The Daily Stoic - It Could Just As Easily Be Us… | Stoicism's Formula For Building Resilience
Episode Date: June 18, 2024📕 Right Thing, Right Now is out now! To purchase your own copy, head here: https://store.dailystoic.com/✉️ Want Stoic wisdom delivered to your inbox daily? Sign up for the FREE Daily S...toic email at https://dailystoic.com/dailyemail🏛 Get Stoic inspired books, medallions, and prints to remember these lessons at the Daily Stoic Store: https://store.dailystoic.com/📱 Follow us: Instagram, Twitter, YouTube, TikTok, and FacebookSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Wondery Plus subscribers can listen to the daily Stoic early and ad free right now.
Just join Wondery Plus in the Wondery app or on Apple podcasts.
I've been writing books for a long time now and one of the things I've noticed is how every year,
every book that I do, I'm just here in New York putting right thing right now out.
What a bigger percentage of my audience is listening to them in audiobooks, specifically
on Audible. I've had people had me sign their phones, sign their phone case because they're like I've listened to all your audiobooks
here and my sons they love audiobooks we've been doing it in the car to get
them off their screens because audible helps your imagination soar. It helps you
read efficiently, find time to read when maybe you can't have a physical book in
front of you and then it also lets you discover new kinds of books, re-listen to
books you've already read
from exciting new narrators.
You can explore bestsellers, new releases.
My new book is up,
plus thousands of included audio books and originals,
all with an Audible membership.
You can sign up right now for a free 30-day Audible trial
and try your first audio book for free.
You'll get right thing right now, totally for free.
Visit audible.ca to sign up.
Welcome to the Daily Stoic Podcast, where each day we read a passage of ancient wisdom designed to help you in your everyday life. On Tuesdays,
we take a closer look at these stoic ideas, how we can apply them in our actual lives.
Thanks for listening and I hope you enjoy. It could just as easily be us.
There were the big moments in history where the Stoics, men and women we admire, made the wrong call.
Cato self-righteously turned down an alliance with Pompey and thus drove him into the arms of
Caesar. We have a podcast about this, actually tell the story and write thing right now as well.
Seneca wavered, covered up and continued to serve Nero. It's a great book about this by James Rom.
Rusticus censored Justin Martyr to a gruesome death, a story I talk about in Lives of the Stoics,
and Marcus Aurelius allowedowed for the Persecutions of the Christians. In her fascinating book on Pontius Pilate, which I've been raving about, of course,
and we've also had her on the podcast, Anne Rowe quotes the former British Prime Minister,
Tony Blair, on what Pilate represents. He commands our moral attention, Blair explains,
not because he was a bad man, but because he was so nearly a good man. One can easily imagine him agonizing,
seeing that Jesus had done nothing wrong
and wishing to release him.
Just as easily, however, one can envision Pilate's advisors
telling him the risks,
warning him not to cause a riot or inflame Jewish opinion.
It is a timeless parable of political life.
Seneca, knowing that Nero was awful and unfit,
but he told himself he was a moderating influence.
Rusticus, whose story we tell in the eyes of the Stoics,
told himself that the law was the law
and it was out of his hands.
Cicero declined to pick a side in Rome's civil wars,
putting his finger to the wind like a politician.
These Stoics were tested and they made the wrong call. They command our moral
attention because they could have done differently. We are them and they are us. Life puts us all in
these situations, subjects us to these tests. Marx really said that what mattered was that we did
the right thing, whether we were tired or hungry, cold or well rested, despised or loved. But reality shows us how hard this actually is.
Their example humbles us, teaches us, and most of all shows us the costs of falling short.
You have to have a physical practice.
That doesn't seem like it's a philosophical idea, but it is.
Socrates, the wisest, greatest philosopher who ever lived, he said, it's inexcusable
for a citizen not to keep themselves in shape, to not be trained.
And he meant that because you could get called up to military service at any moment, but
also your family could need you, a stranger could need you, you had to have a strong mind
and a strong body, he was saying. He said also it's disgraceful to become old and
not know what your body is truly capable of. And in fact all of the Stoics had a
physical practice like this, something they did on a regular basis that
challenged them. Marcus Aurelius hunted, he rode horses. There was a stoic Chrysippus who was a distance runner. There was a stoic
Cleanthes who was a boxer. This is what a philosopher actually is a hearty person,
an active person, an engaged person, a person who has command of the greatest
empire themselves. That's why Seneca said, we treat the body rigorously so that
it's not disobedient to the mind. I'm
Ryan Holiday, I write books about philosophy but I also train in
philosophy in the sense that I'm always pushing myself physically. I'm trying to
run or bike or swim or lift weights or do something really hard every single
day and this is part of my philosophical training. Pushing myself physically,
pushing myself mentally, taking care of myself, seeing what my body is capable of.
That's what we're going to talk about in today's episode.
The stoic art of discipline, of training, but also avoiding over training.
The stoic practice of endurance, also the stoic act of resilience, coming back from
injury, recovering, pushing yourself.
It's actually that latter part that I want to start with because I'm going through something right now myself
that changed the course of this video.
I wanted to do a video where I set a record
with my mile time.
I was trying to break five minutes with my mile again
to get below five minutes and I had plans for that.
I've been training for it.
I've been thinking about it.
I could almost taste it, but then life,
fortune, the Stokes would say,
had very different plans for me.
So what happened is I was running in Arizona. It was like five in the morning. I make it like
two steps down the road and I go down super hard. There's rolling your ankle and then there's like
hurting your ankle. And so I was like, oh, I just rolled it. And then I ran like five miles anyway.
Yeah. And then, which was not smart, like the next day, it was like, I couldn't even get my shoe on.
Yeah, that's bad.
Yeah, it's worse because then, like you said,
if you don't get to run,
then it just totally messes with your energy
and your mindset and you're like,
dude, I gotta find a way to work out.
I think for me, very often, it takes more discipline
to be like, it's not smart to do this.
I'm going to rest than it does to-
Power through.
Yeah, yeah. Like the default is doing it, which is good.
You wanna get to a place where the hard thing,
the default is doing the hard thing,
but then the problem is that can become its own bad habit.
Yeah, yeah.
I wasn't feeling great anyway.
I was like, I'm gonna take a week off.
So I took a week off, then I biked like seven days later
and I didn't feel anything.
So I went running the next day,
I got right back in the routine.
And even though my foot had been all bruised
from how I rolled the ankle, I thought I was better.
There was a little bit of pain, I pushed through it
and I thought all was well.
And then about 10 or so days later,
I'm walking down the stairs of my house.
I make it down one stair of a two stair flight of stairs.
And I heard this snap and my leg gave out
and I swear to God I thought I would look down
and see bone coming out of my leg.
That's how bad it hurt and I was screaming.
I think I was mostly angry, I was like angry at myself
because I knew I was seriously hurt in that moment.
I knew I wasn't gonna be running anytime soon but most of all I knew that I had done angry at myself because I knew I was seriously hurt in that moment. I knew I wasn't going to be running anytime soon.
But most of all, I knew that I had done this to myself.
Steinbeck has this great quote.
He says, the ill discipline of overwork, the falsest of economies, the stoic virtue of
discipline, they rendered it as temperance or moderation.
And that's what I had screwed up.
Right.
I'd over trained first and foremost.
And then when I'd hurt myself,
I hadn't listened to my body.
And I forced myself to get back to it
before I was recovered.
The result was now I was seriously injured.
And I ended up having to go to an orthopedist here in Texas
who thankfully confirmed that the ankle wasn't broken.
It was still swollen like 10 days after I got the X-ray.
I had to do a bunch of physical therapy,
which is actually what I have to go do now.
So not only am I not getting to work out,
now I have to go do physical therapy to rehab this ankle.
And the worst part is that, you know, I also,
I mean, there's a part of me, I can tell why I forced it.
I feel embarrassed just even going,
oh, it's a sprained ankle.
Like I would have almost rather be broken
because it would give me an excuse.
All right, so good news, bad news. Couple more weeks, they said no running.
I don't have to wear this brace anymore.
I got some acupuncture, that felt crazy.
I've got to do 60 double leg calf raises every day
and 20 single leg balances every day.
I've hurt myself a lot.
I've broken a lot of bones over the years.
And if you had asked me,
I would have swore to you this was broken just instantly.
Sometimes you feel like you're gonna just tell.
I think it surprised me.
I mean, like when you're young,
you're just used to your body doing what you want.
And to have twice in such a short amount of time,
the body just go nope,
sorry for gravity to just take you and fling you around like a plaything.
It's humbling, it's humbling, but this is something I'm going to have to take seriously.
I'm going to have to train through and then hopefully what I take from it first off just
some appreciation and gratitude that I am mostly healthy and what these things, these activities mean for me.
And then hopefully I learn some practices,
some exercises that make me better, stronger,
more resilient as I go forward.
It's funny as I was walking in
to physical therapy the other day,
first time the woman was like,
oh, are you a runner?
And I said, how did you know?
Is it like in my chart or something?
She was like, no, I could tell from the shoes because I was wearing my Hoka's, which I've been
wearing all the time lately. Conceived in the mountains and designed to defy the odds,
Hoka delivers an unprecedented combination of enhanced cushioning and support for a uniquely
smooth ride. That's what I always feel about them. I've been wearing the new Mach 6 from finish
lines to everyday life. Hoka fans love the brand.
Get what's next in fast with Hoka shoes.
I love wearing them.
It's what I'm wearing when I'm writing.
It's what I'm wearing when I'm going on walks
to think about what I'm trying to write.
It's got high-performance foam.
It's got a sleek stripped down upper.
It's lightweight and responsive.
It's got the Hoka cushion
that if you've ever put Hoka shoes on,
you know what I'm talking about.
And the ones I'm wearing right now have this upgraded midsole from ProFly Plus.
Join Hoka on the journey.
Embrace limitless possibilities.
Run like race day every day.
Like if you listen to your body, no one would ever run 50 or 100 or 200 miles, right? Because the body's like,
this is a terrible idea. Definitely don't do this. Stop right now and do literally anything else.
So you question that. But also when your body's like, hey, you're about to blow out your knee,
you know what I mean? Like how do you, how do you know what to listen to and not listen to if you
get in the habit of ignoring the test flags or if you start to view them all as these as
these false positives basically.
Initially, so my first hundred mile attempt.
I did not finish around mile 60 and after that I had kind of
the attitude of I'll finish anything now like I'm going to
figure out this sport.
I'm going to push through every situation
because that first time I quit the race, I didn't need to.
You know, those warning signs weren't anything different
than what anyone feels at mile 60 out of 100 miles.
It feels hard.
And I kind of had a little like wondering or worry
that I wouldn't notice the big flags
when they showed up.
Just a few years back, I did end up quitting a race due to injury.
And those were all, you know, huge flags going up during the race that something not right
was happening with my legs and that pushing past it wasn't it wasn't the move to make if I
wanted to keep enjoying this sport for many years to come and so I was kind of
reassured from that scenario of like okay you have been getting in tune with
your body and learning it and you can trust yourself a little bit more to
listen to those big flags but it's so individual and so much of it is based on just like knowing yourself
and knowing what the signs are
and what those flags are even saying.
I remember when I was writing The Obstacle is the Way,
I was reading about this study they did
on elite athletes in Canada.
Basically, they interviewed these world-class athletes
that had suffered a severe injury.
They looked at where they were many months later, and obviously there's trauma that comes along with an injury.
But what they found is that some of these athletes were better. They loved the game
more. They fit in with their teammates more. They had more energy. Whatever the injury
was, they may have still been struggling there. But there was what psychologists call post-traumatic
growth associated with the injury. They had a bigger perspective
They had a different understanding of themselves
They appreciated things more when I read that I ended up including them in the book and talking about in the book what I
Immediately appreciated about that was something that I'd experienced when I was writing my first book trust me
I'm like lived in New Orleans and I was riding my bike in the French Quarter down to the gym
I worked out this place called the New Orleans Athletic Club almost every Orleans and I was riding my bike in the French Quarter down to the gym. I worked out at this place called
the New Orleans Athletic Club almost every day.
And I'm riding my bike down there
and I get stuck in the streetcar track
and I go over the handlebar and I shatter my left elbow.
And I'm in a sling for like six weeks, something like that,
and I couldn't type, right?
And so I thought, oh, this is totally
gonna screw up the book.
It's gonna hold me back in so many ways.
Not only because I couldn't physically use my hand
to type very well, but because I couldn't work out.
And I knew that was such a big part of my creative process.
So what did I end up doing?
I ended up taking lots of really long walks.
I've walked every street in New Orleans multiple times.
I walked for hours and hours and hours.
And so this injury that I had,
it prevented me from doing what I wanted to do
But in those long walks in the delay that was caused to the book
I got this great advantage in that I got outside I experienced this new place in this new city
But as I was walking I was also thinking and it totally changed how I thought about the book
Changed the ideas that went into the book it forced me to take the book slower
So this idea that the obstacles the way or there's such a thing as
post-traumatic growth as well as post-traumatic stress, I've personally
experienced, right? I've been through that. So then with this injury or any injury
or any slowdown or any obstacle, I try to remind myself there was this thing that
happened that you thought was the worst thing that could have happened, that you
were so upset about, that you were dreading. And yet, because you responded
to it right, you controlled yourself, you were so upset about that you were dreading and yet because you responded to it right you controlled yourself your discipline but also you were open to it you
accepted your powerlessness over it and you worked with it you were able to make something good from
it but in fact you can grow and change and be improved in ways that you couldn't have done
otherwise and that's the blessing in it that's the good thing about it stress down oh just found a
nail on the road see if i hadn't had to go for my walk tonight,
I wouldn't have found this nail,
and maybe this nail would have popped someone's tire.
And so that's just a good thing that happened from it,
and I try to focus on that.
That's the perspective I try to take on it.
That's the lens I look at the situation,
and more importantly, that's what I try to make true
with the actions that I take.
On December 7th, 2017,
Ryan Shazer was playing his Monday night football.
He gets smacked and he gets laid out in the field.
And by all appearances, he is paralyzed.
The doctors thought he would never walk again.
He spends months and months in the hospital.
His NFL career is almost certainly over.
Yeah, the use of his legs or any of his extremities is serious doubt,
many points in this journey.
And at some point, one of the owners of the Steelers
gave him a copy of the obstacle is the way.
He reached out and asked if he could give Ryan
my phone number and we started texting back and forth.
And it was this incredible experience for me
because you're watching someone go through
a real injury and real adversity.
As we talked about, I had him on the Daily Show podcast at 1.2.
I remember he was telling me that one of the things that he thought of in those very dark
days when he was wondering if he would walk again, but he had decided that he would walk
again and that he would try to play again and that he would have a full and complete
life despite this terrible setback or adversity.
He was saying, you know, in football you learn that football is a game of inches.
And he said, I was just going to focus on getting to the next inch, the next inch, right?
And cumulatively, you pile enough inches on top of each other, eventually you get yards
and eventually you can travel from one end of the field to the other and you can score.
This is actually something Mark Scruas talks about
in meditation, he says, action by action, step by step.
He says, this is how we assemble our life.
No one can stop us from doing that sort of next
little right thing.
We don't know how long the recovery is gonna take.
We don't know what fully is or isn't possible, right?
The doctors are saying, hey, you'll never walk again.
Maybe you can walk again,
but that's in the very distant future.
Part of what in sports they call the process
But maybe in in stillness and they call the logos you just sort of trust the logos you trust the process you just do that
Little thing in front of you. You don't go. When is this gonna be over? What's the resolution gonna be?
You're also not thinking backwards like whose fault is this?
How could it have been avoided how unfair it is that it happened to me?
You're just focused on doing that sort of next right thing.
You see recovery, you see success as a game of inches.
This is one of my favorite quotes from Zeno.
He says, you know,
well-being is realized by small steps,
but it's no small thing.
And Ryan Jay-Z!
Yeah!
Yeah!
Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Ryan Jay-Z! I think one of the hardest stoic practices is this idea of acceptance, particularly if
you're a strong-willed and ambitious person, a hard-driving person who has gotten past
limitations or constraints, maybe even done things that people said is impossible,
right? You're used to bending reality of the world, even your physical body, to
your whim. But of course, as strong as any one person is, ultimately we're all
powerless in the face of life, in the face of gravity, of injuries, the case of
our own inevitable physical decline as we age. Mark Sturlus has this great
passage that I've been thinking about doing the physical therapy
thing, not getting to do this thing that I want to do.
Mark Surrealist talks about the sheer amount
of unpleasantness we will put up with on doctor's orders.
Right, he says if the doctor told you to do it,
take this gross medicine, rest this, we're like,
okay, the doctor says I have to, so I have to.
We would just do it, we don't fight against it.
Marcus Aurelius, the most powerful man in the world,
has to take orders from his doctors,
in the same way that all of us ultimately have to submit,
not just to doctors, but to the things that happen
to us in life, the things that we don't have
any control over.
And so that too is a skill that you have to practice.
And I feel silly, weird doing these physical therapy
exercises, but the doctor said to do them.
So, spending my energy fighting it, I'm going with it.
Taking the doctor's orders,
cause I got myself in this mess by ignoring medical advice
and doctor's orders first go around,
but I'm also saying I'm liking the chance
to practice doing that.
All right, first run on the angle.
Let's see how it goes.
It didn't feel terrible, but it didn't feel amazing.
I'm walking back, and I'm going to wait and see.
I'm going to use the discipline here to practice some patience
as opposed to forcing it. Learning my
lesson a little bit. I'm reminded of this great passage from Seneca where Seneca says, you know,
there's this word, euthymia, and he said, euthymia is a sense of the path that you're on and not being
misled by the paths that crisscross yours. He says, especially the paths of people who are lost. I
think basically what he's saying is
you gotta run your own race.
You don't compare yourself to other people.
This is a really important running lesson
because when you're running you wanna go fast
and you wanna win.
But really the race you're running against is yourself.
And in this case I'm definitely running against myself.
I'm running against my ability to not do the thing.
I'm trying to recover and I have to recover at my own pace
per doctor's orders when my body's ready.
So what other people are doing, how I normally run in this same distance or in this same place, all of it is irrelevant.
I have to look at the instance as a totally unique set of circumstances.
I have to not think about or care about what other people are doing and I just have to do what I need to do in that moment
and tune out the rest and not be misled by myself
or the paths and the races of other people.
When people find out that you're a runner, they always ask, are you training for a marathon?
And the answer is no, I'm training for this.
Running every day, that's the marathon.
Running when you don't want to, running when you're tired, running when it's cold, running
when it's hot.
Doing it, pushing yourself, that's the marathon.
Seneca says,
we treat the body rigorously
so that it's not disobedient to the mind.
We're training ourselves, we're training our muscles.
Literally, we're also building the muscle
that makes us do stuff day to day
that runs the marathon of life.
We're developing the ability to push ourselves,
to demand stuff from ourselves.
And that's the ultimate race. That's the competition, right?
You're competing with yourself. You're competing with the desire to not do it
If you're competing with anyone you're competing against all the people that are doing nothing that are staying on the couch
Epictetus is great line was run races
We're winning is up to you the race against, the race against the desire to not do it,
the race against the impulse to stay on the couch,
that's where we're challenging ourselves,
that's where we're pushing ourselves,
that's the race that you're doing every single day.
So that was my first five mile loop,
the one I usually do.
I can't say that I'm faster than I was before,
I'm definitely not. It's probably
30 plus seconds a mile slower. I can't necessarily say I'm glad that all this happened, but I feel
like I can say I'm better as a result of what happened. I had to reevaluate some stuff. I learned
some new exercises. I had to focus on finding another outlet for that energy. I learned again, a reminder about
Faustina Lente, make haste slowly.
When you push a recovery faster than it should be,
you are actually slowing things way, way down.
And I think most importantly, I got a perspective.
I was reminded as those elite athletes were,
what the sport means to me, what the practice means to me,
the role that it plays in my life,
and how I have to take care of it
and take care of myself going forward.
And I also, you know, you learn something
about yourself bouncing back from an injury,
you learn something about your pain tolerance,
you learn something about your resilience,
you learn something about your buoyancy
and your determination.
And I feel good about that.
And now I'm gonna work myself back,
hopefully close to where I was before, hopefully faster.
My goal this year had been to get my mile time
under five minutes.
Well, I am not even close to that right now,
but it gives me something to shoot for.
It's gonna make it a tougher challenge.
And as a result, I'll be better for having wrestled with it.
That's what the Stoics say that when we're challenged,
we want to see life as having paired us
with a strong sparring partner.
And we get better for that sparring,
for that wrestling, for that challenge,
for getting thrown around, for getting hurt,
for maybe even getting our ass beat.
And that's how I feel about it now.
I'll see you next time.
When I wrote the Daily Stoic eight years ago, I had this crazy idea that I would just you next time. every single day and would for almost a decade. If you want to get the email, if you want to be part of a community that is the largest group of stoics ever assembled in human history,
I'd love for you to join us. You can sign up and get the email totally for free. No spam.
You can unsubscribe whenever you want at dailystoic.com slash email. If you like The Daily Stoic and thanks for listening, you can listen early and ad free
right now by joining Wondery Plus in the Wondery app or on Apple podcasts.
Prime members can listen ad free on Amazon Music.
And before you go, would you tell us about yourself
by filling out a short survey on wondery.com slash survey.
How much do you really know about black history?
Like really, really know.
Wondery's new podcast, Black History for Real,
we use black history's most overlooked figures
back into their rightful place in culture
and the world at large.
Listen to Black History for Real on the Wondery app
or wherever you get your podcasts.