The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz - #BecauseMiami: Banned in the Great State of Florida
Episode Date: October 6, 2023This week on Because Miami, Billy Corben talks to Jeb Lund about an essay he wrote for a blog called Truth Dig the failed Ron DeSantis presidential campaign. Activist Tomas Kennedy joins the program t...o talk about his complaint regarding Francis Suarez to the Miami-Dade county and state of Florida ethics boards respectively. And this week's co-host, Nery Saenz, shares his Top 5 banned books. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Transcript
Discussion (0)
You're listening to Giraffe King's Network.
Welcome back to Because Miami.
It's been a minute, people have been blowing me up.
It's like, if they cancel the show and I'm like, no, they said I could come back though,
as long as we brought on my favorite.
Well, one of my favorite.
Guest Go, Guest Gohoes.
Neary Signs, what was his name?
What was his name?
Darkcom, that's it.
Is where you can find comedian, Neary Signs and all of his funniness.
On my hijinks and shoes, yeah.
We had homework.
Right.
This week.
Yeah.
Ron DeSantis blitzkrieg to loserville, the epic flame out of Florida's bullying and
uniquely, unlikeable governor, shouldn't have surprised anyone by Jeblund at truth dig
dot com.
Did you read it?
I read it.
Like, it was one of those things where I found myself getting more and more into my,
I'm like, oh, this is getting good.
And it just get every single word.
I'm like, and because I'm a dumb guy,
I was like, what does this word mean?
And I was like,
a lot of dictionary.com.
Yeah, a lot of, not a lot of,
but there was somewhere I was like, yeah, take that, Ron,
but also what does this mean?
But it was phenomenal.
I was reading it and like after the first paragraph,
I thought, is this written by Billy Corbin?
Like did Billy, is this my student?
Yeah, yeah, and then I read.
I'm not nearly as smart.
It's exactly my point because of the next sentence.
In the next sentence, I was like,
no, no, this is, no, no, this is more than a three-cellible word.
No, this is a three-cellible word.
Clearly, a more literate man than Billy Corbin.
Do you remember your favorite?
I'll show you mine if you show me yours.
Sure.
I'll give you mine first.
All right, my favorite passage.
It's early in Jeblon's columnon truth dig.com
about Ron DeSantis's Flaming Out presidential campaign here.
If this is to position DeSantis as like the way the media was
that like, oh, he's like the reasonable alternative
for whatever Donald Trump, it says,
if Donald Trump was a shit hammered Bavarian
lurching down the street with splotches of beer cheese
on his crotch trying to grope anyone in front of him
wearing a dandel, then Ron DeSantis was presented
as the answer to the question,
perhaps you'd like your elimination
is a more prussian, sir?
And I know you looked up the word dandel.
I know you, you know.
Absolutely. Open a new tab in your browser.
I love the fact that you think that there was only one word in that sentence.
I don't know the fight.
That's like a website yet to swipe white.
It's like Prussian. Did he spell Russian?
Yeah, I was like, what?
They're variant.
I like their cream pies.
What?
No, but that was, that was a fact.
Okay, I'm telling you, and this is not,
this is not me blowing smoke.
I just kept reading and I was like,
because as a comedian, you know,
I like to take pride in being able to like have,
you know, being quick-witted and sort somebody,
but this is a different level, right?
This is a different way to get to a point where you go,
oh, this is what happens.
This is what it would, this article was like,
what it would be like if a professional comedian had time and didn't have to insult somebody within seconds.
And college.
And college.
Time in college.
Yeah, sure.
Sure.
I went to Miami-Dade Community College for seven years, sir.
I went to college.
By the way, they dropped the first C. It's just Miami-Dade College.
When I went there, it was called Miami-Dade Community College.
By the time I left, it turned into Miami-Dade College, which if you're following the story,
it means the college got accredited, graduated before I did. Oh, I thought I everyday community college, by the time I left, it turned into my everyday college, which if you're following the story, means the college got accredited, graduated before I did.
Oh, I thought it was because the word community
was too synonymous with communism,
but you know, okay, whatever you say.
I'm on it, God!
But my favorite passage is that every candidate
eventually reveals himself,
and it goes on to give a huge list of ways and times that the
scientists eventually revealed himself to not be qualified but my fear was he
visited a hurricane disaster area with his feet so desperately shoehorned into
gleaming white plastic boots that have made one ask aren't you a little too
short and fat for a storm trooper and I just I mean I mean, I cackled, cackled laughing.
I'm right, that's the funniest thing I ever.
I want to show a photo that I took at Disney World
a couple weeks ago.
And more importantly, it is a cross screen
for those of a split screen rather
for those of you just listening.
It is, and one of the rides, Daisy Duck appears
in these white cowboy boots.
And I was like, Rhonda, Rhonda Santas, like, is that you, honey?
And it's just absolutely, absolutely amazing.
And boy, is this the longest intro
and his are like the biggest sort of like,
I mean, we're a fan board.
We're a pair of fluffers over here.
Jeb Lund is actually joining us right now live
on because Miami, I mean, this is a Jeb worthy
of an exclamation point after
his name. He's a writer for the Guardian Rolling Stone, Gawker, deadspin, NBC, Esquire
Vice, most importantly, he's the co-host of It's Christmas Town, a podcast that reviews
the bizarre and gentle world of hallmark original movies.
Jeb, you had previously, I think three years ago now at New Republic declared Ron DeSantis, TNR's
2020 scoundrel of the year.
And now here you are three years later, kind of writing an ongoing riff on this theme.
Where has this guy gone over the course of the last three years?
The last year alone his fate seems to have been depressed.
Well, I appreciate that they bring me out of retirement, semi-retirement, as like the old assassin to track Ron DeSantis. I wish it was somebody more pleasant, just
anybody. You know, where he's gone, like, I think it was a lot easier in 2000 to see where
he wasn't as a leader. You know, like a lot of conservatives, he likes to pride himself
on, you know, leadership and decision. And what happened was, in this amazing, like vast national crisis,
public health crisis, he didn't step in
and he let the rest of us sort of police our neighbors
and police ourselves.
And I think in that leadership void,
we got to turn on each other.
And as opposed to just saying, all right,
we were told, let's do, you know,
the government stepped in and said, do this. And that's what we're going to do is citizens.
And then right after he needed to do that, he decided to do that in the pettiest way
possible. And just this obvious kind of like, you know, Henry Ford production line version
of dunking on the poorest, weakest, most helpless among us so he can look like a big dude, somewhat on the
the level of a Trump. And effectively, it's just sort of strategic bulia. You know, it doesn't
actually do things for people unless what you need is to see somebody else get kicked.
You seem very unsurprised as you point out in your second paragraph that at the start of the year,
DeSantis was pulling within six points of Donald Trump with a Republican primary contest.
And now flash forward, you know, less than nine months later, some polls put him down by
as much as 47%.
You've got some polls that have him trailing Nikki Haley and the Vecra Maswami and Chris
Christie.
This is your shock face.
We're looking at it right now about this.
Yeah, well people met him, you know?
It's like, you got damn right, Meatball.
Any time you're trailing Chris Christie
in a race of any kind, you're not doing well.
You should be winning every race,
any kind of race just Chris is in.
By every definition of race.
By every definition of a word race,
you should be winning, you should be beating Chris Christie.
Well, also, Christie, you know,
what he brings to the table is he's a good bully.
So if that's what you made your brand
for the last two years,
just stomping on everyone already beneath you
on the way to ascending to the White House
and Chris Christie shows up and just ad-libs his way
in front of you, you're f**king spout.
Yeah.
What, your brand is done.
Oh, that's BS.
No, totally, totally BS.
So, Jeb, where do you think this, I mean, he's gonna make it
to, he's got enough money to go through Iowa,
you know, Super Tuesday at least, right?
So we're gonna have to suffer through this make believe campaign.
I mean, you see, just literally waiting for Trump
to drop dead or bottom line is, I think if Trump gets
convicted over and over again, I think it's conceivable we have the first ever
sort of former president in exile running a remote campaign from saudi arabia
or mascal and i think he still gets the nomination from the republican party so
what is the endgame here for ron
well i put it in the column you know i think his next two years are you know he's
just going to be sitting in at a press board table
in an ugly little fluorescent lit room just getting tuned up by lawyers from the Walt Disney
Corporation. The best thing I think he can do is hope he gets enough delegates out of these
contests that he can maybe barter them for somebody who's kind of a tweener, who's hoping that,
okay, they'll be the, you know,
front runner up, if something happens
that's actually disqualifying to Trump.
Because what futures do you have in Florida?
Rick Scott's not going anywhere, Rick Scott hates him.
Marco Rubio's not going anywhere,
and I don't know how Marco Rubio's pet billionaire
feels about Ron, but I don't think he wants Marco
stepping down.
So there isn't a statewide office for him to go to.
The only place to go is up.
So he's got to see if he can negotiate some party position,
maybe where he could alleged that he's a leader of the Republican party.
But I don't think he has a market.
You traveled 3,000 miles in the late 1990s to come to college here in the state, the free state of Florida.
New colleges where you went, it was kind of one of the smallest,
if not the smallest, public college in the state of Florida,
but had a special, kind of a special reputation.
Tell me about the school, why you chose to come here,
and Ron DeSantis' effectively dismantling of it
over the past year.
Well, I went there because the application deadline
had enlapped, and my mom said,
get the hell out of the house, you're miserable.
Go to college, because I was going to Oculous Walton Community College, which is now Northwest
Florida College, but it was a proud institution.
I was happy to go there.
But yeah, new college is really extraordinary.
What's funny, you know, about Ron DeSantis's war on it is he wants to, you know, attack
this woke, progressive thing and restore traditional college,
a traditional university experience.
New college is modeled after a medieval tutorial structure
from Oxford and Cambridge.
You could not get more traditional
in the English language and secondary education
than the new college structures.
I don't know how you modernize that.
Like this is something that monks did
to get their monks certificate.
But what was neat about it is it's basically
an undergraduate grad school.
If you graduate in new college,
you have a nine and 10 chance of finishing your doctorate.
That is just how high the academic success rate is there.
And we would get recruits from grad schools coming down
where there might be three people graduating
from a single department.
But there would be people saying come to our school because they knew a new college
graduate could drop right in and they were good at self-directed education because you
sat with an academic advisor and you said, well, I want to study history. And he'd say,
okay, well, you need to take these four courses, but if you're interested in this and they don't
offer a course, you could make your own. And then you found a professor who was accredited in that field of study and just sat down
and read 14 books a semester with them and then wrote response papers.
It did a research project and it was a way of becoming, you know, a pre-academic before
you even got the diploma.
Jeff, we are at a time unfortunately.
I'd love to have you come back to talk more about New College.
I understand that we could play a less than six degrees of Matt Gaetz with you that there
is a connection there that is worth talking about.
I'm sorry, I think it's Matt Gaetz because in Florida, don't say Gaetz.
So we will definitely have you back to talk about that soon if you would join us.
I'd be delighted.
Thank you.
In the case of Formula One and in the case of Citadel, I paid for that myself.
And in fact, I disclosed it to a member of the media
when I didn't have to.
Well, actually, Ken Griffin's spokesperson said
that he paid for them.
No, I reimbursed him for it.
So what happens is I was invited, I went to the game,
and I reimbursed him because he was a lobbyist,
and I could not accept the gift from him.
So there are rules related to what you can accept gifts from, or you cannot accept gifts
from.
It's richly ironic to hear Miami Mayor Francis Suarez talk about how there are rules about
who you can and cannot take gifts from particularly because he is currently
under investigation by the Florida State Ethics Board for taking gifts allegedly from someone
he shouldn't.
And yes, I know breaking news, everybody pick up your jaws off the floor.
The state of Florida has an ethics board.
I can't believe it.
I was literally like, there's a whole board.
There's more than one person that has ethics in Florida.
She's, by the way, I'm not suggesting they have ethics.
I'm just suggesting there is a board of that monitors and is a watchdog and tries to hold
elected officials accountable, but that in and of itself is pretty shocking.
And so there was a complaint filed against Mayor Francis Suarez for taking some very expensive
VIP tickets to potentially the World Cup in Qatar
with David Beckham, who's a registered lobbyist
at the city of Miami on the Mel Reese soccer stadium,
Boondoggle, Ken Griffin, who is the richest man
in the state of Florida, who also happens to be a client
of the law firm, Quintet Manuel, for which,
Francis War is the mayor.
He bought him some tickets, and so it's turned into this mess and guess what?
Neri, the man who brought this complaint against Francis War as in filed it with the state
is none other than friend of the show, Tomas Kennedy himself a, we'll say a former guest co-host
because he has left us, he has fled for higher ground.
He actually, he fled Miami and has requested a asylum in the free state of New York.
Thomas.
Thomas, tell me about this complaint and what is the recent news you got from the state
of Florida about this?
Because I know just because you file a complaint doesn't mean it's legit and doesn't mean
it'll move forward.
So what's the latest?
Yeah, I mean, you summed it up.
Basically the mayor, who has
sent his wealth balloon in the millions of dollars from over a dozen side gigs, on this
close side gigs during his tenure in office, and, you know, undisclosed payments from developers
to grease their projects through City Hall has also been using his public office to receive
high dollar gifts from lobbying interest before the city of Miami
something that is barred under state law if not reimbursed within an i need a period and this
thing can help this includes these these formula one tickets for him and his wife that are valued
up to thirty thousand dollars and potentially the trip to the World Cup in Qatar and possibly more.
I want to add, the reason why this is such a big deal, Billy, and I, you discussed this
in our podcast is because the mayor is supposed to go before the City Commission and negotiate
a good deal for us, the residents, who pay him a handsome salary to be mayor by the way, when it comes
to these, you know, lobbying interests before the city, but when he's getting paid and
receiving these high dollar gifts by the same lobbying interest, that puts in jeopardy his
ability to negotiate a good deal for us when he has to represent his clients and his interest,
right?
And to be clear, Glen Emileberg on this week in South Florida, her very popular Sunday
show, she confronted him that it was actually Ken Griffin at Citadel, his spokesperson
who admitted that they had invited and paid for the tickets for the mayor and his wife.
And it was only later that Francis Suarez, after the Miami Herald to be fair, Sarah Blaski
and her team at the Herald called him out for this, that he was like, oh, no, wait, no,
I totally reimbursed it only he will not show proof of that reimbursement he will not
tell us on which date he did so and he has not answered any questions about this world
cup thing he ducked Glenn is question about it to how we gotten any answers about how he
wound up in Qatar in the luxury sky box of a registered lobbyist for the city of Miami? No, and that's why I filed this complaint. I told Sarah Blaske who's done an incredible job
reporting all of this when she asked me why I filed this complaint. It's because the residents
deserve to know. It's like what Richard Nixon, another notorious crook said, right? My
Emmy residents deserve to know if their mayor is a crook. And they are not getting answers from either the mayor
or his administration.
In fact, the mayor lies all the time.
He tried to pretend that he was only there for a day,
turns out there's pictures of him all three days.
He said he was there on official business,
Blaski got his calendar and the time
that he was there was marked as personal time.
He says he paid when he gets
pushed back into it. He says he reimbursed. He won't show the tickets or the receipts for this
reimbursement. And you know what, this is Billy. We've talked about this too. This guy got the silk
glove treatment for what three years during his mayoralty, up until the cryptocurrency collapse.
He was the darling of the Miami miracle.
And now the chickens are coming home to roost.
The wolves are closing in and is being exposed.
And he's not used to this sort of pushback from the press.
In fact, he went on this sort of PR tour initially
because my complaint at the Miami date,
ethics board was dismissed because of a technicality saying that I needed to have personal
Knowledge basically be complicit in the grift to file the complaint
Yeah, that's all about right. See that there are that's an ethics committee that that's that's lines up
The ethics committee is like no, no, you need to be in on it, buddy
It is like okay, and that case even then you know most the journalists
I don't want to pick on them
But most of the journalists that engage in this PR stunt
by the mayor didn't properly call him out
on all these inconsistencies.
They didn't do their homework to know
about all these inconsistencies.
And I got to give it to Glen Emelberg.
She did an excellent job calling him out
on every single misdirection that he attempted
and also putting, focusing him on the interview and
him because he kept trying to defer to the Miami Herald and calling them non objective
and biased and whatever it is.
So she did a great job.
Props to her.
Thank God for Glenda.
She didn't get answers to all of her questions, but she asked the questions.
She followed up.
He was very good at running out the clock on her because she has a live show, you know,
with hard outs, but she did an excellent, excellent job.
And we should talk about this.
Just because you file a complaint, don't mean it goes anywhere.
As evidenced by the Miami-Dade County ethics board who, who want a total technicality,
said, oh, you don't have standing, basically.
They didn't look at, they didn't investigate the complaint or dismiss it on its merits.
They just said, you can't investigate the complaint or dismiss it on its merits. They just said, you can't bring the complaint at the state level.
Well, I should start by saying that Francis Waris has accused you of being a partisan activist
that this complaint was brought by a partisan activist.
However, it went to a the state of Florida ethics board,
which is made up virtually entirely of Ron DeSantis appointees.
So he may be right. you may be a partisan activist, but this still has to go through the process
and that said, what is the status of the complaint at the state?
Did they dismiss it?
Look, I may be a registered Democrat, but we have called out corruption in both sides
of the aisle.
In fact, we started our crusade against the City of Miami commission by calling out former commissioner Ken Russell
who's a registered Democrat.
So we call out corruption in both sides of the aisle.
And to be fair, these are theoretically nonpartisan seats.
The mayor does not run as a Republican or a Democrat in the city of Miami.
Exactly.
But you know, basically the Miami-Dade ethics board dismissed it on this bullshit technicality.
However, they did tell me,
and you, I believe, because you were there helping me defend
this complaint, and thank you very much for taking time
out of your day, that the Miami-Dade Ethics Board
can open their own investigation based on the information
that they have learned, and I encourage them to do so.
That being said, the State Ethics Board
doesn't have this ridiculous personal knowledge clause.
So they took about, I think, like a month, maybe a month and a half to review the merits of the
complaint because, of course, we don't want these institutions being use fervilously, right? They
need to have what's called legal sufficiency for them to advance. But everything is in the
Harold's reports, right? In its new stories. And like you said, this isn't even allegedly really like, right?
Like, he admitted it.
They admitted it.
Yeah.
I mean, Ken Griffin and Citadel admitted for paying for this.
I'm sure is admits to receiving the gift.
The only thing that's in dispute here is whether he refunded it or not within the legally
allowed time.
So what is the state said, though, about the complaint so far?
They basically said that
The they're moving forward with it and that an investigator has been assigned to the investigation
So right now we're in the in an investigative process. Mr. Mayor brilliant. You're super smart
It's not just that he's a partisan activist
It just happens to me that the stupid illegal shit just happens to be done by the Republicans. That's all it is. Lucky us.
Yeah.
I mean, look, Bob Mnendis was hiding gold bars in his house after trying to rig the halal
certification process for the whole country.
So there's corruption in both sides.
Oh, well, well, well, well, you don't have to do that.
And he should resign, by the way, especially because his defense, by the way, was I'm
not corrupt.
I'm Cuban.
That's what he said.
He said, like the reason I have cash stashed all over my houses, I'm scared that like
the government's going to come in.
They left like in the 50s his family.
They look number one.
And number two, you got half a million dollars cash laying around your house.
And that's crazy.
That's absolutely.
By the way, he's a Democrat and he should resign.
Okay.
Yeah, there's no doubt about it.
In the last two minutes, Tomas, Francis Suarez, back on his bullshit just this week, breaking
news in the Miami New Times.
What are we reading about today?
Basically the mayor got caught again, he's using public funds.
He took a lavish trip to South Korea and Japan.
Got no white because he's a ceremonial mayor that basically don't to cut ribbons staying at at Ritz Carlton's and other luxury hotels. And he took
these these bodyguards that we the taxpayers paid for and in February when asked
about this trip, he said no city funds, no taxpayer funds were used on this trip
turns out, of course, he used city funds. We are pencrolling this guy's blatant grift. It's insane.
We need to put a stop to it. Like authorities need to step in here and stop what's happening
at the city of Miami. By the way, how have the elected in that city commission under investigation
are arrested? It's insanity. I want to make sure I repeat that stat. Half of the elected officials in the city of Miami
are either under arrest or under investigation.
That is absolutely true to city commissioners and the mayor.
And to be clear, the bodyguards you're referring to
are city of Miami police officers.
So these are taking police officers off the street
to go on some lavish tour.
We're talking about the Ritz Carlton and Tokyo,
the four seasons in Seoul. to go on some lavish tour. We're talking about the Ritz Carlton in Tokyo,
the four seasons in Seoul.
I mean, these are like thousands of dollars in night
for accommodations, for meals,
and the city lied in a public records
request by the Miami New Times and said,
oh no, no, this wasn't,
no, no city money was used.
And that was a friggin lie, dude.
It's crazy.
We're at a time to Moss Kennedy.
I hate you for leaving us here in Miami all by ourselves.
But thank you for being here.
You're always, always welcome on because Miami.
Thank you.
I'll be back in a few weeks, so I don't know if I'm happy or sad about that, but I'll
see you guys soon.
The books that were identified as school districts and as being problematic, they were pornographic,
violent or inappropriate for the grade level in some other manner.
It's time to band books and get the smut out of our schools.
Florida school libraries are filled with pornographic landmines.
Pornographic landmines.
More I dug, the worst it got.
In fact, one of the filthiest books ever written is still plaguing our children.
The Bible!
The book graphically discusses prostitution, incest, rape, pornography, pedophilia, nudity,
bestiality, and sodomy, but it actually doesn't end there.
There was more.
So much more.
Mastervation.
Gentle immubulation.
Bellatio.
Dildos.
Let us walk properly, as in the daytime, not in orgies and drunkenness,
of in sexual immorality and sensuality.
Uh, that is pornographic. Why would we have that in a media center with 10-year-old students?
It's just wrong.
You goddamn right, meatball.
A woman must not present herself to an animal to have sexual relations with it.
I just think parents, when they're sending their kids to school,
they should not have to worry about this garbage being in the schools.
Now kill all the boys,
and kill every woman who has slept with a man,
but save for yourself every girl
who has never slept with a man.
The idea that that's even in there
is inappropriate for these young kids.
It is for the greatness of your iniquity
that your skirts are lifted up,
and you were violated.
How is that an appropriate use of taxpayer dollars?
Smite the smite and this big, bad book.
It should not be offered to children.
Governor DeSantis, the parents of Florida, thank you.
Thank you.
Happy Band Books Week. Everybody it is, it's Band Books Week.
Fantastic.
Feliz.
Is it, is it, is it congratulations or Feliz?
Moseltaugh, what do we, what do you say?
Well, I, I, I will see Moseltaugh.
Mary.
Mary?
Mary, Mary, oh yeah.
Mary, Band Book Week.
Mary, Band Book Week.
But I will see Moseltaugh because Florida now leads the nation in book bans.
We had more than double the bans of number two, Texas.
According to a new report
by the National Free Speech Group, Penn America.
That's only because more Florida people
can read the more Texas people.
So that's only because.
I don't know that that's true.
Yeah.
The report found that 3362 instances
of books banned across the nation in the 2023 school year,
it was just up 33% of the previous one,
but get this, get this, Neri, 40% of those book bans
were from the free state of Florida.
I heard a rumor that you're a big band books fan.
I'm a huge, oh my god.
You get to me, that's what I, that's what I think.
I collect funcals and band books.
That's what I do.
That's what the two things that collect.
I'm not, I'm not, I'm not,
I'm a big might be a bit of a nerd,
but that's pretty cool.
Actually, you're like that,
those are your shelves at the house.
That's pretty bad at.
I'm not, you know,
you'd get a 10 out of 10 room raider
for the backdrop, I mean, with the band books and the, all right.
So Neary Sines has a top five of his favorite books
that have been banned in the great free state of Florida.
Great.
All right.
So the first one, the fifth one.
It's the fifth one.
Oh, wait, we have to explain this is the sort of top five.
We have to explain to him the rules.
Oh, okay.
Go ahead.
Go ahead. All right. So in the next kind of the Dan Labato Show, when we do service top five. We have to explain to him the rules. Okay, go ahead. Go ahead. All right, so in the Mexican of the Dan Laptorn Show,
when we do a top five, usually we start with the least favorite
or the least worst.
That would be number five.
So your fifth book is...
I like to fight that he says,
as in the Dan Laptorn Show,
is the only one that does it this way.
Like the top five.
But technically, I mean,
what, you want to melt Rushmore?
No, no, no, top five.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
Trainmark, I don't think we're even allowed. We have to bleep that, I think. Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no What? They banned. What a good room. Yeah, Julian is a mermaid is a book about a child
who goes and sees three women dressed as mermaids and so he wants to be a mermaid. And the
whole book is about acceptance and about, you know, things that are, you could be whatever
you want to be and do whatever you want to do. And if you want to be a mermaid, you should
be a mermaid. You know, it's about a child's imagination and creativity and yeah.
Yeah.
Band this book.
Band it, you got to bat it.
You got to bat it.
You got to bat it.
So it's clear as day, right?
Cause mermaids are a real thing.
So when a child says to you,
mommy, daddy, I want to be a mermaid.
It's clear that this book must be taken after shows.
Cause how can we have a child reading this?
I think what I'm most impressed is that
somebody identified the metaphor in it.
And they're like, oh, okay.
Oh, maybe we shouldn't let you know.
Oh, Jesus.
Numanoguadro?
Number four.
I mean, it's a toss up because they're also ridiculous,
but this one is this, the Purim Superhero.
Okay.
Am I pronouncing that correctly?
Because I know I'm sure people.
Purim is in the Jewish holiday. I'm just in the Jewish holiday. I'm sorry, it's called the Purim Superhero. Okay. Am I pronounced it like correctly? Because I know I share people.
Purim as a Purim.
I just didn't know you were a Purim.
I'm sorry, it's called the Purim Superhero.
Superhero.
Right.
And they banned it?
And they banned it because he is...
Wait, I'm gonna get pissed now.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
The Purim Superhero is about a child who loves aliens
and like all these fantastical things.
And then there's a Purim festival, right, party.
I guess it was.
Yes. And in order to all his friends are going just about superheroes,
so he doesn't know what to do because he likes aliens
and like outer space things and he doesn't know what to do.
So his two fathers come up with a creative way
for him to go to a Perum contest with still being alien
but being a superhero at the same time.
Oh, so it's about the Jewish tradition of acceptance.
It's about the fact that this holiday celebrates the saving of the Jewish people from annihilation,
based solely on the fact that we were Jewish.
That's one of the reasons why they banned the book.
What we need to do is we need to embrace people of different, of different everything
and say that they are worthy
of being identified.
Did you not hear the part about two fathers, Billy?
Two fathers, man. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, was, oh, you'll get your turn. No, that's right.
I was actually contemplating putting this at number five,
just because of the sheer, but it's such a tame book
and there's nothing create like,
there's none of these books, probably.
All of these books, spoiler alert,
they're all children's books,
because that's what they're trying to do.
They're trying to get to the children at a young age
and they're trying to get to like,
discouraged them from learning about different cultures and acceptance at a young age and they're trying to get to like, discourage them from learning about different cultures
and acceptance at a young age.
So, but sure.
We have to protect the children from acceptance
and different cultures and history and facts.
So, such.
So, yeah, the Perum Superior, I did not know,
I gotta be honest with you.
I was researching this list and I was like,
what's Perum?
I didn't know.
And when I read about it,
me and my wife were reading about it,
we were like, this sounds like an awesome book,
like legitimately awesome.
What I love about this is that I told Neerie
how much this pissed me off.
And instead of moving on to number three,
he just kept, he just kept,
he kept harping on it.
I will say this, I will say this,
my wife and I have literally bought all five of these books
while researching them.
That is sort of the punchline of band books,
is that like people, there's all kinds of books
that I don't give a shit about
that I have to go out and buy once they're banned.
So, Numenotres.
Number three is, and Tango makes three.
This is the one that, this is the,
this is the gay,
the, the what?
It's the gay penguin book.
So, the gay penguin book.
Yeah, this gay penguin.
I heard of this.
So there's two male penguins who,
the whole book is about adopting a baby penguin and two male penguins
take it upon themselves to raise a third.
It's a book about people who want to be parents
and they adopt a child and love them as if it's their own.
You know, acceptance and love and caring.
And all the things that we should not have
here in the free state of Florida, you mean?
It's great. Gay penguin. You mean it's great gay penguin
Yeah, it's called yeah, when you look you can literally Google
V gay penguin book and it comes up and it says and tango makes three by the way
It would be odd if a lot of things came up for gay penguin like which gay penguin book are you looking slow down?
But it's hard our filters having a hard time right none of those
This is a, the hugging lion.
BAM!
So there's a lion that is raised.
That hugs.
No, there's a lion that's raised as a cub by two men.
And they raise it as a cub.
They later let it go into, I forget everyone was,
they let it go into the wild,
or they gave it to a zoo or whatever the case may be,
but they found this little cub, they love it,
they care for it, they let it go free,
and when they go visit the lion, the lion hugs them.
That's it, that's all I have.
So where's the objection of it?
There's two men that raised it.
There's two men that raised the line.
To love other people.
To read it, yeah.
And then they do such a horrible job of raising them
that the line doesn't eat them.
Hugs don't.
Can we just go to number one, please?
The number one ridiculously banned book is,
Warm Loves Warm.
BAM!
BAM!
BAM! I like finally Nuri was waiting for the tadaa Love's worm
I like fun finally nearly was waiting for the tada and Roy was just like I can't I got like give me give me a give me a second Look at this. This is the direct about book ready to work about black worms. No
Sorry, right the bra the worms are brown on the cover. They're brown. I don't know that counts
People of color. Yeah, a worms a color
on the cover, they're brown, I don't know that counts. People of color, I guess.
A worms of color.
Two worms in love decide to get married.
And with help from cricket, beetle, spider, and bees,
they have everything they need and more.
But which one is the bride and which one is the groom?
Who cares?
The earthworms!
The earthworms are notoriously.
That is! There it is, we nailed thorns are notoriously? There it is.
There it is.
There it is.
There it is.
There it is.
If this is the test of the emergency, everything system.
That was only one phone.
Not mine.
Not mine.
Not mine.
I got it.
Oh, no.
Oh, oh.
Hey.
Yeah.
$10.
Hey, by the way, this means the white guys
are getting the signal before you guys are.
Can I just say that?
America is alerting the white guys
about several seconds ahead.
Sorry of the immigrants in minorities here.
I literally thought for a second,
I was like, wait, is this the warms?
Is the one that does it?
The government's coming down to me
because I'm talking about the warms.
Here's the messed up thing about this, is this the warms? Is the one that does it? The government's coming down to me because they're talking about the warms.
Here's the messed up thing about this,
is that a training document from the Charlotte County
public schools superintendent revealed that,
as much as they said,
the don't say gay bill isn't called that,
it's called the parental choice bill,
they actually have said that these characters and themes
cannot exist.
That's a direct quote saying that because there are two dads
or there are any gay best friends
or any LGBTQ plus themes, they cannot exist.
So the idea that don't say gay was used to demean, dehumanize and erase LGBTQ plus people
who very much exist in this society, who very much are parents who send their children
to these schools.
That is and has been the scheme all along.
On that note, nearly of what was his
name.com, nearly signs, great comedian. Thank you so much for being here. I do want to
end on a slightly happy note. Ron DeSantis, the governor of the great state of Florida,
the great free state of Florida was on Bill Mars real time show on a video last week.
Bill Haur. What?
What?
Be patient. He really put him on the the spot here and it was like as if
jib lund was interviewing
ron to santis that is your my m m m m and that is your because my m e for this
week
cocaine
you're trying to thread this needle that will never happen
well we've got a lot of you can't you can't disavow him because you that's the
base
and yet you're running against him and that's why
you know let's face it ron if this if campaign was going well you wouldn't be
on this show