The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz - Local Hour: Hygiene Vigilantism
Episode Date: July 12, 2024Today's cast: David, Billy, Jeremy, JuJu, Lucy, and Tony. David is happy to be surrounded by friends, but he doesn't want any premature celebration with one more show to go. What's the weirdest thing ...you've had a teacher do in your classroom? Then, David takes the crew through the signs up in his house to make sure people follow the rules. Plus, Billy's feud with his neighbor, Paul Skenes no-hit bid and potential All-Star start, Lucy's dog-sitting adventures, the ESPYs, and Megan and Harry's fall from grace. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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I'm surrounded by my friends on a Friday.
Everyone bailed.
This is it. This is what happens after a week.
Friday comes.
I think Friday's the most important show
of the week, personally,
because people tend to not take it seriously.
People tend to be ready for Lover Boy.
They're working for the weekend.
I happen to think that people want...
I...
Are we...
Can we be serious here?
We're supposed to do a show, I got no one around me.
Everything's happening in my ear.
I have so many things I need to get to.
You know what, screw it Billy, I'm just starting.
I appreciate that you're here.
I got Tony and Juju and Billy and Lucy and Jeremy.
I'm thankful for the whole week we had.
And I don't love the fact that yesterday,
I got a text from Pablo and from Dominique
celebrating the week.
Very thankful about the week, appreciative of the week.
And my view was, that's like premature celebration.
It's like winning the third game of a series
and the whole day yesterday, we won for nothing, we swept.
No, no, we need to win today.
Well, they were done.
But that, but it doesn't matter that they're done
That's like saying the starting pitcher of game three wins to go up three nothing and that means you're done
You have to win for I have a question for you
How are you more comfortable doing a show because you do a show by yourself every day?
Do you like that or you liked kind of having the group do the show with you?
Well, this is you you are the group.
So I love, I love both.
I love doing, I just finished Nothing Personal.
So you guys, I don't, do you hear,
do you hear when I'm doing the show in the mornings?
Yeah.
So I do it from eight to 8.50 every morning
and then I finish and then we start here.
And I, it's such a big difference.
I love the sparring partners.
I love being called out because of course,
when you're doing nothing personal,
you're talking into the void,
except for Koka yelling in my ear,
you know, wrong, or you got that wrong, or did that wrong.
And people here on Dan's show have no problem,
including Dan, who is across the ocean,
who is making sure to get in my ear.
I'd be surprised if you didn't have him
particularly dialed in, worried about a Friday show
with just us here.
Do you feel a little bit as though that we can do anything
because Dan's gone, Pablo's gone, Dominique's gone?
Fridays always feel that way.
Yeah.
Why?
There's an energy to Friday
because we're not doing quite as many segments as we normally do for a full show.
Normally Dan and Stugots aren't here on Fridays so it's just sort of shipping container led or you're here or some other special guest, whether that's a mean.
And so it's kind of like substitute teacher energy. That's always kind of the vibe on Friday, in a good way though, because-
And my flight is always at 12.
Yeah, that's also true.
It just brings a fun, kind of frantic,
and interesting energy to it.
I don't know.
I don't know why substitute teachers get such a bad rap.
I was so mean.
It's a good rap.
What's the worst thing that you all did
to your substitute teachers?
Cause I happen to remember the worst thing
that I did to mine.
I don't have a worst thing that we did to a substitute teacher,
not surprisingly.
I was an amazing student.
I had a worst thing a teacher has done,
and it's lived in my brain forever.
And I will never forget the time that we were in school,
and we were taking a test.
And I went up to ask a question, and my teacher
was shaving her legs behind her desk.
No way.
Yep.
Did she get fired?
No, she was so old, like she probably had like tenure.
She did not, she was really a mean lady.
She did not give one shit about anything
and Miss Spencer, that's a common last name,
so I can say it, just sat there
and shaved her legs behind the desk.
Is she alive still?
She was really old and this was like 15 years ago.
I had a middle school teacher that clipped her toenails
during class one time and it was one of the grossest things.
Like it really, it was truly,
and I forget what the name of the class was,
but it was essentially like,
was it health, oh it was critical thinking.
It was the critical thinking class
and that was not a critical thinking type of move.
I had a terrible fight with my girlfriend over this.
I do not agree with clipping anything other than
over a toilet or a garbage can.
It seems to me a very simple rule.
I don't understand why there'd ever be a violation
of that rule.
I agree with you actually.
Right, 100%.
But apparently, there are people who feel
they can clip away.
I once saw someone clipping at an airport.
Nah, this should be locked up.
If I were bigger, I have a top five list
in my head of things that I wish I could do
if I were a bigger person.
So wait a second, you're thinking of doing, like,
hygiene vigilantism?
Yes.
1,000%.
If you were bigger, though?
I'd have to be your size. So if you were my size you'd be the Batman of hygiene? There is not one chance I would allow someone to clip their toenails in an airport lounge.
Well what would you do just because you're bigger? You would cause problems? Or would you be physically menacing? Well I'd be menacing. I'm not very menacing. Just puff out your chest a little bit. 65, a buck 32, you're not menacing.
I can't go up to someone,
and I also view that I can't go up to someone smaller
than I because I don't have the menacing credibility.
So therefore I can't do anything.
Even if I were your size, Billy, I would do it.
And it's not just toenails.
I would do it, and there are certain times
that I still do it, but only when I'm with bigger people.
So I have the guts.
I have to have backup.
I have to have like bodyguards, bigger friends,
which is almost everybody,
but there are bigger people who just happen to be with me.
When people drop litter on the street,
what I don't do anymore because of all the violence
is I have gone up to cars
when people throw
stuff out of their car window if I catch them at a light I would I used to before
there was a risk of being shot I would say excuse me you dropped garbage on the
street but now I don't do it you would get out of your car and go it's a window
roll walk oh okay okay so you would pull up in the lane next to somebody.
Cause I'm envisioning you parked behind someone.
At a red light.
At a red light, getting out of your car,
walking up and knocking on the window
and saying, excuse me sir or madam,
you just dropped this Cheetos bag on the floor.
I have done that in a grocery store parking lot.
In a Publix parking lot, in a public's parking lot,
when someone left a cart in the way of a car
and it starts rolling and they ignore it,
I have had the guts.
Because I feel like even large people, maybe armed,
when they're protecting like milk and eggs,
they don't wanna delay getting back in the floor
to heat to the fridge.
So I have an ongoing feud that this person is unaware of
with someone that lives in my neighborhood.
And I think I know who this person is.
And there's a person, so when I walk my dogs
around the neighborhood, I will go
and I have the little baggies, right?
And that's not something that everybody does.
And that's not common in every area, right?
But like I have been conditioned with these dogs
because the apartment that I lived at before
had the dog bags and it was very,
not that I was just walking around
leaving dog crap everywhere anyways,
but since I've had my dogs, I've been conditioned
this is the right way to do,
this is the correct way to behave with a dog.
So there's a dog that always poops right near my mailbox.
So it's like there's grass by the mailbox,
the mailbox is by the curb,
and there's poop there regularly.
And if I don't look down, I'll step in the poop,
or if my mother-in-law comes over,
sometimes she'll park there,
and that's where she'll step, and there's poop there.
So I've come up with this plan,
and I haven't executed it yet,
and it's kind of along the lines of what you're thinking,
because I don't wanna get shot,
not high on my list of things that I wanna do,
but I want this to stop.
So I was thinking of maybe getting one of those
deer cam things and putting it in a tree
right facing the area where it is.
To catch the dog.
To catch the person, not the dog.
The dog doesn't know any better, right?
The dog's just doing what dogs do.
But I wanna catch the person,
and this is where I need help.
This is the next step that I have come up with
that I don't think is necessarily the best way
to handle this situation.
I wanna catch the person,
and then I wanna print a picture of me catching the person,
and I wanna post it on my mailbox,
and I wanna put on the paper, pick up your shit asshole.
But I feel like that's a little bit much,
and then that will lead to me getting shot.
And also, I'm then, they know where I live,
so then this could be a lot worse.
Like, when you do something confrontational,
I feel like one of the big keys
is people not knowing where you live.
Because if they know where you live,
then it's a lot worse.
I just don't agree that it's confrontational
when people are crapping on your property.
Well, I mean, I could use nicer words, obviously.
But no, I'm saying that that is something,
I think that that's a normal thing to say to a neighbor.
It's not like turning your music down at 7 p.m.
when you're having a small get together,
something that someone does every day.
Asking a dog not to crap on your lawn,
am I missing something?
Or is that not a very normal neighborly thing to do?
Look, I don't fault the dog, right?
If the dog's gonna go there, okay, but can you pick it up?
And like not just leave it there.
And I'm pretty sure I know exactly who this is,
but I don't wanna be confrontational.
Also the person's a little bit older,
so I don't wanna also be confrontational
in case I spook this person too much
and then I'm liable for something.
What about having your wife do it?
Oh, I mean, that's usually my go-to
for every confrontation I have,
is she will handle those situations.
So much so that I will say,
please don't have these confrontations
because this will make the situation
a lot worse than it needs to be.
Please don't confront that person.
Now if it's the way that my meal's cooked or something,
that's okay.
She'll be nice about it.
That's a private confrontation.
Yeah, no, but I also, I will eat the wrong meal
all the time.
Or if it's cooked the wrong way, all the time.
I will never send anything back.
I've never sent anything back.
Never, ever.
And we've talked about, I think, on Mystery Create before,
where I will take things to go that I didn't like
just because I feel the shame of leaving it behind.
And I don't wanna insult the person.
It could be a bad meal and I will ask for a to-go box
and then I'll take it with me home and throw it away at home
just so that they don't see it.
Or I do the old move, and again we're in reruns here,
but I'll do the old move where I pretend
that I forgot the box and it stays on the table.
Like whoopsie daisy, I meant to take this home,
it was so delish.
I know I'm playing Monday morning quarterback right here
but I feel like it was a risk for being shot
your whole life, picking up people's trash,
taking it to the window.
I don't know if it was the 60s or the 70s when you grew up
but Pistols was real out the whole time.
But Billy, I think you just put a sign on your mailbox
that says, do not crap on my lawn, you're on camera.
Yeah, there's people in my neighborhood that have that,
that say like, don't pee on my lawn or don't whatever.
Do they get peed on their lawn?
I walk faster past those houses, to be honest.
You should just put really passive aggressive signs up.
Yeah, but then my house also looks at your face.
I have signs all over my house, folks.
I admit it.
I do.
Inside my house.
I have two particular ones that are my favorite.
One is that I have a piece of art
that is relatively close to the top of a piece of furniture
and it's upon the entrance to the house
and people tend, for whatever reason,
which I'll never understand,
they walk into your house and they feel like
they can put their bag on the first ledge they see.
Not sure that that is proper.
You put it on the floor or you ask,
where may I put my bag?
So I have a sign that says,
please do not leave objects on this surface.
Because I don't want-
Like you're at a museum.
So it's that.
What kind of bags they be bringing to your house, bruh?
People bring purses or they bring beach bags
or whatever they're bringing.
I just don't want anything because there's a risk
if you grab the bag that you could stick a finger
through a piece of art.
But that's one.
The one that bothers me the most.
What kind of art is it that you can put your finger
through it?
Smithsonian?
Canvas.
Any oil on canvas, you can put a finger through.
Or like dent it.
Well, sometimes it can dent or put it through.
That's a peek into your life, that's how rich you are.
No, it's not.
I didn't say it was good art.
I just said it's any art.
David just likes protecting art, good art, bad art.
I protect art, but the other thing I protect
is electricity usage.
I like lights being turned off.
I don't like when people leave lights on
when they go outside or when they're a guest of your house.
Drives me crazy when guests go out to dinner
and leave the lights on in the guest room.
So I'm constantly reminding people with a sign,
please turn lights off when leaving the room.
Third.
So every switch has one?
What do you mean with a sign?
It's like next to all your lights
were just your signs?
No, no, upon the entrance to the room.
Are you like running a bed and breakfast
that you have like rules in the different rooms?
So I am a great host actually,
because when people come to my place,
I show them the refrigerator, the food,
do whatever you want.
The only rule is don't ask me for anything.
I don't wanna do anything.
I'm not cooking for you, I'm not getting you stuff.
You're allowed to touch and do whatever you want,
but just follow the simple rules.
The Wi-Fi password is a very easy one,
which I'm happy to give publicly.
It's keep it clean.
Very normal.
Like just, I'm not going to tell you, but just keep it.
No, yes.
Just keep it, keep the house clean.
And then the sign in the gym is my last one.
That's not a gym. I have a treadmill.
The people take a little fridge that I got on Amazon
for 40 bucks.
And have you ever had a fridge where you just close it, but then it People take a little fridge that I got on Amazon for 40 bucks, and have you ever had a fridge
where you just close it, but then it opens up a little bit
so it doesn't fully close?
Yeah, of course.
Like if you do it too hard or whatever.
And then all of a sudden your stuff isn't cold.
And I go down to work out and the drinks I want aren't cold
so I have a sign that says,
please make sure refrigerator door is closed.
Damn, bruh.
If I come to your house, I'll be mad as hell.
No, I think people have fun.
I've never had a complaint because what I've heard most
is people love understanding expectations.
What is expected of me as a guest of your home?
What is it I want to be a good guest?
Most people want to be a good guest
and they don't want to be put in a position
where they don't know what the host wants.
Are you someone who gets frustrated
if someone doesn't turn off a light
leaving a room momentarily?
So like for example, if I was staying in the guest room
but I had to walk out to go down to the living room
for some sort of reason, we're having a conversation
and I know I'm gonna be back in 10, 15 minutes.
No problem.
I'm talking when you're going out to dinner,
going out for the night.
Leaving for the night.
Or leaving for the day.
That's respectable.
What about when someone you know comes to your house
and brushed their teeth and they don't turn the water off,
why they brushed their teeth?
I don't either.
I don't either.
Oh well.
And that's too bad because I'm lucky enough
to have traveled around places where water
is not something that is taken,
it's not taken for granted.
And for whatever reason, I need to leave the water running
because I have a particular need to rinse the brush,
let's say every 15 strokes,
and I don't wanna have to keep turning it on or off.
What do these signs look like?
Like, did you print them on a printer?
Are they laminated?
Were they professionally made?
You can get them online.
There are, I searched direction signs for your house.
And they're this big.
Customizable.
They're customizable signs.
It may be called customizable signs.
Are they like a special font, special color?
I have different fonts for each of the different signs.
Why?
Because I believe, again, welcome to my brain,
I think people respond to block font
in a little more serious way than like Times font
or italicized font.
So I want-
Or like a little cursive.
I want a cursive.
Papyrus.
You may not know what that is.
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Don LeBretard.
Oh, I like firing people. so I take the opportunity to fire whenever
I possibly can because I can use it as a learning experience for them and try to
help them out and try to point out what they did wrong but in this case the
employee was enough levels below where I was that I did not do the firing but I
had it done within moments of discovery. I'm just like, I like firing people.
It's just absurd.
It's absurd.
Stugats.
I'm talking about people who I fire who deserve it,
who have done something that actively requires me
to fire them.
It is my unadulterated pleasure to do so.
This is the Don LeVatarard Show with the StuGards.
You know, speaking of pirates, Paul Skins,
11 Ks yesterday, holy good, bro.
I thought he was gonna slow down.
Did you think that he shouldn't have been taken
out of the game?
I mean, I think, let the boy cook it.
If you're gonna put him out there, you the pirates,
you're not going nowhere.
I think you should start ramping him down. I think they should, boy cook it. If you're gonna put him out there, you the pirates, you're not going nowhere. I think you should start ramping him down.
I think they should, I like it.
They're in the wild card race on the periphery,
but they're not going anywhere.
The thing is, the arm is in Tommy John race,
but peripherally.
I didn't have time to ask for the Derek Shelton video.
So I don't know if we have it.
Derek Shelton met the media, he's the manager of the pirates
and he gave the lamest BS excuse about why Skeens was out.
He said, oh, we had eyes on him, he looked tired.
It wasn't pitch count,
I don't know why anyone's saying pitch count.
Coincidence is it was 99 pitches.
We took him out because he was tired.
We've never seen it, but he looked tired to us.
He threw 120 or more pitches in three out of his four starts
during their run to the College World series. He's a horse. Like he's a guy who can
absolutely go over a hundred pitches and I understand pitch count. I understand
the way that we baby arms now. But Paul Skeens is is one of those guys
physically who seems to be built for the long haul and inevitably inevitably, like all of these guys who throw that hard,
there will be some sort of injury somewhere down the line.
But it's just so frustrating.
Like, the no-hitter or the perfect game as a concept,
the fact that baseball gets in its own way
in having these special moments, it's infuriating.
It made me angry.
I hate pitchers getting removed in the middle of no haters.
I remember, I mean, I hate Dave Roberts for that reason
because he does it all the time.
I hated Don Mattingly for doing it constantly.
It's not their decision.
No, I hate him anyways.
I just, I hate when you take out the pitcher.
I hate the people who make the decision.
Eh, who do I hate?
Or just take.
Do I hate you?
Was it you?
Did you do this?
We had strict pitch counts. Well, okay, let me ask you,
because you're in a unique position, right?
You have these strict pitch counts.
You wanna protect the asset, right?
But also, you have, you're preventing a moment
that you could market and capitalize off of.
So how do you weigh those options in your position?
It's a major problem.
And the problem is that as president of the team,
I wanted the no hitter.
Because I'm collecting ticket stubs,
I'm ready to sell the ticket stubs,
I'm having the players sign all the bases and balls,
we're taking all the game use balls.
You know when after every pitch
the catcher throws the ball away?
We're getting those, we're getting them authenticated,
we'll get the pitcher to sign them,
and we've got things that we can auction off on MLB.com
or put in our team store.
But the GM has already made the decision
and convinced the owner that if you let this guy go,
you're gonna have a problem.
And my view is that I wanna look at the game,
but the decisions are made before the game starts.
So like yesterday, Skeens was fine.
He looked great.
I had no issue with him at all.
He got through the seventh inning in,
what was it, six pitches?
It's amazing that we don't seem to take
high stress innings into account.
That we, all the time you have to take that into account,
but now analytics does not worry about that.
Why?
Because stress in
ins are based on this, your eye and analytics says no we're not interested
in that. It's infuriating the way that we treat arms in Major League Baseball now
because if it's obvious. It ain't working. Right the more it's a structural issue that dates all the way
down to kids playing travel baseball but by babying arms all the way down to kids playing travel baseball.
But by babying arms all the way through,
you're only making this worse.
You're only making your injury epidemic worse because you baby these arms and
yet you tell your pitchers to hunt for velocity.
And so those are sort of counterproductive things when it comes to injuries.
And so you treat these guys like they're incapable
of going deep into games, but every pitcher
and every pitcher's pitch count is different
based off what their velocity is.
What their legs are, it's infuriating.
You know, the players never liked
when I talked about this stuff,
because I wasn't a player.
Tony, did you ever think that anyone could take care of your body better than you or know your body better than you?
I think it depends too
like if you're injured or oft injured that you have something that you're working back from like I've worked back from a knee injury where
I felt like oh did I have the step that I had prior to the surgery or whatever?
so for me that was always difficult because you always know your body, but I
think there's a differentiation when you have something that could get injured
or something that was already injured, right?
Like if you look at these guys' arms,
they're okay until they aren't.
Dave, you know more than anybody.
It's like that one pitch until forearm tightness,
elbow tightness, tricep tightness,
it can be one pitch away.
So when you look at guys that were built to look like
horses and throw nine innings, look at Strasburg.
Strasburg was a horse, he was coming out of San Diego State
I think or whatever, and he looked amazing.
And then all of a sudden his career derailed because
one thing after another after another.
And it's like, it's having a Lamborghini, a Ferrari,
or a super specialized car that you take one screw
a little loose and the entire car gonna get messed up.
Do you think the All-Star game was at play here?
No, he was gonna start the All-Star game either way.
So had he gone-
He just had to get through,
he had to get through the game,
my opinion, this hasn't been made public,
so I have no idea.
He'll probably start.
My opinion is that he had to get through the game healthy,
and he did get through the start healthy,
and then they will announce him as the starter.
They have to, it makes perfect sense. We all wanna watch him, and I assume they through the start healthy and then they will announce him as the starter. They have to, it makes perfect sense.
We all wanna watch him and I assume they make the lineup.
The manager of the all-star game said yesterday,
he's evaluating the manager of the Dimex.
I'm evaluating who's gonna start.
He's so full of it.
He has no say whatsoever, none.
It is all the commissioner's office
who decides who the starting pitcher is.
Oh, I'm gonna figure out what my lineup's gonna be.
No, no, you're not.
Pretend you're managing your actual team
where you also don't have a say in your lineup.
So red or black font on these signs?
It's blue background with white font for the one in the-
What color are your walls?
Bro, breaking news, bro.
We just found a picture of your damn living room.
Somebody sent a candid camera picture, bro. This room. Somebody sent a camera picture, bro.
This is crazy, man.
Come on, bro, you gotta take some of them down.
Do not watch.
Don't look outside, bro, we can't even peek out the window.
I'm the opposite of that.
I have every streaming service available
in every guest room, and every bathroom is full
of every condiment you could ever need.
From combs.
Are you eating in your bathroom?
Condiment.
What's the word for, I have Advil, Tylenol,
tampons, dental floss, combs, toothbrush, toothpaste.
I think we call that accoutrement.
Accoutrement?
Is your house like an Airbnb when you're out there?
No, I do not allow strangers in the house.
Really?
Ever. There will never be an Airbnb. Can're out there? No, I do not allow strangers in the house. Really? Ever.
There will never be an Airbnb.
Can you, me?
Are you joking?
I don't know.
Wait, you put my stuff in a closet?
So your signs are blue?
What color are your walls?
White.
Seems like it stands out.
Toiletries?
Is that maybe the word I'm looking for?
Toiletries. Toiletries.
But I don't view Advil and Tylenol as toiletries.
Yeah, well that's different.
That's medicine, I guess. But I advil and Tylenol as toiletries. Yeah, well that's different. That's medicine I guess it's but I
Also have Gaviscon in every room. I know what Gaviscon is but my happy birthday Lucy's bet that praise God
My sister doesn't know what that means happy birthday to her. I don't care
Good luck
That's so mean. I care. I hate that sound.
I think Gaviscon's the guy that Belle was like,
was going after Belle in Beauty and the Beast.
Oh yeah!
Gaviscon is just a better tom.
Yeah, he wore the tie.
Nice.
Why don't you like your birthday?
Just don't.
Yeah.
Can you, was that,
did you not have good parties when you were nine?
I never really had birthday parties.
My birthday was in the middle of the summer,
so everyone was out of town.
My dad usually made us go to Des Moines for my birthday.
Nice.
No, not nice.
It was not the most fun birthday.
So I just, I've never really cared for it.
It's not anything like getting older.
I don't really care about that.
Just not a birthday gal.
Are you gonna be with your friends tonight?
I don't have any friends.
Are you gonna be with your coworkers tonight? No. Lucy, any friends. Are you gonna be with your coworkers tonight? No.
Lucy, I consider you a friend.
I think you are a great friend.
You came to Atlanta, me and you and Rose hung out,
and I feel like we made a bond.
We did, and we're matching sweatshirts.
You feel me?
Us being kind of new here,
and not necessarily Miamians.
We shared a couple of great conversations,
so I honor our friendship,
and I wish you nothing but the best, sis, every day.
Thank you, Juju, I love you.
But Jess is out of town, so I'm actually watching and I wish you nothing but the best, sis, every day. Thank you, Juju, I love you, but Jess is out of town,
so I'm actually watching Willow.
Wow.
So it's a Lucy and Willow day.
You are a good person.
I wouldn't watch someone's dog for a gazillion dollars.
As a matter of fact, there are two rules.
Since you're talking about other rules at the house,
I do have two other rules.
No kids, no pets.
No kids? Why the kids gotta catch a stray? I just don't want rules at the house. I do have two other rules. No kids, no pets.
No kids?
Why do kids gotta catch a stray?
I just don't want kids in the house.
Can your kids come over?
They're not kids.
Oh, it's funny.
You think kids could mean like 30 year olds.
No, I don't know.
No, I meant kids like-
You got swings up in the house?
What you got going on in there, man?
I just don't want kids around.
Kids touch stuff.
I don't want anyone touching stuff.
And kids make mess.
I also have a very bad habit.
My last one that I'll mention is I tend to vacuum
while people are still eating as a way to let them know
that they're dropping crumbs on the floor
and it's driving me crazy.
Well, why does anyone stay at your house?
Because we have fun.
I, do we?
We do, we really fun. Do we?
We do, we really do.
So I'm painting it as though it's not fun,
but it really is.
You have a pool in the back or what?
There is, there is.
Not allowed in it, but.
No, no, totally allowed.
Shower first.
How about after?
Shower after?
Generally, you're supposed to.
Doesn't everybody shower?
If you have a couple staying with you,
can they get intimate in your house?
They do, and it can be heard.
It can be heard?
Yes.
Wow.
So the way houses are built,
the walls are not necessarily thick.
I immediately regret this question.
Why?
Out of everything that happened this week,
they were gonna regret hearing some oohs and ahs,
given everything Lucy was not here for.
But did you, were you happy with the week?
I actually was moving this week,
so I did not have a chance to listen to the show.
So your girl's been packing and packing and packing.
Are you watching Willow in a new place?
No, I'm staying at Jess's place
and I'm watching Willow there.
Do you get to stay in her bedroom?
Yeah, if I want to.
Hey.
She has two beds, so I slept in one of the beds.
Like Ricky Ricardo and Lucy Ricardo?
Yeah, exactly.
So she has like two rooms, so I'm gonna switch it up
and sleep in a different room tonight
to figure out which room I like more.
Okay.
Little Goldilocks action.
Will it be based on air conditioning?
I don't know, it'll just be based on vibes.
Sounds, vibes?
Vibes, yeah.
Which room do I sleep better in?
Speaking of vibes, the ESPYs happened last night,
holy moly, Jalen Brown pulled up with Kaiser,
they was looking stunning.
Serena was a great host, she did a couple,
she threw a couple jabs at Drake, you know what I mean?
It was lovely, did y'all watch that?
I actually saw highlights and I saw some on social media
and I liked that Jalen Brown was asked, of course,
what would you ask Jalen Brown?
You'd ask, hey, are you despondent
that you're not on Team USA?
And he was much more focused on his date.
As he should be.
He said, I want you all to look at who I'm with,
not what I'm doing.
The SBs used to be.
They used to mean something.
I know this sounds old.
They used to mean something.
I woke up today and I found out the SBs were yesterday.
Couldn't believe it.
Also because the SBs historically have been
the day after the MLB All-Star game.
When there used to be no sports,
but now there are sports because of WNBA
and maybe MLS I assume may have games.
Yeah, but MLB had games yesterday.
WNBA had games yesterday.
There's winners not present.
It was bizarre.
Like, I don't understand why they did it.
And also, I mean, I don't know if everyone
experienced this the same way.
I had no idea the SPs were coming up.
And it could be maybe because I've switched
from like traditional cable to streaming,
where like now I will go and find it
as opposed to when I had cable,
I'd just have the TV on, it was on ESPN all the time.
And when we were there, obviously,
I was constantly hearing ESP week, ESP week,
the ESP's are coming up.
I had no idea the ESP's were coming up.
I found out on Twitter, and I didn't turn to it,
because I wasn't engaged in the ESP's the way I used to be,
and it's not an age, I don't wanna call myself old.
I used to think that winning an ESP was a thing.
I viewed it as Oscar's light.
Bro, just because y'all don't go to the beach
don't mean Cisco ain't out there
doing the thong song right now.
The ESPY still means a lot, brothers.
Like, you got two kids now, so your focus ain't there.
And you got a show to do this week,
so your focus is not there.
Brother, it's people that's been locked in on this ESPY.
People won great awards last night.
Were there any upsets?
I mean, I just liked the fact that
Caitlin was celebrated, Juju Watkins was celebrated.
It was just a night of celebration and fun.
And I don't get to see Serena
in those kind of atmospheres like that.
She showed her personality.
I loved it.
But that's the thing that's frustrating about it, right?
Is that they did it at a time
they can't actually be there to be celebrated.
Like they're celebrating them from afar
as opposed to kind of accommodating the athletes' generals.
Did they have Zoom acceptance speeches?
No, I think they were playing games.
They, yeah, so like Asia Wilson and Caitlin
both won awards and they just filmed a video
that they played, something, I wanted to watch it
simply because this was the only time
they were ever gonna talk about Iowa
at any major award show ever, so I said,
I am not gonna miss this moment.
But when I was trying to watch it,
it wasn't even on ESPN.
Like it was like some Home Run Derby preview show on ESPN,
which I didn't watch, I'm sorry, Billy.
And so it was only on ABC when I was trying to watch it.
Maybe that changed, but I was like,
why aren't the ESPs on ESPN?
This is why I realized, so they,
did they delay the start of the ESPYs
for the Biden press conference?
They did.
So the live show got delayed.
I started watching the Biden press conference at 6.30
when he was supposed to go on.
So when was it announced?
And he went on at 7.27.
And off at 8.26, what time did the ESPYs start?
I don't know.
Right after?
Like literally right then, yeah.
And it opened up with, I think Sierra did a musical number.
But, Katelyn did win.
So that was super, super cool for me.
Prince Harry won too.
Yeah, that was weird.
He won the Pat Tillman award.
That feels strange, right?
I think that they thought good ratings.
Get Meghan Markle and Prince Harry. I doubt it made any difference whatsoever.
We're past that point.
2021 though.
They have fallen like a meteor.
And they could have really, I think we were talking about this a little bit before the
show when we were discussing BSBs and Serena hosting and everything there.
The idea that the two of them sort of like took the money from Spotify and Netflix
and everybody after not embracing the royalty,
they could have remained popular by just leaving
the royal family and sort of staying out of the limelight
for a little while, but when they cashed in immediately,
it kind of like ruined the appeal
of what it was that they were doing.
I'm trying to think about anyone in my lifetime
who's fallen more out of grace than Harry and Meghan.
They were-
Antonio Brown.
Who'd get there?
Yeah, I mean, there's some examples.
Antonio Brown, though, was never,
I mean, it's the top five list, was he ever as high as as Harry and Megan?
Well, nobody I mean weren't and I don't I mean in terms of level
You have someone Lucy Bill Cosby Kevin Spacey
Kevin Spacey, there's no way he was as high Bill Cosby's an interesting one Will Smith slap heard around the world
But his cue.
And he's back.
And he's back.
He's back in a major way.
Because of Bad Boys 7 with Jimmy Butler.
Because he has spunk.
He has charisma, bro.
His son got it, his daughter got it, his wife got it.
Can't do number rise to the top of your crane.
I'm gonna say that Prince Harry is better known
than Will Smith or Bill Cosby around the world.
Maybe Justin
Timberlake might be on this list. No way. He's getting there. He was he was as
popular as any artist in the world for a stretch there and right now he is
certainly not beloved. I must be overvaluing. I have a very hard time with
fame and with players and with putting people at their right levels. Tom Sandoval, he was like dish
and then he cheated on Ariana with Raquel
and then that became a whole thing.
Even though it worked out for Ariana because-
Is that the Bravo thing?
Yeah it is, it's a joke.
No, but that's good, there's a whole-
It worked out great for Ariana,
if we're gonna be honest. I have a daughter
who works there, I get it.
Really?
Yes.
Wow.
But it's not, that's not even in the same,
that's like single A compared to Harry and Meghan.
Oh yes, obviously.
I'm not sure that there's, they're major league.
I don't think we've.
Chris Brown.
They didn't like fall from grace that much.
Like I don't think people act,
like I don't think people actively hate them
and they're not like bad people.
Like I don't.
It's just more irrelevant, right?
My thing is like, yeah, I don't think about them.
Ever.
Exactly.
Which is allegedly.
What were we talking about?
It's allegedly what they wanted
until no one thought about them
and then they wanted everyone to think about them.
And now they're at the ESPYs.
Yeah.
I really wanted to do a stat of the day, Billy.
Okay.
Can I do one?
Yeah, give me a second.
About Prince Harry or?
I do have a stat about Prince Harry,
but no, that's not the stat of the day. What's one yeah about Prince Harry or I do have a stat about Prince Harry, but no that's not the stat of the day
What's your step out Prince Harry?
His lack of relevance. That's not a stat though that it feels like a fact an opinion
Aren't all stats of the day opinions the reference
That's kind of the definition of stat that it has to to be real? Yeah, that it's not an opinion.
Yeah, stat, yeah.
Hold on.
I gotta acknowledge, Tony been showing me too much, bro.
There's a lot going on with you guys.
Don't bring me into this.
I'm breaking my dollars.
Tony, they got us.
Don't bring me into this.
What's happening?
They got us.
We don't need to do it, Billy.
The ESPYs was delayed for some crazy stuff.
I'll just say that.
That's all I'm gonna say.
It was some crazy stuff happening before the ESPYs last night.
I give Dan credit because what I'm looking at,
when you guys are doing what you're doing,
and when I sat there yesterday,
I couldn't feel more left out.
The two of you are laughing, you're talking to each other.
Meanwhile, Jeremy's talking, Lucy's talking.
Sometimes when Lucy's talking, I can't hear it
because she's talking to somebody, not me, don't know who.
Talking to Billy, I guess.
I'm reading your lips only, didn't even hear you say that.
Very long.
Get in there, Billy.
You gotta manage the dirt in.
There it is.
Start of the day, start of the day,
start of the day, start of the day,
start of the day, start of the day, Start of the day, start of the day.
And this is the start of the day.
Start of the day, start of the day.
And this is the start of the day.
Hey! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha season. The number of pitchers to have multiple starts in one season. No hits, 11 strikeouts.
Two. Nolan Ryan and Paul Skeens. He's amazing. A follow-up to that is that Randy Johnson and
Max Scherzer combined for two starts in their entire careers with no hits and 11 strikeouts,
and Paul Skeens has now done it two times in his first 11 starts.
And you're worried that he's not gonna start the All-Star game?
Oh, he'll start the All-Star.
He's more relevant than Harry right now, which shocks me.
Happy birthday, Lucy.
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Celebrate responsibly, Miller Brewing Company,
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