The Daily Zeitgeist - WebTrendD 1/18: WebMD, Dating App Throuples, Puking Tiger Hidden Illness?, Skibidi Toilet, DoJ Uvalde, Subway Sidekicks

Episode Date: January 18, 2024

In this edition of WebTrendD, Miles and Bryan, The Editor discuss… WebMD's dystopian "bring your ass back to work or else" video, WSJ's article on open relationship enthusiasts crashing dating apps,... that puking tiger video on Twitter, Russia investigating the effects of Skibidi Toilet on children, the DOJ's report on the Uvalde school shooting, and Subway's new "Sidekicks" menu!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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Starting point is 00:00:00 How do you feel about biscuits? Hi, I'm Akilah Hughes, and I'm so excited about my new podcast, Rebel Spirit, where I head back to my hometown in Kentucky and try to convince my high school to change their racist mascot, the Rebels, into something everyone in the South loves, the biscuits. I was a lady rebel. Like, what does that even mean? It's right here in black and white in print. It's bigger than a flag or mascot. Listen to Rebel Spirit on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Right here in black and white and prints. It's bigger than a flag or mascot.
Starting point is 00:00:29 Listen to Rebel Spirit on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hi, I am Lacey Lamar. And I'm also Lacey Lamar. Just kidding. I'm Amber Revin. What? Okay, everybody. We have exciting news to share. We're back with Season 2 of the Amber and Lacey, Lacey and Amber Show on Will Ferrell's Big Money Players Network.
Starting point is 00:00:43 This season, we make new friends, deep dive into my steamy DMs, answer your listener questions and more. The more is punch each other. Listen to the Amber and Lacey, Lacey and Amber show on Will Ferrell's Big Money Players Network on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts. Just listen, OK? Or Lacey gets it. Do it. There's so much beauty in Mexican culture, like mariachis, delicious cuisine, and even lucha libre.
Starting point is 00:01:14 Join us for the new podcast, Lucha Libre Behind the Mask, a 12-episode podcast in both English and Spanish about the history and cultural richness of lucha libre. And I'm your host, Santos Escobar, emperor of Lucha Libre and a WWE superstar. Santos Escobar. Listen to Lucha Libre Behind the Mask on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts,
Starting point is 00:01:34 or wherever you stream podcasts. Hello, Internet, and welcome to this afternoon edition of TrendMD, as we will begin to discuss that company or their parent company of WebMD. But allow me to introduce myself and the day. It is Thursday, January 18th, and I am Miles, and I'm joined by Brian, the editor. How are you, Brian, the editor? Hello, everybody. It's me, Brian, the editor.
Starting point is 00:02:01 Wow. We've got the branding sorted out. Yeah. Do you have merch made yet uh it's being drop shipped oh yeah as we speak yeah because what you just bought like knock off tyler the creator merch yeah yeah igor album and then yeah i paid some people to just scribble it out and put brian the editor just leave the the there leave the the and the comma the editor just leave the the there leave the the in the comma that's it uh anyway let's get into it the first thing that's trending web md that's why we said trend md because their
Starting point is 00:02:34 parent company internet brands which sounds like some dark corporate overlord um put out a very, very eerie video for all of their employees that basically started off that's like, you know, while we, like, people are coming back to the office and we notice those people that are there. Unfortunately, too big of a group is still not bringing their ass into the office to fucking toil. And we are getting more serious that's like a fucking quote out of there about making sure that we change things up in the near future and it feels
Starting point is 00:03:11 like very fucking ominous like they have like the ceo or whatever of internet brands talking and then you see all these other people who are giving like you know little testimonial quotes but they look like there's a literal gun pointed at them off camera like that's right i've never seen people look more like they are in a hostage video than than this exactly outside of a real hostage video i guess even them they look they even kind of have their shit together they were like i as the ceo oh believe that the real um ideas come from please don't hurt my okay okay okay that if we're all in the office together we will make great things together please let her go man um it definitely has that energy and like people are clearly also they're talking all this shit about being in the office half of these motherfuckers on green screen yeah it's painfully obvious they
Starting point is 00:04:03 are on greens if anyone who has spent a significant amount of time looking at people in front of green screens like on youtube and shit it's immediately obvious yeah you're like you're not matching the lighting you're not matching the lighting come on now and we see you that green sort of like bounce light coming out hitting their shoulders on your cheeks and shit yeah no yeah yeah hire someone better if you're gonna do this like this i like how this one dude was said like we ain't asking full like he the way he said is we aren't asking or negotiating at this point we're informing and they got that song eco eco playing they're like hey now hey now hey now and they're basically saying like the transcript the translation of this uh lyric of jacomo fee no i na a
Starting point is 00:04:50 actually means don't mess with us what the fuck is wrong with them and immediately i'm like i don't know whenever i see like black art used by corporate entities in any fashion, it instantly irritates me. I'm like, why? Who picked this fucking song? Why? Why'd you pick this song? Someone who just heard is like, do you know what that song's about? Like, I just, like, it was about, like, this, apparently there was, like, an argument, like, in New Orleans, where two tribes of mardi gras indians they had a confrontation
Starting point is 00:05:26 and like so i think this would be interesting like it's fun because people get dancing but there's a darker fucking message that we can make it be that for the whole thing and it's also like one thing to use that kind of music too to be like return to fucking toil in person they say stuff like oh you know this like this is gonna lead to like increased improvement like we just want to make things better it's like i'm looking at the profits of internet brands they've only been going up so i'm like whenever you hear people say that i'm like either show some like real empirical evidence that you are able to quantify what that means for people to like not have the flexibility to work from home if they're able to or just say like we talk about all the time on this show it's that the fucking rent is too fucked up because they have these massive leases on these
Starting point is 00:06:10 huge commercial buildings and they're like what's the fucking like y'all we got bills man at least at least use the fucking building please yeah like come up with better incentives to get people to come in like you can't i mean look we've already seen company companies that force people to come back in end up taking some sort of massive l yeah like people just leaving or you know the quality of work is just like people just dragging their ass because they have to you know they're tired by the time they get to work, probably. That's why if you're fucking commuting to anyway, I just I hope that, you know, the corporate overlords and the powers that be are able to recognize that if it's working, then just please keep it working. Yeah, it's been running fine for the last three years. You haven't gone under in your mission to make everyone think they have
Starting point is 00:07:06 cancer. Yeah. So I think it's fine. Right. Yeah. Obviously, you know, the thing that we really love here is that all roads lead to,
Starting point is 00:07:16 you have some form of cancer, no matter what your elbow hurts, you have a migraine, you're the, you had a new piercing that seems to be sort of not healing properly that's why it could be cancer we don't know we don't know um anyway what else is trending um there's like there's like wall street journal piece that's out there that is talking about how like a lot of people are using dating apps like you know they're looking it says you're looking
Starting point is 00:07:40 for the one these dating app users are looking for, as DJ Khaled says, another one. And apparently they say, quote, open relationship enthusiasts crash mainstream romance apps creating confusion among those who prefer monogamy. I don't want to be an accoutrement. Accoutrement.
Starting point is 00:08:00 How do you say that word? I think it's accoutrement. I think it's outcasts or men. I think. It can't be accoutrement. But anyway, they're talking about how they go into here. They're on these apps like Hinge and shit. But then people are just like, they're matching with them.
Starting point is 00:08:20 They're like, yeah, we're looking for a third or a fourth. You're down. And they're like, I'm sorry. I'm looking for just a partner. Wait, so you don't want to be in this quadruple are you for real did you see the photo we have a fucking we got three dobermans a min pin uh i have a fucking we have a gigantic industrial size air fryer and a hot tub with four seats and you would get your own custom stanley mug so okay all right fine yeah sure we live we live with my mom but those amenities are still available to you as being part of this open relationship the thing that i've been reading too or just i've seen uh there was
Starting point is 00:08:59 like a tiktok that was going around about this woman who was talking about how she got stood up on a date and she like she's like this dude made plans and said meet me at this restaurant this hour blah blah blah she gets there completely ghosted doesn't hear back from this person and she's there and she's like well fuck it like i guess i'm here i'm dressed up like i'll just have something to eat or whatever because like fuck it um and then someone reached out to her and was saying like that it happened to them too and they there's some conspiracy out there that restaurants are posing as people just to ghost them at their restaurant because there's a higher chance that they would fucking buy something while they're there because of the sunk cost fallacy they did it they did it i love this i love this conspiracy theory that is incredible that i hope that's real i hope i believe it i mean if i was super underhanded i'd be like
Starting point is 00:09:53 you know what the fuck you should be doing like imagine coming here you're gonna be like you don't want to be like oh my date left me whatever and then walk out all sad you'd be like fuck it man i took this out at least i will have some pasta or some see whatever the fuck yeah have a seat have the you know i got stood up special you know we just put it on the menu i know oh yeah or you do the thing where like you come by and then you act as like the really understanding like manager and you're like oh i'm sorry did were you supposed to go on a date you're like yeah i think they stood me up i'm so sorry to hear that yeah josh is a dick wait what how'd you know his name um wait hold on can you can you take your glasses off and no i'm sorry i have to go but you know what i will give you appetizers for half off and uh
Starting point is 00:10:35 the first wine is on me okay but then you go back and you're like wow they were so kind at this restaurant like i got stood up and like the manager was so understanding like i don't know man this that would that would be a doozy yeah true but i mean we're in the eight we're in the era of just such you know cynical fucking in your face scamming that like it would not surprise marketing or advertising yeah 100 100 hey if you believe this if you work in a restaurant or something or you have stories about this please let us know um because i'm i am curious if other people do have any sort of anecdotal evidence that supports this theory because anecdotal evidence is the only kind i will accept uh and then before we go to break just shout out to super producer victor who just
Starting point is 00:11:21 was like hey this video is kind of trending on twitter it's a fucking tiger just puking just an amount that probably would come out of a tiger's stomach but to a human being it just seems like like a fountain yeah i would like i would like a nice a nice stone fountain of this um just like a gigantic what is that like a what are the white tigers called oh i don't know i don't know my tigers yeah saber-toothed tiger i know from power rangers uh because that shit was not orange uh but it is a saber-toothed tiger uh vomiting very hard now i don't know if that's because like the animal's sick obviously i'm not trying to celebrate that but like was was it drinking like too much mike's hard lemonade it looked like mike's heart lemonade i think he just might have drinks too drank too
Starting point is 00:12:10 much water i mean it is a cat i mean cats it's like i think it's third in their ranking of like things they love to do is just puking yeah oh my god cats just sick well doesn't matter yeah they love a good puke i got two cats and i'm always like wow something wrong with the cat they haven't puked in a while mine loves puking right after the the cleaners leave like we'll have somebody come clean the house and then and then you'll hear that that weird churn yeah like five minutes after they leave every person with a cat even a dog you know when they're like they minutes after they leave. Every person with a cat, even a dog, you know when they're like, they're just about to clear it out and you
Starting point is 00:12:50 have to basically get your paper towels and lice all fucking ready and be like, not there, not there, here, right here, right here, right here, right here, do it right here, do it right here. I do not have any more carpet cleaner, so just do it straight into my hands. Fuck it. Enough about that. Let's take a quick break and we'll be right back and talking about more of the goings on. not have any more carpet cleaner so just do it straight into my hands fuck it um all right enough
Starting point is 00:13:05 about that let's take a quick break and we'll be right back and talking about more of the goings on on this planet i've been thinking about you i want you back in my life it's too late for that i have a proposal for you come up here and document my project. All you need to do is record everything like you always do. One session. 24 hours. BPM 110. 120.
Starting point is 00:13:36 She's terrified. Should we wake her up? Absolutely not. What was that? You didn't figure it out? I think I need to hear you say it. That was live audio of a woman's nightmare. This machine is approved and everything?
Starting point is 00:13:52 You're allowed to be doing this? We passed the review board a year ago. We're not hurting people. There's nothing dangerous about what you're doing. They're just dreams. Dream Sequence is a new horror thriller from Blumhouse Television, iHeartRadio, and Realm. Listen to Dream Sequence on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. How do you feel about biscuits?
Starting point is 00:14:18 Hi, I'm Akilah Hughes, and I'm so excited about my new podcast, Rebel Spirit, where I head back to my hometown in Kentucky and try to convince my high school to change their racist mascot, the Rebels, into something everyone in the South loves, the Biscuits. I was a lady rebel. Like, what does that even mean? The Boone County Rebels will stay the Boone County Rebels with the image of the Biscuits. It's right here in black and white in print. They lying. An individual that came to the school saying that God sent him
Starting point is 00:14:46 to talk to me about the mascot switch is a leader. You choose hills that you want to die on. Why would we want to be the losing team? I just take all the other stuff out of it. Segregation academies. When civil rights said that
Starting point is 00:14:59 we need to integrate public schools, these charter schools were exempt from that. Bigger than a flag or mascot. You have to be ready for serious backlash. Listen to Rebel Spirit on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. When you think of Mexican culture, you think of avocado, mariachi, delicious cuisine, and of course, lucha libre. It doesn't get more Mexican than this Lucha Libre is known globally
Starting point is 00:15:28 Because it is much more than just a sport And much more than just entertainment Lucha Libre is a type of storytelling It's a dance, it's tradition, it's culture This is Lucha Libre Behind the Mask A 12 episode podcast In both English and Spanish About the history and cultural richness
Starting point is 00:15:44 Of Lucha Libre And I'm your host, Santos Esc history and cultural richness of Lucha Libre. And I'm your host, Santos Escobar, the emperor of Lucha Libre and a WWE superstar. Join me as we learn more about the history behind this spectacular sport from its inception in the United States to how it became a global symbol of Mexican culture. We'll learn more about some of the most iconic heroes in the ring this is lucha libre behind the mask listen to lucha libre behind the mask as part of my cultura podcast network on the iheart radio app apple podcasts or wherever you stream podcasts and we're back um skibbity toilet is trending uh and i remember for very early on i was like what in the hell is skibbity why what why is this trending again okay so for people who don't know
Starting point is 00:16:37 it is like the bizarre fucking gen alpha meme shit that is taking people by storm with people with their heads coming out of toilets you have like surveillance like cctv camera head dudes and like they're i don't anyway so it sounds like the authorities in russia are investigating it because a man went to police last week and said he had quote accidentally seen the skibbity toilet web series and then he said i am now concerned about its effect on children. And a law enforcement source said that the man had demanded that access to the videos be blocked for their detrimental effect on kids.
Starting point is 00:17:15 And now the guy is asking that the creator also be investigated. And I don't know, apparently now people are like actually looking at that and trying to see if there's some like weird spiritual quote spiritual or moral ideology um in it i i i i mean i guess i look at that i'm like this is freaking me out but then i also chalk that up to like i'm not as online as some of these kids are where like every sort of texture i have that paints my media understanding is from things online in this weird pastiche i wonder if salad fingers was ever investigated for its effect on children right right right because i'm like that's the only that's the only thing from my generation that I can liken to skivvity toilet of like, what the fuck did I just see?
Starting point is 00:18:07 Right. Definitely, definitely weird. But I don't I don't know if it's trying to poison the youth them. Yeah, it's just a funny thing. Like, just like a reaction. Like, the guy sounds so weird. He's like, so I accidentally saw this and I think it could hurt the kids brains. And that's all I have to say about that.
Starting point is 00:18:25 But I don't know. Yeah, go ahead. That sounds like something that maybe I would do if I was 80 years old and be like, I don't know, man. I don't understand it. So we need to figure out what the fuck is going on. So I'm going to take offense. Yeah, exactly. So yeah, good luck.
Starting point is 00:18:41 Good luck with that investigation of Skibbity. If there's a way they can even quantify what the fuck is going on. Then then great. Fine. The Department of Justice is trending because they have released a report talking about the Uvalde shooting and the failed response of law enforcement and basically the uh it should not be at all surprising that their determination here is that it was an utter failure on the part of law enforcement uh from just standing back and turning it into like some kind of barricaded shooter situation um i'm like yeah apparently like i didn't realize that almost 400 nearly 400 officers responded to the scene and we're all just trying to figure out what to do what's going on uh oh i mean no some of them
Starting point is 00:19:32 found stuff to do you know like yeah keeping parents from going in saving their children right one of the lawyers representing some of the parents were also just saying like yeah i mean yeah that was a failure but like let's be real it's because this guy had a fucking assault rifle that's the thing that was that was the thing that was actually preventing cops to go in because they're like oh this guy actually has a very because no one wanted to be vaporized yeah by uh by high velocity rounds yeah it's so you know well how about you know what if you have any recommendations for gun control maybe rather than being like oh yeah man that was an l for law enforcement uh yeah and even like merrick garland was like those uh weapons have only a place in the battlefield
Starting point is 00:20:15 not in a classroom it's not like someone brought it in for show and tell it's like it should be like that those are weapons of war that shouldn't be in the hands of people at all how about that okay whatever we'll see what they do hey look yeah this country's allergic to dealing with the core cause of issues so here's this bunker that your kid can hide in right exactly this whiteboard can actually stop a full-on tank round so also here's another thing that's trending subway apparently they have a new sidekicks menu and whatever this means is that apparently this month they are going to have like a all this like foot long shit that's coming out like a foot long cookie or a foot long churro or like a foot long like a foot long pretzel now hang on miles i'm gonna need you to go back to this foot long cookie what what's this
Starting point is 00:21:15 look at it it looks like basically the length it looks like a flat deflated bun that they would use to make the sandwich it does look like a bun that has not risen and they just drizzled chocolate chips on top right totally unleavened bread um as a fan of as a fan of cookies you're a cookie lover yes i've never had a foot long cookie so i am curious now it's it's hard like part of me is like this is so gimmicky but the other thing is i love subway cookies i do they're good right i like a subway like when they're when they come right out the oven well i remember when i was a kid like i used to have the i'd ask them for like when y'all make the cookies so i can come in five minutes after and get them nice and warm but like this thing
Starting point is 00:22:02 it looks like a like a like a flip-flop that had like the little part that keeps your foot on and like goes between your toe like that part just blew off you know i mean a cookie flip-flop don't that's not an idea you can't just be giving this stuff away a flip-flop you can eat after a long day walking on the streets of new york city yamma yamma yamma you might want to hold on to some of these i just don't know i'm like i'm worried about you i'm worried about you subway this is a foot long like there's something distressing to me about a foot long cookie don't worry about them worry about my ass for wanting this cookie so bad i yeah i want this
Starting point is 00:22:41 cookie uh well at least you're honest uh yeah let us know do you want a foot long cookie it's just it's just not in the shape of a cookie that's why i think i think that's what's alarming to me i think they just bake them in the bread tins like they just put they just line the bread tin that they make the bread yeah oh sure it looks almost precisely like we like we said it's just a flattened unleaveneded, you know, white bread roll for a Subway sandwich. But it's cookie. Like a footlong churro, that makes sense. This, like, other pretzel monstrosity.
Starting point is 00:23:14 A churro should be about a footlong, as far as I'm concerned. Yeah. Well, we'll see. We'll see what happens. Also, a footlong pretzel does seem appealing, but... That might be too much pretzel. It might be. It's hard to tell because I've never, like, unknotted a pretzel to see, like, how much pretzel I'm actually working with.
Starting point is 00:23:36 But this thing looks like a police baton. Yeah, it's like your forearm. It looks like a forearm. It's too thick. I'm sorry. You know what I mean? But I do like a pretzel. The footlong cookie is just weird.
Starting point is 00:23:52 It looks like something like my grandmother would swing at me if I was misbehaving. The one thing that worries me about it is I am lactose intolerant and the amount of milk I would need for a footlong cookie is unhealthy. One gallon. You would have to drink a fucking gallon to lactose intolerant and the amount of milk i would need for a foot long cookie is unhealthy one gallon yeah you would have to drink a fucking gallon to fucking get through this yeah i'm like how much
Starting point is 00:24:10 milk do i need for this foot long cookie well uh guys keep yourself safe out there in a world of foot long cookies and you know terrible gun control and just all the stuff that's out there yeah don't get caught slipping yeah don't't get caught out there lacking a gallon of milk when you encounter a foot-long cookie. But anyway, thank you so much for joining us this week. And today, we'll be back tomorrow with a brand new episode. Brand new. Yeah, thank you so much.
Starting point is 00:24:39 And then, yeah, we'll head into the weekend and all that. But, yeah, we've got another fantastic episode for you tomorrow. Until then, take care of yourselves. Take care of each other. Get the vaccine weekend and all that. But yeah, we got another fantastic episode for you tomorrow. Until then, take care of yourself, take care of each other, get the vaccine, do all that. Don't do nothing about any kind of hatred or bigotry or nothing like that. Please be a person,
Starting point is 00:24:52 be a force for good. All right. We'll talk to you later. Bye. Bye. Bye. There's so much beauty in Mexican culture, like mariachis, delicious cuisine, and even lucha libre.
Starting point is 00:25:10 Join us for the new podcast, Lucha Libre Behind the Mask, a 12-episode podcast in both English and Spanish about the history and cultural richness of lucha libre. And I'm your host, Santos Escobar, emperor of lucha librere. And I'm your host, Santos Escobar, Emperor of Lucha Libre and a WWE superstar. Santos! Listen to Lucha Libre Behind the Mask on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts,
Starting point is 00:25:32 or wherever you stream podcasts. Hi, I am Lacey Lamar. And I'm also Lacey Lamar. Just kidding, I'm Amber Revin. Okay, everybody, we have exciting news to share. We're back with season two of the Amber and Lacey, Lacey and Amber show on Will Ferrell's Big Money Players Network. This season, we make new friends, deep dive into my steamy DMs, answer your listener questions and more.
Starting point is 00:25:55 The more is punch each other. Listen to the Amber and Lacey, Lacey and Amber show on Will Ferrell's Big Money Players Network on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Just listen, okay? Or Lacey gets it. Do it. How do you feel about biscuits? Hi, I'm Akilah Hughes, and I'm so excited about my new podcast, Rebel Spirit, where I head back to my hometown in Kentucky and try to convince my high school to change their racist mascot,
Starting point is 00:26:21 the Rebels, into something everyone in the South loves, the biscuits. I was a lady rebel. Like, what does that even mean? It's right here in black and white in print. It's bigger than a flag or mascot. Listen to Rebel Spirit on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

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