The Dick Show - Episode 219 - Dick on the Big Countdown to Nothing

Episode Date: August 11, 2020

Nothing is ever happening, pulling your penis while doing Kung Fu, a week of cold showers, putting the Switch away wrong, more cops murdering people, Taylor from PKA proves Hellen Keller is a phony, KFC's very racist ad, Orc Girl and donkey transformation, Sean’s Animal Corner, the coin shortage, Biden's Vetting process, and Maddox tries to tone down the anti-semitism on his Twitch channel; all that and more this week on The Dick Show!

You know what I, you know what my kind of porn is? I've been lying about going to Google. I go to the breast reduction plastic surgeons and I look at the before pictures. Yeah, that's a good one. That's a, it sounds like the start of a standup. That's the start of a standup. Yeah, that's my memoirs.

That title, that entire thing is the title. Looking at the after pictures is akin to murder for you. I'm gonna fire bomb one of, that's gonna is the title. Looking at the after pictures as a can to murder for you. I'm going to fire bomb one of that's going to be my like people fire bomb abortion clinics. I'm going to show up at one of those. Yeah, cause my breast reduction surgeons have cancer like that's it. I'm done with these doctors. Yeah, that's it. I'm done with the butchery that they put women through.

Right. That is where you are lockstep with women in cases of mutilation. That's going to be my unibomber. Your manifesto. Yeah, I'm going to mail those packages around. Yeah. Only to breast reduction. You have to have dreams.

I make the brows are all big, so I can't see the, like I zoom in, so I can't see the after. Yeah. And I just scroll through the floor. Oh, yeah. Sometimes I scroll down so you can see one can't see the zoom in so I can't see the after. And I just scroll through the window. Sometimes I scroll down so you can see one boob on the frame and then you got to go scroll down a little bit more to see the other one. Oh, they are sometimes. Let's not symmetry shame. I'm saying that I'll enjoy it. I know.

And then I seek it out. That's what I'm telling you right now. Right. A lot of simps won't like this rant, but because they can't handle my bands. Oh. But I like them real bit. Okay. Now I'm stealing Sir Mix a lot, Zach.

How are you? Good. I fucked up my, oh, let's start the show then. Cool. Is that thing? Hey. Hey. Let me see if let's start the show then. Cool. Hey, is that thing? Hey. Let me see if I can get the intro right. Yeah, feeling a lot of sorts.

Yeah. Hey, how's it going today? You want to get me to get you to get me to get me to get me to get me to get me to get me to get me to get me to get me to get me to get me to get me to get me to get me to get me to get me to get me to get me to get me to get me to get me to get me to get me to get me to get me to get me to get me to get me to get me to get me to get me to get me to get me to get me to get me to get me to get me to get me to get me to get me to get me to get me to get me to get me to get me to get me to get me to get me to get me to get me to get me to get me to get me to get me to get me to get me day you want to give me a big and lovely You got it. It's a show where it's a contest gonna you like for a mountain bunker deep in the hardest to be failure I mean, how's the Mexican? Okay, the $20 million man. Voters, America's worst Mexican 69 weeks running I 69 weeks running Sean

Pretty that was pretty was that Mexican of you was the I Joining me is always world touring LA based comedian, Sean the audio engineer. Hello, Dick, thank you for not killing yourself. Thank you for not killing yourself. Thank you for not killing yourself. God, I've never been closer than right now. I feel so out of swords. Why?

Well, my water heater, I guess, broke. I don't know. After my last experience with nearly exploding myself, I kind of pumped the brakes on what, how far I'm willing to. I'm not willing to. Lights and things. Yeah. I was taking a shit a couple days ago and leaving the shower on because I like

to pretend that I'm shitting in the rain forest. You know, everyone knows that about me. I'll leave that thing on and go do my taxes, answer emails, come back an hour and a half later, shower still going. You should zits of water are leaking from the ceiling. So yeah, it's going to be. You should get I think I'm gonna have a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a

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Shitting in the jungle, man. Um, and then I stopped, I, I ceased shitting and I got in the shower and it was ice, I asked cold. Oh no. It happens from time to time because I'm in there so long wasting water in California, in Southern California. Uh, there's not a water shortage in California. I mean, there's a nothing.

There's nothing happening. None of this is actually happening. I just want to stress that. It's, it has been taught. We had so much rain in the last few years. Yeah, the reservoirs get way down and it gets fucked and right, it always seems like right in the nick of time, it fucking, shot and something like the cities use like something like it's less than 10% of the state's water. So we grow all the almonds and apricots. Literally nothing is happening. I can't stress that enough since the dawn of time. It's been, you're going to hell.

Demon, there's gonna be an apocalypse. God is gonna rain his wrath down. You have to prepare for going to hell. There's a water shortage. There's an AIDS epidemic. There's a drug epidemic. There's a super predator epidemic. There's an actual pandemic.

The globe is heating up. We're not gonna be able to live here for very much longer There's no more food, there's a food shortage, women won't want to fuck you, all women are getting raped and they don't want to fuck you And literally, you have to start saving for the future, you won't have any money, but literally the value of money is evaporating from Nothing is happening. Nothing has ever happened in the entire history of the world. None of it. Fucking none of it. Shit just goes away. The Empire just all the shit that Rome everything Roman and Roman ever prepared for the Empire just vanished. They've never prepared for that one. Never. Nothing has ever happened. Nothing. No, you're not. There's no water shortage. There never was. It was just a scam for all men farmers to get a better deal on their fucking water the whole time, the whole fucking time. It's funny because it is like the just the world is so much bigger than us. There is no China.

It's people living in caves, 30 million people live in fucking caves. It does none of this shit exists. And we'll be gone. And other things will be here and the earth will change. And there's a good data crypto rock. Oh my God, the vacuum energy, and we're losing vacuum energy in space. Please explain it. The year is 20, 25, the year is 2250.

The quantum foam is evaporating. Our top experts, our top quantum mechanists say that the integrity of quantum foam is degrading. and we won't be able to power our space blow-job machines with vacuum energy. If we allow this to happen, we all have to get together because of the fucking science. Because of the fucking science, they're saying the quantum foam is degenerating. And I'm going to be there going on fire. Are you fuck? I'm going to be talking to you. I'm going to be stuck in the face. I'm going to be you fuck I'm gonna be talking I'm career early. I'm gonna be I'm gonna be I'm gonna be talking to an artificially intelligent

quote of myself who's the real me. I'm the fucking fake saying can you believe this shit that they're trying to pull yet again? Well here's the thing in the in the big scheme of things we have fuck all to say about anything. I mean if things if things happen on a global scale, there's nothing we can do to stop it. I mean, not really.

You know, it's really happening. It comes in something like, I mean, you're fucked. You can't do a goddamn thing about any of it. We have this, we have this mistaken belief that we can control like really, really big things. We got to control those asterisans. We got to team up. You know, we're never ever stupid on our own.

We're never, get together. To get, yeah. We're, no, we have technology that we have no business having because we're too stupid to use it. We've got to put our best minds on it. You know what? No, no. We got to all get together and really think it out.

That's what I really gotta think this. We gotta you and me and every guy pick the, don't find the dumbest guys you know. Get them together, we're gonna have a big group think. We're gonna think it out, think and style, like think you least. We're gonna think a big think golem. Well, I'll come to the conclusion.

I think the best minds will come to the conclusion that you can only do this, this, and this, and anything that's like It bigger than that. You're fucked and you have no power and you have to be okay with that The best minds are spending their time trying to convince everybody else not to kill them because that's what historically happens to the best minds Like well, you learn at a very early age I know you get these people are fucking dangerous. I don't you guys. I don't have any solutions You're not gonna get killed. You're not gonna get killed.

You get killed, yeah, exactly. Whatever kind of heresy is like in this, this century. I don't wanna be accused of that. So whatever you guys are thinking, I'm thinking it too. Actually, I'm thinking it doubly. You're not thinking it, you're guilty. Hang that guy. Woo.

Yeah, got away with another one. Got away from another century again, without these fucking morons stringing me up, shooting their quantum foam all over me. Um, so my water heater. Oh yeah, the water heater. It's just swimming in a, the shower was ice cold.

Yeah. So I shut it off. Usually, you know, charges back up. I don't know how that charges. How does it heat all that water so quickly? I don't know. It's one of life's mysteries. I don't know, it's pretty quick though, huh?

Yeah. Shout it off. This happens to me all the time, because I'm always just wasting water. Turn it back on, I's cold again, I say no. Go into the studio here where the water heater is, and it's swimming in a big vat of water. Oh no.

Yeah, so well, I guess I'm taking cold showers for the next week, till a fucking plumber comes out. Yeah. Every single time I get one down, one down minute, everything breaks, plumbing, shut down, something the water heater's dead, so I'm taking cold showers, which means, you know, whore baths, soaping yourself up

and then jumping into the shower. And every fucking time I take a cold shower like when my hands are waving like that autistic girl who's faking being autistic on the internet. Like is your water really fucking cold here? Oh, it comes from so deep under the earth, you know? Yeah, where you can't control your breathing. Yeah, in Hollywood.

If the water's your breath. Why are you right on the surface? It's hot. There's teeming with hatred there, but he's about to hear in the kind of loop of sticks. Yeah. teaming with the hatred there, but he bowed here in the kind of blue sticks. And every time I do it, I get this fucking flashback. Every time I have to take a cold shower of this Asinine video, they made us watch in a middle school. I think it was junior high. It was like a heart health video that they had all the kids. I don't know if there was just like a terrorist attack or the space shuttle, another space shuttle blew up

or something, but they brought all of the kids into this, into the auditorium to watch what is, what would be considered a satirical video in today's era, like it was one of those 50s produced or 60s produced health information. It was about the guy who has the heart attack. Yeah. And he was, he was like a rage monster and stuff like that.

And then he would like turn on the cold water to shock himself into, I don't know like that. No, it was like, it had like a little animation of his heart and this guy for some reason it described his day. And it described a day that would make anyone want to kill themselves. Like he wakes up, powers down, shoves eggs down his throat and then takes a shower.

And the highlight of his day is that he's zazzes himself He wakes up, powers down, shoves eggs down his throat and takes a shower. And the highlight of his day is that he's zazz-as himself with cold water. That's what I just said. Yeah, I know exactly the video. You watch it too? I watched it too. And it like, it's on the screen. What's it make us watch this video?

Because they were tired of all the public schoolteachers were tired of rapes that day. That all of the rapes, that's the one thing that's happened. In all of history, teachers raping kids. And somehow, that's the one thing that's happened. In all of history, teachers raping kids. And somehow, that is the only thing that is happening. Another of that other stuff is happening. The beginning and the end of all action on the globe, since the beginning of time. Quantum foam is so bad, there's gonna be somebody raping a kid,

you know, we have child sex bots that you can just rap, and he's like, nah, I like the real thing. Like, god, damn it, we still can't stop them, man. Is that too dark? I think it's pretty funny. I don't, you know what? That's true. You know it's true.

I'm gonna go on darker. Like, I, um, you know that you're gonna do that. Well, there we have sex spots that are like nine years old. Now, I like the real thing. I didn't know that, but. You know, well, no, of course they could make them. Of course they could make them. They're all so big fit about it.

Ah, that drop up up up up here, encouraging bad vibes and just shut the fuck up. Just shut up. But you know, have it. You know that people who are, it was like, you know, Larry Nasser, the like US women's gymnastics, coach or doctor, whatever. Oh, bad of all. Oh, yeah, like he, he fucking, like he, he molested every fucking one of those trails. That happened totally.

Yeah, and it was amazing that, you know That happened totally. Yeah, and it was amazing. It was amazing. No, it was amazing. It was amazing. It was amazing that he wasn't busted earlier. Yeah, something that shows you what everybody was so busy saving the world from global warming. They forgot to check.

They forgot to cup check this guy. He was around kids all day. Yeah, we tend to anybody on that one. This just goes back to are you conserving water? Yeah, it's easier to fight an enemy that like doesn't really. It doesn't exist. That doesn't. I'm not even going to say it doesn't exist. I'm saying that it's it's you take care of what's in your house first. Yeah. You know, I mean, it's our priorities are completely fucked up when it comes to that. So this guy who's taking you remember that?

I can't believe you saw that video. I wonder how many people had to watch that stupid. Yeah, and it was like about him. He has a heart attack eventually, right? And that's like at the end, it's like, well, Joe no longer shocks his heart with cold water at the end of every shower. So he gets out of his time. He stops smoking.

He doesn't let, you know, they didn't call it road rage back then, but he's like screaming. He's always stressed at work. Yeah. Yeah. And we're like 12. Yeah, and the only thing I remember that whole thing in every fucking time, I don't remember. Take a cold shower, I get that five second clip in my head playing over and over like torture.

I'm gonna die. Yeah, every fucking time, that's what I learned from that video. I smoke, don't think of that video. When I smoke, I think of cool guys. That's why I smoke. When I'm yelling and trying, I actually don't yell learned from that video. Not the smoke, don't think of that video. When I smoke, I think of cool guys. That's why I smoke. When I'm yelling and trying, I actually don't yell and traffic that much.

I don't consider it. Nope. I don't consider it a plebian pursuit. I consider it beneath me. Yeah. I actually, I train myself not to, so that when other people do, I can feel superior to them.

Yeah. Like anybody, if they're upset and trapped, I go over and go, I don't. Good point. So that's other people do, I can feel superior to them. Yeah. My, like anybody, if they're upset and traveling over and go, I don't. Oh, good point. Yeah. So that's what you do. I don't do anything like that. I just think about peaceful things.

I see why you're upset. I see that you have no control over yourself. Yeah. And are there for an inferior person to me? Right. So that's why I feel out of sorts. Gotcha. So the water heater, and I don't want to turn it on.

I don't know how that thing works. I'll be sure. Well, if it's leaking then, you know, is it leaking bad or is it, it's all full, it's full to the, where the drain is, that's as bad as it can be. Oh, okay, well, motherfucker says, well, you know, maybe I can come out in September.

I was like, man, I need, I need a lot of water. What, September? I need hot water right now, man. Yeah, what do you need to take a shit? Where's the shit without that hot water? I can't trust someone on that. I don't know what I a shit. I can't shit without that hot water. I can't trust someone I'm done. You can't deal with smiley on this. No, he makes a puff smiley.

Upside down, and all the water will turn. They'll turn into a water cooler and say, oh, yeah, oh, you want the hot water? I thought you wanted the hot water cooler. I thought cold is good for your heart and I'll say, smiley motherfucker. Yeah, did you watch the video? Do they not show the video?

And I like pull the penis muscle or something. What? Doing kung fu fighting last night with 80s girl. We got into that dirty kung fu stuff and, you know. Dirty kung fu stuff? Yeah, I don't know anything about dirty kung fu stuff. You don't do kung fu fights with your girlfriend? No.

Pop. You gotta show your strengths. You gotta demonstrate your superiors, your strength. Dude, I went ask Illinity. When I gotta do, I just pop, pop, pop. I hit her for real. I just hit her for real.

I just hit her for real. I just hit her for real. Yeah, just pop. No, just like Sean Connery, not you. Right. Yes. Yes, Sean Foo, exactly. You hit her for real?

That's what you do. Well, it's, you know, the most direct, it's the most direct way to relay that you are displeased with something that she has said or done. That's true, that's a good point. Or just that she's talking a lot. I don't know, there's no way. See, they talk so much, there's no way to get in.

There's no way to get in. You know, you're waiting for that. Like, you're a racer. You have those conversations with people in general and racers where you're just like ready for that starting gun of a single moment in the beat. Yeah, fit in there. Yeah, I'm not aware.

Where is it? Give me that fucking right. You've gotta go from like zero to 60 and like two seconds. You better be up and on it. Come on. There's no way you could be thinking this many things. You can, are you, talking while you're inhaling, are you talking both ways, or I can't get in?

Yeah, it's a circular breathing. Ah, I could have smacked 80s girl, speaking of smacking your girlfriend. I got the switch case. You know my Nintendo switch? Yeah, I do. You know, I do. I actually know what that is.

Can you, can you get that switch case? There's actually one in my home. Okay. You have a switch? I do not. She does. What do you play on it? Like free games. I don't play anything.

Are you one of the two people that want to use it to browse the web? I've never picked it up. I've never picked it up. But I can identify the Nintendo switch. So there's that. Yeah, see what she's, see if she gets this. There's a carrying somewhere. Yeah, she's getting it. I want to show you gets this, there's a carrying somewhere.

Yeah, she's getting it. I want to show you this switch. There's a carrying case for it. And it's got this, it's got a flap. It unzips. It's got a flap in it. It's got that pixily Mario. My nephew's got it for me because it's the grandpa Mario.

The original Mario. Yeah, so they got that one for me. Yeah. It's like a joke. There's a little flap in it that has like a protective microfiber coating on it, right? Cause the switch is entirely screen, you know what I'm talking about.

So I'll give it to you and you tell me if it's not fucking obvious how this switch is supposed to be inserted into this. You see this, right here? It opens like a clamshell and then it's got this little flap and there's a nice little microfiber thing there. And do you see how there's on the bottom of the switch? Case, there is a literal drawing of the switch,

like etched, embellished into the fabric. Did you bring the actual, oh, it doesn't have the controllers. Oh, that's weird, it's hard to see unless you get it in the light. Yeah, I guess so. I guess so. So you would, I mean, you would, how would you put this,

the controllers are missing on it, but I could, you could figure it out anyway. I just want to see your thoughts. Okay, so if you have the nice soft area here, this is the software, then I would put it in like that. I mean, that's interesting. Or no, is this a, oh, that's a stretchy thing? Do it less, put less ass into it actually.

Oh, okay, I wasn't sure if that was supposed to be a holder or something. No, that's just there. Well, I don't know what that's for actually. I mean, I put it like so that that hit the screen. Is that, you know, yeah, and then you'd, yeah, a little bit of extra protection on the, yeah, I figured that's the soft part supposed to touch the screen.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, right? So we go to my parents' house and say, hey, will you grab the switch? And this is how it arrives when we get there. Scream, I thought it was going to be underneath the thing, but down, screen against the mesh, the mesh, the mesh, the mesh fold is at the top, so there's just a huge triangle

that you could hide under if there's an earthquake of wasted space in there, or you know, with the pocket where all the fucking games are supposed to go, completely upside down where it comes to the drawing on the other side. I open it up when you get there and say what the fuck is this? Yeah in front of everybody. Oh uncle set a sweat in the what do you uncle set a sweat? Shut the fuck up for a minute. What are you doing here? It's got a drawing for God's sake. It has a drawing on the underside.

Thank you, honey Go walk into a wall Go walk into a wall. I swear I walked into a wall. It was the switch, wasn't it? Fucked up the switch. We did a bonus episode with Carl from Who These Podcasts. That was fun. Everybody should check out.

We got silly. We did. Toward the end, I laughed so hard at that runaway truck ramp. That just fucking killed me. Yeah, that's at the very end of the episode where we bring it back after the Maddox stuff. There are people who say that we should not cover the Maddox. There's always somebody who's, and I think they're probably trolling. He says, like, yeah, don't do the Maddox stuff. I'm like, first of all, just stop listening when it gets to that part.

Like, it's the second half of the episode. Yeah, right. Just fuck off. If you don't like that part, just press stop. Secondly, I'm gonna do it forever because it's hilarious. And it's funny in every single fucking time that we go through it. Those chapters about what were the ones at the end, like, about sexual objectification

where he goes through and tries to measure the sexual objectification is like a heuristic time store philosopher it's it gets really really weird like he's just trying to show how smart he is and that like I entered the entertainment factor just goes right out the window yeah all, so funny. It's a key thing. He puts together a clever sentence to get you and it wasn't that clever and then he just riffs on it for like a minute.

It's so bizarre. That's so odd. And then we found a an itinerary for a fat camp. Not a fat camp where you lose weight. A fat camp where you lose shame, essentially. Like they teach, they train you to not be ashamed of yourself. Right, right. And to not, and to not diet, and to not get healthier.

Like it's a whole camp dedicated to fostering the idea that this is a good way to live. Right. And that you should, and that you should do it more. You should celebrate it instead of even trying to get healthy and save your life. Celebrate it. It's like pure, you know, it's, yeah, it's like, can you grab me in a day, Coke please?

It's like a fantasy camp for drug addicts. Yeah, it's really interesting. What it is. Heroin camp show up and it's got, and they talk about like, what, you know, are there hills there? The number of steps. Yeah, the number of steps. The degrees of incline.

Like if you need ground floor access. There are steps to get to the cafeteria for end of these 20. No, I mean, and this is, you want to encourage this behavior. You want to over-eating, being just fine, saying that health is just an arbitrary set of races. Yeah, well, it's racist. Yeah, it's racist, is just an arbitrary, you know, set of racists. Yeah, well, it's racist. Yeah, it's racist, is that right? I wish I was joking about the racist part, but of course, these people on the podcast, it's obviously racist, you know.

That's another one that's happening. Oh, all this racism, okay. It's really, I'm been happening for a long time. It's gonna be, gonna be having me forever, okay. Well, one waiting's happening. Oh, all this racism, okay. It's really, I'm been happening for a long time. It's gonna be, gonna be happening forever, okay. Well, one waiting for it. Whoa, I'm getting ready for all the racism coming. No, it's been since the beginning of time, since people looked different,

there has been whatever you wanna call it. Yeah, the end of the balls. The end of the balls got fucked anyway. Yeah. We fucked with those guys. I think there was like five other human species I was reading recently, and we fucked all of them. I think there was like five other human species I was reading. Recently, and we fucked all of them.

Yeah, well, I mean, the DNA's in us. Yeah, I think most of us, I don't know what the percentage of Neanderthal, the Neanderthal, the Neanderthal. There'd be a lot of dog in us too, if women had their way, if we could. I think everybody has Neanderthal DNA except sub-Saharan Africans,

because they never meant, I don't think you'd be allowed to say that. Yeah, you can't, because they never... People who are experiencing Sub-Saharan Africa. Well, where the roots are from. Sub-Saharan Africans. It's people who are experiencing Sub-Saharan Africans. I don't know about experience.

Spareancing. That's how you wash. That's how you... I don't know how to say... Whitewash, you can't say whitewash. I don't know how to say white wash. You can't say white, I don't know how to say, I don't know, I'm not familiar with that term. Yeah, but I think you can say white wash because it's negative. Is it? Yeah, if you're, you know, if you're white washing history, that's a bad thing. You're cut, right? You're covered. You're, you're doing it from the white perspective and you're,

you're just glossing over the atrocities and such. It's just so easy to sound that stupid, you know? Yeah. Like just like the woke people. Like it's just so easy. If as long as you say ridiculous things, it just sounds the same as how they talk. You know what I mean? I guess so.

Here's it. I guess I should be happy about my water because now Garcetti cannot shut off my water if I have a house party. That's true. You see that? Yeah, power and electricity if you have a party. Yeah, sure. Offshore.

Yeah, that sounds perfectly reasonable. Shutting off, shutting off, what about my dialysis machine that I have in the base, shutting off my fucking power for having a party? What, how you gotta keep the reactor plugged in? It's just for show. It doesn't actually, it's not actually powered by vision. It's just, here's a rage for you.

Lego goes digital. The Liarsman gets a Lego, gets a Lego's, gets a Mario Lego. This one's gonna, this one's really, I'm really gonna build this one for you. Okay. It's a Mario Lego. What's the best fucking memory of the Lego? What is a Mario Lego set? Yeah, Mario like, like, you know, Lego saved their company by licensing IPs, you know?

So that's all they do now. I know. I watched a whole documentary on Lego. Me too. Me too. I watched that documentary too. Yeah. Yeah.

That guy used to get in the shower and then turn on the cold water after he ran the hot for a while. I hate that. I would, I would, I would fucking wash the thing my brain and erase the last 30 years of my life just to get rid of that fucking memory. It's so weird. I, in the shower.

Why do we remember that? Because it's the same, it's the same video. I just, because I think that was the, like that was one of the first times my brain broke. Like, where I'm sitting there realizing the full scope of how preposterous this video is that it's got smoking Shuffling bacon and sausage down your throat every morning even when you're not hungry and then a guy Zazzing himself with cold water in the shower. I thought there is no first of all first of all who didn't That isn't that is the orc girl on Skype that's calling in first of all, first of all, who didn't? Uh, that isn't, that is the orc girl on Skype that's calling in. First of all, no one does this.

No one is sitting there in the shower every morning, goosing themselves with cold water. No one, no one in this auditorium is goosing themselves with ice cold water to get up, to go to their soul destroying job every morning. Number one, number two, they're should not gonna fucking stop because of this video. Number three, what about that fucking smoking?

I don't even know if anybody does that. Does anybody, you know, the like, it's like, oh yeah, I need that jolt of freezing cold water. Love it. Oh, okay, and if they are, they're not stopping. Like the wonder bread guy is not stopping because he saw a video on bread sexuality that he needs to stop, that he doesn't want to get

a yeast infection by cramming crumbs into the end of his dick, Lego. What is the best part of those brand new Lego sets? Oh, you open that fucking box up, pull out the little packs, right? Pull out the little packs of Lego. They're all nicely sorted, not like your fucking box, which is a bunch of garbage pieces now that you don't even know where they came from.

Oh, it was nice little sort of pack. And then, oh, and then the, the Rosetta Stone of your set, that beautiful instruction, man, you all right? Oh, with the special Lego size, nothing else with size like that, that paper. So beautiful. And Chris, look at, oh, man, sometimes it's thick as fuck, too, after Christmas, you get that $80 set. And you're like, oh, Oh man look at the size of this fucking instruction manual They got the alternative builds on the back. Oh man. If only I was if only I had to wear with all to do this There's plenty more adventure to come but I'm gonna start page by page is real in front of me It's a real manual in front of me. They fucking digitized it. Oh, no they digitized that shit you all here

Irishman opens his Mario Lego No instructions none download an app. Here's a wow a QR code fell out and kicked him in the nuts and said here Find your dad's phone. I did parents device and download this mother fucking app to get the directions printing costs and the stock and everything Oh, I think it's much worse than that. So number one You're now monetizing mom or dad's phone for the next six years. Wow. While you download the fucking instructions that they could have just printed

and put in the box number one. They happen to. Okay, yeah. Number two, good luck using it on a fucking phone. You want instructions that are about this big? Yeah. Well, I know. No, you want to sit down next to it.

You've got your pile of shit, you're looking, you can just back and forth, back and forth. Here's what I, you know. I'm like a machine and they're now I'm looking at a, now I'm looking at a fucking device. I've got to keep it from falling asleep. I've got to know the password. I've got to make sure mom is sending me pictures of her tits

while you're building this fucking child's toy. I think to be concerned about. Well, I mean, it's gonna pop up. Whatever, I got to make sure that the, uh, that my cop friend mailing, uh, text, text group that I'm on isn't sending me a bunch of you know what memes the whole time you're building your fantasy Mario land. Sure. Right. I'm locking down a device that is more me than me just because Lego didn't want to print some fucking instructions. Number two, um, number two good luck staring at instructions on a screen. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, number two, good luck, staring at instructions on a screen that's smaller than my dick.

You're gonna go cross-eyed like you're looking at a fucking ockby grab while you're building your Lego sets. They built it so, they made it interactive. So you could zoom in or out on it. So the all of the, the strategy and the counting is totally useless. If you can just zoom right in,

you know, the isometric, sometimes those things would trip you, oh, okay, gotta do a little planning here and you felt, get about yourself. And then to cap it all off, to cap it all off, when you're done, they show you the ads for the other sets with links to buy now. Yeah. So congrats, Dad.

You thought you were getting out of this under 20 bucks? You're not. Right. You get in the whole set. Your purchase has ended not in a model, but in an additional purchase in a never ending cycle of bullshit. Thanks, thanks, Pops.

Hope you got that stimulus set. Your stimulus check, because you're gonna need it. Yeah. So there you go. Everything is just about manipulation of somebody or somebody else in order to extract money from every household. It really is.

Are you excited for vote by mail? Yeah, sure. Yeah. See a lot of people saying, it's perfectly safe. I don't have you ever mailed cash through the do we do that? What's the what's the advice on mailing cash? Is that a yeah do it just crumpled up in the on the don't do right cash on the front? No I probably wouldn't do that you wouldn't do that no because somebody might fuck with it. I mean it could could be so So nobody, everybody knows that, right?

Totally, man, I mean, I can't be trusted for mail-in cash. I wouldn't do it. You wouldn't do it. No. Throw votes though. No problem. That was gonna be. I mean, where are we on the cash thing?

Oh, don't, God no. Not even a dollar. Don't even send, in fact, if you send even a birthday dollar, put it in a birthday card to protect it from the criminals at the postal service. Well, and also, you know, also you want to send a birthday card to somebody for somebody's birthday.

You don't want just a random five spot in the mail, dude. It's cram it in there. Not even five bucks can't be trusted, but you know, the soul of democracy. Ah, that's fine. Democracy, I don't believe in democracy. I don't believe in democracy. I don't believe in democracy. I don't either anymore.

I don't know, it just tickles me that everybody's so convinced that they have to pretend to be convinced that the male is in any way safe. And you know, you mail in a tax return and it's, well, you have to get it certified, delivery confirmation, like mailing in your tax to the IRS says, well, yeah, you gotta get it certified return to see everything, pretty much everything because those motherfuggers can't be trusted. Those motherfuckers can't be trusted to fall if they tripped.

Like, that's the post office. So do whatever you have to do, but don't trust them. Oh, yeah, so are we voting by, yeah, it's fine. Yeah, it'll be fine. Oh, all right. Where's it gonna go? Like, is it gonna go through? Who's, what are the people who are handling it?

What are their political persuasions? Ah, you know, I'm neutral. That's their just doing their job. Oh, okay, I can't wait. Sounds awesome. Just do it on Twitter. just hold a Twitter vote. That's not bad, what's the difference? Get everybody certified.

I mean, pretty soon it's just gonna be a, yeah, I don't know, yeah, we need to come up with dumber ways to vote. I think so too. Yeah. Like alternative, every state should try a different one. Yeah, you know. Yeah. Like alternative, every state should try a different one. Yeah. You know.

And then have like a, and then hold a, a, a, a joust. Then go, everybody go to medieval times. Yeah. And you let the people who are, have the most votes just joust to the death. Yeah. We'll see who's president and. One state just let like women only. It's a women only state. No, okay.

California, why not? Whatever. Who cares about, you know, California always votes blue anyway. like women only. It's a women only state. Okay. So voting. California. Why not? Whatever. Who cares about? You know, California always votes blue anyway. Yeah. And you could have like two dogs. Like there would be a talking Trump dog and like a talking Biden dog who would have always be confused, you know, chasing his own tail and stuff.

And that's how we would vote. Yeah. I'm, you know, I would be for that. I just think we need, we're headed toward just complete and total retard, Ville. So we just need to get there quicker. Yeah, just speed it up. We're pointed in that direction. So just, just blow it all up and do the jousting tournament.

That's what I'm saying. Oh, Merkadeurk is here. Let me get him in here. So just blow it all up and do the jousting tournament. Oh, Merkadek is here. Let me get him in here. Hey, Taylor, are you there? Hey, can you hear me? What's up, buddy? Yeah, thanks for calling in. Of course, sorry, I've had to put it off so many times. I'm going to be here.

Don't ever apologize for anything. I was on your show recently for the big 500th episode and I was enthralled by your commentary on Helen Keller, who is a big, who is a big fake apparently. Did you know about that show? It's all but proven. It's all but proven. Do you want to tell us about that a little? Also, are you excited to vote by mail? I know I am. Oh, man, it's going to be so secure. It's going to be great. You know, it's totally going to work. Nothing's going to go wrong.

Oh, nothing. It's just, like you guys were saying, I'm just so glad that we have this awesome democratic system. You know, it's, it's, it's, yeah, it's really, you hear question it. It's really working question it. Yeah. But it works so well.

So how have you been able to do this? We've seen a video of her talking. No. Oh, you're, you're, you are in for a treat, Sean. So I, I guess this would be my rage was Helen Keller. And I initially, so basically on PK, we do conspiracy theories and we'll try and convince the others. And like Kyle did the Holocaust a while ago.

I did like the Denver airport. And this time like it just wild hair at my ass. I was there was no Denver airport. Yeah, there's no Denver airport. That's a trick. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. St. Colorado Springs. But I was like, all right, Helen Keller. That would be so funny if she was actually retarded. And then after just a little bit of googling, first of all, if you put into Twitter's search bar, Helen Keller retard her. Helen Keller, you will find out that all of black Twitter's on my side already.

You'll straight up see shit where he'll be like, y'all motherfuckers really think she'd be reading. And it's like, it's hilarious. That makes a lot of sense. There's no fucking way she was doing all that stuff. Ellen Calle. And so I basically went on a deep dive. I did two conspiracies that episode.

One was about Einstein, a plagiarist fraud, and this one was called Helen Keller Secret Retard. Okay. And so there's a lot of interesting things about her. Number one, she went blind and deaf at the age of 19 months. 19 months old. Do you know what the prognosis is in 2020 for a blind deaf child?

They can't communicate, they can't do fucking anything. The entire, their entire existence is basically a caretaker trying to like put them in long-term hospice. Like, oh, just trying to keep them from freaking out. You know, they'll never be able to communicate. And so obviously 130 years ago, they weren't doing this. And before one of you fucks says, oh, but there was some other bitch 50 years before that.

No, no, she was even dumber. She also had rich parents that were trying to ranch more as the retarded are. So fuck you, I'm not believing that. And you can come to me with all the facts you want my mind is made up. So, go on. Never been done since then.

A blind deaf person has never been able to interact. Yeah, blind. Yeah, that's very difficult. Think how difficult that would be because if you're blind and deaf, so how do you even conceptualize anything? I'm touching like, I don't know. I don't know. There's really no way to do it.

I was looking up and it was like some linguist video on YouTube. And funny enough, I had to go to other video sites to find stuff about Helen Keller being a fraud. You wouldn't think that would be something that was tucked away. I will point out that people at YouTube are very, very into Helen Keller not being retarded. I will point out that your search is completely loaded though, because you're searching, you're searching for her being a fraud.

So where do you think the searches are going to go? Oh, no, Sean, you think that we go into this conspiracy thing in good faith. No, no, no. The only thing to do is try to win and convince the others that you're not. See, that is why I'm at heart. I'm not really an entertainer or a personality on that. That's yeah. No, you're like, it's cocoa all over again. It's all over again. Yeah. What's your other evidence, Taylor?

Coco thing that devastated me because somehow I saw that Helen Keller was a retard, but in my head subconscious, I was like, no, but that gorilla had it down. I know, everybody thinks that. Like they wanted to be true. So they wanted to be true, so bad that like, gorillas are somehow smart enough to like have these thoughts, which is kind of horrifying, that these animals would exist in nature like on the brink of starvation,

which is nature, like, and be able to conceptualize that. What they know for sure is that she never demonstrated any use of syntax at all. So the whole dog bites man and man bites dog. Two different right. That's the example like she never she was just as likely to say one as the other. She had no they were just words and they went together and whatever. Like all these environmental messages from her. Like oh my, you.

That's the biggest thing. Yeah, I just offer that regular gorilla. Yeah, I have that regular gorilla. It was a fucking PT Barnum circus. That's what I like, check out this man eating chicken. I was just a guy eating chicken. Now go tell your friends. Like, what you see man, it's funny.

The same thing in a way you see with Helen Keller. Like for Coco, it was a really motivated trainer that was like, hey, this is my chance to really get straight going. For Helen Keller, that's another argument I used is that her teacher and Sullivan, right, is the one who really steered her. I showed a video, I think even on the show, and I was talking to Dick and Anthony Cumian and the rest of the Pikaegang about it where she would give whole speeches Helen Keller purportedly, but she would just be moving her retard hand in the palm of Ann Sullivan real fast.

And that was supposed to believe that she's like spelling out at that, that speed with her fingers like really eloquent, very politically minded speech. Not short and yeah, how all of her all of her. And nobody else has signed the line exactly with her teacher and Sullivan. And the second that bitch and Sullivan died, wouldn't you know what Helen Keller had nothing else to say? Is that odd? Well, he's really starting to convince me because he's right.

Yeah. Do you have do you have one of her speeches that Helen Keller quote unquote sign because nobody else could have learned, you know, the whole technique and everything like that. So she was her mouthpiece. And then that was, they never did it again. No, Helen Keller. There is video of her speaking, isn't there, like, physically with, you know, her own voice, right? There is, but like, I mean, it's fucking all in front of she. It's hilarious. But yeah, like she is forming words, though, and that's been for studies and stuff nowadays.

No, watch the video for talking and just look at how retarded she is. I love it. See, you're under the mistaken impression that we're doing this in good faith. I love that. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,

no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, He was a really convinced Kyle. Kyle was like, I guess he loved the miracle worker because he was not being convinced by a lot of things. The miracle was a, do you remember, John, do you remember a junior high English teacher by the name of Mr. Party? Yeah. Okay. Yeah, he was like, he did. He was like an acid burnout.

Like, he was awesome. Yeah. But he was a cool guy or teacher, whatever. He didn't, he didn't molest Mr. Party. So, he looked like a whole good as teachers can be looked like a homeless Eric Clapton he did uh he made us watch the miracle worker for some reason yeah I I guess to just torture us well he probably just wanted to sit back and whatever do whatever in the back he's for the last for the last day you know you had to split movies up in in school and watch them over a week.

Right. He came back before the end and spoke directly to the three of us. Let me your brother and our two friends and are the four of us in the back and class. He goes, I just want to say that if there's any laughter at the end of this movie, we're going to have a big problem. Really? Yeah. How are you supposed to not laugh at that movie? The wild part.

So we were in the back just going, well, okay, what were you going to say? The four of you, the four that we're talking about, that must have been something else. And that's a great class. Yeah. See, the fact that they had to prerequisite, as a prerequisite, say, hey, no laughing at this retard, you know, like everybody, I think everybody was in on it. Yeah. Like there's a reason that hasn't happened since then. Another thing

I was the linguist online was saying, like, hey, you know, when she's doing the famous wawasine, there's no way to falsify whether she thinks that water means water, whether it means wet, whether it means cold, whether it means the sensation of something happening to her hand because she can't talk. There's no way. And so it's all up to the interpretation of Ansel. Well, one of her speeches, you read a good speech from her on the show. Yeah, here's a nice quote from Helen Keller, definitely real. Our worst foes are ignorance, poverty, and the unconscious cruelty of our commercial

society. These are the problems of blindness. These are the enemies which destroy the sight of children and workmen and undermine the health of mankind. This person can't make it to the bathroom on the wrong. How could she possibly understand the scope of just knowledge and the world on like such a macro level. Yeah. Right.

He couldn't. They didn't even have a ton of of braille books back then. And another thing about her parents, like do you think Anne Sullivan was the first teacher to stumble across this card, not at all? I think he's right. I think he's right too. He's right too. Yeah.

Yeah, I think I am. I don't think he might be right. I think he's right too. I think I am. I don't think he might be right. Parents were still rich that they had lined up teacher after teacher after teacher to train Helen because they just were so ashamed and sad about her being in the state she was. And every teacher prior to Anne Sullivan was like, I'm so sorry. She thinks it's hospice care. There's nothing to be done. It's devastating, but this is it. They eventually find Anne Sullivan and when Anne Sullivan's like, damn, goddamn, she's a Marxist too. They're like, oh,

what is she talking? And she's talking it. Actually, when did Anne Sullivan get ahold of her? Anne Sullivan got ahold of her when she was still pretty young. And so she did grow up with her for a long time. Okay. But Anne Sullivan had her her own her own CD history of, it's just, it's sketchy that all the sudden Helen Keller's got a bunch of really profound political beliefs for a blind and a person. You've never seen a cup of tea. You've never like done anything on your own. What on earth could you have to say? Sorry, but come on. I believe you. You would spend the rest of your life just doing the basics, just learning the basics of life. You know what a chair is?

What a table is, things like that. I'm pulling up a video right now. That I want to get here. Now that I want to get your take on, oh okay, Change in topic. This is the, this is the Biden vet video. Did you guys see this? Did you see it?

Did you see it? Did you see it? I mean, well, this is what, this, I kind of don't really care about the way they run these political ads, but I found this one to be so deeply offensive that I'm playing it for you now. I would drive.

I think that's a pretty good driver. This is what Biden's vetting process is, he says. He's talking about vetting his vice president. Right. And this is the video he releases, this old fuck revving up his class, revving up his fucking vet, like a trying to have like a macho big dick moment and like this is, this is everything that I despise about this generation of boomers, is in one video.

It's so fucking impossible. He, like that he nailed so perfectly what I despise about his entire, about the millions of boomers that either have this tendency or would celebrate this video. An old fuck that we currently have, that we have locked the entire economy down for, that 40 million people are going homeless for, sitting in his fucking driveway wearing a mask for pretend, because he's, I mean, he's out in the open in the middle of nowhere with

a camera crew of probably a robot. Wearing a mask for show. Showing his classic, showing, like showing a monolith to the massive amount of waste that his entire generation has forced us into. A fucking car vet, a shitty car, a shitty old car that has been replaced entirely by computers, that he's still holding this car that he wants, it's like he's having sex with his car in front of us and gloating about it. You got all of that in seven seconds?

Yeah. I got it as soon as I saw it and to top it off a bad joke. This is my vetting process, a fucking pun. Man, man, kill yourself. And I didn't even get that. I was waiting for the rest of it. I just glossed right over that Sean you got to really pay attention with these boomers to how they fuck you over very low you're so loud that's a oh my vetting pro oh it's it's a vet oh here's my vetting process not even a joke in Corvette like as a you old

fuck I fucking hate as a world touring LA based comedian, that joke is just so, it's, it's, that's below you. Oh yeah, well I'll grab low hanging fruit. That is on the ground and rotten. I don't even look down there. I'm going to play a little bit more to see if I can give through it. Formatine views. You cannot. Right.

By the way, this guy driving is the, is the cause is the beginning and the end of all traffic problems. This motherfucker on the road ever. He should have his license taken away to live taken away. I'll settle for his license to drive. There's no fucking way he should be on the road ever. And every time I see, I got two seconds into it. Every time I see anybody saying that Biden deserves a better final act than this. I got Scott Adam saying that. Oh, it's this is, oh, this is sad. This is elder abuse. Biden deserves a better. Let me explain something to you.

Final act. Every politician deserves to be drawn and quartered as their final act. Every, every politician deserves to be put in a dress and and savagely tweeted that in a public square for their final act. That's what they fucking deserve for what they've done to us by then especially deserves this. None of them, every fucking boomer deserves this. They deserve to be confused and terrified

by what's happening as they're downloaded into the fucking cloud. For all of their entitlement and horse shit that they've done to us, for every fucking auditorium video you've had to watch about taking a cold shower, how a cold shower is going to kill you, as you're on your way to your soul-crushing job, this is exactly what they deserve, that confusion is exactly what they deserve, okay, I'll blow a little more. I didn't drive a car. I'm gonna drive a car.

I'm gonna drive a car. I'm gonna drive a car. I'm gonna drive a car. I'm gonna drive a car. I'm gonna drive a car. I'm gonna drive a car. I'm gonna drive a car. I'm gonna drive a car.

I'm gonna drive a car. I'm gonna drive a car. I'm gonna drive a car. I'm gonna drive a car. I'm gonna drive a car. I'm gonna drive a car. I'm gonna drive a car. I'm gonna drive a car.

I'm gonna drive a car. I'm gonna drive a car. I'm gonna drive a car. I'm gonna drive a car. I'm gonna drive a car. I'm gonna drive a play here. My dad drive a car. What does that mean? This is yes. Oh. He was capable of pointing it down the road and not veering off into the weeds too often. Boy, could my dad drive a car? Man, fuck you. Unless your dad was whole ideology.

Unless your dad was a professional racer or something. I've never heard anybody go like, man, my dad could drive. Morons. This is just rambling. This is the 90 usable seconds out of a full day for some useful journalism. like man, my dad could drive morons. Because this is just rambling. This is the 90 usable seconds out of a full day for some use for journalism major filming him. Boy could my dad drive a car.

Man, fuck you. My dad drive a car. You know, this is better than when he got on that and word loop. So we're going to keep. We're going to use this clip. Yeah. My son pays child support. Oh, I know.

Every time we vote, like, there should be, I mean, we established democracy has its problems. But if there was like a third choice every time where it's like, no, total exile. Yeah, the never to return that would be a pretty good system. The loser is going to get shot. The winner's president, the loser we shoot. How about that? We might shoot the winner too. Yeah, we win, we never, you never know Ferrari set a steak knives fired out of a cannon. Yeah, yeah, right. And we should be able to have a prom to voting whenever. Oh, whoa, that's what we're giving recall. On four and eight other countries. That's a lot of money we're handing out when we still

enough healthcare, we don't have our own stuff. I think you're going to Madagascar. I think you're headed and we fix it again. Yeah, go. 10 Presidents a year. Go make friends with a lemur. See if the share of the name goes. Watch the run. Stand in front here.

And this music, like the music makes me sick. How can American made vehicles no longer be out there? Because you sent them to China. You did. I mean, you did. The 21st century market. I mean, you fucking personally did it. You do electric vehicles. And by the way, they tell me, and I'm looking forward

if it's true to driving one, they're making electric Corvette and go 200 miles an hour. Couldn't even fucking say the sentence. By the way, looking forward to, they're telling me that it could make a Corvette drive 200 miles and I, where the fuck are you driving? 200 miles an hour, motherfucker in your dreams? I hope you're the grave. Man, I hope nowhere.

I hope that I'm not this obnoxious when I'm 70 to like kids. You will be far, far worse than this. Oh yeah. And fucking this. This is so obnoxious. You're setting a new, I mean, yeah. You're starting from such a high level. I mean, you know, it gets, Sean, you are,

you buy chain link last week? No, I did not. It went up 70% since we talked, since I told everybody to buy it last week, it went up 70%. That's the greatest investment advice in the history of the world. In one week, you made 70% on your money

I fucking told everyone to buy chain link what do you say this week? I don't have any advice this week invest in patreon.com Slash the Dix show that's because that will make apparently that's a winner in the long run and the short run a week right 70% Go ahead Taylor. What were you gonna say? Oh, saying is that a cryptocurrency? I don't have any money on that stuff. I have no idea how it works. Yeah, it's cryptocurrency. Oh, he's got a little spin on the mic there. Let me see what else I got here. The Nazi baseball solution's really bothering me

about Joe Biden. What a piece of shit. That's really out. When did he, when did he like become this retarded? Do you think it was while he was in office and he sort of slipped away. Because he seems way worse now than even a few years ago. Yeah. I mean, it could, when you start, you know,

all of a sudden, you just notice somebody's not as sharp. It almost seems to happen overnight, but it just, you know, it just happens. All of a sudden, you're like, oh, okay, that's that. They're just not as sharp anymore. Yeah. Did you guys... Did you guys... Did you guys...

Did you guys... Did you guys... Did you guys... Did you guys... Did you guys... Did you guys... Did you guys... Did you guys...

Did you guys... Did you guys... Did you guys... Did you guys... Did you guys... Did you guys... Did you guys... Did you guys...

Did you guys... Did you guys... Did you guys... Did you guys... Did you guys... Did you guys... Did you guys... Did you guys... Did you guys... Did you guys... Did you guys... Did you guys... Did you guys... Did you guys... Did you guys... Did you guys... Did you guys... Did you guys... Did you guys... Did you guys... Did you guys... Did you guys... Did you guys... Did you guys... Did you guys... Did you guys... Did you guys... Did you guys... Did you guys... Did you guys... Did you guys... Did you guys... Did you guys... Did you guys... Did you guys... Did you guys... Did you guys... Did you guys... Did you guys... Did you guys... Did you guys... Did you guys... Did you guys... Did you guys... Did you guys... Did you guys... Did you guys... Did you guys... Did you guys... Did you guys... Did you guys... Did you guys... Did you guys... just get it over with. Talk about how big a dick is. Don't talk about cars. Don't talk about driving 200 miles an hour. Don't talk about your fucking dad driving. Just talk about, don't talk about your dad's dick. Just talk about your dick. I'm not a dad. I'm not a dad. My dad could fuck, I'll tell you.

And I hope I get an electric dick one day. I'm gonna get an electric dick one day. And I'm gonna fuck God with it. I'm Joe Biden. I'm Epstein's Island. Is he still around? Do you guys see this two plus two equals five thing? I did, but it didn't pull me in, so I didn't look into it.

It didn't pull me in. Well, this is the, this is the newest wave of mind control and brain rot that we're being forced to, that we're being forced to argue with. That we're being tricked into arguing with, which is ultimately a waste of time, I think actually we're being tricked into arguing like just everything. Yeah. Everything.

And I think we're tricking ourselves. Yeah. This moron, the keyon got in a fight with this idiot that this dude on Jeopardy Arthur something who's saying two plus two equals five. Yeah. Apparently there's a whole mob of morons who are on board on this. Like the very, they're so smart, they're so smart, they're dumb again, end of the section of the bell curve,

which is a very special section of the bell curve. It really is. Like we know the, we know the, the left half, which just, is always, always drilling us down for cash. Like well, you know, we gotta get something for you guys together. We need like arts and crafts or something. Like, we make puttasin' for some of you.

We're gonna occupy. You need to be occupied with something. Like, there's a lot of people in prison that enjoy it. They, oh, no. Yeah. The relationships, the society in there. The structure. Yeah, the structure.

We got a nice prison for you guys. We got some arts and crafts for you guys. But then there's the other section slightly above them. The so smart, you're stupid again, section. You got the workers above, just above the prison guys and then right above them is the so smart you're dumb again with two plus two equals five. They're arguing that there is no universal answer

to two plus two and that it's not objectively true in all situations. They're falsifying it by saying two plus two because the two is the number two does not account for what is possibly there, but not visible or not able to be. Dude, fuck that reddit tier. I fucking love science bullshit. That is absolute nonsense. Two plus two equals four, you're an asshole

for making a scene about it. And two, that's just, that's really lame. I thought it was more of a joke making fun of a couple people. But there's actual people- They're really saying it. Let me try to find one of their things. Well, something start as a joke or satire

and then they move into, oh no, people really believe this. And it's like teachers. Like, this is teachers and it is teachers and educators, professors, academics, experts, trying to push the idea that there's always something more than meets the eye and that there is no objectable fact by destroying what is objectable for what is objective fact like that fucking comic with two guys looking at the six or the nine on the ground saying oh from my perspective like motherfucker someone put that number

there on purpose and they knew what it was supposed to be it's not oh wow I just saw this symbol it's a nine to me it's a six to you know somebody put it there and they meant it, they put it there for a fucking reason, like there's six miles away from a big fucking cliff. Some things have answers. Mm-hmm. Yeah.

Not everything is open to interpretation and that seems to be the most prevalent line of thinking these days where it's like, well, things can have many answers. Like, no, some things have one answer. That's poor. That's pretty much it. It's almost just a continuation of the deconstructivist shit where it's like, this word actually means everything and nothing. But you know what? None of those blue checks on Twitter want to live in a house like that has an architect and an engineer who doesn't abide by two plus two equals four.

Do you want to live in that house? Do you want to live in that world? Obviously not because we all know what reality is. If some crazy person put a gun to your head and was like, it's two plus two equals four, you'd say yes, I know I was meaming. I was trying to get five again, motherfucker. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, that's crazy.

Ah, the poverty blah. All right, here's another, here's another good one. There's Nazi salute. Hi, do you see this, Sean? Who? There's baseball guy doing what is it? Nazi salute. Ah, here it is.

Was it an on purpose one or like they catch you in a weird hand position one? I think they caught him in a weird hand position, but yeah, I mean, this guy had to fucking, this guy had to apologize for you. Tell me, he wants this video. Okay. Everybody's going insane right they have to do elbow bumps these grown men have to do elbow bumps for something I don't know why they compulsively have to touch each other at all, but Apparently they do so they've switched to the extremely stupid and emasculating elbow bump

Yeah, and I think this guy finally cracked and just Well you look at it. There's the Nazi salute. That guy telling him to pull it back in and he goes, oh, whoops, yeah, you're right, I did do that. How dumb. Here it is in slow motion. Yeah.

Does it look like anything to you? It looks like a Nazi salute to me. Do you think he's doing a purpose? I mean, it's not to present his elbow. You don't think so? Not like, it's a straight arm like that. Do you think he's doing a Nazi salute on purpose or an accident there? I have no idea.

I don't know if he's, I have no idea. He's fucking right, that's what it looks like to me or he was like, wow, that ball really took off. You know, like us. But I mean, you should be his PR guy. That would have worked. Maybe. I don't know. People want you to get that good out of here.

Man, I, well, someday I want to hit a ball 200 miles an hour, just like God. Right into a court that's windshield. I think he's just making it like he's doing it dumb like motion. I don't know what he's, I mean, that, that looks like a Nazi salute to me. Well, it is a Nazi salute. Yeah, but do you think he's doing it like as I have no, how would I know how he whether he's doing it or not or best or not?

Yeah, people know. I've never said what is, yeah, this man's idea of a joke is to do a Nazi salute on television and a baseball game. I couldn't go. I can't go that. I don't know what's in his head. I'm assuming he's gotten black or you know, teammates or you know, whatever.

I'm assuming he's not stupid or you know teammates or you know whatever. I'm assuming he's not stupid enough to do it. He's doing a Nazi salute in front of a baseball team. Is that a reasonable assumption? No, it's not reasonable, but that doesn't mean it didn't happen. That's true, I guess. Well, maybe he did fuck him. Hang him. Get rid of him. You can't, I don't think you can convict somebody, you know, certainly you can because it's being done all the time, but I'm not going to convict him for what I don't know is in his head. Let's see if I got anything else here. Oh man, the cops showed up and executed this dude.

Oh, no, I can't. For a noise complaint. Yeah. Did you see that? Did you see that? Yeah, Yeah. I saw that clip. I watched it a few times and, you know, it's pretty, it's pretty beyond the pale outrageous. I do know that he had a gun on him, but it was like, well, yeah, that's your, that's your, right? A bunch of issues in his neighborhood recently, like, break ins and whatnot, but,

you know, you probably know more than I do. What's your take on it? I mean, bro, you don't need an excuse to have a gun. Like the cops, I don't know why cops, so cops showed up to this guy's house for noise complaint. I'm always complaining. Neighbor call then said there's a noise complaint. Cops show up.

First of all, anybody could be a cop. You know, like cop, it doesn't, this idea that cops are somehow these extra legal authorities that you have to treat differently than a normal person is so diverse to me. Like that a cop shows up in your house and you're like, you're not, I don't give a fuck who you are. Get the fuck off my property.

Unless you have like a warrant, get the fuck off my property. I don't care if you have some stupid Halloween costume. I don't care if you dressed up like a fucking stripper, get the fuck off my property. It's 10 p at, mail me a ticket. How about that? Email me a ticket. How about that? Email me a ticket.

If I'm being loud, you guys are the last people that are gonna turn into Donahue on the scene and solve my problems between me and my neighbor. Just send me a fucking ticket in the mail. No reason for you to be here. No reason for you to be armed at all. Which is in my opinion, the entire point of the, of the fentanyl Floyd protests is that our attitude toward the police and

willing and, uh, willingness to just accept them as authority figures when they show up and when they show up wagging their dicks around with loaded guns to, to situations that would never, would never necess never, would never need that. There's no reason ever for the police to show up in your house for a noise complaint with it unless someone is in the middle, unless someone is in the middle of being attacked, there's no reason for them to be there

at all except to fill out forms. Do you know what I'm saying? Like they're not there to stop crimes, they're there to fill out the fucking forms after the crime is yeah take a back to investigate it that yeah yeah the mentality of the police that they should that they need to show up to a noise complaint with loaded weapons is what is the and is the entire fucking problem the entire the entire problem from jump street

uh... somebody tried to spend a $20, a counterfeit $20 bill. So take it up, take it up with them. Don't sell them the shit then. Have insurance. Do literally anything else then call the police because they're fucking, they show up to arrest people or kill people. That's it. That's it. That's the owner. Good for is arresting people. Hey, we heard about a noise complaint. You got any drugs in there? You got any drug? What's going on? What's going on in there? You got to be so loud at 10.30 on a Friday night. You got any drugs?

Because we're looking for drugs. Because we need to make a rest. Because that's our whole fucking, that's our entire purpose. Oh, and second thought, I smell drugs. I'm coming in. You know, I know I'm playing from an annoyed neighbor, resulted in cops shooting and killing a man within five seconds of him opening his front door. Five seconds.

That is one of the most outrageous ones I've seen. I mean, we know why that one's not going to get a lot of play and media attention because it was a white guy who got shot. Yeah. And that's just not very, that's not, that's not in Vogue right now. But that one and did you see the one in the Vegas hotel years, a couple of years ago? Where he's trying to pull his pants up? Yeah, he's crawling on the floor and he's like,

put your hand behind your head, crawl towards us. And he's like, what are you hoping to do? Hands behind your head, crawl towards him. There's just, just no fucking reason for them. Like 99% can be thrown right at, there's no reason they should be responding to this. And all I see is crazy how situations get escalated so quickly. And five seconds.

And then just, yeah, or sometimes less. Ryan Whitaker opened his door holding a gun in his right hand, which is legal in Arizona. Who fucking cares if it's legal? This is fucking house. Like, if you showed up at a guy's house, it wouldn't say in the article he had a gun which is legal. Like, what are you doing at the guy's house?

What the fuck are you doing? I don't care if you're the police. What the fuck are you doing there? But it made the cops fear for their lives. However, the cops didn't see him remove it from his waistband. No. However, the cops never gave him a chance to put the gun down. So it was in his waistband or it was in his right hand.

This says right hand. Yeah. The cops never gave him a chance to put the gun down. So it was in his waistband or it was in his right hand. This says right hand. Yeah. It was never given a chance to put the gun down which he appeared to be trying to do. When one cop shot him in the back three times. So he wasn't facing them. So he was gonna do a trick shot. He was gonna shoot it off of the cast iron.

The cast iron skillet and the kitchen and ricochet and hit the guy right in the head. I mean, I know, but I'm in the shot him in the back three times because that, I mean, he's a dead eye from there, right? Three times. So the first shot was, I mean, well, you know, fuck an imagine that pop off. But there's a gun. Pop, pop, pop, pop. The cops are taught to shoot in, but like I know, like the LA Sheriff's Department, at least a one time, no, well, twice, twice in reassess, twice and reassess. Yeah, in two shot bursts.

And I don't know if LAPD is different. I was told that by a shooting instructor. Now what happens in the field, we've seen from some of these videos, they just keep squeezing it off till it's empty because they're fucking panicking. They're terrified. Sure. I know what I'm terrified when a guy with a gun is walking away from me, that's really when I'm, that's really when the pulse is pounding.

That's curious. Why did you guys shoot him? Whitaker's girlfriend, Yeld, as she stepped into the doorway, he just pulled a gun on us, ma'am. Phoenix police officer Jeff Cook said, because it's dark and someone just knocked on the door, she responded, you fucking moron. You fucking moron. That, you're fucking moron. That's great.

It's just a shame that in the end, he died of COVID anyway. Yeah, you can you believe that? It's murder. It's murder enough. If I got to read, if I got to read one more hot take of how fentanyl Floyd was like, I like robbed some woman or pastor was high on mat.

No care. Are you guys fucking insane? There is, the cops are out of control. Out of fucking control, the way police act in this country is out of control. Out they should never be around these situations. What's up Taylor? What do you think about the,

like so what are you taking on? I know a lot of people are talking about defunding the cops and all that shit. Yeah, like fucking the very anti-cop. What do you think is actual good solution man? So I got a I got some stats in here hold on let me bring them I got some stats on police police interaction with people because the less there's less crimes today now than ever but there's more police actions there's less people doing crimes but there's

more interactions with the police now than ever. I think you're crimes gone up pretty significantly with the riots and such. No, I mean, I'm down trend. Yeah. Crime is steadily falling. Isn't some of that how they manipulate the statistics, though, too? Like, I mean, there's never a way to get on a stat. Here, no, I guess that's for you right now. Crime is steadily falling, but Americans don't believe it. This is from 538. Share of respondents who believed US crime had increased from year to year.

It's about 60%. It started at 100 in the 90s, and now it's in the 60s. So more than half of people believe crime is increasing. Victims of violent crime per 1,000 people or property crime per 1,000 households. Yeah, so it's okay, so it's per capita. So yeah, look, it's down to almost,

the violent crime is down to like nothing. Yeah. Per capita, what is that? Maybe 20. Well, I mean, but it's per- 20 for 1,000. Yeah, I mean, they are, no, it's not really per capita,

but I mean, it's a relative thing. So it's, I get it, no, it's not really per capita, but I mean, it's a relative thing. So it's, I get it. Yeah, it's falling and it's an apples to apples comparison. Yeah. And I do think cops, I think that police belong here, but the, like the little rinky dink shit that they have to do, domestic violence, drug stuff, stuff like that is ruining, is ruining. Well, what do you think is the right way to handle it? Just have like a different class of officer code.

Do you know that? Make all drugs legal. Make all drugs legal, send out a, if you want to, if you want to stop drug use, send out a social worker. But all drugs should be legal. I couldn't even fucking watch Dread last night because the whole movie is predicated on Dread Busting a Drug Ring. And I'm like, if I was in Meg with City One, I would be doing this slow mo.

Dreads a fucking bad guy. Are you talking about the new one? Or the new one? The new one. That's a good movie. And it is such a great movie, but I was watching that side of like, I can't get out of my head with watching them do a drug bust.

I don't wanna watch that again. It's just, I just like the whole look, the sets, everything like that. That's a fucking cool movie. Yeah it is. Oh, I got, this one's pretty good. KFC for chicken justice. Do you guys see this?

Oh, boy. Oh, my God. Yeah, I think they like made an ad where it's a chicken leg standing up and then like the Black Lives Matter logo fist is behind it. You guys. It was like, if you, if like, I don't know, church's chicken sent me as an undercover double agent into KFC and I got this approved in their marketing department, it would have been a resounding success for pop-up as the rest.

It's so bad that's bad. It's so fucking tone deaf. It's a drumstick that has a spotlight on it and the shadow is a black power. I don't have any to comment on this. It's so terrible. KFC, visit nailed it. Happy Emancipation Day. I don't know what that is and dot TT. Apparently, that's a holiday. The emancipation day. I feel like holidays are being included and made up at a rapidly increasing rate now. Yeah, it's a global holiday thing. It's a global economy, so we get all the holidays now.

I don't think Sam Hyde would even be this offensive. No, no, honestly, he would have been a little more subtle. And then it's shaking away. I know. Look at this thing. I know look at this thing. I know the shadow the specter of black power and reflected in the fucking from chicken drumstick. Oh my god. It was ominous.

It doesn't make me want chicken. I think they could have had like heckle and jekyll and the old one. He was workloads. They used the extra crispy recipe, which nobody fucking likes. I don't want to. It's not. You're right.

Yeah. Terrible. I had to pull it up again. This looks like a right wing Twitter joke that they would try. It's like a right. You're a forechand when they voted in. It's true. You do you do and they're like,

this, we're going to vote in Hitler did nothing wrong. Yeah. Like a mountain do. Yeah. This looks like a forechand bit. I think you're really proud of this. Yeah. Muster.

All right, Taylor. Get out of here, man. Thank you for calling in. Do you have anything that makes you a rage? Oh, Helen Keller and people not believe in she's regarded. Yeah. Do you mind? I get you. You're having me on again, man.

I really appreciate it. I got to do this more often if you guys, you're great. You make that, you make P.K.A. I love you. You're really hilarious. I'm glad they brought you on. I'm glad you're here, man. And I'm going to look up a lot of Helen Keller shit tonight.

It's a fraud. Like, no, no lie. Like I am really interested in this because it's, there's some very obvious points that you just don't consider. Yeah. Yeah. Because you never think about it. But hey, I totally hope I'm going to see you guys a nice Google doc with all my info. I'll send that to Dick and print it out for you. All right.

All right. This one's for a bitch. It should have said this, this one's for Floyd. It's for Floyd. I'm excited. You're like, how can you get worse than this? I don't like it. I know they have to say a sorry. If I did this, I'd excited. I'm excited. I'm excited. I'm excited. I'm excited.

I'm excited. I'm excited. I'm excited. I'm excited. I'm excited. I'm excited. I'm excited. I'm excited.

I'm excited. I'm excited. I'm excited. I'm excited. I'm excited. I'm excited. I'm excited. I'm excited.

I'm excited. I'm excited. I'm excited. I'm excited. I'm excited. I'm excited. I'm excited. I mean, this is now can't see I think it's owned by Trinidad and Tobago. So I got a little little bit of a benefit of the doubt. Oh, I already know. Okay. I was gonna say thank you very much, Rev. Me on all the ideas.

I'll talk to you later. Thanks, bud. See you. Yeah. Okay. Trinidad and Tobago, there's no way it was run here, right? That is that where you say that? No.

Let me put it out on their Twitter though. Still. I've got a Lancet study that says, um, Is that where you say that? No. We put it out on their Twitter though. Still. Ha ha ha. I've got a Lancet study that says that says the lockdown did nothing. That's a medical journal, by the way. Hold on. Let me pull it up. Didn't get much press.

Yeah. Surprise, surprise. Well, the Lancet has a lot of controversies. Wow, yeah, can imagine. No, I mean, it's like in the past. Oh, like it's broad. Yeah, things like that. All right, let's write it off then.

Well, not always time. In our study, an increasing number of days to border closures was associated with a higher caseload and more restrictive public health measures, such as a full lockdown, compared to partial or curfew-only measures, were associated with an increase in the number of recovered cases per million.

The findings suggest that more restrictive public health practices may indeed be associated with less transmissions and better outcomes. However, in our full analysis, full lockdowns and widespread COVID testing were not associated with reductions in the number of critical cases or overall mortality. So critical and people are still dying. So the lockdowns didn't prevent any deaths is what it says. It may have presented, it shows that it prevented transmission. Transmission

shows that it did not change the deaths. That seems weird though, doesn't it? Not to me. No. Because I, as I have said this entire time, I think a lot more people than we knew had it. And it was just when the testing ramped up that we figured that out so that the deaths were, that the deaths were always gonna happen no matter what.

Well, it is one of the last things I was listening to somebody on was they were saying that they think now somewhere between 25 and 40% of cases are asymptomatic or nearly asymptomatic where you can chalk it up to allergies and stuff and that's, yeah. Oh, interesting. Yeah, the Lancet is, yeah, it is a medical journal, but I was surprised because I've researched them

and I was surprised how many controversies they have and like how somebody not watching the store or just printing kind of, I mean, maybe reckless or things that didn't pass muster, things that were like non-pure, it's interesting, because that's what I do. I always, I see something, I go, I wonder if that's true. Passing muster with Sean Jacobs.

That's your squeeze, really. For a hit. But I always want to try to trace it back to where it came from. Yeah. But anyway. But this is something to keep in mind. Oh, yeah, I'm also it's

sure, it's possible. It didn't do anything. It's possible. It didn't prevent any deaths. Uh, here and no one will say it, of course, if that happens. Uh, here's another one. The pandemic may have caused 40 million Americans to lose their homes. Yeah. No, okay. Just as I know I'm just thinking the last time a bunch of Americans lost their homes. What was the How many people lost their homes in the in the housing in the crash in 2008? You know how many eventually I'm curious like how many people lost homes in sub Prime melt down sub prime melt that exactly How the fine seven Seven million, I was saying.

Between 2007 million lost their homes. Wow, that's actually a lower number than I would have thought. Well, because everybody stayed in their homes. You remember, it was hard to kick people out. Well, it was, and really banks, most banks don't want to take properties back because they have to carry them. Like, and they have to have to market them.

And you end up, they end up at auction or something and you never get, it's like you're just, they usually try to work out the mortgage. I think the deaths from, I had a stat for the number of suicides that are skyrocketing to, or suicide attempts. It's like a year's worth of suicide attempts in one month. So, you know, just something, just food for thought.

It locked down, didn't prevent any deaths, maybe. Yeah, maybe 40 million people are gonna be out of house. 40 million homeless. Ah, you know, it's ugly. But Biden's got his vet. Yeah, Biden's got his vet. Okay, let me talk to, let's talk to the orc girl. They're gonna put lithium in the water.

Did you read about that? No. What do you think about that? I don't think they're gonna put lithium in the water. That's what they said about fluoride shun. I don't think they're gonna put fluoride in the water though. Lithium in the water, mandatory vaccinations. I fucking promise you that.

Lithium-laced drinking water could curb suicide rates. So let me explain to you how this is going to work, all right? Let me just give you a little preview of the future of 2021 for you. Everyone's going to be out of a home, right? The bank or Jeff Bezos will own the entire country. They're going to have to put put lithium in the gutter water. Yes, people will be drinking out of the gutter, eating bug flour, and the gutter water will be laced with lithium

because of the out of control suicide epidemic. I fucking promise you that's, I promise the suicide epidemic is coming, and that they will try to fight it the dumbest way possible by lacing what you drink with lithium. Lithium is a mood stabilizer. Like it's not an anti-depressant. It's not an SSRI. It's not, you know what I mean?

It's the oldest approved mood stabilizer. Treats like, you know, what they used to buy poll or what it used to be called manic depression. Yeah, it's not for somebody who's depressed. That's not the place you go. You have to get a job to fix the kind of depression that people are going to be battling with over the next couple of years. Yeah, it's not for somebody who's depressed, that's not the place you go. You have to get a job to fix the kind of depression that people are gonna be battling with over the next couple of years. That's what's gonna fix it.

It will be forced lithium, lithium forced into the drinking water, mandatory vaccinations. I fucking promised they're doing that, mandatory vaccinations to go to school, which we all teamed up against the anti-vaxxers for, turnout they were fucking right the entire time. Everybody forced, everybody made fun of the anti-vaxxers so much that they eventually had to do it

to go to school. Remember that? Yeah. Now, congratulations. We just set the stage for doing it with what will be an untested COVID vaccine. It's not untested. It will be.

No, they're testing it right now. Do you remember when they did it, this to us about SARS in the 90s? They tested a vaccine and then made 40 million Americans did the untested vaccine. And like 4,000 people died from it and sued the government. Do you remember that? I do. Yeah, they're going to do it again. I do.

I do. Because they're fucking stupid. They're just as stupid as they were in the 90s. They're gonna fuck it up again. That's 2021 for you. And by Chainlink. All right, let's talk to you. Yeah. I need a coke real quick. Me too, honey.

Do we have coax? Oh, thank you. See, I kind of just willed that to happen. Ha ha. Oh, hey, Dave. Thank you. Here is a quote from an infectious disease expert from UCLA Public Health in February, saying fear spreads a lot faster than the virus, and a mask only makes you feel better.

Yeah, I mean, I can see that. That's what science. It's so, you know, we do a lot of things to keep the kind of the panic down too. I mean, it's, they still, I mean, they still figure that probably 60 plus percent of Americans will get it or will have, it's, it's, it's coming, you know, it's been 150 days since 15 days to stop the curve or 15 days to stop the spread. That's one of remind everybody of that. 150 days since 15 days to stop the curve or 15 days to stop the spread. Just want to remind everybody of that. That's all. So everyone doesn't go insane for not hearing it.

Hey, Dick and Sean Big fan writing in support of the initially confusing story of the either bisexual or exhausted heterosexual man who wrote in episode 218 detailing his strategy of boning men because women are too much work as Dick correctly implied latent bisexuality is actually a superpower because it allows you to get your balls emptied by someone else without needing to deal with a woman in order to achieve it, which has always been one of the greatest downsides of getting laid. Taking away the collective power of women from gatekeeping the vage by circumventing it all the way, by circumventing it, all the way around to the male asshole

is the greatest wartime tactic since Operation Uranus performed in 1942 installing red. I mean, thanks and go fuck yourself, David. I guess it would be a superpower. That's the gesture too, exhaust, mental exhaustion. Yeah. From dealing with women is gonna turn a lot of guys gay.

Right, which I support, gonna have to add something, right, gonna have to add something else to the water. To keep men straight or yeah, whatever. Whatever way you want it to go. I'm dead serious. I think guys are gonna start going gay just because of the fucking fatigue

of dealing with depression and women. And that the internalized shame of that will make them kill themselves. Man, I don't, like going, I don't know if you can like go gay. Yeah, you can. Yeah, man. Go to, talk to prisoners.

You can 100% like people are not as straight as they claim. Well, no, it's women are much more likely to act on it than or be open to it than men are. Yeah. Because men is like, no, no, it's women are much more likely to act on it than or be open to it than men are. Yeah. Because men are, no, no way. Here's the type of exhaustion I'm talking about with women. This is from some bitch today. Women in their 20s lack the ability to consent to sexual activity with men in their 30s. I disagree. It can't be genuinely consensual because men in their 30s and especially their 40s have all the power It is therefore a highly dubious almost almost pedophilic Relationship this is what this that will make you gay. Yeah, I can I take back everything I said

100% that's That's actually with you. That's a decent percentage. There are a decent percentage of people who think that way. Women. Yeah. Well, men, yeah, men too, both. Well, I think Vito's,

well, I think they don't want to work. Because women don't want to compete. They get, they hit 30, you know what, I'm tired of competing. I'm just going to try to guilt men into thinking they're fucking pedophiles, instead of competing with younger chicks by being wilder and easier to fuck.

Well, I think very, very easy to just compete, but you want to be fucking lazy and call us pedophiles. Okay, we're going to go gay. How do you like that now? Just give me the, give me the fucking, give me the cock and lithium, line it up. I'm fucking done dealing with you. I'm done dealing with you bitches. Yeah, Vito's had a good point last week where it's like, okay, like you're, you're a woman

who's empowered and can make your choices and all that, or you're a victim in every circumstance. A child. Yeah, no matter if you're 28. Like, so what's, it's just, it seems like a, it's convenient for them. Whichever way they have it, it's just out of convenience. Yeah, I get it, you don't wanna compete.

You don't work. You don't work. I got it, I understand it. You just want guys to be into you no matter what. You don't work. I got it, I understand it. You just want guys to be into you no matter what. Almost pedophiles. It's like horseshoes and pedophiles.

What are you talking about? Okay, let me talk to you. Let me. Buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh. I mean, how are you doing? Oh, I'm doing great. How are you? Oh, my God. I love it.

All right. Let me, I got to line up this video so that everybody can see. Please explain what the hell you're doing to all the listeners and watchers for me. Oh, you want to explain what I'm doing? Hell, I don't know what I'm doing on any given day. But hey, you know, I'll try. Go for it. I, well, I'm currently dressed as an orc.

I'm Amy Mercury. I am a fetish model and also the creator of a webcomic called Orc Girl. A fetish model. And so guys who are into orcs, right? Sorry, what was that? Guys who are into orcs are into you. Obviously, that's what you, that's your trade. How did you get into orking?

Well, you know, I've been a fetish model for about six years and a couple of years back, I decided to start this web comic or girl. And I thought to myself, because a lot of fans of my fetish content also liked my comic. And I thought, you know, I'd be kind of interesting if I did a video where I turned into an orc.

And I got two years ago, I, then I'm doing special effects accrued. I mean, I don't have a Hollywood budget. I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I think I wish I was into it to be out like I wish I was into orcs, you know what I'm feeling well plus It's the idea you don't forgive the the effects. Oh, yeah. Yeah, right? But you know, I did kind of borrowed from like old monster films like like the original wolf man We're like you'd see it. They just kind of did like a long dissolve Across the screen you'd see the hair growing and stuff like that That's basically what I did but with green paint instead. Do you have a boyfriend who's into orcs?

I have a boyfriend but he is not necessarily into orcs. However, he is supportive of me working out. Sure. What a waste, right? Like some chick has huge, let's like, what a waste. Like, is some chick has huge tits and she's dating a guy who's not really into huge tits. You're like, come on man. huge tits, and she's dating a guy who's not really into huge tits. You're like, ah, come on, man. I'm gonna give it up to somebody else.

You know? So what do you have like a bunch of orbiters and stuff who are really into orcs? As a fetish model? I mean, starting out, I wouldn't have said that I would have that particular audience. I just kinda do a general fetish. I do, and everything from more of an Ella content, to foot fetish, to well, you know,

dressing up as an orc. And so I think a lot of my fans were just kind of impressed by the fact that I did it. And I will say it's kind of funny. While I've had a lot of fans of my fetish content, ultimately find a orc girl, my comic, I've had a lot of fans of my fetish content, ultimately find a work girl in my comic, I've actually gotten people who read my comic and then found out I was a fetish model. Do you think that's where my orc audience comes from? Does the orc fetish include like orc talking? Like do you talk normal in the fetish world? Do these guys want you to talk normally or is it up? Yeah, rough it up like movie orcs

Well, I mean I got a kind of a deep voice anyways. I think that helps me But you know, no, they just want me to talk normal All right, you have do you have news for us? I love it. I love the work. We had a guy who likes having sex with bread on last week. I watched that episode actually, because that guy is kind of well known amongst the artist community. I've known a lot of my friends who are draw fetish art have had him as a client. Sure. He's like a human ATM machine. I was talking to this. He's curious.

I was talking to this, I don't know what to call him, like a right wing finance guy about the bank this week. And he was kind of going into this process that he does of making a mental model of people, like that people can be explained and he likes to, like, have them, like, figure out what makes them tick and I was like let me explain just like I'm coming from I want I want somebody to do business with me guy called in and he wants to have sex with bread So that bother you for right what can tell me out with that one

You know, I do all kinds of fetish content like literally everything you could possibly think of under the sun is a fetish. You know, the moon's a fetish. Yeah. The moon's a fetish. The first thing about feet. What are the feet guys like? Like what's their deal? How was that? Probably anything. What are the feet guys like? Like what are they? What is their deal? What can you describe them to us? You know, honestly, like you think they'd all be like Peter Laurie like, yes, but they're not, you know, they're actually like these really like chill guys. They're just normal everyday people and they just really like it that somebody's saying, it's okay, I have content for, I have content for that, you know, I can cater to that.

I can stop that with Delithium, like Peter Laurie. That's a great reference. Who's Peter Laurie? Peter Laurie is who it's to Ren is based on that that he's been caricatured through cartoons for years oh sure he was always the guy with the like they had drawn with like really big kind of bug eyes and he talked like Igor you know like you know all the time like you've probably seen him represented in curtains. Okay, so if you're not watching the video,

what you get at Patreon, I can hop slash the Dixho for only a dollar. Orc Girl is painted green, like the incredible Hulk. She's got what is red and brown hair, and she's wearing things that she sounds kind of funny. She's wearing like reverse orc tusks. What's guess, but she's making that pretty clearly for that. That's touch.

Yeah, right. Practice. Practice. I'm sure. Oh, whoa, she's very, very bound, very busty for an orc as well. Lovely, lovely orc. I can see why people are into it. Okay, orc girl, do you have news for us, please?

Let's see, is this where I need to read the news articles? All right, let me bring it up real quick. And where's your fetish site so people can go check you out? Oh, yes. I post on Cliffs4Sale.com. I have two different stores. I have one called Amy's Kinky Castle

where you could see a lot of my orc content. And I have another one called the Twisted Treehouse. I also have many of it. I have a porn-hook channel as well. So, and you can find me on Twitter at any mercury that's any with an eye. Okay, any mercury. Sean, I'm getting like really,

idiocracy vibes is a very specific, when Frito is bathing in the very beginning and he's watching that woman cut steak with a steak knife, I think that clip is so underappreciated because that is what pornography has become in the future. Like that wasn't a joke about censorship, it was, I'm into feet, specifically, I'm into chicks cutting a steak with their feet, and that's what I bait to. That is what, this is like the orc porn. You know what I mean?

It's so specific. Yeah, well, yeah. Some things are very specific. Where I got a lot of, oh, go ahead, go ahead, sorry. Oh, no, no, I'm done. Oh, well, I think where it came from for me is that I've done a lot of transformation fetish where I turn into things.

So I think that a lot of guys who are into my org videos, they weren't so much necessarily into the org element, so much as the whole process of transformation, because transformation is actually a pretty big fetish. Okay, what is that? Explain all of that to me, please. It's basically where cute girls turn into something else. Okay. You know, think of like an animal. It's basically where cute girls turn into something else. Think of one of the most popular ones would be. Well, think of Pinocchio, Disney's Pinocchio, or they turn into donkeys. That is actually a very popular scene among

Transformation Fetishes. I have done phone calls, like I'm also a phone sex operator, where I've had people request that I reenact that scene for them over the phone, like voice acting, and I'm fully able to work at all. Wow. The artist's work.

Oh my God, I'm turning into a donkey. Yeah, that's basically, or I've, I had one custom video that, that you seen the movie The Witches it was done like the early 90s with Angelica Houston in it. And 80s my girlfriend's nodding her head, but I haven't seen that. It's kind of a cheesy 80s movie. I loved it, but it's basically where these witches decide they're going to turn kids into mice.

That's kind of like the whole plot. And our main character, little boy gets turned into a mouse. And I had a guy who bought me all the equipment for it, like ears, nose, everything, and paid for me to do a custom video of me kind of doing my interpretation of that scene of turning into a mouse. of doing my interpretation of that scene of turning into a mess. We're so fucked up. It's so great. It's so strange, how, yeah.

We're so fucked up. We're so fucked up. We're so fucked up. We're so fucked up. We're so fucked up. We're so fucked up. We're so fucked up. We're so fucked up.

We're so fucked up. We're so fucked up. We're so fucked up. We're so fucked up. We're so fucked up. We're so fucked up. We're so fucked up. We're so fucked up. We're so fucked up. We're so fucked up. We're so fucked up. I mean, think about like Disney cartoons in the 90s. There was at least one episode of every series where somebody got turned into something, whether it was a werewolf or whatever. Or there's some monster that kidnaps a girl

and carries her away. Like that was a big thing, it looks like Disney in the 90s. Yeah, you're right. Magic and dispel would always turn into something else. Can you do, what kind of, can you do a little bit of the Foley turning into a donkey routine? Is that possible?

Oh, Lord. I just want to know what this guy is into when he's calling your phone sex line for. No, what do you mean? I mean, by Foley, you mean making noise with objects or just the transformation part. All of it, you know, mainly like he wanted to sound like you know like the character in Pinocchio who was smoking like a cigarette while he did or a cigar. He's like, I want you to make the noise that you're doing that as you go through. Oh, I see. And then make sounds like things are knocking over as your,

you know, your hands are turning into a lot of soldiers falling over. Oh my God. And I had like, you want to need to do like one part where he's like, I want it to sound like your clothes are ripping so I took some paper. He's like, oh that's perfect. That's perfect. That's perfect. Like tearing, it's great. Oh my God, my pants are ripping right off like that. Oh wow. Yeah, like oh no, my pants are ripping. What am I gonna do? And then you have to make Donkey sounds too?

Yeah. Yeah. Is it too much for me to ask for a Donkey sound? Sean, do your show. Oh, that's it. I'm sorry. I mean, maybe you asked real nice. Please, can you please do it for that?

For though, I know there's probably two or three guys listening who would just blow their loads right now. So I had to like, you know, kind of pray like a donkey. It was just this very guttural. He's a head boy. I had him make this guy. I did it, you know, and it was fun. I'm going to be honest as a sex worker,

I've been a sex worker for six years, doing content, talking on the phone. And I get a lot of the same thing over and over again. It's really refreshing to have strange things like that, because it's a break from the same guy who wants the same kind of domination call, where I call him names and things like that. And that's what I'm too.

I don't have a problem doing it, obviously, in this line of work. But it's nice to have something that's a little bit different when sometimes it can't get a little monotonous. I bet. I bet. That's funny. Okay, please, please read us some news, please. All right, all right. Here we go.

So I laughed when I first read this title, I'm probably gonna laugh again. Dad leaves gender reveal party after finding out his unborn child is a girl. I mean, what do you do? Take it back. Sorry, it's the wrong side. And you're making it change. But I'm out of here. No, we're done. Those things are, I mean, those gender reveal parties. So I was at my life coaches, Scarface, as I call them now. Oh, God.

I was at Scarface's gender reveal party. And there's like, as they were cutting into the cake to see if it was blue or pink, I was thinking, man, there's a lot of pressure to to act, not disappointed if you pop a pink, if that frosting is pink. So I know, I know you want a boy. I would assume most guys I know are looking for a boy. So did he not know? Yeah, they don't know.

No, find out right then. Like the simple thing is the parents don't know and somebody else with family knows. Like they took on the whole of Jesus. Yeah. All right. There's a lot, it's too much pressure. I got, I hope I never end up the whole of Jesus. Yeah. All right. There's a lot it's too much pressure. I got, I hope I never end up at one of those. It's their horror.

In any capacity, I don't even want to be like on the same street. Like if one of them's going on, I really don't. That's kind of a new thing. Like I don't remember like my family members who were having kids when I was growing up having this, this seems like it just kind of cropped up in the last decade or so.

Yeah, it's people celebrating, you know, it's like graduating fifth grade. Like, oh, now we're making everybody get around to do this fucking moment of our lives. Just have it, have it by yourselves. Have a fucking family. How about that? Like a family instead of having a village

celebrate every fucking moment of your kids' life. It's like you have your Facebook friends and then those, you make up reasons for those to get together. And you never see each other. It's weird. Okay, keep going Amy, please. So a 33 year old man and expectant father said they suddenly left his unborn baby's gender reveal party after learning the child would be a girl.

I don't know what came over me, but I felt at that moment that it was that was very bitter disappointment. I'm wondering whether, like, bitter disappointment, like, you know, like, you know, like, you're all feeling his Christmas bonus or some shit, like, you know, go ahead. Like, you don't really get a choice in that. You just kind of, it's lottery. You know what you can do. Another stripper was born.

Yeah, we're all, yeah. There you go. Okay, what's the next one? The next, next, er, article. Okay, Biden won't be traveling to Milwaukee for the Democratic National Convention. What a surprise. The already small attendance for the DNC

got even smaller when the Democratic National Convention Committee announced that Joe Biden would not be attending to accept the democratic nomination. Instead, by and will deliver his acceptance speech from Delaware. So like, oh God, that fucking guy. I mean, why do you even have to, why do they even have this like you have to officially accept it's like, yeah, he's, he's the not, he's the nominee. Why do you have that's what I mean? Why even have him? do they even have this like you have to officially accept it's like yeah he's he's the not he's the nominee why you have that's what we

have in haven't just have the election and then when if the democrats win just pick whatever you want Twitter vote Twitter vote now Twitter vote that's what I'm on to now what to Twitter vote sign up on Twitter just to see results will be the last choice yeah uh... okay what's it's I don't get ranked choice. I am not playing. I just don't even I don't even understand why Biden exists.

I just put just put a cartoon up there that people can vote for just put not put a big X through Trump. You know, run Negatrump. Hi, I'm not I'm not Trump. I'm just a generic compete. I'm just white fucking noise. That means no to Trump vote no on Trump. Hi, I'm not, I'm not Trump. I'm just a generic, I'm just white fucking noise. That means no to Trump. Vote no on Trump. This election, I mean, I think that is what this election call it literally that. Yeah. Don't put some old fuck. I like that he's getting tortured and tormented and that he seems afraid every time he's on television. I like that part, but just get cut. Don Don't you wanna see more of that? Yeah, I guess I do.

I guess you kinda do. See, I can see you're conflicted. I wanna see his concession speech when he just has no idea, when he finally slips into sonility and he has no fucking idea what he's even talking about on the podium when he concedes to Trump.

That's what I, like, Oh, you know, we fought a great fight. Like, you have no idea. Just reading words on the thing. Are we in Milwaukee? I'm in Milwaukee. Okay. You know, everything this year is such a big mess.

I mean, you know, it's like in previous years, you know, when he had election years, you know, the like entire year leading up to that election was just this madhouse of everybody talking about the different candidates. And this year we got a lot of other things on our minds that are kind of taking precedents, which is sad.

That's how I'm working on the things. We got a lot of room in the madhouse. Let me hold on, let me talk. Hey, give me a couple of minutes. I'll call you back, okay? All right, give me a couple of minutes. This guy's calling in, I gotta a couple of minutes. I'll call you back. Okay. All right, give me a couple of minutes. This guy's calling in. I got to talk to.

Okay. Amy, what's the next one? We spent so much time talking about donkey transformation. We spent so much time talking about donkey transformation. What's the next news you got? National Parks to receive billions in funding thanks to landmark bill. Good. It's one of the most monumental and far-reaching conservation bills in half a century was

signed into law by President Donald Trump on Tuesday. The Great American Outdoors Act will provide billions of dollars in funds to national parks and public lands, most notably dedicating 9.5 billion over the next five years to address the backlog of maintenance projects in the national parks. Land. Land is getting money. Land. Fucking dirt. Yeah. Dirt. Yeah. Everybody, fuck your small business. We got a bunch of money for dirt, though. I hope these parks are really beautiful because no one has a fucking home anymore. We're going to be living in them. God, dammit! Everybody get a tent! We're building you a really nice national park that you can pay $20 a night to deal with these prick-fuck-prick-rangers!

God damn, if you make any noise past 10 we're calling the police. I knew it would come back to shoot you in the head. I knew it would come back to somebody keeping you from doing whatever you want to do. I just- I just- We're just gonna be giving money to these and they're gonna tell me to not do shit. Those park rangers is such assholes man their reservation system is fucked and they police it like they got nothing better to do because they don't the outdoors can take care of themselves. We don't need up nine billion dollars to make sure a fucking a marker of a marker of your campsite is in there. What are they doing with it? What do they possibly need to fucking care about?

I don't need a fetal or anything. They don't need people to go out and stop you from molesting the animals. That kind of takes care of itself when the animals kill you. You know, it's so fucking, all right. Thank you for the news, Amy. What is your site? What is your site? What is your site?

Let's see. You can find me on Clips your sale.com. What's the site that they have to go to? They have to just search for Amy. Amy, Mercury. They can just do a search for Amy Mercury. It's not what. As far as the actual store name, the site's long, but you know, I particular store is called Amy's kinky castle on there It's finding on Twitter at e or carry or at or girl comic and you can read my or comic You know at my site, www.or girl.com And yeah, that's where you can find me. What's the weirdest what's like the weirdest fetish request you've got in your opinion

Well, that depends on your definition of weird All women aren't like this why are all women such a pain in the ass Sean that's what I want I'm going to get a turkey shore. I'm going to get a turkey shore. I'm going to get a turkey shore. I'm going to get a turkey shore. I'm going to get a turkey shore. I'm going to get a turkey shore. I'm going to get a turkey shore. I'm going to get a turkey shore. I'm going to get a turkey shore. I'm going to get a turkey shore.

I'm going to get a turkey shore. I'm going to get a turkey shore. I'm going to get a turkey shore. I'm going to get a turkey shore. I'm going to get a turkey shore. I'm going to get a turkey shore. I'm going to get a turkey shore. I'm going to get a turkey shore.

I'm going to get a turkey shore. I'm going to get a turkey shore. I'm going to get a turkey shore. I'm going to get a turkey shore. I'm going to get a turkey shore. I'm going to get a turkey shore. I'm going to get a turkey shore. I'm going to get a turkey shore. I'm going to get a turkey shore. I'm going to get a turkey shore. I'm going to get a turkey shore. Jess, that's silly. Yeah. And I think the way that that is kind of, they think it's such a feminist woke statement, but for me, like, when I was in my 20s,

like, I would have felt kind of, it would have felt kind of compromising for me to sound to say that, because you're like, what, you think I am not adult enough to make I have choices? Right, yeah. You know, I don't like that statement, because it implies that I don't have an bodily autonomy

to be able to say yes or no to somebody. Just that the attraction is. That's bullshit. It's also the same guys. The guys who are not carting every stripper they've ever gotten a lap dance from are the same ones or they're not, I'm shit, they're going to 30 plus porn hub, they search by 30 plus only. Oh, I don't look at pornography for anyone under 30.

I'm much too old for that. Yeah, that would make me a pedophile. I'm not gonna support this. You know what, in porn, it's so funny, like, blind between like, yeah, kind of two categories. You got teen or you got milk. And it's really has nothing to do with age. And step sisters in the middle.

30 year old teens and I've met 24-year-old milths, okay? So it has a lot more to do with your body type and everything. So a guy just like, once I'm gonna look at milth porn, he's probably gonna get a handful of 20-some things. And he's in his 40s, why is that wrong? She's over 18, she's an adult, she consented to do porn. And I don't feel like that's inappropriate because I'm an adult and I'm 35,

but even so, in my 20s, if someone had told me that, I'd be like, excuse me, I don't have a right to say yes to her now just because he's five years older than me. It's like fucking Islam. Like it's all the way back to just straight up Islam. Women could never make decisions. You can't make any decision with a man. I have to make it for you because you just mentally not,

it's fucking all the way around. All right, Amy. Thank you, thank you for calling in. I love you. Well, thank you so much for having me guys. This has been great. It's been really cool to meet you and talk with you. I love your whole deal. You're too much. I got Amy's kinky castle. All right, thank you. Thank you. Thank you so much for having me guys. This has been great. It's been really cool to meet you and talk with you. I love your whole deal.

You're too much. I got Amy's kinky castle. All right, thank you. Thank you. Thank you guys. Bye bye. I got to talk to this. I like her.

I like her. She's really nice. She's very, I mean, she seems very, very normal. All right, is Karlin here? Karlin is the quintillionaire? Karlin. Are you here? Were you just trying to call me on Discord, you motherfucker? All right, let Carl in here? Carl the quintillionaire? Carl, are you here? Were you just trying to call me on Discord, you motherfucker?

All right, let me call you. No, you're talking to me right now, don't call me. Oh shit, okay. Okay, Carl, Carl, you showed up at my house last week after the show. Why did you do that? Your face. Your face is a small adult, you're a tall fuck. No, why did you show that? You're face. Why is this a small at all? You're a tall fuck.

No, why did you show up to my house? Why did you do that? Last week. I wanted to start making money, man. I'm working in Taco Bell. Why did you have a whole bunch of 16-year-old girls just looking at my guns, dude? I don't like it. Why did you show up at my house? That's what I want to know. Oh, I wanted to make jokes.

You were sweating. I don't know what you were doing. I was sweating because I don't know you. And I'm worried about lunatics showing up at my house unannounced. Don't fuck, don't show up at my house. At this goes for everybody. Do not show up at my fucking house. You understand that?

You want to drive over now? No, I don't want you to show up. Listen to me. I am worried about getting murdered by an obsessed fan. I'll be straight with you. I am very concerned about getting murdered by an obsessed fan. So don't show up in my fucking house. Okay, I'll take it.

Okay, okay. Promise me. Promise me you won't show up in my house. I hear your car keys Promise me that those down. No, everybody does not get one. No, there's no door. No No, everybody does not get one. Why did you think? Why did you think you could? Why did you think showing up in my house would be like acceptable long does it take For a whole year to knock on doors. How many doors you think?

Kyle, why did you think? I'm going to suburbs, or if I go to the middle states, whereas like one house per like five miles. He wants to make jokes. Kyle, why did you think I just want to make jokes? Why did you think it would be okay to show up at my house? You said, you could find your address on the Google, or, right, that's what I did.

Yeah, but why did you turn that into, I'm gonna show up with this guy's house. I can use a good idea. Do you go to people's houses who you are not friends with? Like without an invitation? You're my first, you fought my chair. Okay, don't do it again. That's, you will, someone will shoot you if you do that.

You understand that, right? Yeah. These are dark times. No one knows who anyone is. Has a strange person ever showed up at your house? Who you don't know? I was in five feet from you. You're right.

Yeah, all the fucking time. What do you mean, yeah, all the fucking time? What do you mean, what do I mean? Who's your home? Who comes to your house? Vibrates in my pocket all the time. No, who comes to your house unannounced not your phone in your pocket all right turn on the notifications i decide who who gets to come in my house

uh... but does it ever happen where someone you don't know shows up at your house uh... yeah when i download the app and forgot to turn off the notifications they just decide to fuck me over like shaff oh, chef, I forgot about your app. What the hell are you talking about? What are you talking about? Hi, Sean. Hey, what's he fuck? What are you? Notifications. How does that happen? What does that have to do with people showing up at your house? Carl, please explain to me a great plan or no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, I can show up at the front door. I heard. I thought, what are you doing? I thought you two videoed by Riley. Mike, and I called him, he was helping me out. If you wanna yell at someone, yell at him, he's your,

no, you, you, you guys. Showed up at my house. Why did you show up at my house? You. Let's reboot the biggest problem, no? You gave me a question. Are you not answering my question? I answered it.

Why did you show up in my questions? I'm not, I don't answer questions on this show. Other people do. Why did you show up at my house? Do you want me to show up at your house? This sounds like that's what you want me to do. No, you want to shoot me? I'll let you shoot me.

I believe that you would. That's what terrifies me about you. Why would you do that? I had the coronavirus around February, March, the vaccine's in me. Okay, good. So you wanted to give me the vaccine. Man, you, listen, do not,

don't ever do that again. Don't ever do that again, it's very frightening. All right, just let me know when you don't want me to do it again. Always, I never want you to show up. What? You contradicted fuck. Contradictive fuck see how the rage comes out.

You think I think you've been pretty consistent on this. Yeah, you know what? You want to ask me a question? You don't want to take all the show up. Maybe we could start there. That's kind of dick. I said my question was what made you think you should show up at my house uninvited?

Oh, I think I know what you want me to answer. I want to make money, dude. My baby's coming. Why? Jesus. Did you think you knocked up a woman? What? Yeah, my wife.

Oh, Jesus. How long have you been married? 2018 December. long have you been married? uh... shit... 2018... December... hey...Ace... December Ace uh... did your wife know that you were coming to my house? uh... yeah... yeah she didn't want to come... she... she doesn't like sitting in cars did she tell you that was a good idea?

I told her we're gonna retire after I go over there I can start working with you but what did she say? Did she want me to work? No, I don't want you to work, you freaking me out. I won't freak you out anymore. I want Sean to talk now. No, even this conversation is freaking me out. Oh shit, okay.

What did you say here? It's fun. What did you were enjoying this conversation? What did your wife say when you told her your plan to just show up at my house? I told her I wanted to start making jokes and she says do whatever you want because I'm the baby. I'm the first baby. What does that mean? What do you mean? What do I mean? I mean, what the fuck did the thing that you guys said mean? Explain my woman, right? I went to her and her family at a park, random, her and her brothers were

there. Her dad was from parks. I went to go watch her dad, please talk her. And that's how I asked her out. And from then on in, I played Jenga. I played Jenga all the time. Until I got married and I let her win. And you are able to have a wife with the way you're speaking right now. You should see how she speaks. I could only imagine. Like Helen Keller. Do you have, are you taking any medication?

Just as an aside underrated joke. Water and soda. Drinking water. My wife feeds me. Have you been diagnosed with any mental problems? No. No. I self-diagnosed myself, but everyone who's professional around me says I'm fine to shut

the fuck up. Oh boy. Okay. Yeah. What kind of professional is the diagnosed? Someone can count how many fucks I say I'm curious. I'm gonna know. I'm gonna know how many times I say that.

So what is your idea of what making all the money would be? Like what's your plan? Right. Oh, I already told you. No, you didn't tell Sean. Okay. I want every agent, I like to know. I like to know.

I like to know. I like to know. I like to know. Every movie takes 10%. 90% goes into the company, right? Uh-huh. I'll keep my 10, share it with my family myself. That's my little circle.

But what are you going gonna do to make money? 90% of the money goes to the dickles, right? No. Oh, well shit, that's my idea to... What is your idea, the idea to spread out? You have to explain what your plan is. Like what's your money making idea? Um, okay, all right.

Thank you for asking the right questions. I would have all right, so I was working in a warehouse Babies coming. Yeah, someone knocked in my anogin and said and you know that static TV black and white dots all over Yeah, I felt that from from head to toe. I'm like what the fuck is this? Yeah, and someone started talking to me Your AI dick. Yeah. Yeah. Okay.

I've had a dick in your ear. Your dick in my ear finally nutted and is like, Hey. Yeah. And I kept looking. Bro, you sound schizophrenic. Like I'm going to be honest with you. You sound fucking schizophrenic.

Yeah. That's why I'm extra concerned that you just showed up unannounced. Nice. Yeah, that's how it usually happens. What usually happens? Well, the guy who created the main coding, which should be open coding all the time. Yeah. Yeah, he let you finally nut in my ear. Okay. That was nice of him. That was nice of him. And I was like, oh shit, out of all people, I get the full fledged, you know,

Noggin Twinkie under my hair. Okay. Hey, Carl, right? Yeah, hi, Sean. Hey, how you spell your name, by the way? How old are you? 25. Oh, 25, 25. I'm just curious. Does anyone in your family have a history you spell your name by the way? How old are you? 25 oh 25 25 Did you ever does anyone in your family of a history of mental illness by the way? It's premium uncle killed himself never knew him

Yeah, one is a note Do you have any violent fantasies? When don't I have violent fantas fantasies which is all the time k are you having any right now uh... uh... no no just answering your questions have you ever been arrested for anything

no no i've been waiting have been driving around with drugs in me and in the car for as long as i remember what kind of drugs do you like uh... uh... tylenon uh... my wife can take to know when she's pregnant so tylenon is good as long as I remember. What kind of drugs do you like? Tylenol. My wife can take Tylenol when she's pregnant, so Tylenol is good. When you say Tylenol, do you mean the baby?

What does it do for you? Like you go to Target and you buy Tylenol. You know that, you know what I mean? Yeah. But if you're talking about like narcotics, never. I only drink alcohol and it's been over a year since I smoked weed by vape to weed constantly, more concentrated THC and CBD help in my back pain constantly we're in all that good stuff.

Anyways, yeah, I know my voice speaks up whenever you want me to speak anything irrelevant, bitch. So what's your what's your content? I'm gonna your name. What's your what's your plan for your what content do you want to make then can you describe it for everyone so they would know what and everything? I know how to sing I know to act. I hope I can act. Can you sing something for us right now? Can you sing something for us right now? Yeah, do you have any original songs that you can sing? Well, I want to go on. Let me think to you in person, let's genre. No, no, if you ever show up in my house again, I'll call the police. I promise you.

I'm not joking. I want you to understand that I'm 100% not joking. If you show up in my house, I'm calling the police. Okay, I won't go. Okay. All right. What do you like to sing? Let me just shuffle them.

I'm going to go on my Spotify. Okay. Yeah, sing something for us. Yeah. I mean, go on my life song. There we go. Okay. Um, Ed Sheeran popped up. Castle on the hill. Brett, let's hear it. Me, Dan. Um, you wish. Pay me first. Oh, to sing, we got another Christy Kiwi here. Right. So you don't have sing for us. Oh shit. Um, no, okay. Let me play. Oh, to sing, we got another Christy Kiwi here. Right. So you don't have to sing for us. Oh, shit. Um, okay, let me play it. Um, I'm already clocked in, right? Let's see.

I'm a little nervous, so I'm gonna sound a little shaky first off. Take it a super few more than that. Well, let me come down. Let me come down. Take me back to when I, nope, nope, Let me comment down. Let me comment down. Take me back to it.

Hi. Nope. Nope, can't do it. I need to slow down. You can't do it. You can't sing. What about any jokes? Can you sing a good joke?

I feel like this is the scene in the Joker where Robert denierled his mug. You can need a joke, I'll answer it. How about that? I'll give you a setup and you'll do the punchline. Oh, that's true. That's walking on a, walking on a high wire. Okay, a guy shows up at another guy's house. On an ounce, on the punchline.

A guy shows up at another guy's house, unannounced. What's, give us the punchline. Oh, you want to buy a sundown? Yeah. The telemarketer in person. Let me try to sell you something I guess, right? Go door to door, knock on someone's door and say, hey, you want this product? Do you hear voices in your head?

No, not right now, just you. And Sean, if you'd like to. Usually, you know, hear him spell his name. Usually do you? It's SCZAH-ONX-U with an Umlot UN. Umlot? Yeah. Okay, I'm gonna see if I can split right later. Right. Do you hear voices at any other time? Who? Do you hear voices at any other time? Oh, yeah, hold on, hold on. Do you want to know about voices? Anybody want to come in? Hold on, let's go on a response.

Well, not hold on. Come on, keep people entertained. I'm not. You see my name on the blank show? You see Ad Libbing here? Captain Sano says that he's schizophrenic and that you clearly are also. Let me get the reminder in here. Okay, cool.

So you wanna talk about Captain Insanel, let's go WWE or Ross, SmackDown or something. All right, Carl, what's the other, what's your name? What makes you a rage? I think I gotta end this call now. You're not even gonna make me a rage. Okay, well where can people check you out?

patreon.com-forge-slash. Call me a monkey's uncle. All right, $20 a month gets me from you know my start is my start. Well, what everybody's experiencing now. That's my start. Okay. Well, let's see you paid. Let's see if people let's see if people check out. There you go.

If you guys want to message me if anybody wants to message me for showcasing or casting anything like that, I don't want to work at Taco Bell anymore. They're paying me $13 to get these. I don't want to work a taco bun anymore. They're paying me $13 to get these, I don't want to finish that sentence. Okay. They're paying $13. Yeah, they're paying you $13.

They're paying you $13. Carlos Ganzza. All right, all right, see you, Carl. Oh my God, don't show up at my fucking house again. Well, that only worse than I expected. Did something's going on there? All right, everybody, this is the Dix show. I've got some songs for you.

Oh, you didn't even get into any advice. God damn it. How long have we been going? Right on two. Two hours. Right on two. Whatever, I don't care if we want to do some advice. How will do voicemails?

Yeah, voicemails. This is the Dix show Patreon.com slash the Dix show. This is Kendall and Hyde, big on Twitch. I'm worried about that guy. I would be a little concerned. Eh. See you next Tuesday. Wake up, jerk off, Haley's so hot.

Perhaps today, she'll touch my cock. She's slimed, I call, but she can't talk. That's fine, regroup, tonight, I'll stalk. I'm a star, that's why they are all on my hat. Filtered up like a mandatory mask. So efficient, just watch me multitask. Driving wagons, while I delete your chats. Need new groupies to view me stupidly acting fruity.

All your haters are soon to be doomed like all my soup All these defants don't know how to count them on trouble with math I need a tutor We need degrees when you are being damned man I'm good with computers Yeah I'm gettin big, I'm gettin big on Twitch Yeah

I'm a genius and I'm cool with shit Yeah Like I told you I'm a little bit of a genius I'm gettin big, I'm getting big, I'm twitchy. Here at Madcast Media, we exposed pedophilia. 15 grand for a closet, huh? Got to go save money here.

Howdy partners, I'm Ox, man. Offly, awesome, and bad ass. My poor nephew, that sad sack. Howdy partners, I'm Oxman. Awfully awesome and badass. My poor nephew, that sad sack. Has no sleep for his napsack. If you okay, is it a way for us to help you buy us a food? What, you're in love? Why don't you just let me a book and name us a loo? I'm not a cook, I'm just a man.

Look at her ladies looking to smooch. Falling in love, I'm on my hand, that's where they land. I'm making smooth. Yeah. I'm getting big. I'm getting big on twitch. Yeah, I'm a cowboy and a coolish. Yeah, I have some failure with a handsome chin Yeah, I'm getting big. I'm getting big on twitch Emails need mail. Soccer needs stock details compiled on my laptop laptop Next loss and files strong like Sean's jaw Till then guess I'll become a god A twitch god Hi everybody, I'm banana dogs

I think I'm funny and I think you're not Being a fruit who annoyingly talks My whole life that orange ripped me off Who's the prettiest banana I'm flies like when you're having gettin' big on Twitch Yeah! Disprin' in is a peeling bitch Yeah! I call this banana horror stick, yeah! I'm gettin' big, I'm gettin' big on Twitch

Hey there fellas, call me Maddie Lost Maddie sucks that I'm glad he lost Spank me hard, make me spill my costs Daddy dickets with daddy wants My wig is pink and emo I stole a shit from veto My bathwater is primo The cum of 50 people

A lady's got an e-o to supplement Chesmeoles of killing books like Rico the shit in liquid like sea gold My manbots of damn slut needs cream pride Like grampos and jammed up by black thugs Who get their cramp hands stock Wanna help my channel guys, I have one wish Call me dirty slut and watch me get big on Twitch

Oh, it's great. Very good. Hypnotic. Um, here is, here's some of Maddix on Twitch. He was, he was doing Maddix news to cover the explosion in Beirut. Oh yeah. So this was, this is what he had to say to his chat while he was covering it. Okay. Yeah, if you guys could tone down the racism

and anti-Semitism, that'd be great. That would be great. That's great. That's great. Yeah. He's not doing the Sam Hyde joke either. The Sam Hyde joke is making fun of what he's doing right now. Yeah, yeah.

Can you believe Maddox has such an anti-Semitic and racist chat and fan base? That is just so if I ever have never warned our listeners to be less racist. Never had to. So the only conclusion to draw is that ours are not racist and Maddox's are extremely racist and anti-Semitic. That he has to resort to warning them. Wow. And that is exactly how it's done.

Yeah. What you just did right there, it's exactly how it's done. If you guys can go to the Scaring Down the Racism and Anti-Semitism, that'd be great in the Charum. Look at that! Aftermolias! If you guys can tone down the racism and anti-Semitism, that'd be great in the Charum.

Oh, that'd be great. Horrible. Or, you horrible, but I don't want y'all to leave. Yeah, I mean cuz lumber Yeah, yeah lumber fucker All right, let's see here God I'm gonna get some quick advice for the regular collars and email writers questioning whether or not they're gay. Before you start writing an email, just know you are gay. Most people are not fighting being gay.

If they're not gay, you don't have to fight them in both. I just know you are gay. Most people are not fighting being gay. If they're not gay, you don't have to fight an impulse. So if you think that you're gay, you're probably gay. Yeah, I think he's right. You're gay. Yeah, you just start to email with I'm gay. If that's it. Yeah, fine.

If you are really questioning it, it's even if you're questioning a little bit, who cares, just fucking go with it. Yeah, it's almost like they need, they want somebody in some cases to tell them. It's like, well yeah, you obviously, you sound gay. You sound like you like, you know, like you like dudes. It's like, yeah, you know, I kind of thought maybe I,

you know, I did. It's like you know, I did it's like so now Are you more like accepting of it because you wrote in and you know, we told you you hope so gay. I mean I The whole yeah, all right here. I mean he's right Pretty good Sean. You know, I'm making a fucking rage. I work at a restaurant right and i just delivered the guffold should all day wearing a mask i got you always fucking plexiglass crap or washing her hands you got fucking hand sanitizer when i get up work i can't fucking go anywhere because nothing is open right at that nine and all bars are closed fucking nothing i can't i go i get a fucking delivery today and i get to the door and this lady and like her kid and like her mom or whatever they're there and they're like fucking.

Oh, you can just sit on the ground and like they're being all weird but like neither more in math and then like later I get back to work and they're fucking Karen into my fucking oh god your point was where the math fucking so he's sitting there fucking yelling at me talking about the state coronavirus numbers and like acting like I don't fucking care and like fucking bubble up I understand because he's purchasing the link shit is this open I'm willing to fucking you know I'm not gonna die in my fucking hells

even though I really fucking can't then I want to I just want to quit right now because it's such fucking Well, and by the way I Girlfriends and nurse and she's been working in COVID units for the last fucking six seven months We both got it. I got anybody test. I have both short term and long term antibodies I I crushed the fucking numbers every week. They're so fucking loaded. I can't get all fucking garbage. Gotta wear the mask anyway. I had it. I have anybody's.

Can't carry it. No, office with their fucking fake numbers. Fuck you. Yeah, thank you. Good call. Sorry, buddy. Sorry about everyone. Please don't kill yourself.

The carons are the real epidemic. Yeah. That's the truth. I didn't bring it up in that copship. the carons are the real epidemic. Yeah. That's the truth. I didn't bring it up in that cops shooting article. I think the girl, the woman who called in on the guy said like she had to get up early for a flight for work or something like that.

1030 on a Friday. She had to really put that in there. Oh, bomb extra right about this, because I have work. If you're ever allowed, like 10 third, that's not that late. I could see it's a weekend. I'll give people a long leash on the weekend,

even it's like, yeah, I gotta get up and do something tomorrow, but it's like, put your plugs in. They're not doing this on a fucking Tuesday night at, you know, 1.15 a.m. and they're still going in the backyard and, you know, clankin' bottles and fuckin' hooping and holler and you know, 1.15 a.m. and they're still going in the backyard and, you know, clankin' bottles and fuckin' hoopin' and hollerin'. And that's, yeah. Somebody shows up.

I'm, obviously, I'm answering the door of the fuckin' gun. What's going on in my house? Yeah. Cop, within five seconds, murders you. Fuckin' murder. It's fuckin' chair. It's fuckin' wild. Hangin'.

Yeah. The people who picked up my recycling just left me a nice fantastic little message it says oops something you put in your recycle then doesn't fit our standards haha they do it's going in the trash now yeah

every single thing i put in the garbage you're right that's that was on me my bad so going in the garbage now what thank you for correcting my behavior. I was trying to recycle things. What have they shown me that I was an idiot?

What did they do with the item? Did they take it anyway? Did they send it on as car? They just took his whole, they used a big machine that they poured all of his recyclables on his car. Jesus. They finally picked up my, the garbage store finally picked up my trash by the way. Oh, they did. They had another up my, the garbage store finally picked up my trash by the way.

Oh, they did. They had another fight with that woman. And they did they, you didn't have to move it anywhere or you did. I just, you know, you know, you saw I had it set up like it was a trail to trick them into getting it all. Right. And they finally did it. Oh. Uh, that's my car. Trash men. You did what I wanted to do. They went by, they went by just to take a picture. No, what? Oh, I can't get that trash. That's so hard. Trash men, you did what I wanted to do. They went by, you lost. They went by just to take a picture. No, what a, oh, I can't get that trash. That's, look, Joey, look at this. Fucking, get the fucking picture, camera picture.

I get a trash picture out. Here, get me with it. Here, look at me. Get me pointing at it. Look at this, but it is. Let me show you how far this fucking thing is alive from the street. Right, I'm gonna, yeah.

Yeah, we can't touch it. We can touch it. That's funny. Go on the other side so you can show how far it is from in on your own property fucking bitch Okay, so let me start with I'm a little bit high and I've been eating carrots so my throat is kind of fucked up Okay, well, I have a humble request for you dick Please let Sean do his own little segment and I know what's perfect for him. Please don't shut this down

Sean's animal corner or you could call it uh... shan's animal hour we finally talk about it passion talking about and particular animal once every couple of episodes i do like animals cool they are shan loves animal i do love animals let him have this but pay it for parents was not Wasn't that your show? Yeah.

Talked about on Carl. I was reading a great white shark on Wikipedia. Did you know blah blah blah. And the facts. Sean. He's totally right. Don't say you wouldn't love that. Okay. I'm out of here. Dig one garbage store zero. I fucking won. Trashman lose. You fucking suck. Trashman. Fuck you. He's right. I do love animals. Do you want to do an animal corner? I'm a private store zero, I fucking won. Trashman lose, you fucking suck, trashman, fuck you.

He's right, I do love animals. Do you wanna do an animal corner? Sure. I don't know, you have to see, you have to kind of pull the audience. What have you like narrated in animal series? I don't think I could do it without being, without doing like an impersonation of, you know,

like it would be like making fun probably. Oh, what kind of animals would you want to talk about? Like dinosaurs or... Not so much. I do like dinosaurs are cool, but no, a lot of present day, present day animals. Present day animals? Yeah, probably.

American ones or all around the world. Pet animals or exotic animals. No, I have equal opportunity, I think, for that. Are you into tigers at all? Did you watch that series? Tiger King. Yeah. I did watch that series because it's...

Did you watch it for the animal content? It's like a train wreck. Yeah, turning into a dumpster fire. No, no, that was the animals there were the two-legged kinds. That's what I was... It's a dry humor from the Sean Animal Corner show. What kind of animal... I don't know, would be a breakout episode?

Sharks, people do sharks all the time though. They do, but it's probably what I know that I know most about. Yeah, they always fascinated me. Did you see that sperm whales are the loudest thing on Earth? They're like 230 decibels. They can hear each other all the way around the world. They're sick.

I didn't know about the all the way around the world, but yeah, I do think they have their clicks and stuff, they're the loudest stuff. So you knew about that already, folks. I did, yeah. There should be a stump, the Sean animal Sean show where people tell you things and then you say if you already knew it or not.

Yeah. Yeah, exactly. What a great game show that would be. I could go, you know that? Yeah, I knew that. Well, I could would be. Like, could you know that? Yeah, I do that. Well, I could also be, but see, but they could lie. And then I just, I, you're the only one that, oh, I have to be up a fact.

Yeah, I mean, you know, I have to be, I have to, you know, and I think I would be, I think I would be really honest, but I would, I would suck if I should have known a fact and didn't know it, I think. I would watch that show. Yeah. Did you know it? Well, you're sick.

Yeah. I knew it. Yeah. How about that? Didn't stump him again this week. Well, maybe the next week, I'll have something to stump this guy. I don't know. That's like a very hard turn from how this show really is.

I don't know how we could, you know, see that guy murders me. Yeah. You're gonna have to do something. Oh, boy. That's my biggest nightmare. Is that dick will be murdered and then I'll have to do something. Oh boy. That's my biggest nightmare. Is that dick will be murdered and then I'll have to come on and explain it. I have several videos that I made just in case that happens.

Good. As soon as that guy Carl came over, I made an additional one. So I've been murdered by Carl. Right. Yeah, the guy probably shouldn't be joking. I probably shouldn't let them call in. But I mean, I don't know, man. It's fucking weird.

It does. I mean, that's, I don't know much about schizophrenia other than it is not multiple personality. People just go like, oh, I must get to Frinnick. Oh, me too. Like, it's not dead. No, it's like, short circuit in constant. Well, and it can be the voices, but it can also be, you know, I'm seeing you for what you really are.

And I'm reading into like, you're really a demon. Exactly. Exactly. Exactly. But what I, from what I understand, I think most skits of phrenics are not violent or don't have the violent tendencies. I don't know how, I don't know if that's true. I don't know what percentage of them act in a dangerous manner, you know.

Well, let's see, let's poke the bear. See what happens, you know. All right, so what about dishwasher, birthdays at work? Oh, and you know, this guy's in the season. It's a nice shift, so he's gonna be stuck there until like 11 o'clock, so I can gonna be stuck there until I get 11 Xbox. The dishwasher guy.

Mm-hmm. But it's a hit. The GE is turning 8. We're gonna sing for him. We're gonna get the whole restaurant together, and it'll be great. It's on crack and whips. You're getting everybody all 30 or 35, however many people are there. In the dining room, waiting for him to come out and I go out and I get a cake and

hey, there are cakes and there are cakes and I'm telling you that's just cake. So I'm like, you know everyone's waiting and I'm about to go grab them and I said my buddy I say hey, wouldn't it be funny if he turned out to be diabetic? But I want to ask, I I think I'll take that one. Oh, man. Oh, man. Anyway, you know, I go get him, asking the hell you know, we surprise. That's a surprise.

He's real happy. We sing, you know, well, he's got the candles. It's all a great time. And then he leaves. And I say, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, what is that? I do, buddy. What are you doing? You're going to have to see your cake, buddy. It's doing you're gonna have some cake buddy to birthday eat the fuck care

It's no good for me with the medical in front of the entire What's the point boys and I have a gun my face There's like the fourth worst of ourselves fourth worst That's not oh yeah the kids. Oh yeah, So fourth worst. That's not. Oh, yeah, that gets over. Yeah, that good.

Oh, if you enjoyed the song. Well, it's embarrassing. It's embarrassing because like you don't really know him. You know what I mean? Like, oh, it says, oh, the dishwasher. Oh, yeah, somebody's like his birthday, but you don't know anything about him. But really, but it's still a nice gesture. Like it's not.

It's not that. Yeah. Sure. It it's not, it's not that, yeah, sure. It's not that, it's not that bad. That's not bad. Anything that would reinforce his station in life is to not even know about his diabetes and then shove a party in his face of everybody eating his birthday cake. You were a little bit the victim too.

Hey, you know what, I got an idea. Instead of all that shit, just slip a guy a 20. the victim too. Hey, you know what? I got an idea instead of all that shit. Just slip a guy a 20. Give him put in your happy birthday. Here's a nice 20 and shape for it. That's crass. Happy birthday. Here you go.

Buy yourself a cake. Buyers, right. You're stuck up on fucking equal at home or something. That yeah, it's crass for everybody except the guy getting the twenty like a good i can't have to be interested in the books and i get awesome now i know i never mind buddy uh...

uh... speaking of cash hey gik you know what makes me a rage today i just went into all these and i tried to pay for my groceries with cash and they had the fucking nerve to tell me that I could not pay with cash Unless I paid with exact change Due to the coin shortage Shortage for you. I'm gonna stuff all the quarters of the bank right on my fucking at I'm gonna go home and just make a big ol scruge make a

pond yeah but just out of quarters quite you fuck your laundry what the fuck is a queen shortage just do anything that do anything you tell them to do it here we have a coin shortage so make sure you only make people pay with exact change okay

with the the the queen counters were you hold the individual denominations based on the but you did you you gave me this fiat currency

and i haven't had coins in years but i can't calculate like it's always different and it's not only going to apply to every you feel me to do like a complicate or like not exactly as perrated about it.

Business math. How the fuck are you gonna pay with correct change? You can get a fucking read. I never have exact change. Never. So it even, even when we use change, it was so rare people would mention it. How about that? I don't want to do it, but it's my only option unless I'm that one fucking

customer who writes a check that one granny. Oh, start doing that. You're a good one. I'm gonna start writing checks. Yeah, out of spite. Yeah. Big novelty ones. That'd be funny. Exact change. Hold on, I'll go to my car and get it checked.

I can write. I know those numbers. I can write the exact amount. And you see this, lick your pen. I can get your own exact change. Yeah. They'll just do anything. Hey, make sure you hassle everyone about correct change today

because we have a, I don't know, like a coin shortage. They were all haunted, so we threw them in the ocean. We're gonna get, we sent them all in for exorcism. We sent them to the Pope so he could exercise all of our coins. And we're gonna get them back in like six to eight weeks. Yeah, cycling through, he's backed up. The Pope is fucking massaging all the demons out of our coins. And we're gonna get him back in like six, but six to eight weeks. Yeah, cycling through. He's backed up.

The Pope is fucking massaging all the demons out of the coins. Yeah. Like that's any more believable than a fucking coin shortage. Where did they go? Well, they're in people's houses. So they can't make more coins.

Like, are you fucking serious? Of course they can make them. I just don't believe any, I don't believe it. Mm-hmm. Let's tell them that there's a coin shortage. That will really fuck with people. Okay, that's funny. Why not?

I saw the Fed say that we need another lockdown in order to re-stimulate the economy. The Fed said we need, actually what we need to do is lockdown again, so that things get so bad, it will stimulate the economy. And I thought, well, I mean, the paper is writing this like it's not a total joke. So people must just believe what they say. They called printing free money quantitative easing

and people gobble that shit up. Sure, we need to lock down in order to stimulate the economy. Okay. Go. Sure. We need to lock down in order to stimulate the economy. Okay. Go for it. You have fun. Hey, the Dixiel. Now, I've said a few things about guns, right? Same.

Same for jaw, Alex. Yeah. Calls you Jabberto. Calls you Jabberto. I believe it makes funny. You can say Cliff, I'm one of those guys. But you know what? I think you might agree with me on this one or not, whatever, but what makes me a rage is

people that have a great umbert was having some, like maybe even treated like a toy, having some thought of that, like like, well I can't be safe, whatever. Well, I, you know what, it was funny what you're saying, but I don't think you've ever actually be cool with people just pointing guns at each other, whatever. I don't want to be the fun police what i'm saying is simply that this is what i want to make statement it's really who really past judgment on people who have fun

right that was wrong with the range to it was was all about bro you need you need quadrails and you have quadrails on the gun that is using it for fun and not for what is intended for which is a life saving tool oh shut the fuck up life saving tool you're the tool or it's enjoyable but the fuck is wrong with that called the sport you shit and never shut trap or skeet i'm seriously shooting at these targets.

I'm very seriously training my killing skills at these fucking targets that wiggle around when I shoot them. That's what I'm doing at the arcade when I'm shooting simulated guns at things. I'm doing this only to train for life saving, for only to train against tyranny. Of all types of tyranny for anyone. But if anyone wants to dial me up and say, you need to be here defending types of tyranny. Yeah. For anyone, not just for, but if anyone wants to dial me up

and say, you need to be here defending us against tyranny at any moment, that's, I'm at your defucking disposal. I will be ready. Yeah. Fucking itty. Razor sharp. Uh, it's the, people, guns can absolutely be nothing more than an enjoyable hobby for some people.

Yeah. There's nothing wrong with that. Have fun. This first rule. Let me get a kex, Spongebob, are you in there? Are you in there? I'm here.

Do you want a globe about your link? Ha ha ha. Call. I wouldn't mind actually to be fair. Yeah, go ahead. Keep it short though. I defended him last week too, saying he's not that smug.

Who? No linkers blown the fake out. 70% here comes everybody listen. Here comes cantilians. You know this whole time I thought cantilians name was based on the like economic principle that cantilian effect and then but it just found out it wasn't mine. Oh, totally. It's just my, it was just a funny name for him.

So what? Okay. What the hell? It's very specific. All right. You got to say catch one. You thought Hitler was, oh, no, it's not Hitler based on Hitler. I'm just a dictator. Even 70% in a week is absolutely nothing in crypto.

Now I get it. Now I get why everyone hates you. You got anything to makes you rich? Well, I tried. Not making as much money, like not having able to be awake all the time so you can just like make money constantly. You have to save us, and point.

Does he's so good at it? I don't know why. I love this, I love the smugness. Yeah, I don't know what every one does. It doesn't offend me at all. I fucking hate when people get a ton of money and then act like they're Jesus about, like, well, you know, I just,

very, like Warren Buffett, I fucking hate that. I don't trust them. Literally, oh, sorry, sorry, let's do your, go ahead. Go ahead. I literally, I probably didn't go into enough why I actually got into Lincoln the first place. Like, I kind of like pretended that it was for the technical reasons.

When it reality, it was just because the memes were fantastic. Like everything else came after. Yeah, I know. But I literally did that this week with another one. I'm not going to get into that because that might be a scam. What are you? I love the beams of that solid. Well, you tell us if you fuck up and lose your hour and a half.

Yeah, believe me, believe me. If I can just did, you'll hear about it. Yeah. See, I still believe him. I just don't trust guys who are act all humble and up their own ass about money. Like, oh, you know, well, I, it's just, you know, it's just a game to me. Yeah. It's really the game. It's more about those strategies. Like, oh, you know, well, I, it's just, you know, it's just a game to me. It's really the game. It's more about a strategy. It's like, fuck you. Just say, yeah, I got fucking rich, bitch. Yes, yes, I did it because I'm fucking smart. Like,

doesn't even have it's not true. I'm probably gonna get a house of this one. Oh, it makes me sick here and you here and now smug you are too. I fucking get a house out of it. Good. I hope it's all true. I like being sick. Put some fire in your gut. Alright, keg spun get out of here. Thanks. Cheers. Good God. I'm gonna get a house out of it. Are we good? Are we doing more? One more? CP.

Hey, dick. Hey, Sean. Hey, okay. CP. Hey, Dick. Hey, Sean. Hey, DP. I love DP. It makes me a rage. Hmm. Being middle aged, nobody tells you. Everybody tells you how much it sucks to be all my fault when you're, when you're old, your

eyesight goes and everything. They don't tell you that the middle aged part is just as bad. So when you're a kid, you're fearing the 70s 80s 90s you should be afraid of 35 You're 30s are gonna be the worst part of your life. Oh, man I'm I don't see it Drink coffee just so I could stay up and shoot the shit with my friends now he drinks coffee just you stay awake I could drink coffee just so I can get up and take a shit by myself. Because God forbid, my body just function like it's supposed to.

I tried. You need a... You need a rain forest. Well, to take a shit in. A probiotic. A jaguar. Yeah. And all that shit.

None of it works. Coffee. Immediate. Yeah. First sip, like, we've got a poop. And I'm fucking here. You know, it makes me rage. You kids getting old sucks, but it starts 30 years

sooner than they fucking. Well, no, that's absolutely true. Fucking way while you can, man. I think you've said as much, too. It's not like you hit, you know, your, your golden years and all of a sudden your shit all just kind of breaks down. I want to say, no, and you have, yeah, in your 30s, 40s,

you have memories of, God, I used to be able to do this like no problem. Like, wait, you used to be able to kung fu kick with the best of them. And I just pulled my penis. It almost surprises you when you're like, oh wow, like that's, I never even used to have to think about that.

Yeah. For me though, I'm in my 40s. Like honestly, I still feel pretty good. Like there's, I don't, you still look okay. I still, yeah, okay. I mean, no, I mean, you know, like nobody thinks I'm 30, but like, you know, it's, I'm holding it together. Yeah.

Like that's fine, that's what I can expect. I look better than my dad did at this age. That's true. So, you know, but I don't, you know, I don't know. Some people get the nagging, you know, I'm like my knees all fucked up. I didn't even do anything, just, the cartilage just fucking went away.

And I got bone on bone, I got it, you know? And then they wait till they're 55 or 60 to have a knee replacement. But like, I'm, physical, like I'm fine. I'm in a good stretch right now. Yeah, working out. I can be able to work out again. Yeah, that's good. So I'm doing that again.

Yeah, that's always nice. Well, yeah, you're right, DP. All right, see you everybody. See you at the end. See you at the end. See you at the end. See you at the end. See you. Thank you. Old man talk. Turbo Neal Brin says that Carl guy was messaging him constantly, calling him constantly. Yeah.

He just started to talk in non-sequitors about a third of the way into that conversation. He conversations. Yeah. And then it was just like, well, no, then the barcodes. They went under in my hair. And then the banana told me that I needed to like, in my wisdom tooth, my left wisdom tooth had radio frequencies. You know, like, I mean, I thought it was a bit, well, I know, but then it did not improve. Uh, yeah.

He's saying some funny stuff. I mean, yeah, all I can say is, you know, thanks for not killing yourself. And get that lithium in the water, man, come on. Get that lithium cracking. Let's go. Those guys need anti-psychotics. Yeah, you know they're gonna put, you know that they're gonna put lithium in the water.

They're not putting lithium in the water. They fucking doing it. And not putting lithium in the water. It would be the wrong thing to put in the water anyway. That's exactly why they're gonna fucking do it. That's everything to strictly why. That has been our the water anyway. That's exactly why they're gonna fucking do it. That's everything to strictly why. That has been our, you know? That's exactly why.

You're totally right. I gotta go home and I gotta go by a shit load of bottled water right now. I haven't started putting anti-lithium filter in. There you go. Oh my God. Does it get lithium? All right, good bye.

All right, see you guys, thanks. Oh my God, I get lithium. All right, good bye. All right, see you guys, thanks.