The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz - Hour 1: Hawk's Lying Uncle

Episode Date: April 1, 2025

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lowest price guaranteed. As an aside a quick PSA to our audience I have received word this morning that Poppy's Domino Tournament has been postponed. So if you purchase tickets to that event, don't worry, we will take care of that. You'll be issued refunds in the coming days. You'll hear about more information on that and when there will be a new date. Game Domino. I feel like that should be their slogan or something. It was at one point. They need to send the copy. You got to go get Ray Lewis to do it though.

Like he's the only time, he's the only one who can deliver. That wasn't even his, was it? He did it the best. It wasn't his? Wasn't the Bulls? Nah. No? I thought it was Ray.

I know Ray was All My Dogs in the House, right? He might've used Game Time. That was Baja Men. Yeah, that was definitely the Baja Men. I mean, it's all copyright issues. No, no, no, no. The Baja Men are the exact opposite was definitely the Baja Men. I mean, it's all copyright issues. No, no, no, no. The Baja Men are the exact opposite of all my dogs in the house.

The Baja Men were concerned about who let all the dogs out of their house. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Can I ask you something about houses really quick, just because you mentioned it, and I feel like we're not gonna get back to it. You just said that when you had a cat sitter at your house and your cat would scurry about

and go sneak the food that the cat sitter thought, oh that's just one of those house noises. And we all just kind of like moved on. That's like one of the weirdest things we do as like a society, right? Is like we just like, there's noises in your house and you're like, ah, it's just a house noise. And it's really just cause like,

I don't wanna deal with whatever that noise is. So as long as I don't know what it is and it doesn't sound like it's too serious, that's just a house noise and we're not gonna address that. It's creaking, it's the changing temperature. I think this explains it, right? It's like the change in temperature, it's wood and whatever expanding and contracting,

and so you want me to go find where it is contracted and heat up that portion of the house? No, I'm just saying, I feel like there's so much going on that there's a certain level of sound that you like just Allow to occur you're like I don't really need to know I was gonna I was gonna let you off the hook Billy, but yeah We need to know what your uber rating is because you seem like you he's growing up in nice houses He's growing up in such nice houses that they don't have creeks. Meanwhile. No, it's just there's always one temperature down here

So wood doesn't get colder or hotter and everything's's like concrete too. As much as I love your value, the value you bring to the show with these interesting non sequiturs, I imagine that this is not a bit, this is you all the time. And so when you're riding in Ubers, you probably annoy the hell out of your driver because you're like, hey.

Well, okay, I don't like the way you're setting this up at all. I was thinking today, just walking in. It was his strategy today, don't take it. I was walking in today just thinking because I saw someone doing something. I'm like, that person's kind of weird, right? And then I thought, well, to that person,

they're normal, right? And I'm weird. So I'm positive. Was it me? No, it wasn't you, it wasn't you. Are you sure? Look me in my eyes and promise me it wasn't you. No, it wasn't you. No, it wasn't you.

So it was someone that was like running down the street, like going for a jog, doing something, and I was like, that's some kind of weird behavior that this person has. And I feel like- Was jogging was weird? No, no, no. It was a particular,

we don't need to get bogged down by this. So, the point is, I saw it, I was like, that person's weird, but to that person, what they're doing is totally normal. And I feel like that's the case for everyone, right? Like weird people don't know they're weird. They just think that to them, because of their circumstances, what they're doing is totally normal. And I feel like that's the case for everyone, right? Like weird people don't know they're weird. They just think that to them, because of their circumstances,

what they're doing is completely justifiable and not weird whatsoever. It's possible. I feel like sometimes I know if I'm doing something weird and I know it's weird, but you haven't told us what they were doing. You said they were running down the street. Like if they were in-

I don't wanna say what it was because maybe the person works here. It was me, wasn't it? It wasn't you though. Okay, now you got to. Anyways, my rating is a 4.91. Woo! Yeah, I'm not proud of it.

That's good. It was a five for the longest time, but here's the thing, I don't use Uber all that much. I only pretty much use it when I'm out of town. Like if I'm in town, I drive everywhere. That's not a good thing though, because the more times you use it, the higher the number goes.

No. Yes. The justification that it would be lower because you're basically exposed to more drivers who might understand what you do is weird versus what they think a rider should be. No, but can I tell you why? So a few means that like, mm.

No, it means one bad score really throws it off. If I get a three, then it throws off my five average. I was at a five forever, then I looked at it, it was like 4.8 something, I was like, what happened here? If you get a three, you only had five rides. Can you track it back to that one ride? I did. You know what you did.

No, I know what happened. I didn't do anything, in my opinion. This is what happened. I was in Washington, D.C. Great city. I was going around, we were checking out the monuments, whatever, right? Because of where we were,

we got an Uber and then the person couldn't find where we were, I guess there was like closures or whatever, so the person had to do like multiple loops around. Then it was raining, so we were standing behind this column, then they couldn't find us and it became this whole thing and I was like, I'm sorry that I'm in an inconvenient spot, but I'm a tourist, I don't know where I'm supposed to be. So then I went back and I found that I got a three

on that ride and I was very upset because I gave the person a five even though they kept us waiting in the rain for a very long time. Now, I have a strategy on Uber. Because I know that I can be weird, as you have described me. You said I'm weird. You have weird non sequiturs, which I appreciate.

Well, this is what I'll do. I'll never hit the option to not talk to me, right? But what I do is I play the game, and it's weird in the sense that like, so I'm the one that's being driven around, but I am catering to the driver the majority of the time. Like I try to get the vibe of the driver based on the music that they're playing, based on if they're starting a conversation with me, based on if they're talking of the time. I try to get the vibe of the driver based on the music that they're playing,

based on if they're starting a conversation with me, based on if they're talking on the phone. I try to see what kind of experience the driver wants to have and then I try to provide that experience for the driver just for this rating that doesn't matter because again, I pretty much only use it when I'm on vacation. So if it's been a quiet ride

because we haven't spoken much, right? What I'll do is I always end on a positive note. So when I know we're like three or four blocks away. Like thank you. No, no, no, no, no. When I know we're like three or four blocks away, the information that I have taken in while I've been in the seat,

I figure out what is like the simplest, like softball, small talk conversation that I can start with this person that I know will go favorable for them. And I show interest in what I've experienced them doing. So one time when we were, I don't know, we were in Chicago or whatever, right? We're driving around, it's pretty quiet most of the time,

and it was a Tesla that I got picked up in, right? And I have not been in a Tesla before, especially not an Uber, right? So then I start talking and I'm, you know, you like this Tesla? Because I know Tesla drivers love talking about Teslas, right? So like I waited a little bit. I'm like, how do you like this Tesla? Like, I've never been to it. He's like, Oh, I love it. I'm like, yeah, it's kind of cool in here. He's like, how do you charge? You have a charger at home? You go, no, I go here. I do this. I'm like, how long does it take? So I just start talking

to him about his Tesla because I know that's what the Tesla driver really wants to talk about. I'd have gave you a one star for that. No way, the guy loved it. How do I charge it? No, chargers, guys, no, some people have home chargers, some people have to go to charging stations, and when you go to the charging station, you have to wait an extended amount of time.

This guy, in case you were wondering, which you're not, this guy didn't have a home charger because he lived in an apartment. So he'd have to go somewhere and I was like, well how many miles do you get when you charge it? How often do you charge it? I just get into what I think they want to talk about. I start observing them and then I ask them questions on the way out. One time when we were in Austin. You're a.9 boy, that's good enough. You're in the.9 boy crew. Yeah. You want to be a fiver what you want to get it up though

Here's the thing once you're not a fiverr. You can never be a fiverr I don't know do we have the list before because I want to know where he places and did we get one from? Amin and anybody else I do I have them I have Dom you were only to I'm unsure of you two you were 4.9 Dom and you were 478 478 I was a I was a 492 Mike 475 let's go Jess 5.0. Yeah, Roy 497 there we go Charlie 487 all right so now I have two updates for us, okay? Tony's a 49 flat which is a little surprising I'm embarrassed yeah for the 49 club and then a me

I texted a mean as I scrolled through my text now, this is not great on air. So let me ask you something, the lower numbers, I'm assuming it's always someone else's fault, right? No one took responsibility. Everyone's always like, oh, my friends. We found out yesterday that Lucy had a dot, how old did Lucy have?

She had a really good one, but she's- 496, she had two charges of $250 for throwing up in the Uber. She's thrown up in two- That she remembered. They couldn't have been on her account. There's no chance. Yeah, those were someone else's account. That has to have been a group of friends

that someone else got. There's no way that you've thrown up in a car and you have it that high. Twice. Twice, that's crazy. So Amin, he texted me. I said, what's your Uber rating? He said 4.86, but that's with the black tax.

So I am probably a 4.91, all else being equal. That's valid. I'll take it. I didn't wanna go into that, but I can tell when I get into Uber if this guy likes black people or not. Almost immediately. I can too sometimes and I'm not even black.

You're not even. And then how do you start that conversation? My once on the radio. Now that we're here, finally. Yeah, yeah. It was like, hey. That's the first thing I thought of when you said, I try to end it favorably for them.

I'm like, you slide a little racism in there on the way out, don't you? A little bit. You just open a window. Just to get that Uber rating up. You crack the door. It's one of my ice cream, it's Obama, huh? And then I see which way they go,

and then I know which way to finish with. Appreciate you speaking English. So someone who is not getting a good rating, at least not from John Moran, is Taylor Jenkins. I want to get into this conversation. He got fired from the Grizzlies who were in third place and had a really good record there, considered a Western conference contender. It was kind of a shocking, probably would have been the most shocking thing. I guess. The vote on the tush push has been tabled.

Ah, boo. Back to you. So this probably would have been the most shocking thing in the NBA season if it wasn't for the fact that Luga got traded. But like having Taylor Jenkins, a winning coach on a team that seems to be heading in the right direction and a respected X and O's coach be fired by his team just before the playoffs, I think 15 games out of the playoffs while they're playing well in third place, blew

my mind. I think some reporting has come out since. Yeah. So the background on this is they cleared house of their assistant coaches this off season and the new offense ran fewer ball screens and John Morant in this system was not happy with his fewest touches, fewest points, fewest shot attempts per game in several years.

He's also a considerably worse player than he was three years ago. Shooting the ball, significantly worse. And it creates a really interesting situation. You have a good coach, you have John Morant who, regardless of how absurd the NBA suspension and over the top was for his off the court stuff a couple years ago, he's still an unstable superstar

because he doesn't play and he's not a consistent scorer because he can't shoot the basketball, he hasn't been consistent in the post season. You guys, is it right in the NBA superstar culture to let that guy in that city change that coach. Yeah, the reporting is that he's out because John didn't like the changes to the implied. It's not explicitly said, but the implication is that he wasn't happy with his role in the new offense.

They're trying to figure out the reasons why. It's not the reason why John's not John, man. You got to let that bird free, man. You got to let him. You you gotta give him a weekend. That's Dennis Rod, you gotta give him a weekend in South Beach, man. I wanted to ask Steve Williams that about Tiger. You gotta let him do what they do, man. Steve Williams looked straight in the eye

and said Tiger had no off field distract. That's great, I didn't wanna say it. That's why I wanted to give grace to Neek, man, because we're gonna take accountability, which Steve went on record, he is not for. He is not for workplace accountability. I'm like, okay, we're just breezing over everything at this point.

The idea of the superstar of the NBA having enough power to fire a coach is not new. It doesn't bother me that Taylor Jenkins got run because the superstar wanted him out. I don't know that banking on that superstar, and I think this is what you're alluding to, Charlie, is that John Morant is not a reliable superstar and he's not the level of superstar that you want to give this power to, but he's the guy in that city. And it just speaks to me about being a head coach in basketball or being anyone in the basketball organization.

I ran into this argument oftentimes when people wanna be critical of teams that were constructed around LeBron and say, well, don't blame the GM because LeBron's actually the GM. Maybe he is, but your job as the GM is to convince LeBron. You know, like you would have thought that at one point your job is to build a roster,

but now your job is getting a little harder when there's someone in your organization who has as much power and influence as a superstar player. Your job now becomes to sell LeBron, convince LeBron it was his idea, or figure out a way, and I feel the same way about this offense with Taylor Jenkins. And so if Taylor gets fired because Jai's not happy, maybe you wish Jai would have handled this differently.

But ultimately, as a head coach, when you're a head coach of an NBA team and you guys have a superstar, I'm not saying you have to kowtow to the superstar, but you have to take into account that whatever you're doing, the first person, and maybe the only person who's buy-in you have to get off the top is the superstar,

and it doesn't matter how good your idea is. I don't give a shit how innovative your offense is. If you ain't convinced him that it's innovative and it's gonna help you out, then you lost. It's this age old problem in sports where you think the title puts you in charge or you think the talent sometimes puts you in charge. When I was playing receiver in the league

and I had other receivers and they were like, man, you're so happy being the fourth. I'm like, I'm not happy being the fourth receiver, bro. I know what I make. Like this is the most I can be looking at the contracts. And you, arguing for touches as an undrafted free agent on special teams, that ain't how this works, my boy. You gotta follow the money trail.

So even looking at Coach Jenkins and what you make a year versus what job makes a year, it is not more important for what your strategy is. It only fits in that way of how it pertains to the main investment which is job Moran. And also you might not have even done anything from your perspective, the warrant being fired or whatever, but from an organizational standpoint we've invested this in the job Moran, even if it is like hey maybe this doesn't work out, maybe he'll never be the same player. We gotta remove some of the factors

to see if that's the case. And I'm okay with moving away three to $5 million a year to save the $50 million a year that I'm giving this player. And the NBA superstar is the NFL quarterback in that you can't win without one. And even if Jai is not the perfect one, he's the closest thing you got to it. And there are lots of teams that are looking

for somebody like that. So you thinking that you can, and I'm not suggesting that Taylor Jenkins is like, man, I don't need to convince Jai, I'll figure this out, but ultimately, whether he's doing that consciously or not, not having him believe in his plan is essentially doing that. And the point that you made about being

the number four receiver, and they say you show up to practice happy even though you not getting no balls, I can't afford not to be. I can't afford. I cannot, yeah, I'm in no position to come in here and try to wave it around and tell people what I am and am not gonna do, although I'm not returning no points. I don't care what you say.

Me neither. I've won records saying I'm not returning. I've told head coaches, hey, no, you go back there and return it. Yeah, I don't know what happens with the Grizzlies going forward. I don't think that they were like a real, like legitimate title contender top of the league, even though they were third place. No one was really considering what Jai and that team was going to do relative to the real top dogs, I think, in the West.

But the future of that organization, I think, is still dependent on John Morant, no matter what, and finding some sort of way to build something, to hire someone and build something that he believes in and he's going to buy into is their only way of going forward, even if Taylor Jenkins is the smartest new coach on the scene. Is that the toughest spot for an NBA team to be in though, where you don't want to trade someone that talented because if you trade him somewhere, it's like he could be a 38 and five guy on a random team. But if you keep him and he's entitled to thinking he's in charge of the organization, you might just be a first round buy every single year for a higher seed.

It's tough. That's like having a quarterback who's like the 13th best quarterback. You're like, ah, he's good enough to start, but am I going to win anything? To a? Yes, actually. You're like, ah, he's good enough to start, but am I gonna win anything?

Tua? Yes, actually. Yeah, the alternatives at that position are tough, and it's impossible to find the perfect quarterback for your situation, but you wouldn't move on from Tua. And I think Jai is probably a higher version than Tua, but that's not the perfect. Do you think he has a better arm than him?

Jabberwine. Yeah. Straight up, if they started the goal line. That's so disrespectful. Do you think you can throw a football further? Absolutely? No, I do there's no way I'm tall as John 6'3. Yeah He's bendy Elastic arm he can whip it. You know, he doesn't look like one of those dudes who's just good at every sport He is an incredible athlete, but there's no way he can throw it farther than Tua. There's no way. I mean, I think farther is like we see the long ball drivers guys, like they're not better

golfers than real golfers. Bro, there's no way. We just got done talking about how you get disrespected every time someone even remotely insinuates. That they could athlete better. That they could outdo you at something that you did for money. Hey audience, you know it's that time of year where everyone is debating who the number one pick is going to be. Well let me tell you something that is undebatable. Who the world's number one vodka is.

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Lite pretty much anywhere they sell beer. Tastes like Miller Time. Celebrate responsibly, Miller Brewing Company Milwaukee, Wisconsin, 96 calories, 3.2 carbs per 12 ounces. Don LeBou-tard. Photography's not as hard as it's made out to be. And now with computers, I mean, you can make anything look like anything, Dan. It's almost cheating.

It's not fair. If you push a button and it takes a thousand pictures, you're gonna find a good one in the batch. There were a lot of photographers there taking a thousands of pictures. One got that photograph. Okay, good retort. Stugats.

Haven't you ever passed by photographers? Ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch tch Let's talk in that. That goofy ass out of here tell him, oh he ain't faster than not near me or Hawk. That's not, I have an update from ChatGPT and now Hawk, I know this is a sorted history between you and ChatGPT. ChatGPT? Come on. But Ja Morant, according to ChatGPT, can reportedly throw a football about 70 yards. What? Wow.

There have been clips of him launching deep passes during warmups and off season workouts, showing off his impressive arm strength. Wow. Do they have him mixed up with Aunt Edwards? The chat GP? It definitely knows that John Morant is a basketball player. Wow.

Yeah. I support, I think that plays right into what I was saying is like, I would not say that John Morant is a better quarterback. Like I obviously these long ball driver guys are not better golfers. But like, if you ask him to do this very simple thing, he's a taller guy, whippy athleticism, big hands. Like, yeah, I feel like Jacka launched that thing. Now, is he gonna be more accurate? Is he gonna be a better decision maker?

Of course not. Well, definitely not a better decision maker. It's not quite known for that. But I also don't think he can throw it further. I asked Chad GPT for proof. And it was prepared for that question. While specific measurements of John Moran's football throwing distance aren't publicly documented,

his athletic prowess suggests he possesses significant arm strength. For instance, during a game against the Knicks on February 28th, Morant attempted a full court shot throwing the basketball approximately 94 feet. This action resulted in a technical foul. What are we doing, Chad? It's 31 yards.

What the hell are we doing? Yeah. And now you're spreading this folklore. I'm sorry. That people are taking and running with it. It's harder to throw a basketball. Yeah, it is harder to throw a basketball. Are we kidding right now?

You think he's the first athlete 6'3"? No. That doesn't mean you can throw a basketball at him. Are we kidding right now? You think he's the first athlete 6'3"? No. That doesn't mean you can throw a football 70 yards. I think what I- Because he can do crazy windmills. I appreciate the chat DPT support, but I'm not sure that I really, we're gonna use it.

It was like, yeah, he's documented, he can throw a football far. Show it to me. Well, we don't really have a video, per se. But remember that game against the Knicks? Shut up, chat GPD, you sound like my Uncle Rick. Oh, you got an uncle name, don't start with that. He just makes stuff up, man.

Like he literally just, yeah, he could do this back in my day, like Rick, you're lying, bro. Uncle Rick probably hates the internet. Uncle Rick was getting them lies off. Forever. Uncle Rick been getting them lies off until Forever. Uncle Rick been getting them lies off till the early 2000s when people had phones with the internet. You wouldn't believe the archives I've had to go into

to prove Uncle Rick wrong, because he thinks I don't have access to newspapers. Well, I feel like that still doesn't stop Uncle Rick though. It doesn't stop Uncle Rick. Apparently we have a photo of the guy that says he could beat you guys in a race. If you guys wanna throw up that photo of Taylor. He ran track.

Why are you laughing, man? What? He's running for North Carolina. That doesn't mean anything to you as a Maryland Terp, but to me who grew up wanting to play for North Carolina. He has a baton, so he's on some team of sorts. Yeah. On some relay.

That's a, I mean, that's probably, that's a 400 guy. That's a 800 guy. You might beat me in a 400, 800. Riding on Taylor in the one. You think you can ride him in the one? Headband's wild, yeah. The headband is crazy. Especially because he has like a buzz cut.

Yeah, yeah. Let's be serious about this, guys. Let's break this down. Especially since he wasn't in like the headband era. Like how old is Taylor? That's a wild look. Like the headband era was like 2001. You know that.

There's no way that this was then. Which you also know and for the listening audience, Taylor has good arm definition, which like suggests that maybe he's a pretty good athlete. I respect that he's an above average athlete. So racially ambiguous. That can. So racially ambiguous.

What? What? I'm even more confused now. I would also think Italian say that's like a Greek last name. Like a night to sell the headbands. Like let's just put someone right dab in the middle. This is a Mike Torey co situation. I see some in Bop, a little Bob's got some Bob's. The top is baggy Man, which suggested me that the equipment manager didn't respect him,

which means he was a slow guy on the team. I'm sorry, Taylor. I know as a third-round rookie, my jersey never looked worse. I don't know what's happening right now. This is the lightest I've ever seen his complexion. And he's outside running outdoor track. But it's also the blackest he's ever looked. Yeah.

How in the world do you got an indoor season complexion on the outdoor season track? He says it's so pissed right now. Why he pissed? He doesn't like when he's not racially ambiguous. The guy in the green back there that he's beating very clearly tells me this was like a B team. I don't even know what is that that guy's just wearing a jersey that's a Jason doesn't say Babson say what you and see race Babson Taylor this is not

helping you man I hope that they look this up I hope you didn't look this up somebody go mouse he for sure sent this to them I hope you didn't send this to them thinking that this was gonna scare me. Is that George Mason? Or a guy named Mason? I don't think, George Mason would it be the George on top? It would be. That's a astute observation, dog. It looks like Mason George.

Maybe there's a G, maybe there's a G on the far side that we can't see. I've never been more confident in my life than I would ride on this kid. Yeah. Get outta here. I don't know. You probably paid to run too.

Are you a scholarship athlete? Did they call you up? Did they send you a letter? Or you showed up and knocked on the doors like, hey, excuse me. Excuse me. I hate to discriminate against, as a former walk-on,

I don't wanna discriminate against the walk-ons. However. Because some of us do have talent. Right. But, this does point to, it is not Taylor so much. It is the guy beside him. Because in a 400, his neck shouldn't be back that far.

That looks like a distance runner. That's a distance runner's demeanor. And body style, like that guy. This feels like a four by one or like a four by eight. This might be a four by eight situation. This is a slow race, My guy got them glasses on. That guy. The glasses is the thing.

And those are Rexbecks, for sure. How bad your vision got to be that you can't stay between the lines? We not asking you to catch nothing, bruh. How bad your vision got to be that you got to wear glasses to run straight. Goodness, Taylor. Who are you running against? I like my chances against Taylor in the 100.

I did run a 100 last year. Nice, why? This is a look at me, Louis situation. Cause it was the same thing. I'm like, I wanna see what this is about. You ran all out? I did tweak my hamstrings. I absolutely did.

It put me out. I have not run since. It was in July. Good for you. But I did run an 11.6. Damn, that's solid at 39 years old. That's more than solid. Thank you, sir. That is very impressive at 39 years old. Taylor, you don't stand a chizzance.

While we're catching up on the athletic ability of people around here, we have a video also of Tony playing some league basketball. There's Tony shooting a three, making a three. Apparently this is a highlight reel, so it's all gonna be good plays. There's some in the corner. Bang. Apparently this is a highlight reel, so it's all gonna be good plays. There's some in the corner.

Why are we showing this on a day he's not here? We're just laying down. No, I wanna see. I wanna see what we're working with. Hold on, hold on, hold on. A little dish, a little give and go. Hold on, again, Tony, whatever. Look at the people he's playing against.

There's a dude on the court with a pink satin do-rag. It's the same guy on the track photo. You can't, with a satin do-rag on.'t whoop whoop with a satin durag on. Get out of here. He got a stroke though. That also looks like a very much younger Tony. I mean he's a catch and shoot player, that's fine. That's the same point in a one on one situation.

Uh huh. Can you create? He's tall. Can you create and can you stop me from getting to the cup? If you ain't 7'6", like he gotta be like- He was the tallest player on that court. And you know where he was at? Corner. They relegated the biggest player to the,

hey, they saw him play, it was like, hey, you know what, stand over there. Me and Satin do rag, gonna run a two man game. And if they help off of it, then you got an open shot. Stand over there. So you guys, Hawk and Fox, ran the exact same 40 time at the combine. How about that?

4.34 guys. That's crazy. Who's running a race right now? That's real speed. Oh Hawk is running a race. Not today. You know, I mean, I- My back situation, I have not run since July.

I can't tell you who's gonna win. I'll tell you who will lose and his name is Taylor. If we were to run a race that that um Again because all right it does I mean we could deduce Is that place what was that guy in first place? He's cut or is this or is that an official very bad? Hold on I can guarantee you that Jason is not in second place. So if you're telling me that Taylor's in first place, that means Jason is second place.

He's all the way on the most inner lane, right? Taylor's on the most inside lane. And Jason, so this is 7-8 territory. We're looking at Taylor got seventh place. Unless he's being lapped. I'm telling you, he be getting like second place in like heat three and that's fine. Yeah The football team so he's a two-sport athlete well at North Carolina Yeah, which is factual. It's factual. That's factual So it's not like he was putting everything into track the tough thing is you said he's a two sport athlete at Carolina three days after I ran into Julius Peppers

in Colorado. You want to talk about it, two sport athlete. How dare you put Taylor in the same conversation. He's on the medal stand. As, huh? Yeah, Ronald Curry. Ronald Curry, Taylor Vipulis. Three.

Julius Peppers, man. I feel like Julius Peppers and like Miles Garrett like guys like that. It's a different category of human. Yeah. Like you were talking about phylums earlier. That's a phylum that Taylor don't need to get nowhere near. Are we counting Michael Jordan as a Tar Heel two-sport athlete? What other sport did he play? Baseball but not for the school. No, that doesn't, no. He didn't play for their baseball team right I don't think so maybe yeah we're not we're not giving him the two sport

he has everything else so Taylor's a better two-sport athlete than Michael Jordan in North Carolina history for sure he's not he is not feeling is the roof certainly more accomplished maybe Mary Marion Jones didn't she do track in basketball yeah yeah I got the medal sand out there incredible athlete but you're still on the Mount Rushmore. Yeah. You know what Taylor does around here, one of his most important jobs, boldest take?

I was just thinking about the boldest take. Can we get it? I've heard Dan give the listeners a lot of hell about how bad this stuff is. I actually really like it. I think the last few weeks they brought it strong. The Boost Mobile boldest take from the weekend is presented by Boost Mobile, the newest 5G network in the country.

So let's see what they got this week. We should not be making not dishwasher safe products anymore. I'll hang up and listen. Hey, this is Richard. I just got out of a lunch with my sister-in-law. Bold Take, you get one basic modification to your meal. After that, you're an a**hole. You say, hey, no pickle or no onion.

Add tomato, whatever the heck. You get one. Anything after one, you're a piece of a**hole. My boldest take from the weekend is that the Tootsie Roll song is way more popular than the Tootsie Roll candy. Provolone cheese is the superior at all-purpose sandwich cheese. Put it on a cheeseburger, cold turkey sandwich, it goes with any kind of sandwich. Hey, this is Jeremy from Auburn. I'm gonna do Bobby from King of the Hill, Limited Fake. Dad!

Yeah, this is Jahan from Oklahoma, and I'm just gonna say, quit calling it a luncheon. It's just a lunch. Get over yourself. Deep Dish Pizza is closer to lasagna than it is to real pizza. To William from Winter Park, and this is my Limited Fake Mickey Mouse.

Oh, boy! Hey there, it's Bobby from Arizona. I was looking at some very early pre-draft rankings of players and I was wondering how in the hell Rutgers has two players that are expected to be picked in the top five in the NBA draft. Yet somehow they managed to have a 15 and 17 record this year in the Big Ten. Yeah he's not the only one asking that question. It's a damn good question. I am Somehow they managed to have a 15 and 17 record this year in the Big Ten. Yeah, he's not the only one asking that question.

It's a damn good question. I am done with luncheon. Like, why do we call it a luncheon? Yeah, I don't know. It's just lunch. I mean, there has to be some reason. I haven't spelled right. Yeah, there has to be some reason why.

It should be lunch in, like dine in. It's a French word or something. Is that what it is? Onchon. Onchon. Onchon. That is one of the easiest ways to get a laugh in the history of the world.

Is door to fridge accent? Oh, it's great. I don't mean it as a judgment. It's perfect. I've never not laughed with someone hon hon on the end of their phrase. Well, I mean, Kenan Thompson literally made a career out of it, you know, as escargot we don't speak of that

We don't speak that name We can't learn from it we turn on Kenan because of yesterday I love Kenan I'm just joking we never Tina and Cal such a good show. I didn't even I didn't even get into that I was like really him like push where he wanted to go. I wanted to list my favorite Kenan sketches. I wanted to do impersonations, but I didn't wanna disrespect him. Call him up, get him back on. Get him back on.

Do it. Yeah, I think he seemed like he enjoyed it. No, he's not coming on. He's like, is that standard there, Phil? After Mike disrespected Gerd the way that he did to end the interview. In the interview. In the interview you said something negative about GERD?

No, I was like, you know, I wanted to say GERD. It was funny and I thought, let me try to make it lighter. I'm like, did you ever think you'd go from being a teenager on all that to doing media hits about GERD? That also implies that you failed at life too. No! I won't stand for it. No, I meant it as like, wow, you've been

in entertainment for so long. Like that, that'll tell you like you're hitting 40, right? I will not stand for the Mike disrespect because, I mean, not disrespect. I was standing for the disrespect. I will not sit for the Mike criticism because as we established, I couldn't get the ball up the court and Mike was not expecting to have to get the ball up. He was trying. So that's on me. We've accepted accountability for that a number of times. But lasagna, deep dish pizza, accurate take.

Like lasagna, deep dish pizza is delicious. But it's weird calling it pizza because it is much closer to lasagna than it is to pizza. That's all the fixings. Disagree. And still, I mean, that's like, lots of different foods have the same components, but it doesn't, if you put them together differently, they become a different food.

You're talking about like a wrap and salad? Yeah, you don't call a salad wrap a salad wrap, you call it a wrap. Salad sandwich, you should call it. They do call them Caesar wraps, though. Yeah, Caesar. Is a Caesar wrap a salad? No.

Makes you think. No, Caesar wrap's a Caesar wrap. What is Caesar's connection to that salad? Has anybody figured that out? I assume it's the dressing they probably invented or originated, the dressing. Also, how did Caesar get the haircut? Get a fresh Caesar? Yeah, there's a lot of things going on.

Those are the biggest influences in the history of the empire. I feel like we had a nice lead in this third quarter. We're still up. No, we're still up. No, we're just- We're cutting down to single digits. We're moving the ball around. We're killing clock. We took a little last shot. Wait till y'all see this fourth quarter though. The Caesar Salad, a beloved dish, originated in Tijuana, Mexico at Caesar Cardini's restaurant in 1924.

Yep. So it has nothing to do with Julius Caesar. Nah. Weather is starting to warm up. Regular season starting to wind down. Games of consequence in sports starting to ramp up. I know what you're going to need by your side.

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