The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz - Postgame Show: That's Miami
Episode Date: July 26, 2023Miami and Louisville will start playing for the Schnellenberger Trophy starting this season. Only one question - why? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices...
Transcript
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You're listening to Giraffe King's Network.
As we've noted, as you could probably tell by today's show, there's not much to talk
about, other than soccer and you'll complain about that.
So I'm going to do something that is sure to not annoy the audience and talk about the
University of Miami's football team.
What could be possibly have to say about this team that has not already been said?
So if you're not familiar with restructuring earlier in today's show, Jess alluded to,
there's no more coastal poor one out.
There are no more divisions inside the ACC and the coastal was famous for its insane
parody and just bonkers
game finishes and all that.
Insane parody is the kindest way to describe it.
Insane mediocrity.
Insane lack of a superstar team in that side of the division.
No, it's not very good.
In Miami, it has had as an active role as you could possibly have in that mediocrity
over the course of
its existence. But it's a dawn of a new day. And because there's no more coastal, there
are no more coastal matchups. So there is within the ACC now, I believe three historical
rivals that you face off with annually. And then the rest of your conference schedule is built on a rotation of sorts.
So my Amy's rivals make sense for the most part. You have that FSU.
You have Boston College, which that's random. Is that normal?
I have that. Yeah. The Hill, Fluity. They were both in the big East.
For me personally, if I were making the rivals within the ACC, understanding
that Notre Dame isn't a part of it, I would certainly go FSU. I think North Carolina's
kind of become one. I was thinking North Carolina or like an NC state maybe.
I would go Virginia Tech because I was a more fierce rival within the Big East. I'd
go Florida State, Virginia Tech, and one of the great things that came out of the
coastal, despite my dislike for that program, the North Carolina football rivalry with
the University of Miami's football program with the whole whole thing, the U upside down.
There have been memorable games there that have matter.
I do.
I really dislike them.
I really dislike North Carolina, and I would have like to continue. Is that what you like?
I have to. You don't have to. Pablo. Don't do that Pablo. Pablo. Save it for when it's appropriate. You're taking all the power away by overusing it. Yeah.
So you have to bring it over your knee on the stage.
That's plus it's more a you not a diamond. You're kind of doing diamond dial stage. Oh yeah. It's kind of like open up that you take it. So Miami's rivals are Florida State,
Boston College and Louisville.
Louisville.
Louisville.
Which also a former Big East team,
that's good though, get that dub.
Couple of, a couple of memorable games in their history,
but it's a weird one.
It's a weird one.
Jeff Brown though this year.
It's an odd rivalry.
And when you think about these two programs, what is happening back there?
Just just said the coach for Louisville Cardinals and Chris goes, yeah, he has no idea.
He's like, they got Jeff Brahms this year.
I was like, yeah, I like gave her a thumbs up.
I know he's considered an upgrade.
I got Scott Satterfield.
Definitely many of you are great.
So everyone's trying to warm up to this being an annual historic rival because this conference
is telling Miami and Louisville they are rivals.
And you're struggling to find a reason to care.
Well, fear not.
Louisville athletic commission proposed mission proposed this idea. And Miami and Louisville will begin playing for a trophy
to kind of juice up this new rivalry
they're forcing down our throats.
They're gonna be playing for the Schnellenberger trophy.
Howard Schnellenberger coached at the University of Miami
famously, that's why the Ibus had the pipe
in its mouth and our logo.
We go back to that by the way.
We should, but the whole thing about tobacco
kind of killed that.
And that's, we'll revisit that in a second,
because if we're going to accept,
and we shouldn't, by the way,
it's absurd that there's a trophy
being played for by these two teams.
I disagree.
If, why?
It's a great trophy.
It's cowboy boots.
It is a great top five college football trophy. Why is, okay, you have to a great trophy. It's cowboy boots. What makes it great? It is a top five college football trophy.
Why is okay?
Instant.
You have to describe this trophy.
This trophy is a pair of bronzed cowboy boots on a plinth.
It is perfect.
And it says the Schnellenberger trophy,
University of Miami, 79 to 83,
which is like four years,
Louisville, 85 to 94.
And it's just a pair of cowboy boots
that I assume someone's going to try to put their feet
into at some point and get stuck inside the trophy.
It shouldn't be stuck to that.
What'd you call it a plinth?
A plinth, like a stand.
A plinth, a trophy stand.
I've never heard that word.
A trophy stand could just be here as a 37 year old man.
That's a crossfire.
I've heard that word.
A heavy base supporting a statue or vase. I'm not, there do. You used to introduce him to explain my rock. You you
vote. You expanded my vocabulary. It landed on me. The the boots. The boots are stuck to this
or at least for the time they are not made for walking. They should be made for walking because
we need to have the Charlie Strong moment where if coach Chris, ball wins, he has to shove his feet into this and you should be
forced to coach with them. However, I learned that coach, Alan burger war cowboy boots
through the introduction of this trophy. I also learned that this wasn't a part of his
lore. No, it is apparently part of his lore, but is it a part of his lore that people
knew? Now for me, when the part of his lore that works for Miami fans is the pipe.
I feel like lore has to be democratically decided. It's the pipe.
Schnellerberger is known for the pipe.
The pipe would be an amazing trophy.
Amazing. You have an oversized pipe and you can play.
People tend to smoke it. Yeah, pretend to smoke it, but they didn't want that.
You can't put a pipe on that thing just said before.
So the plum is.
It's a six letter word.
They they they aired.
I think especially the pipe that the old school pipe
that Howard Stalingberger used to own,
I think that is comedic value.
Yes, it's dangerous. I love an old pipe. But it's.
We know, Pablo.
Yeah.
It's pleasing.
It's pleasing.
It's not like they're playing for a cigarette.
That would be weird.
They're a bong.
Yeah.
I guess, a mask bong.
Yeah.
That's the other man.
That's what I think.
That's what I think.
It's whenever Washington and Colorado play.
They play for that.
But if you're going to go,
if you're going to go to Shnellenberger,
you can't go for an article clothing or is on song. I'm going to go to the
I'm going to go to the I'm going to go to the I'm going to go to the I'm going to go to the I'm going to go But if you're going to go, if you're going to go to Shnellenberger, you can't go for an
article of clothing or is ensemble that no one was familiar with.
It could be a mustache.
Yes, absolutely.
It could have been several things and it could have been Beverly.
If you're going, if you're going as far as the boots, if you're skating from head to toe
and you settle on boots,
at what point is Caches Clay, Muhammad Ali,
not brought up in this meeting?
Because if there is a tie between Louisville,
Louisville, and Miami,
in sports, and this idea was brought forth
by the Louisville Athletic Commission,
how do they have the blind spot
to not make it boxing gloves?
It's gotta be a cashous clay.
Muhammad Ali type of Italian at that point.
They need to make one of those like
groucho marks masks with the mustache,
with a pipe that hangs down.
And then the players put them on after they win.
Is this thing going to become so ridiculous,
so out of place, a meme in a sense,
like the civil conflict trophy that now this trophy matters and now we actually have juice
to this rivalry because they were trying to do something and it's now become a joke
and now we want in on the joke, we want in on the experience, boom organic bomb, barbon
hymer type of rivalry. Your solution to this entire rivalry is to make it the trophy in Instagram filter.
I'm down for that.
Why are we, why are we bounding ourselves,
binding ourselves to things of this world?
We should,
I'm gonna try to tell you Mike,
you don't listen to that.
We should expand our horizons and make
an exclusively available Instagram
filter. You're trying to sell an app.
Yeah. You're trying to make this trophy.
It's your top shot and app.
Yeah. I just want to wear these shoes.
And no, you get an NFT and you'll like it.
Yeah. You get.
Now that's Miami.
Yeah. That's Miami.
How about we play for the crypto bull?
That's blocks away.
There's just so many more choices that they can make with this.
And they settled on boots.
Boots that I learned he wore.
Also, surprise head.
It's only four years.
The last thing legacy down here, coach Nell and burger head.
And he did that all in four years.
In Miami fashion, he left a little early.
Oh, that's a low.
It's a tad low.
Like the boots.
little early. Oh, that's as low as a tad low like the boots.
Desperate.