The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz - Hour 2: Here Come The Elliots
Episode Date: June 12, 2023DOMMMMMMMMM! Stugotz kicks us off with his Weekend Observations and includes a new game: Lundqvist for your Life. Then, Billy tells us an incredible story from his security run-in at the Florida Panth...ers Stanley Cup game. Plus, Tyler Herro has been upgraded to Questionable for Game 5, Dan feels robbed over some new info about the Stanley Cup that was in our studio last week, and clams. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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You're listening to Giraffe King's Network.
This is the Dunlabel Tarshall with the Stugat's Podcast.
In this time for Stugat's to share his game notes,
no one in the media will tell you what happened better than my boy's stew.
Weekend observations brought to you by Miller Light, great taste, 96 calories available
for delivery.
DUMM! The sport is truly out of crossroads, divided in a way that it has never been.
But a few things remain sacred.
The more things change, the more they remain the same.
This week, we get to witness one of those things.
Everything gets thrown aside
because Dom, make no mistake about it.
US Open Week is back.
Yes.
Excited?
Are we allowed to be excited?
Yeah, what about it?
I mean, let's open.
Mayn't have fight.
Live in the may, like all of it.
It's a major though.
Oh, oh, oh, okay.
The second biggest factor. We're back. Yeah, we're good. Oh, oh, oh, okay. The second biggest decided.
We're good.
Yeah, we're good.
Cool, we're good.
Dom, the fear you're always talking about.
Do me a favor.
Shove it with a sun, don't shine.
Well, that makes it more fun.
The arena announcer.
Yeah, this is fun.
Yeah.
Down 3-1, down 3-1.
I thought the sun.
The country laughing at you. I was talking about the sign not shining
The arena announcer
Thanking Conor McGregor as the heat mascot is being dragged off the floor and not knowing
The person in the mascot costume has been knocked out cold is the height of sports entertainment. I've never felt
older than I did 20 seconds ago when I rode out shove it with a sun don't
shine. It's pretty, it's pretty, oh it's also pretty light like it's not. You
also like I'm white. I'm white. I'm white. I'm white when you get mad. I do. Yeah. Yeah.
Tip of the cat.
To Novak, Jokovic.
All winning is 23rd major.
Adforcing me to adjust my top five tennis players of all time.
Number five.
Martina Navratilova.
Number four.
Pete Sampress. Number three, Roger Federer.
Number two, Serena Williams.
And number one, Novak Jokevich.
Sampress over Rafa?
Yeah, listen, I don't like Rafa.
He, it's too weighted, the Grand Slamms.
He's won too many times at the French.
And the French is a weird tournament, as you know.
Who is San Francisco?
Where is one there?
I'm mad.
We're gonna have to speak to him.
I mean, there are guys that win the French
and don't win anything else.
Head to head.
Head to head.
You got San Chris over an adult?
No chance.
Match for my life?
Yeah.
Oh boy.
Alcharez.
So, where my money's going?
Yeah, you lost. I would say he's
I'll kind of as better than Samperus. He got hurt though. Don't need. Cramps. He did. Yeah,
he got hurt. Yeah. He's good. I think I think wipes a floor with Samperus. So you're
saying Samperus and the doll not on clay though. You pick the surface. Okay. He's one
plenty on hard. He's one plenty on grass. I'll take grass. I would.
Oh, but no one's better on grass than Pete Samperous. I mean, Rafa, Rafa beat Roger
Federer at the peak of his power is on grass. Look at the majors and how they're weighted.
He's won too many French open. Is he's the greatest clay court player? I'm not doing this.
It's a weird tournament. It's a weird tournament. This is white or campus. This is the whiteest of the ever on the French.
And I'm filled with that.
I prefer you never winning the French.
I mean, he's gonna hit you with a for crying out loud
real soon, weird surface.
The only way we can get whiter is if we're arguing
about Eric Clapton.
Eric, who's that?
Here come the aliens.
Can you spit?
Clap, got some bars.
Are you watching the aliens? Are you seeing what's going on with the aliens? There's aliens. Oh, alien. And redacted video because
Aliens. Private property. No, you definitely said Aliens. Yeah, I said you're coming
Aliens. I heard Aliens. I was trying to play along. Oh yeah.
Please let Brooks Keppga, who hasn't slept in a month when the US opened.
Dom, since you shared your gambling advice
of betting against the A's with us on this show,
you know what I've done?
I've taken a bath.
Here's some gambling.
What? Here's some gambling advice for you
Keep your gambling advice to yourself
My dog Finnie was sleeping on my jet blanket over the weekend and my wife was sitting right next to up
I walk past them and I said Abby don't sleep on the jets. She gave me the loser game shows ad
You deserve that keep me. That's a good joke. That's a good one. Thank you. Don't sleep on the jets. She gave me the loser game shows ad You deserve that keep me. That's a good joke. That's a good one. Thank you. Don't sleep on the jets. Thank you
Might want to keep an eye on the O's
They're good the Orioles can mash
Me and they can choose it puffs crack cocaine
Dom you know what this C and cheese it puff stands for?
Crack cocaine.
Oh, I got a cookin' down.
Yep.
Nothing but must wins for the heat and the panthers,
the rest of the way.
Sports heaven.
John Sterling calling a foul ball coming directly at his head
and not knowing it until it hit him in the noggin
is Pete John Sterling noggin
another great white person.
Great.
Put him right up there.
Never out there, bud.
Yeah.
Protect the noggin.
Dom, with a heat and pathers down 3-1, you of course know where their backs are, right?
Against the wall.
You are good.
You are good.
They are up against the wall. Amazing are good. You are good. They are up against the wall.
Amazing. I'd already want them to be. Yeah. Stash this away in these something to ponder file.
Do the Yankees and Red Sox only play each other.
No need to discuss it now. Just stash it away for a rainy day.
to discuss it now. Just stash it away for a rainy day. But they did.
Panthers down three one, heat down three one. You know where our local teams have been pushed to, Dom? The brink. Oh my God, you are good.
I had that one wrong. I thought it was up against the wall again.
His brink of elimination at backup, the brink truck, the only time we use the word brink.
Yeah, it is, right?
That's it.
There's done another sentence we use it in.
It's like stave.
We only use stave when we're talking about the NCAA tournament.
Yeah.
Staving off elimination?
Gotta stave it.
Yeah, that.
Are we certain Las Vegas is going to be able to distinguish
between the Stanley Cup Par parade and what normally goes on on any given day there
Victor Wembenyama struggles in pro-A finals loss exactly
Classic case of putting the court the cart before the horse. How do you get win by Yammer right and then get caught up on?
I'm stuck out of cart the horse. How do you get win by Yammer, right? And then get caught up on the car.
Car. Car.
Thanks for pointing that out. Huh? Wembee.
And the guy he can play car before the horse a little bit.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Eight points.
Man, it's not a car.
Eight points.
Man.
In this week's edition of June, Stetson Bennett had some words for this senior ball executive
director.
Braden, Phil Hoco, bemoans the diminishing importance of nose tackles and Latavius
Murray hopes to bring a championship to Buffalo.
As long as Stetson Bennett is alive, he will have words for somebody. You agree?
Absolutely. Always has words for
someone. We are a heat and
panthers lost away from it being
just me, you baseball at Joey
Chestnut. By the way, Latavius
Murray, the Bills May win a
championship, but I could promise
you this.
It won't be because you brought them one.
I mean, who is Latavius Murray?
I mean, he might make a big play.
Hey, go nice.
They're bringing them anything.
Difference maker.
Dom, my wife did that thing again.
Henrich Lungquist popped onto my television screen
and she took a sudden interest in hockey by asking,
who is that?
Dude, same.
Really?
My wife thought Wayne Gretzky was Mori Povitch,
but she wanted to know all about King Henry.
You know what the H and Henrich stands for?
Hong Kong.
And hair.
By the way, my wife asked the same question about Wayne Gretzky.
Is he more in Povix?
For a totally different reasons.
Just who is that?
I told her it was Gretzky.
She refused to believe that.
I mean, Jalen Hertz is that version in my house.
Jalen Hertz.
Handsome man.
Really?
Yeah.
Ho.
Great lips. My wife pointed it out to me. Now I can't stop seeing it. Really? Yeah. Ho. Great lips.
My wife pointed it out to me,
now I can't stop seeing it.
I see him like damn.
King Henry is way too good looking
to also have such great fashion sense.
Like you can't have both.
You usually gotta punt on one.
Long-wist.
It's a double.
When Miami sports fans come out on the other side
of the heat and panthers run, they are
going to realize they have a nice little baseball team.
Headline, special moment, Andrew McCutcheon with 2000 hit, hate to inform you, he's one thousand hits away from a special moment.
Couch, Neil Everett, hell of a run, Mahalo, speaking of help, orprials, Dom, mailed it,
those are the weekend observations.
Cooler Lankweth.
Henrik G Vern? Ooh.
Lunkwish for your life.
Henrik.
Lunkwish.
Vern.
Vern looks like a bubble.
Hey, don't yuck our yums.
I'm a Vern guy too.
Give me some Vern.
Vern is cool, man.
Who's a Vern?
That is sexy, confident.
Lunkwish for your life is it like a three-point shot contest or just one of them?
What are they doing?
They're obviously on a catwalk.
They're having a catwalk competition.
To save your life.
Yeah, you got to see who wins.
So, it's doing our sitting in the right wood.
And we're like, all right, there's a punt panel of judges.
Lungquist for your life.
And the Lungquist for your life is obviously a strut off.
Gimme Verne. En la vida de la vida de la vida es la de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de la vida de pero lo más aterradores no saber en qué confiar. Uy de las personas que os piden que mireis,
si queréis seguir convido.
Birdbox, Barcelona.
Estreno en Netflix el 14 de julio.
Te atreves a ver.
Don Lebatard.
¿You know what a Razer is, Dan?
No, no, no, no.
¿Qué motorola Razer es?
¿No?
No, yo bet que yo habÃa una.
No, no. ¿Qué? ¡Let's walk through your phone history! ¿Qué? I don't know what a Motorola razor is. You don't? No. I bet you you had one.
I did not have one.
Really? Let's walk through your phone history.
I've never had a Motorola razor.
I did not have a Motorola razor.
What was your first phone?
Not a Motorola razor.
Telegraph machine after that.
The Motorola razor, Dan, was the one that was really, really thin
that it flipped over, but it was like as thin as a razor blade.
That's why they called it the razor.
What is a telegraph machine? I don't know they had one in down nabby
stugats! the Titanic stop has sunk in stop! John take a bath to a stop!
is missing stop! you think that was my phone? you think that my first phone was the titanic's
phone was the Titanic's emergency signal. This is the Don't Liberty Show with this two-gats.
Mike Ryan mentioned correctly how good the hockey coverage is on TNT with a crew of people
who are having fun and are super knowledgeable. Also another great show
that has emerged. God bless football does very well a lot of fun in the off season. They've
been doing it for years where they're not just doing football all the time, but they had
the former general manager of the Cardinals on who told the great story the other day.
Steve Keim Is his name?
You said God bless football.
I know it was like, do they do a good job?
Good morning, football.
God bless football also does it.
I remember you had Steve Kym.
I was trying to remember what we had online.
I mean, Steve Kym, wow, this is very flattering.
And you've been doing it for years.
Yeah, well, I haven't.
Yeah, it's a good morning, football, my bad.
He told the story of going to dinner.
This is exactly, um, how I imagined going to dinner with Joey Bosa would go.
He went to dinner with Joey Bosa before the draft.
And I, I'm going to guess that it was before the Kyler Murray draft.
Um, and Joey Bosa told him after dinner, while putting him in a headlock,
while putting him in a headlock,
if you take anyone other than me,
I will haunt you for the rest of your career.
And Kaim said on the show I like to call God bless football,
that is actually good morning football.
He said, and he did, and he has.
He was absolutely 100% right. It's a I put
on the pole, please, Jude, you at Levitard show. Do you expect to be in a headlock after dinner
with the Moses? Those those brothers, their father was a famous dolphin bus to then became a strip club emprasario,
but those brothers...
What a great sentence.
Yeah, it is a great sentence.
One of the better ones I've heard today, second best to after the President's former
President's first indictment is what, is that what sentence started early?
From one bus to another.
I'd eat down here in the bosses.
Down here how?
Just keep it moving.
I'm afraid to run into them tomorrow, yeah.
Well, let's get into this because Mike thinks
it's a bad idea for us to be anywhere near this trumpet.
I just want to, does anyone think it's a good idea?
Reveal yourself.
Well, what is the content playing?
What are we trying to accomplish by being there? I'm just trying to make my tail in happy. There is a seismic journalistic event happening blocks
from us and we're going to stay indoors hiding. You mean the NBA finals? That's not happening here
anymore. It'll be back then. It'll be back. Give it a couple years. Back to get to corner.
Maybe if you want to break. And then a couple more years after that.
Stayed just these last time this group of people got together
and were upset about something.
Yeah.
Something happened.
It was January 6th.
And I don't want to be around them.
Just do a flash paper.
Hey, what do you think about Nick Cousins mixing it up?
Colin White said his name on that trophy before. What do you think about Colin White?
Well, they love Colin White. Oh
We are around them. We are on the fringes of this. We will be driving into work around them
You will be walking taking the train around them. Yeah, I've seen them. It's it's an intimidating presence
It's a it's truly the dumbest timeline and it's an honor to be living in it
It's a truly the dumbest timeline and it's an honor to be living in it in some respects because it's so dumb and
Dangerous and I don't necessarily feel great about being put on the teeth of it But I also know that you want someone to go and you go on as a bad idea
I was downtown DC for the last insurrection
And I wasn't there for the insurrection.
Part one.
Yeah, yeah, for part one because it's smoke coming.
But I was doing first take remotely from the DC studio
and I got there at like 6.30 in the morning
and I parked in the garage that I normally parking
as normally empty and there were three pickup trucks,
no surprise there parked right next to each other
with a bunch of guys just standing around talking
and I parked and I had to walk by them
and they stopped talking, I had nothing to say
and we all just kept our eyes on each other
and I went upstairs, we started doing first take
and I'm not paying attention to the world
because locked in me and Stephen A going,
I had it doing battle, I don't know,
maybe wasn't Stephen A with somebody.
And then the show ends, I'll let that go.
You had to concentrate on your take,
so you had no time for where threats were,
where actual threats were.
My main takeaway is I feel a little bit better
considering how difficult it is to park a pickup truck
and downtown Miami.
Well, you guys got garages,
and I don't think they respect the law.
I don't think that parking enforcement
is gonna slow down the decision-maker process.
But anyway, I come out and it is chaos.
Tomorrow will still somehow feel safer to me
than it did at the Clevelander.
No doubt.
I say that to say, if you're going down there
with real journalistic aspirations,
then I get it, I respect it, and more power to you.
You're going down there to ask some silly questions.
That better be some real funny stuff,
that content better be fine.
Well, we almost had fire content last week.
Who saw Forcelain can only get you so far communically?
Last week, when the Stanley Cup was here,
I have found through informed sources
that Billy Gill was plotting. No, conspiratorially. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no So here's the thing. I'm a hockey journalist now.
And I was covering the Stanley Cup final last week.
No, you are copying and pasting Roy Belly's tweets.
And then tweeting them out on your profile.
I was retweeting Roy, thank you very much.
So I was out there reporting on what was happening
in the Stanley Cup final.
A retweet is not what you were doing.
I did retweet what he tweeted.
And then you tweeted it out yourself.
I retweeted it.
Okay.
So I was covering the Stanley Cup Final on Thursday.
I got the mirror really go.
Then I went back on Saturday and I covered them again.
But my coverage was slightly different on Saturday.
It got off to a bit of an eventful start
when I was trying to get through security.
And some people in this room are aware of what happened because word has spread
as to what happened it's glorious this is this is going to be worth it down
waiting for billy's punchline well so here's i know the punchline no you don't know
this one this is a security this is a security situation
all other animal you did have to be the i almost was there i almost wasn't
here with what happened in security so i was walking through security and i
you know put my wallet my phone all that and then the security alarm went off
It started beeping and sometimes my belt buckle will have that happen
So I I said you know my belt buckle set it off and the security guard told me can't bring any guns in here
And I looked at him straight in the eye and I said what about these two?
And then I gave him the tongue sticking it out and then I turn with your biceps
My biceps yeah dangerous game when you're kind of joking with the security guard about bringing guns into a venue
It killed he loved that he loved that joke. So I was writing high
There's a tongue out there. That's what it was. It was it was a good reaction. I was playing to my crowd
So anyways, we're there, we're covering the game,
a couple seats away from Roy.
We kind of know with Roy and things aren't going well,
Roy's getting really grumpy,
all this game's going on.
And I kind of know, like, let me give Roy his space.
Let me not get too involved in this.
Maybe this isn't the day to be retweeting Roy, you know what I mean?
Because it didn't seem like he was down for that that day.
So I didn't do that.
So we go down in one of the intermissions. I say, you know what, this is, you know, this is a
momentous occasion, my brother and I, family members, very
excited about the pandas. Let me get them a little keepsake. Let me
go down to the store right now before the second intermission.
So we go to do that. We may have missed one of the goals while
we were doing this. So we missed the first goal. Cougs has to go
to the bathroom. It's a whole ordeal. So then intermission comes
and it's really busy. We're waiting at the elevator forever.
Forever we're waiting at the elevator, we get in the elevator, we go down a floor, and
then the elevator doors open and a familiar face walks into the elevator.
And it was none other than Mike, the keeper of the cup that was here last year.
Wow.
Mike Bolt.
That's right.
Mike Bolt.
Now, I can tell you a tale about that Stanley cup if you'd like it
But I was sworn to secrecy by Roy, but I'm willing to betray it if you would like that information
Yep give it to me fake Stanley cup was here last week
Idiots there's no there's three of them yeah, and Mike Bolt is the one that's assigned to the one that just does the media round
So the one that's assigned to the one that just does the media rounds so the pick the one that you're late off.
No wonder we got late off.
What?
Because he wasn't the main cup guy.
It all makes sense because he said he got late off during COVID and I was like how could
they lay off the keeper of the cup.
But if he's just the media cup guy, no one is doing media.
Are you shitting me?
They were fraud.
They perpetrated on us and our audience.
Mike was so odd.
I was odd by the fake cup.
I just like to say thanks for listening to Godless hockey because this terrain has already
been covered. I was outraged. I said, Roy, that cannot be so. And he said, please don't
tell Dan because Dan will bring it up. I knew the day before the fake cup was coming.
He said, please don't tell Dan that's going to get out on air. And then it's going to
make things really awkward because when he said, oh, Mike's coming. Mike is not the keeper
of the cup. I know that's not his name. It's Phil. Yeah. Because when he said, oh Mike's coming, go, Mike is not the keeper of the cup.
I know that's not his name.
It's Phil.
Yeah, I knew that it wasn't Mike.
Wow.
So I said that's something's not adding up
and then he told us there's three Stanley cups.
There's the one that lives in the Hall of Fame,
the one that goes around on media tours
and the one that the players actually get.
So anyways, we get into the elevator,
we see Mike coming in.
And guess what Mike was not with?
The Stanley Cup.
So Cougs goes to him, he says,
hi, he's very comfortable as if Mike just remembers
everybody that he runs into,
and he goes, hey, where's the cup?
And he goes, I left it at the hotel,
and I'm like, wait a minute, hold on a second,
and I now feel bad saying his name
and putting his business out there.
But we ride down the elevator, it's a little more small talk,
he gets out, he seems to be excited for this whole thing,
then I think it's a whole chore
for him walking around Stanley Cup.
So I go to Cougs, I go as soon as he leaves, I go, you think what I'm thinking?
And he goes, what?
I go, now's our time to steal the Stanley Cup.
I mean, it's just a loan in a hotel room here.
He just told us that this Stanley Cup is by itself in a hotel room.
Very reckless, I might say, by Mike.
But it was our chance.
We could have had the Stanley Cup.
He just go down there. You say, hey, you know you know or friends with Mike Bolton or whatever's name is
Mike Bolton just give me you know the key to the room spoon walk out with a Stanley cup
It was my chance and I let it go you think his name is Michael Bolton
I don't know
I'm horrified that none of this is real well you should be happy because I was gonna blame you for the loss because you didn't mind
Get your hands all over that fake ass thing
Yeah, fake.
And you know, that's why we're down three one.
Wait, so do they dent the fake Stanley cups to match the dents of the real Stanley Cup?
Because there were dents on it.
I also.
I did them hurt.
Is the real Stanley Cup the one in the Hall of Famer the one that the player is good?
Yeah.
Because like, it's not Mike.
It's the one you get on the ice.
That's the one I got.
Ah.
Don Lebertard. Hey everybody. the one you get on the ice like that's the one I got. Ah! Don't live a tart.
Hey everybody.
Not here.
Okay, come to the phone.
See, doesn't that sound better?
Everybody.
No, it does not.
It does not sound better.
It sounds.
He is absolutely slurring.
He is hey everybody.
By the way, not surprising at all that he would answer the phone and think just everybody is
That's only one person calling it's everybody still got
19 Miller lights deep
He was 19 Miller lights deep. We were talking.
It's everyone calling him at the same time.
Everybody.
He's doing a little show.
A little show.
Everything is good content.
It's like he's a Trin Gregg Cody.
Hi, everybody.
This is the Don Lebathar Show with his two gods.
Yeah!
All right.
Yeah! All right!
Yeah! Why are we happy?
Yeah!
Yeah!
We're happy!
Yeah!
Yeah!
Yeah!
Yeah!
All right!
All right!
I'm just so happy!
Yeah!
I just like this. Crazy, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he He's just like a crazy, he's...
Hooray!
Hooray!
Hooray!
That is the enthusiasm of Tyler Hero being upgraded to questionable.
Questionable!
Oh yeah!
That's the question there!
So happy!
Questionable.
It is, I imagine, hard to just sort of fly into the NBA Finals after not playing for
a long time and get up to speed.
I remain rattled before we even get into the news of the moment by that that cup of Zarconia news from the Stanley Cup thing.
I'm just jared at how I've been lied to the way that,
the way that I've been lied to the way,
I don't know, I've heard people who are robbed
to feel like a certain violation that makes it deeply
personal where you just sort of feel helpless
when people steal your things.
I feel that this lie of the Stanley Cup is something that I was enjoying a moment last week
that is no longer pure and I can enjoy this Tyler hero news with you because I'm legitimately rattled by what just happened here.
The revelation. I didn't want to do it. I got to be honest. I didn't want to do it. And I was going back and forth tossing and turning at night.
And Roy said, please don't do it.
I said, I don't want to do it.
I don't want to be the person to say that there's multiple.
Did Dase, did Mike say the Stanley Cup or us Stanley Cup?
You didn't, he pretended like all our questions were valid.
He didn't give us any hints.
And we were looking at an imposter cup.
It's funny.
I came in last Friday and Roy said, do not tell them. Don't
tell them what happened. How come Roy knew? Roy knows. I mean, because he cares about hockey.
So Roy lied to all of us really. That's actually very nice of Roy understanding how happy
it made us. And remember, Roy wasn't in the office that day. And I felt very bad about
it. But I guess Roy had the last laugh knowing that we were all parading around a fake trophy.
I feel disgusting.
Those pictures made me so happy.
And I look back on it now, feeling like a fool.
Take that photo down.
Take it down.
Take that down.
Take that photo down.
I was pointing at the only true one cup in that room
at Gavacito Cup.
I was shared coffee sita with Michael Bolton.
Wow.
Can't hoist it.
If anyone's off the hook, it's Dan because he just put his paws all over that thing.
Did you really?
Yeah, he doesn't realize the tradition around it that you don't touch the Stanley Cup.
Like, didn't say something.
Dan would have made it very awkward and uncomfortable if you knew.
That's why I was I think it was good producing. I think it was more so Roy. Roy wasn't
worried about your feelings. He was worried about like offending Michael Bolton ruining the
second. Yeah, but what a dirty secret for Roy to keep like I don't even know.
Dirty secret. I think that Roy had to feel the way that like made off and all the dirty fraudsters who know their frauds,
how they have to feel in the shadows when others are thinking that something is authentic.
Victimless crime. Victimless crime. Roy was trying to give you guys joy. Roy is a joy giver.
And it's like, barely is not. It's like the Sanley Cup said I love you, but lied. Oliver, you'll.
The fool's game with his Michael Bolton's playing.
I am the victim here.
Don't say it's a victimless crime.
I feel hurt by being lied to.
You may disregard my hurt if you'd like to, but I feel legitimately hurt.
So you're not hurt by being lied to.
You're hurt by being told the truth.
That's true.
That's actually the truth of a scenario.
It was.
You were fine when you were being lied to.
Happy with your claim.
I had such a special place in my heart for these photos.
Yeah.
And now they're gone.
Tell me, how am I supposed to live without you?
Well, maybe there was like an old switch of rule,
you know what I mean?
And Mike Bolton actually had the real cup and Phil Pritchard's been, you know like sometimes
when you go around and you have like the really-
Like a parent trap situation?
Yeah, kind of.
What if the cups are pretending to be each other because one of them likes Phil and one of them likes Michael Bolton?
I'm thinking more so like, oceans 12, you know what I mean?
Where like they have the Faberger egg.
And they have the fake one is the one that's really being moved under guarded
a situation, and then the real one is just casually,
like, ah, someone's just walking down the street
with it tossing it up like a baseball.
You know what I mean?
What a reveal at the end of that movie, by the way.
Spoiler alert.
Do we need some origins stories on happy as a clam?
Does anyone here know happy as a clam?
Why is it because the clam, when it looks like it's smiling,
the shell, like what is the, what I don't have.
I'm pretty, I'm pretty sure that's what it is.
Maybe you're right, I don't look it up.
I have a friend who goes happy as a clam.
He sticks his tongue out.
Okay.
You guys are so comfortable.
I always think of it as primarily an audio medium. And you guys are so comfortable making jokes that are so comfortable. I always think of this as primarily an audio medium and you guys
are so comfortable making jokes that are only videos. That's your criticism of that.
It's our directing people to youtube.com slash. I thought you were going to say you're so
comfortable with it. Do you think everything you say is worth being said, but no. So the
problem with the happy at the clam is that it's a really audio audience. There is a terrible joke.
There is actually a very interesting backstory
to happy as a clam.
We've apparently been shortening that cliche.
It's actually happy as a clam at high water
because high tide is when clams are free
from the intentions of predators.
Surely the happiest time for a mollusk.
Still was right.
Happy as a clam.
That's cute.
I would think of the entire species as not being happy.
I would think it would be a depressed, dark existence.
They don't even have brains.
They don't even have brains.
Like they don't even know.
They don't feel, they're actually nihilist.
Well, if you don't have a brain.
Breathe eating clams now.
What are you doing?
Put it on the pole, please, that Lebitard show.
Can you be happy if you don't have a brain?
Yes, I guess ignorance is bliss.
Man people who are listening closely just got a treat.
That's the point of just making the joke quietly and letting it sit as opposed to
Linguist reference. Hey, hey, so somehow made it about Connell English nailed it. Ah
J.E. skates for the athletic
Come on Of all the names of all the names
Can't go eat him clam to J skates
J skates from the athletic windows at all.
writes it's time to address something that's been nagging at me the entire
playoffs. How exactly do we describe Jimmy Butler's place in NBA
history? It's going to be hard.
It's going to be complicated. It's going to be a lot more complicated
if he doesn't win it because that could be the argument ender and the perfect end to
a story arc for this ultra competitive guy that just found a way to up his game in the
playoffs. But if he only rides it out to like two runners up. But he's had some of the
most legendary post game postseason games we've ever seen. Yeah, but it's just going to be like one of those,
he's going to be an answer on trivia night if he doesn't lift the Lerio Brian.
Is that the way that we're going to measure this?
trivia night.
Yeah, this stuff, is it going to be laughable?
Never mind in 10 years or five years, but in a week when people think of us describing
this is the best time in South Florida sports history and it producing two second place finishes
Best time to be a hater
Did get messy
Blame messy
Yeah, there's there's some people saying well, this is the penance for messing and to me I'm not here for it
Not worth it. Get rid of messy. I would like a trophy
Although it did make me right. I do like that. Well, I was making fun
unrelentingly of Mike Sher because nobody in the national media, not a soul,
was as right about the Miami Heat as he was and he didn't get to enjoy it at all.
The being being right is one of the great gifts that this gas bag medium gives you when you can just be publicly right.
My father was so happy the other day
that he said before game four
that Yokech has weak ankles.
What it's all about.
My gosh, I forgot about that.
He nailed that.
But I'm saying, Mike sure was only a thousand times
more right about what it is that he feared
and got to enjoy it not at all because he was the person screaming in the horror house
that the killer was coming and nobody was listening to him.
I felt terrible when I said before game two that maybe the Panthers should think about
Benching Bob and then the Panthers gave us seven goals that game.
It felt really bad, Dan.
You were right.
Sometimes being right isn't what it's cracked out to be.
I'd rather be wrong sometimes and be right.
I'll let you know what it's like if I'm never wrong.
Can you do me the favor, please,
of getting me the Charles Barkley sound of him
just saying, Babrowski's name again,
because I need some tickling here.
And I have, I have one, Stugat.
I'm freezing in this segment.
Call Chris Cody.
He also said horror house.
Yeah, and it sounded like horror house.
House of horrors haunted house is what I meant.
The winner of the pardon my take of the week last week was me
for saying that America hates a yoke itch.
I was surprised by how it is that that took off.
Hates is not the word I should have used because I don't think that he rises the passions
up to a place where there is hatred.
But I do think a lot of people feel about him the way that Stugat's does, which is that
excellence isn't flashy enough for them.
It doesn't have quite enough personality for them,
even as people leave the arena consistently,
like stupified by what they've just seen.
Like, oh, you know, Lil Wayne and others,
leave being like, I've never seen anything
that exists like that in basketball.
But you leave confused asking yourself,
how, I wanna leave actually in awe.
Like, I wanna be in awe of the guy.
But those are the same thing.
No, they're not.
I watched Michael Jordan.
I was in awe of him.
But you were also how?
You were also how?
No, I was like, whoa.
So it wasn't that.
Big difference.
Yes.
Oh yeah.
Very big difference.
I mean, I watched joke,
because I'm like, huh?
Oh, well, that's different.
I watched Jordan.
I'm like, whoa.
Wait, which is it?
Because we're in how and how and how are three different things?
There are three different states of emotion. You just downgraded your how to a
huh? That's totally different. I think the hush should be before the whoa and the how.
I think you hawn game one. Then you how all the games after you don't whoa until he catches the alley Which he's not gonna
Never
No, no, no, just a huh just a huh and then how
When I want you know, I want to watch the best player in the world and go whoa
I feel like there's been a lot of mm-hmm at least for me and At least for me and why it's in these heat games. A lot of that. A lot of mmm-hmm-hmm.
It is a slow torturous way to end the season
to have that just sort of move.
Look at how happy Jessica is.
Jessica is... Ah, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, Lee, what's the score? Because I'm in the other room, I'm not even watching. Oh wow. Not much I don't care.
I honestly think South Florida is good.
Well, we'll have a bleacher report graphic, like I mentioned,
but just won't end.
South Florida is great.
I just don't like any of their sports teams.
I like Miami.
Miami's nice.
Really?
Yeah.
Oh, okay.
Why are you so surprised?
Terrible.
Terrible infrastructure city.
Terrible.
Why are you so surprised that she likes Miami? Why are you so surprised? Terrible. Terrible infrastructure city. Huh? Terrible.
Why are you so surprised that she likes Miami?
Why are you so defensive?
Relax.
My place.
It's not.
You don't own Miami.
Hmm.
Whoa.
How?
Play the Buprofsky sound of Barclay plays.
I wish I could, but it decided to not work.
I can play for you, right?
Yeah, I was issuing warnings.
Guys, I don't think I'm going to have a Bob guy.
I hope he forgets. Yeah, I was issuing warnings guys. I don't think I'm gonna have pop up guy. I hope he forgets
Oh, he didn't
Dominique we flew you down here for this
Actually, no you didn't no, we flew him down for a different reason. I mean you also didn't fly me down
I got my own flight. Okay, you're away. Yeah
You I believe that's tampering I mean you want to take care of it. You're a way. Yeah. I believe that's tampering. You want to ever see?
You want to ever see?
I mean, you want to take care of it.
You're more than welcome to.
Packed channel.
I got a guy.
Since you try to clown me.
It was a key barrier.
What are the different reasons?
Broke as company, I ain't paid for my flight.
She's a cheap ass.
Curiosity.
Huh?
The reasons you were.
You came down here.
I felt like it.
Okay, good.
I might come back tomorrow. Good. Who
gonna side me? Who gonna check me? Brick. Probably the proud boys. Yeah. Proud boys. Mike. Great
Cody. Whoopie's all that. The Dominique's Foxworth show. You can catch it via podcast wherever it is.
Wait, no, no, no. That's the second time you've made it. You have two Dominiques on the show. Yeah.
We're both there. I made it Dominique's. You did it twice today. You have two Dominiques on the show? Yeah, we're both there. I made it Dominiques. You did it twice today.
Couple of Dominiques, cut it out.
Oh.
Dominique Fox with Dominique.
You and I might be real.
I mean, we're on YouTube too, so you can see us both.
Where do they get what it is that you're making?
I mean, it comes from heaven.
That's where they can get it.
It's a gift from God, you're welks.
I got a came from the window to the wall
to the sweat drips down my.
It comes from heaven.
That's where they can get it.
It's a gift from God, your welks.
I had a came from the window to the wall
to the sweat, drips down my.