The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz - The Big Suey: Unless You're Tryna Hold It Down
Episode Date: February 14, 2024David Samson sticks around to entertain a 2003 World Series hypothetical relating to his Travis Kelce criticism. He also talks MLB uniforms and seam-seamst-seamstre-uh-seamsters. Then, when does love ...die? Our crew has a long conversation about Valentine's Day, giving gifts, and...holding it down. Plus, Jason Kelce parties through Vegas with Taylor Swift and his brother, Billy dismisses Jeff Goldblum, and John Reed delivers a Valentine's Day song. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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You're listening to DraftKings Network.
Welcome to the Big Sui, presented by DraftKings.
Why are you listening to this show?
The podcast that seems very similar to the other Dan LeBatard podcast.
I'm sorry, I'm not going to apologize for that.
In fact, the only difference seems to be this imaging.
I have been tempted in restaurants
just walking past tables to grab somebody's fries
if they're just there.
That hasn't happened to you guys?
I've done it.
And now, here's the marching man to nowhere,
fat face and the habitual liar.
I am going to apologize about 30 minutes too late
to the audio only audience for that 30 seconds
of Jaylen Brown, Duncan Robinson, trash talk.
That didn't sound like anything.
Because there was no sound.
Because it was mostly subtitles.
And in so doing, I may lose a portion
of the audio audience again here
as I show again for the second
day one of my favorite videos Pedro Martinez fighting with Don Zimmer and Don Zimmer rolls out
forehead first to fight with Pedro. Pedro got into a lot of controversy where Mike says that race
is involved because that Dominican young man threw him down to the floor by his ears.
The lovable bald Don Zimmer announced
to God's has Jack McKeon in a fight
because David Samson, I want to address this
very quickly with you, David.
You are saying flatly, you're not saying you would,
but you're saying some sort of discipline
to show who's in charge,
but not enough discipline to actually cost myself the game.
That's the tight rope that I'm willing to walk.
Okay, but you walked your position back some because benching him for the game would be
even more badass and show who's in charge all the more, but would be even dumber than
having a coach not know the rules in a Super Bowl.
You said it during a Super Bowl or a World Series game.
For a regular season game, it's not even a question.
If Kelsey does that and I don't mean throwing of the helmet, I'm talking about physically touching
the coach, he's gone for the game at least.
But David, going back to your O3 team
that won the World Series, if Beckett during the World Series
touches Jack McKeehan, he's not coming out.
You're not taking him out, Jack's not taking him out.
Brad Penny, different story.
You would skip a start for Penny
with a smile on your face.
Wait, no! Penny was good in O3. skip a start for Penny with a smile on your face. You had play, no.
Penny was good in O3.
Wow, wow, Penny was good.
Really good for those of you who may not remember.
So the answer is you have to.
We had conversations like this
because we had to have it about Hanley Ramirez
who was really a problem for us in the clubhouse
and we had to figure out what to do with him.
And one of the things we did was bench him. And one of the things we did was bench him.
And one of the things we did with Pudge
when he disappeared during O3,
and then he reappeared, Jack said to us,
and we agreed, I'm not playing him.
And Jeffrey said, you've gotta play him,
we wanna win these games.
And Jack said, if you really wanna win as a team,
you've gotta show the rest of the team
that you're not gonna let the superstar dictate the terms.
Travis Kelsey, is he a first ballot hall of famer maybe?
But he is way more,
if you don't think that he's more in the news.
Don't diminish Kelsey's credentials here.
First ballot hall of famer.
So first ballot hall of famer,
do you agree that he is more in the spotlight
because of his relationship right now?
Yeah. Yeah, naturally.
Okay, therefore there is a different standard you're putting on what
happened during that Super Bowl because it was the Super Bowl
and because it was Travis Kelsey. And Mike's not wrong. If
that had been a different player, if that had been a black
player who had done that, and the and there had been some sort
of ramification for that, we're having a totally different
discussion. And I would like to have the discussion based on how
you don't lose your clubhouse.
And again, CBS didn't show us.
Do we know for sure that Travis Kelsey
didn't sit for a series?
I don't know the answer to that.
I feel like it would have been pointed out, but either way.
Nothing was pointed out.
It was left, it was left, nothing was said.
That's a kind of capital that Travis Kelsey has bought
with people because of his career
I want to switch gears
quickly because I want to get your opinion on whether or not Nike's gonna have to do a uniform recall because
players really upset that the customizable options on pants are gone and
consumers of people that love to buy MLB merchandise if you've seen the new uniforms and will throw some
MLB merchandise. If you've seen the new uniforms and will throw some comparisons between last years on the left and this year's on the right, these new MLB uniforms look really cheap, really
cheap. And I think that the reaction to this has been so toxic that we might actually see
uniforms being pulled this year. David, what is your take on the new uniform controversy?
So you're catching me a little bit and we're live,
so I think I'm right, but someone can do a fact check
with the 40 people working there.
Fanatics does the uniforms.
Fanatics does the-
And then licensed the Nike swoosh to put on them.
Correct, and every-
I don't believe they're manufactured by Nike.
So everybody wanted to take the opportunity to jump down fanatics throw because fanatics is a
Very polarizing entity, but the specs were provided by Nike
Darren Ravel is done reporting on this even a Twitter account by the name of fanatics suck which exists
Because they want to slam dunk every day of making fun of fanatics.
They put the blame over on Nike
because Nike provides these specs
and it doesn't matter who manufactures it,
they're just following the lead from Nike.
Yes, they are licensing the swoosh,
but the design, everything was provided by Nike.
So this is all done over a year in advance.
It's all gets approved, it all gets manufactured
and the specs get given to the licensees who then make the uniforms.
There is zero chance that all the uniforms will be pulled
and new uniforms will be made and then sent to all the teams
prior to the regular season.
These will be the uniforms.
I draw your attention to when the Marlins switch uniforms,
everyone complains.
When every team switches uniforms,
the majority of people are negative
and you just get through it.
So I don't think there will be any change
because what do you do with all these uniforms?
MLB is not gonna eat it, Fanatics is not gonna eat it.
And so you're left with this inventory
and they're not gonna write it off.
I hear you, although I feel pretty strongly now
that I should put some action on these uniforms
being recalled because of your passion here
But the players are coming out and saying these are bad
It's one thing if no one cares if something it doesn't carry any additional weight if the players are complaining about it
No, would you agree that it looks terrible?
Huh, I would agree that I couldn't read the names on the back of the Marlins uniforms
But those got approved by everybody and now they're changed. I understand from your first segment, I hadn't seen them, but that's
outstanding that they're now changed.
Do I think that they look worse this year?
I personally do, but big part of the uniforms, I haven't felt them yet.
And the players are very concerned about how they feel, what sort of the wicking
is, and then sizing, because some players, when we go through sizing
with new players, this is a funny little story
if you have a minute.
We spend time with players who we acquire,
figuring out what size they like.
Do they like their pants to be tight?
Like Stanton always would have special issued undershirts
that he would do his interviews in that were so tight
that he would wear my size.
Right, but one of the chief complaints here, David, one of the chief complaints here is
that those customizable options aren't afforded to players now.
So they are because what you do is we have seamstress, seamstress, seamstress.
Whoa, that was a glitch.
I want to say seamstress and just make it.
You got it.
A real glitch in the system there.
There, it's okay.
Seamstresses?
Yes, there you go.
We have to play that back.
Seamstresses are only women because ours are men.
So I didn't know whether it was a seamstur.
Is it a tailor?
You can say kitman.
It is a kitman. We have a bunch of people in the clubhouse
who are altering uniforms all the time.
So I'm not worried about players not having the size they want.
You don't care at all what the players think
about anything in this scenario.
Like the players.
About uniforms?
No.
The players.
Well, but I mean, this is deeply personal though, David.
They're playing for eight hours a day.
They're in clothing.
They'd like it to be something. They collectively bargain everything with you.
It needs to look decent. It can't look cheap. Like if the Players Union wants something like
this to look better, if the complaints are loud enough, you don't get to just be right on this.
They'll wear what we tell them to wear. They will, but what a dream. If there's a negotiation where the players
want to collectively bargain that they've got to say
over the uniforms and they're willing to give up
something financial for that,
then I guarantee you players will have a say
over what uniforms look like.
It's not without precedent.
It's not without precedent in other sports
with the unions not strong enough.
Remember they change basketballs and you might want to say,
okay, well, that's
what they play the sport with.
So you can understand that.
But remember, players rebelled against the sleeves
that Adidas was creating for basketball.
LeBron went as far as to tear sleeves off of his uniform,
and they stopped manufacturing those.
It did take some time.
What are you shaking your head about, Samson?
I'm laughing, because yes, there are moments that players like to take stands on certain things.
We've had players take stands on what they wear under the uniform because that is also a rule.
We tell the players what they can wear underneath and what can be shown.
And now there's going to be rules, I'm sure, about having batting gloves hanging out of your back pocket
because, God forbid, that ever gets tagged.
But I don't have never seen a baseball player
take a stand like a LeBron James.
I don't even know which baseball player
would have that type of ability.
It's not judge, it's not trout,
it's not anybody who would have that level of power.
It's not Max Scherzer.
I can't think of anybody who would, no, absolutely not.
No client of Scott Boris would get anything done with Major League Baseball.
All right, again with Scott Boris, here are your options because we've only got three
minutes left and I know I could get you going on Boris.
He's got a bunch of clients who are still available as spring training begins.
You love to hate on Boris.
Is there anyone you hate more and is it because he's better at business than you are?
No, it's because he screwed Jose Fernandez's family.
I respected him when I negotiated against him because he got, he got an owner to
always give in and he generally always got his players what they wanted.
But when he crocodile tiered at Jose's funeral, that was it.
I would never, there is no coming back from that.
There's no coming back from not properly being in touch or taking care of the family ever since and just walking away from them.
There's no coming back. And I don't, I'm not a grudge holder. I don't have this level of visceral
anger toward anyone else in my life as I do for him because I know him well enough and I know what
he did and I know exactly what is happening in the world of Jose's family and I can't forgive it. I just won't. What if he were
to say to you, hey David it's nothing personal? I'd say thanks for watching the
show which I know he has his people watching listen to every show and that
makes me smile. Let's play the clip for David here on him trying to figure out
whether he should say seamstress or something else.
It was we have seamstress, seamstress, seams.
Whoa.
It's so great.
Finally it wasn't me.
That's the world we live in where I need to be worried
about not upsetting anyone with the word seamstress.
You didn't need to worry about that, but you did play it again in hisress. You didn't need to worry about that,
but you did play it again in its face.
You didn't need to worry.
We have seamstress, seamstress, seams, um, people.
Whoa.
Why did you stop complaining about the world you live in
and just say it right?
Because did you know that there's no male version
of seamstress?
Well, I didn't know the rules of overtime either,
but it didn't make me stop criticizing Kyle Shanahan.
Not at the Shanahan.
He knew the rules.
He did not.
30 seconds or less, what are you reviewing?
Oh, 30 seconds for society of the snow.
That's tough, man.
And whether or not you do it.
All right, no.
You're halfway done with it, David.
It's really good, David.
Hold on, hold on.
Just stop right there.
Do your review and Juju will put it out on social by itself because you don't want to be limited.
Limited to 30 seconds. Nothing personal is the podcast. If you want 50 daily minutes, they are rocket fueled with David Samson every
every morning. Thank you, David. Take care. It's 45. We have seam seamsters. Seamstress. Seamstress.
Whoa.
of seam seamsters, seamstress, seamstress. Whoa.
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Don Lebatard!
If all the rain drops were lemon drops and gun drops, oh what a rain that would be.
Stugats!
Standing outside with my mouth open wide. Ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah If all the rain drops were lemon drops and gum drops, oh what a rain that would be.
This is the Don Lebatar Show with the Stugads.
Billy broke my heart a little bit this morning when he came in and felt like love was a little
broken for him because he asked the group with a sly smile on his face a private conversation
Wendy has stopped caring about Valentine's Day
Private conversation amongst you know colleagues. Well now we're here because it broke my heart
Yeah, I'm friends. There are no private conversations around Dan LeBatard. They're not
Have you stop better? Have you stopped caring?
No, I'm just curious if everyone else had stopped caring.
I saw Dan, if we're just airing things out,
I saw Dan yesterday was walking to the elevator,
walking in this direction with a giant wrapped thing
in hearts that I didn't know.
Did you wrap that yourself?
No, Elise wrapped it, but I trick my wife
every gift-giving time into thinking that I
have wrapped them, but of course I have not wrapped them. I don't wrap well. It's a heady play.
Have you delivered the gifts already? How do you do Valentine's Day? Do you wake up your wife
and then you have all of the gifts there? I have learned. I will tell you this, I did not know the importance of these things.
I did not have any access to sort of the idea
of treating something as silly as a contrived
commercial holiday into a reminder that I love her.
But why would I not remind her as often as I can?
I'm very happy with her.
And so I have learned, yes, before I left the house today,
I left an assortment of things out
that if she had woken up earlier, she would have gotten to,
but I had to leave before she could open them.
You're still new to the game.
You are, that will stop.
It will stop in a few years.
And how about you tell her you love her on Thursday?
Yeah.
That's that sound.
I do, yes, I do.
But I tell her more on the appointed days.
Look, man, it's been a rough go for her
for the last two years, and I could not be more appreciative
in all the ways of the way that she loves me,
and so if I can show her in some small way
on a day that's commercially meant for it, I'll do it.
How small?
No, it wasn't small.
No, I'm a good gift giver.
My heart was broken yesterday,
because I like to get my wife Valentine's Day gifts.
They're not the traditional teddy bears and roses.
I think we've kind of outgrown that.
I like to give my wife things like shoes and university Miami stuff that I know that she
appreciates.
So I got her these shoes that she said she really liked and I went to go put them in
her closet.
We have separate closets and I put it in the closet,
and I was reminded of a pair that I bought her two years ago
that I totally forgot about, and I put these shoes next to that,
and the laces still hadn't been done on the shoes
that I bought her two years ago for Valentine's Day.
That was a bit crushing.
It seemed that she doesn't like the University of Miami
apparel.
Well, these were like Golden State Warrior Jordan 1s,
the royal blue and golds.
Really excited like, I got them, screen cap type of thing.
It was a big Nike drop two years ago,
and I was really excited to give it to her.
I totally forgotten that the pair existed
because she hadn't been wearing them.
And she's gone so far as to care so little
that she hasn't even laced them up.
I bought this pair two years ago.
But you're a huge romantic, are you not?
Doesn't sound like it.
This is a bad example.
UN gear?
Well, you may have.
You should buy them in your size just in case you
choose not to wear them, then you can mess them.
It'd be odd.
Yeah.
I don't think she can fit in 12s, but yeah.
No, I'm hugely romantic, but this is our 20th plus Valentine
stay together.
I'm struggling to find something that captures the essence
of romance here.
I save that for every day.
You know, I just love her every day.
But this is one of those days in the calendar
that you're supposed to give gifts.
I don't receive gifts on Valentine's Day.
I don't.
I don't ask for one.
I don't expect them.
It's her day.
The greatest gift that I give my wife every single year is the gift of no sex
It's I mean
Never seen her happier. Why did you roll your eyes at that? Jessica every year the same Joe guy?
Yeah, I'm never gonna stop. There's a call it repeat. We said it here before
I would like it's a great gift right out. I would like as a gift as an appropriate
I would like as a gift as an appropriate gift. I'm not gonna try it.
Try it out.
I'm on behalf of our show, I'm about to give Jessica a Valentine's Day gift.
She bakes around here, she makes some delicious things for us and the gift I'm gonna give
her and I'm promising her this every year for the rest of time is a sound on the show
that she has never heard before that we are going to introduce her to
That is in the news terrible gift
I'm gonna give her just a jersey. I'm gonna give her the gift of laughter right here
You guys don't know us the Knicks the Knicks what you stop talking about my relationship
The so when does love died did we get an answer officially?
Somewhere between my relationship and your relationship at I had the gift of no sex.
We're doing Valentine's Day.
What are you guys doing?
Well, Lehman said he was gonna surprise me,
but then he told me right before he dropped me off
what we were gonna do.
What is it?
Can you tell me what he understood?
He took me out to lunch after the show with the doggies.
Oh, nice.
Do you like surprises?
Would you have preferred it as a surprise?
I like when there's a surprise,
but I find out what the surprise is beforehand.
When did he say it was a surprise last night?
When I asked him when he dropped me off, I said, what are we doing for Valentine's Day? And he said, it's a surprise, but I find out what the surprise is beforehand. When did he say it was a surprise last night? When I asked him when he dropped me off I said what are we
doing for Valentine's Day and he said it's a surprise but I'll tell you. Classic line.
So he gave you the perfect gift. This is what you want to be doing. He told you
you have enough control of the situation that you you're getting it on your
terms and it's sort of a surprise. But it's his idea but it was a surprise but it
wasn't a surprise. Did you guys see the episode of Curb this week where it was
Suzie's birthday where this is like,
I'm wondering, yeah, if Lehman did this situation
where he's like, it's a surprise,
and then you're like, what's the surprise?
Then he says what the surprise is,
and then it's highest the gauge,
whether this is good enough or surprise for you.
It's a great strategy by Larry.
Then he has all day long while you're at work
to figure out what else do I need to get for Jess.
Last year he got me this Guy Fieri Valentine's Day shirt,
which was also a surprise.
And now I'm wearing it this year.
You guys think it's a shitty gift from me to her,
but you don't even know what the sound is,
because I'm gonna give her the gift of laughter.
The Knicks are going to win this protest,
and there's gonna be extra game played,
because there's going,
it's not gonna be one of these two minute reports,
they're gonna win a protest,
because the call guy,
I know Billy doesn't agree with this but Ed
Malloy was in the middle of this and I just asked Jessica have you ever heard
our Ed Malloy sound and her response was no so here is the end of a timber
wolves game and it's what we know as a show of Ed Malloy down by two a hundred
and ninety eight inbound a love on the left side with one jubble was up for the
shot it's blocked by Marion The ball comes into the arms of
Dallabare. The horn sounds and the ball game is over. The Timberwolves are
screaming for a foul. There was none called. Rubio off to love. Oh, that is unbelievable.
Referees are booed as they go off the floor.
Brutal.
David Guthrie is right there.
He didn't have the guts to call it.
Also, go, Ed Malloy! Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha a gift. This stands a test of time. It really does. Better than lunch with your boyfriend?
I'm more excited for lunch to be honest. And the Guy Fieri t-shirt. I can't believe it.
Sorry. And the thing Mike gave me. What? He gave me something. Everybody of all
I'd say present. Mike, you were trying to be thoughtful and everyone then sat on the
shirts. Tell the people what you tried to give everybody here. It was a very thoughtful gift.
Yeah, I had a friend that works for AFC Bournemouth
and he gifted everybody on the show, customized jerseys.
No matter your team, we still root for Jim Frivola,
hopefully future AD at the University of Miami.
We all root for Jim Frivola and the Fighting Super Cherries.
Can you guys tell me whether anybody?
Other than the chiefs and the Kelsey's look at this pathetic pile of jerseys
And it's just people that aren't here to claim their jerseys
That's a still pad I'll call this super cherries mean someone fold those at least
It's a lovely gift those are lovely jerse. People would like to have those jerseys.
We've got just a big pile of them in the other room
with our names on them.
Apparently no one wants them.
The ultimate gift will be when you try to squeeze
into an umbro.
Oh.
I wanted to ask the group whether anyone other
than Mahomes and the Chiefs and the Kelceys
won the Super Bowl weekend business,
more than Dunkin' Donuts.
More than Dunkin' Donuts giving you a commercial
that spans generations, that grabs some nostalgia,
that is funny, and then they release gear that sells out,
and then they release the four minute commercial
that has JLo and Matt Damon in it.
And I'm genuinely curious because there were a lot of people making a lot of money on Sunday.
Did Dunkin Donuts win the entire advertising spectacle or did someone else win it?
I knew about Dunkin Donuts beforehand.
I didn't know about Temu.
And I didn't know about Cereve.
I knew that there was a lotion, but I thought that the I didn't know about Cereve.
I knew that there was a lotion, but I thought that the Cereve.
I love Cereve.
Now, I spotted it in the supermarket the other day.
I'm like, oh, that's Michael Cera's cream.
I'd also say they lost,
because they've been just dunking for like five years already,
and we're still just calling them Dunkin' Donuts.
Wait, what?
Yeah, they changed their name.
I didn't know that.
Yeah, American Runs on Dunkin'.
Yeah. They dropped the donuts. So they didn know that. Yeah, American Runs on Dunkin'. Wow.
They dropped the donuts.
So they didn't win the weekend,
somebody else won the weekend.
I thought everyone loved that commercial.
Everyone did and the track suits sold out,
but I mean, they had brand recognition.
I was introduced to several brands in the Super Bowl,
so isn't that the point of spending that much money?
So I think that they won, and then people were like,
I want these track suits.
And then Darren Revelle tweeted out that he had one
yesterday, and then everyone was looking up
the exchange policy on the track.
Yeah, it's a product killer.
There is just kind of a weird,
he has a weird like win, and it's so great,
and you sell his stuff, and there's like, oh.
All right, Juju, put it on the,
Respectfully. Put it on the poll, yeah, respectfully, juju put it on respectfully put it on the pole yet respectfully respectfully
juju put it on the pole respectfully is Darren Ravel a boner killer. I would say de-influencer
but
You can go with that. Oh, yeah, did anyone good on him. I'm not gonna lie. I wouldn't wear it
Oh, really? Well, it was a bucket of death punishment for us.
Like yesterday we planned that out, but.
Well, now it's an actual punishment.
That's the, yeah, kind of.
That's how quickly something goes from popular to unpopular.
Rebellion.
As soon as Rebellion wears it.
Really?
So if he could get it before you you no longer want it
That's wrong That's wrong
Look at you. Look the cool kids back there. I I thought it was someone mentioning your grandma mid-stroke
Unless you're trying to hold it down
What what?
Valentine's Day ladies and gentlemen, what are you ever gonna do? Oh?
What?
Valentine's Day, ladies and gentlemen, what are you having to do?
Oh, yeah, no, I've been there.
I've been there.
You want to impress and then-
Can you keep those thoughts to yourself?
No, you got dead writing things down now.
No, you've been there big day, you want to impress.
No, I haven't.
Next thing you know,
you're f***ing a nine ending baseball game.
We need to do breathing exercises again.
I mean, yes, can we, can someone lead us in breathing exercises?
Because you've never been there having sex and then try to go through all the killer bees of the astros
dirt bill
You're just trying to put on a show over here. They will people forget about bell
They do he's not he's the forgotten be
He's the forgotten bee.
I'm stunned that that was moving so fast for Sturgats that he didn't even notice Tony's... I thought about Derrick Bell and then it came quicker.
He didn't even notice Tony's unless you're trying to keep it down.
It's an unstoppable force sometimes, especially on that maca.
It's an unstoppable force sometimes. Oh come on.
Especially on that MACA.
Come on.
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Don Lebatard!
If I'm at the house with them and they're all rooting, I could just be like, yeah,
rah, rah, rah.
Go Yankees.
Stugats!
You know how unsettling it would be if I attended a live sporting event and someone
behind me would just go on...
Rah, rah!
The game's...
Rah, Browns!
Ra Heath!
Ra Ra Ra!
This is the Don Lebatar Show with the Stugats!
Three days after the Super Bowl, Mike Ryan tossed the Molotov cocktail of race into the proceedings,
wondering whether or not Travis Kelsey, if he had been black and bumped Andy Reid whether the reaction would have been
different the way that AJ Brown was suggesting and of course it would be.
It's just funny that what were presently in the middle of because it has been
sanctified by Taylor Swift she is the over this, like Tebow was the halo
over the Gators huddle that concealed a murderer.
The idea that a rage-fueled tight end
would trample his coach and that his drunken brother
was shirtless everywhere all over Las Vegas.
If that family was overrunning football and the pop star
and weren't what that family is,
it would be received far differently.
The whole experience, Jason Kelsey dominated the Super Bowl.
People wanted to see that dad bod
careening from holding kids to galloping in his pajamas
through the airport on the way back to, you know,
wherever it is that he's coming from
because he just did seven days of God knows what.
Drinking nonstop, partying with his brother,
drinking liberally from fame,
chastising his brother for not inventing the fate
and having that be a New York Times article
as Black History Month starts,
because everyone's new to the Kelsey Party.
But when does drunken brother ever get to be a part
of the grift?
Drunken Brother on the side loved by everybody.
Maybe more popular.
Politics.
Yeah.
Billy Carter and Jimmy Carter is the only place.
I remember that being a blight on Jimmy Carter's.
I remember that being a-
R-F-K.
Kennedys.
Yeah, W.
Like it's a political main say really
She's super American
Everyone loves Jason got it going on the hunter adjacent Jason Kelsey is lovable is he not yes? Yeah, yeah, we laid a ball. Yes, what happened Billy? That's too much already. What I just too much
What do you mean you guys aren't tired of him? I mean yay stealing his brother shine?
Yeah, he is he his brother's shine. Yeah, he is.
He's grifting off Taylor Swift here.
How?
He's in the background of all these videos
just being drunk.
Yeah, he's in the background with a wrestling mask on.
Yeah, he's someone that just wants to be a supporting role.
Taylor and Travis are in the background,
then the camera pans to the foreground,
and guess who's there in a Ramis cereal mask next to him?
Someone that doesn't want to be seen.
Look at him. He just wants to fade into the background.
Fruckin' center.
Exactly right.
He's just there to support Travis.
You guys are jealous.
You've never had this good of a time in your life.
That's true, and you never will.
And you never will.
No, I will not.
It seems like Jason, Kelsey, and Travis
are enjoying the holy hell out of life.
I'm curious whether now the relationship gets real
for Taylor and Jason as they have to spend time
around each other.
Well, Taylor and Travis.
Yeah, Travis.
Excuse me, yes.
Unless you know something.
Unless she's spending too much time around Jason,
which also might be a wake up call.
Yeah.
Why is it that older brother, Jason,
is giving off so much dad compared to Travis?
How is it that he seems so much old?
Is it just the hairy?
Because he's a dad. No, it's not just the gut, it's the Harry gut. The fact that the gut is Harry-
Well the fact that he's a dad too. Yes. Dads are always Harry. I don't know why.
Sure. I was thinking of dads, I think of Harry. I don't know. Guys, you guys know
that we're still not right from Vegas. All of us are still broken. I'm not sure
how sober Jessica still is. Vegas with kids, are you out of your mind?
Vegas the way Jason Kelsey just did it,
even with all the help in the world,
my God, that man must be tired right now.
You know how when you're in Vegas,
they pump the oxygen through the casinos
and stuff to keep you awake and you kind of start.
Is that what it was?
You guys didn't know that?
Is that like an old wives' tale?
What is that?
No, no, no, that's true.
There's no clocks and they pump in oxygen.
Yeah, like I-
But the people not using cocaine.
No windows, they don't give you windows
so you can't see outside.
Exactly, and you just kind of feel like
you're in this weird kind of fog, this weird haze.
I still feel that way,
and at this point I'm wondering if I'm just getting sick.
I don't feel right.
All of us are coughing.
Again, the flights back, red eyes from Vegas are the worst.
Beans as an appetizer.
I don't know why they would do that.
I don't know how to experience Vegas with children,
but I would say a good way to do it is with an au pair.
Yes, I'm guessing that they had substantive help,
but I also saw them.
I didn't see them at excess.
I saw him at Disney holding kids.
He's carrying weights all the time.
Yeah, that's an appropriate place for a child.
Excess, they card. I's an appropriate place for a child. That says they card.
Ha ha ha ha ha.
I saw him with his kids a lot.
I also saw him with Patrick, not Patrick Mahomes,
his brother.
Jackson Mahomes.
Jackson, he was uncomfortable with Jackson Mahomes,
was kind of draped on him.
And it felt like listening to the audio of Taylor Swift
and Travis Kelsey on the field,
it felt like that was a bit invasive.
I mean, a bit.
It was very invasive, but also it's the Super Bowl.
There are microphones everywhere
and they were covering their mouth
and it's like, I love you so much.
And there's either, either Taylor said in response,
I'm so proud of you right now,
or depending on the Twitter account that you follow,
it's kind of like that is the dress,
blue or gold type of thing.
I'm so turned on right now.
I've heard both.
I don't think she said I'm so turned on right now.
Why else would she be covering her mouth?
It's weird.
Prove it though, is that what you're saying?
It's not what you know, Daniel.
It's what you can prove in a court of law.
I don't know if that audio holds up.
I truly don't know.
I don't care what they find to be evasive.
I really don't.
You're a power couple. You're the most famous person in the world like enough the cameras are gonna be on you
Let's give this a couple months before we find out this whole time
They've been recording everything and there's a new show or a movie
Her new albums coming out Billy so the reveal has already been revealed. Tell you how you you're evasive
You do what Leo de Caprio did
Which is 25 year olds which is you don't pick your head up.
Maybe, you know, scratch your nose a couple of times
in a suspicious manner and you just move on with your day.
You don't go in front of all the cameras.
Jeff Goldblum seems like a lot, right?
I know you guys probably love him.
He seems like a lot.
What do you mean?
He just seems like a lot.
Never stops talking.
He reminds me of you.
Oh my God, the dance, no way.
Yes.
You saw him dancing on the screen,
you see me doing that?
A little bit.
There's endless amounts of energy there.
It's incredible for his age, how he has so much energy.
Billy, are you getting out there first with the take of,
I'm done with Jason Kelsey?
Enough with the Kelsey's?
And Jeff Goldblum.
Enough with, and Jeff Goldblum.
Enough with everybody.
I didn't say those things.
I just said Jeff.
I just occurred those things.
Goldblum seems like a lot.
Does he not?
Could you imagine if that was like your dad like you'd have to go places
with him not if he was your dad not if he was your dad real-time exactly right
it's fine to like him from a distance you spent time I never have I feel like
he's super charming right stop that would be weird
Because he is so hot
Kind of like what Tony was saying earlier about his grandma
Hmm, not what I was saying. If you're trying to think about her when she's
Tony, I don't know
He was holding it down. What is Mike's grandma not mine. Oh, oh
That's my son Oh That's a fine
That's pretty messed up. I'll pay a fine for that ten dollars Tony. Why why did you flog us with an attorney earlier? You were you were?
Let me well, I said Dan obviously I'm still John Reed's attorney from the stuff that happened
Oh, obviously everybody knows that obviously came back and I was like it's not what you know
It's what you can prove I just have to say that so people know but you're you're a career loser at these cases
I don't understand why sir. All right look since you can't it's not what you can prove
It's what you can prove in a note to do in a court of law
Let's all listen to this sound on the field and you guys tell me what is being said here in their most intimate moment
I said this was invasive not evasive
in their most intimate moment. I said this was invasive, not evasive. Oh.
Thank you for coming, baby.
Oh, I cannot believe that.
Thank you.
I can't believe you.
Thank you for the support.
How did you do that?
Thank you for coming.
Thank you for making it across that way, across the world.
You're the best, baby.
Oh, my God.
The absolute best.
Was it electric?
It was unbelievable.
I don't see any. I'm proud of you.
I didn't hear you.
I'm so turned on. There was a different one. There was a different one in the slack'm proud of you. I didn't hear you there.
I'm so turned on.
I didn't hear you there.
That was a different one in the Slack.
That was super clear though.
What were you able to prove there, Dano?
You know that one.
Nothing.
It's not my, I was able to prove the video department pulled up the wrong video.
I was able to prove what I was able to prove.
You wheel that up in court?
No, I'm laughing at you from your side.
Everybody is.
That's right, Tony.
If he's John Reed's attorney and also trying to prove that this is a conflict of interest,
I don't like any of this Tony.
Okay, so let's try this again with video and see if they can pull up the correct audio because that felt like...
That's the video we have.
The jury's laughing right now.
Oh, come on. Come on.
What do you mean that's the video we have?
I have a video of John Reed. He made a music video if you want that video.
Valentine's Day. You do? You do? Oh, I do. What happened? That's the video we have. I have a video of John Reedy made a music video if you want that video.
Valentine's Day.
You do?
Oh, you do?
What happens?
You have that now?
Oh, it's here if you want it.
All right, well, go.
You didn't give me the video I wanted,
so why don't you give me the one I don't? One plus one, that's two, ways to find love
One plus one, that's two, ways to find love
You love the F out the show
You know we love you more You love the F out the show You know we love you more
You love the F out the show
You know we love you more
We know you get the show
We can feel the love
You love the Labrador show
You know we love you more
One plus one, that's two
Ways to find love
One plus one, that's two
Ways to find love
Who do you love more than us two?
Who do you love more, Billy Toot?
Who do you love more? Billy too Who do you love more? Mike Ryan
Who do you love more? Who keep you crying
Who do you love more? Is it Tony?
Who do you love more? Jessica
Who do you love more? Is it Lucy?
A Roy? A Greg? Juju? A Chris? I'm done
One plus one, that's two ways to find love.
One plus one, that's two ways to find love.
No, don't turn it down.
No, you sink into this.
No, you sink into this.
This is what it's going to be like with the book.
I asked for a certain video, and this
is what the new executive producer in that seat today
gave me, this.
So you sit in it.
What they told me we had.
Do not come out of it early.
I was just told, Lewis just said in my ear, throwing everyone under the bus, this is what
he was doing, recording this instead of getting you the Kelsey audio you wanted from Taylor
Swift.
Cause he was b-
Oh, it's over.
Dan, that's his lead counsel.
Good video.
What I want to say is he did not approach me with this.
I wouldn't have brought it to the show.
I would have had it stricken from the memory.
How does that get on the air if not for Billy just panicking and throwing it on the air?
How did that go through the barricades and the sensors and the things that protect us
from bad content?
Bat?
Huh.
Valentine's Day.
It's a catchy tune.
One plus one.
There's two.
That was the G rated version too.
Oh yeah, that was another version.
I didn't hear the other version.
The other version is the one that I heard in Vegas.
Spicy.
The other one.
There's a blue version.
Oh yeah, I didn't know. There's a there's a blue version
It's not one plus one six plus nine maybe
This is really bad judgment