The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz - The Big Suey: Dolphins-Bills ASMR
Episode Date: September 11, 2024After Dave Grohl announced that he has fathered a child out of wedlock, Dan asks the question: is there any celebrity you'd be willing to put on a pedestal? Then, how rough is van life? Plus, Jevon Ho...lland had a moment, we play a game of Against the Spread, and it's time for some Dolphins-Bills ASMR ahead of Thursday Night Football. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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Welcome to the Big Sui!
Presented by DraftKings.
Why are you listening to this show?
The podcast that seems very similar to the other Dan LeBattard podcast.
I'm sorry, I'm not going to apologize for that.
In fact, the only difference seems to be this imaging.
I have been tempted in restaurants just walking past tables to grab somebody's fries if they're just there.
That hasn't happened to you guys?
I've done it.
And now here's the marching man to nowhere, fat face and the habitual liar.
Put it on the poll please, Juju, at Levitard Show.
Who would surprise you more having a child out of wedlock, Dave Grohl or Chris Cody at the Levitard show.
Because I do think that you're allowed to be surprised
sometimes by the public image of someone fooling you
on what you thought they were versus what they end up being.
I fell for it with Tiger Woods.
We discussed that earlier. I will never fall for it again
I won't sorry can't be surprised
I think there's a difference between putting someone on a pedestal and then being like surprised when
Something in their personal life doesn't fit with their image. I think you can I think that there's a difference there
There's just some gray area. Would you be surprised if Patrick Mahomes cheated on his wife a
Little bit. Yeah, I would it and then I would move on I
Understand what it is that you're doing there Stu guts, but I would ask you to now go through
Whatever you think the public images are of people and now tell me where it is and how it is
You might be surprised.
For example, were any of you surprised that Ellen DeGeneres's career on
television ended the way that it did? Where her whole brand is nice. It's the
whole brand. It's everything that she was televising at all times. Not that
television is always real stugots
For example, I you've heard me recently make fun of Emanuel
Acho because of how performative he is and so he
He tweeted on his new show the facility
moments after a sad infuriating tear evoking Conversation on Tyreek Hill. I attempted to continue the show as if all was normal. It wasn't I'm grateful for James Jones
Who did not allow us to rush by our humanity on the facility? We're not doing TV. We're doing life
Dude, you're doing TV more than anybody's doing TV like you
You're doing TV more than anybody's doing TV. Like you, I understand.
You lead the league in television.
You're doing maximum television at all times,
but Barkley says all the time,
and he ain't wrong about this at all.
Lord knows, Stu Gotts, this dude for four decades
has figured out how to manipulate television
to his every whim.
And he's like, people believe television.
They trust and believe that what is happening on their television is a real thing and that
they know people who are on television.
So none of you were surprised by Ellen because I was.
And you know, anybody who makes it up through the teeth of comedy
is gonna have some elbows and teeth to be,
especially a woman, to make it through that world.
You better have some thick skin.
I think maybe we need to clarify our degrees of surprise.
Because I think there's the type of surprise
where you're like, huh, I'm surprised.
And then you go along with your day
and you're like, yeah, I guess that makes sense. But then there's the type of surprise where you're like, huh, I'm surprised. And then you go along with your day, and you're like, yeah, I guess that makes sense.
But then there's the type of surprise
where you're almost in shock, because it
rattles your entire world.
With Ellen, I was like, huh, I'm surprised.
And then I thought about it for a while, and I heard more.
And I was like, OK, moving on.
There's degrees.
A shock that rattled the entire world for me
was when they arrested Aaron Hernandez.
We were like, wait a second, what? Like he killed somebody?
That one for me was shocking.
That was a little further.
When you talk about like people having children at a wedlock,
there's a couple athletes here in Miami that have done that.
And have we been surprised by that?
I will tell you that I was legitimately stunned by OJ Simpson.
The first few days before he was actually arrested.
While he was innocent. Right. Yep.
The first couple of days of that, Stugatz, because his commercial appeal had been throughout
to be palatable to all. Like he was somebody who was one of the first spokesmen for commercial
things in sports. But that was murder.
So murder's the line for the show.
I'd say for me, murder's the line.
Well, for me, Ellen was the line,
and that's where I was putting it on,
gave off nice on television.
You guys not surprising though, took it to murder.
So if Patrick Mahomes murdered someone,
I would be shocked, okay?
But if he cheated on his wife, eh, move on.
Is it bad that I'm more surprised,
like, oh, this person's actually nice and decent move on is it bad that like I'm more surprised like oh this person's actually like nice
And decent yeah, like that's more surprising. I think they're not yeah, this person's not the best
I the thing that I'm having trouble with is just generally that this room would be so entirely
Cynical that I can't give you an example where you guys aren't going to say, yes, that person will fall to every temptation
and will not be a higher moral guide for me in any way.
That you guys are basically saying
that celebrity is so corrupt, a contaminant,
that there is no human being that you believe
will not succumb to all of the contaminants around celebrity.
That there is no such thing as a family person in celebrity.
That's what you're saying.
I can tell you that I would be shocked
if you cheated on your wife.
I could, I would be shocked.
I think we would all be shocked if you did that.
I wouldn't say that we're not surprised,
or not saying that there's not just
a family person in entertainment.
We're saying we know a lot of people
are capable of being multi-family people in the industry.
They love family so much that they want the secret ones.
They want more.
Kirk Cousins.
Bartolo Colon had a secret family.
Kirk Cousins, he's not accusing Kirk Cousins
of having a secret family.
It sounds like you just accused him
of having a secret family.
No, no, no.
I'm saying the one person in celebrity and in sports
who I could see being a straight down the middle guy
who's just doing his thing, going to work, coming back home, Kirk Cousins.
You say that, but history is replete with the anti-homosexuality televangelist who ends
up getting the gay massages on the side because what they're presenting to you isn't necessarily
what they actually are.
Now you're seeing behind the curtain of the cynical nature of the room here
where you're saying, anybody can do anything.
And I'm surprised that Dave Grohl's
got a kid out of wedlock, come on.
Philip Rivers would shock me if he had
a secret family somewhere.
That guy cannot have any more times
or any more seed in him, I'm telling you.
Not a couple more probably.
There's just no-
He does have the money for it though,
unlike a lot of people.
No, he does, but like the exhaustion
that must come with that.
Like, could you imagine having to have,
like what does he have now,
like 11 kids or something?
I think it's up to 13.
What?
And then more, like it just, it would be a lot.
The idea of an affair honestly is so exhausting.
Like I just, I can't fathom,
I'd rather be castrated than have an affair.
Wow.
I just can't, I can't fathom the effort
that goes into having to like lie and keep this secret
It's it's just it's too much work. I just want to sleep
It's too much work
Tony was saying during the break that he would be stunned if Billy had an affair just because he doesn't have time
He's too busy dragging the kids around like there's no
No place for him to actually hide anything the dogs dog's vomiting, his wife's calling him,
are you picking up the kids, am I picking up the kids,
where are you?
They're both sick this week as a whole thing.
Sometimes I think like, I tally up like all the coupons
that I like go and I make my like four or five
different stops at grocery stores at the same time.
My grocery, you know, trip takes probably two plus hours
where I could just go to one store.
And then I think to myself,
if I was paying myself hourly,
I would not come even close to getting even
on the amount of extra time I'm spending
doing all the grocery shopping
to save maybe 10 or $11.
I think Dan, the point is,
it maybe is a little unfair to assume that every person is a piece of shit or is capable of being a piece of shit.
But also, we all understand that humans are very complicated and make mistakes sometimes. I guess that's where I'm at.
And it's a fine place to be. I'm asking if there's any human being celebrity brand that you guys would be willing to put in a sacred place
above that.
It's what I keep asking you and the reason I keep asking it is because I don't want us
to be so cynical about the powers of temptation and celebrity that we do not believe that
a famous human of any kind can withstand what that immorality is.
Is anyone else making the observation incidentally,
because I have not been on the internet much
the last 36 hours, how impractical a car that is
for Tyree Kille to drive with that many kids?
Do you think he has three car seats in the back, Dan?
He's not driving those kids around in that car. I'm saying how impractical a car it is to have in general a Philip Philip Rivers shouldn't be driving that car if he's got
13 kids he has a minivan
Philip Rivers, you don't think to wreak has a big man not a minivan. He's got he's got the extendo
Wasn't he driving back and forth from San Diego to Los Angeles because
it's too much of a hassle to bring the whole family with him. So his commute was two hours
every day and like a Winnebago. Isn't that what he was doing? He was actually doing his
commute was like two hours a day when he was Chargers quarterback.
He would travel from San Diego to LA back to San Diego. you're right the car that he had it's great
there's pictures of it on the internet it had multiple televisions so he could do filmwork
be prepared for the games go over practice the whole deal it was like a house have you
seen like on Instagram where people have like this van life thing where they take a Mercedes
Benz Sprinter that's like 20 feet long and then redo it so they can live inside of it
and travel the world or whatever Frank you wants to do that by the way,
little side note.
But, our security guy.
Our security guy, yeah.
Thank you for the side note.
No, he told me, he's like,
my dream one day is to take a Sprinter, redo it,
and then I can drive around the country
and live in the Sprinter.
It's only beneficial for the people
in the back of the Sprinter.
The person that's driving it, it means nothing to them.
Again, it's not so much like the sleeping,
it's the bathroom situation.
Like you're showering outside
and you have to save all the water you use and reuse it
and use it to flush your toilet
and then you have to empty your own septic tank of your RV.
Like that part is not for me.
The driving around and sleeping part, I can manage that.
I do that already, but I don't wanna be using a bathroom
next to where I sleep and then have to empty it out myself.
I'm with you.
RVs and boats have uncomfortable bathroom situations
and airplanes as well.
The only thing, because I can romanticize
traveling the country very peacefully, quietly,
Jack Kerouac style, just enjoying different cultures,
different places, different tastes,
and slowing life down
right up until you put me in a cramped shower.
And I'm like, nope, we can speed life up
and it's totally good.
I need to be clean and comfortable
when I'm cleaning myself.
I don't wanna be in a small plastic place.
Once you join the van life though,
I feel like showers go out the window, right?
That's the problem.
You shower once a week.
I feel like yeah, van life once a week is fine.
You shower when you find a lake.
Exactly right.
I mean, what are you actually doing?
You live in a van.
It's not like you're going hiking.
You're just driving around in a van, point A to point B.
And when you get to point B, that's when you shower.
How sweaty and smelly can you get just sitting in a van?
How different is that from, like, our lives with our daily commutes to work,
and yet we shower every day?
Well, do we?
Put it on the poll, Juju at LeBatard Show.
Once you join van life, do showers go out the window?
If you see him on Instagram, you're like, the guy hasn't showered in about a couple
days.
I can tell.
Can we just go back to Dave Grohl's statement just for a second?
Because the first line is, I've recently become the we just go back to Dave Grohl's statement just for a second, because the first line is,
I've recently become the father of a new baby daughter
born outside my marriage.
Whoopsies, I've recently,
Was that in parenthesis?
I've become a, it's very passive voice.
He's like, oops, I don't know how that happened.
Did you not assume as I did,
this is how Letterman attacked something like this,
I immediately assumed that he was in danger of being outed,
that this isn't information that one volunteers
unless there's the threat some sort
of it being exposed on you.
Yeah, it's very possible that that was the case.
He was staying ahead of it.
Is it unfair to make that assumption?
Because once I read it done that way, I'm like, ooh, oh, okay.
There was something happening here
that was about to get more unpleasant if he's volunteering this to us. In the NFL, there is no margin for error.
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NFL. See stores for details. This is the Don Lebatar show with the Stugats
Stugats I have told you before that
Basically everything that happened around
OJ Simpson OJ Simpson.
OJ Simpson was the first athlete I liked.
Okay. Of any kind.
I'm at the Orange Bowl, my father's taking me
to my first game, we're yelling, squeeze the juice.
It's the first athlete I'm introduced to.
And then his image is sanitized in a way
that Ezra Edelman
documented in his Oscar-winning documentary about O.J. Simpson that
reveals that everything that happened around him had stuff that was being
viewed totally differently based on what your life experience was while
viewing it.
So OJ Simpson's trial was something that was legitimately for me the first time I ever
saw, wait a minute, how can everyone have the same set of facts and be viewing all of
this so differently depending on what their life experience is and it's basically become something in America that when I look at Trump now I feel the
same way how can everyone have the same set of facts here and see this all so
differently when it comes to Tyreek Hill this is what I'd like to explore with
you because there are many many people over the last few years who have left my side,
left our side, the show's side,
Miamians, South Floridians, who are like,
nope, that guy's brain is fried,
he's too woke for me, he's too far to the left
when I feel like I've just been standing
in the same place the whole time
and everything's moved away from me.
I don't think I've gotten any crazier I think the world has
gotten crazier and when Greg Cody sits here yesterday and says Tyreek Hill was
caught driving while black that was his crime it was a gross overreaction by the
police I thought it was a plain abuse of power and
then the reaction to that from John Stegerwald is
Tyreek Hill got caught speeding while black and he didn't put his window down while black and he
scolded the cop for tapping on his window while black and the cops overreacted you're busted for speeding put the window down and
Shut up and
That would be the more prudent way to not get arrested And I'm not saying that Tyreek Hill was in any way right for the way that he began that interaction
I simply don't look at that interaction and say that the police person's job is to make it any worse when you're not
person's job is to make it any worse when you're not actually
in danger once he does roll down the window right everything
that is after that feels unnecessary.
But I think that guy in response to Greg is saying that
if he just put the window down do with the cops tell you to do
in that situation and then you get to move on. But what if you
don't trust the cops though. I think what to read Hill said is plausible that he wanted the window up because people were taking pictures of him in his car Getting arrested getting detained, you know
Regardless of what the reasons for it are Stu gots
I understand anyone who wants to defend a police officer when tinted dark tinted windows go up and you don't know what the person
Inside is doing but once you've got him out of the car
and he's no longer obvious a threat my curiosity is
why is it that you would not view that as more than just a bit excessive why
would you not view all of that it's surely if it was happening to you
you would think it excessive.
You would not say,
I would want that to be the behavior
if I'm sarcastic with a cop
or if I'm arrogant with a cop.
I don't want it to escalate to there
unless you believe it is within the police officer's rights
and his job to mistreat the people
that he's trying or she's
trying to protect and serve.
I think most people would just put their window down and keep the window down.
That's what I think most people would do.
Agreed.
Tariq Hill did not do that.
Agreed.
He had his reasons for not doing that and they didn't realize it was Tariq Hill at the
time.
So.
But you're right that I wouldn't want to be photographed being detained by police if i was on my way to the stadium and i
was tyreek hill and i've already caused my organization's plural enough
headaches that i'd simply can't stay out of trouble that's part of what's
happening here i understand why it is even though they're case-by-case basis
why this makes for a very poor victim. Like his record makes him hugely unsympathetic.
Like I actually understand how anyone would arrive at
the cops are arresting a criminal there
or they're detaining a criminal,
someone who's got a criminal past.
Like that that would be their assessment
and perhaps you think that people with a criminal past
don't deserve the same humanity you deserve
if you're pulled over in sarcasm.
A civilian getting annoyed that they're pulled over can't
be new for these cops. Like that's the only thing that I don't... it just doesn't
make sense to me here. You... they probably deal with a half a dozen people who are
annoyed they're pulled over every day. It's like it's your job. You're paid.
You're the one here that's paid to de-escalate. You're supposed to be
prepared for the civilian to be emotional about this
because they're not working right now. So it's just, I don't understand the confusion
about this.
Yeah. I just feel like there's so many bad faith arguments about this. Like we all saw
what happened. There's no evidence to suggest that the cops handle the situation better
if he only did this. I mean, that's the same argument you hear from people who are arguing
in bad faith. Anytime one of these body cam video cam video gets released and it's like, well, they should have complied, they should have complied.
What evidence do you have that this situation could have gone any differently given now knowing what you know about what these police officers did?
Like you're just giving them the benefit of the doubt.
And I think the point is that we've been shown time and time again that like you can't automatically give them the benefit of the doubt in these situations. Like Chris said, this is what they're paid
to do. This is what they should be trained to do, deescalate and to not turn a traffic
stop into an unlawful detainment of someone. But I think some people are thinking, I agree
with you Jess, but I think some people are saying to re-kill contributed to that escalate.
Yes, on the pie chart, like 5%, 3% of like, yes, he didn't say immediately, oh, I'm so sorry for speeding, as most people would.
And it's just a crazy, both cops all of a sudden
in his window, like, oh, that's it, get out of the car,
roll your window down or get out of the car.
You know what, you're getting out of the car.
Like there was zero seconds for him even to comply.
There's also part of this video where they're yelling
at John Smith and like, there's different people yelling
different instructions at him at the same time
and he's trying to just.
Get in the car, give me your license.
Right, and it's like comply with what?
It's not clear what they really want anyone to do
at any time, they just were screaming.
I actually do understand, Stu Gotz,
and I think I'm gonna end up having to walk something back
from yesterday because I've talked to people
who know more about these things than I do and they do believe that the Miami Police Force is gonna
rally around because the the police have this community of it's a very difficult
job and it comes with a great deal of disrespect and the only people who know
how difficult the job it is are the people who are doing it.
And so they team up in us against the world
when something like this happens.
And I do now wonder, in a way I wasn't wondering yesterday,
whether the Dolphin Statement or the publicity of this
will end up with anything beyond administrative leave
once this gets pushed down the road, the lights go away,
the noise goes away, you throw it to the union,
the police union, and then people,
police officers have killed and gone back to work,
and this doesn't obviously go to that level.
I do understand how the police right now in this country
feel like they're under attack
That they feel that everyone's watching them and this without
Understanding how it is they do their job and we are all critics when they do it poorly and
There are times when they do it poorly that they die because they're in a really dangerous job
So they they have to be doing something.
We're all here to be the Monday morning quarterbacks
after they've done it wrong when,
if that tinted window goes up and then comes back down
and he's shot by somebody in a car,
we're not taking into account that their goal
at the end of the night
is to simply get home safely to their own families and Miami can make that
difficult. So I do understand once we start having these conversations about
race, why it is some people end up on the side of the police officers. I just don't
know how you can see what we all watch together and anyone in our audience
arrive at, yes, that's how police should do their job
if I were the one involved there.
I just don't think that, well, maybe if I were the one,
you would want police to do their job that way.
If it was specifically me in being pulled over.
But if it were you being pulled over, I don't think anyone would say that's how and
we've all have we all been talked to cops talk to by cops
that way because I certainly have on a number of times
before I've even said anything.
Oh, yeah, I've I've spoken to cops in a way that I'm not
proud of and yes cops have spoken to me in a way that's
demeaning of course,, for a traffic violation.
So it's an interesting, you know, did Tariq Hill,
I think the most damning thing about this whole thing, Dan,
is once they realize it's Tariq Hill,
you hear one of the cops drop an F-bomb, right?
Because they're like, oh man, this is bad for us.
This is gonna be a bad look for us.
As if they knew it was, if they knew it was to re-kill,
they would have treated that person differently.
That's pretty bad, no?
Yes, I mean, it doesn't rise to the level
of top five worst things about this.
No, but it's why I use your name all the time
when I get pulled over, I mean.
But it implies we do this often and nothing comes of it.
Oh shit, this one's gonna get out
This one's yeah this one
Let's immediately put someone on administrative leave before an investigation or anything because we all watch the video
Can we talk about the game because we have not we've spent three days here without talking about just about anything except Jason
Sanders as it relates to the game
I do want to talk about the game, but I just want to recap something you went to a dolphin game with your dad
And rooted for OJ Simpson. Yes. Wow, huh? Yeah, my father got the worst tickets. Nobody wanted the Bills tickets
They nobody at his office
The Bills were the worst team and they only had one good player
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D'Libretard! I may take it one step further
We haven't even gotten two guts
Wow! Oh my God!
What in spite of him!
Ho ho ho ho ho ho!
Oh wow!
I love you, Duke.
This is the Don Lebatar Show with the StuGats.
The biggest takeaway for this Dolphinscape for me
is that you're hearing all the reaction after the game
from players talking about Tua at halftime.
That it's a Tua they've never seen before.
Kind of along the lines of our interview with him.
He just seems to be a different guy.
Like apparently Tyreek was saying
that he heard his Hawaiian accent for the first time.
The way he was like laying into the team,
calling guys out specifically.
So, I mean, it's pretty clear that Tua is a different guy.
We'll see how it plays out, but he just is different.
He ended up being a different guy after halftime too,
because in the first half he was missing throws. He was going, but he just is different. He ended up being a different guy after halftime too,
because in the first half, he was missing throws,
he was going long, he was going short.
He didn't look like the two that we had seen
in the season prior, and then all of a sudden,
after halftime, he goes 12, 16, 200-something yards,
touchdown, he looks good.
So something happened there in between,
because in the first half, he didn't look good whatsoever.
Well, one of the things that I would say to you
makes this dolphin period, this era,
something that's more exciting
than anything that has existed in the years of the 2000s.
I'm not afraid of deficits.
Right.
That's super different.
Yes.
Like that's not, dolphins get down 20 to seven
almost for a decade and
I'm like there's not gonna be any rallying from this. Well I think fair to
say that fumble, the Holland punch fumble, that was the play of the game
because if that doesn't happen, touchdown. Jaguars are up what 24 to 7? Yeah game
over. Do we believe Javon Holland when he says, I was working on that all off season?
I do believe him.
Like, I just love it.
I feel like if fumbles are random,
the peanut tillman, he punched it.
No, that was a peanut punch.
That was a skilled...
I work on that at the office sometimes.
I mean, he said he was going in, he was desperate,
and that's what he works on doing in the off season.
That's what he was taught to do.
How cool is that?
If he's literally working on that all off season,
the biggest play of week one, and it literally works.
Everyone works on that.
Yes, and furthermore.
I don't.
Billy, I think you're the only one here that does.
No, ask Tony.
Tony, walk around and I'll just walk by,
and I'll try to punch the ball out.
Like, you guys don't do that.
If you see a friend walking around the ball,
you don't try to just knock the ball out
when you walk past him.
I feel like it's normal instinct behavior.
How often do you talk to him?
Maybe I'm just an NFL caliber defender.
Now that I'm thinking about it, he's right.
How often are your friends just carrying footballs around?
Like all the time?
They're in the office all the time.
Yeah. Really?
Yeah.
But if there is a friend carrying a ball around,
you always try to knock it out.
Always.
I can tell you, when you ask me how often
are they walking around carrying a ball around me,
not for long.
Put it on the pole, my brother loved to do that.
It was one of his favorite comedic devices,
but not with balls, with plates of food.
He would just.
That is funny.
Classic.
That's funnier, yeah.
Did he clean it up at least?
No.
Okay, well then.
Wait, so he'd like smack a plate of food out of your hand?
Yes, yes.
Or like a beverage?
That's good humor.
Yeah, it is.
He would also slap those out of my hand.
I often had good humor ice cream in my hand.
That's just looking out for you, yeah. A couple of things on all of this
that we're talking about.
One, it's legitimately funny to think of football
as already the kind of violent that it is.
And if you're not working on punching the ball out
all off season, you might be slightly less accurate
than hitting the ball.
So now we've just gotten to the place
where people are actively punching each other in football.
Just straight up punches because that's what we're doing now
in football.
And as it relates to the real confidence
that Tua has now, Stu gots,
I would say, Jess, 24-7,
I'm not eliminating the Dolphins anymore
from the ability to come back from 24-7, I'm not eliminating the Dolphins anymore from the ability to come back from 24-7.
I understand why anyone would view that as a game-changing play.
It was, but I've just, I've seen enough from this offense's ability.
It's a rare thing, Stugatz.
When Tom Brady is telling you again and again, and people are making fun of him ten hard ten yards is really hard to get and twenty yards is really hard to get
the dolphins have the rarest of things they've got a guy who can go eighty
like they've got a guy who can eliminate your mistakes by being that they've
to guys so they've got one guy who everyone in the league knows can go
eighty and then they have other guys that can also
that that can also do it it's just not something I've seen from this offense before and it makes me
understand why their quarterback would be that kind of confident. What makes Tariq so special
and so fun to watch is he could take your 10 yard pass and make it an 80 yard touchdown.
It doesn't have to be an 80 yard pass. He could take any pass and turn that thing into a touchdown
and Waddle did it too in that game.
They're great.
I mean, they're fun to watch.
And this game tomorrow is a big game.
I know it's week two, Dan, but this is a big game.
You have to win.
If you want this division, you have to win your home game
against Buffalo.
It's an early must win.
Yeah, it is.
For both teams, possibly.
Division could come down to one game,
and this could be that game
That's a big one, man
I'm gonna put it on the poll at lebatard show has there ever been a game to must win for both teams game in the history
of games
Because no is the answer to that not not yet
I mean until tomorrow ask that same question friday and you'll see very different results
Probably, I mean if we're doing predictions for tomorrow's game and we we just have to do this Not yet, until tomorrow. Ask that same question Friday and you'll see very different results probably.
I mean if we're doing predictions for tomorrow's game
and we just have to do this.
Oh wow.
Really?
That's right, it's time for Against the Friends.
And it's brought to Against the Spurs!
And it's brought to you by our friends at DraftKings. Stay tuned because you're gonna hear about all
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DraftKings, the crown is yours.
Jess, what do you got?
I've got bills at the Dolphins.
It's a two and a half point spread right now
for the home team, for the Dolphins.
Who you going with?
I'm going with the Dolphins.
Let's go!
Short week, they got to play at home last weekend.
Wow.
I think the offense got things going in the second,
specifically the fourth quarter,
I got end of the third, beginning of the fourth.
And I think that they're gonna win this one.
Oh, yes!
I got the surprise!
Billy, do you have any commentary
on Josh Allen's face before this game?
On his face?
I wouldn't have such a comment.
His stupid face, is his face gonna look stupid? What do you want? He buried the hatchet. I think he's due for an arm punt in this game on his face. Yeah, I wouldn't have his stupid, his stupid face. Is his face going to look stupid?
What do you bury the hatchet?
I think he's due for an arm punt in this game.
Really?
A couple.
I don't think he got him out of his system.
OK, Tony, what do you got?
I'm going opposite of just here.
I think it's a trap game for the Dolphins.
Small line, small line.
I think the Buffalo Bills are going to come in, run the ball
like they did against the Cardinals and win win outright, but I'm gonna get him
against the spread plus two and a half.
Billy, break our tie.
I love this.
One Bills, one Dolphins.
I am gonna go with the Buccaneers plus seven in Detroit.
I love that, I really do.
I feel like that line is crazy big in favor of the Lions the Lions won as we all know 26 to 20 against the Rams
But it took them to get to overtime to do it and they gave up a lot of yards
They gave up 387 yards of total offense 300 for passing yards to the Rams the Buccaneers as we know
How Baker Bayfield who may or may not have been the MVP of week one and may be leading the MVP race right now, Dan.
Sam Darnold. They beat the commanders commandingly,
37 to 20 this past week and Baker had
289 passing yards and four touchdowns and they had
392 total offensive yards. That's a lot of yards and the Lions just gave up a lot of yards.
I don't think that the Lions are gonna win by seven.
And that's against the Spurs.
Oh, God, that's right.
That's right.
Unbelievable research, I mean, oh my God.
I was kind of hoping, though,
that because we were talking about the Bills,
because he is named Billy, I thought we would get.
My fantasy team was once known the Buffalo Billies.
Did you know that?
Oh, I would have named him.
Why would I want to know that?
It's a fun fact. IES or YS?
No, YS. Fun fact about Sam
Darnold. According to Computer Cowboy
Ben Baldwin on Twitter
his adjusted EPA was the highest
in the NFL last year, which is
adjusted for pass protection, receiver
drops, dropped interceptions, lock on
interceptible passes, etc. etc. etc. So I think
you can say with confidence he was the
week one MVP. Sam Darnold?
I kind of agree this is a trap game.
I kind of do too, but I wanted to pick the dolphins.
I can't see the spread.
But why do you think it's a trap game?
It's a classic trap, all the groundwork is there.
Why isn't it a trap for both teams?
No, no, it's not such a thing as double trap week two,
that's crazy talk.
It's at night so they don't have the Sun advantage either. That's a great point by Jessica
It's still gonna be unbelievably swampy hot though
Yeah, but not for the whole game. Yeah, it should bring in some heaters. It will be swampy hot for the entire game
I promise you I'll bring the eaters
How is this a trap game for the Dolphins?
I don't understand how is a trap game for the Dolphins? I don't understand how it's a trap game for anybody.
Their next two games are against worse, less teams.
They're both very good teams.
I don't understand why it's a trap game.
It's Thursday, that's why.
It's a let your guard down game.
It's a Thursday game, it's not a let your guard down game.
The pills.
This guard is down, trust me.
It's a division rival, how can it be a let your guard down game?
No, how good the other team is.
No, no, literally their biggest rival.
Because they're thinking this is week two, we can take our foot off the pedal right now. I think the bills I think the bills. Oh wow. What about the Bucks? Well the Bucks we know nobody cares about the box. That's not true Dan
Fuck you
Baker Mayfield was fit than adjusted EPA. Did you see Bucky Irving?
The hell is adjusted EPA?
I love that. I love that. Bucky Irving I couldn't believe it.
I love that. I love that. Bucky Irving I couldn't believe it.
I love that. Bucky Irving I couldn't believe it. Bucky Irving I couldn't believe it.
I love that. Bucky Irving I couldn't believe it. Bucky Irving I couldn't believe it. I love that. Bucky Irving I EPA. Did you see Bucky Irving?
The hell is adjusted EPA?
My wife drafted Bucky Irving. I couldn't believe it.
I was like, who the hell is that?
What a game, Bucky Irving.
On the Bucks perfect fifth.
Exactly right.
The perfect marriage.
It's also the environmental production agency.
Imagine if the Dolphins picked some guy named Dolphy.
Everyone would love him. I will not imagine that. the Environmental Production Agency. Imagine if the Dolphins pick some guy named Dolphy.
Everyone would love him.
I will not imagine that.
Buffalo Billies.
I still don't understand why it's a trap game.
It's a good team name.
It's a terrible team name.
It's a really good team name.
It's a trap game.
No, it's a trap game.
I'll tell you why.
I'll tell you why.
They play the C-Hawks.
They play the T-Hawks.
No, they don't, you know.
They play the T-Hawks.
Stop talking.
It's allowed.
They play the Hawks again.
They play the P-Hawks. They play the P-Hawks. They play the P-Hawks. They play the P-Hawks again. No, no, no're good. No, they don't, you know. Listen, listen. Stop talking so loud. They play the Bills again. They play the Bills early.
No, no, no.
They play the Bills early again.
They're the two best opponents in the division.
No, no, no, no.
People still cry on the Jets.
Listen, they play the Bills this week.
It's literally the opposite of the Tricke.
Then they play the Seahawks, then the Titans,
Patriots, Colts, Cardinals, all winnable games.
Then they play the Bills again.
Oh wow.
So it's easy game, hard game, hard game.
They get them early this year.
Twice.
In Buffalo early though.
Yeah.
This could be that classic Greg Maddux type game
where one team lets the other team win
so they get overconfident
and then the next matchup in Buffalo,
they think this is gonna work
and then boom, it does not work.
Trap.
I feel like the Patriots is actually the Trap game.
This might be a late Trap game for the Trap game.
I'm obsessed. That's not a Trap game, that's a bait and switch game. This is actually the Trap Game. This might be a late Trap Game for the Trap Game. I'm just saying.
That's not a Trap Game.
That's a bait and switch game.
This is a late Trap Game.
That's a different thing.
That's the old switcheroo.
It's not a Trap Game.
It's not a Trap Game.
Shh.
Shh.
Shh.
Shh.
Shh.
Keep your voice down.
It's a library.
Jacoby Percet.
Shh.
Can anyone hear this?
That guy can win you a playoff game.
You've pushed him to self. Why did you bring up Jacoby Percet? Just because. We're forgetting the Mike White factor. I'm saying we have to be set. There's a lot of winnable games on this dolphin schedule, by the way.
We're forgetting the Mike White factor.
Oh yeah.
What's the Mike White factor?
He was signed by Buffalo to their practice squad.
Chris said that he should hold him out.
He has their playbook.
The Bills are going to know what's coming.
Because of Mike White.
Oh, a double agent game.
He's actually lying about the calls to the Bills so that he can help the Dolphins win.
He signs with the Bills, gives them fake plays.
He then proves to be useless.
They fire him, then he comes back to the Dolphins
with the Bills plays.
That's Mike White.
Next level.
Genius.
He hasn't been disavowed.
It was a faux disavowal.
He's our hometown kid.
Just like Ethan Hunt.
Big game for Jason Sanders.
Oh, no doubts.
If that guy misses a kick,
if that guy even hits the crossbar,
he needs to be cut immediately.
If he even looks at that crossbar,
I don't want nothing but net.
The back of the net.
How is he not supposed to look at the crossbar
when he lines up his head?
That's for him to figure it out.
He's had ample opportunities to not be missing kicks.
He hit a game winner. He said ample opportunities to not be missing kicks
Don't remember why we're whispering But I believe in them to come back
When they're down if they haven't been trapped by thinking that the bills aren't any good
Even though the bills have won the division
What's the difference by thinking that the Bills aren't any good even though the Bills have won the division. Not a Trap Game. Not a Trap Game.
Leave the Trap Game.
Trapties.
What's the difference between a Trap Game and a Trap Game?
You don't get it.
You don't get it.
Shh.
Shh.
You don't get it.
You know what?
I changed my mind.
It's a Trap Game.
See?
I told you.
I told you.
I told you.
Wait, so who do we have winning?
I don't remember.
The Bills.
Jacobi Percet. Yes. I had to be set. I had to be set. That's the real Trap Game too. Howdy folks, it is Mike Ryan and over the course of our 20 years together, there have
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