The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz - The Big Suey: Bobblehead Theft
Episode Date: March 14, 2024Charlotte is here to take a victory lap for picking the Pistons based on Taj Gibson. The Pittsburgh Penguins had a truck full of Jaromir Jagr bobbleheads stolen. Also, Amin is playing in a celebrity b...asketball game. How high does he rank on the hierarchy of celebrity in the game? David Samson and Adnan Virk are here for one last breakdown of the Oscars and share their biggest takeaways now that the dust has settled. They also answer Dan's questions on some of the hottest storylines in baseball. Finally, Maxx Crosby and Gardner Minshew have beef and the crew discusses Calvin Ridley's contract with the Titans. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Transcript
Discussion (0)
You're listening to DraftKings Network.
Welcome to the Big Sui, presented by DraftKings.
Why are you listening to this show?
The podcast that seems very similar to the other Dan LeBattard podcast.
I'm sorry, I'm not going to apologize for that.
In fact, the only difference seems to be this imaging.
I have been tempted in restaurants
just walking past tables to grab somebody's fries
that if they're just there.
That hasn't happened to you guys?
I've done it.
And now here's the marching man to nowhere,
fat face and the habitual liar.
Amin is taunting me because yesterday I exclaimed that you cannot make a bet in which your chief reasoning is Taj Gibson is playing in 2024.
The Detroit Pistons have now won, is it three or four? They're three and one in their last four games because they have signed Taj Gibson. Now I thought that the rest of Taj Gibson's career
was going to be to just end up wherever Tom Thibodeau ends up.
And once that expired, and it did recently
on a 10-day contract with the Knicks,
I thought that was over.
But now Taj Gibson is back, and the Detroit Pistons
are winning.
And why are you holding that up in my face, Charlotte?
Because you told me that it was a terrible idea in 2024 yesterday to base a bet on Taj Gibson.
But a quarter of the Pistons wins this season
have come with Taj Gibson on the team
for his 10 day contract.
We demand justice for Taj.
Also, I demand that the Detroit Pistons
do its best for them, sign him for the rest of the year.
Also, Charlotte, Dan LeBattard disrespected you
on national television, international television yesterday.
So he needs to apologize on international television.
Not on a private dinner, but in front of everybody.
Okay, well I will and would apologize
if Taj Gibson was the reason that the Detroit Pistons won.
Okay, okay, okay.
No, no, wait a minute, wait a minute.
He needs to be explained.
You see, they weren't winning, then they signed him, and then they've won 75.
I know what you're going to say.
I know what you're going to say.
Charlotte, Taj didn't touch the floor last night.
And you know what I say, Dan?
Locker room guy.
Vet leadership.
What I'm saying is that when you're making a bet on behalf of our biggest sponsor, where you're telling people DraftKings and we endorse this bet,
even if that bet wins, your reasoning for having made that bet is super flimsy and I believe should be career threatening if the reason for it is,
I believe a team will win in 2024 because of something Taj Gibson has done.
I don't think I should apologize.
I feel like my reasoning is stronger than yours
even though you won the bet.
He's almost a player's coach at this point.
Also, it sounds like something a loser would say.
Yeah.
I just feel like you don't wanna apologize
because you know you're wrong, Dan.
You and Michael Jordan.
Can I lose the bet and still be right?
That you can't make a bet?
Okay, okay, all right, and then okay.
Well, we seem to be stuck here,
because it doesn't seem like I'm giving you guys
the apology you want, because.
We just want justice for Taj.
Numbers never lie, shout out to Jamil.
But they do in this case, because if there's.
Well, well.
They're not lying.
You know, I mean, look, if you followed what Charlotte in this case, because if there's... Well, well. They're not lying.
Look, if you followed what Charlotte and what Producer
Thomas have been saying since Taj Gibson signed
with the Pistons, you would have made a lot of money.
Yeah.
Producer Thomas knows what he's talking about.
He's been on this train.
Taj Gibson retweeted him when it had a hashtag.
He retweeted oddball because it said, a rising tide hashtag ride with Thomas for Taj Gibson retweeted him when it had a hashtag. He retweeted oddball because it said hashtag
a rising tide, hashtag ride with Thomas for Taj Gibson.
I hope Taj sees this and sees how much we appreciate
what he is doing with his leadership
and sense of cohesiveness for this team.
You know what Sullivan, get us Taj Gibson.
Get us Taj Gibson.
Let's make Dan apologize to Taj Gibson on air.
How about that? So you're gonna ruin the show as well.
Oh, wow.
Oh, ruin it by doing it right.
Oh, now I really need an apology.
Yeah, oh, boy.
How dare you?
Put it on the poll, Jujurat Levittar,
does the audience want to hear from Taj Gibson?
Yes or no?
I think they're gonna come back overwhelmingly yes.
Same.
Because it's gonna make you look bad, Dan,
and that's what this show's all built around,
you looking bad.
I don't want to grab the steering wheel here
But there's a breaking news story here that is very interesting to me. The penguins we're gonna have Yamir Yager
Bobblehead night tonight, but they just announced
Yamir Yager did I put an extra syllable? How do you spell it? Go ahead and spell it?
I'm not gonna take a quiz. I think it's J. A spell it. How do you spell it? You spell it. I got you. Good move.
I'm not gonna take a quiz.
I think it's J-A-M-I-R.
No, it's J.
I think it's J-A-R-O-M-I-R.
Whatever, guys.
Oh, you know what I'm talking about.
What are we doing here?
It's one of the most famous hockey players ever.
No.
This is fun, what I'm bringing up right here.
Unless you guys just wanna do this.
Go ahead.
No, let's do this.
The Penguins announced today that the shipment
carrying the Yager bobbleheads for tonight's game has been stolen! Unless you guys just want to do this. Go ahead. No, let's do this. The Penguins announced today that the shipment carrying
the Jagger bobbleheads for tonight's game has been stolen!
En route to the arena.
So that they will not have bobbleheads tonight.
The shipment is like, what, is it a truck?
Bobblehead heist, Dan.
Bobblehead heist.
Box truck.
Bobblehead heist, I think those are gonna be hard
to sell at the pawn shop.
So I'm gonna look up, I'm gonna see what happened here,
but we have a developing story.
Okay, so you're imagining a single truck and a heist,
an armored, there was a guy, a Brinks truck driver
the other day got his pants in the street.
Daniel showed his back.
Just taken off.
I'm sorry?
He got robbed, an armored truck driver
not only got robbed. And then they mooned him.
But while he was in the street, he got his pants pulled off
because somebody was videotaping.
It's not enough that you got your truck stolen,
but the person stealing the truck
also made you take your pants off in front of everybody.
They weren't snap-offs?
They were not basketball warm-up pants, no.
Just checking.
That the armored driver.
For the visual.
We were shocked to be a victim of cargo theft.
And we were working closely with local
and federal authorities on the investigation.
Oh, the Fed's own, huh?
I'm picturing Fast Five.
So are these pirates?
Was this on a ship?
Ha ha ha!
On the high seas.
Arr, matey, a vast.
You think it's a cargo ship that was stolen?
The bobbleheads were stolen from a ship, not a truck?
Because it's a shipment?
Yeah.
I thought it was on a ship.
Track the logic.
Dan, you mentioned Taj Gibson did not play Coach's Decision last night, and it reminded
me of a story I don't think we've talked about yet.
The Kobe Bryant statue that was unveiled that is now going to have to be retooled because
they misspelled a number of things on the trophy, including names and the word decision.
Which also begs the question,
did they have to put,
did not play coach's decision for those players?
Could they not have just left their stat line blank?
Cause it's a little embarrassing to be immortalized that way.
And they nailed the spelling right above it.
Yeah, it's supposed to be kind of the actual template
of the actual NBA box score
that you get when you're at the game
that the league hands out.
So that's why.
It does not explain how you could mess up
the spelling one line below.
It might be the one in Spanish.
Is that how you spell it?
Was there an accent there in decisión?
Well, I would allow for that,
except for the fact that they called Jose Calderon
Jose Calderon.
We talked about this on Oddball and came to the conclusion that the way they should fix this is they should have a little plaque.
You know how you have white out and you have to white out what you did wrong so that people
know there was a mistake?
They should have a little copper plaque that they have to drill into the stone so it corrects
the spelling but it's like you know someone messed up here.
Either that or they chisel in like a red squiggly line underneath them just to indicate these
were temples.
Kobe has three statues. There are going to be three statues that will be outside of the
arena. Allen Iverson is now having one built in Philadelphia. Does anyone other than Rocky
have one built in Philadelphia? Does Dr. J have a statue in Philadelphia? Moses Malone, anybody?
The practice facility, they have a lot of statues of...
Benjamin Franklin, too.
Oh, right. And there's a big bell.
And William Tell. William Tell has a statue, too.
It's on the top of a building, though.
You wouldn't dare take the blasphemous opinion
that three statues is too much.
No one's going to object.
No one can publicly say that three statues is too much. You just have going to object. No one can publicly say that three statues is too much.
You just have to walk away and say the Lakers can honor him however they wish to honor him,
correct?
William Tell?
William Penn.
William Penn.
William Tell is overture is what I was thinking about.
With the apple.
Yes, but William Penn is the one with the statue because remember they had that curse.
If you had a building taller than William Penn, they wouldn't have won anything and
then they won so nobody cares about this. Thank you.
I'm glad you didn't answer my question
but gave us a history of William Penn and William Tell.
There you go.
Can you answer my question as our basketball expert?
No.
I mean, I could answer the question
when the mics and the cameras are off.
OK.
That's where you draw the line on how to take it.
It's too hard to take.
You don't want to get aggregated on that one.
For what? For what? It's too hard to take. You don't want to get aggregated on that one.
For what?
For what?
It's someone who died tragically in a helicopter accident,
Jessica.
Even I've got like.
Samson would do it.
Samson would do it.
But then he'd wonder why he wasn't invited to things.
That's the difference.
I know.
I didn't know that your opinions were
sailed for invitations to parties. Of course they are. What? You didn't know this? i don't know that your opinions were sales of for an invitations to parties
uh... of course they are what you know this i didn't know that what do you think
of what also weekend every year for
he's playing in a celebrity basketball game i mean it's playing in a celebrity
basketball game he's been angling for this
yeah i'm at this is a big a big moment but also
uh... terrifying moment yes can't has your back
the band in here limping backs not great
backs not great.
But why? Because you're carrying the team on it.
This team right here. You mean the All-Star team? Oh, no.
The risk reward, though, of this. Like, what's best case scenario?
You score eight points. No, no, no. Best case scenarios.
I get out of there alive. OK, that's the best case scenario.
Like Tomlin. So you're not worried about how you actually play?
No, I'm legit 100% worried about.
Embarrassing yourself.
No, no, I don't even care about that.
I don't wanna get hurt, that's the big thing for me.
I don't wanna get hurt.
But it is for a good cause, I believe Athletes Unlimited,
which is a pro league in different sports
for female athletes.
Specifically, obviously I know a lot of the basketball ones.
This is so they don't have to go overseas
to weird places to go make money.
And they all have kind of an ownership stake
in the league itself, so it's a very cool kind of concept.
But yeah, I don't want to get hurt, Chris.
What is your level of celebrity in this game?
Like how big is the biggest celebrity how small is
the smallest celebrity and where do you rank the biggest celebrities are
definitely going to be the former athletes uh... so i think sure soaps is
one of the coaches uh...
got a look to the list but there are a lot of
big-name athletes who are part of the would we be impressed by you making the
celebrity cut you're not not gonna get a Taj Gibson
did not play coaches decision.
You are a legitimate celebrity draw.
I legitimately asked for a Taj Gibson DNPC.
I just wanna go warm up, get shots up,
and then like sit on the bench,
and they said, no, you gotta play.
You asked to be benched?
Dude, you don't understand the amount of terror
running through me about the idea.
I haven't played a full court basketball game
since the NBA Finals 2016.
And it's just injury related?
It's not just I'm going to actually embarrass myself
as well that people are gonna see
that the basketball expert can't play
because he's old and his body hurts?
No, I mean, like I think if I play and don't get hurt,
people are gonna see I can play,
but it's not gonna look amazing. I'm not gonna be out there windmilling on people, but I know if I play and don't get hurt, people are gonna see I can play. But it's not gonna look amazing.
I'm not gonna be out there windmilling on people,
but I know how to play basketball, man.
Like, I know where to stand, I know when to screen.
I know where to hide.
Chris Cody, why are you and Jessica
looking at a TV screen?
Do you have footage of the main playing basketball?
I have a list of the other celebrities in this thing.
Okay, yeah, because I was trying to look that up.
Is it gonna be a celebrity basketball game
with celebrity in quotes?
I'm trying to find someone else I've be a celebrity basketball game with celebrity in quotes trying to find someone else
I've heard of here Ben Lyons is playing
Okay, hold on you Jimmy King. You don't know who Jimmy King is from the Fab five
Okay, Jimmy King the least known member of the Fab five Cheryl Ford
Three time WNBA all-star Rolando Blackman
He's one of the greatest players in Dallas Mavericks history.
To be fair, I didn't know who half the celebrities at the NBA All-Star Game were.
See, those are different because those are all like TikTok people. You guys should know who they are.
The like blonde kid.
I don't know.
And country singers.
And that too.
Also Derek Holland and M.B. Pitcher.
There you go. Why you get...
Because they don't know who Ronaldo Blackman is,'s why. Rolando not Ronaldo. Rolando. I got stuck on
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Don LeBretard!
David Sampson, weirdo.
Because he was not...
He was not the fun substitute teacher who'd wheel out a TV and play a VHS tape of
Armageddon in science class.
He was the weird one who would eat an egg salad sandwich while clipping his toenails
into the trash can and ranting about Ronald Reagan.
Stugats!
The guy kept talking about how his ass was smooth, smoother than a newborn's cheek.
He wouldn't stop bragging about his bare buttocks to me.
This is the Don LeBattar Show with the StuGats.
Look at these two radiant gentlemen, still resplendent with enthusiasm over conquering
the weekend, a giant success success they covered the Academy Awards
from about as geographically far from the the actual awards as you could be
while remaining in the contiguous United States but they got some of it on them
and they're still excited about it and then Burke his podcast is cinephile
David Sampson his podcast is nothing personal I urge you if you're interested
in the movies to check out both of those David Samson also goes far afield from the movies Adnan spends a lot of time diving
into the weeds no one no one cares about film and and and diving into the weeds on film the way
Adnan Virk does but I want to talk baseball with you guys before we get started here and I also
wanted to talk to you about what we were talking about with the problems
that Boeing is having.
Used to be our safest airlines, did a bunch of
profit, cost cutting measures,
and now not terribly safe.
David, what thoughts do you have here on
everything going on with Boeing as their
whistleblower? Man, I don't know
what to do with this story. The whistleblower
found dead, self-inflicted,
gunshot wound,
and I hear a lot of people whispering
about not believing that that was self-inflicted,
and I don't know how the hell you proved that.
Well, it's not gonna be, there's gonna be no case,
there's gonna be no criminal case,
there'll be a small investigation,
and the fact is he had passed over
a lot of his information already to lawyers.
There are a bunch of ongoing cases,
but the scariest part is that he felt as a whistleblower that he had no other option and
There may have been other things going on in his life
But the most public part is he had basically come clean to investigators about all the shoddy safety
At Boeing and we found out this week the worst possible thing
at Boeing and we found out this week the worst possible thing which is the Alaska Airlines plane where the door blew off
it was due to be taken out of circulation for maintenance
and they tried to squeeze one more day out of it and that one day is when the
door blew off
so this story is far from over. I was gonna say as always I look at it through the prism of
movies it makes me think of Rain Man Remember famously Dustin Hoffman wouldn't fly,
unless it was Qantas, because Qantas never crashed.
And speaking of whistleblowers, it
makes me think of the insider, the great film,
Russell Crowe as Jeffrey Wigand, taking down big tobacco
at a brilliant Al Pacino performance.
So yeah, it's pretty crazy to think about this story
and the way movies have done them as well.
I was going to add on something, but you know what, Adnan?
That was such a phenomenal, just your brain, the way it works done them as well. I was gonna add on something, but you know what, Adnan? That was such a phenomenal, just your brain,
the way it works, I love it.
It was just straight into movies about planes,
just 10 out of 10 no-no's.
Well, he had nothing else on the other stuff,
so he just defaulted to the safety net.
No, I was genuinely like a pros-pro.
Yes, he knows how to get it back to movies.
David, I can't imagine that you are somebody
who very often gets on a plane or a surgery
or does anything where he is handing his life over
to somebody and you're not doing meticulous research
to make sure that you're not doing that flippantly.
So I don't worry as much about flying, shockingly,
because the odds are with me.
I worry way much more about getting to the airport safely.
Obviously what's going on with Boeing is a great concern.
There have been tremendous delays
with the flights that I've been taking recently.
There's just not enough staffing.
I'm actually more worried
about the lack of air traffic controllers.
There's a problem there, not enough of them.
There's not enough people working on the tarmac,
so delays are insane.
So I have to waste time when I'm going to a location.
Like coming to Miami, you can't travel day of.
So I have to expense an extra night at a hotel
with MetalArk because you just can't risk
not making your show.
Imagine you spending more MetalArk money
instead of trying to save MetalArk money.
You were complaining that we didn't do merch madness correctly enough we didn't
promote it correctly enough well it's happening right now I think that it's
important for everyone to know that the bracket pool that we did for the Oscars
went so well we had 5600 people fill out Oscar ballots that what you've decided
to do is something called merch madness for the NCAA men's basketball tournament.
So you can go to lebatardaf.com,
fill out a bracket and try to beat people in your company.
I'd say try to beat me,
but I thought someone else in the container
was going to be the headliner of this, Chris.
So I don't know where we stand,
but you gotta beat someone and then you've gotta win
and there'll be tremendous prizes dan
I think you could up the ante by offering something cool like maybe on your show or one piece of your collection
Maybe a lunch something but we're trying to get way more people to join merch madness
Okay, I will figure out something to give away David
Can you tell me because I've been meaning to ask you this for several days now, was there any particular strategic reason that you didn't tell the
people what they were playing for on Sunday? Your memorabilia connections and your collection
are expansive and you didn't tell people what you were giving away. And I think if you told
them what you were giving away, you have things that are worth a lot of money, but why didn't
you tell them?
Because I'm actually gonna contact the winner
and I'm gonna speak to the winner
about what part of my collection they'd like.
So why would I wanna give, for example,
a Lowell jersey if they'd prefer a Cabrera jersey
or something like that?
So I wanted to make it personal,
which of course my show is nothing personal,
but in this case, it's personal.
So I wanted to give someone something
that they would cherish.
Now it is a little confusing
because the bracket is not available yet to fill out.
So right now, you can go there and you can sign up,
and then when the brackets become available,
you will get an email that's saying,
the brackets are now active, so now you can fill it out.
Can I get some suggestions from the group
on what they think I should be giving away?
What can I give away of value to make this something
that you guys have seen that I own
or can give people as a?
Celebrity experience of some sort that would have the value to make this a bigger bigger prize popcorn
Recipe and levatar popcorn exactly we've all had it
We've all tasted it a little tough at first as Lucy said but warmed up considerably Dan levatar popcorn. I'm in
Tough at first.
What is the top five list for today
that you guys are doing?
And now we're trying to get people to sign up actually.
So popcorn is not in.
No, I mean, it's not a great prize
when you're saying a little tough at the beginning.
Like that's not what people are looking for
from their popcorn slogan.
I think what you could give,
which is the most important asset you have,
Dan, is your time.
Exactly, lunch with Levitard.
Not even a lunch, that's weight.
If someone gets a perfect bracket, then lunch with you,
but I would say a private Zoom, a 15 minute Zoom with you
will make this one of the biggest contests ever.
Get ready to cry.
I would take money.
A South Beach Sessions and $100.
I love Dan doing a South Beach Session with a random, like Dan will do a South Beach Session
with you.
What's your darkest moment?
We'll both end up weeping, the both of us.
I think that's a great idea, because it's mine.
Truly terrible idea.
Give me what your top five list is.
Top five takeaways from this year's Academy Awards.
Number five, John Cena was not really naked.
He wore a sack over his crack and a little thing over his pee pee.
He wore a sock.
He was not naked.
Put it on the poll please.
Did John Cena wear a sack over his crack?
What over his what?
His pee pee.
His pee pee. His pee pee.
His pee pee.
Number four.
Number four.
Ryan Gosling could have been Justin Bieber.
Ryan Gosling started the Mickey Mouse Club
and he is a tremendous performer.
He performed his Oscar nominated song and he was good.
Did Bieber, he was a Mickey Mouse club or is
that Timberlake? He was not a Mickey Mouse club. That was Timberlake. I'm saying that if
Ryan Gosling had gone into just wanting to record and perform he could have been
a huge huge star in that way. Number three. Marty Scorsese needs a better
publicist. His movie took the doughnut. He's owed for his last gazillion at the Academy Awards.
I don't want him to do a Harvey, obviously.
He's got to do something better.
Owe for his last 26 to be specific.
Unfortunately, Wolf of Wall Street owed for five, Silence owed for one, The Irishman owed
for 10, and Killers of Flaubert owed for 10.
Appalling.
I mean, I'm sorry.
Adnan would indeed
apply for publicist position.
I tried to take a picture of you the other day
outside the hotel, Adnan, just wearing a Martin Scorsese
shirt.
It just said, what's that shirt you
own that has the words Martin Scorsese on them?
I thought you would comment on that when I did the show.
The shirt just says directed by Martin Scorsese.
And while I was waiting, by the way, somebody walked by and saidorsese and while I was waiting by the way somebody walked by and said nice
shirt like thank you very much don't see that often here in Miami speaking of
merch what does that mean like the shirt like when you wear it what does it mean
it means I'm directed by Martin Scorsese yeah okay yeah yeah exactly telling his
opinions about the movies when he's on here that they are directed by Martin
Scorsese something to ponder did Martin Scorsese direct himself out of the hall?
Hold on, let me go get the file.
Number two.
Number two, Jimmy Kimmel's monologue was terrible.
Oh.
I didn't get a chance to hear it much because we were on the air.
So yesterday in the middle of the night, wait Adnan.
Last night, middle of the night, I both watched the beginning of Argyle
and I watched the entire Academy Awards
because you can get it on Hulu
and I didn't get a chance to watch it with you.
So I saw his monologue, horrible.
Horrible is a little bit harsh.
I'm with it David, it could have been sharper and fresher,
but it wasn't horrible.
And number one, Emma Stone is the next Meryl Streep.
You guys broke that take on Sunday.
You're now saying just because.
Well they speculated on Sunday
and now he's saying it's for sure.
Now you're saying it's so.
That's a takeaway from the Academy Awards.
That was the top five list.
What did you think of all of that Adnan?
What he just said, all of it.
Where are your objections? Listen, Meryl Streep, I mean that's tough
to put anybody in her category. Now as David said to me Sunday, eventually there
will be another Meryl Streep. You can't just say you know nobody can ever
approach that territory, but to me she's just so hallowed. Emma Stone's a great
actress, two Oscars the age of 35 certainly is notable, but it's tough to
put anybody in that category. It's like saying someone is the next De Niro.
And I went David Parsley on Kimmel.
I was expecting more bite from that monologue, but when I watched it myself, because we weren't
really able to watch it Saturday, Sunday, I thought it was all right.
Jimmy's a very affable guy.
I think he's a decent host.
I think David's being a little harsh on him.
It's a tough job, as we know, hosting the Academy Awards.
I thought it was fine.
And the number one takeaway that I didn't say is I kicked Adnan's ass.
Bonus!
I don't know what that is. I didn't want a bonus take and it's not number one take that
you didn't say. And you've eaten up more of Adnan's time. Does Adnan have a top five
list because I wanted to talk some baseball with you guys.
I would like to. I do want to get some baseball but I'll fly through. All right, number five. Skip the list of the best picture nominees.
Al Pacino has started a trend.
That's good work at Al.
We watched three and a half hours.
I don't need to know the past lives is up for best picture.
Pacino knows what he's doing.
I see Oppenheimer.
Number four, the new start time was a slam dunk.
That sounded a little like Daniel Day Lewis.
That sounded in no country. That sounded like there will be sounded a little like Daniel Day Lewis. That sounded in no country.
That sounded like there will be blood a little bit.
Listen to me, Eli, you sniveling ass.
That's your best take of your life.
7 o'clock Eastern, no later.
Thank you, Jess.
7 o'clock Eastern, we're done by 10 22.
I mean, him, he was stretching at the end.
He wanted to get to 10 30 for Abbott Elementary.
Phenomenal.
From now on, we're going to 7 o'clock Eastern.
Number three, everyone always talks about in memoriam,
how they screwed up.
And yes, there was a lot of focus
on the names at the end.
Here's my thing.
No more interpretive dancing during in memoriam.
This tab, Andrea Bocelli and his son, and that's it.
You don't need to dance.
I don't know why there's dancing going on.
It's remorning people who have died.
That whole bit made me want to be an Italian opera singer so bad.
Put it on the poll please.
Should it just be death and no dancing in the memorial?
All death and no dancing.
Number two, while I normally really love seeing
the clips of the nominees, having the past winners come out,
serenade them, I thought was amazing.
Lupina Nyong'o, one of the nicest moments of the night when she said to Davine Joy Randolph, you wore the glasses
that your grandmother wore during the holdovers. What a pleasure to see the world through her
eyes and your eyes. Beautiful moment. And of course, Nick Cage had the best laugh of
the night when he said, actors will do anything to put themselves in the role. Daniel Day
Lewis was Lincoln the entire time. In the holdovers, Paul Giamatti wore a soft contact
lens in his left eye, which rendered him blind the entire time. Would I have done the same
thing? Hell yes, but so did you, Mr. Giamatti. Bravo. Great to have the pass winners out
there. As much as I love when they showed the clip reels, that was great.
What are you laughing about, Samson?
It's taken him so long.
Okay, number one.
He's got a lot to say. You took up the whole segment. You do it every week.
And number one, John Mulaney should host next year.
I agree.
His riff on Field of Dreams is absolutely hysterical.
That was the funniest moment of the night.
Better than John Cena, better than anything else.
Mulaney to host, he was awesome.
He'd be great because he wouldn't respect
the fame in the room.
Like he would absolutely puncture the fame in the room. Like he would absolutely puncture the fame in the room.
Give me, before here we let you guys go,
the Yankees, an epic, forgettable disaster last year
and now Garrett Cole is hurt.
They're not the best thing in the division anymore.
Are they closer to the worst thing in the division?
I'll go quick, David, and then you jump on it.
I was with Sean Casey last night,
and Casey, a friend of the show, said to me, listen,
when they say inflammation, eventually he's a friend
of the show.
He loves Levitora.
I remember he was on Levitora.
Danny asked him, he goes, who is most comfortable
in their nudity?
And he said Pete Hardish.
Great moment.
Look it up.
Anyways, inflammation in the elbow.
They're going to wait a month for the inflammation
to go down. Once the inflammation goes down, there has Anyways, inflammation in the elbow. They're gonna wait a month for the inflammation to go down.
Once the inflammation goes down,
there has to be something causing the inflammation.
So if there's even a slight tear there,
there's guys that have pitched through tears
like Masi Rotanaka, Andy Pettit,
but I don't wanna say the words, Tommy John.
David, this guy's been the best pitcher in baseball
the last couple of years.
He was the one guy that is irreplaceable.
They've got a problem.
They could have traded for Dylan Cease,
but the Padres in a stunning move traded for Dylan Cease, the White Sox
Pseudo-Ace. He's not an ace, but he could be and people are upset with Brian Cashman who is GMing for his job.
Yeah, and I give him credit for not pulling the trigger on a lopsided deal because most GMs would have because if the Yankees don't
make the playoffs again this year, I would say Boone and Cashman are both gone. Yes or no they're closer to the
bottom of the division than they are to the top. No. No I still think with that
lineup they're pretty elite. Klaiber Tours is a great spring, Volpys look good
and Soto and Judge together I still think they're close to the top of the
bottom. You guys don't hold the the the Rays and the Orioles in the esteem that
I do huh? I hold the Orioles in the esteem that I do, huh?
I hold the Orioles in great esteem.
I believe they'll win the division, not the Yankees, even though the Yankees may be favored.
I've got to check the DraftKings odds right now, but I would say the Yankees are close
to second to third place, not first.
Rays pitching pretty beat up right now, Dan, but their offense is great.
Give me your most interesting thoughts on Mookie Betts to shortstop please. I think it's
pretty shocking I can't think of another player that you could say you're a
goldglover at right field how do you feel about second base sure and then
after a couple weeks after Gavin Lux apparently is going through Steve Sacks
Ida's Chuck Knoblock I just and said can you shortstop too like I just think
that's remarkable that Mookie can do it and I'm worried about Gavin Lux the good
news is he's hit 310 this spring but David that's awfully concerning
to see what's happening this young man.
Yes and for me I don't want Mookie Betts at shortstop I'm very concerned it is a much
more difficult position than second base and my way to see on nothing personal is he plays
under a hundred games at shortstop because the Dodgers are going to realize pretty quickly
that they can't sacrifice his offense.
Who's better Braves or Dodgers?
Braves.
I'll go Dodgers.
See you guys later.
Talk to you next week.
Thanks, Dad.
And a little thing over his pee pee.
It was a big thing actually.
Whoa!
Don LeBretard!
Common thread was Stu Gotts coming it up with Aaron Rodgers.
Yep.
I mean I met my quarterback.
Yeah, as you know, as you know.
Stu Gotts didn't talk to Aaron Rodgers.
Nope.
Stu Gotts thought country music superstar Jake Owen was Aaron Rodgers.
They had a 20 minute conversation.
Identical twins.
I mean, Jesus.
Stugats.
Listen, I will never have the relationship with Aaron Rodgers that I have with the guy
that I thought was Aaron Rodgers.
I mean, that is the greatest conversation I've ever had with my cornerback.
This is the Dunn-Levatar Show with the Stugats.
I don't know about the rest of you, but I would pay a lot of money to have access to
all of the stuff that NFL Films has that it doesn't disseminate because it's a league partner
and a lot of people are wired for sound and there's all sorts of stuff we don't
see and hear because NFL Films has always been a wonderful marketing arm
for the NFL but they protect the NFL and so there's very little footage that gets
out there that the NFL doesn't want out there.
But one of the things I've always enjoyed is the tiny bits of trash talk
that there are on a field where everyone is doing something that's incredibly hazardous.
So I've told you guys the story before.
Ted Washington, the 340 pound former defensive tackle for the bill spent an
entire game at the bottom of piles saying to Ricky Williams again and again,
hello, Ricky.
And finally, by the fourth quarter, Ricky's like, why do you keep doing that?
He's like, I was just saying hello.
I wanted, I hadn't seen you.
I was just saying hello at the bottom of the pile.
Aaron Rogers during simpler times told us this story about being chased around
By the terrifying Kyle Vanden Bosch, I believe Kyle was a very good player for a number of years
He used to wear red
Contacts which was he didn't need because he's already tutored on the edge of insanity
So I remember, you know one time he got me and he was kind of, you know, he wasn't getting
off me and he's like, I got you good.
I'm like, he hit me in the head though.
He goes, no way.
I was like, no, I think it's going to be a penalty.
He goes, no.
I got you.
Also another play involving him, we ran a, like a seven man protection.
He looped from his end and our fullback kind of blasted him a little bit.
He wasn't looking, so Kyle thought it was a cheap shot.
And instead of getting up and chasing the play down, he chased the fullback down
and ended up running a route out to the right.
It was like, I'll kill you.
I don't know if you've heard the latest on Aaron Rodgers. I don't even think I want to discuss it. I really don't. I don't.
Okay, you don't?
No, I don't. But the thing I do want to discuss is Gardner Minshew, this wired for sound, and I can't play for you because we don't have the rights, but he's being chased around by Max Crosby. Max Crosby was
doubled more than just about any edge rusher in the NFL last year. Top 10.
Terrifying. Looks like he's straight out of Sons of Anarchy and he keeps
whispering under his breath when he's getting close to Gardner Minshew just
whispering, little ass boy. And he keeps whispering it to him and finally they get min shu on the
sidelines with his teammates
and he's looking around and asking them like
is max always so angry
is he always so angry and then kind of sweetly
but also defensively
well i'm a little out here but I'm not a little ass boy everywhere.
Like, I know, but he's like, I'm not a little ass boy.
Like why does he keep chasing me around?
But yeah, but out of here I am,
yes compared to him I am.
You'd be like the fourth tallest person in this room,
I feel like.
A tall room.
I mean, if you're, put it on the pole please, Juju.
If you're over six feet, are you ever a little ass boy? the thing is max Crosby's like six ten four hundred pounds when he's wearing the the pads in the
Helmet he looks like a giant. He's terrifying. He should play with spikes on his shoulder pets like he should be out of
You know Mad Max. He should be
Running around out there. What is it? What is the latest Mad Max, Miuri? Is it Fury Road, the latest one?
He's something.
I mean, if he gets spikes on his shoulders, though,
someone else on the other team should too.
That's an unfair advantage.
He'd have the unfair advantage if he has the spikes,
no matter how many other people have spikes.
He already has one without the spikes, by the way.
I would not, but now they're teammates.
Now, Minshew is hell-bent on playing
for every last team in the league, and now he're teammates now Minshew Minshew is hell-bent on playing for every last team in the league
And now he is teammates with somebody who's been chasing him around the field calling him a little less boy
You think he's crazy in practice too is that could be something? He's always correct. Come on. Come on
Like you think this is I don't think he comes in and out of character. I think that under method
Dane, do you put the pads on he's just a maniac?
I think that under method.
Dane, he puts the pads on. He's just a maniac.
Not even not.
I don't think he needs the pads.
I believe I believe in the tattoo shop.
He's the maniac.
I believe walking around in Whole Foods looking.
Yes, two exes Dan.
What Max do you know has two exes TJ?
Well, yes.
Tusha.
He got your ass.
He really did.
The best man.
He really, he really got your ass. He really did. The best Max. He really got your ass.
Other than HBO obviously.
Somebody's ass hasn't been gotten like that around here since earlier this week when I
said, I defied the audience, I said name one good quarterback who doesn't play on a good
offense and Jessica looks me in the eyes and says Mahomes.
And I was just checkmated. Bishop to rook Mahomes. And I was just checkmated.
Bishop to rook nine there, yeah.
I mean, I just checkmated.
I had like, oh yeah, the one who won the Super Bowl.
Yeah, that one.
The one whose offense was bad all year,
even though I know he's good.
Wide receiver's had historic drops.
Oh yeah, the most recent example
is the most obvious example and the truest example,
but name another.
But you're right, you got the one.
You got me on the
one you got my ass because Patrick Mahomes is indeed a quarterback we all
regard as a good quarterback who is this year on a bad offense. Josh Allen's kind
of on a bad offense too. I think that's where the conversation started because I
said Stephon Diggs at 30 is the oldest member of the Bills and then it became a
conversation is their offense good or is their quarterback good? Did Calvin Ridley
get overpaid?
Because I saw that contract he got,
I believe it's 90 million.
92 million.
And I'm just thinking as a Dolphins fan,
man, we're going to have to pay Jalen Waddle so much.
The funny thing is the Titans didn't want to pay AJ Brown,
who's better and younger, the same amount of money.
So they traded him to then get Calvin Ridley, who's
three years older, who's spent a year away from football
for gambling, and then gave him that money.
I do think when you say that money, it's half that money, because all that matters in these contracts,
please stop being fooled by this, all that matters is the guaranteed money. All the rest you're getting
is just agents using insiders, get those numbers in a crazy place. The only thing that matters is
the guaranteed money. The money is guaranteed in baseball, the money is guaranteed in basketball, it is not guaranteed in football, but when Christian Wilkins signs
for 110 million, the important part of that is 85 is guaranteed. Ridley's at about 50.
But you've seen, we're obsessed here with the money. This is the thing. Forgive me if
all of you understand the salary cap permutations better than I do, and all of you saw that
what was going to happen at running back and the devaluation of running back was going to
make it this off this obvious but I did not have happening on the bingo card
when I was paying Todd Worley and Ezekiel Elliott and and Dalvin cook I was
paying all of them thank you you're welcome I did not have
Saquon Barkley signing for three years 37 million 26 million guaranteed and
Darnell Mooney signing for three years 39 million 26 million guaranteed
Like I did not have that as a possibility at any point the first time I saw Saquon Barkley the whole sport changed on me
And the finances of the sport changed on me so that One thing that hasn't great tastes Miller Lite.
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