The Dollop with Dave Anthony and Gareth Reynolds - 12 - The Rube
Episode Date: July 14, 2014Dave Anthony and Gareth Reynolds discuss legendary baseball player Rube Waddell.Tour DatesSources Dollop MerchPatreon...
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go to mingle and do what I pray so the dollop that was our theme song it's
really good it's music by Colin McCoy edited by Vicky Pezza that's it yeah
I didn't hear it nope you certainly did I was gonna pretend I did but you did not
hear it so I'm pretending it's gonna pretty bad I just a small up is what
I'm calling them small up little facts sure okay I just reading that people in
New York are putting up fake goodwill bins all over the city so people will
throw clothes in and then they just take the clothes and sell them at other
stores people are fucking horrible I what I love when people wiggle around
rules like you know what I mean like we always make these rules and they're
pretty good but there's always a way for somebody to be like no no I don't want
to fuck with that I can I'm across the border I can yep I but it's probably like
the mafia like they've probably dropped down so low yeah now they're where's
they used to like Rob everybody is overall everybody at the fish market
pays me a thousand dollars and now it's like hey you want to you want these
t-shirts members only members only baby that's right this is one one let two
left converse what do you think a gap jeans like that now what do you think a
Jordash because that's what we have all right so you're a baseball fan I like
baseball but it's lower tier sports for me okay so because we have so many
listeners in Australia I'm going to X I'm gonna briefly explain some of the
rules of baseball really quick all I need to do is talk about the pitcher because
it's about a pitcher okay you have a very devilish smile so baseball started in
the like 1870s or something and quickly a professional league developed and one
of our greatest pitchers of all time is named Cy Young and he pitched around the
turn of the century 1900 and not the 2000 no and and we have an award named
after him Cy Young yep so that's like the best pitcher baseball win that and you
know it's it's strikeouts are a big deal you throw three balls past a guy it's a
strikeout that's a big deal yeah so that's what pitchers the best pitchers
and when a lot of guys yes when great pitchers do it they throw no hitters
where nobody gets hits and that's a huge huge huge deal so that I mean that's
basically all you need to know good because we're gonna talk about Roob
Waddell man well Roob is my favorite baseball player of all time okay yeah
okay I think you're overwhelmed with the goodness as I can't even the story of
Roob Waddell is so okay he's one of the greatest strikeout pitchers in the
history of baseball okay beginning in 1898 he set just about every pitching
record there was okay now that's the exact same time that Cy Young is pitching
hmm that's interesting so you think you would know about it right and I wonder
why I don't he was one of the most feared pitchers in baseball okay and he was
an amazing idiot what do you mean he was pretty dim okay he was literally not
that smart okay but I mean I would a lot of athletes aren't no but I think right
I think it's as we peel this onion you're gonna find out just how not smart
he is the fact that his names Roob is great too well that wasn't the original
name he was given that might have been a nickname given to him by one of his
team okay yeah so that reflects his IQ there's very little known about his
youth all right but we know he grew up in Pennsylvania and he did not have a
formal education mm-hmm okay so he's just a guy yeah you know all right off the
hasty truck sure I want to emphasize again that he did not have a formal
education okay so that's it that's the thing I shouldn't be very aware so he
claimed that his childhood hobby was throwing rocks at birds and oh man that's
how he learned how to pitch oh my god yeah yeah so he's you know yeah that was
his hobby sure his hobby was to throw rocks at birds yeah so that was the
thing he did okay who needs books when you have that right yeah and why if
you're a parent why would you want to have that kid do anything else
obviously you know that's gonna translate that will obviously translate I see my
kid at school I'm like just go outside and throw rocks at birds they're gonna take
for him to go kill some birds with rocks be a success and you know he was you
know he was killing them oh for sure cuz he if he is this amazing picture he
wasn't training to pitch no he was just a little shit and then like a byproduct
of that was like hey I have a really strong right arm so by age 18 he was
ready for the minor leagues in Butler Pennsylvania okay which is before you
become a professional baseball player you start out in the minors and you work
your way up through this this system that there's three levels to it he built
his reputation by being very good-natured but he was very simple-minded
catcher Jack Nelson gave him the nickname Rube which was reserved for Hicks
right and it's dropped it stuck immediately everyone's like fuck yes
that guy's hey you're rude yeah okay look out the bird the room also didn't
quite understand the rules of baseball when he got there now see that's a red
flag for a player so in baseball if you hit the ball and the pitcher you know
like a ground ball to the pitcher he picks up he throws it to first and the
ball gets to the guy at first before you do you're out yes but the room when
he started would throw the ball at the runner and hit the runner well now let
me ask you this was the team called something like the Cardinals because
then he's just going back to his boyhood game of rock throwing at first true
that is true so no it wasn't it wasn't you imagine a coach seeing a guy do be
like no no what are you doing and then and then he would say the batter's out
where I come from when you hit him like so he's just like you come from from the
fucking crazy mountains of Pennsylvania you hit the guy with the you imagine how
horrible it was to play in that league hit the ball and the people just fucking
throwing this just we have the opposing team we like the pitchers throwing the
balls at the players yeah that's how we do well so then his next opportunity and
I don't know why this happened but Volant College which I don't think is an
existence anymore volant they great school so this is when things were
different so they wanted the great players to play for them so they would
like make offers for players in like minor leagues they would go yeah they
would like they would like try and get right it's total opposite of today so so
wait this guy who's had no education dumb as a fucking dumb as the rocks that
he's stupid as a rocket is now yeah maybe going to college I mean is this a
reality show or what they offered him free tuition and board what tuition and
what and board I'm not bored I'm having fun and a dollar a game uh-huh and free
tobacco oh I like backy this is my right hand my throwing one the college has
had seven innings per game he averaged 15 strikeouts that's pretty great that's
insane yeah wait I mean how many is that that's cuz there's three innings so
that's seven sets 21 so he was there's six six players were doing something
other than striking yeah okay it's good more than once he called for all of the
players to leave the field and he would pitch with no defense behind him what
like do you know fucking mad that are supposed to and who can see everybody
off the field is the coach a scare I don't fucking know what's happening and
everyone just leave the field then he's just pitch and they strike the guys out
okay well you should explain why that's crazy too because you have all the
people behind the pitcher who are there to field the ball and get him out so
basically the pitcher is saying like if you hit it beyond me you win with the
game what I would celebrate three strike innings by cartwheeling or walking on
his hands or somersaulting off the field back to the dugout now I'm starting to
love okay right yeah because I am so that would be the greatest thing ever
this is great a guy just somersaulting yeah so cartwheeling a grown man who can't
read who's telling his the rest of his team to leave the field
cartwheeling and somersaulting when he does well yeah that's rude the other
team us want to kill him oh my god the other fans you imagine other fans be
like motherfucker no respect so he earned reputation and next he signed for
$500 with Louisville in 1986 I think that the 1896 sorry I think they were
the Cardinals oh that's gonna be a paradox for him he's gonna throw rocks
in himself I am a bird I don't know what to do where's
rude he killed he stoned himself to death okay so club manager Fred Clark
find Rube $50 for excessive drinking and Rube quit the team that was after two
days oh wow okay I'm a huge fan I have so it how this is not a movie oh my god
yeah so the room packed up and headed I mean the first days like unpacking he
went there he unpacked he got shit-faced yeah got fine he's got packed up and he
left two days two days I mean that's really like probably like a three hours
where he could just get himself thrown off and imagine what he must have done
big loaded oh yeah kicked off the table baseball you can kick off a baseball team
drinking he's cartwheeling and telling his team to leave the field sober also
this is a team that saw what he was doing at the college cartwheeling and
telling her what to leave the field they went that guy is gonna be that's our guy
and then he drinks like wait a minute meet the new face of the franchise does
anyone else smell gin so he packed up and headed for Detroit
oh you're there his career lasted nine games when he was fined $50 for playing
at a sandlot game with local kids on his day off well he was fine for that yeah
cuz they don't want him to get hurt oh okay and Roob being against fines but may
I guess he quit the team so he left now no one knows where he went after this
period he was gone for a few months wow he just vanished and then later that
winter someone spotted him wrestling alligators in a traveling circus oh all
righty
wow right yeah so I mean you thought throwing baseball to the kids in the
sandlot was bad for the career holy shit yeah I mean I mean what else are you
gonna do in this in the winter the way I gotta make cuz this is a time with
baseball players had to make money in the off season right so why not wrestle
some alligators look you mean it was it was either that or be a welder I mean
okay so I mean that's so great it's the best thing ever what was your summer job
I was selling fridges over at Sears I wrestled Gators I'm sorry yeah me or
my my thing but I wrestled alligators all summer okay yeah I'm trying to pitch
again okay yeah we got I guess we gotta get you bird what else reappeared in the
19 and the 1899 season with the Western League's Columbus Grand Rapids team and
he quickly became a fan favorite all right for two reasons first he's rude
but he won 27 games all right and second he was complete fucking lunatic oh my
god the room wasn't known for arriving just before game time in his street
clothes so normally in baseball all the players go out and practice hitting and
they practice fielding and it's like an hour oh yeah and fans come down and they
and they watch it and they get they get balls signed by the police like a big
thing yeah tradition so he wouldn't do any of that he just show up right at
game time and then he would stroll he would stroll through the grandstand so
he wouldn't come through the players and he would come through the grandstand
walk through the stadium walk through all the fans raising a commotion as he
went through he would grab people's beers and slam them
he would eat their hot dogs oh my god and sometimes he would start fights with
fans I mean he's made himself unfindable you cannot find him I mean I
pay so much money to see but also by the same token if you're a fan yeah and
like somebody like drinks your beer or eats your food you're not like hey it's
awesome you're like buddy that's all the fucking feel a asshole you make money
pitching I came here to see you don't eat my shit he's gonna start 20 minutes
late you lost my beer and my fucking hot dog okay my kids crying oh god I gotta
fight him and then you have to fight the room often he'd throw free peanuts to
kids that's nice nice it said he would usually change into his uniform as he
ran across the diamond oh my god so did he also have been
streaking he didn't wear underwear wait oh my let's get all the details out now
get him out of the table what else we have a stick in his ass to pretend it
was a tail so essentially you have a you have a big dumb guy running through
the stands drinking beer and then he would shed all its clothes and changing
his uniform on the diet and win the game and then be the best guy out there
oh my god every everything everything before the running along the field and
changing I can get in a way that is sort of just like yeah just change you
change somewhere else there's a locker room he doesn't have time though he's
out there he just wants to play the game no time I have time to eat hot dogs and
beat up fans but changing I'm gonna need to combine that and reproaching them
the diving he was easily distracted so opposing opposing fans would hold up
puppies oh yeah he would run towards them wait wait wait so wait so he'd be
pitching a guy would be up a bat someone would hold up a puppy run over to
pet it or grab it I mean he's now gone from being really not smart yeah maybe
lobotomized he could have been although lobotomies weren't invented yet but I
would imagine if they were he might have gotten lobotomized it sounds like he
might have invented them on accident somehow he was also distracted by shiny
objects I mean and they would put him in a trance on the mound where he would
just sit there and stare at them so you could go to a game and hold up like a
spoon and he would just stare at it there would be like come on now hit him
with the puppy his head just explodes there he goes
wow the roux but also just leave in the middle of games to go fishing wait what
the fuck I mean really what do you what do you do he's the best player besides
so young I mean he's the best player of baseball except sometimes he in the
middle of the game he just walks off the mound because he wants to go fishing
it sounds what are you gonna do because he gave you half a good game at tonight's
game there are no puppies or shiny objects allowed near the pitcher all right
room I think you hit him with a stink ball right here let's get out of here
yeah I'm gonna go fishing I'm sorry I will go fishing now no we're in the
middle of the I'm done today we're in the middle I gotta fish before it's dark
bye I'm gonna change changing oh god there it is we need a new pitcher there
that means a pitcher it just always be like oh coming in again should we find
him he no don't find him okay so this is the best this is the most well-known
fact about Ruben Waddell okay if a firetruck went by the stadium I'm gonna
need to stop I I I doesn't matter what the rest of the statement is right this
is a problem okay if a firetruck went by the stage he would chase it no every
time what he would always chase a fire truck I'm starting no matter where it
was these does he maybe have a dog brain he likes puppies shiny things get him
and fire trucks well he wasn't formally educated yeah but still just your brain
become a canine brain he would only eat out of bowls on the floor he had to have
a little door in his regular door to crawl outside to go make boom oh god I
would love to see that I'm just running out of the state even all the players
like oh fuck I mean if the man the manager'd be like look if we can get
through today with no fire trucks no puppies yeah no shiny objects and he
doesn't want to go fishing we got a shot but he like also if you're cuz this is
when fire fire stations were they weren't public so you would pay them like
if you had a house you give them a monthly fee in case your house caught on
fire and then come and put it out so if you didn't pay a fee they would just show
up and let it burn so potentially you could pay the fire department just be
ordering yeah you can just order yeah go by the stadium at four and then the
room would run away real bro now room where you guys going Louisville owner
owner men so this is back now we're probably gonna go back to Louisville
right so he's been he's been playing for other teams he's been at Grand Rapids so
Louisville owner manager Barney Dreyfus got word no sorry was he not in Louisville
before he was he was okay that's where he got right but so now there's a
different you know manager yeah a different guy wants to roll the dice on
his career so they got word of a success and brought him down to Louisville
Dreyfus heard the National League was gonna consolidate and shut down his
Louisville franchise so he bought this guy bought the Pittsburgh Pirates okay
and traded the entire team to Pittsburgh and then just put a bunch of shitty
players in Louisville so when they shut down the Louisville franchise he'd be
like well I got a team over here okay he just basically pulled the fast one and
so but that all of a sudden made Roob suddenly in a really big city so he's
never been in a big city okay so now he is playing baseball in front of very
large crowds I don't like that for Roob and he's playing with Honus Wagner
okay huge historical baseball player and Fred Clark so he's he's with a good
team one of the great position in a great city yeah he's in one of the
original eight teams but I just worry Dave that there's gonna be too many
things to distract our little dog we'll see we'll see I got a bad feeling why
don't we just see what happens I just want to say I'm on record I don't feel
like I don't know why you say that because it's called the Cy Young Award so
far one teammate of this era recall Roob soaking his left arm and buckets of ice
for hours at a time claiming sincerely that he feared he'd burn up the catcher's
glove if he didn't cool it off so he thought so he does no science no no he's
not good with physics and science he doesn't get that you he's seeing
cartoons his mind lots of them a ball can catch on fire another person if you
throw it hard Roob hold on I gotta keep awesome my arm otherwise I'm gonna hurt
that poor catcher lot him on fire what I'll read the lead the league in 1900
with a 2.37 era oh wow beat he's beating Sayang at this point he's better than
say he's better than the guy the award the award is named after Sayang and he's
better this guy's better yeah I got a bad feeling but he racked up an
unimpressive 8 and 13 record okay it was part of that because there were so
many fire trucks many of his defeats came as a result of his high rate of
errors okay most people believed he committed so many errors because of his
habit of drinking at local taverns as a pregame ritual where he was known down
to suck down suck down many beers and put on an apron and play bartender aren't
you pitching today yeah oh man how many fingers oh my god I don't like a ritual
yeah a pregame ritual gotta get not that he would go every now and then and have
a pop for the game he's still pitching great yeah but when they hit the ball
at him he can't throw it to first cuz he can't pick it up cuz he's so so the
thing he can do is throw it really hard at a very small space oh yeah the guys
just like alright guys we're just gonna bunt today rooms hammer oh my god just
bunting back and just by laughing their asses and then someone holds a puppy up
and room just like falls in his own dugout I mean there's a lot of hurdles
in this guy what else player manager Fred Clark suspended him in late June of
that year it turns out the room like to pack pistols and one day he threatened
to shoot his manager full of holes and I like how he's still not getting fine
I love that he's a drunk guy he's drunk who's bringing guns to the loaded guns
threatening to kill enough ready to kill my god you'd be like wow I thought we
had problems when he was just showing up shit-faced for games he's gonna kill me
so he was he was kicked off the team and found himself playing for an
independent team in Puxentani of Puxentani yeah that's where the ground
hot yeah Pennsylvania legendary manager Connie Mack upon hearing of rooms
availability immediately signed him for his franchise the Milwaukee A's okay my
home city yeah now we're now in your area yeah so that you should know about
him yeah well I I think we probably referred him as monkey paw love love
at first sight yeah like now under Mack what I'll finally begin to excel in one
of his most famous feats after pitching a 17 inning game the Rube turned around
and pitched the second game of a double header completely shutting out the
opposing team Jesus so he pitched so normally today a pitcher will pitch seven
innings is the norm yeah sometimes eight if he's doing real sometimes nine of
his doing awesome but but generally generally like if someone throws a
hundred and twenty five pitches that is like way too much that's where that's
the line people like yeah you might have done too much this guy through triple
the normal amount Jesus in one day and shut them out and was had a dog's brain
and had a dog's brain I mean if yeah if you're the other team you're like Jesus
Christ now why did he do it why did he do it on that day what do you think was
his motivation oh Jesus Connie Mack promised him an all expense paid three
day fishing trip so he performed that's why his feats and baseball is that's why
he's doing better in Milwaukee he's surrounded by beer and the guys knows
how to work him now he's putting carrots on sticks
three-day fishing yeah sure I'll soil my career for three days in a photo I'll
keep throwing only before game straight we're only doing two today okay sure I'll
keep pitching after the game the first game was 17 innings 17 and he still
pitched that's two games already two games Jesus Christ another game what his
fascination his fascination with fire departments continue throughout his time
with the ace and he now was routinely wearing red under his clothing just in
case the bell would ring so wait wait wait no no no now now he ain't just
chasing him now he's taking his clothes and he's all coming red he's helping them
super fireman so now the middle of the game if the fire engine goes by he
becomes a fire he becomes a fireman he's a fireman now sorry you talk to the
fire department about this no she like just like showing up to be like aren't
you pitching what what's the problem here where we're gonna get it let's go
he looked all rocks at that fire dirty fire it deserves rocks oh my god yeah so
it's not like it's not like he's straighten himself out to other teams
so the pirates demanded his return they were like he's still in a contract with
us we didn't actually fire him he just threatened to shoot someone he just left
or whatever happened so within two games he was dropped by a drop by them and so
then okay when he was dropped by Milwaukee he was dropped by oh fuck you
know selling Lisa or drop him off the bridge anything you want as long as you
get him off my team oh so so that so they got him back Pittsburgh got him back
so Pittsburgh and then he was there for two days right so it's very hard to
follow because he has a lot of tears a lot of two-day stints yeah as a matter
of fact that might be a good nickname instead of the room old two-day stints
so after two days back at the pirates what the fuck could he have done Fred
Clark yelled at the owner sell him release him drop him off the monahigala
bridge do anything you like to him so long as you get him off my team so he was
not wanted yeah is he just holding a grudge cuz he threatened to murder kind
of petty isn't it so he spent the majority of the 1901 season with the
Chicago orphans wow horrible team name horrible team name right the orphans
unless they were orphans then it's all that it's terrific if the orphans did
everything and then if he goes to the orphans that's my favorite team ever yeah
no yeah oh my god the bad news bears in 1901 but I'm assuming they weren't all
orphans no that's just a terrible name the owner was just the this is a team of
people of people whose parents have died the guy walking the stands like growl
they read your girl the original name was Chicago dead parents
good good where the Chicago stillborns let's get them but he was suspended for
erratic behavior wait Roop a lot of that was because he kept chasing the fire
engines I mean at some point yeah he got a 13 and 515 record mostly blamed on
fire trucks going by the stadium it's slowly becoming evident that really the
big problem here was fire much like Frank what Frankenstein feared if they
could keep the fires under control then the room would have a better record yeah
but I mean I can't believe that nobody was able to over the span of time get
through to him yeah that just don't chase those what do you mean don't chase
the fire trucks Roop why please stop running after fire trucks and pitch
you're not a fireman right but they go by yes and I go by that's the part I'm
having a huge problem with yeah okay well I'm glad we did this yeah bye Roop he
later spent a month playing semi-pro ball in Wisconsin and then traveled to
the West Coast once in California he refused to leave signing on with a
Los Angeles franchise for the 1902 for the 1902 season okay then in mid-June
uh-oh two Pickerton guards sorry working the for the Philadelphia A's
oh boy Connie Mac boss tracked him down and dragged it back to Pennsylvania so
took him so now you why don't they just get a fire truck to drive by and chase
like have him chase it back to the old club this isn't the team that fired him
after two days last time this is the team before that yeah he wanted him back so
they kid kidnapped him I mean it's not like you could just make you can't just
take a guy back to work in another state that's called kidnapping slavery yeah
kidnapping yep that's slavery he's been fired so many times do you think when he
got fired at one point ever he misunderstood and it was like excited
fire fire fire fire no no root leave leave the bad fire so they brought him
back to Pennsylvania and Mac who was considered the only one to be able to
control him right and he really wasn't able to all that no no one was able to
control I mean nobody could take the fire truck out of his heart huge problem so
basically Mac brought him back and tried to like put him under house arrest like
that's that's how they figured great idea that's how they figured to take care
of it yes so this is when this is when pro athletes had to two jobs they play
baseball and then they do their what a regular job right so Mac forbid the
Rube from alligator wrestling in the offseason which he was still doing why
I can't so instead for additional income he started playing rugby for a
Pennsylvania team okay so that's his offseason job that better and now
everything went awesome okay so he's like getting all of his energy out he's
playing to sports he's never not playing a sport he's like a kid okay and so he
this is a years of stability that he led the league in strikeouts for the next
five years now this is when Cy Young is playing yeah he's leading he's pitching
better than five years five years it's a long time five years
Cooperstown historian Lee Allen described 1903 in the life of Rubo Adele he
began that year sleeping in a firehouse in Camden New Jersey it's just insane
he's just and ended in a firehouse he's like the Dalmatian ended it tending bar
in a saloon in Wheeling West Virginia in between those events he won 22 games
for the Philadelphia A's courted married and became separated from Mary Wayne
Skinner saved a woman from drowning accidentally shot a friend in the hand
and and was bitten by a lion that was a year
dude wait wait I mean it was the circus he got bitten by he's saved a woman from
drowning he shot his friend in the hand he was a bartender played rugby sleep in
a firehouse he got married I mean right do we know how he got bit by lion it
just it's just in the it's just in the in the hall of fame it says that shot his
friend in the hand I know why the wife left yeah that year sounds like a little
shaky yeah it wasn't a great marriage so now he's playing legendary baseball and
his only competition on the man was the Hall of Famer contemporary so young
that was his only competition at the time no one else is as good as those two
guys okay except one was a normal human and the other one was crazy yeah one had
a dog brain and one was a man his popularity skyrocketed the citizens of
Philadelphia loved him of course oh how would you know people who are from other
places Philadelphia has the most horrendous sport sports fans yes in the
country they they they used to throw batteries they embrace how horrible
they are they really they wouldn't even be offended by no that's right yeah yeah
I'll never forget when when the Giants won the World Series and Tim Litzkin was
walking off the mound and they're just all these people holding up signs above
the dugout saying how horrible his teeth are oh god yeah yeah and then he and then
he shot him out won the game yeah I'll just just like four people holding up
signs about his crooked teeth that's why we need them someone's got to do it so
Philadelphia delighted in a star who would show up at saloons and then work
at the bar the fact he was known to to play almost as much ball with local
kids as with the professional counterparts endeared him to the city so
now they're letting him play with kids yeah when you say no to that yeah he
wrestles alligator so let him do it yeah that's like the least trouble he can
get yeah let him play ball at the kids yeah you stopped him from doing what
playing ball with kids he might hurt his arm you moron of you any idea what
you've just done he's gonna try to he's gonna get bit by a lion now he was
especially popular with local firefighters who actually put him up in
local firehouses for dated days at the time so he was basically living at
firehouses around Philadelphia I mean I mean come on we just come on he's so
cute can he just stop fireman he's like a four-year-old I know he is like a lot
of people believe that it was because of the firefighters that the Rube earned
his reputation for heroism okay after saving two men from drowning while on a
duck hunting trip now wait he's already saved a woman from drowning he saved
people all the time so now he's saved two other men from drowning okay stories of
the rubes person for life-saving began to circulate it is believed that the Rube
may have throughout his life saved as many as 13 live he's just he's so
simple he's so simple he's so simple he was always on alert danger yes winning
here lion pet lion pet lion oh fruit punch hand he was always on alert the
Philadelphia Daily News wrote in 1905 how he was on a houseboat cocktail party
when he heard someone scream for help okay without a moment's hesitation Rube
dove into the frigid waters and succeeded in rescuing a passing log a
passing log yeah the person who screamed was on the boat he just jumped in and
grabbed a log look you don't you don't save 13 lives by waiting to find out
you know it's sometimes you're gonna get along sometimes you gotta go get
hypothermia and rescue wood oh look hey you guys I got her well she's okay
everyone she'll be fine hopefully she don't catch on fire okay so he's popular
right yes I would I would guess that this man would be popular so what happens
to players when they're super popular in America now well they other careers yeah
the other career obviously they run for a political office perhaps Rube took a
turn at acting oh boy he toured the nation in the vaudeville play the stain
of guilt and received critical acclaim they did not cheer as acting because he
was allowed by his fellow actors to improvise all his lines oh my god oh my
god since he was incapable of remembering oh my god oh yes yes oh to be
there oh to see a man who chases firetrucks improvise why sir have you
taken my beautiful Bridget you know you got a lot of anger yes that is darn you
scoundrel I'm old leave and hug that lady it's the greatest thing ever making
up his line I mean as a like a professional actor who would probably be
like standing there just like yes all right now wait for that that void look
to just vanish for a moment here we go now reply with my line yeah it would be
there would have nothing yeah nothing in common maybe you should ask me where you
want to go later he was lauded for his ability to quote throw the villain
twice as far as Kyle blue so I know Kyle blue is but but he was picking up the
actor who played the villain and heaving him across the stage improv yes I am he
was able to parlay his success as an actor into higher wages at the ballpark
wow because now he was a big star he's a star he's a star in 1904 he got 150
yearly pay raise from the Philadelphia athletics all right so he's rolling in
it right yep that year I don't like him with money I'll say that fair totally
fair that year Rube also inspired one of the first extended major league contract
negotiations on record okay surprised right yeah because it doesn't seem like
he would know be capable of negotiating no contract I I have a feeling he didn't
or something his catcher and roommate Aussie a shrek and ghost was the one who
was negotiating the contract ballplayers generally room two to a room while on the
road they actually still do that yeah still share the shrek couldn't handle
the nighttime habits of the room and refused to renew his contract until the
a's inserted a no eating crackers and bedcloths
I mean oh they shared a bed just pounding crackers to the point where
that is a sticking point in your contract I'm just not gonna be next to him
eating crackers anymore in 1904 Rube set baseball's all-time strikeout record at
349 wow which said for 61 years the 1905 season saw an epic duel of the
pitchers Rube and Cy Young in a 20 inning throw fest so for 20 innings they
went head-to-head really give up a run Jesus Rube took the game ball probably
most sought-after baseball in years and gave it away for free booze at a local
tavern Jesus Christ can you imagine that ball would be the most historical ball
I mean what am I one of the most external and all of baseball is without
question with a game away for some beers and he gave it away for like a couple
shots I think I know why they call him the Rube and then after he died every
bar in Philadelphia be like I have the ball no one actually knows what the ball
it's kind of good in 1905 Rube's old ways start to come back during one weekend
Rube is cited as a hero for preventing a serious fire in a crowded department
store he picked up a blazing oil stove and carried it from the building what is
he for his gun yeah but he's like a giant force go I mean yeah he's like he's
like forced up in like a Hulk body for his talk a force talk flaming gas stove
for oil stove I mean a highly flammable stove it's fucking it's like a bomb he's
carrying bomb yeah he saved the life of teammate Danny Hoffman who had been hit
in the head by a wild pitch so he must have no he must have picked up some some
with the firemen he must have picked up some skills as far as doing CPR or
whatever he was arrested on bigamy charges Jesus Christ this point he's
married a couple years turns out he had forgotten the divorce his first wife
Rube yeah he forgot he also fled town to avoid charges after he attacked and
badly injured his father-in-law because his father-in-law was like what the fuck
you're you're married to someone else and then he like tried to kill him you're
in trouble now he's later cleared of all charges but this is sort of the
beginning of the end this sort of the beginning of the downside of the room
okay so it's getting a sad okay we're gleaming the Rube yeah gleaming the
room he did lead his team to the 1905 World Series but couldn't pitch because
of an injury what what animal bit him oh well the injury happened because Rube
was making fun of a teammate straw hat and they ended up getting in a fight on
a cross-country train train holy shit you straw hats stupid
rude stop stupid ha ha he's pretty shit face rumors fled flew that gamblers
had gotten to Rube paying him to keep him out of the series uh-huh eventually
the story that a New York betting syndicate had put Waddell up in a
Manhattan penthouse with a group of showgirls took hold and the A's demolished the Giants
four games to one so people now blame him for the loss and think that he's corrupt.
So he went from being classic Philadelphia, he went for years being this awesome hero
that Arrow is drinking with and he's playing with the kids, he's in the sand lots and then
he gets hurt and they're like you fucking animal.
Put him down.
That's exactly, he was defended by Mac but he can never overcome the rumors, the fans
turned against him and he was traded in 1908 to the St. Louis Browns.
Okay.
There he set a single game strikeout record of 16 against his former teammate.
Jesus Christ.
So it's the team came to town, his old team, he fucking struck them all out, but the other
than that he was pretty mediocre, they were trying to keep him at a trouble so they hired
him as a hunter for the season, for the off season.
What?
So.
I'm going to need you to break that down a little bit for me.
So they didn't want to work in a bar or wrestling alligators so they, so they hired him as
the team hunter and then he would go shoot animals and bring them back and the owners
would eat them, the other people that worked with him.
They invented a job for him, they made up an occupation.
The team hunter?
You've never heard of a team hunter?
I've never heard of a team hunter.
Yeah, everyone's got him.
You know, Rube, we're thinking of promoting you.
Oh.
Yeah, we want you to be team hunter.
Oh, God.
Yeah, and you just go out in the woods and you just kill animal and bring it back to
us and that's really important.
That's a big job.
That's like GM.
Okay.
Is that a straw hat?
Nope.
Okay.
It was the first time he avoided scandal in years and he kept the team stuck with duck
and venison but he was drinking more and more.
That's one of the downsides of being team hunter.
In 1909, in a game against New York, he passed out on the mound.
From heat?
After giving up a home run.
So, he threw a ball, a guy hit it over the fence and then he laid down and took a nappy
nap.
I so want to see, I so want to see players picking up another guy off the mound because
he's plowed.
I want to see everything.
And taking him off the field.
Just.
It's the greatest thing ever.
Sleeping.
Well, fuck, I'm going to bed.
Rube, Rube, Rube.
Someone called the fire department to get him to drive by.
Woo.
So, St. Louis released him in 2010.
He found himself pitching in the Eastern League's Newark, France, so now he's in Newark.
So shit's not.
No.
That didn't pan out.
Then he moved to Minneapolis to pay for Joe Cantillon's Millers.
Now he's in minor league baseball.
Why?
How old is he?
I don't know.
So.
Well, he was 18 and so he's nothing.
He's like 30.
Yeah.
But then.
I know, but he's 30.
Yeah, he's 30.
True.
But he's put a lot of miles on the odometer.
He really did some living.
Yeah.
He's not a regular 30.
He's a bit, been bitten by a lion 30.
Yeah.
Right.
Right.
Now he's got a really close manager with a close relationship with his manager.
Okay.
That seems important.
Yeah.
Because he couldn't take care of himself.
So.
No.
Joe, the manager, has him move into his house.
Okay.
And then in 1912, a local dam broke.
Well, I mean, if I know our room, I'm going to guess he's got to go help.
A dam broke.
It's time to rip off his regular like play clothes and get his fire uniform on.
Well, he had read.
I'm sure he was sleeping in red.
Yeah.
He had a firetruck bed.
He volunteered to stack sandbags to block the rushing stream, standing armpit deep and
freezing waters for 13 hours.
That's actually kills two birds with one stone, though, because then he's not going to light
the catcher on fire.
No, he's not.
He contracted pneumonia from which he never fully recovered.
Jesus Christ.
From then on, he was plagued by injury illness, pneumonia, which was made worse because of
his nonstop drinking.
Right.
That'll hurt.
He pitched poorly for the Minneapolis Millers in 1913, concerned by the drastic decline
of his health.
Joe sent him to San Antonio Tuberculosis Sanitarium in 1914.
So that's not good.
No.
That's like it.
You're going to die now.
Right.
Place.
So he died there on April Fool's Day 1914.
He was 38.
Let me just say that that's a great day for him to go.
Right.
Yeah.
He died on April Fool's Day.
It's a great day for him.
I mean, it's perfect.
Yeah.
It couldn't be better.
He'd be happy.
So, OK, so he's 38.
OK.
He was penniless.
OK.
He was notorious for not being concerned about money.
In his best season, he made $2,500, which was given to him $10 at a time by Connie Mack.
Smart.
You definitely want to be doing it like that.
You don't want to give him $2,500.
You know, he's going to be like, look, I bought a robot.
Oh my God.
Oh my God.
Rube.
Rube.
That's a garbage can.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
It's silver.
Me and my friend are a robot.
We're going to solve crime murders.
Oh my God.
Oh, Rube.
Oh, Rube.
Oh, sweet.
Sweet little Rube.
Oh, Jesus.
Oh, fire engine.
Yeah.
He was buried in an unmarked grave in a San Antonio potter's field.
What?
How fucked up is that?
That's so fucked up.
A few months later, his baseball playing friends passed a hat and provided him with a gravestone.
Former teammate.
Oh, God.
It's the track.
Yeah.
Yeah.
The guy.
The cracker.
The cracker buddy.
Yeah.
The cracker guy.
Provided the insightful epitaph for the headstone.
Rube Waddell had only one priority to have a good time.
Right?
That seems pretty fitting.
They almost went with party machine.
Fuck machine.
When he died, he had no idea how many women he had married in his life.
Wow.
I mean.
Yeah.
Slept with.
Sure.
Yeah.
Right.
Married.
Married.
That's crazy.
So more than 10?
Yeah.
Yeah.
15 to 50.
I don't know.
So you can meet women and drug and stupor and then marry them.
Well, if you don't learn any facts.
Yeah.
When you're being brought up.
Yeah.
You could very easily think that you could marry anyone.
Right.
And it was just like a sweet thing you did.
No, this is like if Tarzan played baseball.
That's totally, totally.
Right down to the shout that probably he did behind the fire trucks.
He did live at the right time though, because if I mean, if he was alive, if this guy was
alive today, today, get out of here.
I mean, he wouldn't get anywhere near anything.
Even being the greatest, one of the greatest pictures of all time, he wouldn't get near
anything.
No one would let him play.
No, he would be like one of those guys who had like a show on spike.
Yeah.
He'd have like a reality show.
Totally.
And he'd be, he just like have his own league in a cornfield somewhere and people would
try to come and hit him.
He'd be like Kevin Costner in Field of Dreams, but the voice was fake.
Wait, are you saying that voice wasn't fake?
In Field of Dreams?
Well, no, that it is real in the movie.
Okay.
Right?
Maybe you believe it's real in real life.
No.
No.
But in, no.
Don't rub me.
Don't make me rub.
Bastard.
So they would have nothing to do with him today.
No matter how talented he was.
But it's crazy that even with all that shit, don't you think that he still should be known
as, I mean, like Babe Ruth, for instance, the greatest baseball player of all time was
a fucking alcoholic, a womanizer, just a glutton.
Yeah.
And we know him.
But this guy is known, if you bring up his name, he's known as the guy who chased the
fire trucks.
Like he's not known as 13 major league seasons.
He led the league and strikeout seven times.
He won the pennant in 1905 at a record of 27 and 10.
Seven shout outs and ERA of 1.48.
ERA of 1.48 is fucking insane.
And it's just, it is just that he chased too many fire trucks.
And that he was a crazy boo sound.
I got bit by lions.
Yes.
But even with that, I think you get that on its own that you can maybe play with that.
It's the fire station trucks firemen.
Well, what about the going through the crowd and grabbing hot dogs and fighting people?
Crazy.
Crazy for sure.
But in that story, that was brought up one time.
Yeah.
The amount of times that he chased fire trucks or slept at a fire department or were firemen
outfits was 10 to 15.
No, yeah.
So I get why that plagued him.
Why wasn't he just a fireman?
Why just, I don't understand how you couldn't possibly, nobody could talk him down from this?
No.
Nobody could say, Rube, listen.
Imagine how much they tried.
During the games, don't.
Rube, please.
During the games, don't.
Do you know how many times he had that conversation?
Oh, a thousand.
Oh my God.
Endless.
Endless.
Today.
And still.
Please don't chase the fire trucks.
No, Rube.
Just today of all days.
Rube, when we hear a fire truck today, we're not chasing it, right?
Don't chase it.
That feels very noncommittal.
I'm not going to put you out on the mound if you're going to chase it like I told you,
Rube, so.
I'm serious.
You better not.
My God.
Is that a fireman's uniform underneath that?
It's just red.
God damn it.
I like red.
No, Rube.
Do you hear that?
I want to know how he got bit by the lion.
He was petting it, right?
He was probably trying to do something that you just shouldn't do with a lion.
I mean, whatever it is, he probably looked at it like a big dumb cat, you know?
He's probably like, pretty kid, he might get purr.
And then the lion was like, sir.
Excuse me, sir.
A dominant creature.
A glorious animal.
Glorious.
Wrestling alligators.
There you go.
Wow.
I think better than the story of Doc Ellis, who pitched a no-hitter on Asher.
I agree, even though that is its own amazing story.
That is a day.
That is one day where a guy took Ashen to know who's pitching, and then pitched a no-hitter.
I think you show me a highlight reel of both of these guys.
One of them is going to be two hours, one hour and ten minutes.
Wow.
How do you feel?
I feel like more people should know about the mood.
It should be a movie, right?
That should absolutely be a movie.
How is it not a fucking movie?
I mean, it's a dark comedy.
Well, you would need to be scaling it back.
You'd be like, what are we going to lose?
There's too much shit to cover.
You would have to scale it back.
Something.
Because it's insane.
It doesn't stop.
And we got to put the firetrucks in there.
That's something.
A lot of firetrucks.
It is a period.
It's a lot of the budget there.
That's most of the budget there.
Yeah.
I don't know where you're going to find all those firetrucks.
Fuck.
If you have any topics, you think I'm mostly just doing American stuff right now.
I might branch out.
I'm trying to avoid politics.
Yeah.
Unless a story is really crazy, but I just don't want to get into all that shit.
You know, I don't I don't want to be.
Well, that's just just what mostly people do is rip on each other about politics.
I hate all.
Yeah.
Parts of it.
There's a really crazy story that's happening in Mississippi right now.
I might cover it.
It's fucking insane.
But for the most part, I just don't think it's fun.
Well, I also think it's just when you get involved in that, like to me, I'm always like, if you
step back from the world of politics, it's just all so fake and fabricated to kind of
arguing like this.
Yeah.
It's like us arguing about like Disney characters.
Yeah.
But I mean, there's a lot of fucking idiots.
But I mean, someday I might do one about stuff.
Just stuff Ronald Reagan has said.
Oh.
Or fucking W.
I mean.
Yeah, you could you could do you could do Reagan, George.
We could do Reagan versus W.
And you could put Tony Abbott in there as the Prime Minister of Australia right now.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah, yeah.
And you would not be able to tell who's saying the dumber thing.
I my guess is you'd be get confused between Abbott and Reagan a good amount.
I had one trees cause pollution.
Who said that?
Well, see, that's not Bush.
I know that's not Bush because that is misleading.
Not really just crazy.
That's like an attempt to get.
So I'll say Tony Abbott.
Reagan.
Wow.
What a fucker.
Who said also who called the Greeks Grecians?
I'll go with Abbott as George W. Bush.
Who said that missiles after fire can be put put back in the submarines can be recalled.
Reagan.
Yeah.
We will be able to retract the missiles back out of the submarines.