The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz - Local Hour: Substitute Teacher Mr. Elhassan
Episode Date: February 23, 2024Today's Cast: Amin, Jessica, Jeremy, Lucy, Mike, Roy, and Tony. Amin is in the driver's seat without Dan or Stugotz in-studio, and he wants to bring substitute teachers vibes. We kick things off with ...the sports story sweeping the nation: being able to see the **** and ***** of every player in MLB with their new see through pants. Then, Tim Anderson signs with the Miami Marlins, Jimmy Butler cares about basketball, Mike Ryan "apologizes" to Paul Pierce, and the Florida Panthers come up just short of a NHL record. Plus, Amin celebrates his voice influencing the future of NBA All-Star Weekend, and a Fox host has an interesting reason for why he believes black folks will vote for Donald Trump. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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You're listening to Giraffe Kings Network.
Remember when you were in school
and the teacher who was never out was out?
And you knew you had a sub coming in.
You didn't know which sub it was gonna be,
but you knew it was gonna be a sub.
And everyone had their fingers crossed
for old Mr. Alhassan.
Who's gonna put on a movie?
Why are you out of breath?
Who's gonna put on a movie?
Why are you out of breath?
I'm out of breath because, okay,
so I have a very tight schedule today.
I'm gonna do this show,
and I'm going to try to make it
to the airport in time to catch this flight.
So I had to have all my stuff down here.
I came downstairs earlier to do all the pre-show stuff,
you know, make sure.
But those that don't know, like you're staying
in the same space at the studio.
They don't need to know that.
They don't need to know.
You know, you had the ability to just go down the elevator
maybe a little bit earlier with your stuff.
Here's the problem.
The elevators today have been ridiculously delayed.
I'm talking about.
Well, it's Friday.
It's check-in day.
You're in a hotel in downtown.
Learn that lesson the hard way when I was trying to get coffee
a few weeks ago.
Six minutes for an elevator.
Six.
Yeah, that's a bit of a.
It's ridiculous.
Well, one of the elevators is being serviced right now.
So we have three as opposed to the normal four.
Four, yeah.
Four?
There are eight elevators. Yeah, I'm sorry. That's my point. right now so we have three as opposed to the normal four. Four? Seven.
Elevators.
Yeah, I'm sorry.
That's my point.
This is like six minutes for an elevator?
One of them is a service elevator.
Seven.
You're right.
Seven elevators.
Six then.
Six because one's being serviced.
There we go.
Okay, so six minutes.
So you're out of breath because he ran up, stairs to do something that you could have
done before the show?
Well no, I couldn't do it before the show.
Why? Because I was doing other things before the show.
Sleeping?
No, no, no.
I've been up to like 6.30.
Well, yeah, we all have.
No, I haven't.
I didn't accuse you of waking up five minutes ago.
I just said, you said, were you sleeping?
I said no.
You should have been like 6.25, packed your bag.
That wouldn't have worked.
This is all your design.
Like, you would, why didn't you just bring the stuff down when you came down for the
Meeting because I try to be on the time for the meeting. That's why
But wait, but you were on time you couldn't just bring your bags with you
It's a lot of shit. You'll see when you go outside right there. It's right like on the couch
It's just I just vomited everything there. It's definitely a two-trip situation
I like you guys want wanna go deep into this?
We can go deep into this.
No, I really...
A host runs in during the intro video.
We thought we had to kick off the show.
They didn't know.
Out of breath.
He was literally performing Stugatz's character
in the intro video.
It was method acting, actually.
Hey, me, the guy from...
Ass on.
Ass off, ass Off. Sorry.
Well, Ass On.
So the substitute teacher has ruled out the boxy television
is about to play stand and deliver.
Well first, the substitute teacher walked in
and then the crowd erupted in the classroom
because oh yes, it's the teacher of me, let's go.
It's Mr. O'Hassen who always puts on a movie, right?
And then asks you how you feel about it.
I say that to say, I know sometimes this show
tackles some very serious subjects, some very topics
that cut to the very fabric of society,
the intersection of race and politics and sports and business.
It ain't gonna be one of those days today.
Oh.
Oh, I think that there is an intersection
between sports and business,
and it's a San Diego Padres gooch.
Tell me more.
I've intrigued.
The Nike uniforms, the Nike slash fanatics uniforms,
the performance wear that no one...
I think we should blur this.
Yeah, hold on, put a logo on that.
We don't really know what that is to be honest.
Yeah, we do.
It's a cock and balls.
We knew this day would come.
There's a cup.
I think it's a cup half.
Did we know this day would come?
As soon as we saw...
Yes, I took a victory lap yesterday because we made a bet about this on Wednesday's show.
David Samson took under one ass crack, I believe.
Yeah, I believe it was a half ass crack. Half ass crack, I believe. Under one ass crack.
Half ass crack, thank you.
And we've already seen balls in a dong
and spring training has just started.
To be fair, I ain't seen ass crack.
Well, I think dong is more than half an ass crack.
I think that goes without saying.
No, no, no, I don't know about that.
I don't know about that transition,
that conversion skill right there.
So last week, Rob Manfred doubled down.
He Venmoed me a dollar, so it counts.
Rob Manfred doubled down and said,
these are performance where they tested really high,
they wore this during the All Star game.
I'm like, that's not a real beta test.
That's not a soft launch, the All Star uniform.
Someone really cares.
There are all sorts of kooky dark grays as opposed to the normal one
You can't get any representative data and no one cares about name plates on all star uniforms
So he doubles down on it even though fans everywhere have been complaining and I think accurate these these look bad
The name plates are smaller that they've moved the MLB logo to like the most real estate on the shoulder blades.
So now if you have a really long name, it looks extra bad.
It's just, it's not a good look.
And we saw photos of players tucking their jerseys in and we realized, oh shit, the pants,
they're translucent.
You can see through them.
You have a whole minor league system to test these things out with. I have it as Nike on its campus in Beaverton, Oregon, which is a great name
for a place, has a lab where they just have people who pretend to be athletes,
put on these clothes and then run and jump and do all sorts of things. Which is
doing a whole bunch of things that baseball players don't really actually
do all that much.
That's my other issue with all this is I get performance wear.
You want to be light and all that. No one had an issue with baseball uniforms.
Why do they need performance wear? They wear belts.
They wear belts. They don't need performance wear. They used to wear stirrups.
They don't need performance wear. About half to wear stirrups. They don't need performance wear.
About half the seasons played in like 40 degree weather.
They don't need tissue paper, soft, light uniforms.
It's baseball. They work as clothes.
No one ever had an issue with uniforms.
Why are you doing this?
So you know when they built the Brooklyn Bridge
and everyone was like, wow, this bridge is so scary it's gonna collapse and the guy the people that
built it were like we're gonna go across the bridge with elephants we're
gonna prove this bridge can contain the weight of these great magnificent
cities we're connecting Brooklyn and Manhattan. I think Rob Manfred himself
should have to prove that he could do a full exercise in these pants without
showing the world literally his ass. Or his elephant trunk.
Yeah, well, you could have gotten Julio Franco
to model these a little bit.
Not enough fabric.
But baseball players, as you know, they don't,
first off, baseball players, gross people,
just disgusting people all around, not very hygienic.
And that feels like a lot, Mike.
No, it's true.
Have you ever been in a dugout?
It's disgusting. I have, yeah, it's okay. Have you ever been in a dugout? It's disgusting. I have.
It's disgusting.
The backwood just do spit everywhere.
They just spit everywhere and baseball clubhouses is a fairly gross place, but also if you ever
go through one you'll see a lot of ashtyks.
They wear jock straps.
And the second that you saw one photo of someone tucking in his jersey and you being able
to identify where the buttons are in his pants, you knew that'd be seeing some dong and dong you've seen and now major league baseball
Fanatics and Nike they have to admit that they're wrong here
They cannot continue with this because it's only gonna get worse. I'm sorry guys. We really need to blow this for the max
Audience for the YouTube audience. I I cannot stress enough. If you have children around, send them away.
But this is what?
This is graphic.
No, no, this is not graphic.
This is going to be opening day.
It's shaft, head, and testicles.
We don't know that.
What else could it be?
Yeah, we do.
It could be a cup.
It's shaped like a dick.
The cup on the bottom is a little bit more rounded,
okay, and the top part is a little bit bigger,
and the bottom's a little bit rounder. Stop showing it. When part is a little bit bigger and the bottom is a little bit rounder.
Stop showing it!
When you push back like that and you stretch out your hand,
he's like, this guy's doing, you know, something comes out.
You know what he looks like?
He looks like Ace Ventura, the first one at the end,
when they figured out that Finkel is Einhorn.
Yeah, but I couldn't see Ace Ventura's dick.
I see everything.
Oh, no, when Einhorn has the pants dropped
and then it was like, look, there's nothing.
And then Ace says, turn around and then we turn around.
That's exactly what we saw.
They're gonna have to recall this, right?
They can't go through.
I mean, I've been saying that.
David said it's no big deal.
No, here's the reality.
If I'm that guy, I'm personally offended too.
Here's the reality.
The reality is I walked in here today
and everyone was talking about, did you see the the dick prints
or whatever and I thought I said yes and then they showed me that picture like
that's not the one I saw there have been multiple multiple there's not just a
like one off so there's a lot of these out there I cannot see that baseball
wholesome Americana apple pie take my kids to the ball games,
Cracker Jackson, Seventh Inning Stretch and all that.
Also, I can see a man's dick.
I don't see those things towing together.
Can I just also add a question I've had
for the last 24 hours.
Are we 100% sure there's no photoshopping happening
in this or the picture of the balls?
Now we're into something here.
The Giants player.
That one can't be.
Maybe.
It was digitally enhanced.
I actually.
No, because that came from a guy's Instagram story
who works for the network who was just posting a picture
behind the scenes.
Wait a second.
But there wasn't any sort of darkening happening
to outline the balls.
Slow down, slow down, slow down, slow down.
You're telling me that someone who works for the network.
Who works for, I believe,
it was the San Francisco Giants regional network.
Okay, so I believe that's Bay Area NBC Sports.
Says, oh, you know what would be great piece of content?
This guy is stretching.
Not the stretching one, not the stretching one.
The one where there's a guy sitting,
holding the bat up for photo shoot.
The one with the balls.
And you could see his balls.
It was a two one count.
There you go, okay.
I actually miss the balls the first time.
I miss the balls the first time
because I thought everyone was reacting
because if you see in the gooch, there's a bit of moisture.
And I thought that, okay, we're gonna start seeing streaks too.
But that's not the photo I'm talking about, by the way.
We're once again putting the Padre bending over.
But I thought that people were reacting to a bit of moisture
that had pooled and you can also see that.
And that's going to be an issue too.
But then there were balls.
I just, here's the part I don't get.
It reminds me of remember when that person who worked
for the Celtics posted video of Jalen Brown not being able
to dribble his left hand.
And you just gotta think.
The Eastern Conference Finals?
No, it was at practice, that was the worst part.
It was like, this is after the shame
of the playoffs last year, during training camp.
They posted the video of it, and it was like,
yo, do you watch the news?
Have you been alive?
Why would you watch this and say,
ooh, people will like this.
This will be good for our guys.
Same thing here.
You took that picture.
You didn't look at it.
You just saw the guy's face in his mustache
and just said, you know what?
They're working hard in media day, I mean.
But there's another picture of a couple
of Cleveland Guardians talking to each other
where it's not just that the tucked in jersey
has the emblem going through it,
but if you look at this here, look at the sleeves.
These are two men wearing the same jersey
for the same team.
And yet the seam on the end of the sleeve
is entirely different.
This is triggering to me.
Now, maybe one of them is wearing an old jersey.
It's not that it's one is on the right side.
I don't know why.
One is on the left side.
One is the right arm, one is the left arm. Sometimes they try to be like no look at the right arm of the well for what it's worth
Look at the right arm of the player on the right side. I love how we don't know anybody's names
The number one sport showed America like this this baseball man here
It's for the best because we're protecting their privacy,
especially the other two photos.
I mean, it's Scott Barlow.
That's not Clevenger?
On the internet.
That's not Clevenger.
And I would not want to be on TV in these uniforms.
But I do want to see Mrs. Metton one.
Hey.
That's so inappropriate, Jimbo.
Get out of here.
Jesus Christ, this guy.
I think I got to do something,
and it's gonna cost them a lot of money to recall this.
I think they gotta have last year's uniforms
lying around somewhere.
This is really bad.
It's a bad look.
It's brought shame upon the sport,
and Rob Manfred tried to do,
well, anytime you introduce something new,
especially in this sport,
that what you're introducing that's new are dicks.
You're introducing full, and also if I'm that
San Diego Padre player that was bending down,
I might take issue with this.
This is a, this is invasion of my privacy.
Like, because that's not just an action shot, I don't think.
Someone's going for something there.
Is it a talk situation where it's like,
it's down and under, and when he squeezes,
it's like, look, I don't have anything, but you turn around and you've got a you got a situation
I think you're looking way too much into it. I just how can I not what I think that's what the MLB has wrought
Okay, well, let's move on. Let's say baseball ability. Let's move on off of dicks to a guy
Who was once known as the most fun man in baseball and lost it all. I thought you were gonna say we move on from one dick
to what a lot of people in baseball also have accused
of being a dick in Tim Anderson
because he's a bit of a polarizing player.
I loved him Anderson.
I get excited anytime the Marlins make a signing
and especially when it's a player that.
This was their signing.
The signing. And I've heard of this player. This guy
was once I mean paraded around as the future of the sport. He
was a big deal. He had joined us on our show. Dude. And the
Chicago White Sox said no more players on that show. That was
one of the great interviews. I mean like I always talk about
this show from the perspective of when I first started listening
to it,
which is after my first appearance, which is kind of weird.
But what I liked about our show was
you guys could make me care about something
I didn't care about, right?
By virtue of just it being fun.
So for instance, I'm not a huge boxing fan,
but we used to have Rosie Perez as our boxing analyst.
And she would come in and break everything down. I'm like, you know what? I'm gonna listen because I have Rosie Perez as our boxing analyst and she would come in and break everything down.
I'm like, you know what?
I'm gonna listen because I love Rosie Perez
and I love how passionate she is about boxing.
So baseball is one of those things where,
look at how it ever, and Tim Anderson,
some guy for the white socks,
I didn't even know if he was white or black.
Then I'm like, oh, he's a brother, okay.
And then he starts talking and I'm like,
August dude, it's fun.
What happened to you?
Crapping all over the sport.
Oh yeah. He's boring, he's talking and I'm like August dude, it's fun. What happened to you? Crapping all over the sport. Oh yeah.
It's boring.
Like he's talking about the sport the way that we did
and all the issues with it.
It was great.
And then something happened over the last few years.
He struggled, may have had some things going on
off the field, who knows.
But he had one very public incident on the field
where he got in a fight and he caught an L.
He got knocked out
And I think it's affected his salary this year Well, I don't know if there's any coming back from the L that he took that's that's that's my question
Can you come back from massive public embarrassment like as the cool guy not for anyone?
He was the cool guy. He's like baseball. This is boring or whatever like oh snap this guy's cool
He's not he's non-plussed by this thing that America holds so dear.
And then he gets knocked out.
And it's like, can you come back
and still be the cool guy after that?
I do think it's possible, particularly with the teammate
that he has now in Jazz Chism Junior.
Like these guys are gonna play off each other.
Jazz was talking about it at spring training this morning,
how excited he is to have Tim Anderson in their clubhouse.
And the thing with the Marlins that was part of what made them good last year is like their clubhouse
vibes are not that of the old Stodgy MLB clubhouse like Skip Schumacher is a young manager who played
in the game just a few years ago. He got to play with a lot of really fun young players. And so
Tim Anderson coming in and playing with Jazz Chisholm Jr. and the rest of this team
that just kinda wants to have fun and overachieve,
it'd be cool to see him return to form.
Jeremy, you are cool.
Look at that gorgeous name plate on this still image
that we have.
Oh, it's Jersey's way.
Everyone can see that name, Anderson.
Jeremy, I adore your insight as a baseball insider.
You cover the Marlins.
Show that picture again, please.
There's no way he can come back from that.
I mean, this is fair.
Look at it.
Look how close, this is literally in the movies
where they're screeching halt.
You're probably wondering how I ended up here.
Right there.
This is like, everything was great
up until that millisecond right there.
I could see daylight between the knuckle and his nose.
Jesus.
Can I interest you in a potential rematch?
Because I believe, and I have to look at the schedule here, but I believe Cleveland comes
to Miami.
They do.
Cleveland comes to Miami June 7th, 8th, and 9th.
So you will see the rematch between Jose Ramirez and Tim Anderson.
Great.
Yeah, I'll skip the NBA finals just to see.
Perfect. Well, the NBA finals will be here. So it'll be perfect for you to be able to just stick around.
Stand a cup final.
That's right, Jeremy. Jimmy Butler cares about basketball now.
Yeah, it's today. Yeah, that's what happens. It's the second half of the season.
His trainers are posting cryptic stuff on Instagram. He's posting stuff with all sorts
of crazy different hairstyles before he comes back inevitably looking the same. It's time that Jimmy Butler cares about basketball. He's posting stuff with all sorts of crazy, different hairstyles before he comes back
inevitably looking the same.
It's time that Jimmy Butler cares about basketball.
It's perfect.
I've caught a lot of flak and rightfully so.
I'm embarrassed with the who that is segment that we did
where there's a Rockets player that's averaging
over 20 points a game and I've never heard of him.
We had a Thursday Thunder in which all three players
I'd never heard of before.
It hit?
Thursday Thunder hit by the way.
Shout out to Gene Pottie.
Wow.
There you go.
So I think I know what's happening though with my passion for NBA basketball.
I think certainly when it comes to the regular season, I'm just taking the lead from my franchise.
My franchise does not care at all about the regular season and hasn't for about three
seasons now.
That's what you're embarrassed about from NBA related from this week.
I work in sports and also according to some publications, I'm the guy that
knows about sports, which is really unfair to Jeremy who works for like two of the franchise.
There's nothing else basketball related that happened this week, Mike,
perhaps yesterday that you're embarrassed about.
Didn't watch a sport yesterday.
What happened?
I was watching hockey.
I'm talking about your behavior yesterday.
Oh, with Paul?
Yes.
Yeah, all right.
I apologize.
He...
So sincere.
No, no, no.
I seriously do because I put people from all the smoke in a difficult position that is
a brand new partnership.
If someone else on our team did that, I would have came down on them.
You do not call Paul Pearson asshole.
You call him a douchebag.
He just keeps doubling and tripling down.
I don't understand.
I almost believed him for like,
You bought it?
Oh my God, you're like.
You really put like 10 seconds there.
He is a douchebag.
Asshole's on the line.
You can take exception to that
and you are right in doing so
and I apologize to you
I should not have used that language, but he's a douchebag. Yes, you believe that like I believed Lucy yesterday when Lucy
Pretended to have watched blue chips. I watched it in school
That was you were playing sub in that situation
They played blue chips and we had to write a paper on it
And how did it make you feel?
Guys don't be mean to Lucy. Iowa lost last night to India and we had to write a paper on it. And how did it make you feel? Ha ha ha ha ha ha.
Guys, don't be mean to lose the Iowa loss last night
to Indiana.
Oh yeah.
There was no need to bring that up.
Well, I mean we're gonna ignore it.
Trying to get some women's sports in the A block,
Lucy.
Not when Iowa loses, we can't.
This was her first game,
Caitlin Clark's first game since breaking the record,
correct?
Yes, I came in yesterday and I already told Jess,
I was like, I's gonna lose tonight.
She did, I did.
Why, why did you have that premonition?
Because Indiana lost to Illinois the game before,
Indiana's undefeated at home, Iowa had had one full week off
since breaking the record.
Everything was just like the perfect storm for Iowa
to lose this game and that's what happened.
Losses are important though, we will be back.
I'm not worried about it.
I'd love to see Indiana in the tournament
because we'll beat the crap out of them.
Hot take, too many Big Ten schools with the letter I.
So many.
So many.
Also, every Big Ten school, logo's a letter.
We need to switch that up.
Every single one, except for Iowa.
I was just gonna say what the Iowa's a Hawkeye.
Mike, I do think you need to apologize to Paul Pierce though.
Not a douchebag.
An underachiever, yeah.
Oh, that's good.
What are you doing?
One championship.
What are you doing?
With the big three.
What are you doing?
Underachiever.
Yo, you guys, man, look.
I put you in a tough spot yesterday.
And I apologize to you.
I'm not even talking about the all the smoke thing, which,
again, business-wise, what an awful intro.
Hello, welcome, guys.
Here's Mike Ryan.
Insane. Right? That's number one. Number two, Hello, welcome guys. Here's Mike Ryan. Insane.
Right, that's number one.
Number two though, you guys don't realize this.
I said this like five years ago
and you guys laughed it off.
This is your fun and games playground.
Oh, we're gonna make fun of this makeover.
I gotta go to these NBA settings
and have to explain your behavior all the time.
If I may.
Oh, is that, is that, did I put you in a top spot I mean having to
explain someone else's behavior to other people perhaps executives because
someone on our show said something bad I mean do you not remember your Spider-Man
jiff I've had to do so much explaining for you so I'm glad that the shoes on the
other foot well first of all I don't know what kind of voice
you're doing there.
Second.
Boo!
Boo!
Ha ha ha!
Super charged that, Roy.
Second of all, I stand.
I feel like Roy should apologize to you.
I apologize to you.
I apologize to the people I need to apologize to.
There it is.
So I stand by that, Jeff.
I guarantee it.
That's also ancient history too.
I forgot about that.
Who cares about that?
Was Backings even a thing back then?
Do we have the hockey show today?
Because I wasn't paying attention to any round ball
because I was trying to watch my Florida Panthers
make NHL history, tie NHL history
for consecutive road victories.
Did they?
No.
He fell short.
It was 0-0 with 18 seconds left
and Sebastian
Ajo went top-shell for Mrs. Muller keeps a peanut butter. And the Panthers come away
with zero points and the hated Carolina Hurricanes who were swept in the Eastern Conference
finals last year by the Florida Panthers, at least according to everyone except their
coach, end up ending this road-winning streak streak but the big headline from this game
and I'm sure Roy and David to work will get into it is the injury to Matthew Kachuk and
also Gustav Forsling.
Heard again?
Yeah, he took a hit actually got sandwiched.
He got hit up high in the area where he ended up getting injured last season and I don't
know what happened to Gustav Forsling.
He just disappeared so they're both hurt and now I'm wondering how it's going to affect the trade deadline in two weeks.
Well, the panthers going to do because I thought they were going to go into the
trade deadline and be impatient standing pat because they had good chemistry.
There was words about out there saying that Antel Lundell was probably
going to be dealt, but Lundell's actually been playing much better lately.
And Zito's move lately has been also to and some of these moves have hurt
But you I mean the Panthers around the deadline have made moves that have been benefiting them in the long term
But in the short term guys like Troceco and tippet
Frankie Vetrano they've gone on and had really brilliant careers outside of the Panthers
But the upper body injury to Matthew Kitchuck is a bad one, and one thing that popped up on my social media feed
yesterday was the Carolina Hurricanes broadcast.
Absolutely loving that Matthew Kachuk got hurt.
Tripp Tracy, he's been there for a very long time,
back since Hartford, so this is a surprise
that came out of his mouth to me.
Why we stand, Pat?
That is a good question.
As Roy said it, and I've been thinking about it,
like do we pat things down? Is there somebody I'm standing next to whose name stand Pat? That is a good question. As Roy said it, and I've been thinking about it, like, do we pat things down?
Is there somebody I'm standing next to whose name is Pat?
Pat Riley.
Pat Riley, Pat Lone.
I mean, it actually tracks with Pat Riley's recent approach
to talent acquisition.
You're just like, yo, man, what's your deal?
First of all, hold on.
My deal is I'm a victim of what this franchise has done to me.
A victim.
Both in raising the expectations,
maybe to an unreachable level.
And also I don't care about the regular season
because their star player doesn't care
about the regular season.
You rattled off eight million names
talking about the hockey,
including what I believe to be Barry Zito.
I did not know Barry Zito played for the Panthers, right?
But when you say Alperin Shagun is like, who's that you're shrugging? I'm putting what I believe to be Barry Zito. I did not know Barry Zito played for the Panthers, right?
But when you say Alperin Shingun is like,
who's that you're shrugging?
You're talking about not caring about the trade deadline,
about acquisitions, about standing pat.
You're talking about, you're talking disrespectfully,
I might add, about a Hall of Famer.
What's going on, Mike?
What's wrong with you and your relationship with basketball?
Beyond like, oh, my favorite team taught me how to
Not care maybe I'm reflecting what basketball's issue has been because it's not on an upward trajectory
This shit's going down like the ratings are up in sports everywhere
Except for the NBA he said that yesterday kind of privately and I was like I don't like that take the basketball's going down
basketball's ratings are also up on regional networks.
You're talking specifically about NBA regular season though,
not basketball as a whole,
because women's basketball is like skyrocketing.
I think that's an important correction on regional networks.
I did not know that.
I've seen headlines where it's understandable.
The Blazers are down like 60% otherwise.
But national broadcasts are way down
from where they've been a couple years ago.
That's deeply concerning, especially for a league
that's trying to get another big TV deal.
I would argue that if you're talking about
regular season basketball, the ratings that are more important
to check would be those regional networks
because that's individual fan bases watching their teams.
The local ones that went down are all the ones like...
That sold.
Portland was like, wonder what happened to them
was all, Brooklyn, what happened to them
from last year to this year?
It's all the teams that had a massive departure
of huge star names.
We talked about this.
I like that impression though.
Can you, I wonder what could have happened last night?
Is something happened?
Did something, I'm pretty sure it's 20 teams are up.
I'm pretty sure it's 20 teams are up by the way.
You woke out of a coma and wonders what happened
to teams that he used to watch.
And it's a nerd. That's it. The, the, the all star game,
they talked about the ratings went up,
but the massive thing that they left out was, oh yeah,
last year Steph Curry and Kevin Durant didn't play.
So it goes to thought that if you have star players available,
then you're also, I'm not going to gloss over the national ratings being down
because in all the other sports, regional sports networks,
ratings are up, but also nationally, they're also up.
This is deeply concerning for the NBA.
They've tried to address it in numerous ways.
That's why you have an IAST.
That's why you have Adam Silver trying to make punitive
measures for some of the post-season awards,
saying you have to play a certain level of games.
Like, I'm not, this is not a hot take.
Basketball is at a certain crossroads here,
where they have to find a way to change the momentum.
That's why Chris Brickley posted yesterday,
a picture of Jimmy Butler training,
and said, it's the time of the season
where we focus up and make history.
The Black Ops runs that Brickley does at the court in New York is better than any all star game is better
than anything that we've seen in the NBA regular season thus far.
That's the frustrating part is I've seen these guys play hard with no money on
the lines.
I don't tell me give me more money and I'll play hard because I've seen you do
it in much more dangerous conditions with people who aren't NBA players trying
to make a name for themselves.
It was like Quavo was out there. I'm like, wait a second.
Yeah, man.
Nice lefty jumper, by the way.
I wanna...let's take a break.
We come back. All-Star Cities.
Some changes are coming down the pipe, folks.
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Stugats!
Uh, how familiar were you at the time with Chewbacca?
Like how your upbringing had how much Chewbacca in it?
This is the Don Lebatar Show with the Stugats.
So I saw the Oklahoman had a news breaking news item that the NBA is gonna
try and change the rules to who can host an all-star game and it's based on
several factors including how many hotels you have how many direct non-stop
flights you have in your airport and how many international flights you have
coming into your airport. Yet Miami still won't get one. Well that's that's Miami's
fault. That's the boat show's fault. That's the boat show's fault.
That's the boat show.
Yeah, the boat show.
Is that why there's not ever going to be an all star?
Really?
It is.
Yeah, the international boat show is here
on the same weekend every year.
The all star game is here.
And it's like not only here, but it's also in four lot of
those like a thousand things going on.
So the infrastructure is already saturated from people
coming to the boat show.
It's international.
And they can never move that.
And they don't move it, I don't know.
Yeah, okay.
I actually didn't know that.
That's fascinating.
The boat show, people always ask me about like,
oh, what are the big things going on in Miami?
Like, I want to come visit you.
What should I avoid?
Like, what days?
And I'm like, do not come the weekend of the boat show.
It is art basil, the boat show, and ultra.
Do not come to Miami.
The traffic is absolutely nuts.
And they're like, what?
Can you imagine the traffic? If we had the all store game,
everybody in from the NBA and then also the boat show
and everybody that comes in for the boat show internationally
it'd be a disaster.
I mean, the 20 international flight thing
would have disqualified Indianapolis though, right?
I don't know about the hotels, but
absolutely.
First of all, it's a here, here the numbers.
And this is courtesy of the Oklahoma.
So the daily Oklahoma. You got courtesy of the Oklahoma, so the Daily Oklahoma.
You got, you need 7,250 hotel rooms
and a minimum of three five-star hotels.
Oh, nice of you to join us, Mike.
Said I'd be back in a minute, let me take a leak,
but you guys just wanna know.
Oh well, why didn't you leak earlier?
You're doing a thing, it's cute.
Well, no, why didn't you leak earlier?
You could've leaked five minutes earlier,
and then you would've been fine.
Celcius coursing through my bladder. I don't know man, You should have planned a little better. What kind of beverages you intake before showtime
And he's got a point
Also again, I'll start game a minimum of three five-star hotel
So India think is fine there with seven thousand plus hotel rooms number two a convention center of
with 7,000 plus hotel rooms. Number two, a convention center of 650,000 square feet
of exhibition space.
Again, thinking Deanna was gonna be like,
oh, we're good on that.
But that number three is a bitch.
75 nonstop domestic flights
and at least 20 international flights.
Goodbye, Indiana, goodbye, Oklahoma, goodbye, Milwaukee,
goodbye, Memphis, goodbye, to all of you.
Mwah, we love you. It was nice while it lasted.
This was years of a mean complaining.
Finally, you know how like sometimes you do stuff, you're like, no one's listening.
Who cares? But I just say it anyway. And then you realize, oh no, my words to cold,
my power is limitless.
I rejoiced and the number of people so upset crying
that their little po-dunk towns can't host
an all-star weekend anymore.
Oh.
Do you think you did this?
Also, by the way, I Googled Indianapolis Airport.
According to Google, only five international flights
to five countries.
So that would be the disqualifier.
Get up out of here, Indy.
And by the way, I have a plan.
I have a very nice plan that I've established,
the Amine Plan, which is, hey, these are the cities
that host All Stars.
LA, Phoenix, New Orleans, Houston, Atlanta,
Orlando, Miami, right?
And then, we always put the boat show.
The boat show is awfully convenient. Look, I'm just saying. The airs and so on it. Maybe one day put the wheel boat show. I look the boat show is awfully convenient
Look, I'm just saying here since I want it
Maybe one day the boat show moves just gonna throw that out there
But until then I'll leave Miami on that list and then we rotate then you get like a cold weather city every once in a while
And then that last year of the rotation we go international. We're going to Mexico City
Oh, how can we possibly have a boat show and an All Star Game madness?
I've got takes on Miami's reluctance to host
an All Star Game, and it goes back a ways,
and it's not exactly great.
It's not a good look for Miami.
They hosted in the 90s.
Yes, they did.
Probably a different ownership group.
It's very clear that this ownership group
does not want to do that. I think part of it is also their facility. The building isn't a
all-star caliber building. You know, when you look at mostly new buildings are getting or
newly renovated buildings are getting these games. And a Casayas Center is, you know,
getting a little long in the tooth if we're going to be fair and we're going to be frank about it.
But the reality is, you know how to make these small towns
care and feel loved and wanted?
Let's start moving the draft around.
Why is the draft in New York every year?
I agree with you.
This is such a good take.
This is something the NFL has done really well.
They've moved the draft and the NHL, yes.
They've moved the draft to smaller market places
that aren't going to get a Super Bowl.
Makes sense.
You're not gonna have a Super Bowl in a place
without a dome in February,
except MetLife, I guess, that one time,
which I don't think they're gonna ever do again.
And so they've had the draft in Kansas City,
and Cleveland, and all these other places,
and it really energizes the local fan base.
Pittsburgh is applying for it in 2026.
I will be there if it happens,
but I don't wanna go to a Super Bowl in Pittsburgh.
I don't wanna go to a Super Bowl in Cleveland. I to go to the Super Bowl in the towns that you just named,
because this is all coming from a selfish media member perspective, and I'm not afraid to say it.
That's not about selfish. It's not about selfish. Let me say this right now. If I was going to say,
hey, I want to introduce you to the world, you're a person, I want to introduce you to the world,
would I get you in the middle of the night with crust in your eye?
You didn't do your hair and you're wearing your pajamas?
No, you want to look your best.
You want to be at your best.
Like, this is who I am, world.
It's the same thing for these cities.
Like, I don't care how much you brush your hair.
February in Indiana is just going to be February in Indiana.
June in Indiana?
That's hot.
You hot?
Look at you, okay?
World likes you.
But the idea that people are fighting for the right to give the worst version of themselves to the world is
insane
It did hail a little bit during the Golic Foundation Golf Tournament in Indiana last June. That's a weather thing
That's different. It's near the lake El NiƱo
The the idea of
being at your worst
and being in full front public. That's like me in 2018 through 20 on this show.
That's like wearing those new MLB pants.
I'm trying to think of like what's the worst version,
it's probably me on American Ninja Warrior.
It's Miami during the boat show.
All right, I'm gonna circle back and I'm just gonna say it.
And I know I don't want to project this all on the air
since but I do think that.
The alarm's already going off, Chris.
Yeah, look.
I want this too.
I'm gonna have a talk.
I don't want you to say.
Just be careful.
Man.
I care about this.
This is a local government thing.
It is.
Look, we all know how the local government tackles things like Memorial Day weekend.
Spring break right now?
I want to say, can I say it?
Yeah, Roy, you go ahead and say what I've been alluding to on why Miami refuses to be an NBA All-Star City.
They don't want black people in the city to do an NBA All-Star game. That's it.
They don't want a seminal event that a bunch of black people come into town.
Look at what they have that weekend.
It's the antithesis of it.
They've been doing this playbook, oh, Memorial Day weekend,
let's make it a tribute to the troops.
It's so transparent as to why Miami doesn't have all-star games,
and it's embarrassing.
But the Super Bowl attracts a large multicultural population
as well.
Yeah, multicultural.
Yeah.
I mean, it attracts corpse.
I'm sorry, is all-star weekend just for black people?
That it doesn't matter what it's actually for.
It's what they think.
It's what they think.
Wow.
That's incredible.
Yeah, kind of like buying shoes
from a particular individual.
Wow. You want to get into that one?. Yeah, kind of like buying shoes from a particular individual. Wow, wanna get into that one?
Hold on, man.
Okay, so if you don't know, do we have this video, by the way,
of this analyst on Fox News talking about
how the new Trump sneakers are going to attract
a certain segment of the population to vote for Trump?
Here's a video, take a listen.
That is opponents crazy, because even the sneaker thing, I was on social media last
night, very interesting as you see black support eroding from Joe Biden. This is connecting
with black America because they love sneakers or into sneakers. They love the, you know,
this is a big deal, certainly in the inner city. So when you have Trump roll out his
sneaker line, they're like, wait a minute minute this is cool. He's reaching them on a level that
defies and is above politics. The culture always trumps politics and Trump
understands culture like no politician I've ever seen. Question for you on that
point though. Yeah. Will the people that are excited about the sneakers and
excited about Donald Trump will that translate into them going out and voting for Donald Trump. Will that translate into them going out
and voting for Donald Trump?
Anybody willing to put 400 bucks down
for a pair of sneakers?
Yeah, I think that's commitment and love.
I hope you're right.
It's something, it's affection on some level.
So Roy, you ready to go to the polls now?
Yeah, I'm ready to buy these chunk tailed us right now.
Yeah, exactly.
Can we get a still image of Norman Osborn
from Spider-Man the Animated Series again
talking about what the hell is going on on his head?
I didn't notice anything, Mike.
You didn't notice anything?
No, it looked real natural.
Normal tape, find a new slant.
Is that felt?
I think he has a felt piece on his head.
He looks like a pool table.
What is that?
It's like-
He needs a lit roller.
He's like, all right, what do you tell your barber?
He's like, give me, if Carlos Boozer
wanted Matthew Berry's hairstyle, I want that.
Oh, what are you doing there?
This has been one of the worst weeks for me
in dealing with you Mike
The number of people were near and dear to me that you've taken out
This is the Matthew Berry Carlos boozer Colabbo. We've all been begging for
What is going on there? Look at the sides of that man's head?
I mean TV people are so fascinating like Buster Bluth