The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz - The Big Suey: My Voice Is Strong and My Bottom Is Fresh (feat. David Samson)
Episode Date: April 2, 2025Not only does David admit to causing someone else's divorce, but in a separate instance, Domonique expected him to CARE for a sports fan. Ha. Hahahaha. HAHAHAHAHA! Learn more about your ad choices. Vi...sit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Okay, flights on Air Canada. How about Prague?
Ooh, Paris. Those gardens.
Gardens. Um, Amsterdam. Tulip Festival.
I see your festival and raise you a carnival in Venice.
Or Bermuda has carnaval.
Ooh, colorful.
You want colorful. Thailand. Lantern Festival. Boom.
Book it. Um, how did we get to Thailand from Prague?
Oh, right. Prague.
Oh, boy.
Choose from a world of destinations.
If you can.
Air Canada. Nice travels.
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Welcome to the big suey presented by DraftKings.
Why are you listening to this show?
The podcast that seems very similar to the other Dan LeBattard podcast.
I'm sorry. I'm not going to apologize for that.
In fact, the only difference seems to be this imaging.
I have been tempted in restaurants just walking past tables to grab somebody's fries
if they're just there.
That hasn't happened to you guys?
I've done it.
And now, here's the marching man to nowhere,
fat face, and the habitual liar.
This segment is presented by LinkedIn jobs.
Post your job for free at LinkedIn.com slash DLS.
Terms and conditions apply.
We back and we are bringing in another teammate
to help us get this dub in game three,
the rubber match, the great David Sampson's in the building.
What up, David?
How are you?
I wish I were in the building.
Sadly, I'm just on a little square,
but my voice is strong and my bottom is fresh.
Okay.
There we go.
Love that you got a...
Flea flicker.
Everybody's putting it down, that's how we start.
I love it, man.
So there are a couple of things I wanna get to with you.
There's a game that I wanna play with you also.
So my social media algorithm has shown me recently
that a lot of wives and girlfriends are playing music
for their significant others
in hopes that they can clap on beat.
I feel like I'm looking around this whole thing
and I'm like, you know who I think would do a great job
of this is David Sampson.
So David, how are you musically? Are you, are you a, you have that type of rhythm?
I'm a big Jack Wagner fan. All I need is just a little more time to be sure how I feel.
Is it just in my mind?
It's incredible. It's outstanding.
The only other question that I have for you,
or not only other question,
there's one other question that's not on the list of things
that I wanted to talk to you about is,
have you ever seen or reviewed a Tyler Perry movie?
I have not reviewed it on the show and I I've seen two of them as my guests.
Wow, which ones?
How many Madeyas have there been?
Too many.
Madeyas?
Like seven?
What's Madeya?
Five?
I think he means Madea.
Oh!
Madea, Madea, Tomato, Tomato.
So you've seen a couple of them, which ones?
I think I've seen two.
Madea Goes to Prison? Was it? It's like saying I've seen a couple of them, which ones? I think I've seen two. Medea goes to prison?
Was it?
It's like saying I've seen a couple of Ernest movies.
Medea says do.
Right.
Or Fast and the Furious is.
Medea says.
Wasn't there?
Halloween or?
Yeah, wasn't there a Halloween one?
I don't know, I thought there was a Halloween one.
If you're listening or viewing this at home
and you're like, oh, Dominique's so funny, man.
He's just making up stuff. No, no, no.
That's a real one.
I believe that's a real one.
There are 11 listed Madea movies.
There's Diary of a Black Woman, which I guess
is where we were introduced to.
Mad Black Woman.
Yeah, where we were introduced to Madea.
Then Madea's family reunion, meet the Browns.
Madea goes to jail.
I can do bad all by myself.
Madea's big happy family.
Madea's witness protection.
Madea gets a job. A Madea Christmas big happy family, Madea's witness protection, Madea gets a job,
a Madea Christmas, boo, a Madea Halloween.
Gets a job!
Get a job!
One nothing Tyler.
Oh, good for him.
You can't get a movie made these days
and he got 11 of them done with the character.
Is that a more successful franchise
than what Eddie Murphy did with his, oh God.
I'm having a moment.
Nutty Professor.
Who's got the better, bigger franchise?
It's gotta be Tyler Perry.
I mean, Tyler Perry, counting dollars,
then yes, Tyler Perry.
For counting actual movies that people wanna watch,
I would say Eddie.
Yeah, I don't consider them the same category.
You know, I feel like they're playing different sports.
It's like, Tyler Perry is like producer, actor, guy,
and Eddie Murphy is like,
talent.
Yeah, one of the greatest movie stars
and comedians in the history of everything.
Maybe his franchise isn't the best,
but that tends to be the case,
is like the most profitable things
are not always the highest quality, right?
That is a very sad statement, but a very true statement.
And it comes on the heels of a Val Kilmer passed away last night.
And I was thinking about the Batman franchise.
And I was thinking about all the different actors who have played Batman and where Val sort of stands.
And is it because he was sick young and that becomes more sympathetic?
Are people gonna remember Batman Forever
as a better movie than it actually was?
I think about whether or not sort of early tragic death
changes people's reputation and the art that they made
and I think it really does often.
Let me tell you right now, it's not going to,
people are not gonna remember that movie kindly.
By the way, that was Cinephobe episode,
which one was it?
245, you can catch that wherever you catch podcasts.
Doing great here, man.
I would love, I don't know if I would've been
more impressed or happy or frustrated if David said
he's seen all the Madea movies.
I don't know how that makes you feel,
because I know that this from my galavant with Charlie,
his friend who is a well-to-do white
goes to see every Madea movie on opening night,
which my reaction to that is like, wait, why?
Like, wait, what do you, I mean, what's the-
There's an angle, what's your angle?
Like, you just appreciate the cinematic quality of it,
or you going, you laughing at or with Madea is my question.
You guys ever heard of a movie called White Man's Burden?
Yes.
It has John Travolten.
It's like the flip, right?
Reality Switch Sides is the tagline, right?
We also reviewed it for Cinepho, by the way.
But in the Reality Switch Sides universe,
where black people are the predominant culture or whatever,
if I heard a white guy say,
I go to watch Madea on opening night,
he's getting flagged, red flag,
you gotta bring him in.
What's the deal?
What are you up to, boy?
What's going on?
You into?
No.
Dave, David, did you see the clip of the Hawks fan
falling during the in arena tic-tac-toe
layup game last night.
Yeah, of course.
He tore his knee.
Well, perhaps.
A few weeks ago we were talking about
what you as the Marlins president would give fans
if they were injured on premises.
So what's this guy getting
if this is at one of your sporting events?
So this is a good example where you don't get to do this
unless you've signed a waiver, a specific liability waiver.
So we could get away with absolutely nothing,
but we'd probably give him a nice bag
on the way out the door, and that's about it.
But he is really up to himself.
He's got to show insurance
prior to doing an activity like that.
You don't just get, like when you have fans
running in the outfield, what's the one Atlanta does? The freeze.
The freeze.
The freeze.
When they have to beat the freeze,
can't you just picture the guys
like pulling a hammy or something?
So in order for that to work, you do sign something.
So no, I would just apologize to the guys,
say tough break and help them to the doctor.
When you say a bag, you don't mean of money.
You mean a bag of like a t-shirt and a hat.
That's exactly what I mean.
A t-shirt, a hat, a giveaway,
maybe throwing a bobble head, maybe an autographed ball.
If it's actually torn, I'd probably,
that's a torn ACL is probably an autographed ball.
If it's ACL, MCL, and meniscus, probably an autographed bat.
What if he throw the PCL in there too?
We get all of them.
Alphabet soup. Then you get to meet somebody.
If you tear the PCL also,
we'll take you down and we'll have a player visit you
on your way being wheeled into the ambulance.
So question, do you do the ligament test yourself
or do you take his word for it?
Because Billy is alleging that maybe he was embarrassed
that he kind of slipped and fell
and was sort of doing like, you know, the the grape lady like,
Yeah, you just grab your knees to save face a little bit like, oh, that poor guy, he got
hurt, he can't continue. It's really just embarrassment.
Yeah, you need the MRI results. This is not based on the honor system.
Now I just want to hear the grape lady. But David,
I feel bad because I don't think she was faking it. It's just the sound. David, is there, so there's no circumstance
where you would not just take care of this guy?
Like I'm looking at-
Take care?
I'm looking at, if you tear-
Like do the surgery?
No, not use yourself, but pay for it.
Take care?
No, no, no, no, no, no.
I mean, take care of his knee.
Like there's no circumstance,
because you have this waiver protection,
there's no circumstances where because you have this waiver protection,
there's no circumstances where you would waive the waiver
and recognize that, all right,
this guy is in such bad condition
and is so unfortunate that we are going to at least
take care of your surgery and rehab, right?
What the hell are you talking about?
I literally don't understand the words you're saying,
but it must be me.
I don't know if I have a bad connection.
I think I hear you right, but Dominique, no.
There is not a scenario under which we would pay
for the surgery of someone who gets hit or hurt
during an on-field game that we would play in between it.
Okay, so there's a couple of reasons why I would push back
and think that it would be worth considering.
One is goodwill with your fan base,
which maybe you don't care about.
And two is long-term protection against when this guy
can't afford to pay for his own surgery
because he doesn't have insurance
and his whole life and family falls apart.
10 years from now, there's a big expose
about how David Sampson had a waiver in his face rather
than help him out like I I would think that the $20,000 or whatever it would
cost on the front end to get somebody right will be worth protecting yourself
because you know what's not gonna matter your stupid ass waiver we're saying hey
hey I understand that his life has fallen apart and he is now without home
but don't worry don't worry we now without home. But don't worry, don't worry.
We were legally protected guys, right?
Don't you, you have any fear of that?
No, and Dominique, I would encourage you.
I understand what you're saying,
but I would like you to find one,
you try to make me out as the only team president
who acted this way.
Find another team that does that
when there's an injury to a fan,
whether it's a foul ball or someone slips and falls,
you may do a settlement for a lawsuit.
We talked about that on a recent show.
But paying for the surgery?
Find me one other team that does that.
Give me, oh sorry.
No, I'm just gonna say the waivers.
This is standard practice across all sports,
across all arenas.
I worked, my first job in NBA was Game Ops.
And so we were the people that had to pick these people
from the crowd to do these things.
And the first thing you do is you hand them
a piece of paper, you gotta sign this.
It says, anything happens out here, you're on your own.
I feel like you probably picked people
in the hopes that they would do something funny.
They were all, I don't think you were out there
looking for athletes.
Oh no, it's all about, you know what it was mostly about
is making sure the two were equal.
Like you didn't want like one person was like doing
Windmills and the other one was doing that right all right. Let's lift the spirits. Give me some grape lady Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, like they're squashing grapes under their feet. Making wine. And then she says something to the effect of,
okay, let's race.
And then she says stop, but then she keeps going.
Right, like they were like, all right, let's stop.
Oh, psych, I didn't even want to stop it.
And that's when she falls and busts her ass.
She's on a platform too.
It's not just busting grapes on the ground.
For whatever reason, they had to elevate.
Apparently she broke a couple ribs.
Did she?
It sounds like it. She stays out of the spotlight now. I can, ow, ow. Apparently she broke a couple ribs. Did she? It sounds like it.
She stays out of the spotlight now.
I can't breathe.
Stop.
But this was 2006.
This is one of the early YouTube viral videos.
E-bombs world.
No, I think she is.
Yeah, she's hurt.
She took a hard fall off there.
It was her and the guy who got the fly
that flew in his mouth.
Oh, yeah, where he went from being a news guy
to being our uncle.
This country-ass shit. By the way, Dominique, I suggest if you and Taylor Oh, yeah, yeah where he went from being a news guy to being this country
Dominique I
Suggest if you and Taylor do some sort of race do not sign any metal
David will try to slide you on
Any waivers, you know what? I I think Billy can you somehow find my guy that's behind
Taylor in that race Jason. Yeah, Jason Jason, Mason. Okay, that was the guy
On what if they will get to that in a second David? I do I respect you in your sport of baseball
There's the picture of Taylor. So find that guy. Yeah, hey Billy Gill
Can get you Taylor I want no not Yeah, hey Billy Gill. What is this, Google
I got a question for you or I do want to give you an opportunity to discuss the torpedo
bats like I feel like we've been all over the place.
I'm not a fan of the torpedo bat.
Lots of people are fans.
I'm confused why every player doesn't have a torpedo bat right now.
What are your thoughts on the torpedo bat in MLB right now, David? So let's start with why every player doesn't have a torpedo bat right now. What are your thoughts on the torpedo bat in MLB right now, David?
So let's start with why every player doesn't have one.
Bats, I'm trying to think of the football equivalent
to a piece of equipment that you use that is so personal,
it's so based on feel,
and that there are major differences between bats,
both in length, all within,
it could be shoes for a football player.
In the NBA?
Shoes too. In the NBA, I can't think of anything,
maybe how you tape your legs or how you tape your ankles
or the shoes that you wear, the sneakers,
why everybody doesn't wear full high tops is funny to me
because it can help protect the ankle.
But in bats to me, the only equivalent I can think of
is a golf club, where golfers have a certain feel
of what clubs they like.
In, if you talk to a baseball player,
a bat is second most personal item to their glove.
But a bat is how you make your money.
And what the torpedo bat is, it's not new at all.
Players have been using it.
Non-Yankees have been using it, including last year.
But what it does is it gives you analytically
a better chance to have hard contact
when you hit the ball where you're supposed to hit it.
It doesn't mean that it's the right configuration
for every player because when a player holds a bat,
and I've spoken, Ichiro's a great person to talk to.
He treats his bats like their family.
He wasn't allowed, we were not allowed.
Part of the deal with Ichiro is we weren't allowed
to travel his bats with the other equipment
because there's a bat case that all the bats go in.
His bats were totally in a separate case,
totally separate, never to be lost
and never to be touched by anyone, by the way.
And it's a feel that you have not just at the bottom,
but it's the weight and how the weight's distributed.
And what the torpedo bats do is they distribute
the weight differently and some players just don't want that.
So it really is a personal choice.
Wait, hold on.
You got each hero's bat sitting in first class
and watching the other bats go behind
as it chips champagne like, oh, peasants.
Oh, those bats.
The other bats are not in first class,
they're not in coach, they're in steerage.
So where is the Ichiro's bat?
They are shoved onto the plane in a way
that would make your eyes water.
But Ichiro's bats were special.
They're down there dancing?
Like us at Dan's wedding, remember that?
That's a callback.
At Dan's wedding, for those who don't know,
Dan's wedding, there was like two sections.
There was like the hoity-toity section.
That's where Dan Patrick and Sarah Spayne
and Mina Kahn's at Poblatorio hanging out.
And then there was the Titanic section.
There was me, Chris, and Billy.
And Ryan Cortez.
And Ryan Cortez.
Is it true that E.T. Row kept his bat in like a humidor?
So when you say humidor, I associate that with a mechanism
inside that does something with temperature.
Is that accurate?
Yeah, so it's not a humidor.
It was just, it was a protective case
that very much would not let them touch any other bat,
would not let them touch each other.
They were very much separated.
Wow, bat segregation.
I don't know how I feel about that. No touching. they were very much separated. Wow, that's a little bit of bad segregation.
I don't know how I feel about that.
No touching!
All right, Charlie, I think you got something for me, right?
Yeah, we're doing a little bit of research.
We're doing a little bit of research.
David, was there an issue when you were at the Marlins
of shooting a T-shirt gun that hit a woman in the head
that you guys got sued over?
Would you care to comment? Oh.
Does this sound familiar?
I would say I wouldn't comment, only in that,
that would be one of scores of lawsuits
that every team gets, standard.
We ended up not being able to shoot, like,
hard things like hot dogs too high.
It's why when you go to a game, it stinks.
Only the people with good seeds tend to get stuff these days
because we were told by lawyers,
don't shoot stuff into the upper decks.
Not that we had the upper deck open all that often,
but don't shoot stuff too deep
because you could end up hurting someone.
Did someone get hit by a t-shirt?
I sort of remember that, but it didn't matter enough to me.
I'm gonna say maybe that's a 10K issue at best.
So no bag with no T-shirt, no hat.
No, that would know,
because once the lawsuit comes in,
then there's no conversation at all,
except with the lawyers,
and then you're just talking settlement.
How often would you guys get sued a year
for stuff like that?
Because this past weekend, I was at Disney,
and I was sitting down eating,
I was like, man, there are hundreds of thousands of people here, they must get sued a year for stuff like that? Because like this past weekend, I was at Disney and I was sitting down eating, I was like,
man, there are like hundreds of thousands of people here.
They must get sued a hundred times a day
by someone for something stupid.
I think that's too many, but I would say
over the course of a year, at least 10 every year,
it's not a hundred a day, but at least 10.
And that's actual filing of suits related to things that happen in the stands.
There's all sorts of other lawsuits that happen just during the course of a business.
And we weren't the only team you sue your corporate sponsors when they don't pay
or your season ticket holders when they don't pay.
Every team does that as well.
But you're talking about slip and fall cases specifically.
I would say 10 most frivolous one that you've received or that you remember.
I mean, to me, remember my perspective, I find them all to be frivolous.
But I think the most frivolous lawsuit I ever saw is when we were blamed in the for the
divorce of a couple.
There you go.
And the argument was that the wife was flirting with players and managers
down near the dugout and that caused the divorce.
And so we were sued and we were blamed
for the dissolution of the marriage.
So was the argument where your players were too handsome,
your players were too approachable,
your players were too flirtatious,
like just existing is not, I would think,
enough to put in a legal argument, right?
Oh, you can put anything in a legal argument, of course.
But yes, this was an interesting one.
I actually got served personally for this one,
being blamed for having introduced the woman
to a player or a manager
that then led to some nefarious activity
that then led to the dissolution of the marriage.
Of course I had no recollection
and of course that's not actionable.
Of course that's ridiculous.
So of course it was dismissed summarily immediately.
I never appeared, never testified.
I only had to do one or two depositions on it.
But it is crazy to me that you could blame a third
party it's like blaming a bartender for your slump buster it just doesn't really make sense to me
wait so was there more to this relationship than just like the introduction so allegedly there was
uh an introduction that led to things that happen after people are introduced.
I mean not every time people are introduced.
Weather is starting to warm up.
Regular season is starting to wind down.
Games of consequence in sports starting to ramp up.
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Woohoo!
Don Lebatard.
Tate-as.
Stugats.
Tate-as.
This is the Don Lebatard Show with the Stugats. David, those of us that aren't familiar, what is a Slump Buster?
Nope.
I don't want to talk about that.
Play some music before we see if David can clap, guys.
Let's play a little music. Over Zoom, you feel good about this, Dom?
Does he know what a beat is?
I feel like he's giving us multiple claps to catch multiple.
There's one tempo, like get the tempo.
Maybe there's a delay.
Four claps?
That's not a clap.
Either way, whether it's a delay or not,
this is not on beat.
On beat has to be.
It's on beat in my ear, Donnie.
That's the only answer.
That's all we needed, buddy.
That's the only answer you could ever get.
That's all we needed, buddy.
All right, I wanna get back to this, the...
The posters?
Nope, I do not wanna talk about that.
You nailed it.
Good job, David, you won. But I do wanna get want to talk about that. You nailed it, good job David, you won.
But I do want to get back to the idea that,
so you introduced these people.
So they weren't just like regular fans, right?
You didn't just, these were hody-toity-well-to-do people.
I have no recollection, your honor.
Ooh.
I do not know of what you speak.
Ooh, hold on now. Do you speak. Oh, hold on now.
Do you know how many times, hold on.
This is insane that you're, Dominique,
you of all people in this room,
if you wanted to meet someone in the stands,
do you agree that there's someone in your clubhouse
or in your organization who could effectuate such meeting?
This is, this is again, last time we were on together,
you were awesome, you're the MVP of that week,
and it was great, but I remember saying this to you then
also, is football is very different from basketball
and baseball, we don't have that,
like that's just not a thing.
The, what?
No, where you, so like, if you've ever been on a football
field, it's not quite, yeah I know how you guys are,
you guys are on the road, you play 100 games,
and the fans are much closer, and there's time to look around, that's not quite, yeah, I know how you guys are. You guys are on the road, you play 100 games, and the fans are much closer,
and there's time to look around.
That's not how football works.
It's so rare for a football player
to be in one of the 16 games of the year
to look around and say,
oh, where's the baddie section there?
There's a baddie, go get him.
I know this happens, but it doesn't happen in football.
Hold on, you're on the sideline.
You're telling me there's no, there's no like, huh?
Like that never happens, not you specifically.
No, I know what you're saying.
It's rare if it happens, like football.
Guys are locked in on the game.
Yeah.
I'm not buying it, I mean.
Okay, y'all don't have to buy it.
I imagine that there is a time when it's happened,
but generally the fans are not as close,
the weather is not as nice,
and you aren't in, we have fewer games,
there's more locked in.
So of all the players,
and there are only a couple of players
who have that level of pull,
like most of the guys on a football roster
are trying to stay on the roster.
They're not looking up to see what they're gonna do tonight.
We fly into a city, you have dinner, you have a curfew,
you go win the game, you get on a plane, and you fly out.
I'm trying to explain to you guys
that it's very different from what you guys do,
where you go to a city, you hang around, you play a game,
you got another game a night later,
you come back to that city in two weeks.
It's a whole different, you got 82 games,
or 100, what you got 160 some games?
I'll sell like a bunch of-
162, 81 on the road.
Right.
Like a bunch of nerds, man.
We are, football players are nerds,
that's why people like us.
Did the guy renew his season tickets the next season?
They did not renew after the divorce.
The thing that we do have-
Did the players stay on the team?
Yet, no, but not for that reason.
Wow, so it's all for not.
We do have, where we do have a little bit
of this type of behavior is in seating charts.
It's like.
On the plane?
No, not on the plane, in the stadium.
Oh, well you gotta make sure the family section
is different from the jump hole section.
Yeah, I mean I'm sure that you guys are aware of that
and also the wrist ball section. Yeah, I mean, I'm sure that you guys are aware of that. And also, the wristbands.
To get into, there's like a family room
or like an area, a backstage sort of area
where you go to if you need a break or to get some food
or to meet the players after the game.
That's a big thing.
And that's where we've had a couple fights
where someone gave someone else a wristband.
So like- Later of the week? In a city, there are obviously some people a couple fights where someone gave someone else a wristband.
So like in a city, there are obviously some people who frequent the clubs and parties
and there was someone who was friends with multiple people on the team and they let them
into the family room, created a beef.
You guys never have that conversation at the beginning of the year?
I think it was, no.
No, I'm like, I'm telling you, as an organization, David,
I'm sure you guys had this too.
It's like, you get this many family room credentials.
This is for family.
This isn't for another one.
You have that conversation.
But if you are new to the city and you meet someone
that you like and she becomes your girlfriend
and you give her a wristband to get into the family
and friends, you did not know that maybe she was someone
else's friend at some point.
And then they get into the room and then there's some issue
because the wife is like, what's this person doing here?
It's a mess.
So you're only talking about home games then
because on the road you said there's no time to meet
anybody because you have dinner, curfew,, because on the road you said there's no time to meet anybody because you have dinner,
curfew, play, win the game you said.
Yeah. Yeah.
And then fly out.
So you mean the home games.
Speaking of these type of things,
you think Zion Williamson is a bust?
Oh, I think that I've been talking about that
on Nothing Personal for years now.
How, no, I don't care how good you are
when you're on the court.
If you're only on the court 30 games a year,
you can't be considered a successful player. Now, would I rather have John Morant or Zion? I've said
from the beginning, I'd rather have John Morant and that's given all of his off court issues.
Frankly, I'd probably rather go E, none of the above, but Zion's out of chances for me.
They gave him that huge max deal, I mean, which made me crazy, a total waste because every year with him, it is something
and they just shut him down now and you're gonna say,
oh, it's for tanking, there's nothing to play for.
No, I wanna see that guy actually play and perform,
not have him sit the way he always does.
I think Zion Williamson is a clear bust.
You're so angry about it though.
Like that's the thing that-
I want players to play.
Well Zion is the lightest that he's been since college.
It appears that the injuries,
some of them I guess you could argue about his fault.
And you said even taking along jazz off court issues,
I think you could argue that Zion has some off court
concerns that could get in the way also.
But I guess I'm just surprised and shocked,
but it reiterates how valuable players of this level of talent are in the NBA
Zion is like though is the toughest kind of case study because he is good
Yeah, like if he wasn't good, this would be an easy conversation his contract
as you know David is has
Provisions that are not common in the NBA in terms of a level of
non-guarantee, a level of guarantee only if he hits weight and plays a certain
number of games that like for next year it's 40% guaranteed had he stayed at a
certain amount of weight and played at least 41 games, right? It's another 20%
guarantee if he plays at least 51 games, right? So that's already a level of contract
that we'd never see in our league, right?
So you could say, man, this guy's always hurt
and he's always out of shape.
We should cut him because we've got all this protection
in the contract that basically allows us
to walk away scot-free.
The problem is he's good and you know it.
And you know if it ever comes together,
like in terms of just staying healthy,
he's gonna kill it somewhere else,
and then you gotta explain to ownership
how you let this guy just walk.
The John Morant one is different
because beyond his off-the-court issues,
which seem to be behind him at this stage,
he also gets hurt a lot.
Not as much as Zion,
but he's hardly a vision of health himself.
And so both of those guys, and I would throw Joel and Bede in there in the conversation
as well, it gets you into real murky waters because you know when they're healthy, they
are elite.
But the problem is when they're healthy, that part is not a guarantee.
Teams are scattered.
The sports world is scattered by players who have this intoxicating level of skill
that when they're on the field, it's just so good.
It's like poetry, except they get hurt all the time.
And at some point you just realize
that's what you have here.
You have great skill.
Sometimes you say great skill, no head,
and you need both a head and skill
to succeed at the big league level
or at the professional level.
Sometimes you have a great head
and that overcomes not perfect skill.
But the hardest thing, as you pointed out,
is admitting to yourself when it's time to move on.
And one of the lessons you learn at GM and president school
is you're not gonna get everyone right.
And I'd rather be wrong early than right late.
And Zion is a case for me where I don't wanna throw
any more good money after bad.
I wanna move on from him and reallocate my resources,
start again, and if he ends up being healthy and good
for 10 more years after this with someone else,
that just counts as one of the bad, but I'd like my chances.
David, how much does job security factor
into that decision-making?
So it's why we like signing our GMs to long-term deals
because we didn't like GMs no matter what you say.
It's a normal reaction that you don't think
about five years from now if you're not gonna be there
five years from now.
And if you're on the last year of your deal,
which is what the Yankees do,
they never extend people until their contract runs out
and they hope that people are loyal enough
to think about the future that may not benefit them.
I have found that that is a rare trait
for employees or presidents to have.
It is totally normal to think about yourself
and to act in your self-interest.
It's actually expected at certain levels
of the corporate ladder.
And so having people, that's why you give stock options
and stock to people of public companies
because it's in the best interest of everyone
for the stock to go up.
In sports, it's really hard.
So we tried to ameliorate that by doing longer term deals.
And you don't want to get into a moral hazard situation.
I wanted to run something by you.
I never quite got to any of my solves for tanking
because Amin was convinced that tanking isn't even an issue.
But from a team president standpoint,
I want to throw a couple solutions at you.
One of the ideas that was floated
that isn't my solution but I would be on board
is to have, rather than a draft, to have free agency.
So anyone who's coming in, you could have,
you could put together a contract offer for a player
who is a rookie in order to add that player to your team
rather than to have the draft.
One of the other solutions is to flatten the lottery odds
for everyone who misses the playoffs.
And then there was another solution
that I thought was interesting
that was to do what the WNBA does
and have the record over the course of two years
determine who is going to be,
who's gonna have the top pick.
Are any of those more or less attractive to you?
Well, a lot of those exist.
Go back to Patrick Ewing's lottery,
and maybe I'm wrong,
but I think everybody had the same odds,
because it was your logo in an envelope in a jar.
I think everyone was equal there.
In baseball under the new CBA, you cannot get the top pick
multiple years in a row.
But let's talk about what you're saying about tanking
and the reason for it.
Everyone talks about tanking and the reason for it.
Everyone talks about tanking for a player.
And I don't believe that as a front office,
we ever did that in baseball.
It's really hard to because you're one, one overall.
It's still only a 50% chance of hitting.
But I've thought about it in basketball.
And when it's a straight line
where you have the worst record, you have the top pick,
tanking for that absolutely makes sense.
But if they've changed it the way they did in the NBA where you're not guaranteed that,
then taking all of a sudden doesn't increase anything but your number of ping pong balls.
And that has proven not to be as important as what we're seeing now with Philly that
you were discussing, which is protecting a pick period.
So what I would propose to do is to disallow any trades
of first round picks that are protected.
When you make a trade and you're willing to trade
your first round pick, you're throwing caution to the wind.
It may be the number one pick.
It may be the number 30 pick.
It doesn't matter because what protection does
is it actually incentivizes a team on the edge
to make sure that they no longer on that edge.
And I think that's a big problem.
Might be the first time I've ever agreed with you
on anything, David.
See, that's who you got.
You gotta watch who your betfellows are.
Good job, David, good answer.
Yeah, I like this betfellow.
You don't like that as an idea?
No, I like protections.
I like the idea of betting people's futures.
I like the idea.
Well, you can still bet the future without the protection.
I know, but I like the added complexity
of how sure are you on this bet?
When it turns into protections,
we're basically giving shades of gray
to what would be a black or white issue.
When I was talking earlier about any type of tweaks,
and I've been a part of a couple of CBA negotiations,
and everything that you put into,
every rule that you put into the next CBA
always has some knock-on effect
that was not what you anticipated.
Called unintended consequence.
Unintended consequence, yeah.
And that's always,
you always think that you're going to solve this problem.
I think the NBA is an example of it,
in that they put in
the max salary because they were like,
all right, we need to make sure that more money
goes to the lower players.
No, it wasn't because of that.
It wasn't about distribution.
It was about, Kevin Garnett's got how much?
No, these salaries out of control.
And they thought this will get salaries in line.
And what ended up happening was it just redistributed the money
to create this massive middle class.
So in the beginning, it was the owners
who wanted max salaries and the players were like,
absolutely not because the players association
was led by Patrick Ewing and like David Falk
and all the big money guys, right?
And now it's flipped where it's like,
the owner's like, why do we have max salaries?
And the players are like, no, we need them.
The unintended consequence of the max salary,
and Charlie talks about this very often as a Wizards fan,
and anyone who's a fan of a team that doesn't have one
of those top 15 guys, every team kind of
has to give someone the max.
And then you give the max to a guy who's not a top tier guy,
and then your team, you can't build a competitor.
And if you don't give a max to your top tier guy, he leaves.
So that's one of the knock on effects of the guaranteed or the max salary is it impacts
the rosters in that way.
So I think whenever we make any of these proposals, you have to be aware of the knock on effects.
So I threw a couple out there that I did not agree with.
David, you open your mouth to say something.
Yeah, I just want to say that I wish you worked
for MLB's union because you threw one out there
that I don't know if you meant,
but you were calling for immediate free agency
and the elimination of the draft.
Amen.
We propose that always.
Immediate free agency, permanent free agency,
every single year, no problem.
And the union said, no thank you.
Because they did not want that for their players.
That's a whole nother conversation, which I didn't want to get into specifically.
Free agency, you still have contracts.
It's not free agent every year.
You sign a contract for however long you determine the contract is going to be for.
But the solve that I wanted to throw at you for tanking, and you specifically, is the
reason why I think a lot of these tanking solves don't work is because we're looking
to disincentivize teams from losing.
And I think that not only do we have to do that, but we have to incentivize them to win.
So my argument would be that, particularly because you're impacting the entertainment quality of the game by putting
trash lineups on the floor, that the top eight teams in every conference that make the playoffs,
top 16 teams in the league, get one distribution, one level of distribution of the TV money.
Then all the teams after that who do not make it in, you get a tiered lower
level of revenue distribution based on where you rank. Because then you also are incentivized
and it does not, I can't foresee any knock-on effects that will be a problem for roster
construction going forward. And it holds the team accountable
and incentivizes them to put their best product
on the floor.
If you want to get your top distribution,
get in the damn playoffs.
If you don't, go ahead and lose.
You won't get one vote for that.
You won't even get the Dodgers to vote for that.
Because at the end of the day,
every league is 500 at the end of every season.
And so there's gonna be teams that miss the playoffs
and even the Yankees from time to time
will miss the playoffs and there's no way
they're gonna take a smaller cut of their TV revenue.
It impacts valuation and cash flow.
It impacts budgeting.
You wouldn't get one vote out of 30 teams.
You'll get a couple votes.
You probably wouldn't get enough to get it passed,
but it's the most infuriating thing.
I'm gonna let you go after this,
but one of the most infuriating things. I'm gonna let you go after this, but one of the most infuriating things
about pro sports owners is how much they love capitalism
until you try to apply to them.
You all exist in this cartel, a closed ecosystem,
where no matter how bad your restaurant is,
you're still going to turn a profit.
No matter how broken your McFlurry machine is,
no matter how trash your burgers are.
Somebody hurt you, Dalek.
You can't, yeah.
Somebody hurt you badly, and I'm sorry for that.
My guess is the NFL owner.
Hold on, hold on, David.
Don't you misdirect.
Yes, I've been hurting my life.
Doesn't change the fact that you assholes
exist in a system where you get to,
no matter what you produce, go ahead and cash in, and I wish we were in a system where you get to no matter what you produce, go ahead and cash in.
And I wish we were in a situation where the franchise, the freeloading franchises would
have to compete in a way that forced them to put the best product on the field.
And you don't get to just show up and be trash and get a big chunk of cash.
It's amazing, Dominique, how many players want to be owners.
Relegate them.
It's amazing. Relegate them. I don't want to talk owners? It's amazing how many players want to be owners.
I don't want to talk to you anymore. You're out of here!
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