The Daily Stoic - Now That You Know, Do Better | Wants Make You A Servant

Episode Date: April 28, 2023

We look back on things we clearly messed up. We were too preoccupied. We were too harsh. We were wrong. We didn’t know.And because we messed up, we feel guilty. We regret what could have been. We’re mad at ourselves. We wallow in pity or shame.Dr. Edith Eger, the Holocaust survivor, cut through all this with her graceful bluntness on the Daily Stoic podcast recently (she’s been on twice, both episodes are must listens). “I’ll give you a sentence,” she said. “If I knew then, what I know now, I would have done things differently.”---And in today's excerpt from the Daily Stoic, Ryan explores why "the highest power is no power if you desire nothing." ✉️ Sign up for the Daily Stoic email: https://dailystoic.com/dailyemail🏛 Check out the Daily Stoic Store for Stoic inspired products, signed books, and more.📱 Follow us: Instagram, Twitter, YouTube, TikTok, FacebookSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hey, prime members, you can listen to the Daily Stoic podcast early and add free on Amazon music. Download the app today. Welcome to the Daily Stoic podcast. On Friday, we do double duty, not just reading our daily meditation, but also reading a passage from the Daily Stoic. My book, 366 Meditations on Wisdom, Perseverance in the Heart of Living, which I wrote with my wonderful collaborator, translator, and a literary agent, Stephen Hanselman. So today, I will give you a quick meditation from the Stokes with some analysis from me, and then we'll send you out into the world to turn

these words into works. Now that you know, do better. We look back on things that we clearly messed up. We were too preoccupied, we were too harsh, we were wrong, we didn't know. And because we messed up, we feel guilty. We regret what could have been. We're mad at ourselves. We wallow in pity or shame. Dr. Edith Egger, the Holocaust survivor,

cut through all of this with her graceful bluntness on the Daily Stoic podcast recently. She's been on twice. Both episodes are must listen. As she said, if I knew then, but I know now, I would have done things differently." That is the end of that, she said.

And so it must be for us. Give yourself the gift of the present moment, Mark's Relious Wrote and Meditations. Seize this second chance. Don't waste it on guilt because, as Dr. Edgar said, guilt is about the past. And the past is the one thing we cannot change. All we can do is do better now. We can take

the feeling we have now be it shame or regret or the heavy price of consequences and use it as evidence as to why we must make the right choice today. All we can do is do things differently going forward. It's funny. I talked to lots of people and a good chunk of those people haven't been readers for a long time. They've just gotten back into it. And I always love hearing that and they tell me how they fall in love with reading. They're reading more than ever. And I go, let me guess, you listen audiobooks, don't you? And it's true. and almost invariably, they listen to them on Audible. And that's because Audible offers an incredible selection of audiobooks across every genre from bestsellers and new releases to celebrity memoirs, and of course, ancient philosophy, all my books are available on audio, read by me for the most part.

Audible lets you enjoy all your audio entertainment in one app. You'll always find the best of what you love, or something new to discover, and as an Audible member, you get to choose one title a month to keep from their entire catalog, including the latest best sellers and new releases. You'll discover thousands of titles from popular favorites, exclusive new series, exciting new voices in audio. You can check out stillness is the key, the daily dad I just recorded. So that's up on audible now coming up on the 10 year anniversary of the obstacle is the way audio books. so all those are available, and new members can try audible for free for 30 days. Visit audible.com slash daily stoke or text daily stoke to 500-500.

That's audible.com slash daily stoke or text daily stoke to 500-500. Once make you a servant. This is the April 28th entry in the Daily Stoic. The highest power. This is a quote from one of Sena Kuz most brutal and fascinating plays The S.D.'s which is worth reading and I've talked about in a couple different entries of the podcast one with One of my favorites of course with James Rahm, But here's the quote again, the highest power is no power. If you desire nothing.

In the modern world, our interactions with tyranny are a bit more voluntary than they were in ancient times. We put up with our controlling boss, even though we could probably get a different job. If we wanted one, we change how we dress or refrain from saying, what we actually think because we want to fit in with some cool group, we put up with a cruel critic or customers because we want their approval or their business. And in these cases, these powers exist because of our wants.

You change that and you're free. The late fashion photographer Bill Cunningham occasionally declined to invoice magazines for his work When a young upstart asked him why that was Cunningham's response was epic if you don't take the money They can't tell you what to do kid Remember that taking the money and wanting the money makes you a servant to the people who have it in Difference to that Assenica puts it turns the highest power into no power, at least as far as your life is concerned.

I've said before that my definition of success is spelled autonomy. I want control over my own life. If I don't have that, it doesn't matter how much money I have, how respected I am, how powerful I am, I'm not that powerful because I can't do what I want. I don't control my day. My wants control my day. My needs control my day. What I've agreed to, what I've signed up to controls my day.

And I don't like that. It doesn't make me feel good and it reminds me that I'm wasting this precious resource. And I love seeing people who have to make this decision at a much bigger level. Rory Mikorooroi, actually, I think it was he read this entry of the Daily Stoke and then he was asked to join this new golf league and he quoted that bill cutting hamline that he got from the book and said, if they don't take the money, they can't tell you what to do. You want to find what you want to do in life, the place you want to be, and then you have to be able to say no.

You know, they talk about this idea of fuck you money. Fuck you money is when you have so much money that you get to say what you really think. You know, you get to be rude, Pat. There's that great line in the first episode of Billion's Brian Cobbler. It's just such a great writer, but the line in that show is, what's the point of having fuck you money if you never say fuck you? And sorry, I know it's a lot of cursing and stuff. So but the point is I actually don't think you need fuck you money You just need like polite no thanks money

You just need the power of being content with what you have There's a there's a still a crime we quoted on daily still sometimes people Sometimes don't like it sounds very privileged. I believe it's Santa Claus saying, you know, poverty isn't having little. It's wanting more. I think he's saying that obviously has a very rich successful person. What he means is he sees the people who can't say no Maybe he's even speaking to himself. He wanted to be in the center of things He wanted to be in the room where it happened. He wanted to throw big parties. He wanted to have beautiful estates And this puts him in a position where it's hard for him to say no.

He doesn't have as much control over his life as you'd think someone in that position is. So the point is, tyranny is not just the tyrant telling you what to do. It's not just, you know, living in Vladimir Putin's Russia. Tyranny is not just slavery. Tyranny is also often self-imposed. Tierney is also often self-imposed. Slavery is often self-imposed. We put ourselves on a treadmill. We put ourselves in a position of vulnerability. We put ourselves in a position of dependency because we want to get this.

We want to get there. We want to have access to this, we want to be like these people. And that makes us have to agree to do certain things. That makes us need to spend a certain amount. That makes us need to dress certain way. The people who don't give a shit about any of that, the people who are content with what they have, people who have enough, that's a position of real power. And I tell that story in stillness is the key, and we have a pretty viral video about it that, you know what, I'll just play it. We have this great story. This is one of the most viewed TikToks we've ever done. I'll just play it for you because I think it really captures exactly what Cunningham is saying, captures exactly what Cunningham is saying captures exactly what Santa is saying that the ultimate power freedom in life is to have enough. There's an amazing story about Kurt Vonnegut and Joseph

Heller who wrote Catch 22 and Slotter House 5. They're at the party, this billionaire. Vonnegut is teasing Heller and he says, this billionaire whose house we're at, he made more money this week than your book will make it its entire life. And he says, but I have something that he doesn't have. Vonnegut says, what's that? And he says, I have some idea of what enough is.

He says, I have enough. This idea of enough is so powerful. Seneca, who quotes Epicurus, says, if you don't regard what you have as enough, you will never be happy even if you rule the entire world. Enough is never enough, the Epicurans in the Stoic say, for the person who enough is too little. And if you can get to a place of enough, what I have is good, everything else is extra, then everything you get is a bonus and the rest of your life is amazing. But if you tell yourself you'll only be happy

if, if I'll feel better when, you'll never get there. The finish line will move, I promise you. Enough is enough. Hey, prime members, you can listen to the Daily Stoke early and add free on Amazon music. Download the Amazon music app today, or you can listen early and add free with Wondery Plus in Apple podcasts. Celebrity feuds are high stakes. You never know if you're just going to end up on Page Six or Du Moir or in court. I'm Matt Bellesai. And I'm Sydney Battle, and we're the host of Wonder E's new podcast, Dis and Tell, where each episode we unpack a different iconic celebrity feud,

from the build-up, why it happened, and the repercussions. What does our obsession with these feuds say about us? The first season is packed with some pretty messy pop culture drama, but none is drawn out in personal as Britney and Jamie Lynn Spears. When Britney's fans form the free Britney movement dedicated to fraying her from the infamous conservatorship, Jamie Lynn's lack of public support, it angered some fans, a lot of them. It's a story of two young women who had their choices taken away from them

by their controlling parents, but took their anger out on each other. And it's about a movement to save a superstar, which set its sights upon anyone who failed to fight for Brittany. Follow Dissentel wherever you get your podcast. You can listen ad free on Amazon Music or The Wondering App. you