The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz - Hour 1: A Flick To The Helmet

Episode Date: May 13, 2024

Artur Szpilka had one the most unhinged MMA entrances we've ever seen, another MMA fighter took off his pants, and our favorite Cuban fighter was knocked out by a guy named Waldo. Then, complaints about Mother's Day, getting flicked in the helmet vs. getting punched, and Billy's gripe with the Mascot Hall of Fame ahead of this year's public vote. Plus, Stugotz delivers his Weekend Observations by calling out a series of athletes and sports media personalities. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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This is the Don LeBattor Show with the StuGuts Podcast. I have waited too long today to get to this. I know it's gonna make Tony happy. I believe I saw the most ridiculous octagon entrance I have ever seen this weekend. I don't think I've ever seen a fight start so absurdly wonderfully. I don't know where this is from. It reminded me of Arnold Schwarzenegger's Mr. Freeze character. I don't know if this fighter Arthur Spilka is his name. He's 3-0 in MMA. Tony, what can you tell me about this entrance? Because the funniest part about it, I saw it, and then I went and did some research about some things that make it even funnier than just the

entrance. There is no water in this cryogenic chamber that he is in that is made to look like he is coming in underwater, correct? He is dry and just making it look like those wires and tubes are feeding him oxygen that he needs to be underwater, correct? Because otherwise he'd be going into the octagon totally wet and winded, possibly. The tubes look very small too, so it's hard to keep your breath when the tubes are very small underwater. But he gets basically wheeled to the stage and like a wheelbarrow But imagine like a big pod like if he was coming from Austin powers is the Austin powers Chamber yeah exactly picture of Austin powers even has a guy in a lab coat like directing where they're taking the pod

That's the most ridiculous part. I love that guy with a clipboard So Dan this is in kswW which is a mixed martial arts promotion in Poland I'm not gonna try to pronounce the name because I will butcher it but I want I want you to land what the funniest part about this is because I know it but I want you to say but it's it's it's a great entrance to guts indisputably it's a great entrance he's three and oh he's a former boxer in mixed martial arts but when i went to look this up because at this point to got so i have to look everything up like there was a story

trending this weekend that lambo field was allowing smokers yes i and vapers but i don't know it's not so i don't know what it's not because of course is not true but you think it's true because of course lambo field would allow smokers but it's not true wait it's not true, but you'd think it's true because of course Lambeau Field would allow smokers, but it's not true. Wait, it's not true because I saw that as well. I was very excited. I was thinking about moving to Green Bay. No, it is Wisconsin state law.

Because you love Wisconsin so much. You always talk about how much you love it. I love heaters. Yes, you cannot vape and smoke, but I have to basically double check all the time where information is coming from Also what I had to look up when I saw this is was this recently or did I miss it the first time that it happened? So when I looked it up, I then found out the single funniest thing about this Which is that guy came to the ring that way and then was knocked out in 15 seconds. No way

into the ring that way and then was knocked out in 15 seconds. No way. Ha ha ha. Lasted 14 seconds after that intro. That's great. Well he didn't have his mojo back so. The intro was longer than the fight. By a lot.

You cannot, put it on the poll please, can you enter a fight in a cryogenic chamber and then get knocked out in 14 seconds like Must have been awoken too fast or something You have to just last longer than that just run away for longer than that So they can't say that you entered like that and then got immediately knocked out You have to at the very least go the distance if you're gonna make that kind of entrance. You have to, at the very least, go the distance. If you're going to make that kind of entrance, you can't do it in 14 seconds.

You can't lose. Dan, when you started talking about a cryogenic chamber with no water, I thought you meant our studio today because our water's down and we have no air conditioning. There are a lot of daily obstacles that people don't know about that affect the performance. And that roller coaster up there. Josh Hart would say that this is harder than what he does. We do have like this

machine that like tries to helpfully tell us how many water or how many bottles of water we've saved the earth from or whatever and I think we passed like 10,000 recently. How about us? But here's the thing that machine is constantly breaking down you know it doesn't break down? A bottle of water. Which is why we need the machine, but still, doesn't let me down. Put it on the pole please, Juju. You know what doesn't break down? A bottle of water.

Yes or no. Let's get to a fight that ended and the celebration that happened afterward. There are very few people as disliked, and I like him because I like the guys who are jerks but Derrick Lewis is is jerky right? I mean he was waving his shorts in front of a guy he had just knocked out this weekend after winning the fight. He took off his shorts after mooning everybody and and waved them in front of his knocked out opponent. So Derrick Lewis knockout king of the UFC in the heavyweight division, he's got more knockouts

than anybody, the Black Beast himself. He's very known, he's known for a lot of interesting celebrations. He also is famously the guy who took off his shorts and said, my balls were hot. If you remember that a couple of years ago. I'm right there with him. That's kind of where it started.

This is, hey, my balls are hot, that's why I took off my shorts. He knocked out Rodrigo Nascimento and he was airing him out like come on buddy like wake up after the fight He said I wasn't gonna let a taxi driver from Brazil beat me which I thought was also funny But as you can see a little bit of swamp ass that he's got going on, you know he's got the gray under under armor, which I probably would have gone black there to To avoid the the swamp ass he's a badass and an ass and

Waving your shorts in front of a man You've knocked out when he can't see or smell them because you've just knocked him out still awesome is awesome and disrespectful like wildly Disrespectful also through his cup into the crowd which he signed it looked like a reporter caught it and was just like why am I holding this? Regrets catching it. Someone needs to just go punch him in the wiener after a fight that'll put an end to a lot of this It's a five-minute. Well, it'll put an end to your own life because that man Well, there's a lot of people in the ring. Someone will stop it. And if I go and I punch him in the wiener I'm a fighter So like it's not like Billy Gill punching him in the wiener

You also have like ten minutes to run because once you punch any man in the wiener, I'm a fighter, so it's not like Billy Gill punching him in the wiener. You also have like 10 minutes to run, because once you punch any man in the wiener, you have like 10 minutes before they recover. That's a flick. Flick's worse than a punch sometimes. You know what I mean? Yeah. I think I'd rather have a flick. No, you would not. You would most definitely not. Than a punch? Yeah, yeah. It depends on where you get flicked though.

No, I think we're talking about where you're getting flicked. On the balls. Yeah, but there are certain places within that region where it hurts a little bit more. Yeah, then a punch. Sometimes you'd like to take the full punch instead of the flick.

The flick, I'm telling you, more damage than the punch. Mm-hmm. Good to know. Jessica, well, it's not good to know because it's inaccurate. Like it's just. It's not, it's not. It's just Billy and Stugat's being Billy and Stugat's. No, it's not. Have you ever been flicked? No, let it's inaccurate like it's not it's not it's just not Billy and not it's not being Billy. No, it's not Have you ever been flipped? No, let's try it. Come on in here. We'll do it with you. I'm not flicking you Dan I also have some sad news to report our

Cuban fighter Robelis Spain who was the biggest knockout artist on the planet had four fights that lasted ten seconds each lost to Waldo Acosta Valdez a Dominican guy who just took him down for three straight three straight rounds had 19 minutes of ground control he never got up Steve looks like the steams gone out of out of the big boy you can't lose to a Waldo Stu God's is right put it on the pole at Levitard show can you lose no shot either can you lose a fight to a Waldo? Also, is a flick to the balls worse

than a punch at Levitard Show? You're gonna be surprised at those results, I'm telling you. Not balls, not balls. He's right. I don't wanna be too graphic here. Well, not balls. Well, can you tell whoever's posting the poll questions so we at least get the question right?

Say the helmet. For some. That for some was excellent executive producing by you. A flick is not worse than a punch in any circumstance. Billy, no, I got it, Stugatz, I got it, all right? What's the helmet for then? Look, the helmet is like the most prepared for that. Of all the things in that area. Especially prepared for a flick, I would say, like especially prepared for that like a punch not prepared for no one's prepared for a punch

Everyone's gonna come in with one of those concussion things on their helmet tomorrow What are those call that What are those called? That Lego thing that the footguard? The guardian cat. The guardian cat. The guardian cat. Everyone's going to come in with one of those as protection. That's right, protection from a flick. I had a friend of mine, Stu Gutt, made me laugh this morning because he talked about Mother's Day in a way that I thought was both sad and funny,

because he loves his wife, who is a wonderful mother, but he was lamenting the number of things that he had to do yesterday that he didn't want to do that included the buying of flowers, which he described this way to me. I will spend my entire week walking past the table where it will look to me like 70 of my dollars are wilting. 70 of my dollars are falling apart when I would have preferred green flowers that had three 20s and a 10 on them.

Because he was bothered by having to buy uh... flowers when uh... it was not heartfelt and yet it was forced i don't know well it's it's a commercial holiday that is forced on people but you also want to appreciate the mothers in your life. And flowers, honestly, is a bare minimum on effort of making effort for a mother on that day. Five cards and a flower. That's that's usually what I go with. Five cards. Yeah, five cards. I get a card. No, I'm great at picking out

cards at CVS or Walgreens. I'm an expert at it. That goes along with flowers as like the bare minimum though. If all you're doing is flowers. It's bare minimum. And your card. No, they're staples to Mother's Day. That no sex, at least for me. Right.

Sounds like your friend didn't use 1-800-FLOWERS because boy is that quick and easy to use and what a gift. Right, I get two cards from me, one from Emma, one from Rachel, one from the family. Actually I go 60 sometimes, I get one from Finny. I mean that's how you know. I've done that. That's from the animal? The dog card is great. I just cashed a bet by from Finney. I mean that's I've done that that's from the animal

The dog card is great. I just cashed a bet by the way that you would make that joke today So I'm gonna go get that money So how do you sign? No, sir? How do you sign it from Finney? I need to do I signed it for Finney I rough you draw a little popper. No, I don't do I rough you I thought about doing I rough you but I don't do it Just love Finney. I sent my grandma flowers from 1-800-Flowers. Holy shit, Jessica. No voicemail, just a text message. Really dropped the ball. Wow, she's spoiled now.

You've spoiled her. Yeah, I guess. The idea, Stugatz, that the greatest gift you give on Mother's Day is your wife not having to see or be around you naked? Yeah, she doesn't have to see my helmet. Oh, god. Every day is Mother's Day in the Wiener household.

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I think Billy typed an 8 instead of a B. Fine. It's a clear as day of my chinole. Stugats. Number eight. It's Chris Corner on the line. It's easy. This is the Don LeBattar Show with the Stugats.

["I WISH YOU A HAPPY WEEKEND"] I was surprised to learn, Stugats, this weekend that there are no mascots from the state of Florida in the Mascot Hall of Fame. Not a single one. Hmm. That's because that place is a sham. What? That's right.

Mascot Hall of Fame is a sham. Anti-democracy sham. Wow. I'm not going to get started on it. You're not going to goad me into this. It's not going to happen. I'm not gonna get started on it. You're not gonna go me into this, it's not gonna happen. I'm not going to, I'm not gonna do it, sham. They hate freedom, they hate democracy. They hate elections.

I didn't invite you to talk about this. Well you won't, you won't get my thoughts on it. It's not gonna happen, not today. Well I already got your thoughts on it. Oh no, I haven't even started. They're very strong thoughts that you seem to be having on it even though both Bernie and Sebastian Ibis are up for election. You can vote at mascothalloffame.com slash the dash vote dash 2024 if you want to. Real easy to find mascot hall of fame idiots. And then you know what they do with those votes? They wipe their asses with them.

They don't care about your votes or you as people. What do you mean? How do you know this? Because look, all right, fine. If you must know. This guy gets started here. This is what happened. This mascot hall of fame has existed for years

and they have fan voting, right? And about 10 years ago, Billy the Marlin was up for fan voting. And Billy the Marlin won the popular vote of the fan vote. The most vote amongst all the fans, Billy the Marlin. Electoral college didn't vote for him? And then they announced the class and the lead vote getter, Billy the Marlin,

was not part of the Hall of Fame class. Wow. Because they asked for your votes, but as I previously stated, they then wipe their furry, colorful asses with said votes. They don't care about your votes. They don't care about your democracy. They just want publicity,

and they just want you to talk about their sham ass hall of fame that doesn't care about your voting. So I say don't vote for these mascots. Don't vote for this Hall of Fame. Don't pay attention and pay any mind to this half bit two rate whatever Hall of Fame that it is. Where is it even?

Does it even exist? Not to me. It's outside of Chicago and Indiana. Oh please. Half bit? That's right. There's actually no talking allowed in the mascot Hall of Fame.

Oh get over yourself. Is that true? Pretty sure he was joking, Stu Gantz. I was pretty sure that that... You know, they promote it as just 30 minutes away from downtown Chicago. I hate that. You know what? Like, don't use Chicago, hey, just a short 30-minute drive to Indiana from Chicago to the mascot hall of fame. What you're telling people is we're not in Chicago.

Mm-hmm. We're in some place you don't wanna go to. That's it, I mean, that's what they're telling you. There's no talking because they wanna silence your voice. They don't care about you, as I previously stated. But it is 30 minutes from, it's like right by the horseshoe casino. Yeah, but when you say you're 30 minutes from a major city,

it means you're in the middle of nowhere. Sean Connery. It's like Troy. Put it on the pole, Juju, when you say you're 30 minutes from Chicago Does it mean that you're in the middle of nowhere because it is it it's a gift that Milwaukee has they tried to sell Lillard on that But you'll love it It's a couple of hours from Chicago That is a trick that they use they do do that and I just heard st gots moments ago saying that Chicago was the best summer city in the United States

It's amazing because in the summer I would put Chicago up against any other state in the summer In fact, I think it's better than any other state. It's beautiful But in the winter it is a nightmare an absolute nightmare And I'm not certain we have a city in America that goes from nightmare goes from hell to heaven that quickly I can't I can't argue with you It is one of the greatest cities in the world in the world's you gots in the summer But the mascot Hall of Fame is not claiming to be in Chicago and isn't Chicago It's claiming to be 30 minutes from Chicago, which it is just to clarify

Yeah But you know you could drive 30 minutes anywhere like in any direction from Chicago and where you end up is in the middle of nowhere. I would say like an hour. But yeah, like the Chicagoland area is pretty big and pop- very well populated. But I do think that Stugatz is generally right, that cities masking as trying to be bigger than they actually are do that trick and it's a rhetorical trick of, hey, we're not as bad as you think we are, we're just 30 minutes outside of a place you actually like.

If, like, by his logic, Evanston is the middle of nowhere, because that's 30 minutes from Chicago. 22 minutes, I mean, a little different. I mean, it's Indiana. Is it? Wait a minute, how is it a little, I mean, it is eight minutes different, so I guess it is a little different, but you're saying that 22 minutes isn't a smear But 30 minutes is yeah 30 minutes and absurd. It's not 30 minutes. I'm certain. It's really 45 minutes to what?

Are we ripping the Mascot Hall of Fame? You don't want them I'm not saying storm the Mascot Hall of Fame, but I didn't say that an I'm not saying storm the mascot hall of fame, but I didn't say that an Insurrection no, I didn't say you're not you don't furry ass just saying I mean quiet one I know one mascot up for a vote Electors shall be made up comprised of three typo idiot Hall of Fame three different voting bodies the public whom we don't care about it says here members of the mascot Hall of Fame so mascots are voting apparently and executive committee members get off your high horses or Broncos and Mustangs and

whatever other horses are in there there any mascots on the committee I don't know well yes I think he just said that they are the mascots are mascots no he said the mascots who are in can vote and then he said the committee members Oh multiple votes you that can't be then it would be un-american. There's three different bodies that vote on it, Dan Well, yeah, but I gotta tell you I'm looking at this committee and I don't wanna I don't want to judge books by the cover But this seems like a whole bunch of people I would never want to be in a room with I love mascots. I don't think I do too. I don't think Wilbon and I have ever had a bigger and bigger Argument than Wilbon's hatred of mascots, which to me strikes like if you let put let's put this on the pole at LeBatard show

Do you really love sports if you hate mascots if you hate mascots? I hate mascots. I've said it here on the show before I know but I'm with Wilbon okay I'm like you have said mascots like even the sausages that run around stupid hmm I will say this president stupid the president yeah the president's everyone oh care Sebastian deserves to be in though and probably deserved it a while ago yeah it doesn't matter though what you think it's all up to Zoltan and Robert and Chris and Julie Yeah, like the game you remember the Zoltan game that you put like a quarter in and you have to like squeeze it I'm here looking at like this executive committee and I will say this and I

I'll come right out and say I don't know the first thing about being a mascot But I know that the mascot you're not supposed to be pictured with your head off And there's multiple pictures of the executive committee in mascot costumes without heads on. And I feel like they should be dismissed from the committee immediately and sent to mascot hell. Oh wow. How is it possible that your opinion on this is stronger than any opinion than you have on anything ever?

I like democracy. I like a voting process. You know who does it? Zoltan. You know who doesn't Glenn Street You know doesn't Joe Doyle won't even show his face here on the mascot Hall of Fame executive committee pictures You just got mad at someone else for showing their face No, no, but there's someone here like, you know, Tom Hanson is here and you see him with his you know Checkered shirt exactly a Facebook picture. That's fine

You see him with his checkered shirt, exactly. A Facebook picture, that's fine. But Bromley Lowe, here with the fuzzy gloves on. AJ Mass apparently was the Blue Claws mascot. Former Mr. Met. We gotta talk to someone from this committee. Dan Mears, no we will not. Dan Mears is just holding a coyote head, which means he was either a coyote mascot

or he decapitated one. I think he was the Kansas City wolf. Whoa, look at those hands. Oh. When you guys mention mascot hell, capitated one. I think he was the Kansas City Wolf. Whoa, look at those hands. Oh, hmm. When you guys mention mascot hell, what do you imagine is happening down there? Because I've got the Colts mascot and his tail is on fire,

and he's banging his head on the goalpost because the opposing team has made another field goal, but he's a game-winning field goal, but he's doing it for eternity. Like he's doing it, it is he's doing it it is his worst His worst living experience got the New Jersey devil down there. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, he's very popular runs the place All the others all the others are scared of him even the demon deacons are terrified of it How about the Duke blue devil? Where is he in the ranking?

low Where is he in the ranking? Low. He's dismissed. Really? Huh. All the other mascots hate him, but just because he's from Duke, it's not even because he's blue. It's just Duke.

Yeah, it's just Duke. They're yelling at him about Christian Leightner. They're like, you're always slapping the court and taking charges. We hate you. We hate everything you represent. The Nittany lion is a terrible Thing you're right Terrible mascot in the hall they run out of money like buy a new costume like what is this?

Do you want to tell people visually what it is or do you want to keep doing this show? We're gonna weird read weird names from this book And that's what the show is where you just read the names of the executive committee of the Mascot Hall of Fame big red is in there from Western, Kentucky I mean how is the question not in the hall of fame? No, it's not but I'm not saying it's not deserving But how is that in and Sebastian is not just keep no one knows Sebastian. Just what is Sebastian ever done? Thank you, Chris. He got arrested at an FSU game. He got arrested There's a very famous why he hasn't been elected bad behavior. There you go. There's a morals clause

Didn't Bernie get into it one time before here? No Bernie. No get knocked out by someone out into slugger Is there a minor league mascot? That's a different Hall of Fame minor imagine a minor league Hall of Fame You know what the minor leagues are for mascots that can't cut it in the major leagues. Why are we putting Slugger in the Hall of Fame? Minor league mascot. What a joke. Can you guys get for me please the photograph of Sebastian the Ibis being arrested, put in handcuffs at the Florida State Seminoles Doak Campbell Stadium. It is one of the great moments in mascot history. Maybe that's keeping them out. I want to know what it is that you guys think will also find in mascot hell. Where what else? The leprechaun may get to heaven.

Should a college team that has a live animal, should the mascot go into the Hall of Fame? There are no living mascots in the Hall of Fame. Wow. Oh, Ralphie should be in the Hall of Fame. The buffalo? Mike the tiger? Isos Peta prevented them from putting up. All right, go sit in the penalty box for not getting the joke out without being able,

like finding yourself so funny that you couldn't even finish the joke. Oh man. That's not even because you're making it at my expense. It's just cause you couldn't finish it cause you snorted into the microphone, laughing at how funny you are, making fun of me. What the hell's going on around here today?

Boomer, the Pacers mascot is in the Hall of Fame. Can you have a mascot you've never even heard of? Boomer? Get out of here. Dan, when you referenced Sebastian getting arrested, I thought of the picture in black and white, like from a newspaper clipping, and then they put up the picture,

and I was like, yes, that's it! Newspaper, black and white! That a newspaper clipping and then they put up the picture and I was like yes that's it newspaper black and white that's exactly what it was also I'm not here to criticize the mascots I'm here to criticize the mascot Hall of Fame but but blue the Colts mascot is in the Hall of Fame blue is a Colt yet has human hands wearing wide receiver gloves blue should have hooves if you're a good mascot you should have hooves. If you're a good mascot, you should have hooves if you're a horse. Do you guys realize how crippling my insecurity is to see right in front of us on our television

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Craig Lefferts Jim Deshaies Jim Dishez. Doug Brocale. It is time for Stu Gatz to share his game notes. No one in the media will tell you what happened better than my boy Stu. Weekend observations brought to you by Miller Lite. Great taste, just 96 calories available for delivery. Din! It's the second major. Some people say it's the one people care about the least. But not this guy. This guy loves it. So much history. The Wanamaker trophy, rotating courses,

Kiyowa, Whistling Straits, Bethpage Black, and this year, this year, Valhalla, and Dan. Just like that. Make no mistake about it. The PGA Championship is back. That's an upset. How is it that that leads your it's back? What else is back? WNBA. What?

It's a major. The WNBA is major now too. I know it is, but when does it start? It starts on Tuesday. I mean, the PGA starts on Thursday. Oh man. Okay, you're stuck there. I mean, the PGA starts on Thursday. Oh man. Okay, you're stuck there. I walked myself right into that one.

You really didn't. Getting relegated from the Premier League to the championship is the closest JJ Watt will ever get to experience a championship. I'm gonna be making JJ Watt jokes until the day I die, which is soon I think. Relegated? Did you say relegated? Yeah soccer team. I know but relegated is going down. Explain that

joke to us. So he got to the championship league and I'm saying that's the closest I'll ever get to a championship. Champions League? Different thing. We're getting to a championship. Okay. I mean come on. I'm sorry. No, I'm sorry champions league different things Enough thank you soccer. No, you're soccer Nick's Pacers we're waiting I Mean the series kind of started but it hasn't started it's you know, they helped serve what's going on in the Denver, Minnesota series

Is that series started? But he starts every night keep starting okay, I gotta cross that one out so I'm gonna find it anyway This name Rory McElroy You never do never had such a strange dyslexia with just that the L No McElroy he's always taken at itlemore? The L, no, Mackleroy. He's always taking the L. Is that it, Mackleroy? Yeah, it's Mackleroy. Anyway, he won his fourth Wells Fargo championship

over the weekend. Rory, you can win 20 of those, and it will never equate to one Augusta. You told him, if he was listening to this show. Oh, he knows it, Dan. No, I know, but if he's listening to this show, he knows it. No, I know. But if he's listening to this show, he has to win it. Driving around thinking he's a winner.

You heard it. Rory McElroy. You heard him called you out, called you out. Incorrect name. Rory. Watch the draft lottery. The Thunder are still getting first round picks for trading away. Chris Paul, Chris Paul.

Chris Paul, the trade that just keeps on giving. If the Thunder win the title the next four years because of any of those picks, they should give a ring to Chris Paul, but don't worry. It still won't count as a ring in my personal record book. Check it out today. Stugatsbook.com. I am outraged, Dan. I showed you a picture of Stephen a Smith asking the question did Kevin Durant make the wrong career move by going to Golden State I

Wrote a bit that was today today He didn't show me a picture He took it in the eating area of just the television showing Stephen a Smith having a take on the years again Yeah, I mean Dan I strolled through the hallways of ESPN given that take out to anyone who wanted to listen for eight years And everyone called me a quack a joke. They didn't take me seriously and now Stephen A's on it. Oh I wrote a book. He should be ashamed of himself. I'm serious Stephen a Why He should be ashamed of himself. I'm serious, Stephen A. Why?

Stealing my take. Yeah, but you'd be proud of that. It's the centerpiece of my book. I wrote it, man. StephenAbook.com Oh no. Thank you. When you are turning to Alec Berks to save you, you've already lost. You know what the A in Alec Ber stands for Dan already lost him and you're on your game it was hard to get that one his jersey

should be a white flag put it on the pole juju should Alec Burke's jersey be a white flag by the way last week I said he can go for 20 any given night. You said he could, and he did. He went for 20. I'm just letting you know. A B by 50. It doesn't matter, he went for 20.

I mean, that's all I care about. The last time he had gone for 20 before that was February. Any given night. Could be a night in February, it could be a night in May. You never know. Got it right. Kevin Garnett. the NBA. It could be a night in February. It could be a night in May. You never know. Got it right. Kevin Garnett saying

that he can't lose if the T Wolves play the Celtics in the NBA finals. Kevin Garnett, the Stu gots is strong in you. KG, the big ticket. The Knicks traded Obie Toppin for two future second round picks. Dan, you know what Obie Toppin is having? He's having the last laugh. You were gonna say that, huh? No, I was not gonna say that. I was gonna say he was having a moment. Nah, last laugh. Romadouzé out of Bears practice with hamstring tightness and so it begins Wow That's that's it. You're just saying it right now and so it begins. It's okay if he misses a practice roan wasn't built in a day

Or was or as some would like to say in a doozy That is good, who likes it wasn't built in a doozy? Oh doons a poorly said but clever hairs Tired It's new. I said to him the other day I said to him the other day because he was talking about working five days in a week. I'm like We're trying to give you days off. You're you're always complaining that you're tired and his response was yeah, but I just like to complain Who does't? What life is all about put it on the pole juju at LeBataard show is what life is all about complaining

Is complaining what life is all about you got it? PJ Washington leading the Mavericks in scoring their last two games Why is it that everybody gets better the second they leave the Hornets? What's happening? I've got to be honest. Watching playoff hockey, I don't know how a goalie sees a puck coming in and saves it.

Can you explain that to me? Am I alone on this? I think goalie is the hardest position in sports. I do. I think hockey goalie is. It's pretty hard. I think they get lucky a lot. They shouldn't be able to stand right in front of them. Listen, I don't think they see a thing. They just get their body in front of it somehow. You just see the goalie's head poking around. You cover as much of the goal as you can and you make a save. It's called positioning. Thank you, Roy. It is, but I do feel that Chris with the pantomime there did show you something that is an anxious way

to spend a couple of hours, which is just like John Taffer in Bar Rescue looking around a plant to yell at somebody at all times, moving your head around because you can't see. And those things are coming in at a hundred miles an hour You can't see it then it hits your shin. They used to not wear masks. Yeah about that that part's nuts Crazy what what year was that that they it's an hockey was hockey Dan Oh when I used to pay attention to it now Crazy

Roy yes, when did goalie starting start wearing helmets when did that happen? I can't speak. What happened? Around the 60s, I believe. The first goalie to wear a mask was in 1959. So Tony was like, what? Six, seven. You remember that far back? 13. Greg was five. Rome and a Douuzette. Get it? Carolina Hurricanes, congratulations on staving off elimination. Sean Payton, saying that Bo Nix has been exactly what we saw in scouting him. It'd be odd if he was different. I mean, what's he supposed to say? Reports out of Broncos rookie mini camp on Nix. the difference. I don't know how to pronounce his name it's got a name looks one way but they pronounce it another way and I'm like how's that how you say it yeah

Debra I don't know it's yeah at one point good guess at one point in Saturday's Cubs Pirates game the Pirates walked in six runs in a single inning. They won the game. Baseball. What? Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha his name is, made his MLB debut this weekend. The Pirates leadoff hitter was Andrew McCutchen. Still doing it. Yeah, he is. Cutch. One of the best ever.

That's not true. Not really. Top five athletes that can out Pirates. Number five, Captain Curtis Stevenson. That's not an athlete. Oh, he's in sports. That's not an athlete. It's a local radio show.

He was a high school football star. I'm telling you, North Miami. Check it out. He is not. Miami likes high. You're making shit up now. Captain Curtis Stevenson. Pretty good.

Number four, Rory Sparrow. Number three, Riddick Bow. Why Riddick Bow? Bow, pirate. What? Look it up. Like Roy Jones Jr. should be on this list. You just did Rory Sparrow off of Captain Jack Sparrow, which is a reach, but then you just,

I don't know what you're going for. Captain Bo. I don't know what you're going for on Riddick Bo. Number two. Explain them, no, explain to me what you mean. These are your lists, you're doing this. Riddick Bo gives off pirates how? You're not a pirate and you're certainly not a guy who spends a lot of time on the water I am telling you that

a bow is something that connotes a pirate and that's all I can tell you do you think they have like bow and arrows the bow is the forward part of the whole of a ship bow bow bow it's spelled bow she said Riddick bow. Take a bow. B-O-W-E. Number two, Josh Booty. You get that one, I need to split it. Number one, Doug Plank. No Roy Jones Jr. No Captain Hook. Come on, man. Make your own.

I'm here for it. OK. Where was it? T-Wolves, do it at home. My wife asked me over the weekend if the Thunder Coach was also the team trainer. He looks like a trainer. He's got a trainer face.

Hey, Brawny, enjoy Atlanta, the ATL. You have to take them, right? What? You get Brawny, they have the number one pick. Yeah. Number one. You're going to get a player better than his dad in the draft? Seriously? I was thinking about this. This has Shabazz Napier 2.0 written all over it, right? Where a team drafts Brawny because they think this is the key to keeping LeBron on this team and then LeBron leaves and then you're stuck with Shabazz Napier. That's a thing that happened to the Miami Heat. In this week's edition of Who Could Have Saw That Coming, the Lakers are intrigued by JJ Reddick,

his head coach. Make up your mind, JJ. They're also open to drafting brawning. Who saw that one coming? Dan, you know what the J in JJ Reddick stands for? Jeff Saturday. If JJ coaches LeBron, do they still do their podcasting? You know what, decide if you want to be a podcaster, a media member or a coach.

Just figure it out already, JJ. That's all I'm saying. He doesn't have to. Is he bothering you? You're both. You were coaching a podcaster for a while? I was. I think it paid for it though.

Coaching. Love the game. Yep. And the kids. Coach it. Love the game. Yep. And the kids. It's for the kids. Where was I? Coach Calipari, saying he only wants

eight or nine scholarship players this year at Arkansas instead of 13. Can't wait until they get eliminated in the first or second round of the tournament and the first thing out of Calipari's mouth is I wish I had more scholarship players. This guy man. Sick of him.

Arkansas. You'll be sick of him soon. I promise. We'll see NFL. Make me wait one more week for the schedules and you know what I'll do. I'll wait one more week for the schedules, and you know what I'll do I'll wait one more week for the schedules not much of a threat by you. I need schedules, man Huh, I did I read incorrectly that it's my homes and Lamar Jackson week one Are they just got it sing a little game of the year, but they're they're releasing Little nugget just a little bit that little thing yeah, I Love a pivotal game five

Andrew Nemhor is that his name? Yes. Has as many moments as Reggie Miller. A group of people I don't like? Joggers. Stop showing off. What, they're just exercising. What they do to you.

I think Jessica's a jogger, isn't she? I can't stand them. I thought you meant like Yar Amir, like his family. The Yagers. The things you do driving around the Midwest on a gummy in the passenger seat. Top five groups I don't like. Journalists. That was number five.

That was. Number that was number four cyclist Number three the Beatles Overrated Right, yeah, yeah, yeah overrated good take to joggers not the yoggers And number one the Jets I didn't scratch it off, and I'm not gonna skip it. Nuggets T-Wolves Why wouldn't you skip it? The series that keeps starting Why why wouldn't you skip it? The only thing that could save the Knicks season is the Mecca

The only thing that could save the Knicks season is the Mecca His brain doesn't work fast enough the B and Bruin stands for Boston is on the brink Anthony Edwards blah blah blah He just scored what he's 43 and lost two straight at home, but that's why you don't compare in the Michael Jordan You don't do it. That's why you don't do it. Because it's an unfair comparison that quite frankly Anthony Edwards wants nothing to do with. I'm not doing this for Anthony Edwards. I'm not blasting him. I'm blasting the media. Leave the poor kid alone. Let him develop. He's going to go through some growing pains.

Because Michael Jordan never, ever, ever, would have lost two straight at home in the playoffs. Ever. Scoring 43 or whatever isn't a growing pain. How about the game before that? Okay. Less than 20. Excellent work by you. The one he most recently played set a franchise record for the Timberwolves for the playoff score. We lost.

Okay. Great news for Bears fans. They no longer have to pencil in Caleb Williams as their starter. They can use ink. They announced it. Indiana Pacers, congratulations on holding serve. If I seem a bit frazzled, we have no water. The AC is broken in the studio.

You're about to run out of music. And it's hot as hell in here. Speaking of hell-harp riles, Dan, those are the weekend observations.