The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz - Hour 1: Stugotz's Prison Attention

Episode Date: May 21, 2024

We've sent the ever-shameless Stugotz to jail with Scottie Scheffler to explain how he would have gotten Scottie out of jail, made the story about himself, capitalized on the moment for book sales, an...d spent extra time in jail just to hammer home the point. Plus, Pablo Torre joins us to explain what HE would have done if he were in Jeff Darlington's spot and to discuss his new PTFO episode about X-Men 97, the Scarlett Johansson OpenAI controversy, and movies that were ahead of their time. Then, Ron Magill is here to chat with the crew about ticklish animals, falcons and cocaine, cicadas, and hyena surgery. Also, as a result, we get the incredible moment of Chris Cote tickling his father. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Starting point is 00:00:00 You're listening to Giraffe King's Network. That's the sound of unaged whiskey transforming into Jack Daniel's Tennessee Whiskey in Lynchburg, Tennessee. Around 1860, nearest green taught Jack Daniel how to filter whiskey through charcoal for a smoother taste, one drop at a time. This is one of many sounds in Tennessee with a story to tell. To hear them in person, plan your trip at tnvacation.com.
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Starting point is 00:01:13 ["The Newspaper News Theme"] Not unlike Donald Trump has figured out that if you just inundate the news stream with all manner of shame, we can't keep up with it all and your shamelessness will be able to win. Stu Gotts has figured out how it is to bombard our show and all its producers with so much information in real time that we can't keep up with the game of Whack-A-Mole. So he said recently that Michael Jordan would never lose two home games in a row in the playoffs and then we looked it up
Starting point is 00:01:49 and found out that he had. And he also said that Michael Jordan would never go 6 for 24 in a playoff game but against the Pacers he did go 9 for 25 in a playoff game. But it doesn't matter because in Stugatz's memory Michael Jordan shot 100% from the field in his career And so we've sent him off to jail where he is presently sitting with the giant head of Scotty Scheffler five or six times the size of Terrifying on his gots his head Stu gots what are you doing in there with the jail in the jail cell with Scotty Scheffler?
Starting point is 00:02:23 Well, Dan, you, Scotty turned to me, he asked, hey, can you help me out? And I said, I can help you out. If you go, I go. So I am now currently in a prison cell with Scotty Sheffler. He should have been arrested for the size of his head. He wasn't. But I am going to get Scotty Sheffler out of here in no time for the right amount of money.
Starting point is 00:02:41 He's just closer to the camera, guys. It's a perspective thing. It's not a prison. It's a to got so those two things are different are they put it on the pole please at Levitard show do you know the difference between a prison and a jail do you know the difference of six of 24 and nine of 27 just I'm wondering just out of curiosity Was 9 of 25. Oh even better for Michael. How about that? By the way, Dan Scotty can't talk. He's very upset about this. He has to get to the second round to the PGA There was no reason he should have been arrested. So you won't be hearing from Scotty Scheffler, okay?
Starting point is 00:03:16 Okay, so you are acting as his attorney in jail his accomplice friend and his friend who would do anything for Scotty Scheffler You know I'm talking about Scotty All right Go ahead and give us the backstory there because i do think it's interesting greg how look at me would you have been if you had been the only reporter with video access to that news story how available how quickly would you hired a publicist a publicity team and i will be able would you have immediately become to the american media i mean i would have uh... i'd have t-shirts in my merch store of me at five a m wearing a minor tell me
Starting point is 00:03:48 what the light on it i would uh... i would be doing every single show imaginable i would have uh... done a live greg cody show podcast episode live four thirty in the morning uh... would would have done it all man you gotta take advantage with shepley never blinks uh... you have to take advantage of a situation like that. Darlington, I feel like, left the ball on the ground. Although, if this thing does go to trial and Sheffler
Starting point is 00:04:14 is prosecuted, key witness, eyewitness, Jeff Darlington. Jessica, do you think that Darlington buys himself anything in hiding from the look at me of this. We asked him to come on and the only reason we wanted him on was just to talk about how surreal it was to be him that day and get caught up in that storm and he wants the work to speak for itself. I feel like he's doing the thing from the newsroom where he's like, I reported the news, you know, and I kind of like that for him. He sort of is the news though. I reported the news you know and I kind of like that for him lame he sort of is the
Starting point is 00:04:45 news though in a reported the news Pablo can be very look at me Pablo has a young theater kid as a kindergartener that has been pushed down his entire life Pablo how would you a Pablo Torre finds out is the name of the podcast and it is getting very popular how would you have handled the entire Scheffler situation if you were the only reporter who had video of that? Would you have been a news hound or would you have been look at me I want to do the publicity tour for being the news? Well I think Jeff Darlington did what a journalist should do when you're presented with a situation where you're right behind in the car behind
Starting point is 00:05:28 and you get out and you tape and you have the only camera footage that you have because the body cam was off. Why is this a controversy? Who's objecting to his instinct there? Is it because he's not doing interviews about this? Well, Greg... Answer the question, Pablo. You didn't answer the question. Great reflection. What would you have done, brother? What would you have done, brother? What would you have done? I would have done that, and I would have tried to,
Starting point is 00:05:48 when I was pushed, I mean, look, I'm not trying to do, like, I'm a bigger, tougher journalist than Jeff Darlington, I'm not saying that. I would have done what he would have done, and tried to see how long I could stay out there, to get footage. That seems like an obvious call to me. Oh, so you would have pushed against the police
Starting point is 00:06:06 and risked your own arrest. Well, I'm not saying that a goal of mine would be to get arrested. I'm just saying Jeff Darlington was within his rights to be there and to do that, right? Like, what's the- Pablo, Pablo. What? What? The Look At Me reporter, yes, he was within his rights.
Starting point is 00:06:23 Absolutely, we're marveling at his restraint, at his not wanting to be the story. Greg and Stugatz would have wanted to just be closer to everything that was happening there, and Stugatz has now created the scenario where he ends up in jail with Scheffler as a freedom fighter. A crusader, Dan. Pablo, let's check in now with Stugatz here so he can give you his position. Because you've dropped the ball.
Starting point is 00:06:48 With time to think about it, you failed here, Pablo, to get maximum attention for Pablo. I'm disappointed. I'm seeing what Stugatz is doing here and I am learning from the master. Yeah, I'm glad you're here. Listen, the game is gonna pass you by, Pablo, okay? It's not about the news, it's not about journalism.
Starting point is 00:07:03 It's about you. It's about your brand. And what you do in that spot is you do what I did. You get arrested with Scottie Scheffler. You go to prison with Scottie Scheffler. That's reporting, that's journalism, that's look at me, Louie, that's what journalism has turned into these days.
Starting point is 00:07:19 Darlington squandered an opportunity. I'm sitting here, I have the keys to the cell. Okay. Oh my god. This is great I'm getting Scheffler out and me and chef look at me buddies for life 80 20 my way keys to the cell You like that death? You're still making it prison. It's not prison. He was stretching in jail You don't want to be doing that God says him and Scottie Scheffler doing the Shawshank Redemption thing together. Yes. He has them escaping together. Yes. The great part of this is you're going to be in jail the rest of the day.
Starting point is 00:07:49 Scottie going to be out in and out. That's what you do for a friend, Juju. That's what you do to me. And then the story becomes all about you because you are left alone in prison. At Scheffler, hopefully after he fires a 66 second round, PGA comes to get you out. That's the story. That's how you do it. Right Scotty?
Starting point is 00:08:06 You're only getting the second best lawyer in Louisville if this happens to you. You know that right? Doesn't matter. I don't need an attorney. The longer I sit in jail, prison, whatever damn wants to go, the better for me. The longer I sit there and people are talking about, Oh my God, Stigots, he did something nice for Scottie Scheffler, can you believe? 14 days later, he is still sitting in jail. You guys don't understand. Oh, what a story.
Starting point is 00:08:30 He would go on a hunger strike in jail. They'd be trying to let him out. They'd open the doors and he's like, I'm staying here imprisoned in the attention. Stugats, you can go now. No, I don't wanna go. I'm gonna make this my home for a couple of weeks. Why?
Starting point is 00:08:43 Because that makes me even bigger than I already am. How about that? You can let Scotty go, keep me in here for a month for all I care. Three squared, Dan. Stugatz would reveal to the police from inside of the jail cell that he had marijuana-vaped cartridges on him.
Starting point is 00:08:57 Yes. You could do the reverse grinder, just to stay in there for as long as possible. You should check out my house. I mean. Do you think jail's a hotel you just come and go as you please to? I'm not saying it's comfortable, but Billy,
Starting point is 00:09:07 when I get out in 30 days, oh my God, I'm going to replace David Muir on 2020. How about that? Seriously, am I wrong, Dan? I, yes, just morally and in general, you are wrong, but you are right. Pablo, I put myself in the cell with Scottie Scheffler. That's journalism my friend That's not BFFs for life as well after that. Are you taking journalism classes while you're in prison? No, I
Starting point is 00:09:33 Am reading a book Stu gots is a personal record book. You can check it out here. That's what we do in prison Dan we have we have letters letters from a Louisville jail. Yes. Stugats goes Martin Luther King. We like to read in jail. Yeah, stugatsbook.com. Check it out, my personal record book. Scotty, I'll sign one for you. We will check back in with Stugats in jail in a moment. But he does have this right.
Starting point is 00:09:58 Jeff Darlington blew a glorious chance at doing everything Stephen A. Smith did to capitalize on a Sunday. Thank you. In terms of brand management, Jeff Darling. Stugat's tunnel walking with cameras around him into jail. Yes, a selfie stick. Now how about that, brothers?
Starting point is 00:10:17 I want you to imagine Scheffler on a boat somewhere, just cleaning it up and Stug Gotz walking up like Tim Robbins in Shawshank Redemption because they're lifelong, he and Red are lifelong buddies. Stu Gotz would have absolutely parlayed that into a heavenly buffet of what can I get from the number one golfer in the world. Look at him!
Starting point is 00:10:43 You're so right. The irony of Stu Gotz being the one who ends up in a First Amendment lawsuit with the police department and not you Dan for reporting the news would be I think I don't know that would be great right? That would be hilarious. It is appropriate that the Gotz becomes the Edward Snowden of sports media because he wants to be in jail with Scotty Shelf. I don't know who that is, but I agree with you Pablo. I mean Snowden, genius this guy. Darlington, you're a fool. Thank you. You are holding on to an antiquated set of journalistic ideals.
Starting point is 00:11:19 I don't want to beat the story. What are you, a moron? Oh my god. You're a bigger moron than Scotty You should be arrested for being a moron. I love you, Jeff Stugarts definitely thinks Edward Snowden is like another golfer, right? That just walked out of jail. Yeah, whatever he wants freely. Just missed the cut on Sunday Edward Snowden. It's unfortunate. Do it in a major Since the dawn of mankind we've cooked our food food over an open flame and debated the best way to grill. One thing not up for debate, grilling and beer always go together. And not just any beer will do. Whether you barbecue Texas style to celebrate Wednesday with burgers and dogs,
Starting point is 00:11:58 you need a beer that tastes great and is less filling. So you have more room for food. You need Miller Lite. As you guys may or may not know, I'm a pretty decent cook, especially behind the barbecue. So when I start the fire for my smoker on a hot day, really the only thing that I have to worry about is what wood I'm going to use. The easiest decision for me is what I'll be drinking. That's a nice ice cold can of Mille-Lite. Oh, and by the way, here's a pro tip. It really goes well with brisket. Mille-Lite keeps it simple, undebatable quality, and tastes as great as your barbecue. A perfect companion for grill masters across America. With the Miller Lite in hand, grilling doesn't just taste great.
Starting point is 00:12:33 It tastes like Miller time. To get Miller Lite delivered right at your door, visit MillerLite.com slash Dan, or you can find it pretty much anywhere that sells beer. Celebrate responsibly. Miller Brewing Company, Milwaukee, Wisconsin. 96 calories per 12 ounces. Don Lebatard. Quiet man yes you know I'm a married man I don't cheat on my wife despite that gratuitous line in back in my day. Stugats. I wish you were here my wife I really miss her no I don't that's the thing about being
Starting point is 00:13:02 married you know you're not allowed to say I don't miss That's the thing about being married. You're not allowed to say, I don't miss my wife. I've been gone two days. I haven't been gone long enough to miss my wife. I'm sorry. I call her. I'm on the phone with her for 30 seconds. You know, what am I? Hello? Alright. Alright, we'll see ya. Alright, and then I'm gonna see her in two days. I was jumping Charlie. Good. This is the John LeBathard Show with the Stoogats. our show with the StuGuts. Pablo, what is on Pablo Torre Finds Out? Where are you following your curiosities in this episode? Oh, today is the most journalistic investigation we've ever done, Dan. It is me and Mina
Starting point is 00:13:38 Kimes and David Dennis Jr. watching all of X-Men 97 and talking about it. So I don't know if anybody here had the childhoods that we had, we've been waiting 30 years to talk about a cartoon, we talked about the cartoon, it's the horniest cartoon I've ever seen, and it made me very happy to talk about all of it. Everyone I have heard talk about it, I don't know whether it's tapping into nostalgia,
Starting point is 00:14:00 childhood or what, they say it is exceptionally well done, well written and that it's a piece of art worth not just if you're looking channeling it through the filter of childhood but a modern-day piece of art independent of that it's tremendous I just want to ask Greg Greg personally can you attempt to give us a summary of what you think x-men 97 is about. What do you imagine this show is? I'm not a big superhero cartoon kind of guy.
Starting point is 00:14:30 Good start. I mean, X-Men, I assume, is a group of five superheroes all trying to outdo each other. I have no idea. I like it as five former men. That's right. Okay. What is it? It's a cartoon, right? It's a cartoon. It's a cartoon, Greg, about mutant powers and superheroes. That's sort of an analogy for civil rights in America and so forth and so on, but I want you to actually
Starting point is 00:14:54 give... Can you give us the names of what you think these superheroes... the five superheroes, what are their names, do you imagine? The Avenger, Green Lantern, Incredible Hulk okay just plagiarizing actual superhero names Batman and Godzilla please make a t-shirt that is all of those things as X-Men that's what you should be doing your show about, my five guys. So, did I get any right? By the way, did I get any right?
Starting point is 00:15:27 I'm just curious. You could not have been more wrong, although Godzilla is a brilliant addition to the Marvel Cinematic Universe. Thank you. That the multiverse should welcome in, yeah. One more thing I was thinking about then was there's this story about how AI, open AI is like being sued by Scarlett Johansson because they're taking her voice and they're using that to be the voice of like our of course future dystopia. I think Greg Cody should be the voice of OpenAI. I
Starting point is 00:15:53 think there's a giant missed opportunity in not having Greg Cody be a voice option for your computer when it talks to you. Really? Can I say anything I want? Well, it would be a bunch of different things that would resemble artificial intelligence. So I have to talk according to what I'm asked to speak about. No, they use your voice to say whatever they want as you. Oh yeah, I don't know if I go for that. Alright, let's talk to Pablo about the serious parts of this instead of the parts about Greg Cody formulating a voice. The Scarlett johanson story has been a story here for a couple of years that i
Starting point is 00:16:29 don't believe is being covered very well because uh... she's rightfully pissed off about things that are being taken from her that are supposed to be hers in a changing technological world what are the areas of this story that are most uh... illuminating to you i think it's just how on the nose it is because it's all based on the fact that Sam Altman, the founder of OpenAI, I mean I think OpenAI is an incredibly impressive company that is almost less untrustworthy as a super villainous concept, like they're trying to kill everybody
Starting point is 00:17:01 on the planet. I don't think they're trying to do that. I think what they're just doing is clumsily trying to sell people products. I think capitalism is a story of artificial intelligence. And so there's this movie called Her in which Scarlett Johansson plays, her voice plays, the voice of the sentient general intelligence robot AI. And what Sam Altman did was essentially say to himself, that movie's cool. I want that to be real life artificial intelligence.
Starting point is 00:17:29 And it just leaves me not trusting him on the level of business. Like, it's so clumsy. The idea that you're using the apocalyptic movie voice to be the real life voice of the thing you're making in reality, it feels just deeply disconnected. It's sort of like how people watch movies and they don't know who the villains are. And I think Sam Altman is realizing, or maybe he's only now realizing, how on the nose it is for them to inhabit a fictional world in which AI is a nightmare and then try to sell
Starting point is 00:18:00 that to people under the guise of, man, this is awesome, isn't it? But the problem, right, is that they asked her to use her voice and then she's saying that she said no and then when the voice came out yesterday, it sounded exactly like her. And so she's now suing them over that. And then I think he also had a tweet a month or so ago, or maybe a couple of years ago, I'm not sure where he tweeted her,
Starting point is 00:18:24 like the name of the movie. so I think that is that not what the lawsuits about yes yes yes yes yes so what's happened is that Scarlett Johansson said no I don't want to do that and they basically have the powers to as they do simulate anyone's voice and so I think they're claiming that they hired a voice actress who is not Scarlett Johansson to do this but they hired essentially a Scarlett Johansson impersonator. And so whether or not they simulated her voice or hired a human who sounds a lot like her, it is exactly what an AI company, the caricature of one, would do.
Starting point is 00:18:59 And so yeah, Dan, what it does is it speaks to every sort of sense that you might have as someone who creates something That this company is not to be trusted that they're just going to take from real people To simulate those real people and use that real person's voice against their will to create more technology to do Exactly that forever. I want to ask the group of you what you think of when you think of a movie that was way ahead of its time I don't know if her is ahead of its time or of us or of it But of its time because that there were plenty of people living in this space before I was obviously I've aged out and uh... artificial intelligence all of it is sort of caught me off of go off guard but there were plenty of people living off the grid ten years ago when her made an appearance i want to ask the group to
Starting point is 00:19:53 think of the movie you most associate with being ahead of its time but what is happening with still gots right now billy i i don't understand uh... he is now in jail by himself no longer scott Scheffler has got him out. Got him out Dan yeah. Okay so now where's this story going Stu Godstaff? Well it's going with me sitting in prison by myself because the cops came in and they said listen only one of you can leave and I of course told Scotty hey you got big things to do today second round PGA go win that want to maker trophy I'm staying right here in this cell I'm staying right here
Starting point is 00:20:25 in this cell. I'm trying to win a bigger trophy that Pulitzer Prize thing you're always talking about. That is how that is how jail works. Who wants to get out? I can get one person out of here. Right. You do what you got to do for a friend. That's what you do. Kevin Durant has zero titles in my record book. Stu gotsbook.com. How about that, brothers? Do you guys understand how many different deals Stugots would parlay? Scotty Scheffler shouting at him like a man from the bottom of a well, help me! Can you help me? Like, can you imagine Stugots just waddling into a heroic arrest? You have no idea, buddy. Scotty, I can help you, but can you help me?
Starting point is 00:21:03 You have no idea buddy. Scotty I can help you but can you help me? If Stugatz can get his phone working to video Yeah, and not just turn his flashlight on and run into the woods. It'd be a selfie of him watching Scotty get arrested That's what you did, that's what Darley should have done I mean what the matter with him? He would have made it a cameo, Stugatz would have cam... It would have been if there could be body cam footage, but a cameo Stu gots would have recorded it. Yes and Blade Runner Dan I've asked the officers here. How long could I stay? They're not telling me I've asked I want to stay as long as I can hopefully you'll come get me out one day, Dan
Starting point is 00:21:35 You probably won't Scotty will though after he went to the PGA or finishes in the top five But I asked the cops they said listen it could be a while processing all this stuff everything. said listen. I'm in no rush. I'll stay here for as long as I can how about that? All right, I'm offering to stay in prison. I think the bid is over come back Come back in here and spend some time started with us and go ahead It's a hard time and imprison me in the hell I've lived in for the last 20 years just come right back in here and join us on the show Pablo before you came on We were talking about a couple of things. I wanted to get your opinion on lady books What do people want from their sports coverage? It's a general question
Starting point is 00:22:16 But sports fans it we're in dramatically changing times And it seems like every broadcast has a whole bunch of complaints about what the broadcast is the Modern age the new sports fan of tomorrow. What do they want from their sports coverage? I think they want their sports coverage to make them feel like the thing they're about to watch is the most important event on the world On the globe on the globe in the world in the universe. I think that what NBC got, right? What am I nostalgic for? I'm nostalgic for those NBC, NBA, Bob Costas essays, Stan, you remember those?
Starting point is 00:22:51 Yeah. Where it would be him for like two minutes setting up the stakes that made you feel like you're about to watch a clash of civilizations. I think that's what people want, is the idea that you're about to watch something important and something special. I think when it comes to studio shows everybody has been fooled into thinking that inside the NBA is the model and inside the NBA is the best
Starting point is 00:23:14 studio show in the history of studio shows but it's also unreplicable and so people are trying to do the thing that is impossible to do which is copy someone else's chemistry with people who don't have it. And so I think the biggest mistake that companies like ESPN make is the idea of, we're going to give you an imitation of something as opposed to selling you the event. And I think the event is the thing that matters. As much as I want to be, you know, a pro gas bag As much as I want to be a pro gas bag job creator, I think you got to focus on the event. Didn't ESPN do that though on Sunday? I mean, it was for New York, the biggest event on the globe.
Starting point is 00:23:56 I mean, I don't, look, I'm not, I don't want to just criticize ESPN studio coverage, but I would say that if you watched it and you watch Stephen A's Tunnel Walk, it was great for memes and bad for everybody else. And I think that's another tension in the world of how to broadcast games, is there are things that you can do for the internet audience for memes that are inherently funny. And I'm still talking about the Stephen A Tunnel Walk but to insert it into the presentation of here is the most important game in New York City you could argue in 50 years since 1973 I think that that was a
Starting point is 00:24:37 miscalculation even if it was tongue-in-cheek and funny and something that I laughed at I think you want to play it straighter. I got two words that improve every single broadcast around the nation. Bruce Buffer, you're welcome. I thought of a show ahead of its time, not a movie, but a show, The Jetsons. Correct. Yes. Still haven't gotten there.
Starting point is 00:24:59 Flying cars. We're getting close though. Robot maids. A show behind its time, The Flintstones. Yes, that's true. Different game, but yes, great point. George Jetson was riding a copter, you know, an individual copter. A spaceship, wasn't it?
Starting point is 00:25:17 Wasn't it a bit of a vehicle spaceship? It was an individual though. I think they were on Earth just floating. I don't think it was in space. They didn't fly rocket ships around they were driving cars Yeah, and now we're close to that you're gonna you're gonna be able to uber but in the air within a couple of years That is just not true. Put it on the pole By the year 2000 have that put it on the poll at Levitar Show,
Starting point is 00:25:45 are we going to be in flying Ubers in a couple of years? I'm reporting it, I mean I'm not speculating, it's happening. The salary of a sprocket, was he a sprocket salesman, a sprocket worker, what did he do for Spacely Sprockets? Sprockets, yeah. But what did he do? He was in an ancillary division,
Starting point is 00:26:02 unimportant as an employee. Well important enough that he was able to afford a robot maid and he had his flying car. He was like the Lewis of sprocket makers. He was somewhere in the back. Yeah, he was a mid-level executive. Think he got laid off. Wow, straight.
Starting point is 00:26:15 Did Lewis? I don't think he was a mid-level executive. I believe he was more of a factory worker, a labor man quashed by management. He wasn't dressed like a factory worker. No, he's a mid-level exec. White collar, literally. Not everybody was flying back then, but he was.
Starting point is 00:26:30 Pablo, thank you. Thank you, guys. See you tomorrow. It's that time again. The NBA playoffs are here. And boy, wouldn't it be cool to watch an NBA playoff game in person? Heck, yeah, it would. and what better way to do so
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Starting point is 00:27:21 I could also see Bad Bunny or Blink 182, Shakira and more! Cause Game Time has tickets to all the high profile events, not just sports. You know some of my favorite features on Game Time? I can go on the app and I can see the view from my seats. Cause sometimes it looks like they're gonna be great, but I have no idea until I get there. But with this feature I can actually see. Plus, they have the lowest price guaranteed. And as I mentioned, last minute deals.
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Starting point is 00:28:21 Download the Game Time app, create an account and use code Dan for $20 off your first purchase. Terms apply, again, create an account and redeem code D-A-N for $20 off. Download Game Time today. Last minute tickets, lowest prices, guaranteed. Don LeBretard. Yeah, very nice. Imagine if someone told you you couldn't have a Corvette.
Starting point is 00:28:40 Stugats. I'm a grown ass man who's not who's not filthy rich. I can't afford a Lamborghini. Well I probably can but that's... Whoa! Hey! Wow! This is the Don LeBathardt Show with the Stugats! We have some video to get to with Ron McGill of animals being tickled, a stingray being tickled, a baby gorilla being tickled. Ron, who is the most ticklish of the animals that you can delight in
Starting point is 00:29:16 just fooling around with and you will get a playful creature? You know, I don't usually play around with the wild animals. I mean, there are some dogs that I've had that have been very ticklish, but when you get into the wild animals, of course all the primates, you know, you see that. And then necessarily with the stingray there, not necessarily ticklish, it's more of a sensitivity. It might be kind of a defensive mechanism, you know,
Starting point is 00:29:39 because stingrays get eaten from the bottom. So it might be trying to do a tap. Oh, wait a minute, so we're showing this stingray torture video is what we're just showing it that could be yes it could be that's not necessarily like torture he looks like he's having a good time yeah well that's that you being a little anthropomorphic there are stingrays first of all shouldn't be on their back that's stressful in itself I don't know what that means let's go's go ahead and it's when you give human characteristics
Starting point is 00:30:07 to an animal. I would nominate, Dan, if I could jump in, I would nominate my dad as the ticklish, most ticklish animal. I could come in there and tickle him if you want, he is very ticklish. Let's not do that. Jess, that-
Starting point is 00:30:19 It's like you got a haircut, you look very clean cut today, though, don't you, Greg? Thank you, I appreciate that, Ron, thank you. Jess, that hell yeah with food in your mouth. Stingrays get eaten from us. I was gonna ask you. Oh God, you okay?
Starting point is 00:30:34 I mean, you're eating on the air. I paid myself five dollars. I was gonna ask you, Ron, because you know how humans will be like, don't tickle me, I'm gonna kick you, don't do it, I'm gonna hurt you. Is that what wild animals do, but then they actually will like maul you yeah If animals maul you it's because they are being defensive and they think they're being hurt
Starting point is 00:30:52 It's not because they're saying I don't want to be tickled. They think you're not tickling I think you're gonna hurt them. So that's probably where they'd be defensive that way But you know, there are other animals you can see baby chimps baby gorillas a lot of the apes They're ticklish like humans. You can see baby chimps, baby gorillas, a lot of the apes, they're ticklish like humans. You can see youngsters, they'll actually smile and show their teeth and give that classic ticklish response. But not all these responses, as an example, that stingray are being ticklish. They're actually being defensive. Steve McLaughlin, Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D.,
Starting point is 00:31:14 Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph.D., Ph being tickled i think this is actually tickling as well but i'm scared at what's walked into the room because that uh... since greg cody i was much younger uh... his son who is now an adult can tickle him in a way that will in range greg cody that greg cody is not but we don't do that out well your sons in here now and now we get to all enjoy before this gorilla video what Chris believes to be
Starting point is 00:31:46 the most ticklish creature in the entire animal kingdom. Yeah! Oh, yeah, come on! Mow him, Greg, mow his ass. He's old now, I feel bad doing this. I can get right under the armpits. Get his feet, get his feet. Okay.
Starting point is 00:32:01 Woo! I'm gonna get his feet. He does not like being tickled. Let's play the baby gorilla, though probably enjoys being tickled. enough okay well and i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i between an adult and an infant, and that is a classic, yes, that's tickling. Is there another animal that if you were to tickle it, would simply disembowel you? Like that somebody would feel comfortable enough to tickle and then be surprised that the next thing they know, they've got spikes in their eyes? A cassowary, a cassowary bird.
Starting point is 00:32:42 If you were able to get close enough to tickle it, yeah, once you tickle it, you'd be disemboweled. Ron, earlier in the show, we were talking about Victor Wemba Nyama and what he spent his first MBA check on, and he bought a Lego Millennium Falcon. Greg was unfamiliar and thought that it was an actual bird. So is it a bad idea or a good idea to buy an actual Falcon?
Starting point is 00:33:01 Can we do it and how much would it cost? In this country, you cannot do it and how much would it cost? In this country you cannot do it without a permit without having a bird of prey Falconers permit. I don't know what the price would be you know that would depend on the bird assuming that you had the permit and you were legally able to do so but in this country you cannot own a bird of prey without any type of special permit. About a hundred million for Kirk Cousins. Yeah. Hey. I'm asking myself.
Starting point is 00:33:26 In South Florida, there are any number of places where you will find exotic animals. If I wanted a Falcon, I could get a Falcon, Ron. So is it a good idea or a bad idea? It's a bad idea, you know what? If you wanted crack cocaine, cocaine you could get it too, it's a bad idea. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:33:42 So wait, hold on. Owning a Falcon is like doing crack cocaine They're both illegal How illegal is it to own a Falcon because South Florida has a whole lot of exotic pets and illegal pets We we can't I've got to assume do I have this wrong if you had to guess South Florida has more rule breaking in this regard than any other city in the United States. Ah, South Florida and Texas. Both of those states are pretty bad when it comes to exotic
Starting point is 00:34:10 animals. What is the strangest thing you have learned of a South Floridian owning as an animal where you would be like, how is that something that they own? They should not own that. That's not allowed. Now, it's the classic. It's the big cats, tigers, lions, leopards, incredibly venomous snakes, you know, the boon vipers, crates, spitting cobras. People own those things in this state. What's something that looks illegal, but is not illegal that I can own so I won't get in trouble, but people still think
Starting point is 00:34:39 I'm a bad boy. I can't think of one off the top of my head Billy you come up with the greatest questions. I don't know. Stumped. He is stumped. One that you can't answer. So in the interim let's just play him a video of a Falcon on cocaine please. Just in general a Falcon on cocaine. Two crimes. Oh geez. It's just Willie Falcone the cigarette. that's really bad uh... that's got that's not what i think of a couple of those don't ever do that again uh... the endowment of ron mcgill i will tell the audience again that the endowment of ron mcgill is something that doesn't have any paperwork
Starting point is 00:35:16 intermediaries is just him getting help to the animal kingdom the listeners of the show of raised millions of dollars for uh... ron mcgill substantive endowment uh... he missed last week show because of the high enough surgery uh... i didn't know that there was an emergency rate run of the hate but he was a procedure actually had to do an endoscope on a high enough because people were throwing trash onto the exhibit and i need a eight and you know if there's something that people can learn from this is please do on a hyena because people were throwing trash onto the exhibit and the hyena ate it.
Starting point is 00:35:45 And if there's something that people can learn from this is please do not throw things on the animal habitats. Not only is it against the rules, against the law, but you can hurt an animal. This animal could have potentially died from eating this crap that people throw on there to try to get an animal's attention when it might be resting in the shade
Starting point is 00:36:01 or doing something or doing nothing and they want it to do something. Folks, please, please, you don't understand the stress these animals can go through when we have to deal with this type of problem. Ron, I was at the zoo a couple weeks ago and I almost texted you because I saw, I don't remember the exact animal,
Starting point is 00:36:16 but it was like a deer-like animal and it was in that trench, that like safety trench that exists, I guess, so the animals can't come. Yeah, in the mode, it was probably a nyala. Okay, yeah, I think it was. They can just go down there and get back up and it's fine it's nothing to be alarmed about. Yep. Yep. Nothing to be alarmed about they go down in the moat all the time sometimes just to get shade sometimes just to have their own privacy. You know it's important to us that we can provide the animals a place to go
Starting point is 00:36:39 but they don't feel like they're constantly on on stage so to speak. Now sometimes sometimes the patrons get a lot, you know, I didn't see the animals time or was down in the moat. Understand that we have to look out for the animals welfare as much as we're trying to look out for the people to, you know, to be engaged. So, yeah, animals have a choice to be able to be in sight line and sometimes out of sight line. And depending on the day, especially on those hot days, they're going to look for the shade.
Starting point is 00:37:01 This is something that I've been wondering for a while. Are we going to get any cicadas down here, Ron? This is a little far south of them. It's a little warm right now. I have seen cicadas, but not these 13-year or 17-year ones that you're seeing up north right now. So we're not going to see that kind of onslaught, but they do occur here. Keep in mind, there are several species of cicadas and they do occur here.
Starting point is 00:37:24 And I have seen them on occasion. It's not something very common, but I've seen them down here in South Florida. First we don't get the Eclipse, then we don't get the Aurora Borealis, and now we're not getting the goddamn cicadas. We have 108 degree temperatures for you though, if you'd like. We have some of those. Hey Ron, in Australia, reportedly, a woman who looked just like my neighbor Shelly was swallowed whole by a 13-foot shark. Does that sound plausible? A 13-foot?
Starting point is 00:37:52 Because let's say she was 5 feet, 5 and a half feet. Could a 13-foot shark swallow a woman whole? And silently. Her friends didn't even notice she was gone, according to the report. Yeah, she was swimming with a group of friends and nobody knew that this shark Swallowed this woman whole plausible or no, it's it's feasible if she's five foot tall and fairly thin framed Yeah, that's not I mean, she's not gonna it's not gonna inhale it like you would inhale She's it's gonna keep the body's this I don't know
Starting point is 00:38:21 I'm getting into this detail the body is gonna be bitten some but it will gulp it down as it's biting, biting, biting. If you ever watch a shark eat, you'll see how they do that. They just bite, gulp, bite, gulp. It doesn't mean that he's gonna... Oh god, this is awful to talk about. Poor Shelly. He's gonna like dismember her or tear her apart in different places, but he's gonna... Why is StuGott's laughing so badly?
Starting point is 00:38:41 This is really horrible. You have told us that a human being cannot live for very long inside of either a shark or a whale, that they would die almost immediately. Yes, absolutely. Even a whale? Yeah, I don't know about that. Yeah, come on. I've seen Pinocchio too many times.
Starting point is 00:38:55 Listen, guys, there are enzymes in your stomach, in your stomach, a human stomach, that if not protected by a certain lining, would just burn you up. That's when you get a bad ulcer, you get some bad, you know, digestive problems is when you don't have the lining protecting you from those enzymes that basically digest food. But it seems like there's a lot of space in there, Ron. You know what, you watch too many Pinocchio movies, you guys. It's not Pinocchio, brother. I feel like in a whale I could stand on my hind legs and and and not even be able to touch the ceiling signal but i think don't touch the enzymes are not good right how many pinocchio movies out there
Starting point is 00:39:32 the ceiling couple of pinocchio movies ceiling of a whale thank you for your expertise uh... greg cody uh... last week we're having the argument about whether a woodpecker damages its brain, face, head, beak when it pecks? No! This is what's incredible about woodpeckers. If you would look at them anatomically, their tongue actually goes all the way around their brain, their head. It's basically like a shock absorber. So they have this incredible shock absorber. Their tongue is so long. Every time they peck, that tongue comes out, goes all the way into the hole to get the insects. But in the meantime, it
Starting point is 00:40:04 goes around their head and acts like a shock absorber So it's an incredible anatomy that woodpeckers have that protects any kind of brain damage Ron. It is always good seeing you Thank you for making the time. I'll tell the listeners again. If you want a good cause Ron McGill's really does help the animals I'm here to vouch for it And he is an honorable man and only occasionally does he buy with your charitable funds are clothing and cadillac thank you ron good seeing you i think that there are a lot of real quick because pablo was on with us and he said he wants his basketball games his sporting events to feel like the
Starting point is 00:40:39 biggest thing in the world john tesh is going to join us later john tesh is given us the only exclusive rights to music that we have around here his song does this sound like your sporting event is the biggest on the planet he just gave it over to us he owns owns that sound. He gave it to us. And John Tesh is going to join us to make us happy with that music later. Since the dawn of mankind, we've cooked our food over and over in flame and debated the best way to grill. One thing not up for debate, grilling and beer always go together.
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