The Daily Zeitgeist - Dark History Of The Oscars, Democrats Also Suck 3.2.18
Episode Date: March 3, 2018In episode 96, Jack & guest co-host Jamie Loftus are joined by comedian Dave Schilling to discuss Dems supporting a shady senate bill, the Oscars weird right wing beginnings, bloidwatch, local sto...ries from listeners, & more! Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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Daphne Caruana Galizia was a Maltese investigative journalist who on October 16th 2017 was assassinated.
Crooks Everywhere unearthed the plot to murder a one-woman WikiLeaks.
She exposed the culture of crime and corruption that were turning her beloved country into a mafia state.
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hard radio app apple podcasts or whatever you stream podcasts oh hello the internet and welcome to season 20 episode 5 of the daily zeitgeist for march what are we gonna call this march 2nd i guess
it's technically the date on earth and my name is not jack o'brien or jack o'brien for that matter
it's miles gray aka gray oh me say gray oh gray light come on me one go home
Thank you so much to Scott Nutting.
I hope that's not a present tense thing.
And your last name on Twitter for that, a.k.a. my man.
Thank you so much because you know how much I love to sing
because I am a guy who didn't get to sing enough as a child
because people told me I had a bad voice, which might be true.
And now I'm rambling on.
But I would like to introduce my very special guest host. I mean, one of a bad voice, which might be true, and now I'm rambling on. But I would like to introduce my very special guest host.
I mean, one of the most prolific guests and just podcast guest in the history of podcasting from what I understand.
Please welcome writer, comedian, mother of leeches, mother of the internet, just general fantastic human being, Jamie Loftus.
Generally a mother.
Hi.
Just a mother. Hi! She's a mother. My name is Jamie Loftus, a.k.a. the first woman to have human Piscean sex, which means
fish.
Thank you.
And the first American woman to lose her virginity to a Zamboni.
All right.
Who was the first woman?
The first woman, I don't know.
She was Swedish.
Ah, so she beat you to that.
Swedes were fucking the Zambonis, but I got there.
Well, look, you're at least a trendsetter in this country.
And in our third seat, we are joined by a guest that is near and dear to my heart.
We have so many overlapping interests.
He's only been on the show once, but we're glad to have him back.
It is comedian, writer, activist, hacktivist, hype beast, father, wrestling aficionado, film aficionado.
I could keep going on.
What other things can I add on?
Sex machine.
Sex machine.
Mr. Dave Schilling.
Hi, Dave.
What's up, man?
How are you?
It's so good to be back here.
I feel like I'm at home right now.
Thank you so much.
Mostly because there's a shower in the bathroom.
Just in case it gets real grimy and sticky on the show.
As you may or may not know, Jack sweats a lot.
So sometimes he needs a post-show shower. Yeah is from like a diaper sweating family yeah oh yeah we talked about this
on when he sweats so much he needs diapies that was his grandfather yeah he put he used to put
diapers in his uh sleeves of his jacket very absorbent that's maybe he's just saying he's
having another kid but he's just needs to explain all the diapers around his house
well we'll not we won't speculate on that.
Dave, just really quickly, you and I are both, we have the really sad distinction of being
Arsenal supporters out in the UK in the English Premier League.
What's that?
It's a team that's really underperforming in a very tragic way.
What sport?
Football or soccer.
Yeah, it's a soccer thing.
Okay.
Kickball.
I'm just going to take a quick nap.
Anyway, we've had back-to-back terrible losses to Manchester City,
and we're in a bit of a crisis as supporters because our old man, Arsene Wenger,
who at one point, yes, he did change the game and brought us to glory.
It's starting to look like, I mean, it's time to go.
You know who else changed the game?
Henry Ford.
Eventually, people stopped driving those cars. Right right and now they drive teslas exactly like i wouldn't be like oh
let me get my model t out and go on the 110 freeway that's ridiculous my dad still drives a
ford focus oh really oh five yeah it's broken though oh five was a good year that is a good
year yeah uh so i mean are there any parallels to this for you for other sports fandoms that you feel like you can relate this to for someone who might not be like – who might not understand sort of where we're at in terms of being Arsenal supporters?
I would say to keep it with teams that I love is the Dodgers with Tommy Lasorda.
Lasorda was probably the greatest manager in L.A. Dodgers history.
Maybe not Brooklyn Dodgers history, but L.A. Dodgers history. Maybe not Brooklyn Dodgers history, but L.A. Dodgers history.
And by the early 90s, he had to go.
As much as people loved him and still love him, at some point you've got to move on.
Yeah, the future we have to think about.
We can't just keep looking back and be like, but remember that?
Remember the Invincible season?
Yeah.
Remember the doubles?
Yeah, it's ridiculous.
I'm not sitting around thinking about, oh, man, remember when you were 17 and you threw up in that Jack in the Box parking lot? Yeah. That was the height of your
coolness. It was. No, man, I've moved on. Well, I haven't. Well, let's get into this. Dave,
what is something that's from your search history that lets people know kind of what you're about
as a human being? I was recently looking up whether or not babies that are four months old
are supposed to make eye contact. Oh, right.
Because you are a new father.
Yeah.
My wife spends a lot of time wondering if he has developmental disabilities.
Oh, because he's not making eye contact?
No, he does.
He just doesn't make enough.
Oh, right.
I think she just wants him to constantly be staring at her.
Like she is looking at him.
Yeah.
Come on.
Well, I'm right here.
I'm right here.
So it's more about her insecurity that her son's not looking at her enough come on well i'm right here so it's more it's more about her insecurity that
her son's not looking at her enough yeah correct and uh and we found that he that that's normal
correct for a child to not be glaring at their parents at four yeah it'd be kind of creepy
he's just like he's got that really tight eye contact where it's like you're at the club and
you see a person that you fancy and you just won't stop staring at them,
you're not going to have any chance to go home with that person.
Right, right, right.
Forget about it.
My son is not going to the club yet, though.
Right.
He can't find enough girls to get in.
Right.
The ratios are fucked up.
The ratios are super fucked.
It's not an age thing.
It's not an age thing.
No, they're like, hey, my man, I will let you in, but your ratio is, man.
Yeah.
You got three girls, only two girls.
Hey, three guys and two girls.
I'm sorry, my man.
Hey, dog.
Age ain't nothing but a number.
Yeah, exactly.
Shouts to Aaliyah.
God, rest in peace, Aaliyah.
Miss her so much.
Dave, what's something that's underrated?
Okay, so I don't watch a lot of TV because I am a father, and we're trying not to have him watch television.
Oh, shout out to all the dads out there.
Yeah, shout out to dads.
You guys are great.
Keep working hard.
Shouts to the moms. You guys do hard. Keep working hard. Shout out to the moms.
You guys do hard work.
We all work hard.
We're all parents.
We're all equal in this world as parents.
I'm a great parent.
You are a great parent, despite your leeches exploding.
Half man, half Zamboni parent.
Wait, how are you – just to sidetrack really quick.
Are your leeches okay?
What's the state of your leeches?
No, they're not okay.
Okay, we'll get back to that in the chamber after the roundup.
They're pretty sick.
My leeches.
Okay, so I'm sorry.
Back to you, Dave.
My leeches are not okay.
So, yeah, we don't let him watch TV, so the TV's never on when he's awake.
Right.
Because it's just, like, he's going to watch too much television when he's five.
Right.
So it's just, like, not right now.
So I have to sneak TV when he's asleep.
So maybe I'll watch one or two things per day.
Right.
So I don't have a lot of time for stuff that's on TV.
Like, I haven't watched Atlanta yet.
Right.
I love Atlanta, but just no time.
The only thing that I watch as an appointment that I have to see as soon as possible is RuPaul's Drag Race.
Oh, okay.
Which is, like, the best show on television.
It's a great show.
By far.
I'm going to RuPaul's Drag Con in May with my wife.
Oh, yeah.
Where is it?
It's at the convention center.
That's so cool.
Yeah.
It's just like, to me, drag queens are funnier than every comedian.
They are the funniest people.
And they give us so much slang.
And people don't realize how much we take from drag culture into mainstream culture, too.
But drag culture also, you could say, you could make the case that drag culture took a lot from black culture.
Yeah, well, I think, yes, of course.
But I think even with things that come into the black vernacular,
like shade and things like that,
there are certain roots that come with drag queens
and then start in the black community
and then, I guess, come out to the rest of the world.
Yeah, I mean, that's just the classic story
is any marginalized group is going to create their own lingo and then the squares, the basics, the squeenies are going to end up stealing that lingo.
But yeah, I use drag queen lingo all the time.
What's your favorite drag queen word?
Oh, boy.
That's a tough one.
I would say that my favorite drag queen word is – oh, jeez.
I had it and then I blanked.
Let me tell you mine.
Okay, you go first.
I like – there are a couple I like.
Getting geeshed.
Getting geeshed to the gods.
Getting your geesh on, like your makeup.
Oh, geesh and stuff.
Yeah, exactly.
But going with the geesh is one of my favorite things.
What else?
Oh, gagging.
Oh, gagging, yes.
That made me gag.
Yeah.
I'm sure that comes from a thing that maybe is more lascivious than I would think.
I don't know.
Maybe I'm going the wrong direction here.
But yeah, when you see something surprising.
Oh, man.
Those new kicks.
I'm gagging.
I'm gagging.
Oh, baby.
Gaggery.
There we go.
Okay.
Now, Dave, what's something that is overrated?
Overrated.
I would say that a thing that is overrated is taking a bath.
Wow.
Hard agree.
I don't think baths are cool.
Hard agree.
Oh, let me light some candles.
Let me put some perfume on and get in the tub and listen to Inya.
Like, that's stupid.
That's whack.
We were thinking a very different bath.
Well, what kind of bath do you take?
You just described like a 90s commercial where like a person.
It's like a dove bar.
For like a sex line.
For a phone.
Like a woman.
Right.
It sounds like a very feminine form of a bath.
Oh, 1-800-RAW-DOG-ME.
That's too many letters.
I just put on perfume and I got in the bath.
Is that necessary?
I was thinking of like, you know what?
It's been a long day.
I'm going to have a bath.
But it's only good for like three minutes.
Well, how hot do you get the water?
And then if you're like, how hot do I, like scalding hot?
It's got to be hot.
Yeah.
Then how cold is your environment where the temperature is dropping that rapidly?
I live outside.
And by that, yeah, you're just –
Well, here's the thing, right?
I get a cup of hot water from Starbucks and I dump it on my head.
It seems to get into that hot-ass bath.
Then your body temperature cools the water down.
Right.
So then it's not scalding anymore.
I have to constantly be running the water to make it super-duper hot again.
Yeah, because you have to be draining.
It's a whole thing.
Well, see, in Japan, the bath culture is it's the only way to bathe.
Like first you sit on a stool and you just wash your body before and get clean.
That is cool.
And then you hop in your bath, which is basically like your in-home hot tub, and you just kick
it in there and relax.
And usually that temperature is maintained like electronically.
So I like that version of a bath.
But I guess, yeah, I see a lot of people who the bath bomb thing I don't get.
I don't like I don't know.
I feel like within 10 minutes, anyone's bath just turns into like stagnant bog water.
And it's just like disgusting because then your dirt's in there.
And now you're like, let me just sit in this.
I feel like I'm like a like a lobster and I'm being boiled.
It's stupid.
Just like the shower is fine.
What's wrong with the shower, fellas or ladies?
Get in that shower.
Get in that shower.
Would you take the time, I guess, now that you're a parent to a young child, do you ever see being like, yeah, I could chill out in a bathtub for a little bit?
Or are you just like, nah, I don't have time.
I got to shower and then I got to keep going.
Yeah, no.
He doesn't seem like he's having a good time at all.
Right.
And he's supposed to like the bath.
Yeah.
You got toys?
What kind of toys you got?
He's not ready for a month.
That's right.
What are you talking about?
I'm thinking in my mind.
No, he's got a little plastic submarine.
No, he can't even grab shit yet.
Right, right.
Four months.
Yeah.
God.
Man, your son has to do better, man.
Yeah.
He can't even get in the club.
Yeah, he can't even get in the club.
I mean, yeah, first handle the ratios, then start playing with toys.
Bath toys.
Walk before you crawl.
Hashtag handle the ratio.
Get it trending.
Get your ratios right.
All right, let's get into it.
Yeah, so you know what we do over here.
We like to take a sample of what the world is thinking and talking about.
Yes, the world, because I will get to some of your local stories at the end.
Thank you so much, by the way.
So please stick around to the end so I can touch on that and give you an update on some of the local stories you guys hit me with.
But to start off, I always like to ask the guests,
Dave, what's a myth that
people believe that you just know is not true?
Bust it. You know what we were just
talking about? Coconut LaCroix being bad.
I don't know if we talked about this the last time I was
on here, but... We did, I think. I don't know.
We've talked. I've definitely talked about this. It's still a myth
that needs to be busted. It's
fine. What's the problem with coconut flavor?
Why are you hating on coconut flavor?
I like coconut LaCroix.
I also recently hated myself for even consuming LaCroix and then I just had to lean into it and be like, you know what?
It's everywhere.
What was the self-hate about?
I felt like I betrayed my region somehow by being like, oh, I drink LaCroix now.
What's your region?
My region? I used to drink polar seltzer. Clos now. What's your region? My region?
I used to drink Polar Seltzer.
Oh, yeah.
That's big East Coast stuff.
Yeah.
And there, they're like, Le Clos is, what are you, French?
As my dad's favorite catchphrase when he sees something written in cursive.
What is this, France?
Fuck you, dad.
I'm French now.
Yeah.
The favorite American insult to anything?
What is this, French?
Yeah.
Give up like the French. Yeah. The favorite American insult to anything? What is this, French? Yeah.
Give up, like, the French?
Yeah, the last thing, yeah, the last insult he learned was in, like, 2002.
It was like, what is this, France?
He still calls Starbucks France.
It's like, anytime I'm like, I'm in a Starbucks, he's like, why are you French now?
Oh, because you should be in a Dunkin'? Because I should be in a Dunkin', exactly.
Does that make, like, coffee bean Switzerland?
Like, I can go there and it's, like neutral yeah or lichtenstein yeah i can get diplomatic community
at this coffee shop i agree uh coconut la croix it gets such a bad rap it does it's unnecessary
yeah well see in the beginning i was disgusted by it because the first thing i thought when i
was eating like suntan lotion like it just felt chemically coconut. And then I realized though, I do love like mounds and stuff like that.
I really like coconut flavor.
So then one day I was so parched and the only thing that was in the fridge was a coconut
LaCroix and I drank it so quickly that I like got through the barrier where I was like,
no, now I love it.
It was weird before just my first sample was not, was not, I got one more thing.
Another myth.
Okay.
Uh, there's nothing wrong with a finger in the butt oh okay
you guys agree?
trying something new?
it always has to be that way
otherwise I just can't get sexually aroused
just getting plugged a little bit
I'm just trying to upset my wife
here's the thing
I've never actually had an orgasm with you before
i'm this is a cry for help yeah i blindfold her and it's like a turkey baster in her vagina and
that's how we had our baby because i just can't i can't finish without the finger in the butt
we're learning something new every day and we'll we'll we'll keep this episode so your son can hear
this too so he well yeah i mean podcasts will be around after the nuclear holocaust.
Well, yeah.
What we do is we convert everything to vinyl.
So even if the digital records are wiped, we can still put an old phonograph on and we'll hand crank it.
You can hear it.
We've got backups like in Blade Runner 2.
All right.
So also now for our first story, Jamie, I want to talk about you because you're a hot topic of conversation around these parts.
I am the story today today you are the story um guys if you don't know if you follow us on social media
at hamburger phone is jamie loftus's twitter handle and it's a fucking amazing twitter account
and then during the olympics some shit went down and you have basically been banished shed from
twitter at the moment i've been suspended indefinitely from Twitter.com.
So you were using footage from the Olympics and cutting – like just explain everybody your predicament.
So I was making these goofy little videos.
I got very into figure skating this round because I am a basic loser.
I saw Itania 500 times.
But I was watching all the figure skating.
And so what I did was I downloaded videos of figure skaters, Adam Rippon, Mariam Nagasu, whatever.
And I would sub out their music with music from like audio books.
Right.
Or I had one.
My favorite one was Alan Arkin's acceptance speech to Little Miss Sunshine.
I was like, wow, that's so crazy.
This Russian skater skated to this Oscar acceptance speech.
And it was like I thought it was funny.
Just a little bit, yeah.
Yeah, it was a bit.
People seemed to like it.
And I did that for like I think like three or four days.
And then I woke up one morning and my account had been suspended.
And I was trying to figure out what it was and went into my email.
But it was and went into my email and I had – the IOC had – International Olympics Committee had filed six different complaints against me.
Jesus.
Like six separate ones.
Right.
And so I was going through them because they were very long messages.
And they basically – they're like, you jacked our shit.
And I still think this is fair use um it's parody yeah exactly i went to
a state school so i know nothing about copyright law but that strikes me as parody i i think so
and then i've done research about it since and i i think i have a decent case well fair use is such
a weird thing to argue in court like it's that's why so many lawyers that only have corporate gigs
making content they just don't even want to get in here. Like they're like, we don't like to use a fair use argument ever.
Just avoid it at all costs or whatever.
And the IOC has like a vice grip on everything.
It's bad.
Basically, they were like, we need you to send us six different apologies and then maybe we'll retract our.
So they asked for individual apologies.
Twitter also asked me to send them an apology.
And so I sent out seven apologies, heard nothing.
And then I tried – Twitter had this thing for a while where it wouldn't look like my account was suspended.
It would say that I was blocking people individually.
And so then I filed another one.
I was like, what's happening?
Is there like any, how do I know when it's going to be lifted?
And they were like, well, we're not going to lift your suspension until the IOC retracts
their complaints and they won't retract the complaints.
So I'm stuck.
Wow.
I'm truly stuck.
I think that's a blessing in disguise.
First of all, you don't have to be on Twitter anymore.
But number two, this is like a movie.
I know you've got Santa University is your thing.
It's true.
Which we're looking forward to this Sunday at the Oscars.
Here's another movie you could write.
IOC versus Jamie.
Yeah, you speaking at the Supreme Court defending your right to put Alan Arkin's acceptance speech on some figure skating videos.
Alan Arkin will be there.
I think it's fine.
It would be a really great cameo.
All these character witnesses come to support you.
I mean, because they have fucking Nazis on there,
and they want to come at you because you fucking had some fun with an IOC video.
Like, it just doesn't come on the front lines.
How many dudes in the IOC are actual former Nazis?
Right.
Or current Nazis.
Or current, right?
Exactly.
And so you apologize, and now they're like, fuck it.
They're just ghosting you.
The IOC entirely ghosted me.
I keep trying to call them, but I can't figure out what country they're in.
And so they're like, we're closed.
I was like, okay.
And then I was like, maybe when the Olympics is over, it'll get easier to contact them.
They will not contact me.
But I'm going to keep – I don't know.
Is there anything we can do?
A petition.
Is there an email address
that we can just spam?
There is, yeah.
Or not spam.
I don't know if you want to go,
if you want to take it there,
but we can put this out there.
I don't have anything to lose.
National Olympic Committee
at hotmail.com.
Yeah.
IOC.
It's kind of complicated.
I had to give them incident numbers,
but the email I had to keep sending my apologies to that have not responded is operations at friendmts.com.
What is friendmts?
I don't know.
Are you dealing with the IOC?
Are you sure?
Yeah.
They're like, we also need your social security number.
I know a Serbian prince who has $5 million in a Swiss bank account.
And now I need a bank account and sort code.
It's dark, man.
And I've had that account since I was a sophomore in high school.
Okay, we've got to figure something out.
Well, this is an ongoing saga.
It is.
Another thing I want to quickly update people on is if you remember one of the last episodes you were on,
you had an ongoing back and forth with a man named Solole Sauce on Facebook who was getting weird in the comments.
You called him out, and then it was like a Venmo war back and forth.
He was giving you money.
You were giving him money.
I accidentally gave him money.
Now, where are you at with him?
Because I know he was like, all right, I'm done being on social media.
But have you made peace?
Swole Sauce and I, I mean, I feel like we're at it.
There's detente right now because Swell Sauce was getting – so yeah, I accidentally Venmoed him $40 when I thought he was Venmoing me $40.
He gave my $40 back and then we negotiated it down.
He ended up Venmoing me $20.
For insulting your appearance on a Facebook comment.
Well, yeah.
Or commenting on it.
Is she hot or not and starting a very triggering debate.
Anyways, so Swole Sauce is now coming to my show in New York a week from Monday.
Oh, whoa.
And we're going to meet IRL.
Yo, so if anybody's in New York, where can they see you there at your New York show?
Oh, Union Hall, March 9th.
I'll be doing a show there.
And Swole Sauce.
A week from today.
A week from today, yeah.
Okay, Swole Sauce is opening for you? Swole today, yeah. Swole Sauce is opening for you?
Swole Sauce, yeah.
Swole Sauce and I are going to do a little soft shoe
to open the show.
Nice.
I don't know.
If he's not actually Swole or Sauce.
Yeah, what are you going to do?
I'll leave.
I'll walk.
Well, we'll wait and see.
I'm so intrigued that I feel like I need to get on a plane for this.
Yeah.
I want to see it.
I will use mileage to go to see this.
What's going to happen?
I don't know.
Well, we'll check in with you.
I bet he's really short.
We'll see.
Well, hey, look, we don't know.
We'll know when we know.
We'll know.
All right, with that, let's take a quick break
and we'll be right back.
Daphne Caruana Galizia was a Maltese investigative journalist
who on October 16th, 2017, was murdered.
There are crooks everywhere you look now. The situation is desperate.
My name is Manuel Delia. I am one of the hosts of Crooks Everywhere, a podcast that unhurts the plot to murder a one-woman Wikileaks.
Daphne exposed the culture of crime and corruption
that were turning her beloved country into a mafia state.
And she paid the ultimate price.
Listen to Crooks everywhere on the iHeartRadio app,
Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
or wherever you get your podcasts.
Hey, I'm Gianna Pradente.
And I'm Jimei Jackson-Gadsden.
We're the hosts of Let's Talk Offline,
a new podcast from LinkedIn News and iHeart Podcasts.
When you're just starting out in your career,
you have a lot of questions,
like how do I speak up when I'm feeling overwhelmed?
Or can I negotiate a higher salary if this is my first real job?
Girl, yes.
Each week, we answer your unfiltered work questions.
Think of us as your work besties
you can turn to for advice.
And if we don't know the answer,
we bring in experts who do,
like resume specialist Morgan Saner.
The only difference between the person
who doesn't get the job between the person who doesn't
get the job and the person who gets the job is usually who applies. Yeah, I think a lot about
that quote. What is it like you miss 100% of the shots you never take? Yeah, rejection is scary,
but it's better than you rejecting yourself. Together, we'll share what it really takes to
thrive in the early years of your career without sacrificing your sanity or sleep.
of your career without sacrificing your sanity or sleep.
Listen to Let's Talk Offline on the iHeartRadio app,
Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
I've been thinking about you.
I want you back in my life.
It's too late for that.
I have a proposal for you.
Come up here and document my project.
All you need to do is record everything like you always do.
One session.
24 hours.
BPM 110.
120.
She's terrified.
Should we wake her up?
Absolutely not.
What was that?
You didn't figure it out?
I think I need to hear you say it.
That was live audio of a woman's nightmare.
This machine is approved and everything?
You're allowed to be doing this?
We passed the review board a year ago.
We're not hurting people.
There's nothing dangerous about what you're doing.
They're just dreams.
Dream Sequence is a new horror thriller from Blumhouse Television, iHeartRadio, and Realm.
Listen to Dream Sequence on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
Hello, everyone. I am Lacey Lamar.
And I'm Amber Ruffin, a better Lacey Lamar.
Boo.
Okay, everybody, we have exciting news to share.
We're back with Season 2 of the Amber and Lacey, Lacey and Amber show on Will Ferrell's Big Money Players Network.
You thought you had fun last season?
Well, you were right.
And you should tune in today for new fun segments like Sister Court and listening to Lacey's steamy DMs.
We've got new and exciting guests like Michael Beach.
That's my husband.
Daphne Spring.
Daniel Thrasher.
Peppermint.
Morgan Jay. and more.
You got to watch us.
No, you mean you have to listen to us.
I mean, you can still watch us, but you got to listen.
Like, if you're watching us, you have to tell us.
Like, if you're out the window, you have to say,
hey, I'm watching you outside of the window.
Just, you know what?
Listen to the Amber and Lacey, Lacey and Amber show
on Will Ferrell's Big Money Players Network,
on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts,
or wherever you get your podcasts.
And we are back.
Now, I know the last, you know, obviously on this show, we talk a lot about the fuckery that goes on with the GOP and Republicans in general.
But today I need to I need to put the spotlight on some Democrats because a lot of these Democrats
ain't shit.
And let's remember that because politics in this country is so fucking just, it's just
off and disheartening.
But this one in particular is just very sad or I don't know, par for the course.
Because if you remember Tim Kaine, the senator from Virginia who ran with Hillary Clinton, yeah, VP Nam, you know, he was a, you know, he always touted his experience as
being a civil rights lawyer or attorney and also, you know, helping people of color who were
searching for home loans, but were facing discriminatory practices, like saying he helped
them. Well, now he is kind of just being one of those regular Democrats that's just caping for the banks because now he's one of 12 Democrats who's sponsoring a Senate bill that will deliberately basically undermine the government's ability to enforce laws against racial discrimination in the housing market. would block the CFPB, the Consumer Financial Protection Bureau, from just basically gathering
data that shows when and where families of color are being overcharged for home loans
or steered into predatory products.
Because most people, especially like there was a study in 2016 from the National Bureau
of Economic Research, it found that Hispanic Americans are 78% more likely to be given
a high-cost mortgage and black Americans are 105% more likely to face that kind of shit.
Oh, my God.
Which is basically – it's like redlining, essentially.
And if you don't know what redlining is, we'll probably have to do a show about that.
But just look that up because that's sort of how we were segregating people after we were sort of integrated, so to speak, in this country so i guess now it's just very disheartening because the when you look
at these numbers this data it basically helps keep banks honest uh from discriminating people
who are just trying to get home loans and again it's just for people like uh tim kaine who are
coming out saying like oh yeah well i'm the civil rights attorney to just go back and then support
a bill like this it's kind of stupid now this Now, this bill isn't specific to this thing.
It's part of a much bigger deregulation bill.
But again, we don't need deregulation when it comes to the banks at all, in my opinion.
And that's me.
I'm not an economist.
I'm just some angry dude with a podcast.
Anyway, I want to throw that out there.
Time out.
Are you saying banks are not honest?
Well, God, don't corner me in the hot take.
I love the banks. I love the banks. I love the banks corner me in the hot take. I love the banks.
I love the banks.
I love the banks.
I love the IOC.
I love the banks.
I'm chilling for the banks.
Here's the thing, okay?
Banks are some of my best friends.
I invited a bank to my wedding.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Chase Bank came.
Yeah.
Chase was your best man.
They sponsored the wedding.
Dave and Maddie's wedding sponsored by Chase.
It's just like Madison Square Garden. And then you guys left in a wells fargo uh no man we're not we're not crossing
brands when that shit's branded it's brand jp morgan holy homie that's right that's what i'm
rocking right now yeah but i guess again i just i think it's important to bring up because it's
very easy like comparatively to think that oh democrats are great or whatever no like this
country is still very fucked up and we have many problems beyond what's going on in the White House.
And I just want to call a couple people out by name because many of our listeners live all across the country.
It's not just Tim Kaine.
It's Michael Bennett in Colorado.
It's Tom Carper in Delaware.
It's Chris Coons in Delaware.
We shouldn't be surprised by the people from Delaware.
Chris Coons.
First of all, that name is wrong.
He needs to change that name.
Joe Donnelly in Indiana.
Heidi Heitkamp, North Dakota.
Doug Jones in Alabama.
Obviously, Tim Kaine.
Angus King in Maine.
Joe Manchin in West Virginia.
Claire McCaskill.
I'm surprised.
Come on, Claire.
Gary Peters in Michigan.
John Tester in Montana.
And Mark Warner in Virginia.
So, guys, please reach out to your senators if you live in those states because this doesn't help anybody.
And I can't imagine.
I mean, I don't know the history of this particular law at all, but I can't imagine how hard it must have been to pass in the first place.
I'd imagine that things like this were probably – maybe have come – I don't know when exactly they implemented this.
I mean if it's the CFPB, it was probably sometime around the financial collapse.
But again, yeah, I don't – I really I'm failed to see what the benefit is in this.
And like when they asked Tim Cain's like office, they're like, well, you know, he's trying
to help smaller lenders, like not talking about this point specifically, even though
the question was about that.
And then they pivoted to be like, well, you know, Tim Cain has always fought for working
people and was a civil rights attorney.
It's like, that doesn't mean shit.
Tim Cain, I mean, it's, it's weird.
Cause Tim Cain does have like, his look is very much like, I know I look like every bad person you've ever met, but actually I am good.
I look like a JCPenney polo shirt model.
First of all, Dad, Doug Jones.
Everybody was so stoked that Doug Jones won in Alabama, but he's still from Alabama.
Yeah, he has to basically
vote like a republican yeah so it's like he's not going to vote across party lines on everything
this is not not going to happen a lot of these people are red state i mean not a lot but there
are many red state democrats on there like joe manchin obviously and and uh john tester and
things like that they have their you can understand because they've always had to slightly vote that
way because re-election guys they're're only – they want to stay in office.
I would be remiss to not mention that Doug Jones is the name of the actor who plays the fish from the shape of water.
That's right.
I had to say it.
Oh, wow.
Your Piscean obsession.
Yeah, my Piscean tryst.
There's a good Doug Jones and a bad Doug Jones.
The good Doug Jones has a fish's ass.
Do not call him.
Leave him alone.
Call Doug Jones in Alabama.
Call Senator Doug Jones.
Who's fucking up.
Yeah, who beat Roy Moore.
I just have to look out for my boyfriend.
I hear you.
My boyfriend, the fish's butt.
No, I appreciate that because it's all about protecting the innocent.
Also, Tim Kaine saying I'm a civil rights attorney and here are all the things I've done before.
It's like Dwayne Wade saying, well, you know, I used to score 20 points a game.
Right.
But not anymore.
Yeah.
I used to.
It's like Arsene Wenger.
Yeah, exactly.
Anyway, let's move on.
Because, guys, speaking of Doug Jones and the Honorable Doug Jones, who is the fish man.
The fish's ass.
The fish's ass.
The Oscars are this Sunday, I guess.
Have you heard of this?
Perfect transition.
Yeah.
Have you heard of this?
Yeah.
Have you guys heard about this?
The Oscars?
That was Jay Leno.
That was a terrible Jay Leno.
I thought you were doing Sandler.
Hey, guys.
Hey, guys.
Oh, no.
This is him. Oh, God. Hey, guys. Oh, no. This is him.
Oh, God.
The hand motion.
Yeah.
Anyway.
It's an ASMR video.
God.
And you can hear my dry mouth.
So the Oscars are coming up this Sunday.
And I know you guys are very big film buffs.
You especially are obsessed with one film.
Your obsessions this year are the shape of water and
mostly i tanya i tanya i've seen nine times nine times now nine times now one time for every time
uh 50 cent has been shot oh wow yeah i think it would be tight if there was a movie about a figure
skating fish person there bash up wow that would be yeah they don't get directly for me these ideas
i'm like just email that to me only.
Don't bother putting them there.
All right, scrap Santa University.
People are listening to this show.
I fish you.
So the Oscars are happening, and our writer, J.M. McNabb,
he pointed out the sort of right-wingish, kind of creepy history of the Oscars in general
because the Oscars were started by Louis B. Mayer,
who was the head of MGM at the time.
And he kind of started it for very weird reasons.
First of all, Louis B. Mayer is a very controversial figure.
He is a pervert.
He's like an old school Hollywood pervert.
For example, at one point,
there was an actress who refused his crude advances and she later married an agent.
So guess what he did?
He banned her husband and all of his clients from ever being in a film in his studio because he's like the OG Harvey Weinstein, I guess.
And he's also reportedly groped a teenage Judy Garland while she was making Wizard of Oz. And like drugged children, you know, like insisted that children be drugged and overworked.
And yeah.
Right.
So now let's get to what the Oscars have.
And so this man, it all kind of started with him wanting to make a beach house.
Like he really wanted to build a beach house and he was just such a cheap asshole.
He basically had the idea to get like the set builders from MGM to build a
real house instead of like a set.
And like the logic was like,
Hey,
you know,
like there's a quote here from the daughter.
His daughter,
Irene was like,
sort of like when we need a set at the studio,
we build it overnight.
We need a big village.
We build it in weeks.
You know,
don't be at the mercy of those contracts.
Don't start with the architects with us.
It's business.
It gets done.
I'll talk to the people at the studio.
And their logic was, well, if they can build a fake house real quick, then let's just do this real one.
And then as it was happening, it turned out the crew, the set builders union, like the deal that they had meant it would actually be like way more expensive to do like an outside job that wasn't particularly pertaining to a motion picture production. So that basically rubbed him the wrong way.
And Mayer got really freaked out about film industry workers unionizing.
Oh, really?
So in a measure to sort of stave off like the unionization of directors and actors and writers.
Yeah.
Mayer created the Academy.
So, yes.
So now this gave him a lot more control because it was supposed to be like this sort of
impartial body like he sort of came up to like actors and directors writers technicians and
producers like yo if you can like sign on as an academy member we're going to improve working
conditions and you're going to be part of an elite organization sort of like go around them
unionizing but there's no way this was going to be impartial because it's basically only looking out for the studios.
So it slogged on and delayed a lot of serious labor negotiations in Hollywood for years.
And so this strategy, like not surprisingly, was fully endorsed by the communist hating Republicans at the time who did everything they could to basically just support this academy.
they could to basically just support this academy uh basically later on mayor said that the best way to handle filmmakers was just to hang medals all over them so this is like this is a quote from him
at the time he said i found that the best way to handle movie makers was to hang medals all over
them if i got them cups and awards they'd kill themselves to produce what i wanted that's why
the academy award was created that That tracks. Yeah, exactly.
As someone who has been to the Academy Award ceremony before, that's the most overrated thing is the Oscars.
The Oscars are – Boring?
Boring, number one.
They're really long.
You're in these little tiny theater seats all night.
They ply you with alcohol to make you forget what you're watching.
I love this. They just you with alcohol to make you forget what you're watching. I love this.
They just give you free drinks.
Wait, do you have to go into the lobby to get alcohol? Here's the deal. Let me give you the skinny
on the Oscar.
Let me peel back the...
The shilling's exclusive.
The shill's exclusive.
I was up in the nosebleeds
with all the rich
farmers and people who give out free suits and stuff.
I was like, oh, yeah, no, I work for a beverage company and I sell beverages and I'm friends with someone and I got free tickets to the Oscars.
What a fun time.
I'm from Nebraska.
So you go up, you get in your seat, and then you come out to get drinks.
There are bars on every level of the Dolby Theater.
But the real shitty part about it is that you can only go out and then come back in during the commercials.
Even though I'm not on camera at all.
I'm too high to ever be seen.
Right.
They lock the doors During the ceremony So you have
A minute and a half
Two minutes
To get out
Get a drink
Right
Drink it and go back
Yeah
That's the same as the Golden Globes
Or to use the bathroom
Right right
Like if
I missed
All of the
The Spectre song
Was it Sam Smith
Oh really
Like the
I was so excited to see that
Because I'm a big James Bond guy
Missed the whole thing Because I took too long taking a leak and they locked me out of the
ceremony that was like me missing oprah's speech at the golden globe because i was at the bar and
they closed the doors and i was like oh shit why do they close the doors because i think it just
for production purposes it's like you know they're locking it up and it's easier to get a lot of
award show privilege at this table i might as. I might as well be on the street watching the show on closed circuit television because you can't see me.
So let me go as I please.
Right.
And again, I was at the Golden Globes because of my mother, okay?
Not because I earned it.
Listen, if anyone ever wants to invite me to something, I'll show up.
I'll stand outside a door.
I'll wait outside.
I'll do what it takes. Maybe next year
we'll go to the Golden Globes.
If someone's going to give me a free PBR, I'll show up.
I'll go wherever.
There's no PBR at the Oscars, unfortunately.
I'll stand, come in, that's how I'm usually paid.
I'm very used to receiving PBR
instead of money.
They don't even have coconut LaCroix
for that.
It's subpar, the conditions for the people there.
The real question is, is Alfred Molina invited to the Oscars even though he did not participate in Good Movie this year?
Yeah, well, I think he should be.
You were sitting near him at the Golden Globes.
I was.
And I wanted to creep him out on your behalf and I was like, he won't get what I'm trying to do and I'll just look weird.
But just to sort of wrap up this story about the Oscars.
So basically they knew that this whole Oscar thing was a sort of a sham and they started unionizing anyway.
But they were actually, because as the Oscars got more and more popular, it got sort of a little bit away from Louis B. Mayer.
And the unions could actually make a moment out of refusing to go to protest their working conditions.
So by around the 30s, it began to backfire on him.
And so in a way, it actually helped strengthen the unions later on.
And now we have the many, you know, the SAGs and the WGAs and DGAs, what have you, PGAs,
all those guilds and unions.
Thanks to this first move.
There's a really interesting podcast about it on Battleship Retention that we'll link
to that you can also listen to. But anyway so yes has a very dark uh past clearly like i mean
if hollywood is bad now can you imagine what it was like 90 years ago if you do any deep dive on
louis b maire there's so much stuff yeah it's funny like even the the biography and the biography
special starts off as like he was like he made made Hollywood. Then the second point was like, it was
filled with abuse and manipulation
and you're like, oh god.
Louis B. Mayer's terrifying fuck
pun. It was just
awful. So guys,
getting to the Oscars at present, I just
want to, I know since you guys love the Oscars,
I just want to throw it to y'all.
Any predictions, anything you want
to see? Like the red carpet will be something because I know there will be the Me Too.
People are planning some kind of moment.
I don't know exactly what it is.
But also the other topic is Ryan Seacrest being on the carpet because the allegations were a little more specific now.
That his stylist was making up that he was grinding his erect penis against her while clad only in his underwear,
groping her vagina, and at one point slapping her buttocks so hard it left a large welt.
It is.
I mean, we were talking about this before.
The fact that language and descriptions like that are so normalized now,
like even in the past couple of months where it's like every single day you're encountering a pretty explicit description of something like that. It's just, I mean, it's good that we are.
It's just interesting that it has become normal.
Because if you saw language like this even a year ago, you'd be like, holy shit.
And this is sort of a story that I think is like kind of flying under the radar.
There's been so many.
So much.
I think most people in America, maybe not in Los Angeles, but most people across the country thought, isn't he gay?
Yeah.
Isn't Ryan Seacrest gay?
That's the weird assumption a lot of people make.
I think Jennifer Lawrence, like she said when she was asked about him, she's like, honestly, I can't even picture him being sexual.
People just have this really interesting perception of him because he's such a host-like guy that you don't even know if he's a human, even whether or not he –
I get the vibe from him like a Ken doll, like a guy that you don't even know if he's a human even like whether or not you know you i
get the vibe from him like a ken doll like a smooth yeah like does he even have a penis a
smooth lump that maybe gets hot i think he's i think he's a hosting cyborg created by fox or
whatever network shit him out up next i'm going to slap your buttocks so hard that it makes a
well tune in oh your programming is off uh so predictions guys are you
looking forward to any awards specifically dave uh you know as a black man in america
very excited about darkest hour
because i haven't seen it but i assume there's a lot of black people in it because of the title
um so i'm rooting for that to win. Other than that, you know what?
I'm going to be on a plane.
Oh, you are?
Yeah.
I have to go to Seattle tomorrow and I'll be coming back Sunday night.
And so I'll be watching the entire thing in an airplane.
I have not watched the Oscars since I went.
Last year, I was watching it in a bar, a pinball bar in New York.
Okay.
And I was furiously tweeting because you got to get those likes.
Right.
Yeah.
I mean, you won't be, but I will be.
Ring the alarm.
Ring the alarm.
I really enjoyed live tweeting the Oscars last year.
Just do it from Bechtelcast.
Well, I'll be doing stand-up comedy in Indianapolis.
Oh, so you won't even know what happens with I, Tonya, your favorite.
I mean, it's going to be – it's not going to get anything.
But that's because the world is mean and we got to give it to three Bilbies.
I'm holding out for three Bilbies.
I hate it.
I have started rating things of like – what would you give that on a scale of one to three
Billboards?
Oh, that's a three B for sure.
That's a three Bill B.
Bill B. Baggins.
Come to my award show, the Bill B.
I won all three Bill Bs this year.
I had a great year.
The Bill B started off wonderful
and then it got real racist at the end.
Yeah, fuck that movie.
I will say about I, Tonya,
there are 10 spots.
You can nominate up to 10 movies for Best Picture every year.
Nine were used this year.
I, Tonya was not nominated.
I think that sucks.
The Post, Darkest Hour.
First of all, I don't understand what this prevalent thought in Hollywood is.
If we don't make a movie about Britain during World War II, if we don't make 40 of those movies a year, we have to shut it down.
We can't.
The whole thing falls apart.
Also, Gary Oldman, which I can't say it enough, hit his wife.
He's a bad person.
He's one of those weird Johnny Depp-like characters who are like, yeah, me too, but
not him.
Right.
He gets a big trophy, which I think he will.
And I don't know.
Hey, you know what?
All the bad things aside that he's done, I think it's cool that he grew into his last
name to the point where it is now a descriptor.
That is.
Very old man.
Yeah.
It's like if my last name was Cool Guy.
Like, that's awesome.
Isn't shilling,
uh, whatever shilling is for cool guy.
Yeah.
It's a,
it's a Flemish for cool guy.
Oh,
perfect.
We all know now.
Uh,
so I guess I hope get out,
get something.
I hope they get something.
I think that would be amazing.
Also,
there was like a piece someone wrote.
They're like,
who is Jordan Peel's wife or whatever.
And it's like, everybody else was.A. was like Chelsea Peretti.
Like you have you know who that is.
She's a nice lady.
That's all you need to know.
Oh, man.
All right.
Well, let's take a quick break.
Unless do you guys have anything else to add to the Oscars?
The Oscars are dumb.
I would like to give three bilbies to the fish from the shape of water's ass.
The peak 2018.
I'm telling you, that is not his real ass
I'm sorry
it's like Kim Kardashian's
butt
it's not real
it's not the real article
I will find him
so you think
it's a butt double
no I'm just saying
a CG butt
no he's got
he's got a latex butt
prosthetic butt
he's got some padding
on there
he looks like a pretty
skinny guy
I'm like it would be
hard to have that butt
and have that be.
But I have to believe in magic still.
That's what the movies are about.
Hashtag God's plan.
Was it as good as Kit Harington's butt?
Oh, yeah.
That's a nice butt.
That was real butt.
Wait till y'all see mine.
I'm pulling that out before the show.
We'll let you know where to find that on Twitter.
It's real.
Coming up.
All right.
Let's take a quick break.
We'll be you know where to find that on Twitter. It's real. Coming up. All right, let's take a quick break. We'll be right back.
Daphne Caruana Galizia was a Maltese investigative journalist
who on October 16th, 2017 was murdered.
There are crooks everywhere you look now.
The situation is desperate.
My name is Manuel Delia. I am one of the hosts of Crooks Everywhere,
a podcast that unhearts the plot to murder a one-woman Wikileaks. Daphne exposed the culture
of crime and corruption that were turning her beloved country into a mafia state.
And she paid the ultimate price.
and she paid the ultimate price.
Listen to Crooks everywhere on the iHeartRadio app,
Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
Hey, I'm Gianna Pradenti.
And I'm Jemay Jackson-Gadsden.
We're the hosts of Let's Talk Offline,
a new podcast from LinkedIn News and iHeart Podcasts.
When you're just starting out in your career,
you have a lot of questions,
like how do I speak up when I'm feeling overwhelmed?
Or can I negotiate a higher salary if this is my first real job?
Girl, yes.
Each week, we answer your unfiltered work questions.
Think of us as your work besties you can turn to for advice.
And if we don't know the answer, we bring in experts who do,
like resume specialist Morgan Saner.
The only difference between the person who doesn't get the job
and the person who gets the job is usually who applies.
Yeah, I think a lot about that quote.
What is it, like you miss 100% of the shots you never take?
Yeah, rejection is scary, but it's better than you rejecting yourself.
Together, we'll share what it really takes to thrive in the early years of your career
without sacrificing your sanity or sleep. Listen to Let's Talk Offline on the iHeartRadio app,
Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
I've been thinking about you. I want you back in my life. wherever you get your podcasts. BPM 110, 120. She's terrified. Should we wake her up?
Absolutely not.
What was that?
You didn't figure it out?
I think I need to hear you say it.
That was live audio of a woman's nightmare.
This machine is approved and everything?
You're allowed to be doing this?
We passed the review board a year ago.
We're not hurting people.
There's nothing dangerous about what you're doing.
They're just dreams.
Dream Sequence is a new horror thriller from Blumhouse Television, iHeartRadio, and Realm.
Listen to Dream Sequence on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
Hello, everyone. I am Lacey Lamar.
And I'm Amber Ruffin,
a better Lacey Lamar.
Boo.
Okay, everybody,
we have exciting news to share.
We're back with season two
of the Amber and Lacey,
Lacey and Amber show
on Will Ferrell's
Big Money Players Network.
You thought you had fun last season?
Well, you were right.
And you should tune in today
for new fun segments
like Sister Court
and listening to Lacey's steamy DMs.
We've got new and exciting guests like Michael Beach. That's my husband.
Daphne Spring, Daniel Thrasher, Peppermint, Morgan J. and more.
You got to watch us. No, you mean you have to listen to us.
I mean, you can still watch us, but you got to listen. Like if you're watching us, you have to tell us. Like, if you're out the window, you have to say, hey, I'm watching you outside of the
window. Just, you know what? Listen to the Amber and Lacey, Lacey and Amber show on Will Ferrell's
Big Money Players Network on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or
wherever you get your podcasts.
And we're back, and because it is Friday, you know what time it is it's time for you know because everybody be looking at the tabloids when you go to the store and
even if you just read it you might think well maybe camilla parker bulls did go insane
uh but we'll talk about that so guys let's first talk about some of the cover stories.
Let's see.
In InTouch, they are trying to say that Megan had a surprise bachelorette party that Kate Middleton surprised.
Oh, aren't they BFFs?
And they drink a ton of $5,000 wine.
What else?
Kelly Clarkson thinks wine is necessary.
That's just a quote on the cover.
I love it.
I love wine is necessary.
And if you go to that article, that's the whole thing.
Oh, really?
It's just how she feels.
Yeah.
So you like wine?
Yeah.
Great.
I do.
That's going to make it on the cover.
Two page spread.
See, that's big wine infiltrating the tabloids.
We can talk about that later.
In OK Magazine, there's another thing about Middleton is now planning the entire royal wedding.
We love the royals here.
Let's see.
Jennifer Aniston and Angelina, they talked on the phone about how to avoid each other during Oscar season.
Well, time out.
Can I ask a question here?
OK.
So they need to avoid each other.
But they're talking on the phone about how to do it?
Again, it's always like insiders say.
I have a lot of enemies in this town, in Los Angeles, in Hollywood, and I don't talk to them on the phone.
I don't even talk to my friends on the phone.
Right.
I'm not going to take time out of my day to say, hello, enemy?
Yes.
How should we avoid each other?
Well, first of all, don't call me.
That's the best way to avoid that. How do you get my fucking number, enemy?
Yeah.
Hang up.
Have you ever done that during a bad bad breakup though of like called someone and
been like, how are we going to avoid each other at stand-up comedy shows?
Oh, like how do we split time?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Luckily, I've never dated anybody that was exactly in my social circle or seen.
Oh, so you're a smart person.
Mm-hmm.
Amazing.
Good job.
I don't know if I'm smart.
Yeah, I don't know.
I don't know. I'm smart. Yeah, I don't know. I don't know.
I also don't have many friends.
My solution for this problem is to just be more successful than my ex.
Yeah, exactly.
Ooh, that is a great, yeah.
Yeah.
And then we'll do it.
Flex on them.
Flex on the ex, as we say over here.
And I guess with another thing is Katie Holmes and Jamie Foxx, it could be over because he is communicating with his ex, who he has a child with.
So I don't know if that's really a reason to break up.
But anyway, shout outs to them.
And then just through like the really shitty tabloids.
We're talking like toilet paper.
Yeah, the ones like The Globe, The Enquirer, The Examiner.
So The Globe, it's just straight up garbage.
Somehow they're saying the Olympics were rigged against Adam Rippon, despite him fucking
flaming Mike Pence on Twitter.
That was –
I usually like – because the owner of these tabloids is a good Trump ally.
So you'd figure they'd be like Adam Rippon eats fucking children in Korea or some shit.
But they didn't.
They're like, he got robbed.
He's just that charismatic.
Thanks for caping for him.
And again, Camilla put in a mental ward because she had a gin-fueled meltdown.
I don't know.
There again, it's all speculation.
And my favorite is the one about no one has – I think for the last year, there have been – every other week, they try and figure out that a new redheaded man is actually Prince Harry's dad.
And this time, it's this guy, Mark Dyer who just like worked with diana once or something it's very
very weird but again every story like this is always like and prince charles is insanely jealous
of their relationship it's like harry's real dad is carrot top everyone yeah no wonder he's such a
laugh right by next year that or but even by next week that's probably gonna be it or like ron howard or some shit at a young age he was obsessed with props yeah god how old would
have carrot top been in 1984 or 83 he would have been a young buck right yeah he would have been
just right for making babies performing in the court for princess diana highly fertile never
look up carrot tops net worth you'll have to just leap out of the nearest window.
Oh, yeah.
He's making big money.
He's got Vegas money.
It's a lot.
Can you just tell me when you do Carrot Top's net worth?
I'm sorry.
I have to close five fish ass tabs before I'm able to tell you Carrot Top's net worth.
Even being on the Daily Zeitgeist just makes your search history a disaster.
Right.
$75 million.
Hell yeah.
How accurate are those really, though?
I'm not very sure.
They're not really based on bank records.
It's like what people kind of foresee them being worth, right?
That's when you know you've made it in Hollywood is if you start Googling yourself and the
net worth comes up as a suggestion.
Right, right, right.
Or the WikiFeets.
That too.
If my toesies are on the internet, I'm too famous.
What is that, people's feet?
Yeah.
That's legit a 2018 coal mine.
I want to get on WikiFeets.
I can see your feet right now too.
I'm trying to get on WikiFeets.
Did you walk in here barefoot?
No.
The moment I saw you coming in the office, you didn't have shoes on, and I was like,
oh, okay.
It was raining outside.
My shoes got wet.
Oh, gotcha. Were you wearing Chuck Taylor or something? Those are the shoes. I was in, yeah, soggy It was raining outside. My shoes got wet. Oh, gotcha.
Were you wearing Chuck Taylor or something?
Those are the shoes.
I was in, yeah, soggy shoes.
Yeah, you don't want that.
It's too bad.
Okay, I'm not trying to barefoot shame out here.
Yeah.
Because we need the bare feet.
Put me on WikiFeets.
Put her on WikiFeets.
Most people avoid it.
I welcome it.
I'm ready.
And do you want to talk about something to do with hockey, something near and dear to
your heart?
Oh, yeah.
The big hockey breakup. I don't know why celebrities keep marrying hockey players as if they have a thought in their brain.
But Carrie Underwood's heartbreak, pregnant and alone in Star this week, is a really good story because it's all about – it's not about how her husband is cheating on her.
It's all about how he just wants to play hockey and it's ruining their marriage.
Like it's like it's crazy how a freak random acts.
So Carrie Underwood tripped outside her house and needed stitches.
And then her husband wanted to start playing hockey again.
And this was the worst thing that had happened to both of them.
Wow.
They became stronger than ever for a while.
But now it seems like their marriage is falling apart.
As soon as Carrie started to feel better,
Mike began plotting his return to hockey.
You mean his job?
Yeah.
The thing he loves to do?
I just, I love when people marry hockey players
because they are notoriously,
they're little puck brains.
They're doofuses.
Oh, man, I played hockey for a long time.
I'm no puck brain.
You're no puck.
That's why you're here and not playing hockey.
Yeah, I guess so.
Because you weren't obsessed with it.
It's like they were excited about having another baby, but Carrie thought Mike wasn't going
to be playing hockey and would be around to help.
Hockey's destroying lives, guys.
I mean, look no further than Hilary Duff.
Yeah.
Right.
Hockey ruined her life.
So, Anna, you also saw something very disturbing in one of the magazines.
And I'm sorry that I even handed you this magazine.
Thank you again for having me, Miles.
Yes.
Well, thank you for having me is really what I should be saying.
So if you don't know, I produce a Bachelor podcast.
Yes, we know.
And I just, again, I produce a Bachelor podcast. Yes, we know. I just, again, I produce a Bachelor podcast.
Yes, we know.
Wait, what was that?
Can you say that one more time?
Tell me.
I produce a Bachelor podcast.
Go on.
Womp, womp, womp, womp.
And I am very sensitive to spoilers.
Me and my hosts have been trying to go fully spoiler free.
And Miles hands me this tabloid.
Unwittingly.
On the cover is a spoiler to this season which is not over yet the ari lion
dyke jr season is not over yet and i do believe because of women tell all one of the women
on the show says something to ari like i know what you did which i think caused a stir in the
world where every single person and their mother searched for spoilers. So now tabloids think it's okay to spoil the show, which it is not.
Nope.
Some of us live true.
We live pure.
We don't look for spoilers.
Anna's blaming the tabloids.
She's pounding the table.
You're breathing very heavily.
I hope you're wearing diapers in your armpits.
I am sweating.
Jack's got stairs upstairs.
I almost jumped right off our balcony.
Swan dived out when I put this on myived out i couldn't believe it yeah because you went you had a visceral response and i didn't know
because you know i don't know anything about the bachelor and you're like i can't believe this she
walks towards the nearest pane of glass yes he walks right through it i just i couldn't believe
that they would do that they think it's okay it's not okay so what magazine should true bachelor
fans this is us weekly avoid it if you see an us weekly you see ari on the cover do not read the I couldn't believe that they would do that. They think it's okay. It's not okay. So what magazine should true Bachelor fans avoid?
This is Us Weekly.
Avoid it.
If you see an Us Weekly, you see Ari on the cover, do not read the headline.
It is a legitimate spoiler.
And if you're trying to stay spoiler-free like me, God bless you.
You should read Star because they let Slimfast rent out their front page every single week.
And I do want to say one of the girls he picks, her ex-fiancee,
was a hockey player. Oh, no.
Full circle. Maybe they should have a hockey player
be the next Bachelor.
I think that we should have a
Zamboni season of The Bachelor
where it's all these hot women
who are like, you know what? I'm gonna give
him a chance. You should watch The Bachelor
Winter Games, because there was a few Zambonis.
Yeah, it was really frigging good.
It was really frigging good.
Dude, there were some really great profiles written about Olympic Zamboni drivers that if you want a good cry, read the life of a Zamboni.
It's like any Zamboni driver's life is like the wildest, saddest thing you'll ever read.
It's the best.
When I played hockey, the guy who drove the Zamboni at one of the rinks I first started playing at,
he was like,
he always smelled like cigarettes.
Oh, yeah.
He just looked really,
I could tell it was like a thankless job
because I'm like,
we're all having fun.
And then he would sit on there and just wait
and then come out.
Zamboni driver,
it's weird.
I'm like,
it's no one's like first career,
but every Zamboni driver has like this,
like they look,
I'm like,
you've lived.
Like what,
where were you doing?
The guy – when I worked at an ice rink, we had a one-armed Zamboni driver who was constantly – he was insecure about having one arm.
And so he would try to like lean into it and be funny.
He was like, just call me one-armed Steve.
And everyone was like, no.
We're fine with Steve.
I'm trying not to look at you, bro.
You're bumming everyone out. I'm not trying to look at you, bro. You're bumming everyone out.
I'm not trying to limb shame you out here.
All right.
Well, guys, before we go, I really want to talk about the local news that everybody was tweeting at me because earlier this week I said I put a call out to the Zeitgang.
And I was like, yo, tell me what's going on locally about stuff we can cover.
And my goodness, did you guys come through? Because I have been inundated with many great stories from the serial killer Bruce MacArthur in Toronto who was preying on the homeless and vulnerable in the LGBT community in Toronto and burying people in people's flower beds because he was a landscaper to the eco-conscious coffee shop in Toronto that was secretly funding a climate change denial organization.
Racism against Haitians in the Dominican Republic.
Germans being worried about the rise of our far-right neo-Nazi rhetoric in this country.
Politicians in New Jersey – sorry, politicians in New Zealand having a sense of humor and like making statue versions of themselves to the Baltimore Gun Task Force, which we touched on very lightly at one point, but yeah, they're planting toy guns on people or robbing drug dealers.
There has been so much really great news.
So I think what this has really made me realize is that we need to carve out some time to
really kind of do a deep dive on some of your guys' stories, because I don't want to just
regurgitate what you guys say at me wholesale, because I want to make sure we're at least
giving some form of objective truth.
to say at me wholesale because I want to make sure we're at least giving some form of objective truth.
So what we will do now is please tweet any news story that you have that you want us
to take a look at.
Use the hashtag TDZ news.
Hashtag TDZ news.
Oh, there's a new account?
No, this is just a hashtag people use because everyone was –
You wouldn't know about Twitter.
My brain is melting.
I miss it.
You should actually leave the room because we're talking about the Twitter.
I'm soiling myself.
Sure.
So, yeah, please send any news with that hashtag.
That way everybody on the Daily Zeitgeist team can kind of go through the stories.
And we can kind of go through them more because, my goodness, you guys are very tapped in.
And, I mean, even like there was a story that someone was sending me from a baseball player in Colorado.
He was trying to get into a baseball program at a Texas college.
And they're like, hi, sorry, we can't accept you because we have a problem with a lot of athletes from your state and drug drug tests.
And we're just not interested in having any potential drug problems.
You can thank the liberal politicians in your state for that.
Like, whoa, there's a shit like that.
So, yes, I would like this is great stuff.
Please keep sending it and i don't mean to say that one story is more or less important than the other
but it's this is a great source uh auxiliary source of news for us to also consider and also
to clarify when i say objective truth i don't mean to say that you guys are sending me propaganda or
bullshit i'm just saying we love to read everything about it so that way we can do our research too
uh because we just want to make sure we're telling everybody the full story
and we can get everybody just as interested
or outraged
when appropriate.
Guys, thank you and please send more links
to hashtag TDZNews.
We'll start talking about some of your stories
because we love you all.
With that, guys, we're going to have to end it there
because it's Friday. Wait a minute. I had
five other news stories to talk about.
The guy in the Uber that got – he had to go – he went home.
Oh, I want to talk about him.
Tell that one really quick.
Okay.
So he was drunk because that's what people do on weekends when they don't have babies
and wives to take care of.
And then he got an Uber, but he was so drunk that he got an Uber back to his childhood
home and it ended up being like $1,500 because he blacked out for two hours in the car.
It was hilarious.
He blacked out and got a $1,600 Uber.
Now he's complaining because he says that he didn't put the address in, that the guy did it for him.
And it's all bad.
Don't blame the Uber driver.
Good lord.
They have a hard enough life.
They're like basically Zamboni drivers, okay?
Yeah.
They're weathered.
But no, I feel like most Uber drivers still got dreams.
Zamboni drivers, that shit is sailed.
I mean, I feel like Ubering in LA is the new being a server at a restaurant
because everyone I talk to is always like, I'll go to UCB and they're like,
oh, you do comedy too?
And I'm like, you do comedy?
They're like, yeah, I'm about to get on a Herald team or whatever.
I'm like, oh, dope.
Like, so.
Yeah.
Guys, I mean, yeah.
Please don't blame me.
Show me an Uber driver that's not in Improv 301.
Yeah.
And also the guy from the Uber store, he said, quote, we went to a frat party and then went
to the bar.
I was getting drinks all night.
I probably spent like 200 at the bar after already drinking all day.
And he's like, basically, I kind of just blacked out.
The last thing I remember was being at the bar,
and then I just woke up in the Uber next to an older dude telling me
I was an hour out from Jersey.
What a jerk bag.
Yeah, you just got super fucked up.
You blacked out, and you just did one of those things where people are like,
go home, and they're like, what's your address?
And his muscle memory is probably like his childhood home.
Yeah, man, take the L and move on.
Yeah, exactly.
All right, guys.
So, Dave, where can people find you, support you, observe you, love you?
At Hamburger Phone on Twitter.
No.
I'm at Dave underscore Schilling.
You can read my sports takes on Bleacher Report.
Yeah.
I'm on the Masked Man Show on the Ringer Podcast Network if you're into professional wrestling,
which no one in this room is.
I love the big show.
I'm early.
There you go.
I met the big show.
I did a profile of him.
He's a sweet guy.
He vapes.
I knew he vapes.
Because he used to be a smoker.
Yeah.
And he used to eat pizza.
He used to eat pizza too.
Yeah, that's cool.
That's it.
Yeah, those are my plugs.
Perfect.
Jamie Loftus. Zeitgang, I call upon you. Uh-oh. Yeah, it's cool. That's it. Yeah, those are my plugs. Perfect. Jamie Loftus.
Zeitgang, I call upon you.
Oh, my God.
I want my Twitter account back.
I've already written about it.
I'm going to continue writing about it.
People have been using the hashtag, hashtag free Jamie.
I would encourage you to perhaps use it if you feel strongly about me tweeting about the fish.
I mean, mainly of fishes as Zambonis.
Yeah, I want my Twitter back.
Yeah, we got to figure out.
If any of you guys know somebody at Twitter, too, I mean, we're looking at it from our
end, too.
Or if anyone knows a better way for me to get in contact with the IOC, because they
Right.
Rather at friendsmts.org or whatever. I'm writing these really pathetic debasing emails to this email account at friendsmts.
And I don't know if anyone's seeing it.
Man, well, look.
We'll have to sidebar and we'll figure out a real coordinated effort that we can do to try and free the handle.
Okay.
Free the handle.
Free Jamie Loftus.
Free the handle, free the world.
Anna Hosnier, what about you?
I produce a Bachelor podcast.
Oh, do you?
It's called Will You Accept This Rose?
Please listen to it.
We have so much fun.
No spoilers.
It's such a good time.
We have great celebrity guests who also love The Bachelor.
Dave was on it once.
I've been on there, yeah.
We talked last season.
It was so fun.
Yeah, and you can listen to my other podcast, Ethnically Ambiguous, which is also on the
HowStuffWorks network.
Our next episode is so fun.
I talk about the Iran-Contra affair.
What's that?
Damn good time is what it is.
Dude, sick video game by Konami.
Yeah, that was not Iran-Contra.
That was just Contra.
Oh, my bad.
Yeah, I get it mixed up.
Wait, can I plug Bechdelcast?
I forgot.
I got too excited.
No, Jamie, we'll have to move on.
But I guess for you, yes.
Wait, you should
listen to the bechdel cast 100 yeah i'm really so we just released our uh our black panther episode
and uh naomi ekperikin and it is one of my faves we've ever done uh so check out the black panther
episode of bechdel cast all right and if you're looking for me you can follow me on twitter and
instagram at miles of gray if you're looking for me, you can follow me on Twitter and Instagram at MilesOfGrey.
If you're looking for the show,
you can follow us on Twitter
at just Daily Zeitgeist.
If you want us on Instagram,
it's at The Daily Zeitgeist.
We're on Facebook.
Just search for it.
And if you want to,
you know,
check out our website,
that's
http://www.dailyzeitgeist.com. slash slash www Don't fuck this up. D-A-I-L-Y-Z-E-I-T
G-E-I-S-T
dot C-O-M
Quick question.
Dailyzeitgeist.com
How do I find
Daily Zeitgeist on AOL?
What's the keyword?
Oh, the keyword is D-Z.
There you go.
Okay.
Exactly.
For all my AOL homies
out there.
We're in the
entertainment channel.
What if you're one of
Jeeves' babes?
If you're a Jeeves' babe?
Then you ask it, where do I find
Daily Zeitgeist? And Jeeves will bring it up.
Excuse me, Jeeves. But yeah, go to our website
because there you can find all the articles that we talk
about and also the songs that you like
so much and also our footnotes.
There you go. Thank you so much, favorite producer.
That's the character
that she's been working on.
Yeah, so check us out there.
You can also find old shows there as well.
Guys,
thank you so much for tuning in this week.
It's been a real adventure without Jack O'Brien and the captain seat.
Thank you so much to my guests and guest hosts this week.
Andrew T,
Edgar Montpazier,
Dan O'Brien,
Lacey Mosley,
and to you,
Jamie Loftus,
our queen of leeches.
Yeah, it's been really fun.
And Jack should be back Monday, and we'll get back to the regular old thing.
So with that, guys, have a great weekend.
Paternity leave.
Yeah, paternity leave.
And to play us out, I just want to play a legendary artist, the Parliament, Funkadelic, Mr. George Clinton.
Because, you know, Afrofuturism has come back in a big way since Black Panther.
But I just want to give shout outs to Parliament because the P-Funk Earth tour was a legendary tour, one that I actually took an entire college course on.
But there is a song, Swing Down, Sweet Chariot, that was performed at the Oakland Coliseum in 1977, where basically George just gives the mic over to Glenn Goines, who is one of his backup singers with a powerful voice at the age of 24.
He died within a year of this recording of lymphoma, very tragically.
But this song is actually one of the main samples for Dr. Dre's Let Me Ride.
And just listen to this voice because Glenn Goines, I mean, he takes it to church.
And they talk about the mothership coming for everybody.
It's a beautiful song.
So we'll take that to take us away.
And thank you so much, guys.
We'll see you next week.
Free your mind and come fly with me.
It's hip on the mothership.
Groovin' star giant.
Ah!
Ah!
Coming for to take you home Get it on
Swing down sweet Jerry's South Bend
Let me ride
Swing down sweet Jerry's South Bend
Let me ride
Swing down sweet Jerry's South Bend
Let me ride.
Let me ride. We'll be right back. Mothership Connection Home of the people The ball
Uncut
Fun Thank you. Swing down, sweet cherry, stop and let me ride. Swing down, sweet cherry, stop and let me ride.
Swing down, sweet cherry, stop and let me ride.
Swing down, sweet cherry, stop and let me ride.
Swing down, sweet cherry, stop and let me ride. Thank you. Defne Caruana Galizia was a Maltese investigative journalist
who on October 16th, 2017, was assassinated.
Crooks Everywhere unnerves the plot to murder a one-woman WikiLeaks.
She exposed the culture of crime and corruption
that were turning her beloved country into a mafia state.
Listen to Crooks Everywhere on the iHeartRadio app,
Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. There's a lot to figure out when you're just starting your career. That's where we come in. Think of us as your work besties you can turn to for advice. And if we don't know the answer,
we bring in people who do, like negotiation expert Maury Tahiripour. If you start thinking
about negotiations as just a conversation, then I think it sort of eases us a little bit.
Listen to Let's Talk Offline on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your
podcasts. There's nothing dangerous about what you're doing. They're just dreams. screaming fans move on. I am going to share my journey of how I went from Christianity to now a Hebrew Israelite.
For some former NFL players, a new faith provides answers.
You mix homesteading with guns and church.
Voila!
You got straightway.
They try to save everybody.
Listen to Spiraled on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.