you don't have the window, you're in that part in between the windows. And one time it kept happening to me to the point that the last time it happened to me I was just in tears. I was so mad. Because you can't, because one, there's no window. Two, you can't lean over good.
Starting point is 00:38:11 You're just stuck. I was so angry I was crying. I was stressed the fuck out. I'd been on a million fucking flights. I just wanted to go lean and then it's just the fucking seam of this plane. And sometimes the way they set up first class seats, like I've been on planes where like every seat you're not really at, the window is in front of you, but at your head is the
Starting point is 00:38:39 fucking seam. So I don't know if they do that so other people can look out the window that I paid for. But back, either slide these seats forward or back these windows up because I've paid for a fucking window seat. I need to be able to look out this damn window and don't give me the scene. So there's a website, seat guru. And that's where I go where I'm, I literally, if I'm looking at a flight I'll go okay where is Because sometimes you just pick a fucking seat you don't know there's a bulkhead here there's a scene of a plane here some of them I've had it where like they're
Starting point is 00:39:13 like oh this seat didn't work or this is an exit road the seats don't decline or you're close to the bathroom here something like sometimes you're just like I just pick a seat by that you don't know all all the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the da da you don't know all of the yeah the ends and house the ends and outs of the seat in the window versus aisle there's no wrong answer because guess what you're on a plane baby you go in places you're doing stuff you're getting out the house you're getting out your neighborhood you're getting out of your state probably if you're on a. You're getting out the house, you're getting out your neighborhood, you're getting out of your state probably. If you're on a plane, you're probably leaving your states. You hope. Unless it's like a San Francisco, Los Angeles, you live in a big-ass-a-sa-sa. Right?
Starting point is 00:39:52 Anybody flying nowhere. You don't live in Georgia. You don't live in Georgia and fly to another place in Georgia. You're doing all right. You're on a plane. There are people like, there are people who have never been on an airplane. No, I understand. I understand. I'll say here is probably the best place that we can kick it off to you, the listener. How do you, how do you feel who is right, you know? Is it aisle seat or is it window seat? It's not about being right, it's about being blessed, Josh, you on the plane, baby. The question is, the question is, as much as it's about window and aisle, it's, do you
Starting point is 00:40:35 buy your snacks before? Or are you trying to fuck with the snacks that they got on the plane? Never the snacks on the plane I always get before. Thank you so much so so much so much so much so much th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th. Thank you so much th. Thank you so much th. Thank tho tho tho that's that is that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's right. that's that's that. that. that. that. that. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. thi. the. the is right. the is right. the. thea. thea. thea' is right. thea' is right. thean. thean. thean. thean. the. It's the plane. Never the snacks on the plane I always get before. Thank you so much for listening. If you're looking to catch up with us on any of the socials, you can find me at Josh Johnson Comedy on Instagram at Josh Johnson on Twitter, Josh J Comedy on Facebook if you still use it. And Josh Johnson comedy on Tick an and YouTube. And if you're looking for Dulce Sloan on the Instagrams. Uh, it's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. And. It's. It's. It's. It's. I. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. the. And. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. thece Sloan on the Instagram's. It's Dulce Sloan on everything, but it's D-U-L-C-E S-L-A-N.
Starting point is 00:41:10 There is no O in my first name and there is no E in my last name. My name is only 10 letters long, and it is spelled so many ways. It is pronounced so many ways on all the socialsouls. I'm on a Tick Tocks. I'm out here. If you're still on Snapchat, please tell me how. Tumblr, I didn't know they were still open. We appreciate you. We do!
Starting point is 00:41:33 And, you know, always hit us up, let us know if there's anything you want to hear us talk about. Any, uh, what's, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what's, what's, what's, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what????? the, what? the, what? the, what? the, what? the, what? What, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, the. the. the. the. the. the. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. the. the. two subjects that clash that maybe people even know should clash, you know? Yeah, like apples and oranges. I mean why are we compared those for so long? I'm gonna go but y'all have a great day and a great weekend. We'll talk to you in in a little bit. Be bless, losers! Be bless, losers! Listen to hold up on the IHard Radio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcast. Watch the Daily Show, Weeknights at 11, 10 Central on Comedy Central, and stream full episodes any time on Paramount Plus. This has been a Comedy Central podcast.

There aren't comments yet for this episode. Click on any sentence in the transcript to leave a comment.