The Daily Zeitgeist - Corona Poets, RIP Pants 3.31.20
Episode Date: March 31, 2020In episode 598, Miles and Jamie are joined by comedian Matt Lieb to discuss celebrity coronavirus songs, how none of this is Trump's fault, needing to keep an eye on prisoners and the disabled, the pa...nts industry failing, fashion companies creating protective gear for hospital workers, Canada taking their social services seriously, updates from Tiger King, and more!FOOTNOTES: Jon Bon Jovi Crowdsources Lyrics for New Song About Coronavirus Pandemic (Video) #DoWhatYouCan - These are uneasy times we’re dealing with, but we’re all in this together. I wrote the first verse and the chorus. Write me a verse. Let’s tell your story.... #DoWhatYouCan -JBJ 'Sing across rooftops': Bono writes coronavirus song dedicated to Italy Bono Enlists Will.i.am, Jennifer Hudson and Yoshiki for ‘Sing for Life’ Jeremy Renner Just Dropped a New EP, and He’s Hoping It’s The Medicine You Need Nothing That Happens Is the President's Fault. It's Hoarding Hospitals, or Ungrateful Governors, or Obama. People With Intellectual Disabilities May Be Denied Lifesaving Care Under These Plans as Coronavirus Spreads Vulnerable prisoners 'exploited' to make coronavirus masks and hand gel Texas turns to prison labor to help cover face mask shortages Activists Are Not Happy With New York’s Plan to Use Prison Labor to Make Hand Sanitizer Inmates are manufacturing hand sanitizer to help fight coronavirus. But will they be allowed to use it? Cuomo's Prison Workers Say They're Not Actually Making Hand Sanitizer As population works from home, Walmart reports increased sales for tops but not pants Business on top, pajamas underneath: Walmart is selling work shirts, but not so many pants FANATICS 1 MILLION MASKS, GOWNS FROM JERSEYS ... For Coronavirus Heroes Fashion industry answers the call for masks and personal protective equipment to fight Covid-19 Canada to Pay 75 Percent of Wages for Entertainment Producers Hit by Pandemic Yep, That's Doc Antle Wrangling a Tiger During Britney Spears's Iconic 2001 VMA Performance SHAQ FIRES BACK AT 'TIGER KING' CRITICS ... Joe Exotic Is NOT My Friend To anyone currently bingeing #tigerking on Netflix: I spent four years working on a podcast and a long magazine story about Joe and Carole. I spent a week living at the zoo. I’ve spoken with almost everyone you’re seeing in the doc, and I attended the trial. Ask me anything! WATCH: Paranoid Android (Radiohead Cover) - Brad Mehldau Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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Daphne Caruana Galizia was a Maltese investigative journalist who on October 16th 2017 was assassinated.
Crooks Everywhere unearthed the plot to murder a one-woman WikiLeaks.
She exposed the culture of crime and corruption that were turning her beloved country into a mafia state.
Listen to Crooks Everywhere starting September 25th on the iHeartRadio app,
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Kay hasn't heard from her sister in seven years.
I have a proposal for you. Come up here and document my project.
All you need to do is record everything like you always do.
What was that?
That was live audio of a woman's nightmare.
Can Kay trust her sister or is history repeating itself?
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They're just dreams.
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Hi, I am Lacey Lamar.
And I'm also Lacey Lamar. Just kidding, I'm Amber Reffin.
What?
Okay, everybody, we have exciting news to share.
We're back with season two of the Amber and Lacey, Lacey and Amber show on Will Ferrell's Big Money Players Network.
This season, we make new friends, deep dive into my steamy DMs, answer your listener questions and more.
The more is punch each other.
Listen to the Amber and Lacey, Lacey and Amber show on Will Ferrell's Big Money Players Network on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts.
Just listen, okay?
Or Lacey gets into it.
Oh, well, hello, Internet, and welcome to Season 127, Episode 2 of the Daily Zeitgeist,
a production of iHeartRadio.
This is a podcast.
You know what we do.
We go into America's brain, and we say, oh, no oh no no What are we doing right now
Not like this not right now
Please God please stop
Stop taking videos of hospitals
Trying to prove some kind of weird conspiracy theory
Please America stop
And you know
We like to say officially off the top
Fuck the Koch brothers as in the Koch industries
And also fuck Fox News
It's Tuesday March 31 31st, 2020.
My name is Miles Gray, a.k.a.
Tell all the workers to lay down in bed.
Tell them that the virus needs proximity to spread.
Let them keep their distance.
Let them stay away from crowds.
Then stand back and marvel how the fuck this all went down.
Cause I saw the virus.
Now understand.
Yeah, I saw the virus.
And the virus saw man.
Oh my goodness.
Thank you to Hannah Soltis
for that Tiger King inspired
AKA.
And I am thrilled to be joined
in the guest seat,
my co-host seat,
by the frequent podcast guest
and host and just whatever
you want to call this Zamboni,
this human Zamboni come to life.
Please welcome Jamie Loftus.
Thursday with Zams up,
another week gone with Jack and Miles McRae.
Tana on the gram like, yeah.
And ballerina slippers like, yeah.
Thank God for Zams,
pop a sunny bad dog.
We'll conquer through the mess, okay.
Hey, it's pandemic in the USA.
Ooh, got pitchy at the end,
but I stand by it.
Now it's Sabre.
Wait, it's Sabre?
Oh, no.
Sabre?
It's not Sabre.
Whoa.
It's Sabre?
Oh, boy.
We were practicing Sabre.
Little office reference.
Thank you, Jamie,
for joining me on this journey.
How are you doing on this Tuesday?
I think I'm fine.
So, you know, it's fine.
I've accepted it.
It's fine, I think.
Okay, that's good.
It's about accepting, you know.
Poop update.
We haven't done a poop update in a couple of days.
But I started unable to poop and then was doing great for a couple days,
and now I'm back to not being able to poop.
Get that water in.
That's the thing I've been forgetting, man.
Seeking solutions.
I'm pounding the agua right now.
I'm about to go to Walgreens and get some assistance.
Yeah, we should probably bring our guest in
so we can also discuss their bowel movements as well.
Please welcome the hilarious uh
talented just one of the one of the greats uh matt lieb thank you sir when you get caught
between matt lieb and covid 19 hell yeah i thought of that while you guys were doing your thing
and i'm glad i did it how are you man oh i'm flourishing if i'm being real with you
flourishing in quarantine and i'm sure you've heard this before from other guests but uh i was
i was built for this i was flourishing dystopia oh i was built for it I, I didn't know how much I needed a break from just the,
from the above ground until,
until this all happened.
And now I'm just like,
yeah,
this is,
this is a good life.
This is a sick life.
I don't have FOMO anymore.
Everyone's missing out.
I have no fear of it.
Like,
yeah,
FOMO is absolutely gone.
That's the, that's the greatest thing about this I think this is like I don't know if I will gain anything from from this experience but
I think one of the things that I've gained is is like I need to be able to cut out FOMO
somehow and like if that means you know like having to maybe get
off the social medias or something I don't know what it is
but it's like no one's doing anything
everyone's thirsty online
everyone's live streaming
and we're all doing it together we're all live
streaming together and I love it
our thirst is all equal now
I love it
this is communism
break me off a piece of this communism is what I'm saying.
I do love the, like, everyone is kind of on a very similar low simmering horniness.
Yes.
It's just a low simmer.
It's nice.
It feels just right.
I'll look at my partner's, her pants on the floor and be like, oh, man.
My fucking pants can get it like just weird things are inspiring like damn pants are on the floor man i know someone i knew she was wearing
them at one point yeah um yeah that's just kind of where we're at those fucking pants
there's also like i was reading a few op-eds from people like i wasn't on jezebel or
somewhere where they were this like woman was saying she's like cannot stop i fucking strangers
right now just whenever she like walks her dog or goes for a run it's like everyone is i fucking
like crazy in the streets interesting because like no one because everyone's alone and they're just
they're just horny and alone and so yeah i got i got my feelings low-key hurt on my daily outside yesterday
where I was like, I have a specific route now.
It's not busy.
I didn't even know this area of my neighborhood existed,
but I found a quiet area.
It's a good two miles.
And I was walking past someone, and I i stand by i think we were six feet
apart but she was like need more distance and i was like oh my god she just like yelled it at me
wow i know that's so rude she was on the sidewalk i like literally i was just walking in the street
to accommodate her yeah i mean i i try to keep died when i go outside i try to keep my distance
from people.
But I think if I had that experience, I'd be like, yeah, even going outside for 15 minutes was a mistake.
Stay inside.
Yeah, right.
Exactly.
I deserve that.
Yeah.
Right.
Yeah.
Yeah.
You're right, old lady.
You are at risk.
I am young and strong.
Exactly.
I'm like, I am flexing my youth by standing even within eight feet of you
yeah yeah yeah put yourself at risk yeah get in the street maybe it'll be a car who knows
uh okay let's just give people a quick preview of what we're going to talk about today we're
going to talk more there's more celebrity corona songs coming out just a few more we talked about jeremy renner's uh but there's more about it again
jan bonyovi and bono himself uh also just some heroes gonna shout out some heroes uh we'll keep
the trump bullshit to a minimum i think it's it's becoming useless uh up to a certain point but we'll
just let you know the headlines so you're aware of things that would make your skin crawl. Just keep an eye out on some vulnerable groups during this pandemic,
as well as a surge in one industry.
A surge in one product over another, plus Tiger King updates.
Very, very much needed Tiger King updates.
But first, Matt, what is something from your search history
that's revealing about
who you are um well i've looked up uh least coronavirus deaths country um just to know
like if there's one place where everyone is just kind of chilling like no one's got it and
everyone's just like damn you know what this was a smart idea to move
to to this weird island so i i was i was looking at a few of them and papua new guinea oh papa
yeah so that they got they got one one case and you got to feel bad for that one guy
you know yeah or you know there's been a lot of like leaders too have
been like we have zero cases but that's also because we've had zero tests right yeah zero
which is so yeah but uh hey you know i'm i'm always curious to see what i mean which uh you
know we should find an island to all buy together yes there's saint vincent grenadines has just one case. And so does Timor-Leste?
I don't know that one.
Timor-Leste.
Okay.
Well, then we'll have to check those places out.
We'll have to check in on them.
So if you have COVID, don't go there.
Everyone who's safe, we're all going to go there eventually.
If it keeps getting worse and worse.
Do you know people who in LA were stupid enough to flee the city to go party?
I know so many people.
Like in the desert?
Oh, well, I don't know.
Wait, did you say party?
Or whatever.
Or whatever.
Just flee to other places where they probably should not have.
No.
Oh, for sure.
Yeah. no for sure yeah what i do know is i know of a lot of comedians who have left la to
be with their families and wherever they're from and it's kind of an interesting move because i'm
like on the one hand i get it you want to you want to be with your family in this time of crisis
shelter in place also you know everything's closing down it's hard to pay rent food all that i get it on the other hand are you not risking your whole family's life uh you know
just to right just to be near them so i i have seen that happen a lot and i've seen things too
where at least people like people would go home and then they were quarantining like in the garage
for two weeks before they went in their house or something where they were quarantining like in the garage for two weeks
before they went in their house or something where they were like okay i know it's potentially like a
super reckless thing to do so i'll try and do the minimum of like being cordoned off for a little
bit and then entering the home but yeah it's tough man because this is the thing like we have such a
human need for contact and intimacy and to be around loved ones and
to know that like you could potentially be the bringer of illness is is tough to to weigh did
you guys you guys are both in la right yeah yeah see because you're not quitters you know everyone
else all the comedians who move back with their families, you know, I just think that they're all they're all quitters and cowards.
Real L.A. comedians.
You stay during the pandemic.
You watch the destruction and death.
I'm in my house.
I'm doing the live stream shows.
You do the live stream shows.
You send out the emails.
You tell me.
I'm trying to get booked on Zoom.
Book me on Zoom now.
Please book me on your Zoom show.
I would like $50 in Venmo money.
Oh, God.
But rather than having to sell your own tickets,
you're like, well, do you got a Zoom account that you paid for
that can bring at least 100 people to the stream?
It's a bringer Zoom show?
Yeah, a bringer Zoom show.
You know that's like we're a week away from bringer zoom shows for sure oh yeah i what's i'll
tell people what bring what those shows are if they don't know about how okay so a bringer show
is basically it's a grift that uh more established uh comedians will do in whatever town they're in
where they basically rent out the club and rather than book good comedians to try to make a good show you book
like brand new open micers and you say to them who like have families that live locally and stuff so
they can bring everyone they've ever met in their life exactly you basically are are taking advantage
of brand new comedians proximity to their families and friends and saying to them hey you can do my show at this very fancy club uh all you have to do
is bring 30 people you have to sell all 30 tickets to your family and friends i keep 100 of the money
i give you stage time and people are like oh i'm i'm doing a show at the at the comedy store and
it's like are you really like and you're like oh can i get a mention on twitter they're like no you know no no i will pretend in public like i've never met you just basically
it's a multi-level marketing scheme it really is it but with audiences yeah it's pretty it's
pretty genius and uh yeah oh no we're a week away from that being on instagram live what's something that's underrated matt underrated um i think the
like slow dawdling passage of time like i think that it is a marvel to behold that we are still
in the month of march and here are the things that have happened in march pete budaj dropped out just this month uh michael bloomberg was still
in the race like remember when we thought we were pretty sure bernie was gonna win
that was at the beginning of the month that was at the beginning of the month that feels
like years ago and i love it because like i'm always complaining about the fact that like time just goes by so fast and fast it's just like it's like every year it's getting shorter you know what i
mean it's like that pink floyd song about time i think it's called time and it's like it's it's so
nice i think it's so underrated just like the slow passage of time it's just it's beautiful right i love it i
want to pack as much into a single month as we can you know it's relative man time's relative
burning one california this month i came into contact with so many people this month yeah like
when you just think of all the moments like earlier in the month you could have very much gotten covet 19 oh yeah i
was i was like out yeah it's absurd i went door knocking i shook hands yeah same i didn't
sanitize my hands on those door knockings no i never sanitized my hands no like no i mean
i've been doing it now but it's like yeah yeah, the chances that we could have gotten it were very, very high.
And we lucked out in that we didn't.
But also, man, what a month, huh?
Yeah.
Hey, it goes by, baby.
What's something that is overrated?
I mean, I've said this before, but one of the things I think is overrated is the outside world, for sure.
The above ground.
The surface.
The surface.
But I also think being in quarantine with the ones you love is overrated.
Oh, for sure.
Because here's the thing.
I love my girlfriend.
She's wonderful.
She's my favorite person.
And like, but sometimes you just want to be alone.
And it's hard to be alone sometimes when you're stuck inside.
And I think love is overrated too.
Because like, obviously I love her and she loves me back.
And it's a beautiful relationship
but like you know sometimes i just want to not do dishes i don't want to think you know sometimes i
just want to be like alone with my thoughts and trash yeah just be a paper bag blowing in the
wind like i now feel a little bit bad for my parents uh who have been together for
like a million years like they're they're inside all the time even before covid and now i'm like
oh i get it like i get why there's so much friction in this relationship it's just like
you see the person all the time you know because they're both retired like you wake up and that
person's there you go to sleep the person's there you know you go to the kitchen the person's there it's like it's it's a
lot it's a lot are you learning like new skills are both of you learning like new things about
your partners or new ways to interact she knows she knows now how many times a day that i uh that i drop a deuce and i think it's um i think it's wearing
on the uh on the libido i think uh our sexual relationship is probably uh like the worst for it
because i poop so much because i poo a lot i'm a i'm a I got a I'm a very regular a lot of I'm
glad you got that out here yeah I'm glad you got that out here I found it's like uh I I found it
like my my boyfriend is realizing like flaws in me that are glaringly obvious just like I think
he's like he's like I think oh I think he's currently it'll be different it'll change but
right now he's like jamie i think that this
like when you act this way like this is so new to me i can't believe this and i'm like no i've
like been this way you've just never had to witness me on a live feed yeah your entire life
i'm like no this has been a problem i've just been concealing it from you right right and how do you
think we got into a relationship it's all about hiding everything
until the wheels break off and then suddenly you are yourself around that's right i miss my smoke
and mirrors i miss my smoke and mirrors so much yeah because you what you do is like you know
every time you see the person that you're in a relationship with you know you uh you just kind
of like put on airs you know for years, and you see them multiple times a day,
but then as soon as you leave, you go take a shit,
and then you come back, and then you're like, you're you again.
But then when you see someone 24-7, 365,
it's like they're going to know who you really are.
They're like, why do you sniff your hands so much?
Right, right.
Yeah, I mean, I had to become myself pretty quickly in front of Her Majesty.
That way I could be like, that's the only way it's going to last.
I don't have the energy to hide that I need my time to play video games or smoke weed or just listen to music or do whatever, watch soccer.
All those things that typically you're like, no, I can't let that be my whole life or whatever.
But that honesty. Yeah, you got to be real.'t can't let that be my whole life or whatever but you know that honesty and i'm glad i gotta be real i'm getting through that now i'm sure and i know a lot of
people are getting through that phase right now who may not have had that like okay time to see
me yeah hi hello this is me hi you've made a mistake. I've always been this disgusting.
Yes, I do smoke that much weed in one day.
It wasn't a joke the first couple of days.
I spent 10 minutes on the toilet reading Twitter.
I had to tell my boyfriend that I lied to him about having seen Whiplash.
Oh, man.
He took out his Blu-ray.
He's like, what do you think? I don't want i don't want to watch it why did why did you lie about that because i wanted him to think i was not like the
other girls that i saw i was like i am different see Whiplash. All the other girls who aren't interested in a J.K. Simmons drumming coach movie.
I hate it.
I don't want to watch it at all.
Finally, Matt, what's a myth?
What's something that people think is true that you know is just false or vice versa?
I think in general, I think we can all realize that the movie Outbreak, with regards to just all you have to do is find the outbreak monkey and everything will be fine.
I think that myth is now officially busted, especially given the fact I just rewatched Outbreak.
Like everyone?
Just like everyone.
And at the time, it seemed like an honest portrayal of what would happen in a pandemic.
But then you get to the end, and the way that they solve everything is finding the monkey.
And then once they find the monkey, they are able to save Rene Russo's life within a matter of minutes
because they immediately are able to create a vaccine and cure
and then and then at one point justin hoffman is like oh they're pumping gallons of this stuff out
don't worry about it i'm like actually in terms of like our ability to uh you know make like do
mass manufacturing of anything during a time of crisis it seems like we actually nah we don't
have that we don't have that ability you know know, we can't even make the test.
The solution to like sort of head off the outbreak was like, let's just like drop this oxygen sucking bomb on a town.
Yeah.
If it gets bad, man.
I'm absolutely shocked.
Like, how are you both able to watch that movie right now?
It makes me so nervous to
even think about watching an outbreak movie or the same thing like kate winslet matt damon movie
i got so close to watching it contagion oh i can't watch it i don't know oh no yeah i the thing is i
know i used to watch outbreak so much as a child i have a lot of it already sort of just hard-lined
into my brain what i've done is the same thing, though, Jamie,
because on Netflix, it's like, what's trending?
It's like, I guess everyone's fucking watching Outbreak right now
because it always says it's trending.
And I'm like, bro, I don't need that, A, because I remember everything.
We all know Denny was patient zero because he was fucking around with that monkey.
He was sweaty as fuck on that flight.
We all saw how bad his situation was and those other things.
So I just avoid it
and I'll just regress and watch like,
I started watching the last OG,
the second season.
Yeah, it's so good.
I like to laugh.
Okay.
Well, good.
I'm glad we got our myths down and busted.
Before we go on,
let's take a break actually
and then we'll come right back
and discuss some funny things and
some hard things and then more funny things. All right, we'll be back.
This summer, the nation watched as the Republican nominee for president was the target of two
assassination attempts separated by two months.
These events were mirrored nearly 50 years ago when President Gerald Ford faced two attempts on his life in less than three weeks.
President Gerald R. Ford came stunningly close to being the victim of an assassin today.
And these are the only two times we know of that a woman has tried to assassinate a U.S. president.
One was the protege of infamous
cult leader Charles Manson. I always felt like Lynette was kind of his right-hand woman. The
other, a middle-aged housewife working undercover for the FBI in a violent revolutionary underground.
Identified by police as Sarah Jean Moore. The story of one strange and violent summer.
This is Rip Current,
available now with new episodes every Thursday.
Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts,
or wherever you get your podcasts.
I've been thinking about you.
I want you back in my life.
It's too late for that.
I have a proposal for you.
Come up here and document my project. All you need to
do is record everything like you always do. One session, 24 hours. BPM 110, 120. She's terrified.
Should we wake her up? Absolutely not. What was that? You didn't figure it out? I think I need to hear you say it.
That was live audio of a woman's nightmare.
This machine is approved and everything?
You're allowed to be doing this?
We passed the review board a year ago.
We're not hurting people.
There's nothing dangerous about what you're doing.
They're just dreams.
Dream Sequence is a new horror thriller from Blumhouse Television, iHeartRadio, and Realm.
Listen to Dream Sequence on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
Señora Sex Ed is not your mommy sex talk.
This show is la plática like you've never heard it before.
We're breaking the stigma and silence around sex and sexuality in Latinx
communities. This podcast is an intergenerational conversation between Latinas from Gen X to Gen Z.
We're covering everything from body image to representation in film and television.
We even interview iconic Latinas like Puerto Rican actress Ana Ortiz. I felt in control of my own physical body and my own self.
I was on birth control.
I had sort of had my first sexual experience.
If you're in your señora era or know someone who is, then this is the show for you.
We're your hosts, Diosa and Mala, and you might recognize us from our flagship podcast, Locatora Radio.
We're so excited for you to hear our brand new podcast, Señora Sex Ed.
Listen to Señora Sex Ed on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
Do you ever wonder where your favorite foods come from?
Like what's the history behind bacon-wrapped hot dogs?
Hi, I'm Eva Longoria.
Hi, I'm Maite Gomez-Rejon.
Our podcast, Hungry for History, is back.
Season two. Season two.
Are we recording? Are we good?
Oh, we push record, right?
Okay.
And this season, we're taking an even bigger bite
out of the most delicious food and its history.
Saying that the most popular cocktail is the margarita,
followed by the mojito from Cuba,
and the piña colada from Puerto Rico.
So all of these we have, we thank Latin culture.
There's a mention of blood sausage in Homer's Odyssey that dates back to the 9th century B.C.
B.C.?
I didn't realize how old the hot dog was.
Listen to Hungry for History as part of the My Cultura podcast network.
Available on the iHeartRadio app,
Apple Podcasts,
or wherever you get your podcasts.
And we're back.
Let's just check in really quick
with the stock market.
And by the stock market,
I mean the market of celebrity songs
that are coming out of the quarantine.
Because, I mean, right now, it's true to roof right now.
Booming.
Invest while you can.
Did you listen to Jeremy Renner's album, Jamie?
I know we talked about the track when it came out.
Did you listen to the whole album?
Did you give it a listen?
I do think that they chose the right leading single on it.
It's by far the strongest track on the album. No yeah of course i listened to the whole thing i thought it was really um really
bad great really bad really not good uh but i i will uh you'll have to go to my only fans account
where i rub lotion on my feet and give a full review um but but yeah i mean for the preview here uh it is not very good i just i still can't
stop thinking about how on tuesday he refuses to pay alimony and on friday he drops his worst
album yet the medicine bro the the arc is just it's gorgeous sophomore jinx um so john bon jovi It's just gorgeous So John Bon Jovi He
John Bon Jovi had a song called
Do What You Can
That he's like crowd writing
Sort of
Like he's getting the lyrics from other people or what
Yeah so he wants his fans to help him finish it
So he's like here's my idea guys
We write this one together
I'm gonna give you the chorus
I'm gonna give you the first verse I'm going to give you the first verse.
I'm going to play the second verse, but you tell me your story.
Oh, God.
Hello?
Yeah.
I will say, I think that the Bob Dylan song would have been better if he had taken that approach.
Wait, did Bob Dylan do a coronavirus song?
No, he did the JFK assassination song.
Oh.
17-minute epic.
I got to minute 11 over the weekend, which was a new high score.
Wow.
Good for you.
So then later on in his video, he's like, you know, just like kind of put down your
posts with hashtag do what you can.
And then he says, quote, tell me what you're going through.
Tell me what you're feeling.
Tell me if you're going through tell me what you're feeling tell
me if you're hurting so now this guy it's almost brilliant that he's exploiting the pain of regular
people yeah yeah i'm gonna make a lot of money off this song and you're not getting any royalties
and i want to know your pain does that cause you? Is that even worse to know that I'm making money off your tragedy?
It's like Jon Bon Jovi's answer
to XOJane.com.
He's just like,
wait, okay,
worst thing you've ever written,
or worst thing that's ever happened to you,
write an essay about it,
you will not be paid,
you'll be paid in exposure,
and they're-
You'll be paid in exposure to the coronavirus right
i'll come over to your house cough in your mouth yep that's i'm i again so for a week from zoom
zoom bringer shows on the internet how close are we from people saying you will be paying exposure
to covid 19 because that's the only way you can get the government to fucking help you
is that you can verify it because we're gonna and we might incentivize getting sick that's the only way you get the government to fucking help you is that you can verify it
because we're gonna and we might incentivize getting sick that's true i mean at a certain
point like exposure to the virus already there are like thousands of gofundme pages that are
are propping up everywhere because uh yeah so that is good exposure yeah i mean also people will i don't like it that is a scary thought to
me but the the idea that like if the only way that you're going to be able to get rent a rent break
in your area is to get very sick i'm like they're they're you know people reach a point where you're
like yeah sure i'll be sick for a week and a half and then just like roll the dice since the and
then and it's just let's hope it doesn't get to there okay back to
something funny bono is also writing a song uh that is like really i think the bon jovi one if
you look at he's like in a studio like very you know it's kind of composed somewhat uh but the
bono one is like the weirdest phone quality it's like all in his face low angle he's trying to song is it
is it he's not trying to show how big his mansion is is that is that what it is like can you see
the room he's in he's definitely by the sea yeah oh he's by the sea so yeah i'll tell you that much
so if he's gotta fuck off on this is where i live i live right out here near the ocean
just me alone me and the edge we like to play songs this is just how i assume he sounds he's
if you're gonna do it it has to be catorce
jesus doesn't like when you say numbers in english
uno dos tres catorce the song that he's putting out is Let Your Love
Be Known.
He's saying, on the caption,
he's saying, for the Italians who inspired
it, for the Irish, for anyone
who this St. Patrick's Day is in a tight
spot and still singing, for the doctors,
nurses, carers on the front line,
it's you we're singing to.
And then later
on, Will.i am like does a little
puts a little collab energy in it then jennifer hudson and then yoshiki from x japan who most
people do not know who that is unless you're into japanese rock or no japanese bands there was also
a hosier i think that's another Irish artist. You remember Hozier?
He did, take me to church.
Is that it?
Yeah.
He wrote one.
And unfortunately, I don't think anyone even cared.
He did?
Yeah.
Isn't that the most cursed thing of all?
And I'll say it.
I'll say cursed.
Yeah.
Uh-oh.
But yeah.
Curse it.
The saddest thing of all is to release a COVID-19 benefit track that no one ever
knows.
No one cares about.
Yeah.
Especially if you were someone who did have a hit on the radio, you know, to just be like,
right, this is my time, guys.
I'm going to come back.
I'm going to ride this COVID wave all the way to fame and glory again.
And then no one gives a shit.
No one gives a rat's ass.
It's funny.
On Desus and Mero, Desus kind of had shit no one it's funny on uh desus and mero the
desus kind of had this point he's like he's like it just sucks he's like if you're famous during
a pandemic he's like nobody's gonna remember that shit because everything is all about the
pandemic all the news will be about it he's like you they don't fucking you don't talk about like
the most poppin artists in the great depression because that wasn't the most important thing at
the time and he was like yeah yeah so he's like we might not ever be remembered oh you hate to see it don't you okay so let's move on to some
some bullshit out of the trump administration just really quickly this is just top line
yeah let's just let's let's take a deep breath and eat our vegetables really quick uh okay so
he was recently blaming governors,
thieving healthcare workers and hospitals and basically Obama for material shortcomings
and everything else except himself.
Because let's be real,
this man knew what was going on
and just his failure to act
has only exacerbated the situation.
Okay, next point.
He also said that it would be a job well done.
He's like, it'd be a pretty good job if only 100,000 people die because of this pandemic.
So he's already setting the bar at about 100,000 deaths for an A, but who knows if it goes above that, then he may move the goalposts again.
But this is where we're at.
I mean, he already moved the date where he was like i think easter would be great
resurrect the economy resurrect jesus and then now he's like uh april 30th so he's gonna move
that goalpost yeah and i think and it seemed like he was willing to accept that maybe the experts
knew what they were talking about because one part of me was like oh he really might try and do that
and then really make this worse but someone got to him I don't know if it was his children or what. Another point through all this, because I'm sure everyone is
super up on a lot of the scary news that's going on. Please try and limit your news intake every
day because it will definitely help just to maintain your sense of peace. But I just want
to talk about some vulnerable groups who, like with this outbreak,
need to be sort of discussed a little bit more. The first group are prisoners, because a lot of
people have talked about, screamed from the rooftops that our prisons are overcrowded. We
know that because it's a for-profit business and it's like a hotel. You book more guests,
you make more money, or you make more arrests, you get more money. A lot of people have been going on saying a COVID-19 outbreak in a prison would be absolutely awful.
The people are in such confined spaces. It would just be the worst thing to have.
And we've already seen cases pop up in certain prisons.
William Barr at the Department of Justice said that he is having, you know, federal prisons,
Justice said that he is having, you know, federal prisons like giving the order to release sick, elderly or other at risk inmates into home confinement based on an algorithm that is, you guessed it, racist.
And the way it determines who's, you know, a less of a risk to be released.
Basically, it's a computerized system never been used before, but basically says white collar offenders who are most disproportionately white are safe but if you are uh have any drug related charges a history of
prior arrests uh typically who are uh would tend to be african-american uh because of biased police
practices the war on drugs everything what have you uh those you know they'll be they'll be disproportionately
affected so that means 30 of white inmates uh would probably get this low risk uh rating while
only seven percent of black inmates will get this similar designation and this policy also excludes
non-citizens convicted of immigration related crimes so we're looking at just being like hi let's do what we can to ease the prisons but
using a terribly fucked up algorithm and then even an algorithm brown people yeah right it's really
they just open a door that says computer room and it's a guy named algorithm and he's just a racist
uncle who's just like oh let the whites the whites will be fine. And let's just keep all the blacks into it.
Yeah.
And if you're an illegal immigrant, that's also bad.
I mean, it's true.
It's almost like using it like it's only reinforcing a thing that they probably would have done out loud.
So it's easier to claim algorithm like, no, we're using this computer system.
Yeah, it's computers.
Computers are infallible.
It's yeah.
And it's always racist.
And we also know
that like they're still doing like ice raids throughout this time there's like not been a
moratorium on that at all and so it's right yeah yeah um yeah it's a bummer yeah so this is just
one of those things where because of the overcrowding and the you know absolute lack of
compassion shown to the incarcerated population this is something
that could take your check fraud sentence and turn it into a death sentence yeah meanwhile you know
you're looking at how other countries are responding like uh like america's sworn enemy uh
iran and they are releasing prisoners and they've been releasing prisoners for weeks now and uh and it's like you always look at that and you just go
like yeah this is uh they're it's like every every other month the ayatollahs will say something
that'll be like you know i can't lie like i'm i'm kind of more on board with that than i am with
anything that the american government currently says like i i it's yeah when it comes to showing a modicum of humanity
or of anything acknowledging people's humanity you're like that's so weird that like you know
how many people have gotten an email from an insurance company recently that's like hey you
should do this or hey we're worried about you hey we're gonna do this to make shit easier for you
no nowhere yeah so like i think it you know helps i get more emails from like la fitness telling me
like hey you want two free months of workout once this is all done then i do from like blue cross or
etna who are just like no they don't they don't care this is this is going to be a cash cow for
them there's also another group um just with people with like, any kind of neurally atypical people,
there's some kind of troubling plans that are being articulated from states like in Alabama and Washington
about how they will prioritize people who are going to get ventilators from COVID-19-related complications.
And this ProPublica article is showing how a lot of advocacy groups
are sounding an alarm to Health and Human Services,
saying like the wording in this is deeply, deeply fucking problematic
and troubling.
In Alabama, one of their state plans say that, quote,
persons with severe mental retardation, advanced dementia,
or severe traumatic brain injury may be poor candidates for ventilator support.
Another part says that, quote,
Persons with severe or profound mental retardation, moderate to severe dementia, or catastrophic neurological complications such as persistent vegetative state are unlikely candidates for ventilator support. So it's a, like, they're essentially saying, okay, anyone with this kind of mental disability
or super old is,
we'll throw them in the expendable column.
They're fine.
Yeah.
And also like the language that they're using
is so outdated and-
Dated.
Right.
It's just like absurd that,
I don't know,
I guess we're in our liberal bubble over here.
We're in our liberal Zoom chat.
But yeah, the language choices are obviously inexcusable.
And then just the outright prejudice that they're spelling out here is fucked.
It's very much so the response that I would expect from the know the governor of alabama it's like just let's go the most fascist
angle that we possibly can with this outbreak before there's even an outbreak of cases with uh
you know significant numbers like right let's just articulate that out loud so yeah like they
get one call about like about a case of covet and it's like, all right, first, we got to kill all the old people.
And then anyone who's different, yeah, pretty much.
Which just discourages people from seeking care, too.
It's basically spelling out, hey, if this is something that affects you,
don't even bother seeking the care.
Yeah, and I think just to say, though, too, like, how are we also, you know, allowing these plans to be articulated?
We're clearly saying, like, this group of people is completely secondary.
Their needs are secondary to what we will deem as the desirable population or whatever.
It's just really it's really fucking dark.
desirable population or whatever uh it's just really it's really fucking dark and i understand like that there probably is going to become some kind of point where they're looking at
not enough resources for the amount of people who need the resources um but to to go this far it's
like it's just so it's so brutal uh and i feel like you know obviously this this needs to be
something that we we keep an eye on because it just it's oh it's fucking eerie and i feel like you know obviously this this needs to be something that we we keep an eye
on because it just it's oh it's fucking eerie and i asked one of my friends who's a nurse i was like
are are you seeing anything like this in your hospital and they said no and just sort of like
it's just also very they also pointed out how using the term retardation is just so out of
date and just like what completely who would write that into an actual plan um but you
know i think that times that does happen it's uh you know possibly if you are in a persistent
vegetative state that you know that they may ask your family like what what they would want to do
but again these are well uh we're starting to see how how willing states are to be humane to their citizens.
These are choices that clinicians in Italy and I think Spain now have had to make because of just lack of resources like this is it is a thing where there's uh not enough ventilators and like
clinicians are literally making a decision between who to give the ventilator to and who to not give
the ventilator to and a lot of the time you know they'll give it to someone who is younger and they
think has a bigger chance of uh of living whereas they're like we don't want to you know give it to
someone who's old
and vulnerable and then have both of the people die and it's a really messed up decision to have
to make and it's weird to preemptively make that decision right yeah and then articulate it that
way and then also throw in people who are perfectly healthy despite some the idea that anyone with special needs is automatically someone that you
need to euthanize is like it's nazi shit it's straight up nazi shit and and it's like this is
this is a time in america where we're having a lot of mask off nazi people just kind of just being
like well time to do a genocide like like no qualms about it whatsoever.
Yeah, it is like the preemptiveness of just like saying,
hey, just so you know,
if it comes to this,
if this decision comes up,
this is what we're going to do.
It just seems,
it feels like fear mongering too.
Like why would you, yeah.
Just to like articulate
your discriminatory practice up front,
like at a time like this. I guess most people don't write it down
right yeah exactly okay yeah yeah yeah it's it's alarming um okay this one other thing i want to
say about uh especially with like the prison population there was a thing where like governor
cuomo was like yeah you know saying that essentially that there would be some of the
prison population would be working on making
hand sanitizer uh and people are like what the fuck is this because again prison labor is just
essentially slavery uh but like that you know a lot of people are like what the fuck is going on
you know are they you know who's making this and it turns out that like this hand sanitizer isn't really being made by the inmates.
They're actually just bottling it and then putting like someone else has made the sanitizer.
They're bottling it and labeling it.
And a lot of people are like, what the what's the point of this?
Like what?
I don't understand what the everyone's question is.
Is there a need for that?
I don't understand what the everyone's question is.
Is there a need for that?
Obviously like there'll,
I,
you know, I think those prisoners in those,
uh,
facilities are making like $2 an hour basically.
Yeah.
Uh,
but unconscionable,
I don't know what the,
it just seems odd to be like,
yeah.
And like,
look,
we're putting our,
our,
our offenders to work.
You see,
they're not just partying it up,
uh,
behind bars. We're getting them to work. It's just a odd partying it up uh behind bars we're getting
them to work it's just a odd they just want to make everyone uh everyone who needs hand sanitizer
complicit in uh modern day slavery they're just like right we gotta find a way to make them
complicit like literally all over your mind you're in america yeah it's just a fully i mean it's it's
like along the same lines of like the
fact that it's being framed as like look at what we're doing this is good like this is yeah we're
putting these like citizens to work you're like no you're it's just like especially considering
the power of the executive to enact the defense production act and actually get a company to do
it yeah you know a company with employees and they're like well why do we
need to do all that we we got you know all these prisoners who can make it it's like yeah it really
is way cheaper yeah they haven't unionized on us yet yeah you can't you really can't underestimate
like a conservative uh government's ability to pinch pennies uh in times of crisis, you know? Yeah.
Okay.
On to some other news.
Guess which garment is surging in sales right now.
Now, I'm not saying this is unequivocal,
like this is the only one,
but can you have a guess what garment you think is having a real spike,
a real surge right now?
Cute little tank tops.
Okay, how about this?
Easier.
What's a garment that is crashing right now?
What are people not buying right now?
Handkerchiefs?
Wait, a garment, okay.
No, like a main garment.
It's nothing like an accessory.
A main garment.
Pajama pants?
I mean, pants.
Jeans.
No one's wearing jeans.
Pants.
Pants?
Pants are crashing.
If you have stock in pants. Okay, yeah.
Yeah, if you've got stock in pants right now, divest.
Sell.
Sell off all your pants stock right now because a lot of people are seeing just the the pants sales are
bottoming out but people are buying way more shirts for some reason more shirts huh yeah a lot of
people think this is because if you are like someone who has to wear some kind of you know if
you don't dress casually yeah work the zoom era has been like well i don't need to wear fucking
pants because everyone's
seeing me from chest up so i'll just wear like i'll wear these new up top garments so at walmart
they're one of their executive their stores in their online outfit have seen a like a spike as
he calls it in sales of shirts but the pants is just so so so bad the gap same major spikes uh in not only shirts but obviously
comfortable clothing like sweatpants and pajamas uh basically all because we don't have to be seen
from our waist down it's all zoom dude everyone at a board meeting right now is donald ducking
and they don't even know it i love it don Donald Ducking is the best style of nudity.
It's the funniest style of nudity.
Yeah, it's a good reveal.
It's a great reveal.
Yeah, I've been wearing the same pair of pants for, what, three weeks?
Two weeks?
Two weeks.
I was wearing them for about two weeks straight until Francesca saw a, like, I don't know,
saw something on TV or read something that said
that like make sure to change your pants
because of COVID
and I was just like no sweetie
not everything is real
that's fake news that's Russians or something
and then she was like change your pants
no no no that's Russians
come on that's Russian bots
trying to fool you into making...
Trying to get Medicare.
Dude, is the...
I like just the, yeah, you got to change pants.
That's like some lobbying effort from Big Pant right now
because they're doing terribly.
They're like, hey, get the word out, bro.
You got to change pants pretty frequently.
That's exactly what's happening.
It's just like the Levi Strauss company.
Is it Levi Strauss or did I just invent the last like the Levi Strauss company. Is it Levi Strauss?
Or did I just invent the last name?
No, you nailed it.
Yeah, it's all of their lobbyists just being like,
we got to get pants sales up.
Random fact I remember from Levi Strauss,
because it was part of our gold rush education in California,
that they used to call him, rather than Denim,
they were pronounced Denims.
So I don't know if you know that.
I kind of love that random covid fact i think it was it was a bus calb tweet i think where she was just like i
don't mean to trigger anyone but my husband has been wearing jeans every day of the quarantine
and i'm the baby and i are safe and in a second location
i i have noticed that people have been talking a lot of trash about
jeans and i realized in this uh quarantine that i mostly i only really own jeans uh they're not
they're not yeah i know i know everyone just looked at me weird but i do it's true it's like
i i most of the jeans that i have they're like you know different colors
I have a dark blue I have a light blue I have a black uh I even have one pair of white jeans
but like nice all right Andrew WK yeah well you know I like to party but like I I just realized
that like uh just every other type of pant like I don't even know what What's other pants? Corduroy? Corduroy, chinos, khaki.
I get those just fabric-y
pants. I mean, I guess, I don't know
if men wear them as much, but just
flow-y fabric pants. I like flow-y
pants. Oh, yeah, like some nice
harem pant. I think that's not a
problematic term, but
big baggy. Some aunt teaching
yoga pants in her basement.
You know what it is?
If you ever had a friend who went to Thailand or Cambodia on a trip,
they come back with those pants.
And then they never shut up about the trip.
Yeah.
I just don't have any. Also, it's so cheap there.
Everything is so cheap there.
You're just like, oh, no.
I'm vividly envisioning this one specific person.
Do you remember when like, okay, there was the one like rich girl in my school system.
She would like go to like the Bahamas over summer breaks and she would come back with those like hair wraps, the like color hair wraps.
Oh, sure, sure.
She'd come back with four of them and she'd be like, they cost they're like, they look expensive, but
they're so cheap. And you're like,
shut up.
They don't look that expensive. And they're like, everyone's so nice there.
I know it's like really poor there,
but everyone's so nice. It's really great.
Everyone's so nice. I know I haven't
thought about why that might be true.
No. What do you mean they depend on
our tour? Whatever. Just you're a hater.
All right, let's take a quick break from that and we'll be right back.
separated by two months.
These events were mirrored nearly 50 years ago when President Gerald Ford faced two attempts on his life
in less than three weeks.
President Gerald R. Ford came stunningly close
to being the victim of an assassin today.
And these are the only two times we know of
that a woman has tried to assassinate a U.S. president.
One was the protege of infamous cult leader Charles Manson.
I always felt like Lynette was kind of his right-hand woman. The other, a middle-aged housewife working undercover
for the FBI in a violent revolutionary underground. Identified by police as Sarah Jean Moore.
The story of one strange and violent summer. This is Rip Current, available now with new episodes every Thursday.
Listen on the iHeartRadio app,
Apple Podcasts,
or wherever you get your podcasts.
I've been thinking about you.
I want you back in my life.
It's too late for that.
I have a proposal for you.
Come up here and document my project.
All you need to do is record everything like you always do.
One session.
24 hours.
BPM 110.
120.
She's terrified.
Should we wake her up?
Absolutely not.
What was that?
You didn't figure it out?
I think I need to hear you say it.
That was live audio of a woman's nightmare.
This machine is approved and everything?
You're allowed to be doing this?
We passed the review board a year ago.
We're not hurting people.
There's nothing dangerous about what you're doing.
They're just dreams.
Dream Sequence is a new horror thriller from Blumhouse Television, iHeartRadio, and Realm.
Listen to Dream Sequence on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
Hi, everyone. It's me, Katie Couric.
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Do you ever wonder where your favorite foods come from? Like what's the history behind bacon
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Hungry for History, is back. Season two. Season two.
Are we recording? Are we good?
Oh, we push record, right?
And this season, we're taking in a bigger bite
out of the most delicious food and its history.
Saying that the most popular cocktail is the margarita,
followed by the mojito from Cuba,
and the piña colada from Puerto Rico.
So all of these...
We have, we think, Latin culture.
There's a mention of blood sausage in Homer's Odyssey
that dates back to the 9th century B.C.
B.C.?
I didn't realize how old the hot dog was.
Listen to Hungry for History as part of the My Cultura podcast network,
available on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts,
or wherever you get your podcasts.
Okay, and we're back. So let's move on to another group, Fanatics, the company that makes a lot of
baseball uniforms. This is like another company that like at the zero hours, like, all right,
we're switching all this stuff to make emergency masks and gowns because the government has failed to do anything.
And it's just funny. I only bring it up because the photos of like clearly like pinstripe teams like the Phillies or Yankees, like looking at a like a surgical mask that's made of a Yankee uniform or a Phillies uniform is just it warms your heart.
phillies uniform it's just uh it it warms your heart but again uh nice to see a company trying to step in for the government because the corporate corporations are truly our saviors
and i think that they have i love them on social media and i love when they talk to each other
from their accounts when they're friends because it's like so funny i like like when there's synergistic brand engagement.
It just makes me horny and not want to die.
Oh, is that a new COVID horniness for you?
Yeah, that's new.
It's like, oh, synergistic brand engagement.
Oh!
I'm in pain when I get horny.
It's doing a lot, man.
No, Wendy's is talking to Duncan.
I mean, well, do you remember when Sonny D got too sad
and then everyone was like, we care?
Remember when Sonny D was in a tough place?
Was Stakehams also in a weird spot too?
Well, Stakehams went full.
I remember when we talked about Stakehams.
We also fully play into it. But Stakehams went full. I remember when we talked about Stakehams. We also fully play into it.
But Stakehams was the one that was like,
existentially, branding doesn't matter.
I get so depressed.
Sunny D was fully like, I'm going to end it tonight.
Oh, I do remember that.
Sunny D was going to end it.
And then it was like, little Debbie was like,
don't do it.
You have so much value.
And you're
like i need to get out of this place wherever this is i need to get out of it and it's so funny
it's as easy as just putting your phone down it's the most relatable that sunny d has ever been
though yeah no i think people really felt it and uh and i'm like part of me is going like
is this uh some sort of strategic uh you know brand engagement or are
these just social media managers making thirty thousand dollars a year just being like i gotta
no it's like you can't even you're like oh whoops need to switch to my personal account
you can't even you can't even like fault the person doing it it's just the larger looming
fucked up system yeah dude not more than ever it's cursed
do you got some news out of canada jamie i got some news out of canada some nice friendly
canadian news i love some what are they doing um so some nice friendly canadian news is that
the entertainment so there has been i mean and wely, we can't stop talking about it.
We live in a cute little liberal bubble,
but there's a lot of entertainment workers right now
who are completely out of work
because you can't have any sets for anything right now.
Except for web series.
Except,
and animation,
which is,
shout out to all my animation heads.
But in any case,
there's, I mean, obviously anyone anyone like most people who work behind the camera are out of work right now uh canada is paying its
entertainment workers 75 of their lost wages so you know how are they managing to put together a
maniacal scheme like this listen it's they're the hollywood reporter reported it because they need things to
report on right now other than just and i'm sorry is this am i the only person that is really sick
of seeing stories that's like here's a here's a bunch of empty buildings we put our photographer
at risk to send them out to take a picture of empty bill i'm like i don't care okay so the
the article reads um ottawa's latest cash drop for content producers impacted by the COVID-19 crisis will see 75% of the wages paid by entertainment companies subsidized so they can stay in business.
To qualify, locally owned companies must show their revenues have fallen by at least 30% and must keep paying their employees and not lay them off.
So it's not completely, I mean, it's not recovering all lost wages, which is obviously the goal.
But the fact that entertainment workers in Canada are getting any sort, I mean, and the
fact that anyone is getting lost wages.
No, it's incredible.
It's good.
It's really good.
Because this city is, this city right now, oh my God.
This city.
I know, no, it's fucked.
Yeah.
I mean, everywhere is fucked.
Anyway, that's the point.
But it is weird watching like our lovely neighbor to the north
just kind of knock it out of the park when it comes to social safety net stuff.
No one's asking how they're going to pay for it or anything like that.
They're just doing it and helping their citizens.
It seems like a dope place.
You guys, it seems like a pretty dope place to live.
After our live show in Toronto, when I was talking to some Canadians, they're like, dude, look, it's not all that great.
Okay, but it's definitely better than what you got.
But also, the thing we say around here is like, we may have healthcare, but no dental, no mental.
No dental, no mental.
I didn't know that.
They have Groupons for that.
Yeah, I mean.
Oh, yeah.
And then the dentist can sneeze, what, right into your mouth, Jamie?
Isn't that what happened to your Groupon dentist?
The Groupon dentist sneezed into my mouth.
What?
Listen, $50.
Old news.
It's old news.
I do need to.
The problem is she didn't do a good job and she sneezed in my mouth because the problem is starting again.
Anyways.
Oh, I'm so sorry.
I really would love some dental and some mental what can you do yeah dames at this point i'm just like um okay my teeth are
fine you know probably they're probably fine they're good enough if you don't know it's kind
of like the coronavirus test like if i don't go get tested for it then i probably yeah then I'll never know and I'll never have to worry about whatever bill my insurance company sends me.
Same with my teeth.
Teeth are supposed to hurt when you eat.
I know.
Sometimes I'll be eating and I'm like, my teeth feel too thin.
I feel like there should be more.
There's just a little tooth chrysalis and
there's nothing inside of it yeah but that's fine you know like a soft shell crab yeah yeah exactly
like if some if if something puts a little bit too much pressure uh the teeth will just fall out
but that's i mean hey it's fine i mean that's fine that's just uh you know if your teeth do
fall out then you'll
get your double adult teeth will come in through because these are just these are just baby oh do
you get oh we get we're getting an extra set we get an extra thing of teeth nice that's part of
the stimulus package it's part of the stimulus package one of the trillion was spent on new teeth
yeah okay let's uh move on to tiger king um matt you said you started watching it are you fine if we
dive into a little bit of detail about this i'm totally fine with it i i only watch the first 30
minutes because my girlfriend she uh she we got 30 minutes in and she's like i don't like watching
animals you know being trapped in cages and it's i felt i felt that way about don't fuck with cats
i mean i powered through it i'm not a coward well yeah that was straight and i mean it's i haven't
seen much of the show but that was that one was just straight murdering cats this is like you
know they're getting pet and stuff they might be in a cage but i'm with francesca though they
fucked with those animals i so okay uh i have had my thoughts on tiger king have changed over the
weekend in that i now think it is overrated and because only because i re-watched the jinx over
the weekend and i was seeing i i thought that there's maybe a lot of robert durst erasure going
on in the talks we're having about the Tiger King.
And because people are like, oh, Joe Exotic, whatever, best docu-series character ever.
And I'm like, are we just fully forgetting that Robert Durst invented the docu-series character?
And just, you'll run out of love for Tiger King if you rewatch The Jinx.
Robert Durst is like my favorite comedian.
He's so funny.
His burp timing is amazing.
Okay, hold on.
She's in the pocket of Big Durst.
She's paid to go on podcasts to try and bring up Robert Durst.
I see right through this plan.
But I just want to bring up a couple of things.
They post-punched his trial again.
I know. Shame, because we were so close to getting some innocent miles uh but with tiger king i just want to update a couple of things shack had to come out and set the record straight
because he just wants to let everybody know just because i was having a good old time loving on
them little baby tigers okay at. At Joe's exotic,
Joe exotics park.
He does not support him,
even though he was also made an appearance possibly in that reality show in
2014.
He was just saying,
I was just a visitor.
I met the guy,
not my friend.
Don't know him.
Never had any business dealings with him.
I had no idea any of that stuff was going on.
This sounds like the worst kind of excuse ever.
It's just to say that
in one sentence but yeah okay thank you Shaq um and then also um uh a few people brought to our
attention that Saf who's the zookeeper that was mauled and lost his arm is a trans man and was
misgendered throughout the entire series so I wanted to bring that up. I had no idea. We didn't know until after we recorded the episode, yeah.
Yeah, that led me to a thread.
So thank you for people pointing that out.
That led me to a thread from Robert Moore,
who is the guy who made the original podcast
about Joe Exotic.
And he basically was like,
here's some other things you might not know.
He's like, Netflix,
the Netflix version leaves some things out.
Here's some things I wanted to tell people about.
A couple revelations.
One, Joe Exotic does not sing or write any of those songs.
Big surprise, okay?
It's done by another artist.
We all knew that.
I only saw 30 minutes of the show,
but I did watch the song, I Saw a Tiger,
and I was like, that's not fucking him.
That's not his voice.
Especially not when he's talking like this.
I'm gonna sing a song. Yeah not when he's talking like this. I'm going to sing a song.
Yeah.
But he,
apparently what he did was he would just sing softly over the vocal track in
the final mix to give a little bit of exotica to it.
Another thing,
when Joe's cats died,
this is from Robert Moore,
the guy who did the podcast.
He says that a lot of them got sold to this strange bone museum in Oklahoma City.
There's a bone museum?
Yeah, just like a bunch of bones of all kinds of shapes and sizes.
Do they put them together and make a thing?
Or do they just, you're just like, this is the femurs.
This right here.
No, like he's got fully intact, fully intact skellies, dude.
Oh, that's nice.
I love bones. Okay, bones okay sorry i know who knows
what and but they said they don't that place could also be shady another point i love it uh
people who were before really like the show bones came there and went oh damn it i went all the way
to oklahoma at one point during making the podcast this this guy was investigating the fire that happened at the zoo, the very big fire moment.
And he interviewed the case officer at the Winnewood Police Department, this guy Brian Gordon, over the phone.
The next day, Joe Exotic called him angry, basically being he's like, hey, I got a call from this guy at the police department, Brian Gordon, that you were asking about me.
the police department brian gordon that you were asking about me and he said i said joe why is the case officer on the case in which you are a suspect calling you to tell you a reporter is asking
questions about you joe said well he's also my limo driver okay great whatever which was true
so like he was friends with the cop and i think he was later arrested also that guy who worked at the police department there there was another moment where Joe had told people that he was dying from prostate and bone
marrow cancer and he was raising money on his Facebook um from those followers for his expenses
and he had this like really horrific photo that he would that he was showing to basically say
like the state that he was in the guy who did the podcast said that it was actually he had an infected prostate he was
dehydrated and he had a bad herpes outbreak which was why his lips looked like that but it was not
actually cancer this thread goes on i'll post it because there's all kinds of other stuff about
like how a lot of people's houses would just randomly burn down.
Well, we know that Joe Exotic loves to burn down a building.
Yeah.
Loves it.
I can't wait to watch the rest of this series.
Yeah.
It's fun.
It's unbelievable.
It's no jinx, but it's fun.
No durst erasure, I get it. Because, yeah, that one ends so well.
I can't take that away from the jinx.
Dismembered in self-defense, Miles.
Yeah, I know.
And the burps.
Burps iconic.
And the burps.
You know, going to the bathroom and just being like, kill them all, of course.
The greatest admission of guilt ever.
Just old man in a urinal.
I only do that monologue when I'm auditioning for things.
That's why I've never not gotten a part before.
They're like, yeah, Jamie, we asked just for your writer's packet to write on this kid's animation show, but he keeps sending me this MP4 video of you doing a durst you're right of course but you can't imagine there it's like the whole i know though i know the
whole speed it's just uh you should do a tiktok video to that you'll have to go to my only fans
where i douse my foot in mayonnaise and do the robert durst monologue okay well we'll make sure we'll
have that link in bio at the end uh lastly i just want to talk anybody got any good
quarr activities they've done anything new newly discovered uh my my dear friend lizzie cooperman
uh bravely she i i don't know why she had a free Masterclass subscription, but she gifted me a free Masterclass subscription,
and I'm learning all sorts of fucked up stuff.
What are you learning?
You can learn how to be an astronaut on Masterclass.
Damn.
What do you mean learn how to be an astronaut?
I don't know.
I clicked on it, and he's like, want to go to space?
I was like, yes.
And then you watch a 27-minute video.
What they don't tell you about the Masterclasses is they're short. They're very short. I was like, yes. And then you watch a 27-minute video.
What they don't tell you about the masterclasses is they're short.
They're very short.
And then at the end, you download a PDF, you watch a half-hour video,
and they're like, you did it, honey.
You're an astronaut.
They're fun.
I would say if anyone in Zykan can figure out an effective way to steal master classes um or if there's any way i can be helpful to steal because no one should pay
for them they're they're not helpful but they are fun to watch bit torrent all of your master
classes do not actually pay for that stuff for the revolution yeah um okay uh i one thing i saw
pointed out on the internet archive that website internet archive uh you can play like a emulator
for oregon trail you can just play straight up oregon trail um shit is actually a lot harder
than i remember yeah like it's it ain't it ain't a fucking apparently, to get all the way to Oregon. Yeah, dude.
People dying of dysentery left and right.
Broken legs and shit.
How long does that game take to get through?
I was going out pretty quickly because I was high and I was just being super impulsive,
not making the right decision for my family and I.
Well, that's beautiful.
Crossing rivers so recklessly, losing half my fam.
Look, I don't want to talk about it, but it's out there.
You can go wild out on Oregon Trail.
Oh, and again, I can't recommend enough the Portal app.
What's that?
Sorry, I said I can't recommend enough the portal app for your headphones it's
the 3d soundscapes i pretend i'm at the beach every day with my headphones on and just close
my eyes or read and shit it's beautiful that's beautiful and sad i've been uh i bought myself
an oculus uh what do you call oculus quest okay it's like a it's like a, you know, the VR headset.
And yeah, so I've noticed that like even in quarantine,
when you're inside, you could still be outside.
I've been playing this game where you stand on a ledge and then you go fly.
And it's like, it's really fun.
And it's like, you know, you feel like you're outside.
Daniel's wearing his headset right now.
Yeah.
And you're flying you're outside. Daniel's wearing his headset right now. Yeah.
And you're flying amongst the birds.
And also, yeah, VR porn's kind of weird, but it's a thing you can do.
You're never alone.
You're never alone.
You'll never wank alone, as they say in Liverpool.
You'll never wank alone.
You know, I'm just saying.
I mean, what a a dream it's the dream
to jerk off outside sort of oh wait what'd you say nothing oh all right well thank you matt uh
for that update from vr world uh thank you for coming on the show today where can people find
you and follow you and listen to you oh yeah for sure uh thank you for having me uh you can
follow me on instagram at mattlieb jokes uh and i have a podcast uh that i do with vince mancini
it's a sopranos rewatch podcast called pod yourself a gun so if you want to spend your
time in quarantine watching the sopranos and then uh listening to each episode via our podcast,
I suggest you do so.
It's very fun.
Oh, yeah.
It's fun to do.
Anna's been on it.
I've been on it.
Oh, yeah.
Look, if you like Sopranos, just come aboard.
Let's talk some shit.
Jamie, do you like Sopranos?
I've never seen it, but I want to.
Damn it!
All right.
Well, you should.
You have nothing but time now.
It's true. Was there a tweet that you like uh matt anything from the social media you want to share yeah i very much so uh have been enjoying this tweet by um cory booker
some late night writing and this is a screenshots from his notes app we can't touch but we still reach out we
hunker down but we still rise up our bodies are attacked but our spirits fight back the enemy is
invisible but so many of our heroes are now seen weeks and weeks of isolation but still infinite
invincible determination we are distant but
we stand together and together we shall overcome i mean just just really what a what a visionary
and a leader and someone who's saying so much about what he believes in and his determination
and leadership just uh oh it's interesting to see like that come out too
or like sure there are people who are like being like yeah i guess sure some of the music i've
been working on but like the poets now like yeah our poets yeah the covid poets and covid poetry
is going to be its whole its its own genre in the history books of just like people who should have
no they have no business writing poetry doing so.
And yeah, it's a lot of fun.
I feel like Beto O'Rourke's medium posts sort of presaged all of this.
Oh, yeah.
Like those posts felt very like core content.
Yeah.
Beto O'Rourke has been rocking a very general core attitude.
Oh, yeah.
For a while.
He's really ahead of the curve.
I wonder if he's got an indoor skate
park or something that he's
able to keep his moves up
on. He's going to start a band called the Ronas.
I'm all for, I'm like
truly all for unreasonable
quarantine goals.
I love hearing people
be like, yeah, this is it.
We're all going to fail, but we're going to fail as a group yeah we're gonna pretend we tried um jamie yes thank you
for coming along what is uh where can people do all the things to find you follow you listen to
you and what's a tweet you like well uh you can follow me on twitter at Jamie Loftus help. You can follow me on Instagram at Jamie Christ superstar.
I'm going to keep doing the cameos for COVID-19 relief for a bit longer,
but there were a lot of lovely as I gang people who got them and now I have
too many and now I'm scared.
Uh,
I will,
I will still be,
I will still be doing them for a little bit so you can,
uh,
grab those probably through the end
of the week
and all the money goes to
various relief organizations
but right now it's the National
Domestic Workers Union
where everything's going and we've already raised
over $2,000 for it so thank you everybody
Awesome, well done
Tweet I've been liking is
from everyone's favorite uh demi adiju ebay
at electro lemon uh saying thankful now more than ever that i can use my big honking ass
to turn door handles push elevator buttons shake hands etc nice ridiculous. You can find me on Twitter and Instagram at Miles of Grey
and also PlayStation Network Miles of Grey.
And you can find The Daily Zeitgeist on Twitter at Daily Zeitgeist,
Instagram at The Daily Zeitgeist.
We got a website, dailyzeitgeist.com, where we post our episodes and our footnotes.
And let me just tell you a little about some tweets that i'm a like in
um aka aka aka let's see first up uh from devon field at that devon field big cat rescues
volunteer program is built on the ucb model uh this one's from dana donnelly at dana donnelly
it's woke when i date white guys because I make their lives fucking suck.
Another one from Sudi Green at Sudi underscore Green.
Just set my vibrator to kill.
Oh, my goodness.
So, yeah, stay safe out there.
Keep your distance.
Isolate.
You're helping flatten that curve.
And let's just go on.
Let's write out on the song.
Let's do another bit of a jazz rendition of Radiohead.
Just to pretend you're in that coffee shop.
Just pretend you're in a coffee shop.
Oh, there's also an app, too, called...
I've been so into sound apps.
There's an app called Noisley.
N-O-I-S-L-I.
Of course there's an app called Noisley.
But you can just make it sound like a restaurant if you need to.
So you can just play that shit and have ambient crowd sound or whatever.
That's so depressing.
Yeah, that's the saddest thing.
I don't use it.
I don't use that one.
I go to the Rainforest.
I don't use it.
I don't need it.
I actually got my money back
because it's actually way bad.
But you can do it,
but I don't use it.
I would never do that.
I go to nature.
No, I paid money
so I could go to the hillsides of Japan
in my ears.
It's, look, we do what we got to do.
But this is Paranoid Android by the same group.
This is Brad Meldau.
Not the trio, but Brad Meldau.
M-E-H-L-D-A-U.
Check that out and keep on keeping on.
Love, peace, and blessings.
We'll see you later today with some trending.
And then we'll see you tomorrow because that's how it is.
Bye. Bye. see you later today with some trending. And then we'll see you tomorrow because that's how it is. Bye.
Bye.
Love you.
Bye.
Bye. I'm Daphne Caruana Galizia, was a Maltese investigative journalist Thank you. country into a mafia state. Listen to Crooks Everywhere starting September 25th on the
iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Come up here and document my project. All you need to do is record everything like you always do.
What was that?
That was live audio of a woman's nightmare.
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You know, if you've been following me on social media, you know I love to cook,
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