The Daily Zeitgeist - The Long Weekend Update 8/7: USWNT, Mitch McConnell, Barbie & Ken, Zuck vs. Musk, Trumpdictment

Episode Date: August 7, 2023

In this edition of The Long Weekend Update, Jack and Miles discuss the Right revelling in the defeat of the USWNT, Mitch McConnell getting booed in Kentucky, people naming their kids after Barbie and ...Ken, Musk vs. Zuck, and a Trumpdictment update!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Kay hasn't heard from her sister in seven years. I have a proposal for you. Come up here and document my project. All you need to do is record everything like you always do. What was that? That was live audio of a woman's nightmare. Can Kay trust her sister or is history repeating itself? There's nothing dangerous about what you're doing.
Starting point is 00:00:18 They're just dreams. Dream Sequence is a new horror thriller from Blumhouse Television, iHeartRadio, and Realm. Listen to Dream Sequence on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, and culture in the new iHeart podcast, Sniffy's Cruising Confessions. Sniffy's Cruising Confessions will broaden minds and help you pursue your true goals. You can listen to Sniffy's Cruising Confessions,
Starting point is 00:00:54 sponsored by Gilead, now on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts. New episodes every Thursday. Hi, everyone. It's me, Katie Couric. You know, if you've been following me on social
Starting point is 00:01:05 media, you know I love to cook or at least try, especially alongside some of my favorite chefs and foodies like Benny Blanco, Jake Cohen, Lighty Hoyk, Alison Roman, and Ina Garten. So I started a free newsletter called Good Taste to share recipes, tips, and kitchen must-haves. Just sign up at katiecouric.com slash goodtaste. That's K-A-T-I-E-C-O-U-R-I-C dot com slash goodtaste. I promise your taste buds will be happy you did. Hello, the internet, and welcome to this episode of the Long Week Trend Report. episode of the long week trend report my name is jack that is miles oh yeah this is our monday episode where we we check in we let you know everyone's okay everyone's okay i was sick as a dog folks sick as a dog uh worse than somehow i took so many covid tests because i was like for how sick i felt it's so weird how what the
Starting point is 00:02:07 pandemic has done to my brain because like now sickness is covid and then i'm like it's the i'm like i have the worst covid ever but no it was the flu and i was chilling on a beach so uh well yeah no nobody recognized me, just like Biden. And I didn't know where I was. I was just found wandering five beaches down. Terrible sunburn on my shins, though. Terrible sunburn. Oh, man.
Starting point is 00:02:37 I had some failures of sunblock application. A little patch. A little patch of sun. Oh, like that? Yeah. A little patch. Oh, like that? Yeah. Your back? Your shoulders? Back. Back, shoulders, crack. You know. Yep, told you. Well, before we tell the people what
Starting point is 00:02:57 exactly happened over this weekend, we should tell the people what is something that we think is underrated, overrated, just to get back into the swing of things. You got an undie for me? Undie, because I was sick. Pedialyte, very underrated. So like I said, I was feeling lower than low, you know.
Starting point is 00:03:23 And Sophia from 420 Day F day fiance she had the flu last week and when i told her i was sick she was like you gotta get pedialyte just make that part of like whatever you do just be just get those fucking electrolytes back into you and i'm like yeah okay sure at first i was hesitant but i you know i i trust you know she she's very in tune with her body and she was feeling better and she was attributing a lot of that to like hydrating properly so i was like okay i'll i will go that that route but at first my whole like perception was man that shit is for babies you think i'm a baby you call me a baby it's got a fucking little teddy bear on the fucking label label i'm gonna buy the
Starting point is 00:04:05 generic because it's cheaper but then has no teddy bear either and then my masculinity is intact uh but yeah it's wild that they haven't like relaunched as like flu fucker yeah exactly or like hangover hangover murderer um but yeah like it's i i'm a fucking i'm stupid uh i'm ignorant and i am i knew not of the fact that something what is that is just marketed as pure electrolyte replenishment is actually effective for little weak-ass babies and brolic-ass thug men that's right that's right so you don't know that's a teddy bear that could just be a real deadly bear with like a cute little uh you know collar on yeah exactly just sit sitting up on his little tuft of bum hair you know you know what i did i did the thing where
Starting point is 00:04:58 gatorade makes a thing called gator light and i was like well let me try that like first you know what i mean because i'm because the marketing because also in my mind i i love like when i was sick gatorade was like before pedialyte was like a thing my mom would always get me yeah so i wanted to just stay a little brand loyal but then when i had that pedialyte shit i'm like now this shit is fucking knocking way harder it felt like just was all around better. Pedialyte really is like medicine. Pedialyte works. Like that is, you know, recommended by all medical professionals. Yes.
Starting point is 00:05:30 Medical professionals agree. You know, we, we keep Pedialyte on hand. Um, and just go to, go to a place that has hung over kids around, you know,
Starting point is 00:05:42 like a college town or something like that yeah like we went to this place in a montauk that was just when we showed up and like to get bagels it was just full of like kids who were like still up still drunk from the night before right and it was the wildest thing like it had a normal cooler of you know the sorts of drinks that you would have at such a place like iced teas and like an entire like five row section of just pedia light just straight up and it was they were burning through that shit party city yeah um it does taste like unformed jello to me yeah it uh does actually work it turns out also like the other thing I was like, I don't want to drink something that's, like, bright blue or red.
Starting point is 00:06:29 Like, I'm already... Yeah, you know, like... That's how you know it works, man. I mean, look, I need that for my Mountain Dews and my sodas. But, like, when I'm in a moment of, like, not feeling well, just there's something about that that made it feel a little bit like drinking, like, cough syrup or something. So then... Yeah, I can see that. The next day i was i was going back to the pharmacy or the shit like pretty much daily because i didn't know how much i needed i was like yeah i'll get a couple bottles
Starting point is 00:06:52 then the next day i fucking got armfuls found dye free kind that's just like clear that and i was like okay i found i found my my pedia light so thank you sophia and thank you to medical practitioners who have been saying pretty consistently that this is good for children and adults labels all say now to like overcome that stupid perception from yeah idiots like me um my underrated is chatty pilots i'm gonna say um i feel like that huh oh chatty I feel like chatty. Chatty, bro. I need my pilot to be a Chad. One of them coming in, biting an apple that he's been tossing
Starting point is 00:07:32 and flipping off the inside of his arm. No, chatty pilot. Yeah. I feel like... So that Seinfeld special where it was him retiring all his like best bits like that is just like burned on my brain i think i only saw it like once or twice but um he had that bit about how like pilots come on and they're like we're gonna take you up to
Starting point is 00:07:56 10 000 feet and then uh we're gonna chill there for a little bit and then we'll be and he's like why don't you just do what you do we don't need to know about all that right it's like a good bit and it like it affected it made me biased against hearing from the pilot at a young age yeah um but when we were flying back uh from the east coast the pilot popped on frequently to let us know what what we could see out our little windows on the plane and it was like people were like up they were engaged like people one guy i overheard was like i've done this flight a hundred times i've never looked out the windows like that that's the first time i've ever seen the grand canyon um so shout out to well i can't
Starting point is 00:08:46 believe i'm saying spirit airlines uh the rockies we saw uh okay the grand canyon and the rockies those were kind of the big ones and my kids were blown away all over that and if you if you kind of view it with a with you know an uncalloused mind where you're just like well this is pretty fucking cool that we get to be here and and see this um in person there's something cool about that yeah well i mean it is always nice like i don't mind when they're sharing like wisdom or knowledge as a pilot i think that's fine like that's additive it's like yeah i don't like the fucking the the jokes yeah you know that's when i was like and i get it you have a personality but like i'm totally fine with them like when they actually explain the turbulence like i don't care like
Starting point is 00:09:36 i'm interested in that where they're like you know it's actually there's this we're actually gonna get up to here because bear here yeah we're just gonna get up a little bit of a few thousand feet here and see if we can just get over that uh just make the ride a little bit smoother and i'm like all right cool man all right i don't care for me is all about hiding my terror from my kids because like they don't even it hasn't like registered to them yet they're just still it's like a bumpy ride in a bus you know yeah and i am still i i don't know oh really i don't like that i don't like turbulence what do you what does it make you think of were you like in a really fucked up turbulent oh yeah that 9-11 i don't know turbulence i know i don't know what it is like it's just the i've read my way
Starting point is 00:10:19 out of the plane yeah i've read my way out of being terrified of turbulence like what you know i've done the research that's like no that's not gonna take a plane down and also that's what that's immediately what i picture is goblins out on the wing just shaking the plane fuck they're in the hall they're in the hall um but uh yeah and even the there's the fact that like the wings can like bend they're not gonna break off no matter how like the wings are very flexible and if the engines fell off you would still be able to land the plane because like the planes are actually giant gliders like all those things i know but my guts don't know it and when there's turbulence i'm like oh we're gonna fall and i do shout that uh you scream out loud and my kids are embarrassed
Starting point is 00:11:13 you look and you're deep in your kids eyes and go we're fucking gonna die what we're fucked man i don't wanna die daddy oh no yeah i like that i framed it as like they don't know yet instead of being just like a weird problem that i have yeah not poisoning your kids with that shit either yeah so i'm just keeping it inside but like i'm sure they noticed that i'm clutching the armrests so hard that sometimes they're cracking yeah you're like elbowing your oldest kid you know scoblins right the pilot comes off yeah we're just gonna we have a little bit of turbulence gonna be a little bit bumpy for the next five to ten minutes nothing nothing to worry about yeah you know it's
Starting point is 00:11:59 fucking he's lying it's fucking god we're done. We're done. We're fucking done. We're done. We're fucking done. We're done. We're done. Yeah. I agree though. When they come on and do the comedy, I always say, leave the comedy to the professionals and I stand up and look around to see if anyone recognizes me. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:12:19 While pointing two thumbs at yourself. To the professionals. Anybody? Anybody on the internet? Z no yeah uh soho house pool i feel like i worked there i was hilarious up there my shit was killing it was killing i know dude ari emmanuel fucking discovered you there also Spirit Airlines I'm gonna say pretty underrated at this point I feel like once an airline
Starting point is 00:12:52 becomes like known as like the shittiest airline it's usually I feel like the public perception is usually behind a little bit and like they because people fly every like you know they don't fly that much. So I've had bad experiences in Spirit.
Starting point is 00:13:08 It's pretty bad. But I feel like they've kind of bounced back or made a concerted effort. I had two lovely Spirit Airlines flights. Really? Yeah. Okay. That's traditionally supposed to be the worst.
Starting point is 00:13:21 You do just have to bring your own water and shit on board you know water and bathroom yeah and you know you have to grease the wheels a little bit give them a 20 to let you use the bathroom um what's uh what's something you think is overrated overrated oh man i've just been like i've been around people more socializing the last few weeks and not necessarily just like in like bigger groups like it'll be someone's birthday or like a like a like a you know get together or something like that and i just hear like there's this like straight guy like shitty grin review of barbie i keep hearing from like cis head dudes that's like it's some version of like it's this like sarcastic way where people are like oh yeah i thought it was really great like it was like really well done and some guy comes in and
Starting point is 00:14:11 goes oh yeah man i'm actually really glad i saw barbie because i'd never heard of like patriarchy before and you're like huh and it's like just sort of this way of like like bringing up trying to say like i don't know if they thought their message it is it's exactly that it's like just sort of this way of like like bringing up trying to say like i don't know if they thought their message it is it's exactly that it's this like very tongue-in-cheek way of being like i am pretty fucking macho guy but also like i'm aware of concepts like patriarchy okay so i get it barbie yeah that's his take the entire time once he hears a single idea that he's familiar with in a movie dismissive we get it well no it's sort of that or just sort of like this other version is like very patronizing it's like and you know like i remember right after that
Starting point is 00:14:58 like changed my life you know what i mean like i'm so different now because of barbie and you're like dude shut the fuck up like this is the most boring fucking take and it's aggressive and you're just dumb like that all you when other people who are like saying yeah of course it's like it's it's rot with all these messages like fine that's that that's what the movie's doing but like that's not even the main focus for a lot of people like they talk about the other performances or the acting the fucking the the set direction all that kind of stuff and it's like some just just seem like dudes come back to this thing it's like oh yeah man he's like but it's like dudes are in trouble right huh huh you get it right dude just
Starting point is 00:15:37 shut up like i'm like who the fuck are you like yeah anyway like just that way of interacting with it i've just heard a few times and i'm like this don't don't be one of these fucking chokes don't do that um be a fucking chad if you don't like the movie and you're a straight cissette dude maybe just keep it to yourself well the thing is those guys are never even saying that they didn't like it you know yeah yeah they're just like really leaning into that part and it's just like too smart for it or something i don't know it just like comes off so weird that's i'm like confused i'm like so you're like you're like you're on fifth wave feminism or something is that what you're like saying well what are we
Starting point is 00:16:15 getting at what are we getting at with this barbie feminist male yeah um yeah p, dude. But that song, I Want to Push You Around, does kind of go. Just FYI. Like, that song fucking is great. You know what's so funny? I wish they hadn't have been so hard on that. Some guy actually said that. Not exactly, but that, the fucking, like, the emphasis of, like, it's like, that song, like, a lot of people thought it was funny like that they were
Starting point is 00:16:45 singing that song like it's a pretty good song like if you if you really listen here let me grab my guitar real quick yeah what three four oh no yeah um how about you my overrated is fight videos seem to be going viral. There's a lot of fight, violence. Fights, first of all, we want to see our two biggest billionaires fight each other. We want to see the Paul brothers fight. It just seems like it's increasingly a part of mainstream culture. And then, I don't know, it seemed like over the weekend there were two big fight videos that were like just everywhere on social media. The guy,
Starting point is 00:17:32 like a baseball player getting knocked out in extreme slow motion. Then like a fight in Alabama, like a, Oh, I saw that shit where like they tried to jump the black security guard and then the whole boat fucking let out. Yeah. feels like i don't know it feels like bite just violent videos are more and more just something we're like yeah oh did you see this like this is fucking awesome it's our new sports yeah it's just like something it's bad it's a bad
Starting point is 00:18:02 feels like something bad is happening inside us and yeah right brian in the chat says world star when that used to be the thing people would scream like even without cameras out i don't yeah i know what you mean like it is it like that's why there's another like being really conscious of your like media intake is important because for a while man the way I could get lost on fucking Reddit and just be served like just all kinds of shit like that you kind of start you go outside and you kind of like alright
Starting point is 00:18:33 so when's it going down now like you start looking it fucks up you creates this sort of weird confirmation bias or like expectation for violence that which can't be good right no no no no no no no although i've seen enough reddit videos and shit and you know i've just been been around seen a few things in my day that i'm definitely more attuned to when i start seeing things like about to head south
Starting point is 00:18:57 because now as a parent i'm like a little bit more i want to be like i don't want my kids anywhere like if i can tell i see fucking energy swirling, like in a way, no, like miss us with all of that. But I don't know. I think a lot of it too is like, it's just this, our frustrations, like our societal frustrations are just boiling over into us just fucking each other up because we're so powerless in every other avenue of our lives that it's like, yeah, you know what? You're the fucking villain today. And watch me act out my like violent rage yeah i think i think we're just angrier and like it seems like it's more and more something that people want to see and i feel like it's probably not good overall on on balance like i'm trying not to watch it but like i'm not i'm not saying i'm above it like i've i have grew up while loving boxing i fucking you gave me that usb thumb drive
Starting point is 00:19:54 when we met you're like dude check out these videos on here they're pretty pretty dark shit man i'm like wait are you hiring for the podcast thing? He's like, yeah, but watch those first. I know you're cool. Yeah. No. Yeah. I think it's just it's like it reminds me of how like there was like that stat about how like some of like the most like so many fights go down at Chuck E. Cheese's between the parents because of like the stress of like having to provide for your kid, wanting your kid to have a good time. And then like how distressful that like how stressful that can be and then you enter some other kinds of shit like
Starting point is 00:20:31 other kinds of variables and then it turns to fucking violence it's just like i feel like because now there is a lot of there's just a lot of dissatisfaction in many ways or people just feel generally unprotected by the government because they're not yeah that yeah we're lonelier and like more separate from one another and the the only way we can conceive of interacting with other people is like being afraid of them and swinging on them yeah and on some level too it reminds of like how like we need to have like a bad guy that we laugh at or like a scammer or whatever it's because like we have such larger problems on the planet that don't have such clear clearly defined villains yeah that we're fulfilling that need in these other weird ways to be like i
Starting point is 00:21:21 don't fucking like there's shit wrong with everything and i don't know who the fuck to be with it but i'm oh that's fucking you i guess yeah we've also talked about how like the uh sex is being taken out of like there's that um essay like everyone is beautiful nobody is horny about like modern hollywood movies and how they've taken the sex out of them and like fight videos same complaint there's hardly any sex in them the people rarely you know make love to one another after after they uh knock each other out um so yeah if you're gonna get in a fight video like at least add some tasteful nudity. Yeah, exactly. Some deep kissing. Just deep, meaningful kiss. Deep, deep kissing, please.
Starting point is 00:22:10 Like punctuate either beginner and your violent fight video with a deep kiss. Boxers touch gloves. I want fight vids that end with a deep, meaningful kiss. Look, Isaiah Thomas and Magic Johnson knew. That's right. When they would kiss a half court. Just a nice kiss. You know what I mean? Yeah. All right. they would kiss a half court kiss just a just a nice kiss you know what I mean yeah all right um let's take a quick break and we'll come back I don't know
Starting point is 00:22:31 what I'm talking like Tucker Carlson all of a sudden we'll come back and we'll talk about why these conservatives are so excited that the U.S. lost in the women's world cup we'll be right back oh god We'll be right back. Oh, God. I've been thinking about you. I want you back in my life. It's too late for that. I have a proposal for you. Come up here and document my project. All you need to do is record everything like you always do.
Starting point is 00:23:00 One session. 24 hours. BPM 110, 120. She's terrified. Should we wake her up? Absolutely not. What was that? You didn't figure it out?
Starting point is 00:23:15 I think I need to hear you say it. That was live audio of a woman's nightmare. This machine is approved and everything? You're allowed to be doing this? We passed the review board a year ago. We're not hurting people. There's nothing dangerous about what you're doing. They're just dreams.
Starting point is 00:23:35 Dream Sequence is a new horror thriller from Blumhouse Television, iHeartRadio, and Realm. Listen to Dream Sequence on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hello, everyone. I am Lacey Lamar. And I'm Amber Ruffin, a better Lacey Lamar. Boo. Okay, everybody, we have exciting news to share.
Starting point is 00:23:56 We're back with season two of the Amber and Lacey, Lacey and Amber show on Will Ferrell's Big Money Players Network. You thought you had fun last season? Well, you were right. And you should tune in today for new fun segments like Sister Court and listening to Lacey's steamy DMs. We've got new and exciting guests like Michael Beach. That's my husband. Daphne Spring, Daniel Thrasher, Peppermint,
Starting point is 00:24:19 Morgan Jay, and more. You gotta watch us. No, you mean you have to listen to us. I mean, you can still watch us, but you gotta listen. Like, if you're watching us, you have gotta watch us. No, you mean you have to listen to us. I mean, you can still watch us, but you gotta listen. Like, if you're watching us, you have to tell us. Like, if you're out the window,
Starting point is 00:24:30 you have to say, hey, I'm watching you outside of the window. Just, you know what? Listen to the Amber and Lacey, Lacey and Amber show on Will Ferrell's Big Money Players Network on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts,
Starting point is 00:24:39 or wherever you get your podcasts. or wherever you get your podcasts. In a galaxy far, far away. No, babe, that's taken. We're in our own world, remember? Right, in our own world. We're two space cadets. And totally normal humans.
Starting point is 00:25:02 Sure, totally normal humans. Embark on a journey across the stars, discovering the wonders of the universe one episode at a time. Sure, totally normal humans. We'll talk about life, love, laughter, and why you should never argue with your co-pilot. Especially when she's always right. Right, and if we hit turbulence, just blame it on Mercury retrograde. Or Emily's questionable space piloting skills. Hey! Join us on In Our Own World for cosmic conversations, stellar laughs,
Starting point is 00:25:28 and super corny dad jokes. Listen to In Our Own World as a part of the My Cultura podcast network available on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. And don't worry, we promise to avoid any black holes. Most of the time. we promise to avoid any black holes most of the time
Starting point is 00:25:43 and we're back and I'm actually not going to explain why you know why they're excited that Megan Rapinoe lost of course it's just funny when you find yourself rooting against
Starting point is 00:26:04 your greatest, the modern day dream team for America, the thing... Because they advocate for themselves? They advocate for themselves. How dare you?
Starting point is 00:26:20 A.K.A. they hate America. Uh-huh. Just let it go. It's wild, though, too, to see that kind of... Yeah. They hate America. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Yeah. It's like, just, just let it go. It's wild though, too, to see that kind of, it also does show how much, how mainstream the women's national team has become because it is like, it's full on. Like it used to be like, if you like sports, you knew about it, but now it's like national discourse about knowing how the women's world, like women's world cup is going. Some pretty, some heartbroken
Starting point is 00:26:45 people out there you know i'm glad they lost the attitude of the u.s women's national team reflect such poor values it's sickening they need an overhaul the america hating entitled ungrateful group led by megan rapinoe needs to go quite fitting she's the one who blew their best chance to win yeah but what is it is it is it that no one watches women's sports because they suck at it and like no one cares or now it's that you're upset because they're not meeting the level of like elite play that you're demanding like which one is it y'all is it wali or is it one mike let me know i don't know what it is. I think it's just general misogyny. But yeah.
Starting point is 00:27:27 Yeah. Anyway, good luck. I mean, congratulations to Charlie. Players. Good players, too, man. They got good. The thing I've been saying is like the dominance of the U.S. Women's national team is to do a lot with the fact that soccer was one of the first sports that like american culture openly was saying like
Starting point is 00:27:45 encouraging like women to get into sports yeah and because the infrastructure was there the u.s was just like miles ahead of even other nations where like they had much more you know or you know long ingrained traditions of football and now things are just equalizing and yeah like now you just got a basketball. It's like, what have it like the dream team was like, you know, miles ahead, but then the rest of the country or the rest of the world caught up.
Starting point is 00:28:14 And you know, the, the influence of like how awesome and glamorous, like those teams were originally like probably had something to do with how awesome everybody else has become and it's you know more fun that way not for Americans though Americans Americans just want to be dominant
Starting point is 00:28:33 they want to be unquestioningly dominant I don't want to have to pay attention to the games I just want to wake up and see that they won 5-0 exactly not losing in pen off to sweden what the heck what the heck um all right uh let's check in with mitch mcconnell yeah i was worried about him during my trip uh i was i was like what is is senator mpc like yeah healthy how's his brain functioning i think you know he it was nice he went to um
Starting point is 00:29:07 uh this like really nice fancy picnic thing like this called the big like fancy farm picnic in kentucky so he was among his constituents and it was it was nice just to see like how his just like the bond that he has between him and his constituents especially after like that you know kind of medical scare that he had a couple weeks ago so i just want to play a clip of just this like this like just them sending it their well wishes as he's speaking uh in a large group of fellow kentuckians he's just like trying to go forward with it too he plowed through he plowed through and the pun was intended because he was at the big fancy farm picnic. He plowed right on through.
Starting point is 00:30:08 But, I mean, Mitch McConnell is no stranger for giving speeches where no one hears what he says because they're all screaming at him. Yeah. But, yeah, this was fucking. It's wild because I'm like, it's I feel like it's maybe something unifying like kentucky right now because you're definitely going to have the maga republicans oh yeah him and then you're going to have like you know the non-republicans democrats independents who are like you are darth you're the fucking grim what is it the what's he call himself the grim reaper of the senate yeah so i think they actually,
Starting point is 00:30:45 he found a moment to unify his constituents and he's been talking about division all along. So it's, I don't know. It feels, it was like a win for everybody there. Cause the Democrats feel like if he retired, they might have a chance of like replacing him,
Starting point is 00:30:58 even though that's, or just to have someone who's such a, you know, shrewd fucking tactician. Yeah. Like operating on that side and i think yeah just with him in office like him out of office i think just is an energetic a w for humanity yeah exactly because again like we said even if he were to retire you know in most states most states the governor would then be allowed to depict who the replacement senator would be
Starting point is 00:31:26 uh which again for most people do a little senate math they're like oh then it could be a democrat no andy basheer even though he's a democrat the fucking republican signed into law that there's no fucking way he can he can only appoint the only way he can appoint someone is if they're a republican so that seat's solidly red for now. How are they able to... Sometimes when you hear about what Republicans are doing in Congress, it sounds like when I'm playing with my seven-year-old
Starting point is 00:31:54 and he's like... And then, no, but I actually have infinity strength and laser blasters, so even though you caught me, they're just making shit up as they go and being like we're actually invisible invincible and uh the strongest person in the world so you actually can't replace us but it's like that energy combined with the fact that like then he's also tying your shoelaces together when you don't see and like sabotaging like
Starting point is 00:32:20 actually doing a lot of did you see that video is that oh oh wait for real yeah he did he did tie my shoelaces together then he said have a nice trip see you next fall um i fell off the dock and they laughed with my head in a bucket for some reason toilet seat around my neck oh no but yeah retire yeah retire man yeah retire um that was pretty dope though shout out to kentucky shout out to the fancy farm picnic. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:33:06 What is that even? Farm parties are... That was some of the most... What's that? Fun things I've ever attended are farm parties in Kentucky. What that means? Like somebody who lives on a horse farm. Just you drive out onto a corner of their property that isn't within
Starting point is 00:33:26 earshot or sight of their parents and then everybody just like drives their cars out there and then you try and be quiet enough and not spook the horses and like have a fucking bonfire wait how do you rage and not spook the horse that sounds like such a delicate balance badly like that that was one one party where everyone's like okay but you do have to like be quiet because uh the horses are out yeah drunk kids notoriously quiet creatures hey we were making it up as we went you know hey i get it i get it uh ken and barbie the barbie juggernaut barbie was number one at the box office again this weekend. A billion dollars. Greta Gerwig. Shout out to Greta Gerwig.
Starting point is 00:34:10 Damn. Really, three for three in the biggest way possible. Oh yeah, watch this. Watch me hit a billion. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles came out this weekend. The Meg 2 came out this weekend. I am planning to take my kids to see Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles came out this weekend. The Meg 2 came out this weekend.
Starting point is 00:34:25 I am planning to take my kids to see Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. I want to see that too, actually. I've heard from my fellow geriatric millennials who are childless, but go to the movies regularly. They're like, hey man, you might want to check that out. Yeah, yeah. You might want to check that out. I'm like, I would, because I like turtles.
Starting point is 00:34:42 My five-year-old is already into teenage mutant ninja turtles um so oh yeah yeah it's gonna be hell yeah it's gonna be wild i mean if you're like i don't know how like i don't know if you're ready to be like hardcore like nerd dad but like those original graphic novels are so good yeah and the drawings are like so much better than like the cartoon i was like this is fucking what the Ninja Turtle should have been. He got into it from the old arcade game at a Chuck E. Cheese that we were at one time. And then a
Starting point is 00:35:11 comic book. Available on Nintendo Switch. Jack, if you want to do that. Is it really? Yeah, of course it is. And I know that. And a comic book that we got at the library. Nice. He gravitated. And he is a party dude. My five- five year old is a party dude who loves pizza oh really cowabunga
Starting point is 00:35:28 but anyways uh kenna barbie domination continues um and it seems like they might be dominating another chart the baby name tracker yeah maybe those baby name tracker sites they said they've
Starting point is 00:35:44 seen a 200 or 300 and 200 percent uptick in searches for the names barbie and ken respectively oh i don't i mean that's probably fine because no and no fucking nobody was surprised searching ken you know like because that feels like a dead name so like i've seen a lot of ken okay you went from two to two searches to four searches you know maybe barbie i don't know i mean again i get it like any after after any big pop culture phenomenon like game of thrones that has like weird names or interesting names people are going to start being like well you know how do i align that with my personal life but like barbie and ken just feel so like norm core yeah you know barbie is pretty impossible to differentiate from the character at this point right yeah
Starting point is 00:36:34 yeah exactly so that's what it feels but again so is so is calise or daenerys yeah and people that's not stopping people but i guess it's like still yeah I'm just like trying to be like there's a those there's cooler names like Alan yeah what about a good name no nothing enough for that one but yeah I mean what do I know I almost tried to name my son after an Arsenal player so let's maybe I'm not the best to speak on this we named our son after not actually after a game of Thrones character, but it did happen to overlap with a game of Thrones character. Uh,
Starting point is 00:37:10 and not serendipitous, serendipitous, you know, what luck, what timing? Um, anyway, all right.
Starting point is 00:37:19 Elon V Zuck. I may be tired of the fights. I may be saying, stop it with this violence folks but the people are thirsty they want to see these two billionaires have an unsatisfying
Starting point is 00:37:34 pushing match daddy wants blood but look Jack we're still getting fucking jerked around over whether or not these little fuckers are going to pop out the wall and have a big cum shot or i mean have a big cage fight um like the latest development came season two is fucking wobbly i just i just re-watched season two and it is so good of uh
Starting point is 00:38:04 i think you should doesn't that fuck up your expectations for season three. Yeah, maybe a little bit, but I don't know. I haven't rewatched season three. I got to watch season three again, but yeah, season two was better than I remembered it.
Starting point is 00:38:17 I will say. Yeah. Anyway, back to this, these little fuckers may pop out of the wall and have a cum shot because over the weekend, Elon Musk said, we're going to, we're going gonna live stream this shit on twitter uh which okay cool and then zuck immediately demonstrated his willingness to counterpunch by quote tweeting that and said
Starting point is 00:38:34 shouldn't we use a more reliable platform that can actually raise money for charity and you're like oh sir elon you should know like they're flirting with each other a little bit more than well there's good there's definitely gonna be a deep kiss on either side of that yes yes um but elon you should know that when you're fighting an opponent especially in combat sports always keep your balls protected because some random tech guy could just come waltz right up and vaporize your sack with one blow like just by being like yo bro your shit sucks though and everyone loved it uh but either way elon musk has been very serious about training based on some of these things we've heard him talk about his own training regimen uh first he said quote if the fight is
Starting point is 00:39:17 short i probably win if long he may win on endurance i am much bigger and there is a reason mma has weight divisions then he said i'm lifting weights throughout the day preparing for the fight don't have time to work out so i just bring them to work and then he goes on basically working out all day if you're just yeah walking from your desk to the bathroom totally having to flush the bathroom you're working those traps yeah i had him put extra weights in the in the flush lever so it acts like it's a lot of energy to do that uh then he said aim quote aiming to get 50 pound free weights this week i build muscle fast physical endurance is my weak spot so i'm aiming to make this quick uh then he goes on quote product testing and
Starting point is 00:40:03 working out kills two birds with one stone I swing one of the 45 pound weights For a kettlebell workout Dude product testing What? There's a few things that I gotta point out When he said I'm lifting weights throughout the day Yeah
Starting point is 00:40:19 Okay that sounds like me Every time I attempt to start lifting Where I go oh yeah I quote lift weights throughout the day. And by that, I mean, I look at some dumbbells I bought and wonder, man, can I still curl that shit? And I pick it up. I curl it once or twice. The second my arm feels any kind of stress or tension, I put that shit down. I go, damn, son, you just maxed out, homie.
Starting point is 00:40:39 You need a seat. Yeah. Why don't you take a break? That's what I picture. I say lifting throughout the day. Like I walk by a weight and and go let me see this real quick all right that was three reps okay i'm ready for my fight with with mark zuckerberg yeah um and then just the yeah aiming to get 50 that's such a lie you're a fucking billionaire yeah who can who regularly summons bullshit at a moment's notice and you're
Starting point is 00:41:05 aiming to get 50 you don't know if you can't afford him if you have time to go to home depot later what the fuck are you talking about yeah so my man is he's shook i don't think i don't think he's in a fight no probably not i think this ends with him not fighting i do feel like we would see that he is much bigger than zuckerberg if they did get in the cage together. Oh, yeah. Hopefully Zuckerberg would be able to do the meaningful deep kiss that puts him to sleep. Zuckerberg, oh, Zuckerberg, he probably gets him in like a rear mount when they're doing jujitsu, and he just starts kissing him on his neck.
Starting point is 00:41:40 He's like, I miss you, Elon. And then he's like, go to sleep. Go to sleep. Go to sleep now let's do that dick man contest um all right uh one more break we'll come back we'll talk latest in the indictment and uh get you out of here we'll be right back i've been thinking about you. I want you back in my life. It's too late for that.
Starting point is 00:42:09 I have a proposal for you. Come up here and document my project. All you need to do is record everything like you always do. One session. 24 hours. BPM 110. 120. She's terrified.
Starting point is 00:42:25 Should we wake her up? Absolutely not. What was that? You didn't figure it out? I think I need to hear you say it. That was live audio of a woman's nightmare. This machine is approved and everything? You're allowed to be doing this?
Starting point is 00:42:40 We passed the review board a year ago. We're not hurting people. There's nothing dangerous about what you year ago. We're not hurting people. There's nothing dangerous about what you're doing. They're just dreams. Dream Sequence is a new horror thriller from Blumhouse Television, iHeartRadio, and Realm. Listen to Dream Sequence on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hello, everyone. I am Lacey Lamar. And I'm Amber Ruffin, a better Lacey Lamar. Boo.
Starting point is 00:43:10 Okay, everybody, we have exciting news to share. We're back with season two of the Amber and Lacey, Lacey and Amber show on Will Ferrell's Big Money Players Network. You thought you had fun last season? Well, you were right. And you should tune in today for new fun segments like Sister Court and listening to Lacey's steamy DMs.
Starting point is 00:43:27 We've got new and exciting guests like Michael Beach. That's my husband. Daphne Spring, Daniel Thrasher, Peppermint, Morgan J. and more. You got to watch us. No, you mean you have to listen to us. I mean, you can still watch us, but you got to listen. Like, if you're watching us, you have to tell us. Like, if you're out the window, you have to say, hey, I'm watching you outside of the window. Just, you know what? Listen to the Amber and Lacey, Lacey and Amber show on Will Ferrell's Big Money Players Network, on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
Starting point is 00:44:03 How do you feel about biscuits? Hi, I'm Akilah Hughes, and I'm so excited about my new podcast, Rebel Spirit, where I head back to my hometown in Kentucky and try to convince my high school to change their racist mascot, the Rebels, into something everyone in the South loves, the biscuits. I was a lady rebel. Like, what does that even mean? The Boone County Rebels will stay the Boone County rebels with the image of... It's right here in black and white in print. A lion.
Starting point is 00:44:30 An individual that came to the school saying that God sent him to talk to me about the mascot switch. As a leader, you choose hills that you want to die on. Why would we want to be the losing team? I'd just take all the other stuff out of it. On segregation academies, when civil rights said that we need to integrate public schools, these charter schools were exempt from that. It's bigger than
Starting point is 00:44:51 a flag or mascot. You have to be ready for serious backlash. Listen to Rebel Spirit on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. And we're back. Yeah. And Donald Trump.
Starting point is 00:45:12 So when I was out, what the heck happened, man? This guy got indicted again? Yeah. Just for exercising free speech? Yeah. Over the weekend, despite being explicitly warned not to,
Starting point is 00:45:22 he went on social media and just, you're not going to believe this, let rip. This guy can't fucking help himself. It does feel like, I mean, and this, I've had this thought throughout his run in politics that he like knows something we don't. And he's like talking like he's about to get like airlifted out of the prison yard but right in this case like i don't know what the escape hatch would be um but he just he went off king yeah i mean because again the prosecutors like we need a protective order because this guy's like if you come after me i'm going after you all caps and people what the fuck is this and also like you
Starting point is 00:46:06 need to fucking muzzle this dude because he has a fucking pattern a history of just like leaking evidence or talking about jury selection or talking about fucking witnesses and trying to fucking witness tamper like that's his whole fucking thing and you know most people are like is this gonna actually lead to him going to jail because like he's pretty aggressively like not following any orders here yeah i know today monday he's supposed to his lawyers are going to court to talk about like this protective order what's gonna happen with that etc what he may or may not be able to do but i just the way that he's fucking truthing is like it's it's like it it i don't know it just felt it's like he's like melting down even more yeah yeah i mean it some people
Starting point is 00:46:54 are speculating that he like must want to go to jail yeah because the things he thinks it'll like rile up his base but um i think it's probably more likely he's just a rich white man who has never faced consequences for his actions and right is unable to suddenly for the first time in his life contain his massive extremely loud personality disorder right i don't know like this is yeah this is he's responded to every legal action by just like incessantly talking shit and like throughout his life long before he was president like that he gets sued all the time and he just you know tries to bully ball uh and he's continuing with that same strategy and it does seem like he might have run out of like options at this point well he has he desperately
Starting point is 00:47:46 needs something to escalate the like the whole jeopardy of it all for his followers like exponentially yeah because right now it's like a thing where people like they kind of don't care if he's convicted you know what i mean they're like yeah they're like i don't care like i don't care if he's convicted i don't care if he's guilty like i don't care if he's convicted You know what I mean They're like I don't care I don't care if he's guilty I don't care if he's in jail I don't know but I like him Also I don't care It doesn't really bother me about him
Starting point is 00:48:14 Because most people are like Yeah he probably committed a crime but I don't care Rather than like this is all fucking bullshit So I'm sure the idea Of him being detained um would really then be like it makes it very real and visceral for like all the maga people it's like oh shit dude like they got his ass locked the fuck up now that's like a i think a huge miscalculation on his part because i don't know what the fuck he thinks it will be like but i don't know up until this
Starting point is 00:48:45 point like he has been handled with such kid gloves this whole time like i'm i'm really i'm not convinced i don't even know i feel like it will be it's not like he's gonna go to gen pop and like actually no no no but even then i think i'm like but bro you're not like gonna go home on time out right if they detain you like they're there you probably you're gonna have to go to some kind of facility yeah but okay go ahead and you know like you can't get your hairspray and shit they don't give
Starting point is 00:49:14 you that I know so we're gonna do so what you gonna do yeah what is he gonna look like the main the tweets were truths or whatever so fucking all over the place from what he was talking about it felt like someone, like a cat thrashing in a bathtub. Yeah, yeah. I purposely didn't
Starting point is 00:49:30 comment on Nancy Pelosi's very weird story concerning her husband, but now I can. Wait, what? Huh? What's this got to do with you right now? Deranged Jack Smith and that one goes on about Nancy Pelosi and her husband goes on for a whole paragraph. Read that one because it's so fucking weird.
Starting point is 00:49:46 But now I can because she said something about me with glee that was really quite vicious. I saw a scared puppy, she said, and she watched me on television like millions of others that didn't see that. I wasn't scared. Nevertheless, how mean a thing to say. How mean a thing to say. didn't see that i mean a thing to say i mean a thing to say oh she's a wicked witch whose husband's journey from hell starts and finishes with her she is a sick and demented psycho who will someday live in hell what the fuck are you talking sir this is a fucking wendy's journey journey from hell starts and finishes with her so what is that even i guess to mean did she so i'm guessing if it starts she's a wicked witch
Starting point is 00:50:35 that i guess maybe conjured him from hell okay and so she journey from hell starts and finishes with her. Interesting. Okay. So that she's merely a manifestation of a lot of lore behind this one. Yeah. I don't know. Unless she's, yeah, she's like,
Starting point is 00:50:52 he's a hell spawn. And then he's like, and once she's done with him, she'll cast, cast him back to fucking hell. Whatever. So, uh,
Starting point is 00:51:01 yeah, I don't know. Jack Smith, he went off on the judge, like, and this is all after they were like, Hey, we gotta ask him not to do this shit because he's biasing juries. He's like revealing evidence about the case.
Starting point is 00:51:15 Um, we can't share evidence with him cause we know he's going to talk about that shit. Um, so I don't know. It just seems like he is incapable of even conceiving of consequences and therefore no or again because he's been living life with them like white privileged star of like mario where you could just like like that even then you're like man what's the consequence anyway you know like it's all everything's like so malformed in terms of how you perceive these kinds of things so it would be fun it's like it's it's it almost feels like that or that like i think wasn't the pilot of south park where they had the volcano in town
Starting point is 00:51:55 and they were all told to just duck and cover and the lava would go over them like as a means to say safe safe in a volcanic eruption like he has duck and cover mentality. He was like, yeah, just duck and cover and then it'll just all go over me. Rather than like, it's magma that will fucking vaporize your whole shit. Right. The worst thing that's ever happened to him is that he wanted to be a professional baseball player
Starting point is 00:52:16 and instead his dad gave him a million dollars to become a businessman. He's like, fuck. That sucks. It could have been great. Yeah, I got fucked over by the system, too. The Pence thing, I think you guys probably talked about this last week, but isn't he on wax in the indictment telling Mike Pence he's too honest
Starting point is 00:52:34 when Pence wouldn't go along with the scheme? That does feel like pretty definitive evidence, right? Yeah, no, he's jacked. He's pretty fucked, right? Yes. Like in a court of law. That feels bad. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:52:49 Because his team's media defense seems to be like, he was just saying what he thought was true. He believed that he had won the election. And they have him on wax saying to Pence, you're too honest. Yeah. And also, not just that. You know he knows he didn't win
Starting point is 00:53:06 because he had to do all these things to ensure to try and overturn the results just need you to like 35 45 000 votes for me yeah and also like the idea the free speech shit is they keep talking about like well he's just saying the he believes that's not what this is about they don't understand what free speech is it's also it's about this conspiracy this collection of actions that came together to attempt
Starting point is 00:53:36 to overturn the election it's not just what he said at the fucking rotund or whatever the fuck it's all the actions too so they're being very disingenuous and again they're just they just need something that's like a very tidy way for the followers again to just be like it's about free speech man and then you can just kind of go on with your day right do they like do they think that free speech means that you can hire a hitman like because you're just using speech
Starting point is 00:54:05 well your honor i believed like that my wife was gonna like take off with all my money in the divorce so i had to murder her it's just words i don't know like i would who knows i mean the these lawyers have they've gone they've gone the extra fucking mile to look as terrible as possible so who knows all right well those are some of the things that have been going on over the weekend uh and into this morning we are back tomorrow with a whole ass episode of the show until then be kind to each other yeah be kind to yourselves get the vaccine get the vaccine there Get the vaccine. There's a lot of, despite the fact that you tested negative, there's a lot of COVID going around.
Starting point is 00:54:50 Yeah. Yeah. Be careful out there. Don't do nothing about white supremacy. And we will talk to y'all tomorrow. Bye. Bye. Kay hasn't heard from her sister in seven years. I have a proposal for you. I'm sorry. or is history repeating itself? There's nothing dangerous about what you're doing. They're just dreams.
Starting point is 00:55:28 Dream Sequence is a new horror thriller from Blumhouse Television, iHeartRadio, and Realm. Listen to Dream Sequence on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Curious about queer sexuality, cruising, and expanding your horizons? Hit play on the sex-positive and deeply entertaining podcast Sniffy's Cruising Confessions. Join hosts Gabe Gonzalez and Chris Patterson Rosso
Starting point is 00:55:46 as they explore queer sex, cruising, relationships, and culture in the new iHeart podcast Sniffy's Cruising Confessions. Sniffy's Cruising Confessions will broaden minds and help you pursue your true goals. You can listen to Sniffy's Cruising Confessions, sponsored by Gilead, now on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts.
Starting point is 00:56:04 New episodes every Thursday. What happens when a professional football player's career ends and the applause fades and the screaming fans move on? I am going to share my journey of how I went from Christianity to now a Hebrew Israelite. For some former NFL players, a new faith provides answers. You mix homesteading with guns and church. Voila! You got straightway. They try to save everybody. Listen to Spiraled on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

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