The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz - Hour 1: Nobody Wants To Eat a Wet Banana

Episode Date: January 13, 2025

The Meadowlark Media crew was finally able to close the loop on something: there is a new Pat Riley statue atop the Elser looking down at the Miami Heat's arena across the street. Billy explains why h...e was frustrated with NFL Network yesterday and Dan and Stu have dueling Stats of the Day. Then, Greg Cote takes us through some classic Greg-isms before educating the group on Ruth and Nellie Doogie, eating a peck of dirt before you die, and why it's okay to rinse off a banana that's fallen. Plus, Jessica saw celebrities in New York, Greg Cote saw valet guys crash into each other, there's nothing better than a FAST channel, and "it's Columbo time." Also, is Justin Herbert an all-time great QB like Jim Harbaugh says? And is Nick Sirianni the greatest Eagles coach of all-time like Stugotz says? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Starting point is 00:00:00 You're listening to Giraffe King's Network. Wi-Fi, 15% off all Hilton brands. I never go anywhere without T-Mobile. Same goes from a water bottle, chewing gum, nail clippers. Okay, I'm gonna leave you to it. Find out how you can experience travel better at tmobile.com slash travel. Qualifying plan required. Wi-Fi were available on select US airlines, deposit and Hilton Honors membership required for 15% discount terms and conditions apply.
Starting point is 00:00:41 Get groceries delivered across the GTA from real Canadian superstore with PC Express. Shop online for super prices and super apply. Get groceries delivered across the GTA from real Canadian Superstore with PC Express. Shop online for super prices and super savings. Try it today and get up to $75 in PC optimum points. Visit superstore.ca to get started. This is the Dan Lebatard Show with the StuGuts Podcast. This episode of the Dan Lebatard Show with Stu Gotz is presented by Venmo. I came very close last night to having an incredible bad beat story because I'm chasing at the end of the day and I'm having the general sadness of, good god, you've got to be kidding
Starting point is 00:01:23 me, I'm watching the Utah Brooklyn basketball game. Ah! Ah! But the game is tied late. I don't know, did you guys see this? Utah's obviously terrible. Brooklyn's terrible, though inexplicably. Brooklyn, on a West Coast road trip earlier this year,
Starting point is 00:01:40 like one at Sacramento, Golden State, and Phoenix. That's when you thought they were good, right? I remember that. That was last year that I thought they were good when they weren't good. You learn your lesson. Yes, they are not good. They are decidedly not good.
Starting point is 00:01:53 But at the end of that game yesterday, you've got a tie game. And it's only tied because Utah doesn't have any good players and their lead is leaking because they can't get any good shots the last two minutes of the game because they don't have anybody who can get good shots when the game tightens up at the end of the game. And they've got the ball tie game 26 seconds left, okay?
Starting point is 00:02:17 26 so you're not going to lose this game in regulation. You've got the ball you're inbounding with twenty six seconds left shot clocks twenty four but still i'm just laying it out there i got all all of them and i think the detail here's what happens though sexton and collier are arguing as they come up the court about who should bring the ball up the court may do it so slowly that they get a second violation while the ball back to Brooklyn. That's the jazz.
Starting point is 00:02:47 Because they're walking down the court and they're like, they're not agreeing on who should bring it up. We have an update on the Lamar Smith follow-up game to that 200 yarder, the last Dolphins playoff win. We gave you the stats from his performance against the Oakland Raiders at the time, but there is a great detail.
Starting point is 00:03:07 So he had eight carries for five yards in that game. I've now learned, thanks to Taylor out there crunching the numbers, he had an 11 yard run in that game, which means the other seven carries were for negative six years. Just a little detail, a little update there. Thank you, I do appreciate it. That registers as one of the great
Starting point is 00:03:24 Dolphin highlights of this century. a little update there. Thank you, I do appreciate it. That registers is one of the great dolphin highlights of this century. We've got a number of things to get to. Stu Gotts' weekend observations are gonna be at some point in the next two hours. We've gotta unveil finally our statue. We said we were going to make a statue here at the Elser, put it on the roof, something that pointed down
Starting point is 00:03:44 at the arena of Pat Riley to reverse course on my criticism from early in the week where I was saying that Pat Riley had failed and all Metal Arc resources have been poured into. Pointing, look, if you look right now. What are we doing? If you look right now. I told them, I gave them.
Starting point is 00:04:04 Finally closing a loop this company. This was the big unveiling. This is good. Not even the roof. We did it. It looks like a carrot. You can see the arena right behind him. It's a great shot.
Starting point is 00:04:14 Were we not allowed on the roof? Is that what happened? We just stopped halfway to the roof and just put one of those car sale inflatable men. Wacky inflatable armed man thank you the technical term plus the Gus when he had that high up it's just totally what a tape job because it's really windy up yeah really so that's not a bronze statue then no is that what I'm okay does look
Starting point is 00:04:38 more like him than the Dwayne Wade statue. It really does, that is true. Nailed the face. Nailed the face. Yeah, took all on him, yeah. Let's play the start of the day music here, please. Start of the day, start of the day, it is the start of the day. Start of the day, start of the day, it is the start of the day. Start of the day, start of the day, it is the start of the day. Start of the day, start of the day, start of the day, start of the day, it is the start of the day, start of the day,
Starting point is 00:05:07 start of the day, it is the start of the day. This is from Barstool Sports. I knew it, but I didn't remember it, and I had to be reminded of it yesterday. Mike Vrabel has 10, he was a linebacker, 10 career receptions. All of them for touchdowns. Wow. Wow. It's a good stat. It's a great stat.
Starting point is 00:05:46 That's crazy. That's insane. 10 for 10, huh? My guess is that you can find some decent players on offense that don't have 10 touchdowns. I just saw McBride have like 100 catches for Arizona and it took him till the last two weeks of the season to get his first touchdown.
Starting point is 00:06:03 Do you have a dueling stat of the season to get his first First touchdown. Do you have a dueling stat of the day that you think can beat that stat of the day Stu guys? I do do you want the imaging again or do we just do it right here? No, right here is fine Marcus Freeman has more wins against top five teams in the last ten days than James Franklin has in 14 years Which is conference than James Franklin has in 14 years. Yeah. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha good thanks for nothing stats no less 10 days they're both exceptionally good Smith agreed Craig you gotta pick a side you can't it's like can't be a tie what's the point of doing that what's the point of being an arbiter if you're just gonna sit there and have no judgment okay then the winning stat is Marcus Freeman versus pens you're just lashing out at me for making you do it did that the consequences Sore loser take the results move on really Billy. Why are you mad at the NFL Network?
Starting point is 00:07:12 Mad is harsh, but they played a dirty trick on everybody yesterday I don't know if you guys saw put it on the pole juju do you get mad at dirty tricks? I mean a little bit of a dirty trick, but so when I go to watch TV, you see the games that are on, right? And they continued yesterday just to play opposite new games, old games of the teams that were coming up later in the day.
Starting point is 00:07:38 So I would go and I would be confused because I was like, wait a minute, the commanders aren't supposed to be playing the Bucks right now, but I don't want to watch that game. What, what am I missing? Did I look at the schedule wrong? Like what happened here? And I kept going back to the NFL network at the wrong times because they were
Starting point is 00:07:53 playing games between when the teams previously played at the times that the current games are going on. And I wonder how many people didn't see like in a little corner that it said, like 2023 or 2024 and watch the wrong games thinking they were watching the right playoff game because they were like at a bar and just someone auto like, oh, put on the game. They put on the wrong game because NFL networks
Starting point is 00:08:15 spend the entire day playing games opposite the present games. They were just old and wrong games between the same teams. Now that week one matchup, I believe, was in the afternoon, which, if you're still confused at that point, you got bigger problems. I wish I was watching the 2009 Steelers Ravens playoff game. Much more entertaining.
Starting point is 00:08:33 There's Troy Palabalo when you need him. The games were bad, but the palate cleanser is the way the last one ends. It's not even that that game was that great, but the ending of it. Tonight, yeah, I think the way that they scheduled these out, the two prime time games were always gonna be the most competitive.
Starting point is 00:08:50 Last night lived up, I thought that was a real good game. Looking at the box score, I'm a little confused as to how more points weren't scored. Because it's not like, I know that there were timely stops, especially on fourth downs, but it was a little confusing. And tonight is a really interesting game for a lot of different reasons. That one happens to me all the time though.
Starting point is 00:09:07 Look at Russell Wilson's box score and tell me how it is. They only scored 14 points and why he's being run out of the league. It's because every guy in the league can go 20 for 29 for 250 yards and score 14 points. Well, they also only had the ball for 20 minutes the entire game where the Ravens had it for 39. Like they just didn't have the ball.
Starting point is 00:09:24 That'll do it. Yeah. Also, I think fans, we need to reset our expectations of football games. If they all were one or two point games where you're watching someone kick a game winning field goal or lead a late drive, then those games wouldn't be as special
Starting point is 00:09:39 and as meaningful to us. We need to embrace close games when they happen, and when blowouts happen, just understand that that's part of the sport Not every game is gonna be a one possession game You say this but because of what the sport gives us in the witching hour every week Even if it's Jacksonville in Carolina, I've come to expect that all the games are going to be closed I'm surprised by the blowouts because every time I'm watching football on Sunday
Starting point is 00:10:04 They give me eight games and I think they sort of distorted they fool me exactly four or five of the i have to ask for a ride of the marmite's only same across the board you remember it like while that was a crazy game i went into six over times and you just forget the fact that there were forty five other games at the same time that ended with at twenty one point difference i think though one of the things that's absolutely happening to the consumer as this thing continues to get larger and larger is it wasn't enough football for me this weekend. Watching one game at a time is not enough for me.
Starting point is 00:10:38 If that game's a blowout like the four o'clock window, this is how spoiled we've gotten. When that four o'clock window has three games and two of them aren't close i'm bored because i need the stimulation i need i need give me nine games give me stakes and now the spot but these are playoff i'm not i'm i'm i understand what you're telling me that this isn't happening to the rest of you one game on at a time doesn't feel like enough tell me it's not happen to Tell me I'm wrong about this. I disagree, because Championship Weekend
Starting point is 00:11:07 is my favorite weekend in the NFL. When it's AFC Championship, NFC Championship, it's the best two and the best two playing against each other, watching one at a time. That is the best Sunday of the NFL year. It's better than Super Bowl Sunday. It's better than wild card weekend. It's just simply the best.
Starting point is 00:11:22 So this weekend was, I mean, it was good. This coming weekend is pretty good. This coming weekend is the best. So this weekend was, I mean, it was good. Like this coming, this coming weekend is pretty good. I was going to say this past weekend, it was like Thursday night, we got the orange bowl. Friday night, we got the cotton bowl. Saturday all day, Sunday all day. And now we get one more game tonight. Like I know some of the games like, yeah,
Starting point is 00:11:38 you're not locked into every possession. You, you knew like the Ravens game was over by halftime, but I don't know. Like it's not every single football game is gonna end in a one possession score. All the games were bad except the last one. They were. Yeah but I like where Jess is coming from. This sport out of like the non-combat sports lends itself to if you have an advantage tactically or just talent wise given the physical nature of the sport the goal on that on that final spread is going to be larger than basketball or hockey or even baseball. So I think we should actually spin this and
Starting point is 00:12:09 cherish the close games that we do get when you get to this level. We don't think this sport enough. I agree with Chris Cody and Dan you're gonna complain ourselves into a 32 team NCAA tournament style NFL playoff and then it's gonna be like a 40-week season and the Quality is gonna get worse and we're all gonna be like this Well now we have too much football just like we did with the first round the college football playoffs I the system I actually preferred the old NFL playoff system before they changed it most recently But I may be in the minority there, but like I think it's fine. We don't need we don't need more
Starting point is 00:12:42 We can one more game. We get a Monday nighter I enjoy watching one game at a time. Okay. I'm anti red zone isolated. Yeah, I mean my wife's watching red zone It's like a flurry of in its overload of information Going from one game to the next and then back to here and back to their red zones playing Showing plays are even in the red zone. It's a it's a misnamed network You got to get a feel for the game the subtle little nuances that happen during the game, the momentum changes, all of that stuff. You don't get that on the Red Zone. I wanna slip into the rhythm of a game.
Starting point is 00:13:12 I wanna see every play, even the bad plays. I wanna see a guy take a knee. I wanna see a timeout. I wanna see a motion penalty. I want all the minutiae of a game, not just the highlights. Well then, what didn't you like when Red Zone would show you non red zone plays
Starting point is 00:13:26 You know what it was it was a breath of fresh air. I will admit that I think red zone should show you the worst plays as Well confusing red zone should you like all the commercial breaks outside the red zone right? Yeah, I have a good idea for you Greg We should start our own network called all the other plays you know all the minutiae I want to join the 40s. I want a network that shows me the shank one We're gonna start our own network called All The Other Plays. You know what? All the minutiae. I want a network that shows me the shank wanties. Uh huh. The shank punt. Shunts. Yes. Careful. All punts. That would be a good...
Starting point is 00:13:54 The all punt network. Why not? I like the APM. Wonstead would be addicted to it. He would be. Yeah, sure thing. Hey, you sold that car yet? Yeah, sold it to Carvana. Oh, I thought you were selling to that guy.
Starting point is 00:14:10 The guy who wanted to pay me in foreign currency, no interest, over 36 months? Yeah, no. Carvana gave me an offer in minutes, picked it up and paid me on the spot. It was so convenient. Just like that? Yeah. No hassle? None. That is super convenient. Okay guys, it says here I'm supposed to tell you about the refreshing tropical lime flavor of Mountain Dew Baja Blast, but what does refreshing tropical lime mean exactly? Allow me to describe it in a way that my fellow DraftKings players will understand. Mountain Dew Baja Blast tastes like a buzzer beating three pointer to cover
Starting point is 00:14:49 the spread, nailing a multi-leg parlay, setting the perfect daily fantasy lineup. It's like hitting an underdog money line. And I want you to know that feeling too. So make your picks and then grab some tropical lime flavored Mountain Dew Baja Blast for you and your buds. Available wherever refreshing beverages are sold. Don LeBataard. Quiet man. Yes. You know, I'm a married man. I don't cheat on my wife despite that gratuitous line in back in my day.
Starting point is 00:15:17 That you wrote. Stugats. I wish you were here, my wife. I really miss her. No, I don't. That's the thing about being married. You know, you're not allowed to say, I don don't miss my wife I've been gone two days I haven't been gone long enough to miss my wife I'm sorry I call her I'm on the phone with her for 30 seconds you know what am I
Starting point is 00:15:35 hello alright alright we'll see ya alright and then you know I'm gonna see her in two days I was jumping Charlie good. This is the Don LeVatar show with the Stugats. Can I ask Chris Cody a question here? I thought of you yesterday Greg because, or Chris, I'm sorry, I thought of you because something happened to me. I am peeling a banana in the kitchen and I'm about to throw away the peel and as I do so, I drop the rest of the banana on the floor. What do you do? This is your home kitchen?
Starting point is 00:16:13 Yes. Okay. This is a three stew just get. I'm picking it up and I'm giving it the old once over and I'm looking at it and if it passes the eye test, I'm eating it. Are you a shoe household? That's just very important. I don't wear shoes in the'm eating it. Are you a shoe household? That's just very important.
Starting point is 00:16:25 I don't wear shoes in the house, no. Do you wash your feet? Yes. Okay. Dear cats. Well this is the thing, I threw away the banana because I have pets. Oh yeah.
Starting point is 00:16:36 But my floors are clean twice a week, so like this is not. Twice a week. This is not, it's not a dirty floor, but I felt guilt about throwing away the banana because it's a perfectly good banana and it's fallen on the floor. But my instinct was to try and catch it and my first thought was I'm just going to eat this and then I had to have the second thought of this is by a garbage can and it's near where the pets eat.
Starting point is 00:17:03 But do the cats wear shoes? You didn't answer the question. The cats do not wear shoes. So you go Monday, Thursday, or Monday, Friday cleaning day? What's the deal? Right, you're breaking out the mop two times a week. Friday and Monday.
Starting point is 00:17:11 That's so cute when I have shoes on. It's like, well, I don't wear walk. I know, like a sweater on a cat. Come on, get out of here. Unless I'm in a really disgusting place, I shouldn't surprise people. My taller, I don't get afraid of a little like you know I'm gonna say dirt But I I will eat things if it if it passes the eye test take a dirt before you die
Starting point is 00:17:32 I follow the the five-second No, you were gonna get immediate buy-in Nana doogie I think come on God rest her soul yeah, but the banana is sticky Okay, the banana is gonna pick up lint and dirt in a way that hard shell apples and pears will not. Exactly. So what you do here is you pick up the banana, you give it a rinse under the faucet, then you roll it very carefully, gingerly, in paper towels.
Starting point is 00:18:01 You can't rinse a banana. Yeah you can, but then you gotta dry it. You gotta dry it. It's his banana. It feels like it's got a sponge material. You don't rinse a banana. Yeah, you can. But then you gotta dry it. You gotta dry it. It's his banana. It feels like it's got a sponge material. You don't wanna eat a wet banana. No. Okay, nobody wants to eat a wet banana.
Starting point is 00:18:11 What if it's like one little peck of dirt on it? Do you get a little? You can, you can. Yeah, I've done that. Peck of dirt before you die is a real thing. You know, and a peck's a big vessel as well. So, people worry too much about germs and everything. I'm not the guy wiping off my thing at the cart.
Starting point is 00:18:30 You clean your fruit? Not always, no. So you're blowing on a wet banana, Greg? I wouldn't blow on a wet banana. I would wrap it in a paper towel to dry it. Put it on the poll, please, Juju at LeBittard Show. Would you eat a wet banana? And also put on the pole at LeBittard Show,
Starting point is 00:18:50 you've dropped a banana outside of the peel on the floor. Do you eat it or do you throw it away? It's a wordy pole. It really is. You have to put on the cats don't wear shoes also. Also do you gotta eat a pickck of dirt before you die? Well this is the thing that I wanted to get to because the fact that Greg Cody and Billy just did the musical dance of Billy goes, I just imagine someone listening for the first
Starting point is 00:19:18 time and Billy says, peck of dirt before you die and Greg Cody's like, exactly! I mean. What about a peck of dirt before you die. And Greg Cody's like, exactly! I mean. It's. What about a peck of norovirus? No one's ever responded that way to a peck of dirt. Well, because he was gonna say it, and Billy said it first, because they have such rhythm between them. Usually on Tuesdays, but today we're getting lucky
Starting point is 00:19:39 on a Monday. It's a beautiful thing. Billy is quicker thinking of, Greg was going to say it, he had it loaded up, I saw him, he had it loaded up. Oh yeah, cocked and loaded. Cockin' it. Thank you. Now, will you explain, you want to explain to the audience again for those who do not
Starting point is 00:19:55 know what a pack of dirt and Nellie Doogie, what the whole thing is, so that those who might not have understood the back and forth that you guys had for just yourselves, right? That was my grandmother on my mother's side Nellie Doogie God rest her soul. She's been gone a long time. She died in like the late 60s I think I barely remember her big heavy woman and one of her sayings was you're gonna eat a Peck of dirt before you die I thought a peck was more honestly you die. Was she a chain smoker, Greg? I thought a peck was more, honestly. It seems like it's only two gallons.
Starting point is 00:20:29 Well, still. That's a lot of dirt. That's a lot of dirt. Yeah, but no, she died, she went to her grave referring to it as sugar diabetes. Everybody now just calls it diabetes. But she was a woman who never went to a doctor. It was a sad story, because she fairly young She was in her early mid 60s like 63 ish, but peck of dirt before you die didn't serve her particularly well But as a general life rule, I think it's something Second so I just want to be clear The person who advised you have to eat a peck of dirt before you died died early because she ate a peck of dirt Well, no, she no sugar a lot lot of sugar. I never went to the doctor. Yeah and here's the other thing.
Starting point is 00:21:08 She would have more served eating dirt honestly. I don't, it sounds like I'm bragging when I say this but in effect her coining the phrase eat a pack of dirt before you die was the forerunner of what we all know now as the three second rule. So in effect just like my mother invented the handheld fan, my grandmother invented the three second rule. What's your mother's name by the way? It's escaping. Ruth. Ruth.
Starting point is 00:21:33 Ruth Doogie. Put it on the poll please. No middle name either. Juju, are we still making Ruth? What don't you like? No middle names? I like commitment, let's get a middle name. My wife doesn't have a middle name, why can't we decide? Well, do you guys know that Zane Gonzalez, Zane can't be his name, right?
Starting point is 00:21:52 Like, it's not his name, there aren't- It's in Zane. There are not Zanes and Gonzalez's, that can't be his. The old West was full of Zanes. Wait, if Zane is his name, Dan, Billy Zane, for your game, first name, last name. His name's Holden. Yep. I'd go with Zane. his name Dan Billy Zane for your game. I've a child name last name his name is Holden Yep, I'd go with Zane Holden Gonzalez. He's not the holder no
Starting point is 00:22:11 Louis's name short Lewis is telling me in my ear that his middle name is for to Nado Confirmed he was yesterday. I was afraid to say it Is that what happened you looked it up? Didn't know how to say it That what happened you looked it up Didn't know how to say I was intimidated. Yes, I said it like count Orla Scary the way said it Yeah, you will obey Zane's a lot easier. It is I don't know how holden for to not became Zane.
Starting point is 00:22:47 How did that happen? I know how. He goes by the name Zane as a result of his father, Joseph, discovering the name in the movie Maverick, where James Garner's character was named Zane. It's a great flick. Great movie. It's an old west name. The chemistry from Jodie Foster and Mel Gibson,
Starting point is 00:23:02 it bubbles off the screen. James Garner is a classic. Well, wasn't he, was he in the original Maverick, the source material, and that was kind of like a callback among generations? I think it was, yes. Wow, what a flick. I got a call on late Saturday night
Starting point is 00:23:18 that I was not expecting after receiving a text that I was not expecting, that I believe to be the only text of this kind that has ever been sent, ever, in the history of people texting. My mother, late Saturday night, about 11 p.m., writes me, are you watching Columbo? Yeah. Ah, Columbo.
Starting point is 00:23:44 There's evidently a marathon from eight to midnight that her and my father watch every Saturday of Columbo. So good. Do you know what episode it was? I do not. Do you watch these marathons? I was told it was chili con carne, there were some updates, but it was four hours.
Starting point is 00:24:01 It wasn't an episode, it was many episodes. There cannot have been another person in 2025 writing or receiving the text, are you watching 70s detective show, Columbo? I literally texted my boyfriend like two days ago, it's Columbo time. Wow. Wow.
Starting point is 00:24:20 Is that what you guys call it? Yeah. What is Columbo time? Do you do this Saturday night marathon as well? Unfortunately I was watching the Steelers game, but no, it's on streaming now. I can just turn on Columbo whenever I want, pop on any old port in a storm.
Starting point is 00:24:39 What a great episode. Put on my little jammies. Oh, my boyfriend's mom got me these really comfy, cozy socks for Christmas. Oh, put put those on get under the covers pop up on my iPad do some online shopping while I watch Columbo that's Columbo. Fast channels are the best I love fast channels and I know they're growing in popularity we're available on quite a few of them but now you have fast channels that are just it's Walker Texas Ranger 24-7 get your fill and you can
Starting point is 00:25:04 just put it on in the background and be entranced by these things what's a fast channel fast channels essentially so they live on streaming platforms we're available on the NBC fast channel we're available obviously on DKN which is a fast channel you go to a smart TV or or a streaming platform piece of hardware and you they many of these own like Roku has their own fast channels. They present their own lists of, it's basically we're going back to cable television within the streamers.
Starting point is 00:25:32 But it's devoted to usually, cause they can have like hundreds and hundreds of fast channels that they provide. It's usually devoted to a certain genre. So you have like a thriller channel or you have a straight up Baywatch channel. It's just Baywatch all day, every day. You have Walker, Texas Ranger all day, every day. You get Jag all day, every day.
Starting point is 00:25:53 Colombo. The Greg Cody Show needs a fast channel. I was thinking, Greg, you and I are so aligned today. I was thinking just that. Don't you guys have video from all your episodes? You should sell your library to a streaming service and just have 24 hours of Greg. We should. Christopher, get on that make a call do
Starting point is 00:26:07 something about it. Dan you reminded me I speaking of Colombo Steven Spielberg directed the first ever episode of Colombo I happen to be walking down the street last week and two weeks ago in New York I saw Steven Spielberg walking his dog how funny is that and then I was in Whole Foods later and I saw Michael Imperiali. Oh, what a Saturday in New York Wow, the stars were out Great. Did you go up to them and say hello? What a cute dog course not. I'm playing it so cool I see Steven Spielberg. I'm walking past him and then I'm going The dog does give you an in though. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Yeah, that's the ultimate conversation starter
Starting point is 00:26:43 Right, you know if you're trying to pick up a woman or a man and they're walking a dog. Steven Spielberg. With a beautiful dog and then you're in. Yeah. Yeah, that's it. Is Jess trying to pick up Steven Spielberg? People love your dog to be complimented.
Starting point is 00:26:56 You know what I'm saying? You think Steven Spielberg. You compliment my dog? They're my best friends. Went home and told whoever, I saw Jess today. I wanna walk in the dog. That's right.
Starting point is 00:27:04 Yeah, probably. Yeah. Greg Cody today hasn't been the same, Stugats. I don't know if you saw him. He came in a bit disheveled. He came in a bit discombobulated, disoriented because- Better than a new shirt. In our parking garage here, two valet guys crashed into each other.
Starting point is 00:27:23 Oh my God, yeah. You're acting as each other. Oh my god. Yeah. You're acting as if you're surprised by it. You're the one who told me. I'm oh my god-ing at the memory because it was not just a little fender bender. It was bam! It was one of these metal on metal. And I would guess that both of them were going like 20 miles an hour, which is pretty quick. That can't be right.
Starting point is 00:27:41 You're unsure. No, no, Dan, in this parking lot, is it bad that I'm not surprised by this news? In fact, I'm surprised it doesn't happen more often. Was it on the ramp? It was on a corner, yeah. It was taking a corner. You know how I know Carson Beck will be fine in Miami? Because he has a Lamborghini, he probably doesn't know how to drive it either. He'll fit right in.
Starting point is 00:27:59 A Lamborghini. But you were surprised to hear that, Dan? Like two valets getting in an accident in this garage. The corners are tight. They usually honk when they're coming around the corners, and I appreciate that because they're letting me know that they're coming, but I'm not surprised by it. There are mirrors there to help you and they are the valets. It is their primary responsibility to not crash those cars. It's their job. Valets love to take a good joy ride, man.
Starting point is 00:28:23 A valet's primary job is to see what this thing can do. How do you play this? Do you wait till the person comes back for their car to tell them, or do you try to reach out to them, or you just put it on? I think you just are like, I don't know how that happened. It's so weird. Hope they don't notice.
Starting point is 00:28:35 No, you come out and you're like, that was there. Yeah. That was there. I mean, there's cameras everywhere, right? No, cameras, can I tell you something about cameras? They never work when you need them. There's never a camera who you would benefit from functioning that is actually functioning,
Starting point is 00:28:50 or they'll just tell you that camera doesn't work. Anytime I've been in peril, and I've needed camera to support that I was a victim of said peril, the camera was disconnected, it wasn't working, it was pointing in the wrong direction, that camera doesn't record, it's only a live feed. The cameras never work when you need them. Same with in Colombo.
Starting point is 00:29:12 Mm-hmm. From fireside conversations to football Sundays, winter means more moments with the coolest people in your life. Make these moments even better with Miller Lite. I know I do. The great tasting light beer for people who love beer. A new year is a perfect time for friends, family, and great tasting light beer. Tastes like Miller time. Recently I had family over and while everyone's palate is different,
Starting point is 00:29:36 I knew they all like beer and they all look like people who want to drink beer that actually tastes like beer. So I brought out a nice little silver platter of Miller Lite. That beautiful white can was an instant winner. Trust me, learn from my experience, set that bad boy out and you will be making people happy left and right because Miller Lite is brewed for taste. It hits different than other light beers, the original light beer since 1975. And, still, the very best one. Miller Lite. Great taste. 96 calories. Go to MillerLite.com slash Dan to find delivery options near you, or you can pick up some Miller Lite pretty much anywhere they sell beer. Tastes like Miller time. Celebrate responsibly, Miller Brewing Company Milwaukee, Wisconsin 96 calories and 3.2 carbs per 12 ounces. Don LeBotard.
Starting point is 00:30:25 I heard that as a woman faking pain. I didn't think that sounded real. I really didn't, you know. It was not fake. It was in no way fake. Yeah. You can spot a woman faking it. Stugats.
Starting point is 00:30:36 Yes, I can, Jess. Expert. I've been married 40 years. This is the Don LeBotard Show with the StuGards. Put it on the poll please, Juju, at LeBotard Show. Is the Valet's primary responsibility just to see what this thing can do at LeBotard Show? Yesterday, during the game, during the Philadelphia game, and I was a little surprised to see the Packers not be able to do anything but I suppose given how injured they are they're the youngest
Starting point is 00:31:11 team in the league and they didn't beat anybody good this year and so they get to the playoffs and they get to Philadelphia and Philadelphia rolls them during the game after Juju gave you the three leg parlay of McConkie over four and a half catches Pickens over three and a half catches and oh AJ Brown over oh ouch yeah he didn't get it on AJ Brown but AJ Brown during the game I imagine Philadelphia is tired of A.J. Brown. It's been a little bit confusing to see A.J. Brown not be super dominant. I don't care what Philadelphia is tired of. I'm tired of their fan base.
Starting point is 00:31:53 How does that sound? They wanted to fire Nick Sirianni like a month or two ago, and now they're all celebrating Nick Sirianni. He is the greatest coach in Eagles history. I said it. Better than Andy Reid, better than Dick Vermeel. This is the fourth consecutive season. He has led this team to the playoffs.
Starting point is 00:32:09 He's the only Eagles coach in Eagles history to do that for first four seasons, going to the playoffs. He was a play away from beating Andy Reid and Patrick Mahomes in a Super Bowl. I don't care about what Philadelphia fans think about anything. And I'm talking to you, Spike Eskin anything and I'm talking to you Spike Eskin and I'm talking to you Angelo Cataldi. I don't care what you have to say. You wanted to fire Nick Sirianni 35 days ago and I'm not going to allow you to celebrate Nick Sirianni moving forward.
Starting point is 00:32:39 How about that? Wow it's been announced. Wow. You saw it. I don't even know if Kataldi's still on the air. I have no idea. I don't think Spike Eskin is there. Spike Eskin is there. He went from WFAN, I was going to take his job as the program director, and now he's doing afternoon drive. How about that? Howard Eskin to Spike Eskin.
Starting point is 00:32:57 No nepotism there. I mean, nothing to see. Burt Bell was pretty good, Stu Gatts. Pretty good Eagles coach. He loved the Eagles so much, he had a heart attack because he couldn't stay away. His doctor was like, stop going to Eagles games, you're gonna die.
Starting point is 00:33:10 And then he couldn't stop and he died. But there is something pretty ridiculous about seeing Eagle fans now celebrate Nick Sirianni when two months ago, they wanted him fired. They did, they were yelling at him at home games. I know, but Stugats, the sports fan is- Of that sports fan emotional and uh... not rational not shackled to consistency or or the
Starting point is 00:33:32 rigidities of having to stay on the same path all the time you know what i would give for nick sir i need to be my coach you know what i would give for the last four seasons of the eagles anything anything but the finger does still got to have it right when he says that uh... syriana is better than andy reid because i don't think that's accurate justin herbert has more passing yards than any quarterback ever through five
Starting point is 00:34:00 seasons has a one a playoff game has the same number of playoff wins as to uh... does uh... and i seasons. Hasn't won a playoff game. Has the same number of playoff wins as Tua does. And I look at Justin Herbert and I say that winning is not a quarterback stat. I look at Justin Herbert and I think that him having more passing yards than any quarterback ever through five seasons means that he's a good quarterback but i would not proclaim him based on that statistic harbaugh is saying of him that justin herbert is already an all-timer in terms of skill set
Starting point is 00:34:40 when you say siriani the criticism seems fair to me of Sirianni, he's got a loaded team. He's got a team that all of us. He's 48 and 20 with that team. Yeah, and should be. Because. But he is. Yeah, and he has gotten to a place where he has put the standard at everyone knows
Starting point is 00:35:04 how good that team is. It is one of the six good teams, right? Like we're all, we all know who the six good teams are. Correct? We'd all have the same list for that. And whoever's seven would be after like a good distance from what it is that we know. It's pretty rare for us to know this like this.
Starting point is 00:35:22 It's pretty rare to have a bunch of teams that only have two or three or four losses. It's not a normal thing to see the Packers in that division not be able to beat anyone good. And when they go into Philadelphia, you're like, yeah, that's how that's gonna go. They surprised me on the road at Dallas, but I know Philadelphia is good.
Starting point is 00:35:41 I wasn't sure about Dallas. Even with Dak Prescott and then having thirteen wins that season we all could have seen them losing at losing at home or whatever was that what i would have twelve wins of thirteen wins that season everyone listening to this knows philadelphia's good and knows philadelphia's been good for four years and furthermore don't give serianni the credit for that. Right. Like don't look at that team and say that's because of
Starting point is 00:36:07 Sirianni. When you say six good teams and we all know it, you're talking Chiefs, Ravens, Bills, Eagles, Lions, Bengals. I'm not certain if the Vikings are. Who is the six? I was like saying that back here. I was I assume there's five definitive, right? Yeah, yeah, the Texans would be that like who is that? It would be the Vikings. So you guys are not buying on the Vikings like you're not not with those other no We'll see I'll let you know after tonight. Okay, fine. You don't that's fine. I I've done the same thing all season I'm like Sam Darnold's gonna lose at the end. Fine, but they have been good all season
Starting point is 00:36:45 Like there's not there's not any disputing of that the couple of times they played the they played the Teams that we think are good. They've played with them except they the Detroit game at the end I guess probably changes your mind on the Vikings, right? I mean, they're 14 and 3 No, I think they're good. I just don't know if they're in that group of five Very good, but I mean it's a little bit different now that the game's been relocated to Arizona But losing a road game to Sean McVeigh and the Rams like is there a great deal of shame in that This is what everybody was kind of afraid of if Sean McVeigh got into the postseason Which is why I would have voted for him to get in if they didn't make it if I was given the chance
Starting point is 00:37:21 I would have kicked out the Vikings and just been like, ah, Arnold. Not the Bengals. Wow. You're kicking out a 15 and 2 team or were the Vikings 14 and 3? Really really good team. Yeah, their record in one run games was fantastic. Run games? One score game. One, one, uh, what did I say? One run games. Yeah, their record overall was 14 and 3 so it stands to reason. Right, well that's true, but no the point is they didn't win that many routes I don't think they played a lot of close games but won them that means something what was Minnesota's point differential can you give me the can you give me the teams obviously it's going to be those five that have the best point differential but is Minnesota in there with those five in terms of having won games by big margins? What are the point
Starting point is 00:38:06 differentials? The Bills have the biggest one, correct? Or is it the Lions? The Vikings were plus 100. The Packers, just to put that into perspective, the Packers were plus 122. I'm seeing Bills and Ravens both plus 157. And the Lions plus 222. So that's ridiculous. You read the reports that because it's unfortunate that Minnesota has to go against the Sean McVay team on the road. The NFL is finally looking at this asinine rule that if you went into division, you host a playoff. Whoa, asinine. He hated about the NFL.
Starting point is 00:38:38 What? Hated about the NFL. I'm with Mike. All winning a division should guarantee you as a playoff spot. Home field advantage is so immense in that sport that I really hate it for a team like Minnesota. It's been really I'm with Mike all it should guarantee all winning a division should guarantee you as a playoff spot home field advantage is so Immense in that sport that I really hate it for a team like, Minnesota It's been really good, but they just so happen to occupy the same division as the Lions that they have to go through this Impossible path I disagree
Starting point is 00:38:54 I think the division that this is why the division rivalries are so good because winning your division gives you a reward that you Wouldn't otherwise get I know it's a reward still It's just like no more home game is for you. But if you're Tampa Bay playing in a weak division, you have a leg up before the season even starts, as opposed to Minnesota playing in arguably the toughest division in football. I think there's such an obsession with trying to even
Starting point is 00:39:18 the playing field. Just like the system's fine. It's fine. It's good. But Greg, in fairness. You don't have to keep trying to adjust things constantly. Right, in fairness, no one headed into the season, everyone thought Lions Packers in that division.
Starting point is 00:39:30 It was not the Vikings. The Vikings were supposed to be a bad group. People thought the Bears were gonna make the playoffs before the season. No, the Bears are making the Super Bowl. I said that in Kansas City. I'm very staunchly in the camp that you should only get a playoff spot, not host,
Starting point is 00:39:42 but just be warned, this means for worse playoff games. Because the better teams are going to get home field advantage and that usually, you know, evens things out a little bit. I am pro more blowouts, I guess. Pete Billy, can you please update me on a couple of things, both your listener league and how the voting is going for the Sports Podcast Awards that everyone in our audience should help God Bless Football win because God Bless Football should win with or without your help, but you should help Billy and Stugat win with God Bless Football, which is already award-winning. Well, not just us. You can also help Pablo, you can also help David. There's a number of shows that are up for Sports Podcast Award, and guys, today's the deadline. So,
Starting point is 00:40:24 if you're listening to this tomorrow, it's too late. But I appreciate the effort. But if you're listening to this today, vote. And vote right now, don't put it off because these awards are held across the pond. They're over there in England, right? And here's the thing, I don't know what time zones we all know are tricky, a situation there.
Starting point is 00:40:42 I don't know what time the polls close. They close today, but is it England time or is it situation there. I don't know what time the polls close. They close today, but is it England time or is it America time? I don't know. Just vote now. Just try to get, be sure to get your vote in. So vote for us, go to sportspodcastscoop.com. Now you ask about the listener league, Dan.
Starting point is 00:40:56 How'd you do this week? I didn't participate. What do you mean? Why not? It's so much fun. I really think you would like fantasy, especially this fantasy. It's not like a commitment. Every week is a new roster, so you don't have to worry about it
Starting point is 00:41:08 You can dress up if you want. Yeah, that's true. You can it has nothing to do with it at all But if you want you you can dress up more fun. Yeah, let's make a pact all of us together We're all gonna participate next week the act Packed Dan pinky promise pinky promise my pinky Dan, put your pinky around Sue's eyes. When's the last time you pinky promised, Dan? Like a legitimate one. Are you shocked that it's the same size as all the other fingers?
Starting point is 00:41:31 Really, before your pinky touches my pinky, make sure you wanna do this. You're committed to it? I've never before pinky promised. Now you have to kiss the hand. In your marriage? You have to do this. I do, my wife always does.
Starting point is 00:41:41 Exactly. You kiss your thumb. Yeah. Stu, you have to kiss now. Exactly. You kiss your thumb. Yeah. Stu, you have to kiss. Now, and now you kiss Lips. This would be the same time, yeah, Dan, lead in. Yeah, give the image. Now you guys are at the same time.
Starting point is 00:41:50 Get your timing, go. Give the image at that image. Now you're married. Yeah, there you go. There you go. It's adorable. You're gonna regret that immediately. I already do.
Starting point is 00:41:59 From fireside conversations to football Sundays, winter means more moments with the coolest people in your life. Make these moments even better with Miller Lite. I know I do. The grape tasting light beer for people who love beer. A new year is a perfect time for friends, family, and grape tasting light beer. Tastes like Miller time.
Starting point is 00:42:18 Recently I had family over and while everyone's palate is different, I knew they all like beer and they all look like people who want to drink beer that actually tastes like beer. So I brought out a nice little silver platter of Miller Lite. That beautiful white can was an instant winner. Trust me, learn from my experience, set that bad boy out, and you will be making people happy left and right. Because Miller Lite is brewed for taste. It hits different than other light beers, the original light beer since 1975. And still the very best one. Miller Lite,
Starting point is 00:42:50 great taste, 96 calories. Go to MillerLite.com slash Dan to find delivery options near you or you can pick up some Miller Lite pretty much anywhere they sell beer. Tastes like Miller time. Celebrate responsibly, Miller Brewing Company, Milwaukee, Wisconsin, 96 calories and 3.2 carbs per 12 ounces.

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