The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz - Local Hour: The 2023 DLS Turk Off!
Episode Date: December 19, 2023It! Is! Time! The 2023 Dan Le Batard Show Turk Off is here as Greg Cote and Roy Bellamy compete for the best tasting turkey in the DLS family. Then, 🎶 His name is Puka, Puka Nacua, and his quarterb...ack is not named Tua 🎶, Lucy tells us about a hilarious new Iowa Offensive Coordinator candidate, and Billy needs a snot rocket as he's dressed in his F1 Bucket of Death punishment. Plus, we check in with Greg as he fries his turkey on a concrete ledge while barefoot in an enclosed garage next to live wires, Tommy Devito's agent cashes in, and John Oliver is "woke." Note from the writer: Hey. It's Jeremy. Nothing in my whole life has ever made me feel as anxious as watching Greg Cote do this. Nothing. Ever. Nothing. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Transcript
Discussion (0)
You're listening to Giraffe King's Network.
This is the Dunlabel Tarshall with the StugatSpotcast.
It is a good thing that Billy Gill is suffering the F1 punishment today because he is wearing an outfit that is flame retardant
And the reason I bring it up is because the last thing that Greg Cody just said to me before the microphones came on
And I'm a little worried about just today in general, but this in particular
Greg Cody just set out loud not 30 30 seconds before we started. Is anyone
up there minding the oil? He's got bubbling oil upstairs and on the 11th floor and Billy's
been worried that today's Turk off. It's a big day between Greg Cody. Greg Cody says he
makes the best turkey. Roy Bellamy says he makes the best turkey.
Roy Bellamy right now is standing over his oils and turkey,
but Greg Cody is here.
And there's no one on the 11th floor with Greg Cody's bucket of oil.
In an enclosed garage, which is somehow someone approved.
Inclosed, it's debatable.
I think there's a window somewhere in there.
Greg, when you left the 11th floor,
was anyone there tending to the oil?
I don't think so.
Okay.
Yeah, I set the oil on low.
Right.
So it's probably not boiling and bubbling yet,
but as soon as it does, as soon as it gets up to temp,
I want to drop my bird.
And I don't know exactly when that is,
because normally when I go through this process
and cook a Greg's deep fried cage in bird,
I'm babysitting it the entire time.
I'm watching the oil come up to temp,
I'm constantly watching the bird.
And so this is a little unusual doing it remotely.
I'm eight floors away from my oil right now,
and I'm feeling, you know, I'm feeling a little...
Is there anyone up there watching
what could be bubbling oil?
This seems irresponsible. There is a fire marshal on hand. So to like a real one or like I'm a racecar driver today.
There's a person that we're calling a fire marshal on hand. All right. We're calling it. It's Lewis.
Okay, so we don't have a fire marshal, but at least we have someone so someone is minding the oil
Yeah, you ask me that question you wandered away from the oil without knowing if it had a minder
I was told to be done. I do what I I'm told you know since when great. Do you have a back in my day today?
No because my
It's Turkoff. It's Turkoff day, you know contributed uh... brand new so yeti and i contributed a brand new
song
to the show i thought that was enough you know we haven't played that yet
i've heard about that song might can you get that song for me now please and
we will check in with royne a moment i saw he appears to be in one of the
lovely elser suites where he is responsibly minding his oil
uh... gregg kody we're gonna have to send Greg Cody up
to make sure everything's okay with his oil
and probably send a cameraman with him.
Roy doesn't have oil, just so you know.
Why do you keep referring to Roy's oil?
He's doing the classic oven roasted turkey.
Okay, my fault, I thought the Turk off was fried
turkeys against each other.
I'm sorry for not knowing.
Old versus oil versus oven.
Right Roy. Nice champ with you.
You threw it to Roy.
He's on the TV.
I thought he was listening.
Oven versus oil versus oh.
It's like that's a way to promote it. You know, the bait is all this time.
That's right. Thank you Billy
Roy, can you indeed hear us from that sweet in that room that Greg Cody was not supposed to throw it to because he is not a
Professional broadcaster all versus odd
Roy you guys I can hear you guys you guys are chopping right now coming in and out just like I chopped the the shallots for my turkey so you're coming in and in and out right
now so but we are halfway through the cooking process right now if you want I
can show you yeah let's see this back yeah before I based it hold on hold on hold on
hold on there needs to be a little hold on hold on there needs to be a little
okay there needs to be a little team yeah you don't want to go just straight
to the turk off you want to go just straight to the Turk off.
You want to slow it down, lubricate the surroundings.
Can you tell me Roy, how confident you are
that you're going to be able to defeat Greg Cody
in this Turk off?
Well, right now I am at 70% because I'm not using my normal
Turkey.
I'm using a store bought Turkey right now.
That was already Brian's.
So you're catching yourself? I'm not Brian's time and half. No, I'm using a store bought Turkey right now. That was already Brian. So you catch it yourself?
That's my Brian time and half.
No, I did not catch it myself.
No, I go to a natural butcher for my actual Turkey.
So fortunately, I wasn't able to do that.
And why not?
The recipe a little bit tweaked.
Because it was last minute.
You guys just dressed me into this turk off.
I'm sorry.
There's just been a lot of excuses.
I mean, you had weeks, like you had weeks,
I don't understand.
It makes giving was like five weeks ago.
You had weeks, we talked about this weeks ago,
like you could, you had, look, this is what I know
and I can say this without dilution.
We, you, what I will say without dilution is
since we first talked about the turk off,
to now you had plenty
of time to go to the butcher and get a turkey
no no no no no first of all i must have missed those meetings because i was
told about this
one week ago
that's why that sounds like a lot of time
not a lot of time to get a turkey and by the way all of this was an answer to the
question
i am a worker
i get you a turkey in a week.
70% right now.
Put it on the pole, please,
Judeoat Levitard show is one week
enough time to get a single
turkey.
He said that like a gacha.
He really did.
I am a single week.
Here's an impossible timeline.
A week.
It seems like one day would be plenty of time.
No, this is like the equivalent of the mission impossible movies.
When I think of how hard the degree of difficulty, this is the hardest thing we've ever asked Roy
to do.
Get a turkey within a week.
In Roy's defense, we don't know where the butcher is.
He coaches the nicks.
I can just imagine we're gonna need to find a turkey in a week.
I got a guy.
I want you guys to understand.
And it's gonna cost you.
I asked Roy the question how confident he was.
That's what we got as an answer.
Without ever getting an unconstitutional.
70% Dan.
70% was terrible.
It's a terrible answer.
Here's Greg's song.
I'm fading you down a week to get a turkey. His name is Cooper, good at running curls
But when his hammy got a tear, he saw Booga standing there
His blade diminished, also take over
Nuku are hopped into the car, McFae has maybe found a star
And then that staffer threw him 25 and 2
Oh, there's a brand new kid in town out of me why you think all of Booga
Booga, Booga, Booga, Booga, Booga
His quarterback is not new to us, Kenny is Booga
Booga, Booga, Booga, Booga
Man, let's see a session, it's the time of the cashin' yeah Booga
Don't need the dog
Don't need the dog
Toca
His quarterback is not even two-up
Yeah, Ryan's with Nacua
Yeah
What are you gonna do?
Toe Tapper Yeah, Yeti Blonua. What are you gonna do? Toe Tapper.
Yeah, Yeti Blank, by the way, a genius.
How long, how many takes that he had me do
to get that song just right?
Especially for you asking.
On BYU alone, I had to do it.
No, he's like, no, don't go BYU, or BYU, you know.
Is this.
But you were asking us as if we knew you were there.
You did it.
I know, he's a perfectionist. Thank you yet
for that. You are clearly not you are whatever the opposite of a perfect you're an imperfectionist. I am put it on the
pole. Please, Jude. You is Greg Cody an imperfectionist. Yes he is. Go ahead and get out of here. Take the camera person with you and get us a
shot of you and the boiling oil and how
confident are you that you're going to be able to defeat Roy in the first
annual Turk off well I heard a lot of excuses from my worthy challenger and I
don't play that I don't play that game I am a hundred percent confident made a
series of excuses before we went to Roy I've done this a million times the
bird I have about a 95% success rate
with Greg's deep fried cage and bird.
We're gonna jack it up to 96% right now.
Nice.
Are you gonna be barefoot when you do it?
Yeah, it's a tradition.
When I drop the oil, I will be.
Yes, just when I drop the oil.
Right.
Did you go to your butcher to get the turkey?
No, no.
No, I grew my own.
I raised it from a little tiny baby and I killed it.
Yeah, yeah, but mercifully with a hatchet.
Oh God!
Oh God come to Cuba!
Oh God, this quarterback is not named to us!
So you beheaded a turkey?
Yeah, mercifully.
I'm just kidding.
I bought it at an unnamed store.
It was done for him.
Who are gonna be the judges on the turk off?
Our bellies.
Everyone's bellies, are we voting?
We're gonna vote for whoever it is,
produce the best turkey.
I'm not confident in Roy right now.
I'm confident.
Well Roy's not confident in Roy right now.
The judging of this contest is gonna be pretty straightforward.
We didn't overthink that.
We're gonna watch two dudes turk off and then afterwards we're going
to taste it. Now there's only six of us here. There's a situation where it's three-three.
Like do we want to bring a seventh person? Who's our seventh taster if we're split after six?
We will figure that out as we go. I like to get it. This is the nightmare scenario that
we discussed a week ago. Hopefully it doesn't come to that christ there really is no plan b
uh... if there's a tie my dad threatened the will if i didn't vote for him by
the way i did nothing of the kind of the
what it was i thought of it he does that a lot doesn't he does any threatening
with uh... who you gonna give the inheritance to if not to christ
charity
uh... uh... uh... uh...
is she uh... is she uh... and exotic dance Chris. Charity? Is she an exotic dancer?
I don't.
Oh God.
This quarterback is not me.
Yeah.
Should I head up?
Yes, get out of here.
Chris Cody said his father looks cool today, which I've never heard anyone say of Greg
Cody before. You know what? It could be the team Valor calmly racehorse had I'm wearing,
which is by Steve Ardwyney and Lou from Cincinnati. So thank you to for sending me this
hat. Okay. New York, thank you for the acceptance speech.
Awesome. On your hand, on your Cuba, it's border back is not made to work.
So good.
It is because it's so bad.
It is, it is, it is our wheelhouse.
Can't believe no one's thought of that.
Our wheelhouse is, is, how do we, how do we, how do we,
We kept a 16 week heads up on this and I was so worried over the 16 weeks and someone would come up with this idea
But no lucky for us
Don't let a tart I miss crank windows too many unnecessary
Conveniences now cruise control. Please I've
got cruise control built in. It's called my right foot. It controls how fast the
car goes. No button for steering wheel lever needed. Power steering. There's
another one. Why don't I want to give my power to the car? The power that I once
had. The car is a ton of metal. I'm a damn college graduate. Stugats, Bluetooth, HD radios, satellite. I'll take A.M. please with Wolfman Jack
talking through the static and I'll crank the windows down so everybody can hear
I'm Greg Cody and that's what's up in my day. This is the Don't Liberty Show with with this two gods. Music
Lucy made Chris Cody laugh out loud before we started the show.
She walked in and by way of greeting.
She told all of us,
you're never gonna guess who's in line
to be the offensive coordinator at Iowa.
I believe that everything in my life has led me to this moment.
Going to the University of Iowa, now moving to Miami, and the front runner to be the
Iowa OC is Joe Philbin.
That's just good comedy.
You're screwing with me.
I don't believe that.
He looks like Iowa.
Oh my God.
I'm picturing now this audition room.
I know it's a head coaching job or offensive coordinator,. I'm picturing now this audition room. I know it's a head coaching job or offense
a coordinator, but I'm picturing like an LA style movie
audition room and it's just the saddest,
most boring offensive minds in football.
Just waiting outside of the room to meet Kirk Ferenc
and it's like to talk to him.
Joe's just like, good, this is my turn.
I don't know about the rest of you.
You made him more Southern country than I am. John Sk put a little rent a little ranch and that's some of that
in them though that time in northeastern that problem of rock well this is what i
think of when i think of joe philby and i think of when he was the offensive
coordinator of the packers easier to do when aron rogers in his prime is the
mvp
and i think of joe philbyn showing up and the team making fun of him because he showed
up on either, well, it must have been Thanksgiving, showed up, not Halloween, dressed as a pilgrim
and killed the part because he does, because he looks like that.
It was a motivational tactic to inspire his team to victory over the lions at the time.
I assume they won.
If you're doing that, you have to wear a giant belt buckle, correct?
Yeah. I assume they won. If you're doing that, you have to wear a giant belt buckle, correct?
Like he wore the hat and the shoes.
He looked a bit leprechaunny, as I recall, but also, yeah, but also tall enough to pass
for a pilgrim.
Yeah, like no Sforatu.
The Iowa offensive coordinator job has to be a good job, correct?
Because you cannot do worse than has been done.
I think it's a great job because I, with fans,
I think they're with me on this one.
I don't really want a great offensive coordinator.
I'm fine, just an okay one at this point.
Because okay, that's good enough.
I'll take it.
We're not getting Lincoln Riley.
I just want like 27 points a game.
Well, you're in luck because Joe Philbin is okay.
What kind of questions you think
Ference is asking, like, all right.
Well, you're going in there and you're trying
to impress a guy who doesn't want to get first down, right?
It's third and fourth, you know, 30.
Well, what's your offensive philosophy?
Three yards at a time.
Run the ball.
You're hired.
Fourth and inches.
It was my punter.
What do you think about punting on third down?
Yeah. Billy, how do you think about planning on third down?
Billy, how do you feel right now about both your F1 outfit?
That helmet was too heavy and tight for me.
I was supposed to do that one, and I had to trade it out
because the helmet doesn't fit.
And I could not do a show where I wouldn't be able to hear you guys
with a helmet that cannot fit.
How are you feeling both about that and our Turk off right now?
I feel terrible about this decision, but as know as someone who rules with an iron fist
I saw a punishment not being completed so I took it upon myself to do it today
Hmm. The helmet is very tight. It looks like your head's about to explode. It's horrible
I can't breathe very well. Had I known this I probably would have worn contact lenses instead of glasses
I can't hear anything. My nose is stuff so I can't breathe through my nose.
And also, as I told you guys last week, the universe was out to get me and I haven't made amends yet.
So my neck is still not in a good situation and I didn't think about the weight of the helmet and my neck.
So it's a bit of a struggle right now, but you know what? It's that December and
punishments have to be paid off. So I'll do them if I have to.
Have you thought about going visor down?
No, I actually can't breathe, if the visor down.
I did try that and I couldn't breathe
and I thought we're gonna die in a fire anyways,
let me not be a corpse when the fire is.
So you'll put it down right as the fire starts,
just as like this is how I wanna go.
No, and also this protects me from absolutely no fire.
Like I will be burned alive in this suit.
It's just plastic.
It will melt onto my face and probably make my body
in unrecognizable.
Maybe he should be the reporter out there with my dad.
Yeah, you should be the fire marshal.
That, who approved?
Who approved?
Coping a deep frying a turkey in an enclosed garage.
It enclosed this debateable.
It's not the thing.
Oh, go down the coo.
Go down the coo. This quarterback is not into us. Yeah. and close this debate it's not
To my knowledge this is a smoke-free building which two gods breaks every single break Yeah, again, I mean closed parking garage standing
He's smoking but there's supposed to be a smoke-free building
But we're going to deep fry a turkey in a garage filled with cars
You sound but we're going to deep fry a turkey in a garage filled with cars.
You sound sinasy because it's squeezing your face. I feel sinasy.
The helmet is squeezing your face and it's altering the way your voice sounds.
Also the acoustics from inside the helmet are making it known to the audio only audience
that you are clearly.
That is the visor going on.
Now the visor is down and the helmet is inside.
This is sound better or worse. It the visor's down and the helmet is inside. Does this sound better or worse?
It's worse, yeah.
It's worse but better.
Well, here's my fear also,
is that the earpiece situation I have set up hurts.
So I wanted to take off this helmet in the brakes,
but I don't think I'm gonna be able to get it back
on successfully.
It is very tight and I simply couldn't do that
because my face and my head are too big for that helmet.
And so thank you for ruling with an iron fist.
And thank you for your contributions to trying to make this show better.
I am also afraid that this Turkoff isn't going to go the way that it was planned.
Do you think we're going to have a payoff win at the end of the hour at the end of the
show?
I don't think Roy's Turkey is going to be done until 6 p.m.
Well, he started it around seven.
Right.
And I think it takes three hours.
So we're looking at like a 11 a.m.
Duntime for Roy and my dad's gonna drop his about an hour after that.
His will be ready.
Right.
Would you guys be kind enough to really, I'd like as a group here to have sort of a team
meeting.
Can you explain to me how in Roy's head somewhere a week is not a long enough time on notice for him to
be able to go get from a butcher, a turkey.
I mean, he's a busy guy.
He has kids.
He's got a family.
He's got the hockey show sometimes. It's border back is not made to us. I'd like to talk for a moment about what Van Ginkel did on Sunday, getting his nose broken
in the first quarter and just playing the remainder of the game.
I know we get used to in that sports, to God's.
I'm sure by this time your used to gnarled fingers of formal football players because they get their fingers caught
between helmets. That has to be a thing that happens fairly often and it seems
like that would be pretty awful. Like you hear all the time in huddles, guys just
help teammates popping their fingers back in. It makes me go, oh yeah, it's a normal
it's it's a normal thing in that sport to you do not leave the field and stay out
Because your bone or your finger is in the wrong direction dislocated
But I'm just asking all of you the practical effects of as Billy tries to do the show with a helmet on it is too tight
What do you imagine playing an NFL football game is like if you break your nose in the first quarter,
I can't imagine what it's like if you didn't break your nose.
I mean.
It's an excellent point by you.
You have to just breathe out your mouth the whole game now.
That's usually how it goes.
I mean, JJ Watt played with a broken nose
for three straight seasons at a Hall of Fame level.
I saw Ben Ginkels got some work to do.
Everyone here would take the show off
if they broke their nose.
I think you're selling a short.
You heard of death punishment?
Break a nose finish a show?
I don't want to compare myself to football player,
but right now I'm doing my job with a helmet on it
as stuff knows.
So I feel like it's fairly complicated.
You just one step away from Ben Ginckel.
Was your nose stuff before you put on the helmet
or is it squeezing your face so that it's stuff your nose?
Did you have some sinus issues walking in this morning
or are those all caused by the helmet?
So I wake up every morning with a stuffy nose
and I have a technique that I use that's kind of gross
and I'm also working on I think a proprietary fix
to this solution.
Loing your nose?
No, it's better than blowing your nose.
But it's kind of gross.
So if this is a judgment-free zone,
I'd like to share with you guys.
I'd like to get to it, but before we get to it,
I just want to tell you guys,
I don't know if this is the same thing.
I remember where I was.
Freddie Gonzalez was the third base coach
for the eerie sailors.
The first time I ever saw anyone blow their nose without an napkin by just putting a
finger on a single nostril and blowing snot out of one side.
Snot rocket.
Yeah.
It's the first time I had ever seen that.
Love doing that.
I was just a young man and I learned about life and discovery and wonder in eerie Pennsylvania
in the third baseball.
From Freddie Gonzalez.
Freddie Gonzalez.
Before he was, the illustrious Freddie Gonzalez,
he taught me what the snot rocket was.
You either have that in you or you don't,
because you don't want to be the guy.
It's like, oh, someone did that.
That looks cool.
And then you try it and then you end up
with it all over your face.
There are places though where it's appropriate.
And of course, a golf course, a baseball diamond, it's fine.
No one looks at you, you know, weird.
You can do it there.
Shower.
You do it on the sidewalk,
that's everything.
Shower definitely.
When you're sick and you have a cold
and you're in the shower,
it is just, I am clearing out right now.
Lucy, how do you feel in general about the snot rocket?
I love being a girl and not thinking about these things.
And then when you guys talk about them,
I'm kind of squeamish.
I don't like any sort of like,
when you talked about broken nose,
God, little light headed.
I don't like any of it. So. about broken nose got a little light headed I don't like any of it so
Girls don't have boogers. No, we don't Billy
Well, so do you want to know how I clear up my nose and again judgment freeze on even though Lucy is very clearly judging all of us at this moment
All right, so I get I get some toilet paper some TP right and I I was I thought about this because of a cutip in your ear.
So I'll get some toilet paper.
I'll kind of make it into like a little column
and then I kind of push it in and I spin it around,
give it like two or three quick spins,
like you used to do like in the COVID testing
around your nose and it grabs everything.
And you take it out, then you can rip off the tip
of it, throw it in the toilet or whatever.
Then you do another one of those with the bottom half of it, throw it in the toilet or whatever, then you do another one of those with the bottom out,
if it's spinning around the other side,
oh, clear as you'll ever breathe.
I think that's less gross than the Snot Rocket, isn't it?
The Snot Rocket is pretty disgusting.
I remember being taken aback,
you understand, I don't know if you know
Stu got's the first time you saw it,
but to arrive at Freddie Gonzales and discovery.
I don't, I'm sorry.
Okay, and to see just a stream of snot,
yes, come out of a man that, that's casually,
like with some real expertise.
I mean, he did it.
He did it with a part of everyday life for free.
I was with a Flurick.
If you're watching on Max or YouTube.
This is horrific.
You can see just how troubling this setup is for this.
We should not be doing this part.
No, that propane tank.
No, that scares me.
Everything that this is not a fox.
It's next to something that's fenced in.
Yeah, a larger propane tank.
At least he has his apron on.
I'm trying to think of something more horrifying
that I could put dangerously next to Greg Cody
than a can that says gas.
There's also five wires right behind them
in case they're like mesh.
The none of this is safe.
Here, Greg Cody, are you ready?
Are you ready up there?
Can you hear us?
Is he in position right now?
Tell us, get set up the scene.
Set up the scene.
Can you hear me?
Yes.
OK, we've had a calamity here.
I told you...
DCC knew I don't have to talk down Liberty or show with a stoo-gun.
Gamble on by Graf Keens.
Down Liberty!
That's how it's gonna end.
The mailing in the end of the retirement,
Chris Go get me this.
It's just an A, B, him coming out and hitting the one or two notes of that kind of thing and you know it
And then just giving us finger guns and leave it baby
You should listen to the great Cody show podcast because that's all we do for 55 minutes a week
It's just say catch phrases we even make songs about them
But and you know it is a song for crying out loud. That's great. Hopefully that's a
Sui nominee for best song.
And you know it baby and you know it.
Stugats.
And you know it baby and you know it.
And you know it baby and you know it.
And you know it baby and you know it.
This is the Don Lebertar Show with this two cats. It does not, none of this seems, this does not seem good. We sent Billy up there to check it.
We'll take care of it.
Oh boy.
It's a man.
This expert.
No, this is not, this is, no, this is not good.
It doesn't seem clean.
None of this.
Is that going on the floor?
Hold on, hold on.
Oh my God.
Guys, it's going to be cleaned by the cooking process.
Chris, how do you feel about your father here?
You're laughing, but you're also scared.
It is honestly a little terrifying.
I am confident because he's done this so many times,
but usually he has a kitchen,
but is the tank usually this close by?
I think that is ass.
I'm gonna tell you, he's carrying himself like an expert.
I have seen in this confident,
he's dusting season right now. You know what he's carrying himself like an expert. He is. Right now he's confident in the wall of time.
He's dusting season right?
You know what he's doing?
I mean, have faith.
This is live.
This can go wrong.
This, you guys are in agreement with me
that the propane tank, Lucy, you're the responsible one here.
Does it not seem like it's too close to the oil,
to the fire?
He's lifting it, oh my God, this is your bad right here.
Oh dear God.
Okay, we made it.
Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
Okay, I think we're good.
No mitz just foil on his hands.
Are we sure, wait, we should talk to him for this part.
He's about to drop it.
Yeah, can we get it?
Hold on, dad, Greg, pause.
Oh my God, Greg, Greg, Greg, Greg.
Oh, he's taking his shoes off. Yeah, he's got to take his shoes off. Oh my God, can we, can we, can we, on dad Greg? Oh, great. Greg, Greg, Greg. Oh, he's taking his shoes off.
He's got to take his shoes off.
Oh, my, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can we, can you hear us and do you have a microphone? Can you talk to us at the same time?
Oh, yes, there is John Reed, always professional.
Thank you, John Reed.
Hello, we can hear you.
Yes.
Greg, go ahead and give us the book.
I am not prepared.
The bird is ready.
Give us the play by play.
Go ahead.
Go ahead.
Now, dad, first let me just make sure you said before this
that the oil was too hot when you left it there by itself.
Are you sure the oil is not too hot now?
Because that could be a problem.
His headphones are okay.
Somebody help him.
Billy, get in there.
He's trying to turkey.
Billy, get in there and help him, please.
Because confidence is not a strength under the best of circumstances with Cody.
Billy, why don't you give us the
play by play and perhaps
interview him as he drops the
turkey into the fryer and
starts to compete with, of
course, his headset doesn't
work.
Headphones are breaking.
Yes.
Yes.
Okay.
Everything is.
All right.
Can I drop the bird?
The oil is not too hot.
Correct? We hope not. We hope not. Oil, look. I don't want to be this ugly. Billy, get away from here.
You have a helmet on, Billy.
I mean.
He also, I didn't tell you this, but it's on a tiny ledge, this, this turquoise here.
Oh, yes.
Put the microphone close to the bridge.
Nice and slow, Greg.
Cool.
Oh, oh.
Oh, oh. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh Billy's this close to this that's the biggest upset here that casuela looks like it's lived
That casuela has lived that has cooked some things there there have been a lot of deaths inside of that
Okay, we don't want the oil to go up much higher. I think we're gonna be fine. All right, the bird has dropped
A little
Is that okay, but we're good. We residual. Okay. Is that okay?
But we're good.
We're fine.
How long will that stay in there, Greg?
Uh, we are starting the clock right now.
It's going to take in the neighborhood of 35 minutes.
Okay, you sound windy.
35 minutes.
It went in at 9.32.
That he could give her a take time around his phone right now.
It's a fairly exact science.
So we're going to set it up.
Oh, it's giver take it's not exact.
We're going to set it at 30.
And then I'm going to look at it.
That kind of thing.
Yeah.
This Dan to paint a picture is styrofoam.
It's foam here that's very flammable right next to this bird.
Yeah, we don't worry about that.
Okay, thank you for all of your hard work.
He does sound winded.
I mean, yes, was that from bending over, Greg?
It's just movement.
Do you sound winded simply from bending over?
Yes or no?
I have ruined a pair of metal arc earphones.
Yeah, he broke headphone.
Did you see the ledge that it's on for some reason?
We're on a ledge right now. All right, good work. Excellent broad past you. At the end. Wait a
piece. Wait a piece. Wait a piece. I didn't answer my... What did you ask? I'm sorry. Never mind.
I'm not ready to go to Pablo Torrey yet. So he's gonna have to.
I'm not ready to be gone to yet.
Let's wait for a second before we get to Pablo.
He's riveted.
I want to read to you guys this report from Wesley Steinberg, who is a giants insider
who seems credible because his avatar is a picture of Bill Parcell.
I'm going to let you do this.
You think I'm being fooled by the internet?
Well, the previous report on Wesley Steinberg's timeline is that Sean McDermott was arrested
at the team facility for his comments on 9-11.
So, seems credible enough, it's got a blue check run with it.
This is one of the problems I have with some of the DeVito information is that some of
it seems like it is real and some of it seems like it is fake.
So this is not from Wesley Steinberg what I am telling you now, which is that DeVito's
agent is in a feud with a new Jersey pizzeria place
because evidently at the last minute, they doubled the appearance fee of Tommy DeVito,
the Giants quarterback.
Yes.
So, I mean, Tommy DeVito has become a major star.
And so this guy wants to cash in while he can.
And so we double the fee.
Big deal.
I mean, I guarantee you, doubling the fee,
there are also doubling the amount of people
that are coming out to see Tommy DeVito
at said pizza porn.
When did they agree to that fee though?
You can't just go back on it.
If it was set months ago, I mean, that's just, sorry Tommy.
But Stugots is okay with lying
and just filing it under bit.
We don't know all the details.
But your siding with a doubling of the fee fee when what the detail we do know is that
the p3 of fields ripped off by it.
There's a there is beef between there's pepperoni between these two sides.
There's a problem between the two sides.
Siding with strike while the irons hot.
That's what I'm talking about.
That's what I'm siding with because Tommy DeVito, this may be the best opportunity.
He has to cash in on his celebrity
right now because it could go away at any moment. So was agent doing what an agent does?
So what's that fake story you wanted to read?
And this is why it sounds believable when I'm stopping, when I'm jumping from one to the other,
that he recently told the team's social media manager to quit it with all the Italian.
I just wanna play football before storming out of a room.
It doesn't seem crazy.
I don't know whether it's true or not.
It's believable.
I got sent that in a group chat and I'm like,
wow, we could use this for the show.
Let me see if this person's real.
Blue check, okay, good start.
Nowhere in the bio, does it say parody account?
Because allegedly, that's how we were supposed
to distinguish fake accounts.
And then I did the last check which is let's just see how full this account is usually.
And the couple first tweets that I saw seemed reputable and then Sean McDermott was arrested
at the team facility like three tweets down.
So this is the future that we feared when the blue check policy changed. It is here that future is here now.
And since we are on max, obviously, this is just a silly sports thing that doesn't matter.
But John Oliver, Stu Gotts, who I believe, and I know a lot of people think that he's
too woke because of where we've divided.
But I don't think that John Oliver has moved
politically in his 15 years on camera.
He's always been about the same things, and most of what it is that he says or does on
Sundays is enriched by facts, like just clear and obvious facts, like he may be presenting
them in a way that obviously leans a certain way but what he's giving you again and again
is fact-based it's indisputable he's got a team of twenty writers who work all
week to produce a half hour show and they need weeks off because of how
strenuous those weeks are
to get someone in front of a camera to talk for thirty minutes straight and
do that correctly factually with the subject matter they're covering and he spent the 30 minutes taking
out Elon Musk and not surprisingly Elon Musk's response to that was John Oliver was funny
many years ago before he went full woke and is now humorless.
Woke is interesting as a word because it's gone from something that was used by black people.
Stay woke, stay alert to racism. And it's been co-opted to dismiss funny people. Elon Musk is
many things. Funny is not one of them. He's just simply not funny. I don't trust him to discern
who else is funny. It's not something that's in his repertoire. I've tried to follow some definitions
because people have been asked several times
to find woke and they just go woke mind virus.
But pretty much the description of woke
just means progressive.
And I think that oftentimes people give credence
to dismissing someone as woke
by just regurgitating that word.
It's progressive.
It doesn't have a negative connotation either.
It is woke by the way, but it's totally been co-opted. The way that fake news was co-opted by Trump early.
I love that show. I love last week tonight. I like watching Gilmars show as well. To me,
it's just an easy download that's digestible on things going on in the world that can mix comedy and difficult subject matter that doesn't
seem very funny.
But what Musk is doing with what is now ex, and he's getting mad that he has not been
able to get people to stop calling it Twitter, because everyone is still referring to it
as Twitter.
The idea that Elon Musk's do gots, who seems like an overgrown high schooler,
trying like Zuckerberg, all of them trying to be popular because they weren't at one
time, and now trying to purchase that popularity, him being taken down for 30 minutes fact-based
on Elon Musk, John Oliver taking him down, I would encourage everybody to watch what is there.
I know Elon Musk now a podcast about him and his history is top five in the United States,
just covering who it is Elon Musk is because he's got an extraordinary amount of power and people
don't totally know what he wishes to do with it. So I've been calling Mosque Foney in a fraud for years now on this show, but you're saying
and I did it without any facts behind me, I just threw it out there and we had some fun
with it.
You're saying that John Oliver has facts to back it up, huh?
On everything.
What a powerful feeling that must be.
Yes.
Yes.
To have a team of writers putting together the facts for you so that you can be properly
informed and nothing that you can be properly informed and
nothing that you say is assailable. All of it is vetted and loyered so that you also cannot
get sued. Yes, that would be wonderful. If I could work with people like that. Instead,
it's you and Cody on Tuesdays near a propane tank with a lot of flame.
But I was right about Musk, I mean. were you were there before you didn't need any facts
Can Greg Cody still hear me with his broken headphones? Is he still out there? Let's go to Greg Cody Cody your opinions on how it's going
What a year of minutes natural elements yes Greg Cody
Yes, how is it going up there? Give us an update, sir.
Our oil has come back.
This is now on an improved
unleavened art show with the Stugas.
Gamble on by Grafkins.