The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz - Hour 2: What Ever Happened to the Plywood Casket?
Episode Date: April 23, 2024Greg Cote sleeps as though he's being buried in a tomb of some sort, and while he may not have his Back in My Day available due to show bylaws, he does want to get to his NFL Mock Draft ahead of Thurs...day Night's NFL Draft. Then, the Jokic brothers are a legitimate problem for the NBA, something's off with the Boston Bruins, and J.J. McCarthy is the biggest "huh?" out there in terms of pre-draft analysis. Plus, we finally get to some hockey talk with Mike but not before Greg walks back his Heat takes by saying they need "strategic dynamite." Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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This is the Don Leventor Show with the Stugats Podcast.
We were giggling during the break because of all the funny things in that Aaron Boone
video.
The fact that he was purposefully, purposefully going out of his way to be submitted humbled.
Okay, you said, no, no, not another word.
I will not say another word.
The camera's on him.
He's not gonna say another word.
But also, he does the move of checking his nails,
silently checking his nails.
Look, I'm not saying anything.
I cannot be incriminated and so
when he gets accused, he's like, wait a minute, I was showing you, I submitted. I was looking at my nails, there was nothing wrong with my nails.
And so it was all, yes, that's funny. Why can't we go back to the instant replay on
this? We use instant replay in so many instances in baseball
We have a clear go back to the nails
We could have used it right there
But I need to go back for a second because you guys didn't see what was happening during the break which was
It was majestic all I could say is it was majestic Greg Cody
I'm gonna do a reenactment here and Greg Cody is
Speaking into his phone a text that he is sending urgently,
okay? So he's talking to his phone like this to turn the voice into script and
this is what he said, we need me maximum t-shirts period exclamation point in
merch store put a rush on it period. That is correct. If you asked me to guess what Greg said,
I would have guessed that.
Me maximum, it was like hearing a military strike.
He rose up, because you guys heard how sedentary
he was in the first hour.
He couldn't wake up.
He didn't say things for 30 minutes,
but all of a sudden, dollar signs are in his head,
me maximum shirts, what do you mean?
I could put him in a merch store.
He sprung to life all of a sudden
i need to go back and ask you about the night you slept in the bathtub
because that's an uncomfortable night yeah uh... asleep in a bathtub no matter
how many blankets you put in there
well i think that's related to the maximum tv
the tv was not shot off and so I repaired into the bathroom
with pillow and blankets and everything.
And actually when you have the right kind of bedding,
the tub is not that bad.
You know, because I'm not a six foot five guy like Ron McGill.
For me the bathtub is a perfect little cocoon like place to sleep.
Plus you sleep crisscross applesauce
Wait what yeah sleeps on his back with with his legs crossed. Yeah. Yeah good for blood flow
Yes, yeah, so then I'm like five feet tall like a like a like a yogi
Wider tub than I would imagine now your standard tub
No, because when you're when
you're you're sleeping like that your knees aren't much wider than your hips
you know yeah he also rests his hands folded on his stomach like he was in a
coffin that's correct yeah good practice get ready every night you want to look
natural when your time comes so you sleep sleep as if embalmed?
You're like just getting everyone prepared.
One night you're gonna come here and this is how it'll look at the end.
Yeah, I'm gonna have my legs crossed in the coffin.
We're gonna have a misshapen coffin that's regular coffin size at the head
and then expands for my knees.
Probably expensive.
It'll be very... I've already priced them.
There's obese coffins.
Are there?
Yeah.
You can't put an obese person in a normal sized coffin.
The price of caskets is ridiculous.
How does it compare to the price of statues?
Where do we land on that one?
It's comparable.
Is it?
Oh yeah, yeah, it ain't free.
I'll tell you that.
Well how about this?
Billy talks to my dad like I talk to a six-year-old What if your coffin was your statue?
Two birds one stone, you know what I mean? That's a good idea. You mean an upright statue of a coffin
No, but you're inside your inside of it. Yeah, right
It's almost like like a pharaoh of sorts, right? Wow
You know what? That's not a bad idea. Mm-hmm. I could mummify myself
Dying ain't free
Exclamation point put it in the merch store
Put a rush on it
Exclamation point it's free to the dire, but it's not free to the family of the dire
Greg as we discussed before he's you know caring man
He doesn't want to put other people in a bad spot financially after he goes.
That's exactly right.
Greg, I have the answer for you.
Instead of the cask, instead of the statue,
we do it old school, tie you up in a nice bed sheet,
put you under an old oak tree.
And here lies Greg Cody, living underneath this oak tree.
I like it.
I'm in a bed sheet?
Yeah, in a bed sheet, but again,
you're gonna be on the ground.
Why do you like it?
What are we doing?
Dad's laying.
Living under an oak tree, it's incredible. What are we doing? I'm not sure about that one. I love a good nap
Tony go look what two minutes do we want to save the planet around here, right?
Tony to ask him get out of here just say whatever pops into your head those sit in a mausoleum over there in the penalty box
Dying should be free, right? It should be free. Yes should be. It should be free for everybody. Put it on the pole.
Dying ain't free. It sounds... is that yours or did you borrow it? Is it borrowed from some sort of rock classic?
Dying ain't free? I've never heard it said. It's poetry. Thank you.
Whatever happened to the plywood casket, you know, why do we need an
$8,000 casket? You don't know the difference. You're dead. Getting a plywood
casket, it'll dissolve before long.
Put it on the pole please.
The ground will eat it.
Put it on the pole please. Excuse me, Greg.
Whatever happened to the plywood casket at Levitage Show?
Why are you writing that one every day? whatever happened to the plywood casket at Levitard's show.
Why are you writing that one every day?
Because it's funny.
Yes or no?
Yes, it's a funny sentence.
It's apropos of nothing.
I was trying to head somewhere else.
You've been aggressively sort of,
you've been grabbing at things.
We're in his wheelhouse to death.
We've moved away from wood in general as a society,
haven't we?
The wooden outhouse is gone as well.
You're right.
Everything is polyurethane now.
Yeah, don't get me started on carbon fiber cement.
What would you guys prefer?
Because the show has gotten away from us today.
There are two things I want to get to,
because the hockey stuff is fantastic.
It really is.
And also, Greg Cody is dying to do his mock draft.
Because I don't know who the audience is for these mock draft, because I don't know who the audience is
for these mock drafts.
I don't understand it.
It will elude me for the rest of my life,
but he's been doing it forever.
And sometimes he gets five exactos
and it always beats Mel Kuiper,
and it's five of 32,
and it doesn't seem impressive to me,
but they all do it,
and you guys eat it all up.
And Greg spends a lot of time on this.
So which do you prefer?
The wonder and majesty of the NHL playoffs the best of snorted sports at the
highest realm or Greg Cody's mock draft? Is back in my day an option because it
is a Tuesday? No what happens is during the Heat Panthers playoff right at
draft week yeah there's like a bylaw that says you know because of that I
know oh Tony's got it going on
Are your legs crossed Tony?
Greg please don't watch the show while you're doing it. Okay. Yeah, please Greg. That's good Greg
That's not even on the screen Greg. Sorry now. It is a nice tree in the corner. Yeah, Greg
They're putting it for my perusal to us. See he's got his hands crossed like a dead man. Yeah
fingers locked Tony yeah and obviously the legs are flat when you
cross yeah your legs obviously yeah okay Greg go ahead and do me a favor show him
how it's done go in go in there now. Oh, but that takes mock draft. And take your mock draft from there. No, do it from there. Do it from there.
I would have to lay down to cross my legs properly.
You can't do it on a couch.
All right, let's do this.
Let's do this.
Maybe we move Tony and my dad goes sideways.
I want to do the segment where we get Greg Cody in what
will be his final repose, because he's saying,
this is how I want to be.
This is how I want to be buried.
He's announced it, right?
You're not fooling around. You're announcing to the audience, look, when it's over, just know the coffin is want to be buried. This is how he's announced it, right? You're not fooling around.
You're announcing to the audience,
like when it's over, just know the coffin
is gonna be plywood and it's gonna be,
it's gonna have some room in the hips
because I sleep crisscross applesauce.
Yes, correct.
I'm upset with myself, I forgot that bylaw.
Yeah, it came up last season as well.
It's a bylaw.
Am I to understand, Greg, that you,
for the first time ever, are going to reveal
one of your mock draft picks on the show today.
I've never done that.
This is the 33rd annual Greg Cody mock draft
in the Miami Herald.
I have never before preempted myself
by revealing an ironclad pick that you can bank.
It can't be one of the top picks, right?
It's gotta be.
You can bank it.
Bank it.
It's gotta be Caleb.
You gotta say it out of the corner of your mouth.
That kind of ruins it.
Yes, Degotts, thank you for doing that. That would be funny. Well, of course that is what it's gonna be. It's gonna be Caleb. You gotta say it out of the corner of your mouth that kind of ruins it. Yes, thank you
For doing that would be funny. Well, of course
It's a pick that not everyone would agree with all right, forgive me though
I do I do need to interrupt everything we're doing though because we have not gotten to this yet and it has been gurgling under
The surface for a year now Stu gotugatz. The Jokic brothers are a problem again.
There's a fight in the stands.
The Jokic brothers, it's been quiet for a year.
It was lovely.
We weren't talking about the brothers
being very dangerous human beings
who are not to be trifled with in the stands.
And now there is video of them in a fight.
Oh boy.
Ooh!
Yeah, they are professional fighters.
Hey, that guy took it.
He just moves on.
Maybe these guys are overrated tough.
Better than Haney. This is their home arena.
He's operating from a high point.
He's punching down.
Wait a minute. That guy was tiny and he didn't want any of that.
Why did that guy get hit like that?
Those Jokic brothers are menace.
Somebody's gotta rein them in.
Wow.
He ate that shot.
Somebody's gotta rein those Jokic brothers in.
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Listen to me NBA, you've got a Jokic Brothers problem. They're goons. They're goons NBA.
You've kept them under wraps for a year. You want those guys to go away? They're dangerous.
No, I want more of them everywhere I'm just warning everybody be careful they
don't care about what your societal rules are whatever however it is you
think is the way to behave in an arena is a way that will be adjusted by them
saying that you will do it this way me maximum that's Yocitz brothers yes they
are me maximum Yocitzkage brothers. Yes.
And they are not to be trifled with and they will run,
they will run through your crowd and your family section.
And I fear for you all. They're goons. Hey everybody.
It's Mike. And typically I record these Miller light spots in the studio,
but I requested that I specifically record this one from my home office because
I got a window and I'm looking outside at those beautiful fishtail palms knowing that in just a few seconds I'm
going to go out there.
I'm going to crack open a can of Miller Lite because while sitting outside by my fishtail
palms is usually a good time, I like to take it up a notch and make it a Miller time.
That's right, you crack that puppy open and you don't have to think about what you're
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A lot has changed over the years, including my backyard.
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Don LeBretard.
Quiet man.
Yes.
You know, I'm a married man.
I don't cheat on my wife despite that gratuitous line in back in my day.
Stugats. I wish you were here my
wife I really miss her. No I don't that's the thing about being married you know you're not
allowed to say I don't miss my wife I've been gone two days I haven't been gone long enough to
miss my wife I'm sorry I call her I'm on the phone with her for 30 seconds you know what am I hello all right all see ya. All right. And then, you know, I'm gonna see her in two days
I was jumping Charlie good. This is the done. LeBata show with the Stu gots
For as much as I dislike to got all things about the draft, I have been slightly confused
by all of the need for quarterback and need for value at the position. You have
to get one of these guys cheap and early. The JJ McCarthy thing where you go a
whole season hiding that guy and now you're telling me he's one of the best
and I'm like how are you doing that? So you're telling me Jim Harbaugh's getting a 15 and 0
tattoo because he took a high first round pick
and hid him all season?
I think with the people who do draft analysis and mock
drafts, Mel, Todd, Greg Cody, those people,
I think what they would tell you is they're not certain JJ
is that good, but enough teams need a quarterback
in the first round that he's going to go with the first round.
But need value is what you're telling me,
because what I, I, I, correct me if I'm wrong please, just
because I didn't watch college football like that. I just saw a lot of quarterbacks that
were better than this dude and a lot of quarterbacks who were trusted more by their coaches than
this dude was and now Jim Harbaugh says no he should go to the top and I'm like in what
world are you telling me that Michigan won the title last year because of a first round
quarterback? They did not. McCarthy's odds for going second overall keep lowering.
So he's improving his stock by taking on these team meetings and with these workouts that
he's having in which he's displaying that he can make every throw, but I'm also left
wondering aloud if he can make all the throws, why was Michigan's strategy such?
We just saw this.
This just happened with Zach Wilson.
He made one throw at the BYU Pro,
and everyone was like, oh my god, this guy is the guy.
And then he went second overall, and now he's on his second team,
and he looks like a flame out.
I don't know how you rank him ahead of Drake May and Jaden
Daniels, and I know that I'm setting myself up
to be freezing cold take,
but I've watched college football all year long
in seeing what those quarterbacks
were able to do this season
and holding up JJ McCarthy and how his offense used him.
I'm kind of perplexed by this.
And if Jim Harbaugh likes JJ McCarthy so much
because he is effusive in his praise,
like go ahead and trade Justin Herbert then and get a hole
because you got a lot of holes on that roster. Be about it.
But for the most part with quarterbacks, don't you feel like we're guessing? Like we're guessing.
No one thought Brock Hardy was going to be this?
This is what I would.
I feel like I'm guessing if all these evaluators are telling me that JJ McCarthy can make every
throw, then I very clearly don't know what I'm watching on Saturdays because it felt
like to me, just like it did with Dan that
They were kind of hiding him. There's four consensus first round
quarterbacks and McCarthy's the fourth and and then there's a big drop off to Pennex and bone
Nick and Pennex is better. They said Pennex is climbing right now. No, Pennex is better
Pennex is better than those other guys. Yeah, he was better in college, but we don't know how it's going to translate to the NFL.
He's got the injury concerns. Yeah.
He's got the injury concerns, which is probably what's being held against him there.
The thing that I was wondering about when it came to the quarterback, Stugatz, is I was pretty sure
after watching more ACC football than I would have liked to this year that we went into the
season with everyone saying, it's Caleb Williams and Drake May
won two, and now after seeing them play,
Drake May looked great to me.
I know at the end of the season,
they were less than effective,
but Drake May looked to me like a professional quarterback.
Nothing changed my mind watching that,
except that when I watch Pennix,
I'm like, that dude's better than that dude.
Yeah, I thought Drake May was probably
the second best quarterback from a next level evaluation deal but I'm not a talent evaluator. I did talk to
someone in the pros that did the deep dive on Jaden Daniels and he told me
that he was totally blown away by what this quarterback can do and he doesn't
know how anyone doesn't take him after Caleb Williams. Todd McShay told us on
God Bless Football that Jaden Daniels before the season started was like a
second, third, maybe even fourth round pick pick he played his way up to the number two or three pick in
the NFL draft but he was that good. Did he average ten yards a play last season like that's
against everybody? It was incredible. Yeah he was and then you would tune into to big
games hoping that he would make a similar impact I don't know like from
being in person Drake may had one of the best quarterback games I had ever seen
against the University of Miami in our program's history. Defense did what
they wanted to do entering that game and it didn't matter because Drake may chewed
them up. On the Michael Pennix injury front he wrote something in the players
Tribune talking about all the injuries talking about how there's other great
players that have gone through injury and had a great career. Last sentence of
his profile here, the truth is an EKG will tell you everything you need to know about me
Greg Cody, where are we with your mock draft? Who is that for?
I really do want please please educate me because I lose to the group right if I want to talk if if I want to
Talk about playoff
Hockey right you guys are wanna talk about playoff hockey,
you guys are gonna say no.
The draft is Thursday, Dan, I mean, come on.
Let's talk mock draft.
The draft is the biggest thing in America.
The draft is Thursday.
The light's upset.
I don't, I got a lot of hockey,
you got a lot of runway for hockey.
Do we?
We haven't talked about hockey.
We haven't talked about the draft at all!
It's on Thursday, it's just, I don't know,
hockey's position like soccer is on this show.
It's weird.
I tried to talk soccer this morning and I got so off that.
Good point Billy.
There's a superstar that has gone missing and also William Nylander can't make the line
up for the Leafs.
Mitch Mourner's avoiding contact.
That seems bad for hockey.
Maple Leafs fans are up in arms yet they're tied 1-1. We've got a game two down here in Hockey Town for an original seven franchise, and
we're not talking about it.
It's a weird series, Toronto and Boston. Like, both those teams, like, who do you think comes
out of that series? Because Boston has been good all year, but there's just something
off about them.
Well, yeah, what's off about them is that they switch goalies every game.
What kind of analysis is that? I've been locked in on the Bruins, Danny's right about them is that they switch goalies every game. What kind of analysis is that?
I've been locked in on the Bruins Danny's right
Right, they started out hot and now they've just there's just something off of them They have two great goalies, but it's just they have Marchman and they have they don't have Bertuzzi anymore
They have Marchman who's the other guy they have Mike?
Marshawn Marshawn
Marchman's on Dallas. They got the pasta man pastranac
You're right. I'm telling you there's something off with my is what they're doing is there's they're alternating
I mean they lost two straight headed into the playoffs. They haven't been the same teams at the all-star break
Yeah, go ahead. Just mock Dan. What do you want to add to it? Let's stay right here
They're married to a strategy over in Boston where they switched the goalies no matter what weird Jim Montgomery didn't do this
Despite doing it throughout the regular season last year
He changed up his ways and he lost in the first round to the Florida Panthers
So he said no matter what I'm sticking with this even if the goalie does have a good game
We're flip-flopping them for the very next game, and I don't think the playoffs are the time for that
Oh, this is the rare if you have to they actually do have to they have two great
Yeah, but you don't have one no, but this is the rare one you have two. They actually do have two goalies. They have two great goalies. Yeah, but you don't have one. No, but this is the rare one where they just have two.
Yeah.
You gotta go with the hot mitt.
Yes.
Is it time to start questioning Jim Montgomery?
It is.
Here's what you do.
You play one goalie until he loses.
He loses, you play the other goalie.
You play him until he loses.
That doesn't seem that hard.
I fix you.
That's playoff hockey.
I fix you, Boston.
Where is William Nylander? That's what I want to know what is happening who is William?
Who is the audience for your mock draft Greg Cody?
NFL fans are you kidding me? It's the most anticipated
Single thing in the Miami Herald every year and the month draft. Wow, is that true? Yeah
It's for red-blooded Americans Dan. Oh, that's right Dan. That's exactly right
No, it's it's I'm looking forward to doing it. I think I may do a live mock draft
Analysis wow a night excellent. Where are you gonna do that?
From my home nice
Football you mean I don't think he means like audio like you're gonna just like be blogging
Yeah, I'm gonna I'm gonna do a pick-by-pick
Grade of my mock draft, you know if you were to do this in real time Greg there be you doing it
Just we're doing a watch along you're welcome to join us
Pick I could throw it to you for now. They're doing a watch along you should participate by
Televising whatever nonsense. I think Mike Ryan should televise his group chat
on the NHL.
I think that that should go be scrolling
right down our screen right now is what should be happening.
Just put my phone up on the screen.
Yes.
It's kind of a good idea.
I think it's a good idea.
Group chats are a bad idea.
Group chats are a very bad idea.
There's always the one.
Yeah, you remember what Neil Brendan said
in his most recent special about friends and texting.
I do, but for those who don't well if
You know you have a good friend if your texts ever become publicly exposed you get fired
Well harsh
Greg how many exactos for you last year five really? Yeah, what's the record? What's the record?
That's about the norm in the past seven years? I've had 40 total
You're not counting
Some good years all of its asinine
How bad a success rate that is to get five exact that's actually good
That's really good. Mel says the same thing Mel says you want to get 25 30 32 pigs and five exactos. That's actually good. No, no, that's really good. Mel says the same thing. Mel says you want to get 25 of the 30 32 picks
and five exactos.
Yep.
I understand that's why Greg Cody always
kicks Mel Kuyper's ass on this.
The reason he counts is the only thing that matters.
If I told Greg Cody, man, this would be a good list, Greg.
If I asked you the things you want from this business
before you go, the concession from Mel Kuyper that you're better at picking
exactos than Mel Kuyper over a 10-year run you'd put it highest place on your
resume yeah that it would rank up there but you use Mel's picks to research no
no I scan several yeah it's an aggregate, right?
All the other ones uses Mel fantasy pro uses him
Fantasy pros comm tracks mock results every year last year. They ranked
172 I had a hundred and thirty three composite points
I however whatever their methodology is and Kuiper had a hundred and thirty four so he has a big year this is a big year however the mock
drafts that I personally beat included Peter King Mike Florio Chris Sims Todd Several of known Armando
Again give me the list again Peter King Mike Florio Chris Sims Todd McShay Armando Salgaro
Just to name a few. Yeah, just ran took them all out random names
Yeah, I my mock draft was rated higher by fantasy pros. What about Orlando? I'll say Gary I don't think he was rated does he do a mock draft the big Oh
Does he do a month I don't know he's just asked he's early on the next year. Yeah
You know some people do mock drafts like three years in advance, which is ridiculous
in advance which is ridiculous. Can you imagine that? That's what's ridiculous. Kuyper's first mock for next year comes out day three. I don't think there's any
place in sports where I have a larger disconnect than here. I'm like wait so you
guys care whether Gregg gets four exactos? Yes we do. There's a trend in mock
drafts that is very
unsettling and i'm trying my hardest to hold up a shield against it and here's
what's happened in mock drafts now everybody does many many mock drafts
five point oh six point oh kiper does a half a dozen mock drafts cop outs cop outs
mhm greg cody does one mock draft that That's right. That's how you do it. What about that Kiper?
How about that? How about it? Me maximum. All of this is the perfect setup for you to give us your pick.
Did you give us the pick? Give us the pick. Okay. Alright, this is the, you know, this is gonna be one of my exactos.
14. This is one of them for sure? 13. Okay this is for sure an exact with the number seven pick the Tennessee Titans
This is a new and unimproved down. Let us show with the stugas gamble on by DraftKings
Don LeBattard you don't remember the idea. I was probably like that kind of thing
Something okay. No the home run call was that kind of swing that kind of thing
Stu gots oh it's a good call thank you and plus it doesn't matter who's hitting
it like you're not tailing it to a particular aim you know all that jazz
you know you don't gotta do that you know that kind of thing. This is the Don Lebatar Show with the Stugats.
Hey, I don't know how that worked out.
See, now you got to read my mock draft to find out who I meant.
You were teased by me.
Thank you.
I have no idea who it is now.
I'm very upset.
There you go.
Jolt! I was stunned by his pick that got drowned
So my draft will be in Thursday print and online Wednesday morning unless I can pedal fast and get it done by later today
Pedal yeah, yeah, you know speed it up. Yeah, people need it. I got a pedal. I'm busy
No, Greg. Are you a trade? are you a trade man in your mock draft?
Do you predict trades?
No, I do not. That's another trend I don't like.
Oh, this guy's trading here. This guy's trading here.
How do you guys know?
He's not a fortune teller.
I mean, it's common knowledge.
There's going to be a handful of trades,
probably starting with Arizona at number four.
So you are projecting one.
Here he goes.
No, what I do is...
Sounded like you just said it. I'm going to pick Arizona at number four. So you are projecting one. Here he goes. No, what I do is. Sound like you just said it.
I'm gonna pick Arizona at number four.
But in my one paragraph capsule,
I'm gonna mention this is likely to be where
all the trades begin. You're gonna hedge.
There was some buzz yesterday about the number three pick
potentially being traded.
It could happen New England.
Patriots are taking phone calls.
Yeah, without Belichick there, it's more of a wild card.
Trade for Justin Herbert.
Cause Kraft supposedly is getting really involved.
If Herbert gets traded, what you really gotta do
is you really gotta see what the Chargers are gonna do
at number three.
Cause if the Chargers are not three at number five.
Because if they don't take McCarthy, then you know
he's not worth it.
No, but if they don't, but if the quarterbacks
don't really know, it's all bluster. If they need a quarterback and don't take JJ then you know, he's not all he plummets out of the first round
I would say the Chargers draft a quarterback. They're gonna be the laughing stock of the entire not if they trade Herbert beforehand
Well, that's true, but I haven't heard any rumors about her. I don't know. Check on Minnesota. What's happening over there?
I don't know just asking. Okay. Well well that is not exactly getting in strong with your reporting I'm not reporting I don't know I'm just
asking whispers then it's whisper season I know but the Duke the Duke has to be a
little more aggressive than that. He's still working on the story. Wait wait wait wait just collecting
information. Developing story. No but I want want, look, Billy, the next move for you as the
Duke, the national and international top insider, is to have perhaps a little draft info that
others don't have because you're so well connected. I'm looking, I'm looking, I'm fishing.
Damn, we've got an entire show to fill on Thursday. Exactly right. It's early. Can't
give you all the goods now, I'm plotting out what Thursday's looking like, it's looking
like damn near four hours.
What?
It's a long draft.
Four billion.
Well, I mean, if we're going to,
from start of 8 p.m. until the 21st pick,
I was doing 10 minutes at a time,
it looks like the Dolphins are gonna be picking around 11.40
then we're gonna have to wrap up the show,
so it's gonna be a long night on Thursday.
The Dolphins may trade down,
they may not even pick in the first round.
Hold on, I need to trade again.
They better pick in the first round. If we're advertising this first big until dolphins. They better pick in the first round
I'm not staying here until 1230 at night for the dolphins to do nothing very good chance. They don't pick in the first
They better
So now what do I need to root for here Greg Cody is is now predicting that the Dolphins may be leaving the first round,
while Billy does a draft spectacular
that's gonna be hours long.
My hope is they trade up to seven
and we're outta here by 10.
Oh, that'd be great.
Billy wants to be the best.
Why seven?
Nine oh five.
We're outta here, see ya guys.
Billy, Billy, Billy wants to trade out for Caleb Williams,
five minutes, fart it out, run out the door.
Giving it a maximum effort.
Perfect world.
Yes, you don't want to do a four and six hour broadcast,
but since we're here, how about you advertise it
slightly more enthusiastically than that?
Well, you know, we're gonna be here hanging out,
maybe Greg will join us, maybe he won't all be here.
Tony will be here, Jude will be here, Jess will be here,
Stugats will be in Detroit-ish, kind of joining us live.
Lucy will be there up in Detroit,
she'll be checking in if we're allowed to,
still trying to figure out a situation.
Well, we haven't done anything like this.
You're doing it, you're leading a draft day spectacular.
Yes.
I am.
And how are you feeling about it?
I mean, it's still coming together.
Lots of moving parts.
Lots of things happening here.
So you're about to launch a space saucer into the sky,
Billy's, the Duke's imprint on draft night.
Well, I mean, I'm just gonna be reacting
to what's happening.
I don't wanna oversell it.
We should be talking shop, Dan.
Yeah, exactly.
That's what we're gonna be doing.
While we're in kiss makeup.
Well, that's something that has been discussed.
We were discussing, maybe we start out,
and one at a time maybe we go out
and we do the kiss makeup situation.
So we're trying to figure out exactly what's going on there.
Four hours is a long time.
It is a long time.
The draft leaves these wide open spaces.
10 minute windows, yeah, that we gotta fill.
That's what we're trying to figure out. And fingers crossed, Stugatz's connectivity in Detroit
works out because truth be told,
we're only doing this because Stugatz wanted
to cover the draft and then he's gonna be in Detroit
so I gotta kinda man the ship down here.
Well thank you for doing that.
I'm trying to make your dreams come true.
I'm excited for it.
From Detroit-ish.
I was just there.
Sports are just so great. Aren't they? I love sports. It's a great time. It's all happening, isn't it. From Detroit-ish. I was just there. Sports are just so great.
Aren't they?
I love sports.
Yeah, it's a great time.
It's all happening, isn't it?
It is all happening.
It's just all happening right now.
Mm-hmm.
You got football, you got NBA playoffs,
you got hockey playoffs, you got baseball doing its thing,
you even got important European fixtures in soccer.
It's just a lot of sports.
Baseball doing its thing.
You were a fan for a minute,
now it's baseball doing its thing.
I got baseball on the fourth TV.
I mean, I'm a fan of the Seattle Mariners.
We got the best whip in the league.
You know?
I'm up to like seven players whose name I know.
Whip in it!
It is a fun time, as evidenced by the fact
that the Miami Heat had played one playoff game,
and Mike Ryan lost his mind
in the first hour and everyone got to eat.
He was fairly reasonable, I think.
I was, I was, you kept needling me.
Like, okay, I understand that they've been a great franchise
and they've given me a lot to be happy with.
But it's dynamite time over here.
Yeah, well.
It was dynamite time before last year
and you just kept telling me, well, they made a funnels.
I'm like, okay, well, we still need one to change them to.
Not a compete one.
I mean, you ask these guys to have vision and not react to what it is they see there
They're showing vision. That's what they're doing. And by the way dynamite does not mean trade everybody. No, it means add a piece
No
That's not a piece of dynamite. That's a piece of dynamite.
Now you've brought shite. Now you've brought shite.
Controlled explosion.
That's asinine. You either say you're blind or what are you doing?
No, it's not.
It's a controlled explosion.
Okay.
Controlled explosion, exactly right.
It's a controlled explosion.
Ball in the jack.
Just a couple of sticks.
Dynamite does not go willy-nilly.
Dynamite, you gotta, first of all, you have to know how to use dynamite.
Yeah.
Okay?
When you blow up a building, you blow it up so that it falls straight down.
You don't blow it up so it explodes every which way and kills innocent people because
big chunks of bricks are flying all over the place.
Dynamite time doesn't have nuance in it.
Surprisingly nuanced.
It's his dynamite time.
I bet you all your dynamite knowledge comes from Looney Tunes and ACME.
That's not how dynamite actually works.
In the cartoon, Wile E. Coyote is blown up by dynamite. The smithereens.
And then the next scene he's perfectly fine again because the Acme dynamite is designed
to be strategic. To regenerate. Yeah, exactly. And that's the way dynamite is in real life.
Yeah. And so when I say they need to dynamite the heat, I don't mean blow off the whole
thing. No. I mean make strategic additions to what they've got going on.
Precision strikes.
Those are not the same things!
No, I'm with Dan on this.
It's either dynamite time or strategic things.
It makes no sense what he's saying.
I follow. I follow.
And I agree. I think you see the lay of the land, if the opportunities there to upgrade the roster as it presently stands
Right you do that, but if you're gonna whiff again, then you blow it up
Yeah, you can't go into next season with that's time to nuke it not dynamite
And I will say this and perhaps Mike perhaps Mike would agree with me
I don't think anybody is safe should be safe on this wrong
I 100% agree with you and I've always been a fan of your takes. If you have to trade Butler and Bam,
Oh, we're already there.
If the if.
I'm just saying if.
After one game.
No, no, I've been here.
After one game.
No, I'm sorry, excuse me, we've been here for four years.
For the love of God.
For the love of God.
I don't want to have any more Bam on a bio discussions.
Mike has been saying it.
I mean, yeah.
And come on.
After one game.
What, you think Jimmy's gonna bounce back next year?
Not one game. I have the heat winning tonight what about
tomorrow night do you really why do we have to wait till Wednesday for games
so why are there so many conflicts like there were conference finals games are
we're going heads up against one another down here in this market Jimmy's gonna
be healed by game four you have four televisions what do you care you care? You're watching a Mariners game on one of the teams.
There's still not enough time?
I couldn't even watch Monday Night Raw.
Becky Lynch won the World Heavyweight title.
Wow, spoiler alert about that.
Well, it's just a women's world title.
They don't say heavyweight because obviously.
Ha!
Ha ha ha.
We didn't even talk to you about your
WrestleMania excursion in the middle of that.
That's how you decide.
You decided to snort that before.
We talked about that on a Friday.
Right now I'd really like to talk about
how the Winnipeg Jets have the best defense in the league.
Still found a way to surrender six goals
against the Colorado Avalanche and still somehow won.
What a series that is going to be.
Do you think the Avalanche knot things up tonight?
Either way, I'll be there watching.
How about Canada having four teams alive?
Incredible.
That's pretty good.
Is this the year the street games?
How about all these Americans being the best players,
for the most part, outside of Edmonton?
That's progress.
You have the captain, best player on Vancouver,
American, awesome Matthews, Mexican-American.
Incredible stuff happening.
That's why Arizona needs a team.
You remember. I'm just saying. That warms the cockles of my heart. Yeah. Incredible stuff happening. That's why Arizona needs a team. Mm-hmm. You remember. I'm just saying. That warms the cockles of my heart. Yeah.
Evil cat. I hate Billy. How so? It's, I mean it's fair to ask this time of year. It's just you can hear it from a mile away. Is this the year that the streak ends?
Where Canada brings home Lord Stanley? 78 right? We haven't. It's been a while. We
haven't properly articulated what's going on with the Maple Leafs. we haven't been a while we haven't properly articulated what's going on with the maple leaves They haven't beaten the Bruins since when the
1950s in the playoffs they've gone
Six series losing to them and sometimes spectacular fashion. Jim Montgomery's doing his damnedest to make sure that streak ends
It's just two big franchises original seven franchises all the weight of the world on Toronto
And they have two superstars that have gone missing one of them legitimately
I thought it was the original six no no Florida's that's a common misconception
Seventh franchise annexed yeah, it's bits. It's 1992 93 the Canadians won the cup yeah all that history boy
I'm telling you you do got you do understand though when he says the history of Toronto and Boston hockey,
like from your grandparents.
Do you realize that when we talk about the allegiances
that Mike has as a Heat fan, do you
understand what those people in Toronto and Boston
feel about their hockey?
Like how they suffer this time of year
because it's so random, reckless, electric,
and in Toronto's case, they always lose.
Well, Dan, you're usually so good with words
and establishing a narrative.
Why don't you tell us?
I looked around the room here,
around what it is that we were doing,
watching Mike Ryan trying to talk hockey,
and I'm going through my head and i'm
saying this montgomery he has flip-flopped his goal is and i read this
morning all the content that was birthed as they lost this time to
dr
after
beating toronto all the time every time they played in the season and so the
coach comes under it with a fan base that goes back
to last year and says we were the best team in the history of the sport we were
gone in the first round so mike r Ryan's Panthers could enjoy the playoffs. They
have essentially a bad amount of bio conundrum in that they have one player
that frustrates them because he just goes missing in these moments and that's
Mitch Mourner. There's damning video of him avoiding contact trying to dump a
puck around a guy and just skating out of the picture and that's when the pucks
in his own zone and William Nylander who played the final game woke up, quote, tweaked something, but
his coach had criticized his effort prior to and there's a whole conspiracy saying that
the coach is just keeping Nylander out of the lineup.
Meanwhile, Tyler Bertuzzi and Max Domi are out there on the first line with us and Matthews.
God, what a time.
Hey everybody, it's Mike and typically I record these Miller Light spots in the studio but I
requested that I specifically record this one from my home office because I got a window and
I'm looking outside at those beautiful fishtail palms knowing that in just a few seconds I'm
gonna go out there I'm gonna crack open a can of Miller Light because while sitting outside by my
fishtail palms is usually a good time I like to take it up a notch and make it a Miller time.
That's right you crack that puppy open
and you don't have to think about what you're drinking
for a darn second.
A lot has changed over the years, including my backyard.
Lots of landscaping being done right now.
But the one thing that hasn't changed
is the undebatable quality of Miller Lite.
You don't have to choose what quality is the best.
Miller Lite has great taste and it's less filling.
Tastes like Miller time.
To get Miller Lite delivered right to your door, visit MillerLite.com slash Dan, or you
can find it pretty much anywhere that sells beer.
Celebrate responsibly Miller Brewing Company, Milwaukee, Wisconsin.
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